Phillip Van Hooser's Blog: Build Performance Blog, page 11

Say Yes: An Overlooked Success Strategy

Most people want to be reasonably successful however they might define it. A lot of people are well on their way while some are struggling for strategies to help them succeed. Sometimes the most effective approach is right under our nose, hiding in plain sight. We’ve just disregarded it or intentionally overlooked it. This one success strategy may be THE one that propels you forward in ways you couldn’t have imagined possible. I know it did for me. Let’s take a look at the simple strategy I call, SAY YES.

Say Yes: An Overlooked Success Strategy

Several years ago, I was spending some time with my buddy, Joe Calloway, a fellow professional speaker. Joe is a tremendous speaker and author (his books include Never By Chance and The Leadership Mindset), not to mention he’s one of the most likable guys I know. One of the many reasons I like him so is that he always makes me think, whether he intends to or not.

During this particular conversation, Joe arrested my attention and captured my imagination. Though I’ve long since forgotten the context in which the line was delivered, I doubt I’ll ever forget the line itself. Joe simply said, “If it scares me professionally, I do it.”

That statement initially grabbed me as a sort of counterintuitive musing — a thought that ended up being the opposite of what I would have expected from him. But the more I thought about it, the more I found myself agreeing with a larger principle contained in the statement.

From that conversation with Joe, a success strategy I had overlooked emerged for me. That strategy is to simply say yes.

Like most of my success choices, this one is rather simple in concept. However, it has far-reaching implications. Here’s how it goes. Whenever someone approaches me with an idea, an opportunity, an invitation, or a suggestion, I immediately try to find a legitimate reason to say yes.

If someone says to me, “Phil, I would like to discuss something with you over lunch,” I would like to pitch an idea your way,” I would like to get your input on making something work,” or I would like to get you involved somehow,” I immediately start trying to figure how I might say yes to this person.

Now, before you start rolling your eyes and thinking I’m a complete idiot or someone with more time on my hands than I know what to do with, take a minute to consider my reasoning. Believe it or not, there is a method in my madness. I do have standards, so let me address them.

Reasons Not to Say YesI will take time to listen to and consider only contacts from people I know and with whom I have an established relationship. Or those who find their way to me from a respected, shared connection. In other words, I’m not interested in taking a call from a stranger who got my number from a directory or who is offering me a “once-in-a-lifetime” investment opportunity. I can guarantee that would be a very short conversation.Even if I know or know of them some way, I’ll spend very little time with individuals who appear to be self-absorbed. You know the type. They’re more interested in talking about themselves and their own personal interests than the opportunity, idea, invitation or cause they say they represent. Such people turn me off. And my conversations with them are bound to end quickly too.I have little time for people to whom I’ve already said “no.” While my overarching intent is to say “yes” whenever possible and practical, I will say “no” from time to time. And if I’ve processed the request and already decided to pass, I really don’t want to repeat or explain my reasoning again.I will most certainly offer a quick and definitive “no” to anyone bringing something to my attention that doesn’t align with my personal values, beliefs or standards. Those foundations are in my life for a reason — and they’re not something I hastily change. That includes any requests I view as illegal, immoral, unethical or highly impractical. And includes anything that conflicts with my personal or professional commitments.

When you must say “no,” use these tips to do it positively and keep the door open for future opportunities.

Benefits From Saying Yes

Saying yes can lead to some extraordinarily exciting discoveries, adventures and opportunities. Imagine the benefits to come from…

Saying yes to a project assignment. Who might you meet? What might you learn? What skills might you build?

Saying yes to be mentored by another professional in your industry. When might you need a connection, an introduction or an advocate?

Saying yes to a volunteer leadership role. Who might you help? How might your perspectives change? How might you grow?

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What Scares You?

Let’s face it. Most of what scares us does so because it’s new or unfamiliar to us. As I pointed out in my book, Leaders Ought to Know, “unfamiliar experiences are breeding grounds for new fears.”

But Former First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt once advised, “Do one thing every day that scares you.”

So what scares you? Spend some time thinking about that. And once you have, would you be willing to say yes to at least considering the next opportunity that comes your way?

You may be surprised how this one simple, overlooked success strategy propels you.

What other unexpected strategies have you used to grow your success? Please share!

 

This book is PACKED with success strategies you can put into play TODAY!
Get a copy here —  success is waiting for you!

 

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3 Tips to Build Confidence

In order for you to build your confidence, you have to take correct, calculated, and consistent action. What actions should you take? Here are three practical tips!

3 Tips to Build Confidence

Does confidence feel like the answer or missing link between you and your goals? I believe some people are built naturally confident, other people must work to build confidence. As someone who has worked to build my own confidence,  I’ve learned over time that confidence is more of a mindset than a feeling. When you set your mind right, you’ll start thinking and acting differently — more confidently.  I’m a very practical person, so today I want to share with you three tips I’ve used to build my own confidence. I think they’ll help you, too!

1-Become the Expert

You can be confident and stupid, or you can be confident and an expert. A confident expert wins.

Joseph Allen Maldonado-Passage, AKA “Joe Exotic”, AKA “The Tiger King” (documentary on Netflix), was confident, to say the least. But he was also stupid. He made many bad decisions and now has a 22-year sentence in prison. Confident and stupid.

Jeff Bezos (CEO of Amazon) launched 2-day shipping for Amazon Prime members in 2005. It was a risk, so he did his homework then moved forward confidently. He completely changed the retail and shipping game. Confident and an expert.

At work, look at the people around you, below you, and above you. Evaluate their knowledge. Become the expert on what they don’t know, but need to know. When you do that, for starters, you’ll make yourself invaluable to the organization. Secondly, creating expertise crushes fears. When you’ve worked to truly become the expert, then you’re less likely to be afraid to speak up about it. You build confidence when you become the expert. Side bonus, you’ll create opportunities for yourself. People will come looking for you so they can put your knowledge and skills to good work.

2-Focus on Them, Not You

If you’re feeling shy or intimidated, you’re making it about yourself. You’re worrying about what they think about your age, experience, past mistakes, your outfit, whatever! Shift your focus to them, not you. Focus on the fact that if you’re the expert, they need what you know. Show up and serve others. That’s what leaders should be doing at all times anyway!

3-Get Moving

Knees weak, palms sweaty, heart racing right before your big moment? What do you do? Move! You’re likely in “fight or flight” mode so give yourself a release.

I remember heading upstairs to my first bank board meeting to present to them a project I had been working on. Five minutes before the meeting, there wasn’t a dry spot on my body and I felt weak all over. I was incredibly nervous, anxious, you fill in the blank! As I started up the stairs, I checked off the boxes: Am I the expert on this topic? Yes. Do they need and will they benefit from this information? Yes. All the jitters were still there. So, when I got to the top of the stairs, I turned around, walked down, and walked back up. Then I did it again. And again. Finally at the top for the third time, I was a little out of breath, but my nerves were so much more chill.

Before your big moment, move. It’s good for your body, mind, soul, and confident appearance.

What Happens Next?

If you want to build confidence, choose to become the expert, focus on helping others instead of yourself, and take action regardless of your inhibitions. The internal feelings of confidence you desire to have, they will come with time. As you keep showing up confidently — even if you don’t feel confident yet — each additional experience will help you become more confident in yourself. Eventually, you’ll feel it.  And, the more you show up and add value to other people, they will start becoming more confident in you, too. So, it’s time to get to work to become a more confident YOU!

Let’s learn from each other — what do you do to help calm nerves and increase your confidence? Share in the comments!

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Leadership Vision: 4 Steps to Create Yours

I often ask clients and audience members to share leadership  traits they value. Predictably, many mention leadership vision. And rightfully so. The dictionary defines vision as, “the ability to think about or plan the future with imagination and wisdom.” Certainly, thinking, planning, imagination and wisdom are valuable characteristics for leaders. Yet, for me, a second, and better definition of vision is this: “a vivid mental image of what the future will or could be.” Let’s look into how you can create a “vivid mental image” of the leader you want to be.

The Problem With a Lack of Leadership Vision

First a disclaimer. This is NOT some 21st Century, pop psychology. Leadership vision is NOT a new concept.

For example, the Biblical Book of Proverbs was written more than three thousand years ago. And it is often referred to as the “Book of Wisdom.” It records a succinct, yet powerful warning against a lack of vision, provided by wise King Solomon himself.

“Where there is no vision,” Solomon declared, “the people perish.” Proverbs Chapter 29, Verse 18 (King James Version).

How’s that for a sobering thought…

People — and by extension the countries, organizations and cultures they represent — are ultimately doomed to perish — CEASE, COLLAPSE, DISAPPEAR ENTIRELY — for lack of a vision.

Is that overstated? I don’t think so.

Who’s Responsible for Leadership Vision?

So who exactly is responsible for creating and communicating vision? Leaders, that’s who! You and me.

I shudder at the thought of being in a leadership position, only to watch the individuals and organizations I’ve been called to lead, fade into oblivion, due to my failure to supply a “vivid mental image” of where we’re going or how to get there.

I’m not willing to let that happen. And I don’t want it to happen to you either. So, here’s what I propose. I propose we begin — you and I — right now, right where we are, to do all that we can.

Aligning Vision with Perspective

And the first thing we can do is align vision with personal perspective.

Remember, vision is developing a vivid mental image of what the future will or could be. But perspective is understanding the relative importance of current things, tempered with the ability to apply a sense of proportion.

Or said more directly, we must begin by acknowledging the things we can control instead of blaming the things we can’t.

Too often, I hear people openly complain about the failings and shortcomings of governments, suppliers, superiors, peers and subordinates. Yet these very same folks conveniently overlook or dismiss entirely, their ability to change and control the mindset and habits which impact their performance and interaction with those same people.

4 Steps to Create Your Leadership Vision

So I ask you to embrace the following visioning exercise.

Ask yourself: As a leader, what specific skills do I want to possess?Brainstorm and blue-sky a very “vivid mental image” of what your leadership would look like played out. Think like a child — no limitations, instead explore imaginative “what if-ing.”Add perspective… What can I do? What do I need help on?Look around and be aware… Who does this well and can help me get better?

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Here’s an example.

Personally, I’ve always placed great value on truthfulness, candor and direct communication in leaders.

So, years ago I created my leadership vision, my “vivid mental image,” of what being truthful, candid and openly communicative looks like to me. Then I stopped to consider perspective. I realized I couldn’t do everything — but I could do something.

So I purposefully looked around to identify people who were admittedly better — more fully developed — in these particular skills sets than I. And I began to watch and study them carefully.

At first, from afar, but eventually, I approached and engaged them in conversation about how they did what they did so well — and what advice they might have for me.

I challenge you to find someone who is better at what you envision yourself being great at and begin the intentional process of learning from them.

(Leadership seem to be a never-ending struggle these days? These 3 tips can help.)

Low Risk, High Reward

It’s a low risk, high reward activity to help you begin establishing your personal leadership vision, while embracing the perspective and opportunities currently present.

Remember, when your vision is crystal clear, the decisions you make and the paths you take will always be easier.

Now, go get started!

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Let’s talk about your plans…SOON!!

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Wow Them with Your Weakness

Many leaders still believe in the never let them see you sweat mentality. And there are situations where I’d agree. But, at other times, it could be a leader’s vulnerability that starts the shift toward progress in an organization.

Wow Them with Your Weakness

Many leaders still believe in the never let them see you sweat mentality. And there are situations where I’d agree. But, at other times, it could be a leader’s vulnerability that starts the shift toward progress in an organization.

I was working with an organization that was trying to build a stronger culture of unity and teamwork. From my observations, the disconnect between leaders and employees in that organization was just big enough that major progress towards their culture goal had been stalled for years.

In order for a culture shift to happen in an organization, the heaviest responsibility falls on leaders to be the example of the new expectation.

Beth, a key leader on the team, was unmatched when it came to technical skills, but her people skills were lacking. The way she interacted with some employees — or didn’t interact at all with other employees — set the example that a unified team was nice in theory, but wasn’t something leadership actually wanted on a daily basis. Some employees said she was one to “talk the talk, but didn’t walk the walk”. What we know is that people do what people see. Hence why progress towards the organization’s culture transformation was gridlocked.

The interesting thing is that Beth knew her weakness regarding interpersonal skills. (Typically, it takes a while to get people to accurately see their own weaknesses!) Beth told me straight up that she was uncomfortable talking to people one-on-one that she didn’t know well. And because it would make her so anxious, she avoided going to certain departments in the organization or would only make time for a really quick drop by to say hello. Employees felt she was not personable and didn’t seem to really want the unified culture of teamwork they’d heard her talk about so often. This seems like such a small thing, but in leader/employee relationships, it’s the small things that mean everything.

The dynamics of the leader/employee relationship are critical in all cases, but especially when you are working to shift to a stronger teamwork culture. Beth had to do something about her interpersonal skills weakness. It was exactly the largest stone blocking the organization’s path to reaching their goal.

After careful planning, Beth agreed to admit her weakness to the entire team. Why would she do this?  Here are 3 reasons:

Be the Self-Awareness Example

We all have strengths and weaknesses. Understanding those characteristics is key to individual and team success.

As a leader, try as you might to hide it, it’s likely that everyone else already knows your weaknesses. You admitting your weakness is not news to them, but it is showing them that you’re not oblivious.

Admitting your weakness validates what they think they’ve known for a while and shows you actually are self-aware. This gives you an opportunity to set the example for your people to also recognize their weaknesses and intentionally improve their performance, too.

Earn Yourself Grace

People are more likely to extend grace to you when they know you’re working to get better at something. Beth was uncomfortable talking with people she didn’t know. She admitted it. So, when she came around and tried to start up a conversation with someone – even if it was awkward at first – they showed her grace and simply loved that she was trying! They also struck up good working conversations with Beth because they knew that was her area of weakness. How do I know this? They told me!

Admitting your weakness may not be easy for you. It’s a humbling step to take. But when you’re humble, you earn grace from people. You earn the opportunity to show up in a way that might not be perfect, but people will give you the benefit of the doubt and reward you for trying by giving their respect, loyalty, and extending grace going forward.

As things change in your organization, mistakes will happen. To continue to make forward progress, showing grace to one another is key to creating an environment where people can try and succeed, but they can also try and fail-up.

Make Them Say Wow

Oftentimes leaders try to keep up with an expectation that they must be polished, pretty, and perfect. But to be honest, that doesn’t impress many people these days. People want real!

You can wow people with your weakness. Admitting your weaknesses shows that you are not perfect — no one is.  Your employees won’t think you’re weak because they no longer see you as perfect. Instead, they’ll think wow…you’re self-aware, humble, brave, an example of who they want to follow, and a leader to get behind.

Turn Over a New Leaf

Just as I expected, after that tough conversation on Beth’s part, progress really began to pick up in the organization. It’s true…humble, self-aware people who communicate well and set the example for what they expect will always be the leaders with the highest likelihood of achieving success. Maybe it’s time, maybe you have a reason strong enough to finally let them see you sweat. As a leader, it could be one of the best decisions you make.

Do you admire humble leaders? Let me know in the comments!

Want to improve your organization’s culture? We can help! Let’s talk!

 

#leadershipdevelopment #leadershipculture #vanhooser #emergingleaderdevelopment #culturetransformation #leadershipstrategist #leadershipconsultant #leadershiptrainingcompany

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6 Inexcusable Leadership Flaws

We have a whole section in our leadership development training we call “unpardonable sins of leadership.” These leadership flaws are the actions and attributes that so obviously hamper good leadership that many people find them inexcusable. Take a couple minutes and do a self-check, your leadership reputation is worth it.

Inexcusable Leadership Flaws: The “Bad 6”IncompetenceInsensitivityIndifferenceInconsistencyLack of self-disciplineIneffective communication1. Incompetent Leadership

Incompetence is an inability to perform. From a leadership standpoint, it can be not understanding what you’re doing. Or worse still, some incompetent leaders think they know what they are doing and they are doing it well. While in reality, they are doing anything but.

Incompetence is probably the easiest of the leadership flaws to overcome. In essence, incompetence is a form of ignorance, defined as a lack of information, knowledge or understanding. So those leaders willing to learn and grow have the best chance for overcoming this leadership flaw.

I often illustrate a success mindset using a triangle. I call it the “triangle of success” because it has three important elements. On the left side of the triangle is “knowledge.” The right side of the triangle is “skill.” But the most important element is the foundation of the triangle. And that element is “attitude.” (Here’s what the “triangle of success” looks like.)

By increasing knowledge (or understanding) as well as increasing skill (the application of understanding), incompetence can be reduced. But it all rests on attitude (or desire).

What is your attitude? Are you willing to apply yourself to learn, grow and get better?

2. Insensitivity

Being insensitive to the needs of other people is a huge leadership flaw. A part of engaged leadership is rooted in caring for those we lead. If care for others is lacking or absent, then we’re not really leading. Instead, we’re driving them, manipulating them, or simply managing them. But we’re not leading them.

Trusted leaders have an authentic level of sensitivity, compassion and concern for their people. When they see or sense someone is going through something, they don’t ignore it. Here’s a quick example.

Let’s say you have a sensitivity to people who are isolated or neglected. Whether they ever mention it, you see it or you sense it. But this awareness is not enough.  You choose to act on your awareness of this person’s isolation.

In the mind of those around you, taking action is an act of leadership.  While inaction is the same as unawareness or insensitivity.

How can they know you’re aware unless you act?

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3. Indifference

While insensitivity is a lack of awareness, indifference means, “I see or sense it, but I don’t really care.” Indifferences says, “that’s not my problem.” Or “I have a lot of other, more pressing issues I’m responsible for.” In essence, the indifferent leader priorities their needs over the needs of the people they lead.

The leadership flaw of indifference may also point to a greater disconnect between the leader and their people.

4. Inconsistency

Inconsistent behavior. If the people you lead can’t predict your actions and reactions, then frankly, they are constantly confused. Employees want consistency and predictability.

Consistent behavior is a strange and powerful leadership force. So much so, that even if a leader is consistently bad, people can adapt and adjust to those behaviors.

Regarding this leadership flaw, I’ve often said (tongue-in-cheek) to leaders, “If you’re going to be a jerk, be a jerk all the time!” At least your people know how you are day in and day out and they can adjust their behavior to yours.

But with inconsistent behavior, people can’t predict, adapt or adjust because they are never certain how the leader will react.

5. Lack of self-discipline

Discipline has such a negative connotation for so many. Discipline in essence is control. And for leaders, self-discipline means self-control.

The quickest way for a leader to lose leadership respect is to lose self-control — specifically to lose their temper. I’ve witnessed it too many times. Leaders get angry — and they show it. A bad thought comes in their head — and it comes out their mouth. And the sad part of this leadership flaw is it results in self-inflicted wounds.

Need to rebuild your leadership reputation? These 2 actions can help.

6. Ineffective communication

Communication is most effective when a connection is formed. The more connected you are, the more effective your communication will be. Leaders who spend time making connections with their people are going to be better communicators — and better leaders!

But in the rush to “get things done,” some leaders make the mistake of thinking “one size fits all.” That’s the thinking of an ineffective communicator. It may also be a sign of an insensitive or indifferent leader.

How have you seen these “bad 6” leadership flaws play out? Let me know in the comments below.

 

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3 Stories Leaders Need to Know About Employees

Stories unlock answers to challenges leaders must overcome. To hire the right people, get them to stay, and continue to perform above expectations, start by learning these three stories leaders need to know about employees.

3 Stories Leaders Need to Know About Employees

Strategies you’ve heard that promise to help you recruit, retain, and lead great employees — but allow no room for individual customization — likely won’t work for leading the current and future workforce. Why? Our economy and diversity. The workforce is more diverse than ever — education, experiences, expectations, and more. In our economy, people have access to hundreds of thousands of jobs just a click away on their phones. Empirical evidence suggests that leaders who take an individualistic approach to lead their team will ultimately be much more successful than those who don’t.

How do leaders know how to lead whom? Storytelling and story seeking. When it comes to understanding how to lead people, stories tell you what statistics can’t. Stories capture attention, are memorable, and are personal. Stories break down barriers and build bonds.

Storytelling and story seeking shouldn’t be random. Instead, it must be intentional. Here are 3 stories every leader needs to know about employees.

Defining Memories

Unless something extremely significant happens, most of how we show up in the workplace is shaped by what we experienced growing up. As a child and young adult, we learned how to build relationships, respond to rejection, achieve success, deal with conflict, work as a team, and more.

One story you might share and seek would be the story about how you/they learned their work ethic.

Think about this…

My husband learned from his dad that showing up and working hard — even when it’s not convenient — will end up earning you experience, success, and respect for decades to come. From a leadership perspective, if an employee grew up learning a strong work ethic and realizing the benefits, it’s a safe assumption that they’ll show up with a strong work ethic throughout their time in the workforce, too.On the other hand, I grew up with parents who did not work. I saw, felt, and lived the negative effects of that. I never want that for myself or my family. As a leader, if you have an employee that was dealt a tough hand and they overcame, it’s likely they’ll continue that same positive trajectory going forward.It could be that you are interviewing a potential candidate. If you ask them where/how they learned their work ethic and they have no response, this could potentially be a red flag or sign of challenges to come from a dependability or performance perspective.

A leader who understands an employee’s past can predict and prepare for how the employee will act in the future.

Today’s Heartbeat

Many organizations do exit interviews. Fewer organizations have implemented “stay interviews”. It’s important for leaders to know what keeps an employee showing up and giving their best so you can make sure you don’t stop doing what they’re liking…whether it’s the way you give feedback, the flexibility their position offers, etc.

A story you might share and seek would be the story about what a perfect day in their work-life would look like.

One employee may be quick to tell you that they would come in, keep their head down, do their job, not hear from anyone, and get to leave on time. Another employee might tell you that they’d want to be involved in many different projects, interacting with lots of different people, and wrap the day up with a one-on-one meeting with you to discuss progress. Ultimately, you may hear little nuggets from the employee about when, how, or what they need from you.

A leader who understands why their employees stay is more likely to never have to watch them leave.

American Dreams

Do you know where you and your employees want to be in one, five, ten years? If you haven’t had a personal conversation about this in the past year or two, now would be a great time as we’re coming off 2020 and kicking off 2021.

To get them to tell you a story, ask them to tell you a story about what success will look like to them after ten more years.

Someone may surprise you and tell you that they picture themselves being an entrepreneur. As a leader, you need to know if someone is not in it for the long haul. Another employee may tell you that they want to be a leader in a different department in the organization. As their leader, there’s your sign that you should start giving them opportunities to grow, as well as, making time to develop their replacement when they get promoted.

When a leader understands the destination, they can make plans to take roads to get their team there faster, better, stronger.

The One Time Leaders Should Talk Before They Listen

If you’ve ever been in our comprehensive leadership development program, you know how critical it is for leaders to listen first. However, this may be the one time that I suggest that leaders should actually talk first.

People are more willing to share personal, insightful stories with people they trust. Before you jump straight into asking employees about their stories, start by sharing yours. When you intentionally open up to people about your life, they’ll feel you trust them more. In turn, they’ll be more likely to feel they can trust you, too.

Ever had an employee share a really eye-opening story with you? If you can, I’d love to hear about your experience. Leave a comment below!

Ready to start improving your organzation’s leadership culture? Let’s talk!

#storytelling #storytellinginleadership #leadership #leadershipdevelopment #professional development #greatleadership

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Effective Communication Hard for You? Try This.

George Bernard Shaw is quoted as saying, The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place.” I think he has a point. Families, friendships, businesses — even nations — live and grow on effective communication. So why is it so hard? And what can you do to be sure you communicate successfully?

A Curse on Effective Communication

You’ll often hear people say, “I’m not a great communicator but I do what I need to do. I’m good enough — I can talk to anybody for 15 minutes.”

Well, the reality is that attitude is the kiss of death — even a curse on effective communication. A lazy communicator is willing to take whatever level of communication skill they’ve attained and stay right there. If — and this is a big IF — everyone and everything around them stays the same — that approach might get them by for a short time.

But the fact is people around us — those we lead — the ones we most certainly need to effectively communicate with — are changing every day.  And their expectations of us as effective communicators are based on the experiences they’ve had apart from us.

So if we’re not growing, advancing, preparing ourselves accordingly…  If we’re satisfied with good enough then frankly, we’re going to be disappointed with the results of our communications.  And the compounding consequence of ineffective communication piles up more problems each day we don’t get better.

(Use these 6 questions to improve your communication.)

Check Your Focus

So why is effective communication so hard in the workplace? In short, leaders sometimes get too focused on themselves instead of the people that they’re trying to communicate with.

This is especially true for frontline supervisors. For instance, when an employee starts a conversation with their supervisor and the supervisor spends more time talking about his or her own problems instead of the employee’s — that’s when a communication disconnect happens.

My professional career started in manufacturing. In settings like that there may be 500, 1000, multiple thousands of people under the same roof. All of them different: different ages, different experiences, different educational levels, and different expectations. 

We can’t expect to be successful getting that many people to align with our way of communicating.

Effective Communication is Rigidly Flexible

So I like to think in terms of being “rigidly flexible” in my communication efforts. Rigidly flexible.  I know what I need to communicate — I’m rigid on the message. 

But I will be flexible in picking an approach to help me communicate that message effectively. Do some people need the message delivered face-to-face? I’ll choose that method for them. Would a story or example help someone else understand? I’ll try that. 

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Listen More, Talk Less, But Always Ask

But hands down, I’ve found the most effective communicators step out of themselves. They focus more on the needs, experiences and circumstances of others, rather than expecting other people to do that for them.

So if they’re talking to their spouse, their children, their friends, people in their organization or any other, those people are more successful because they listen more and talk — about themselves — less.

Listening more and talking less are important.

But here’s the bottom line. To ensure communication isn’t just an illusion, always ask. Sounds simple? Yes, but how many times do we make assumptions? 

Simply ask:

“Did I hear you say… — did I get that right?”

It’s an easy question and it works both ways. To ensure your message was heard correctly, ask for a simple restatement of what you said.

“I want to be sure I communicated this effectively — what did you hear me say?”

Stay “rigid” on the message. But if a clarification is needed, be flexible and choose a different method. 

Give It a Try

Effective communication isn’t an illusion when we go beyond “good enough” and commit to being “rigidly flexible.” If you’re serious about communicating more effectively, here’s a challenge:

Spend one day, consciously asking, “Did I hear you say… — did I get that right?”

And be sure to let me know how it turns out for you. I’ll be eager to hear!

 

Did you know communication skills is the #1 soft skill prized by employers?
Get the skills you need with this book. 

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3 Ways Leaders Should Talk About Employees

We believe leaders should talk with employees, not to employees, or at employees. But should leaders talk about employees? It depends. Let’s discuss the four ways leaders should talk about employees so employees feel they can trust and respect their leaders.

4 Ways Leaders Should Talk About Employees

It happened again just last week. Someone asked me how they should handle a situation where their boss is talking about an employee to the employee’s coworkers. Picture it — as you come closer to turning a corner in the hallway, you hear your boss talking negatively about one of your favorite co-workers. Surely my boss is talking to HR or to their supervisor, you think to yourself. But you turn the corner to find her talking to simply another one of your coworkers — her employee. After a quick peek, you turn around and head in the other direction…the entire walk back to your desk your internal monologue oozing with thoughts of distrust, disrespect, and disgust.

Situations like these happen, sadly, so often. When you’re a leader, you must hold yourself to a higher standard — your employees sure do. Strong teams are built on a foundation of trust. If your people can’t trust you, it means that at any moment they could be ready to go work for someone else, questioning everything you say, and so on.

In order to help you maintain and build trust with your people, here are the three ways leaders should talk about employees.

Where: Publicly or Privately

Have you heard some version of the popular phrase “praise in public, punish in private”? This applies to leaders in the workplace. It’s great for leaders to brag on employees publicly. If your people are doing an incredible job, spread those words of praise around in public like confetti on New Year’s Eve. However, if an employee is underperforming, that’s a conversation that should happen privately, behind closed doors, and only with the underperforming employee, your supervisor, or HR (see next section).

Who: Up, Not Down

This is the only time you will hear me put “leadership weight” in someone’s position. At VHA, we believe that leadership is not about position, but your willingness to serve and take action. However, in this very specific topic, we must take your position into account.

Think about your organizational chart. When it comes to employee issues — talk up the chart, not down the chart. Your standard should be that you will not discuss employee issues with anyone below you on the org chart. Instead, you should talk up. Go to your supervisor. If your supervisor isn’t any help, go to HR.

Why shouldn’t you talk about employee issues to those people below you on the chart? Instinctively, people believe they should be able to trust their leaders to have their employee’s best interests at heart. They don’t instinctively feel the same way about their coworkers. As a leader, you have to separate yourself from your employees. If you share potentially hurtful information with an employee’s coworker, you’re opening the door for ALL of your employees to lose trust in you. Additionally, you shouldn’t be putting nails into your team’s coffin. If you start talking bad about one employee to another employee, you’re creating an environment where people start working against one another, trust is broken between all of you, and ultimately that will be the demise of any good team.

When: Not At All

There are times when leaders should and should not discuss an employee with other people in the organization. If you’re searching for a solution to a problem, seek guidance the right way (see above). If you’re just wanting to vent — don’t. As a human being, there’s no good reason for you to run someone else through the mud because a short venting session would make you feel good. This is where a leader’s emotional intelligence is key. If there’s an issue with an employee that has you worked up and you don’t actually need guidance on how to manage the situation, you need to realize that you need an emotional release. When that’s the case, find a healthy way to deal with it. Go for a walk. Eat a Snickers. Take time away from the situation and work on something else. Go back to it and deal with it when you’re level-headed.

Communicate on Purpose

Communication is the one skill that when executed correctly, can totally transform individual and team success. However, communication problems continue to be at the very top of the list of issues organizations are experiencing.

Communication is not just the words you speak…it’s why, how, when, and where you interact with someone. Going forward, be the leader that chooses to be really intentional about how you communicate — starting with talking about employees. Over time, you’ll see the positive repercussions from your due diligence.

 

Our Leadership Development Training helps organizations ELEVATE PRODUCTIVITY and PROFITS through intentionally engaged leaders and teams. Learn more here: www.vanhooser.com!

 

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Do You Even Know My Name?

If we’re honest, we often find a “people issue” at the root of many of our work problems. Sometimes it’s caused by something as simple as being unable to respond to the question: “Do you even know my name?” If a leader can’t get the answer right, it could be the best place to start. It’s not easy. But even with large teams and work from home staff, it is possible. If you want to save yourself a lot of problems and see teamwork and performance soar, consider this.

Do You Even Know My Name?

While being interviewed by Janet Eastman and Kevin Snook on the Make It Right Podcast, I was asked about the best boss I ever had. My response was easy and quick! His name is Jerry! And I’ll never forget his name. Jerry took me — an inexperienced college graduate — and taught me many foundational leadership practices.

Often I didn’t understand or see the wisdom in some of the things he instructed me to do. But in hindsight, Jerry knew the secret to successfully leading one employee or one hundred. And how to head off a lot of people issues in the process.

Early on, Jerry gave me this assignment. Spend thirty minutes a day — EVERY DAY — walking around the plant floor — talking with people. Initially, this seemed to me to be a futile exercise and maybe even a waste of money and time (mine, primarily!) Plus, ours was a very large operation with hundreds of employees with multiple shifts. So I seldom ever saw some of our people.

Jerry didn’t care about the excuses. His concept of “walking around” was a requirement. I distinctly remember asking Jerry what to do while I’m on the floor. He told me not to worry about it. Just spend 30 minutes a day doing it and you’ll figure it out.

At the time, that didn’t seem like much help.

I Don’t Think I Know Your Name

So the first time out, with no real idea of what I was doing, maybe you can understand I was scared to death. I literally set my watch, thinking, “Thirty minutes from this minute, and I can get out of here!”

Then I headed out on the plant floor and started walking around. As I started, all I did was introduce myself. “Hi, I’m Phil. I don’t think I know your name.” And I would offer each person my hand.

This “exercise in futility” went on for weeks. I even scheduled into my calendar spending time on second and third shifts — just walking around.

Why Do You Want to Know My Name?

And naturally, people were suspicious. Many, especially those on the later shifts, were thinking, “What is he trying to do?”

Funny thing is, many nights in the wee hours, I wondered the same thing to myself, “What am I doing here? I don’t get it.”

So to offset their suspicions, I would simply confess, “I don’t know what you do and I don’t know anything about this process. Can you give me a quick overview of how all this works?”

The employee would usually talk to me for a couple minutes, explaining what they do. Then I would say, “I don’t want to interrupt you anymore, but thank you for helping me understand.”  Again, I would offer them my hand.

I would continue introducing myself and talking with people. And as soon as 30 minutes was up, I would retreat back to the security of my office — or my bed. But the next day I do it again — and the next day and the next day and the next.

(Use these 5 “starter” questions to get to know your team better.)

The Payoff When Barriers Come Down

Now here’s the cool thing… I can’t tell you how long it took, but I will never forget the first time it paid off!

I’m walking through the plant, not enjoying the experience at all, when all of a sudden I heard someone yell, “Hey, Phil, come here. I have a question for you.”

And in that moment, the barrier — the wall — between me and our people started coming down! From then on, I couldn’t get through the plant in 30 minutes for people stopping me to talk, to share concerns, to ask questions. And before long, I knew every person’s name.

But I didn’t just know their names. They would tell me about their lives, their families, their hobbies, their goals. I learned from their insights and heard about their concerns. They shared their valuable experience and they helped me see problems I could fix before they became out of control.

I have story upon story of people…

offering innovative ways to fix or prevent major problems;sharing creative ways to improve productivity and cut costs;and going far beyond what their positions required for the good of the team — often without being asked!

All this information and these perspectives came to me because I made an effort to engage with people. And it started by getting to know their names.

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Here’s How To Change Things

Don’t miss the point here. Spending less time in the office and more time in the presence of your people changes things.

Get to know your people. Even if they work on a different shift than you. Or at a different location than you. (Yes, that includes work from home staff.) Make time getting to know each of your people — in person or if necessary, virtually.

And, yes, it starts with getting to know their name.

I promise you this — you will not be sorry about the time you invested. It’s an investment that pays HUGE dividends in employee trust and builds working relationships that deliver improved performance.

What Works For You?

So in your experience, how have you broken down walls between you and your people? I and others would love to hear what works you. Thanks!

Not Sure How to Start Building Trust with Your People? This Book Can Help

#knowmyname #talktopeople #30minutesaday #theemployeesaidtothemanager #engagedleadership #buildingemployeetrust #betterworkrelationships #investinyourpeople

 

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Legos, Leadership, and Leveling Up

It’s not a bad idea for leadership to involve employees in hopes that they will increase their knowledge, become more invested in the work, and overall become a stronger asset for the team. But, involvement is only half of the solution that will earn you those results you want. What leaders must do is both involve AND engage employees. Here’s why and how.

Legos, Leadership, and Leveling Up

Willow and Lincoln, my two oldest kids, are often asked to play with Duke, my three-year-old, while I work in small nuggets of time with all the kids at home right now.

The toy of choice in our house is Legos – we have hundreds of them. My bigger kids love them so it’s the go-to activity when the big kids are on “Duke duty” while I knock out some work. My hope is as Duke plays with the big kids, he will learn how to build, learn bigger words, learn how to play well with others, and more. Of course, I also hope that the time they spend together helps build a solid foundation for their relationship.

Imagine the kids all at the table with hundreds of tiny building blocks. Do you know what happens when a three-year-old sees a new, tall, freshly built house his brother or sister just created? Well, I can tell you he doesn’t stand back in awe. Quite the opposite. Picture a threenager on level eleven, using his arm like Thor’s hammer and making vocalizations that would make you think a T-Rex had come back to life. Then, as Lego pieces come crashing down under the force of a toddler on a mission, without fail, the next sound I hear in older sibling unison is, “MOM!”

Immediately I know what’s happened.  Willow and Lincoln have involved Duke, but they have not engaged Duke. Here’s what I mean…

Involving Versus Engaging Leadership

Involving someone looks like all three kids sitting at the table, each with their own pile of Legos. Likely, the older two are building something with each other or that goes together. Duke, happy to simply be at the table with them, he is building by himself. He will look every now and then at what they’re doing, but if he tries to help, he’s quickly redirected or ignored. Eventually, Duke will get tired of being on the outside…involved but not engaged. That’s when we have the King Kong situation. When someone is only involved, not engaged, It ends up being a no-win situation for everyone.

However, both involving and engaging someone makes for a very different experience and result.

Involving AND engaging looks like all the kids are at the table playing with the Legos again, but this time they invite Duke to play a real part in their building process. They ask Duke what he thinks they should build, then they listen and consider his suggestions. When Duke asks why a million times, they patiently answer his questions. They encourage Duke to put Lego’s on the building, even if it might mean they have to do more work in the end fixing it.

When both involved and engaged, Duke learns how to play and build better. He ends up having more fun which means they play together longer (…more work time for mom!). And ultimately, Willow and Lincoln have made little deposits into the relationship bank with Duke that will reap benefits for their entire life. It’s a win-win for everyone.

2 Tips to Create Better Teams

You see, in organizations, oftentimes well-intentioned leaders involve employees, but they don’t reap the valuable results they hope for because they didn’t also engage employees.

As a leader, if you want your people to perform better, as well as create more respect and loyalty among your team, here are two actions for you to consider when it comes to both involving and engaging employees:

1-Invite more people to important meetings.

Sure, most people wouldn’t be excited to attend another meeting, but high performers probably would be! The opportunity to learn beyond their current role and responsibilities is a big deal to employees who are looking to capitalize on opportunities.

Is there an aspect of your business that some employees would benefit from understanding better? Maybe you could invite them to a meeting…a new loan officer to an Asset-Liability Committee meeting, a production supervisor to Annual Operating Planning meetings, emerging leaders to Succession Planning Meetings, etc.

And don’t invite them and let them sit on the side. Instead, let them play with your Legos. Let them build with you, not near you. Welcome questions, not silence. Be the leader that identifies people with potential and involves them in experiences that help them grow.

2-Give increased responsibility then encourage your people to try and fail.

It can be hard to trust someone who hasn’t yet proved themselves to successfully complete a job or part of a big project. Although, if given the opportunity, just like a really smart toddler, a person may surprise you with their success.

On the other hand, the person very well may fail. Duke may put the wrong size Lego in the wrong spot or accidentally knock something over while trying to help. But, after he recognized the mistake, he will work to fix it. And, it’s unlikely that he would make that same mistake again which means he becomes a stronger part of the team.

Failure stings, but pain is one of the best teachers.

Be the leader that creates increasingly strong, productive teams because you appreciate failed attempts that eventually deliver positive results.

Level Up Your Leadership

The very best leaders understand that true leadership is serving others. Involving and engaging employees is an act of service – one that will take serious time and effort. That act of service will be one that will improve your team and your leadership.

I want to encourage you today to take your leadership to the next level by both involving and engaging your team members better. It starts first with a little assessment:

Who on your team is not involved?Who on your team is involved, but not actively engaged?

After you know who is where, work to bring everyone on your team to involved and engaged status. There is where you all will reap the benefits!

Learn more about our Transformational Leadership Development Training that helps leaders and teams ELEVATE PRODUCTIVITY and PROFITS through engaged leadership here: www.vanhooser.com!

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