Liz Everly's Blog, page 11
January 24, 2018
Justice Wears A Stiletto
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“No one is regular when it comes to sex.” ~Candor Moore
Secret Service Agent Candor Moore puts her life at risk every day to protect the men and women this country elects to high office. She expects no thanks, would prefer to remain invisible. So when she saves the life of Senator Thomas Kincaid she doesn’t know how to handle his sudden romantic interest in her. Love is messy. Love is unpredictable. Love cannot be controlled. But sex where she can exercise her full Femme Domme nature? Oh, yes.
Thomas can’t stop thinking about the beautiful guardian angel who put her body between him and a bullet—the first woman to spark his interest since his wife died. Candor proves to be a hard sell when he asks her out, and even harder to pin down around commitment. Thomas had never considered himself a sexually submissive man, but for his Mistress Angel’s love, he’ll go all in—which proves to be the key to earning her heart.
BUY LINKS for Spanking the Senator
Amazon US Amazon UK Amazon CA Amazon AU Barnes & Noble Kobo
About the Justice Series
Washington, D.C. is full of powerful women. Meet the three most formidable. In Elizabeth SaFleur’s Justice series, meet three D.C.-based Femme Dommes—Stella, Candor and Julianna—and the submissive men who get what they need: discipline, love and a larger purpose.
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About the Justice Series
About the White House Gets A Spanking, book #1
About Spanking the Senator, book #2
~~~~~
Elizabeth SaFleur writes contemporary romance that dares to “go there.” Expect alpha males (and females), seductive encounters, and love. Learn more about her steamy and sexy stories by following her on Amazon and Bookbub.
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January 19, 2018
Sexy Saturday Round Up
[image error]By Elizabeth Shore
The SAG awards are on tomorrow night and Oscar nominations will be announced on Tuesday. You know what that means – it’s time to binge watch movies this weekend! Three Billboards? Ladybird? The Shape of Water? Who cares?! Grab the popcorn and pull up a chair. There are plenty of great options to choose from. But before you do, don’t forget to catch up on your reading. We’ve rounded up some great stuff for you, peeps. Enjoy!
From Elizabeth:
Thinking ahead to Valentine’s Day but have no cash? Here are 9 great gift ideas you can even manage on a shoestring.
Puzzled about what to do this weekend? You could always clear out your junk drawer.
Man baffled that not every home has a poop knife.
Best. News. Ever. Lying in bed all weekend is good for you!
From Madeline:
Is Aziz Ansari like Harvey, Matt, Kevin, and Louis? Or do we have here The Cat Story from the New Yorker, part two? Vox explains.
I know who I wanna be when I get old: Advanced Style features fashion iconoclasts over 30 who kick ass.
Is dating your boss bad for your career? Duh! But Science of Relationship explores why…
Smoking a doobie while breastfeeding? You’re not the only one, apparently.
These amazingly creepy doll house crime scenes were created by America’s first woman police captain and “The Mother Of Forensic Science” so her cops would learn not to muck up the evidence collecting and spot important clews. Check it out!
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January 15, 2018
Dating Apps and Ghost Dicks
Iby Kiersten Hallie Krum
Everyone who has been on a dating app/site has horror stories. In Alisha Rai’s book, Serving Pleasure (a must read), the heroine goes on a series of first dates in an attempt to meet the kind of man her traditional mother would approve and thus be the daughter she believes her mother wants. To research this book, Ms. Rai joined dating apps and went on a series of dates, some hilarious disasters she live chronicled on Twitter. So when I joined early in 2017, I was well prepped to endure many toads before finding even the hint of a potential prince.
I did not anticipate Ghost Dicks.
I’ve been on two “dating” apps since last March, though I didn’t start actively engaging until July. I went in with a healthy skepticism, shields at the ready, prepared to swipe left far more often than I would right. Over the past months, I’ve met a shocking (to me) amount of married men looking for a fling and the expected quota of boy men looking for hookups. Some engagements have been quite flattering. I’m not ashamed to admit to enjoying being called beautiful and sexy even with the foreknowledge that such compliments may be merely a line. Everyone on dating apps has an agenda. Even me.
Despite my metaphoric arched eyebrow over the whole process, I went into this with a few outright, perhaps obvious goals. But in the last few months, my goals have changed. Before I was looking for a date (among other things); now, I’m just hoping they don’t turn out to be a Ghost Dick.
Ghosting is (apparently) pop-culture parlance that all the kids are fluent in, but which was new to me. It’s when someone with whom you’ve been communicating…disappears with now warning. Poof. Gone.
Ghosted.
It’s supremely vexing.
My best friend coined the phrase “Ghost Dicks,” because ghosting is a seriously dick move. I’ve had multiple connections with potential dates where sometimes weeks of texting and communicating ends in stunning, inexplicable silence. I’m not talking “this chick is cray cray, she’s totally getting blocked,” I’m talking about “I can’t wait to meet you” and then…absolutely nothing. There were even interactions with one or two of these men that developed into intense, intimate sharing, things I don’t lightly reveal to just anyone, so I was invested in a potential in-person meeting, which made me even more gobsmacked when instead, I was treated to more utterly asinine behavior. Just the other day, I read a Facebook post of someone whose date got too handsy on their first time out. I immediately thought, “damn, at least you got a date.”
I began to wonder if something was wrong on my end. Was I too open? Too forward? Too needy? Too pushy? Things women have been conditioned to think, to blame themselves, when something involving a man goes wonky. But then I remembered–it is so not remotely related to me. Not as a person or as a woman. Nor is it a silent commentary on my worthiness or attractiveness as a prospective date. They are just being total dicks.
Ghost Dicks aren’t limited to any specific age or profession or lifestyle or race or anything outside of them having an XY chromosome. Not for nothing, but one of the things that really cranks me up about the experience is knowing that I just have to start all over again only to risk having the same thing happen. I’ve gotten to the point where I’ve said at the start, “be a man and don’t ghost on me” and still, the bastard disappeared!
Who needs a relationship? I’m going through most of the stages of one from attraction to breakup without even meeting the wankers!
Has no one learned the basics of respect? Because I don’t think it’s naïve or silly to expect someone who’s considering being physically and emotionally intimate with me to be an actual adult and not a juvenile coward. Most wouldn’t bail on a business associate like this–not and hope to keep the business. So why is it OK to simply disappear from a romantic entanglement–even if it’s only still in the potential stages–without even the basic courtesy of “sorry babe, this isn’t working for me”?
I know high school never ends, but really?!?!
On one actual in-person date, I ask the guy what was the deal with guys ghosting. His theory was that guys did this when they moved on to a “better prospect” but didn’t want to completely sever the connection in case the new one didn’t work out. In what crazy world would a woman take a guy back after such treatment? Because we’re all, what, contestants on The Bachelor desperate for your special snowflake attention? Please.
I’ll admit, my reaction may seem a bit…extreme. But I have no patience for bullshit, especially when it involves people’s emotions, and let’s face it, if you’re on a dating site, you’re emotionally invested on some level. I’m not saying you want to marry every dude (or lady) you “like”, merely that the act of preparing to open yourself to someone new, to some picture and profile on a dating app, involves making yourself emotionally accessible. Being vulnerable. Have some bloody respect for that, damn it.
Am I expecting too much? Is my bar set too high? Can there be a “too high” setting on something like this–an attempt to emotionally (and, let’s face it, sexually) connect with someone who will respect you enough to at least say “goodbye”? Have you been on a dating app/site and experienced a Ghost Dick? Got a theory as to why such pricks are so prevalent? Let me know in the comments.
Follow Lady Smut. We won’t ghost on you. Promise.
Kiersten Hallie Krum writes smart, sharp, and sexy romantic suspense. She is the award-winning author of Wild on the Rocks, and its follow-up, SEALed With a Twist. She is also a past winner of the Emily Award for unpublished novels.
A member of the Romance Writers of America, the New Jersey Romance Writers, and the Long Island Romance Writers, Kiersten has been working in book publishing for more than twenty years in marketing and promotion. At other times in her career, she’s worked back stage for a regional theater, managed advertorials for a commerce newspaper in the World Trade Center, and served as senior editor for a pharmaceutical advertising agency.
Writer, singer, editor, traveler, tequila drinker, and cat herder, Kiersten avoids pen names since keeping her multiple personalities straight is hard enough work. Born and bred in New Jersey (and accent free), Kiersten sings as easily, and as frequently, as she breathes, drives fast with the windows down and the music up, likes to randomly switch accents for kicks and giggles, and would be happy to spend all her money traveling for the rest of her life. Find out more about Kiersten and her books on her website www.kierstenkrum.com.
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January 12, 2018
Sexy Saturday Round Up
[image error]By Elizabeth Shore
Hey Sexies! Here we are, two weeks into the new year. Who’s tired? Anyone? I gotta confess, I’m not just tired but downright exhausted. Work is going gangbusters, madness has ensued. The holidays feel like I can barely remember what happened they were so long ago. I’m ready for another break. But, hey! There’s one on the horizon. For those of you who’ve got Monday off in celebration of Dr. King, good on ya. Enjoy, relax, remember how great he was. For those of you who will be toiling away on Monday, take your break now and check out this week’s fabulous round-up of goodness. Put your feet up and stay awhile. You’ve earned it. 
Let’s (Not) Have a 3-Way with My Hot Friend
Imagine a man and woman, a committed couple, cozy in each other’s arms. They’re in front of a fireplace, stretched across a soft rug and covered by plaid blanket A half empty bottle of red wine is within reach. Everything is bliss. Until he asks, “Have you ever thought about us doing it with ______.” No, blank isn’t Charlie Hunnam or Chris Hemsworth. It’s her friend. The hot one with the perfect legs, curvy ass and Instagram ready smile. [image error]
Just like that, the sweetness of the moment is gone, and she’s left with an uncertain queasy sensation that starts in her stomach and spreads to her heart. Never mind what happens to her mind. She can’t decide which of her emotions to deal with first. Anger? Hurt? Disgust? Humiliation?
Imagine she says no. But, because she’s reeling from that freshly-delivered nasty basket of emotions, she replies gently, as though she’s hoping that by speaking softly the whole matter will float up the chimney, drifting out into the starry night sky. After being burned into nothingness, of course.
For some reason, maybe the wine, he doesn’t accept her response. He thinks he should explain, offer some reasons:
Its in the books you read/write.
Anxiety, murder, disappointment, heartbreak, betrayal…these things are in our books too, but we don’t want them in real life either. That’s why people read–to experience things in the imaginary part of the mind.
It’s so fucking hot in porn.
Hello? Everything looks better in porn. That’s why it generated 97 billion dollars last year. How about we not use porn as a standard for positive, sustainable behavior.
You won’t know unless you try it.
This is just childish. For example, consider cutting off your pinky finger. You don’t need to do that to know it is 1) a bad idea 2) very painful and 3) irreversible.
It’d just be the one time.
See directly above, childish, with the addition of why does that make any difference? I suppose that could be the strength of this reason, as it makes so little logical sense that there is no equivalent response.
Let’s just ask her, then decide if we want to go through with it. There’s no harm in asking.
First of all, that’s disrespecting her reply of no. Secondly, yes, there is harm in asking. In fact, he has already caused harm by asking. It’s this asking business that caused the initial complications and delivered that nasty basket of confusing emotions mentioned above.
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Her anger may be the easiest to decode and deal with. She’s mad because he ruined their night by being a disgusting asshole. She’s mad because he’s suggesting the Hot Friend is hotter than she is. Also reasonable–she’s mad that he was stupid enough to bring it up. WTF.
Hurt, while also terrible, is easy to sort thorough and understand–for her. She’s miserable that he doesn’t think she’s enough. Disappointed that he’s been eyeing, and thinking about, sex with not just other women…but a woman she herself has brought around him. When she tells him he has hurt her by suggesting this one-time-only-night-of-fun, he again makes a mistake.
He assumes his woman feels intimated by the Hot Friend and offers some reasons why she need not see herself as less than. The Hot Friend’s boobs aren’t really that great; one may be bigger than the other. When she smiles, you can see the crooked tooth on the lower left center of her jaw, and its kind of janky. She’s a slob…sometimes when she bends over the tops of her panties show. All these reasons makes things worse, hurting the woman partner more because all it does is reveal how carefully this guy has been studying the Hot Friend.
Disgust. This one is tricky. Confusing. Feeling this way may even make her feel guilty. After all, who feels disgusted by the idea of her friend’s body? Let’s skip over that question and hop to the last emotion because its there that the answer to this one lies.
Humiliation. This one is even trickier than disgust. More confusing. Why does she feel so much shame when he’s the one who has asked the question? Why does she feel crushing humiliation when she’s in the same room with the guy and her friend? After all, the three of them being together used to be the best time ever.
Shame comes from acts we’ve done but also from acts that have been done to us. ‘Good’ shame is the guilt we feel after we’ve done something we know we shouldn’t have. ‘Toxic’ shame comes from others; it occurs when we’ve been exposed in a way we weren’t prepared for or in a way that’s too intimate. So, when he asks her if she wants to do the 3-way with her Hot Friend, he’s crossed a boundary and pulled her along for the ride–whether she wanted to go or not. Without repair, the border that had been clearly around the two of them will remain unclear. Unclear = uncertain. Toxic shames also creates feelings of inadequacy. You don’t need me to tell you what doubt + insecurity equals.
Pretending ‘the question’ was never asked isn’t going to work. That’s one genie that’s not going back into the bottle. While only one person, in this case her, realizes it, there’s a crack in the foundation. What’s going to repair it? Probably, only more conversation. Will that work?
Have some thoughts? We’d love to hear them. Share ‘em in the comments.
*****
Isabelle Drake writes erotic romance, urban fantasy, horror and young adult thrillers. Her latest story, BAIT, features a woman who hunts and sells zombies, can be found in the horror anthology Gone With The Dead.
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January 8, 2018
Shipping Reylo: Adam Driver & A More Twisted Last Jedi
by Madeline Iva
Alexa Day had a fabulous blog post on The Last Jedi last Friday. Check it out. I just want to extend the convo a little here — cause The Last Jedi was the first Star Wars film I’ve actually liked since Empire Strikes Back. Not only was The Last Jedi more diverse and watchable than Return of the Jedi, and all the prequel episodes, it was far stronger, I thought, than The Force Awakens. Yes, it was still uneven – and see Alexa’s notes on the guy who says that kind of thing about your parents is not your friend. Real wisdom there.
But hey, you know where this post is going – and it’s not going to be all about the porgs—cute as they are.
First of all, don’t tell me Adam Driver is not hot. Second of all — don’t tell me in your twisted little heart you were less than happy that this unexpected Kylo Ren & Rey thing suddenly splashed across the screen.[image error]
REASONS TO SHIP REYLO:
SEXUAL TENSION IN STAR WARS: YES, PLEASE! When Kylo Ren started to connect with Rey I sat up in my seat and was like: hey now! This movie is starting to come alive.
HE’S THE MOST INTERESTING CHARACTER IN THE WHOLE MOVIE: I mean, come on–Finn, Poe & Rey? Yawn. (Poe is a tragic waste of Oscar Isaacs if you ask me). I thought so in The Force Awakens and even more so in The Last Jedi. The sign of a really good actor is one who fills up an only mediocre role with charisma and emotion. Adam Driver is doing just that–and the other guys aren’t. He’s filling Kylo Ren with emotional intensity. And so what if he draws with colors outside the Crayola Machismo Box? So they’re calling him emo. Fine. Fine. I don’t care! He’s got his issues, okay? In The Last Jedi we find out exactly what one of those compelling issues is–and it’s pretty compelling.
REY IS FAR MORE INTERESTING WITH THIS COMPLICATION: Frankly, she needs the assist. She upped her game big time by bouncing off Kylo Ren. In fact, Poe and Finn could use some of that edgy-sexy-emo assist too. Almost everyone in the rebel camp could use some help in being more interesting. Everyone except the porgs–they were totally holding their own.
YOU TOTALLY WANT TO SEE KYLO REDEEMED, DON’T YOU? During the film, Kylo Ren is so on the cusp of falling over into the good side you can taste it: nom nom nom!
GIVE ME A GOOD ANTI-HERO ANY DAY. They seem like they’re cranking up the works for some kind of intimate, doomed romance between Rey and Kylo Ren–and I am all over that sh*t. Let’s hope there’s some sex that happens between them, even if it’s far too late for full on redemption and he’ll have to die or something…
In the end—I will dream my little dream that Finn and Poe get their edgy, forbidden, sexual no-no encounter as well. Why not?
Let’s say Finn is caught by the evil empire, put through retraining by Captain Phasma, and that they get together in some terribly twisted way.
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You know Captain Phasma–she’s Brie from GOT.
Meanwhile, Poe and the doomed Vice Admiral Holdo (Laura Dern) found time for a very short, very fraught and heated sexual tryst that wound up on the cutting room floor.[image error][image error]
BEYOND REYLO:
But if you really REALLY want to grab me by the scruff of the neck and never let me go — then after Kylo and Rey don’t work out, let’s ship Kylo Ren and General Hux. Domhnall Gleeson is another great actor who’s coming up less than in his role. Let say Kylo Ren startles General Hux one day by stating there’s always been some chemistry between them, and it’s finally time to not only admit it, but to start exploring it. That would scare the whiney out of Hux. Then just let them go at it. Now that I’d pay some good money to see.
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General Hux, Kylo Ren, and Captain Phasma
Madeline Iva is the twisted sister you always wish you had. She’s also the author of the fantasy romance Wicked Apprentice. Check out her other Lady Smut posts, Join her newsletter or follow her on Facebook, twitter, and Pinterest. [image error]
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January 7, 2018
Sexy Sunday Snippet: Burn by Dawn Altieri
Happy New Year! This Sunday we have a bit from Burn, Book 1 in Dawn Altieri’s Romance in Ridgeport’s series.
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Book blurb:
Falling for him is playing with fire…
Chloe Addison is on the verge of a promising career in real estate development until an explosion destroys her first major project and casts suspicion on her in an arson investigation. Her career is suddenly at risk—and possibly her life.
Firefighter Ryan Monroe wants a spot on the arson team, and getting close to Chloe might be the best way to solve his first investigation. Despite a painful past of his own, Ryan has dedicated himself to saving people, and when he realizes Chloe is in danger, she’s no exception. He just might be the perfect guy to rescue her, but their attraction could bring them both down in flames.
Book excerpt:
Ryan was greeted by a loud shout of “Surprise!” from the members of the firehouse, some of whom weren’t even on shift. Black, red, and gold balloons created a centerpiece on the dining table next to a chocolate-frosted sheet cake, fully ablaze with birthday candles. Even Max sported a cone-shaped paper birthday hat.
Ryan barely saw any of it. His attention was fixed on Chloe, standing at the far end of the long table in a white blouse and a gray skirt and the high heels he loved because when she wore them, he didn’t have to bend quite so far to kiss her. Her long hair fell in loose waves around that beautiful face he couldn’t get enough of. He went straight to her as the guys broke out in a rousing—though horrendously off-key—rendition of “Happy Birthday.”
He planted his hands on her waist. “You did this?” he asked.
She gripped his arms and shrugged with a mischievous smile.
He dipped her backward and pressed his mouth over hers, eliciting hoots and catcalls from the rest of the crew.
“Come on,” Sullivan yelled. “Are we gonna have to turn the hoses on you two? Blow out these candles before we have to get our gear out.”
Ryan pulled Chloe back to her feet with a laugh and threw his arm around her before leaning over the cake and extinguishing the flames. He turned and kissed her again.
“Look at that, I got my wish,” he said. He gazed down at her—mesmerized by those huge green eyes—and marveled at the way she’d seamlessly worked her way in among the crew at the firehouse. She belonged here. The realization might have hit him like a punch in the gut if it hadn’t felt so damned right.
Cooper gave Ryan a slap on the back. “This one’s a keeper, buddy.”
Ryan chuckled, still staring dreamily at Chloe. “Yes, she is.”
He pulled out a chair for her as the crew settled in at the table for a batch of Cooper’s five-alarm chili. “Can you stay for a while?”
Before she could answer or take a seat, Jeremy appeared at Ryan’s side. “Go borrow my office, dude.”
Ryan caught the look of confusion on Chloe’s face that must have rivaled his own. “What are you talking about?”
Jeremy frowned and rolled his eyes impatiently. “It’s your birthday and your girlfriend’s here. Go borrow my office.”
Ryan glanced at Chloe and then swept an observant glance around the room. The crew was much more interested in lunch than they were in what he and Chloe were up to. She giggled at his side, seemingly ready to go along with whatever he decided.
She was perfect.
He grinned wickedly as he grabbed her hand, and she let out a little gasp before he led her to the stairs and the administrative department on the third floor. As the door to Jeremy’s office swung closed behind them, he cupped her face in his hands for an unrelenting kiss. He reached over to lock the door before doing it again.
“I thought he was joking,” she said, breaking away from him. “Are you sure this is safe?”
“A firehouse is one of the safest places you can be, babe.” His mouth crashed over hers once more, and his tongue claimed victory as he eased her backward and lifted her onto Jeremy’s desk.
She laughed, the sound muffled by his kiss. “What if someone comes in?”
“Door’s locked,” he whispered as he slid his lips to her neck. “You didn’t have to do that, you know. The whole party thing.”
“I know I didn’t have to do it.” A sigh escaped her as he teased the delicate skin below her ear, and she clung to his waist to steady herself. “I wanted to.”
He slipped his fingers beneath her sweater, running them over the warm skin of her back. Her body arched toward his chest and she thrust her hands into his hair.
God, he loved it when she did that.
“Should I even ask how you pulled that off?”
“Jeremy,” she replied with another little gasp when he popped the clasp of her bra.
“Jeremy helped me. I had him send me a text when you were on your way back from your last call. I brought the balloons and the cake, but he got everyone in on it.”
He chuckled as his tongue traced her collarbone, her skin vibrating beneath him with a soft moan. He hiked her skirt up and pushed between her legs, with his knees bent to give him the right angle to grind against her core.
“Are you sure about this?” she asked. “What if you get called to a fire?”
He leaned back, his eyes raking over her as he prepared to devour her. “Let it burn.”
*****
Get your copy of Burn now: On , from Barnes and Noble, or direct from Entangled.
*****
With an overactive imagination and a slightly twisted mind, Dawn Altieri has been scribbling stories practically since birth. When she’s not curled up on the sofa with her laptop, her latest story, a box of chocolates and a cup of tea (or a glass of wine, depending on the time of day), she can be found volunteering in the world of animal rescue. She shares her home with her husband and daughter, and a menagerie of rescued fur-babies.
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January 6, 2018
Sexy Saturday Round Up
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From Madeline:
From Slutever: The RuPaul alum Trixie & Katya serve up a radical wild webseries. Check it out!
Russia’s first Female Muslim Presidential candidate.
Orgiastic geeks? Oh yes.
Ready for 2018? How to make a pussy bow.
Shondaland crossover—coming your way!
The post Sexy Saturday Round Up appeared first on Lady Smut.
January 5, 2018
After the Fire: Where The Last Jedi Takes Us
Behold Domnhall Gleeson, unhuxed in The Revenant. I just thought you should see that.
By Alexa Day
Where do I start with The Last Jedi?
I spent a little while, probably longer than I should have, trying to figure out exactly what I wanted to say about the latest cinematic installment in the mighty Star Wars franchise. Star Wars isn’t my family the way that Star Trek is, but the giant chord that gives way to the opening crawl still gives me goosebumps after all these years. My affection for the characters and the story runs deep enough to make me protective. I want the best for the series. So when I challenge the filmmakers to do better, I try to do so firmly but lovingly.
I loved The Last Jedi. It’s challenging an audience that needs to be challenged. It takes us into a darkness more subtle than its predecessors have shown us. Despair and hopelessness settle over these characters like a chill in a damp room. We’re restored to light and hope by the end of the movie, but there are a couple of places along the way that bother me.
And so, firmly but lovingly, let’s start with those places.
It’s all spoilers after this Tweet from Emo Kylo Ren.
hey girl am i a Death Star
because i feel like you should keep trying to rebuild me in spite of my obvious flaws and the lives i’ve destroyed
— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 17, 2017
Still here? I know. Kylo Ren has problems. We will address that in a moment.
First, let me join the long, long line of people delighted to see so many women in The Last Jedi. Star Wars has always been reasonably friendly to women in leadership for the Rebels, but the Empire and First Order have kind of been boys’ clubs until now. In The Last Jedi, I saw women working desk jobs for the First Order, down in the trenches working the switchboards with the buttons and the blinky lights. They call to mind a lot of women we know — working a crap job for a giant corporation because that’s how you keep the bills paid.
The First Order’s highest ranking woman actually appeared in the preceding movie. Captain Phasma made quite an impression in The Force Awakens, with her blinged-out Stormtrooper armor. In the giant corporation that is the First Order, Phasma is like so many of us out here toughing it out on the day job. She’s better than the drama that Supreme Leader Snoke uses to keep Kylo Ren and General Hux circling around each other, and she knows it. She’s not just trying to avoid the Disciplinary Chokey-Doke ™. She’s about getting her job done because that’s what effective leaders do. But all that hard work isn’t getting her the attention she deserves. The First Order rewards drama a lot faster than hard work. Raise your hand if that sounds like your job beneath the great ceiling of glass.
I want to see more of the woman in the gleaming armor (with a red-trimmed cape, no less), so I hope Finn didn’t succeed in killing her. I’m approaching this question the way I would approach it in a soap opera — no one is dead until there’s been an open-casket funeral and the box is in the hole. But Star Wars killed off Darth Maul just as he was becoming the most interesting character in his film. They’ve taken out characters with strong potential before. I was just hoping not to see that mistake more than once.
girl am i a hyperdrive
because im broken and i think you should stay here and fix me instead of whatever else it was you had planned
— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 21, 2017
There is apparently a movement to ship Kylo Ren and Rey. That actually makes sense to me on one level. Over the years, I’ve had many, many friends who wanted to set me up with the only other black person they knew because we “have so much in common.” Sticking Kylo Ren together with Rey makes the same kind of sense, and it promises to have the same kind of results. The fact that Kylo Ren and Rey are both strong in the Force is not enough to build a dinner date on, much less a relationship. Kylo Ren and Rey are both living in a vacuum right now, so they can’t see that.
But I do. I see it.
Before I saw the movie, one of the spoilers that slipped through to me was that the mystery of Rey’s parents would be solved at last. I like Rey, so I was a little curious about who her parents are. I didn’t think Luke Skywalker would repeat the cycle of well intentioned abandonment that marked his own childhood. But who else could her parents be? Who else did I know?
Somehow I got to the end of the film with no answers. Concerned that I had missed something, I turned reluctantly to the Internet. At what point had the mystery of Rey’s parents been solved?
The answer was unexpected.
Rey’s parents were nobodies from nowhere who sold their child to get a fix and were later buried in a shallow, unmarked grave, forgotten by a world that was better off without them. We know that, the Internet says, because Kylo Ren says so.
He did say that, yes. I remember. I’m just surprised anyone believes him.
Sit down with your Aunt Alexa for a moment. This is important.
Kylo Ren — who needs to keep a shirt on at all times because the unnatural pallor of that poorly defined torso is not sexy at all, pookie — is lying to Rey. I think a lot of you have been told a lie just like this. I thought you knew it was a lie, but now I’m not so sure. So I want to help you out.
A person who cares about you will not tell you that you are nobody from nowhere who came from nothing. He will not do that even if he knows it to be true. He will not do that even if you know it to be true. He will definitely not do that if he knows this is something that bothers you. This is not to say that he will run along behind you, polishing your ego. Not at all. He might not constantly sing your praises to the mountains — but he will not tell you that you are insignificant, or that any part of your identity is insignificant.
You know who does tell you that you’re nobody?
That predictable, played-out lie is the trademark of a man who has figured out (a) that you are out of his league and (b) that you have not yet discovered this. You are nobody from nowhere who came from nothing, and you have no significance at all … except to me. Your Aunt Alexa and most of your friends can all name one useless dude who tried it with them because he had nothing to offer and he knew it. He probably needed to keep all his clothes on, too.
I hear some of you out there. But Vader —
It’s true that Darth Vader also gave Luke Skywalker some unwanted news about his parents. That situation was very different. For one thing, Vader was telling Luke the truth. His information was about as reliable as it gets. Vader was also trying to get Luke on the same side of the Force. Vader was trying to lift Luke up with him, using the truth. Kylo Ren is trying to drag Rey down with a lie.
I love you because we’re the same is a very different message from you can’t leave because you don’t have anything else. If you don’t hear me say anything else today, I need you to hear that.
dear diary
i stood around all day shirtless and covered in oil in case i got an unexpected call but unfortunately i didn’t
— Emo Kylo Ren (@KyloR3n) December 19, 2017
The long road from farm boy to Jedi Knight to Jedi Master has not been kind to Luke Skywalker. His decision to follow Obi-Wan brought him to the highest point in his life, a place of meaning and purpose and fulfillment and enlightment. And then the bottom fell out, and the way of the Jedi cost Luke everything he had. This is the Luke who greets us at the beginning of the film.
Mark Hamill said, at one point, that he was opposed to where director Rian Johnson was taking his character. “[A] Jedi doesn’t give up,” Hamill said. The idea that Luke would find himself in such a dark place, no matter the circumstances, was simply unthinkable.
That really spoke to me. Because I am not in a place emotionally to hear from someone who never gives up. I’m tired. I’ve given up. And the idea that I would find myself in such a dark place was once unthinkable to me, too.
In a film filled with strong and vulnerable and multi-dimensional female characters, I saw myself most clearly in Luke. He doesn’t want to be involved in anyone’s spiritual transformation anymore. He wants to be left the hell alone and leave other people the hell alone in return. When I saw Luke hiking up to the Venerable Jedi Tree with a good old-fashioned firebomb in one hand, I pumped my fist. I don’t need another cheerleader. I need a good old-fashioned firebomb and a venerable target at which to hurl it.
Yoda’s appearance, just as Luke is about to let that firebomb fly, turns the film away from its slow but inexorable march into the dark. Yoda being Yoda, he does this in a way that feels backwards to the rest of us. He doesn’t stop Luke from burning down the tree. He starts the fire himself.
It raises an important set of questions.
When the tree is gone, Luke will remain. Who is he now, in the ashes? What will he do now that he’s closed the door on his past?
What will he make of his freedom from the order and structure that informed his entire life?
It’s a big question. Luke finds an answer in his most defining moment, before he truly passes the torch to Rey.
That question is out there for all of us. Who will we be after Burning It All Down? What will we do in the ashes?
I didn’t need a cheerleader or someone who never gives up, but dammit, I needed that question. I needed that as much as I needed to Burn It All Down. I think Hamill saw that for himself, too, because he walked back his doubts about the film and his character upon further consideration.
I don’t think fandom is entirely ready for all that. Not right away. There’s a reason AMC Theatres felt they needed to warn people that the interval of silence in the middle of the story was intentional and not a defect in the sound system. Some people aren’t ready, and some of them won’t be ready for a long time.
But are you? Are you ready to consider who you actually are, without the identity and the structure you’ve been trying to grow into?
Isn’t it worth asking?
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Alexa Day is the USA Today bestselling author of erotica and erotic romance with heroines who are anything but innocent. In her fictional worlds, strong, smart women discover excitement, adventure, and exceptional sex. A former bartender, one-time newspaper reporter, and licensed attorney, she likes her stories with just a touch of the inappropriate, and her literary mission is to stimulate the intellect and libido of her readers.
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January 1, 2018
New Year, New Man, New Approach
[image error]By Elizabeth Shore
Happy new year, Sexies! Candles are all blown out on the old year and we’ve lit them brightly for the new one. Adios 2017. Helloooo 2018. How ya doin?
If you’re anything like me, when the commercials come on for whatever TV marathon stuff-your-face-while-in-jammies fest you happen to be watching on new year’s day, you start to ponder. What will the new year bring? New job? New book contract? New slim body? New president?? (one can dream). Or, if you’re like one of my very best girlfriends, hope springs eternal for a new man in the new year.
For many the new year is time for change, which makes it the opportune moment to shed that frustrating loser you’ve been dating and get yourself a real man. Sound familiar? If so, you’re not alone. Onine dating sites see anywhere from a 20 to 60 percent spike in usage during the first month of the year. But for my girlfriend, whom I’ll call Destiny, looking for a new man isn’t just something she does as the calendar turns to January. It’s what she does throughout the year, every year.
Destiny wants love more than she wants health insurance (she has none, but don’t tell), or money (very little), or any other fill-in-the-blank aspirational juggernaut that many of us strive for. Not my Destiny. Forget that other nonsense! Her hope, above all else, is to find her soulmate. Her lover. Her man. The guy with whom she can laugh, and grow old, and love above all others. In her heart of hearts she believes he’s out there; she just has to find him. There is one little catch, however, Destiny’s pool of candidates is pretty selective. It’s not the whole xy 35-55 age range across the globe type deal. Oh, no. Oh, hell no. Destiny’s future man must be tall, dark, and handsome. Literally. ‘Cause for her forever man, she’ll only consider African American guys. Why? It’s who she’s physically attracted to.
Trust me, I get the attraction thing. Let’s say you’re sitting with your besties at a bar and two hot dudes walk in. One’s a tall, fit, blond Swedish-type guy, and the other’s his equal except he’s Latin. Who ya gonna choose? Or maybe it’s more accurate to say, who’s nature gonna choose for you? We all have our types, right? And we can’t help who we’re attracted to, right? It’s nature!
Well, hold on there, pardner. The good folks at Psychology Today have something to say about that. Evolution definitely plays a part in desire. Statistically speaking, men are drawn toward women who appear fertile. Emphasis on appear. Even if your childbearing days are far in the rearview mirror, looking young and youthful – as marketers in the $64 billion annual revenue of the U.S. cosmetics industry are quick to point out – is a must for attracting a mate. The same is true for women toward men. Statistically speaking, we’re far more attracted to strong men who seem like they can provide and protect. It’s evolutionary, my dear.
But what about that whole “type” thing? The fact that Destiny will only consider African American guys. I admire her eternal optimism, but it does seem as if she’s vastly limiting her prospects, no? What if she met a ginger, average height, average looks, but super funny and a fabulous supporter and provider guy, for whom kids and family are equally important for him as they are for her? If she writes him off without a speck of consideration there’s every danger she’s missing out on an amazing future mate.
The Psychology Today article I read, “Laws of Attraction,” states that when people state they have a type, what they really mean is they have a “preference.” You’d prefer a brunette to a blond, for example, if you could paint a picture of your ultimate guy. But being stuck on a type limits your opportunity for love. Instead, advises Psychology Today, date yourself out of it. Broaden your range. Take chances. Consider potential partners who don’t at first glance make you swoon. What they might do, in the long run, is make you fall in love.
So cheers to 2018 and to expanding our worlds. I’ll drink to that. Happy new year, everyone!
Elizabeth Shore writes contemporary and historical erotic romance. She’s the author of Hot Bayou Nights, Desire Rising, The Lady Smut Book of Dark Desires and (as Liz Madison) Season of Splendor and With His Promise. Her next release, Hot Bayou Fire, the second in the Bayou series, will be out in 2018. Release date announced as soon as it’s known.
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