Tre Miller Rodriguez's Blog, page 47

Because a 7am dance party on the roof of a department store is...

Because a 7am dance party on the roof of a department store is exactly how Gayson wanted to start his last morning in New York. #daybreaker (at Lord & Taylor)

Happy Pirate Day, ye hearties! (Johnny’s Bar, West Village)

Happy Pirate Day, ye hearties! (Johnny’s Bar, West Village)

Happy Pirate Day, ye hearties! (at Johnny’s Bar)

Happy Pirate Day, ye hearties! (at Johnny’s Bar)

All smiles & leather harnesses here…until I go emo because...

All smiles & leather harnesses here…until I go emo because my best gay (Gayson) is really moving to London in five effing days. (The Eagle NYC)

All smiles & leather harnesses here…until I go emo...

All smiles & leather harnesses here…until I go emo because my best gay (Gayson) is really moving to London in five effing days. (at The Eagle NYC)

Reveling in a weekend of bass lines not color lines at...

Reveling in a weekend of bass lines not color lines at AfropunkFest with Mr. Present. Seriously memorable sounds from Morcheeba, TV on the Radio, George Clinton and Gallant. Also a spontaneous electric slide involving hundreds of audience members, vegetarian-friendly food vendors and a tricycle race through playground sprinklers.

Peace, marbling & fashion that’s fresh AF (Afropunk,...

Peace, marbling & fashion that’s fresh AF (Afropunk, Brooklyn)

Not-So-Light in August

This is the first August in 11 years where I’ve wanted to press the fast-forward button straight to September. Because how exactly do you mark the August birthday of your late husband AND your wedding anniversary…when you’re very much in love with someone else? 

Experience (and research for my Modern Loss columns) points me toward carving out griefspace on milestone days. This year that meant dinner with Alberto’s sister the day after his actual birthday and spending this afternoon—my wedding anniversary—with a girlfriend after wrapping a client project this morning. 

Over the seven years since Alberto died, my August rituals seem to shift annually: sometimes there’s an emphasis on re-living memories…sometimes it’s about creating new ones. Until I’m actually in the moment, I never know which direction nostalgia will take me. So here’s to feeling the feels and going with the emotional flow. (And to the friends and relatives who raise their glasses to mine on these days.)

Beautiful ducking afternoon in da park. (Central Park, NYC)

Beautiful ducking afternoon in da park. (Central Park, NYC)

Beautiful ducking afternoon in da park. (at Central Park in...

Beautiful ducking afternoon in da park. (at Central Park in NYC)