Mari Ness's Blog, page 28

This is not exactly an update

...because along with everyone else, I have been following Twitter and Boston feeds.

So more on the latest issue of Mythic Delirium, which includes my poem "Gleaming," and about 16 One Sentence Stories, which includes my very little story "For a Mortal's Love," next week, when hopefully we'll all be more able to pay attention.

Game of Thrones, Season 3, Episode 3

Another week, another chance for HBO actors to remove clothing and liberally apply fake blood!


1. After watching this episode, my brother has decided that the best ending for the show is for Arya to end up as "Queen of Everything" with Hot Pie as her Official Baker and Pastry Chef. I'm just throwing this out there as an idea, HBO execs and George RR Martin. Just throwing it out there.

2. Speaking of endings we were both disappointed that Joffrey isn't dead yet.

(Yes, we've both read the books. This does not change our general viewpoint.)

3. HBO, if the general idea of showing me Theon tortured, then allowed to escape on a lovely white horse, then almost raped, then saved by some excellent target shooting, was to get me to feel some stirrings of pity, then, congratulations! It worked. I have feelings of pity. For the lovely white horse.

(It was not clear in the end but just the people, not the horses, got shot, right? Because that was a very lovely horse and it jumped over things with a nicely flowing tail and tossed its mane in the proper horse tossing mane matter and this sentence is exactly why I don't exactly talk much about horse riding in my fiction.)

4. Speaking of Theon – so the guy that "helped" Theon escape and then shot arrows into everyone is Ramsey Bolton-Snow, yes? I vaguely recall a sentence or two in A Dance With Dragons suggesting that Ramsey allowed Theon to escape just to increase the feelings of torture and despair and then removed his toenails, which seems like a Ramsey sort of thing to do. My hopes that this storyline would be eliminated are thus completely dashed.

I told a couple of people in March, quite truthfully, that I would be fine if Martin never did end up finishing the series, since this feels less like a series moving forward to some grand confrontation/triumphant conclusion (like most epics) and more like a glimpse into part of the history of this world, where things happened before and will happen after. Much like reading about the War of the Roses. I meant that. But having said that, I sincerely do hope that there is a payoff to Theon's storyline in either books or show. I find Show!Theon slightly less irritating, since the actor has done a decent job of showing how isolated and insecure he is, but still, even beyond the misogyny (carried over into the show), the betrayal, the "why me," the killing of two little kids for his own ego, the ongoing torture bit, the participation in another person's torture, this has been a really unpleasant storyline to plow through, and I want some sort of payoff. What, I don't know. But some.

5. On a more cheerful note, hands down best scene of the episode: Musical chairs! Entirely made by the facial reactions and delightful insults and Tyrion's "Far be it for me to interfere with the course of true love..." Season Four series finale, I am much looking forward to you.

6. Ok, this week's HBO's Quota of Unnecessary Nudity and Lots of Breasts did at least lead to a joke, and I'm all for naked bodies, especially naked bodies, or, in this case, almost naked bodies that can bed like that, and the three women had clearly worked hard to get figures like that so we should all celebrate and enjoy this, but...HBO, this would feel slightly less exploitive if you also included more male nudity. No less completely gratuitous, but slightly less exploitive.

7. What's odd is that combined with this were three separate scenes showing the real horror of rape – and kudos to the show for showing that yes, this happens to men too. The bit where Jaime tries to advise Brienne about rape, and her terror as she's dragged off, and her fury and humiliation when she's returned....Agonizing and well done.

8. I was NOT expecting Jaime's hand to get cut off in this episode but as soon as they called for a knife I squeaked and had to grab a cat. And it's a good thing I was holding the cat because I needed SOMETHING to help me through the horror, and by horror, I mean the jarring, punk version of The Bear and the Maiden Fair that played over the credits. What was that?

Also, how is a hand severed off with so little blood spurting everywhere? I mean, this was the same episode that showed us multiple crucified people, so...er? I have nothing.

9. I say nothing, Jon Snow, because oh you are boring. Which is slightly better than emo, but, boring. Then again you look very very cold and I grant that it is hard to match the interest level of people who insist on putting their corpses into weird spiral shapes.

10. WARNING MASSIVE CLASSICAL MISQUOTE AHEAD for Rome fans only: Though, now that I think about it, how cool would it be for Edmure and Mance to meet in the show and for Mance to grin wildly at Edmure, plunge a dagger into him and say, Et tu Riverlord? RIVERUN DELENDA EST. Revenge!

More seriously, what are the chances that HBO went with that casting because Martin knows Edmure and Mance are meeting up later? Strong? Slim? Nonexistent? In actual fact a Jane Austen reference suggesting that everyone is about to be very very polite and not remove any clothing whatsoever—no, I forgot what show I'm talking about.

11. Ugh, Craster. Ugh. Nothing more to say here really, but, ugh.

Grumble. Bifocals

So yesterday I managed to pull myself out and down to the eye doctor/glasses store. It was a bit iffy since I wasn't feeling great, but I've been putting off going to the eye doctor for about...oh, a year now, and in another few weeks I won't be able to go without assistance or pick up my new glasses. So I off I went.

Unfortunately, when I'm tired, my double vision gets considerably worse, so, one eye exam and various flipping lenses and one eye measurement later my eyes were constantly watering and I had a hellish headache, bad enough that lunch did not stay down afterwards. Grr. The test also confirmed what I have been figuring for a few months now -- it's time for bifocals. Grumble. It's not bad yet, but I feel all old. (And now you know why I was avoiding the eye doctor.)

This, plus the dizziness/vertigo, the trike and the double vision also means a) no progressive lenses (those can induce/worsen dizziness) and b) I'll be using two pairs of glasses -- one pair of bifocals for normal use when I'm in the wheelchair/most times on the scooter, and a pair of non-bifocal sunglasses to use with the trike/some times on the scooter.

Anyway, on good news, I don't have glaucoma, just increased blurriness in my left eye, I don't have cataracts, and I will have red sunglasses. So, mixed yay?

Georgette Heyer's The Reluctant Widow

Feeling hideous at the moment, but wanted to note that my post on Georgette Heyer's The Reluctant Widow just popped up at Tor.com and is already generating some cheery discussion.

Game of Thrones, Season 3, episode 2

Show, I almost wish you'd bring back the nudity!


1. You know, one of the best things about Storm of Swords was that it was an entire book without Theon in it. At all. Seriously awesome.

I like Show!Theon better than Book!Theon but not THAT much, and I am not getting as much pleasure out of watching him get tortured as I should. Mostly because, a AUUGH THAT WAS SERIOUSLY REVOLTING and b I don't like Theon. I was so hoping we'd be spared this for a couple more seasons :(

On a related note I guess this means we can expect other stuff from A Dance With Dragons to pop in as well?

2. As expected, Diana Rigg turns out to be epic as the Queen of Thorns.

3. I rather feel that Catelyn's whole confession that everything that happened since is because she couldn't love a motherless child is a) wrong, and b) thrown in for fans of the book who wanted Catelyn to realize that yes, yes, she SHOULD have been a better mother to both Jon and Theon. (To repeat, I don't like Theon, but his memories, combined with Jon's, suggest that Catelyn was really pretty awful to both of them.)

However, Catelyn, everything that's happened since did not happen because you couldn't love a motherless child. It happened because

- Eddard Stark agreed to be the Hand of the King, leave Winterfell even though Winter Was Coming as we keep hearing and hearing, either at your insistence (book) or because you didn't persuade him not to (show)
- You thought arresting Tyrion Lannister and bringing him to your nutty sister was a brilliant idea.
- You failed to tell Sansa to be on her guard in King's Landing.
- Joffrey thought killing Bran was a good idea.
- Joffrey thought killing Ned Stark was a good idea.

I'm not saying that Catelyn's attitude towards Jon helped any of this, or that it was a good thing, just that in the long, long list of Things Catelyn Did Wrong, that's not the only thing she should be feeling guilty over.

Though it was a pretty good scene, so, rock on, Show.

4. I have to say, out of everyone on this show, I think my greatest pity is reserved for the actors and crew doing the Iceland stuff. This looks cold. And miserable. And cold. And if it isn't actually cold, and miserable, and cold, kudos to the crew for giving it that look.

5. I had to crack up when Gendry yelled at Arya for not giving other names to Jaqen. In the book, of course, Arya's a little younger and considerably more traumatized and we hear her point of view, which clarifies why she doesn't name more critical people – and her regret when she realizes that she didn't. In the show, despite an attempt to suggest that she was trying to spy on Tywin Lannister for her brother, the failure to name Joffrey when pretty much EVERYONE is eagerly but eagerly waiting for the death of Joffrey was like AUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH!

6. Speaking of Joffrey, you keep thinking he can't get any worse, and then, he insults the tailor putting him in such lovely lovely clothing which is the only thing giving him any air of kingship whatsoever. I mean, really. I give him a slight pass on the "kill all the gays" thing since let's face it having the generally good guys be pro gay or indifferent gay while the currently hands down most evil character on the show (since we're only just getting to know and loathe the Boltons) is anti-gay is not really a bad message.

Also speaking of Joffrey, SOME PEOPLE in this household actually said kindly things about his comment on intelligent women, solely to annoy me, which means that I missed bits of dialogue. We are however still unified on Joffrey needs to die now.

7. BRIENNE N' JAIME 4EVER! Surrounded by little red hearts! Seriously I think this is the first couple on the show I am entirely rooting for, even with the awareness that Martin is not exactly renowned for writing Fluffy and Happy Romantic Endings and that these two are in for a lot of hell in the upcoming seasons. But for now let me dream, k?

RIP Roger Ebert

It's not an understatement to say that Roger Ebert taught me to watch movies.

Oh, sure, I'd seen movies. I loved movies. But Ebert, in his various passionate film reviews, showed me what to look for. He could often be wrong about films. He was more often right, and it was thanks to him that I discovered so many beautiful, wonderful moments on film. I collected the books of his film reviews and read them and worked on narrative and found movies to look for.

I hope wherever you are, Mr. Ebert, you can still enjoy a big bucket of popcorn, a Coke, and movies in the company of friends.

Game of Thrones, Season 3, Episode 1

Just realized that I failed to post my general thoughts on this. Gulp!


1. Good to see Julius Caesar back as King Over the Wall. Less good to see his terrible wig.

2. Speaking of terrible wigs, is it just me, or are the wigs they are putting on Dany getting worse and worse each season?

3. On the other hand, I can see that we are all going to be craving Margaery's wardrobe even as many of us keep craving for her to wear less of it. (Which, since this is This Show, will doubtless be happening next episode.)

4. So having gotten me to almost sorta kinda like Tywin last season (with his Arya interactions) the show has kindly allowed me to go back to hating him. Thanks, show! On a related note, the scene between him and Tyrion was nicely cold.

5. Another episode, another moment of Joffrey being an absolute coward as a "mere girl" (Joffrey's impression, not mine) has the courage (gasp gasp) to go and talk to poor people (gasp gasp gasp), followed by another moment of Joffrey being an absolute jerk to his mother. I mean, ok, I'm not overly sympathetic, but still.

Which leads to a major problem: I'm really not sure how long the show can keep Joffrey alive without alienating viewers, especially if they follow the timeline of Storm of Swords, which kills off several "good" (well, comparatively) characters first. The actor playing Joffrey is doing a superb job, no question, but he's if possible even more loathsome on screen than he is in the book, and I'm finding myself joining everyone in calling for his death. So, how long can HBO stretch this out?

6. Melisandre is still not working for me on screen. I don't know if it's that they are trying to play her "exotic" in a show that already has dragons and giants and weird bugs jumping out of sphere things to bite people, or her line readings, or what, but even after birthing the shadow babies, she's just not coming off as terrifying or competent or fanatical. Which in turn means that I didn't believe one word of her speech about how she could have stopped the wildfire or at least halted the damage -- and the thing is, I should have. It made sense.

And that's a problem: in the books she manages to come off as all three. And in the books she clearly thinks of herself as kindly and well intentioned (even if no one sees her as kindly and well intentioned.) Here, she's coming across as someone who knows she's being cruel. It's just wrong.

7. However, DRAGONS! I particularly liked the shot where the dragon was skimming under the water and the way the dragon has figured out how to crisp his own little fish to the proper temperature. Yum, dragon, yum. Yay dragons.

Here's to another season!

An Open Letter to Gmail's New Compose

Dear Gmail's New Compose,

You suck.

- Me.

Weekend musings

Saturday I decided it was high time to rejoin the human race, so I took my little scooter over to the farmer's market, quite forgetting that we were supposed to head down to my mother's. Whoops!

I have mixed feelings about the whole going by mobility scooter thing. I used to take the trike, but that requires using the cane once I arrive, and the farmer's market is filled with small excited children looking for clowns, camels, and ice cream and not me; I've been knocked down a couple of times. So I thought the scooter would work. And it does, sorta, but I still find using the thing outside of theme parks highly irritating -- not to mention it's kinda terrifying to cross busy streets with it. It's low to the ground, and I know drivers can't always see me in it, and for safety reasons it can only go so fast. I really wish it had a way to go just a little faster when crossing busy streets. Oh well. Not to mention that my feet swell up after a mere hour on that thing. Grr.

But I did do fairly well at the farmer's market, since local oranges, cucumbers and tomatoes were all on sale. The prices may quite possibly mean that I overdid it on cucumbers; I don't like oranges, so I restrained myself there, but cucumbers are awesome, so, no restraint. Local honey was not at all on sale, but it was there so, er, local honey. Also a mango cheddar which, yes, I shouldn't be eating at all, but, mango cheddar. What can I say?

Hopes that the trip would shake cobwebs from my head were alas overly optimistic. I came home feeling completely drained, a feeling that persisted and worsened on Sunday, when my body suddenly decided it had had enough. I wasn't dizzy - a nice change - just completely wiped, so I spent much of the day sleeping, looking outside to not see hummingbirds (they've been coming to our feeders, but never when I'm looking) sleeping, comforting a cat, sleeping again. I still feel drained this morning, if at least a little more capable of finishing sentences.

In mostly unrelated news my brother put up a second set of bird feeders and a birdbath near the dinette window. This has delighted a number of creatures, including the two cardinals who appear to have taken up permanent residence in the yard, some house wrens, one very happy cat (the window has a sill that is about the perfect size, if you are a cat), and, of course, one squirrel. The arrangement was not precisely ideal at first, since the birdbath was located within perfect jumping distance of the feeder for the squirrel, who would see either me or the cat and leap happily over to the birdbath, scattering water everywhere. This has been changed, forcing the squirrel to either leap down to the ground or climb down a pole, burning off some of the calories gained from the sunflower seeds. I've yet to see anything other than the squirrel using the birdbath, but summer is coming. We shall see.

Chaucer tweets American Pie. Kinda.

Forgot to mention that this was happening while Twitter was happily ignoring my existence and refusing to let me look at it last week.

Sample: "And als the ladyes came to bange a gong, to call Arthur to Avalon, Ich sawe Odin laugh grim and garisshe - the daye the musique perisshede."

It gets even better.