Anita Dawes's Blog: http://jenanita01.wordpress.com, page 26

Love Really Does Make the World go Around...

Love really does make the world go around...

This week I have been thinking about all the different kinds of love there are, and how many I have had the good fortune to have shared. Unfortunately this also highlighted the ones I haven't or made a complete hash of, but you can't make an omelette without breaking eggs, right?
Or I can't, anyway...
I miss not knowing my dad and I really wish I had never known my mum. (but that's another story altogether!) Then there were two husbands one after the other that I'm glad I don't miss in the slightest.
I was told once a long ago that I had two brothers somewhere, and they are possibly what I think I miss the most.  Sometimes I watch Anita's son and daughter and really envy their relationship. They do fight and argue sometimes, but they are always there for each other, instinctively knowing what each of them needs and offering it before the need to ask.
It would appear that missing things is one of the saddest aspects of growing old and I don't care for it too much.  I don't want to spend the time I have left complaining about this and that, bemoaning what was or what could never be.  My life has been what I could make out of it, good or bad and I have come to the conclusion that I'm not the kind of person who will waste any time worrying about all the ifs and maybe's. What's done, is done. (or not, as the case may be...)
I was wondering what to write about this week, when I realised it was Valentine's Day  and it got me thinking about all the things I love at the moment. (and what with the weather and all, I did need the reminder). Which was a nice change from all the problems and mini disasters that have been depressing me of late and it lifted my mood considerably.So much so, that when I ventured outdoors yesterday, battling against freezing winds and rain to run an errand, I began to notice things that I might not have noticed last week. Mother Nature was apparently on the move, for here and there in people's front gardens I saw daffodils quietly growing, pushing their long pointed leaves and flower buds like spears into the air.Was it too soon I wondered, were they going to come a cropper if the weather got any worse? But it was good to see them nonetheless, proving that Spring really can't be far away after all.


Back to all the things I love at the moment...·                 I love that I have the strength of my family around me.·       I        I love that I still have most of my health and some of my mental faculties. (more        important than I ever knew it could be)
I love that I have learned so much this year, mainly from the people I meet online each and every day. (and I  thank you all from the bottom of my heart)
I love that I'm finally writing my book and loving every frustrating minute of it.
I love people like Carol Hedges  who, through her advice, patience and humour has inspired me so much.  http://carolhedges.blogspot.com/
And Jeff Goins  who always has brilliant ideas to help you be a better writer. His '500 words a day' system really does seem to work. http://goinswriter.com/
The brilliant Valerie Poore for being a friend when I needed one. If I could be like anyone, it would be Valerie. She is an extraordinary writer and she lives on a boat!  http://wateryways.blogspot.com/
And for friendly technical advice, there is always Jonathan Gunson. His book 'The Merlin Mystery'  drove me crazy for nearly six months, but everything he writes is like opening a treasure chest!  http://bestsellerlabs.com/
Claudette J Young, for taking the time to explain to me exactly what 'thought verbs' were, and how much better your writing is without them!  http://claudettejyoung.com/
This list could be longer, as I have so much to be grateful for and so many people to thank. As and when my brain remembers who they are, I will post their names here, for you are all beautiful people.
See you all next week...Jay

Jay

Why does 'new' usually mean noisy?

 Last week it was workmen in my kitchen installing new cupboards and sink. Beautiful job and very pleased with the result but the noise was unbelievable.
This week there are more workmen working on the front of the house installing some sort of drainage inside the walls, which entails digging out a row of bricks to accomodate this. Considering all this is happening outside my house, the noise level is worse than last week. Plus they are doing the same to the houses on either side so it will seem to go on forever. I keep telling myself that if it stops the walls getting so wet it will be worth it, but it's a small compensation, even though I know we are much better off than some parts of the country where they are literally drowning in water. The picture above says it all, fancy going shopping in a boat? I would go for a walk if the weather wasn't so bad, but it's chucking freezing rain in all directions so I'm staying put, trying to find something to take my mind away from it all.

                                                              ~~~~~~Today I had an epiphany.I realised that I am living in the land of Murphy's Law. You know the one, where if anything has a mind to go wrong, it usually will.

Anything from people to toasters, nothing is excluded.I also realised among other things that there was precious little I could do about any of it anyway.

Apart from everything going wrong at the drop of a hat, I have come to notice just how anti-socially demanding the world seems to be getting.We have a very stubborn cat who is constantly thinking up ways to get his own back if we don't jump to his demands fast enough, and God help us if we refuse to co-operate! Just last week we ignored his insistence that we  vacate his favourite chair and after the second time of asking he marched off in a strop and tried to claw up the bathroom carpet.

And it must be contagious, for the goldfish has started to display similar tendencies. After dashing about in his bowl, trying to look cute but finding no food was forthcoming, he tried to leap out of the water making a lot of mess and agressively loud plopping noises. I have never seen attitude in a goldfish before, but I suppose there's a first time for everything!
There is obviously some kind of conspiracy going on, for the toaster conspires to set off the smoke alarm only on those days you are short of time and patience. Mine computer also refuses to co-operate when it knows you are running wild with inspiration and anything at all will make it vanish.
This morning was a case in point. For over an hour I had trouble logging on to the internet, only to be told that everything was fine. If it was 'fine' why did I have a problem in the first place? Then the annoying toaster burnt my toast, setting off the smoke alarm yet again.I'm not sure which I detest most!
After considering all this and so much more, I have come to the conclusion that I don't really care what happens (or doesn't happen) anymore as long as I have a stack of books and a pen and paper in front of me, as I would like to finish '9Lives' before I shuffle off. The word count is now 42,000 so I'm about half way. (I think)
 This epiphany must have a lot to do with my age, for I realised something this morning that might be vitally important. It seems silly to fill my head and worry about all the things I could never change in a million years, just as it was equally silly to try and achieve something so monumentally difficult, or maybe impossible, at my time of life.Something about 'flogging a dead horse' keeps flapping about at the back of my head, and as I couldn't do that to a horse, dead or otherwise, I know I have to calm down and reduce my aspirations a little, for I have come to the conclusion that even with the best will in the world, you cannot make a silk purse out of anything else but a piece of silk. And it might be entirely possible that all we have is a scrap of cotton...

I may have more time left than I think, but I know now that I will not be banging my head repeatedly on the wall.  I will do only what I am happy doing and take my sweet time and enjoy it. And if it doesn't amount to a hill of beans, so be it...
 See you all next week...
 Jay


 

New Year, New Inspirations...

Chinese New Year...of the Horse

   Apart from the fact that I love Chinese food, their New Year has always fascinated me. Today, 31st January is the beginning of the Year of the Horse. The Chinese zodiac is an interesting way of living your life according to ancient beliefs and customs and can be a fun way of comparing how our different cultures interpret fate and how it affects us all. The Chinese zodiac originated as the telling of the Great Race, where twelve different animals representing people and their attributes had to fight their way across a river to see who was the winner. As good a way as any to establish some kind of pecking order I suppose. The horse, although a fast runner was not so good in the water and only managed to come seventh, so if you were born in the year of the horse everyone would know not to make you swim!  Seriously, some of these beliefs are so old they defy logic, but more often than not they do make sense. For instance I was born in the year of the monkey, making me (apparently) a crafty, clever kind of person who is always thinking and scheming, and I quite like that! I would have preferred to have been born in the year of the dragon. Those people are ambitious and romantic, intellectual and energetic. Usually leaders who strive for perfection... see what I mean?  


I still haven't managed to shake of the flu, and most days I feel pretty dreadful. Had a hell of a week too, which hasn't helped one bit! What with the flooding (some of our walls are still soaking wet and the paper is bubbling and coming off) we have had workmen installing a new sink and cupboards in our kitchen.  So for two days I couldn't even get in there! None of which was helping my creative flow in the slightest, so I consoled myself by finishing Dan Brown's book 'Inferno'. I have thoroughly enjoyed this book for several reasons. Firstly, he is a brilliant writer, his stories are full of wonderful places and puzzles (and I do love a riddle). Secondly, I have always wanted to visit Italy and thanks to Dan I feel I just have. One of the places that caught my imagination was in Venice, St. Mark's Basilica, a world famous Byzantine cathedral. To give it it's popular title, Chiesa D'oro or church of gold. It has a three part facade with ornate theological carvings and a Greek shaped interior. Everything you look at seems to be made of gold. All of the ceilings are covered in golden mosaics, most of which took seven centuries to complete and is the reason the basilica contains so many different themes. It is said that the air inside the basilica is so full of gold dust, that when you breathe you are taking minute specks of gold into your lungs, literally making you a better person, metaphorically and literally.   What really grabbed my attention were the horses. I am passionate about horses; any horses so when I started to read about the four huge statues of the bronze horses that were once above the main door of the basilica, it suddenly made a connection with the Chinese New Year. These horses originally came from Constantinople in 1204 and were probably Roman. Napoleon fell in love with them and promptly stole them. These horses have made it into the history books as the most stolen pieces of art. A rumour has it that one of these thieves had trouble hiding them in a crate so he cut their heads off. When they returned yet again, their heads had to be reattached, hence the strange collars they are all wearing. The horses that you see above the door nowadays are replicas; the original horses are now inside the basilica for their protection. From who, the weather or any future thieves? As I get older I am reminded of all the other lovely places I will never get to see. Reading about them is wonderful though and the next best thing... but I must stop reading for a while and write. See you all next week....












 





 

Different Strokes...by Anita...

Different strokes...by Anita...
 This week you have the pleasure of my company, as Jay still has the flu and feels terrible. I think I can manage to do this weeks post, although if it all goes haywire I will run screaming for the hills!
How Jay manages I don't know, for she tends to forget all kinds of things including her name some of the time. All joking aside, she has learned how to make bricks without straw among other things and achieved miracles. Far more than either of us could ever have imagined when we started out.
I can still remember how years ago, a computer was just something to play solitaire on, and now look at us! If we can just learn more about marketing and promoting our books, life would be even more wonderful.
It's all about the right time and place and we have been so close on occasion, just an eyelash away from recognition only to have to walk home, having missed the bus.
Bad Moon is far and away my favourite creation, my baby if you will, but over the years since it was written I have come to think of it as cursed in some peculiar way. Perhaps I shouldn't have chosen to write a book that was a mix of The Walton's meet Deliverance.  A very powerful story but maybe too powerful?
I seem to have an affinity with West Virginia in America, almost as though I have lived there at some time. I hear the dialect and I am instantly home, and when I write about the lives of my characters it really does seem to be a memory. Quite inexplicable really as I have never been there.  
Some of the best publishers really liked it, but somewhere along the road of their deliberations it all went pear shaped and they declined, almost as though they had discovered a nasty secret lurking in the pages. (Apart from nasty stuff I put there!)
I still write, I cannot help myself as writing is the only thing I think I am any good at. But try as I might, nothing that crawls out of my pencil is as good as my first effort and none of it seems to inspire me as much.
I wish Jay all the luck in the world with 9Lives. She has been putting off writing it for so long as everything kept getting in the way, so she kept it in the back of her mind wrapped in turquoise tissue paper, patiently awaiting its arrival. I have read the first few chapters and she writes well. I can't wait to read more, and that fact alone would indicate that 9Lives should be a good book.
Perusing Molly Greene's blog the other day, she commented on Anne R Allen's post, 'How to Blog your Way out of the Slush Pile and onto the Bestseller List'. http://annerallen.blogspot.comVeryinteresting reading!
Something else that I found very interesting... my granddaughter Kathryn told me about an amazing coincidence that happened to her the other day. She became aware of a poster that was on the wall of her college lobby. It read, 'Challenges are what make life interesting; overcoming these are what makes life meaningful.'
 She must have walked past this poster many times, but something made her stop that day. She thought it was an interesting statement and thought no more about it. Later that day at a Chinese restaurant she opened a fortune cookie and was astounded to read the very same statement!
You will be glad to hear that Jay will be back next week, but I have enjoyed talking to you all and will have to do it again sometime.
I have just been asked to mention that we have a new page on Facebook, 'Reading and writing for fun'... it's somewhere we can concentrate on all things literary...see you there!
 

If Wishes Were Horses...


Big Ben
If Wishes were Horses...
 Big Ben has always been a very special symbol in my life. I grew up in London and the deep resonant tones of the bell and the imposing majesty of the building is one of my most enduring memories of my time there.
London has many such landmarks and I love them all, but that tall clock tower on the river Thames embankment is far and away my favourite. By rights, my favourite should be the river itself, feeling as I do about water, but no. Very close though.
'Big Ben' is really just a nickname for the great bell itself, inside the famous clock tower at the north end of the Palace of Westminster in London. Built in 1858 and 96 metres high, it is the largest four faced chiming clock in the world. But the big bell itself is not the biggest. St Paul's Cathedral has a slightly bigger one, weighing in at 17 tonnes.
Scarily, the tower leans slightly to the North West, apparently caused by the tunnelling for the Jubilee Line Underground train. Big Ben in London
I came across this picture of Big Ben a few weeks ago, and I was instantly transported me back to another New Years Eve so many years ago.
That particular year, my friends and I had decided to celebrate the coming of the New Year in style. We would attempt some kind of pub crawl, visiting as many bars and public houses that we could manage in spite of the volume of people all doing the same thing; ending up at the embankment for the fireworks and Big Ben's majestic chimes.
We had such fun that night even though I knew I would not contemplate doing it again, as the amount of people all seriously intent on having as much fun as possible created more madness and chaos than I ever thought possible and a lot of the time I was scared to death.You see all the crowds on television, but could you imagine being there?
Of course, there should have been so much more trouble than there actually was, that many people most of them hysterical with excitement and booze should have deteriorated into a riot. But it never seemed to. No matter how squashed, drunk or freezing cold you happened to be, there was some kind of reverence going on, as if it would be a sin to ruin that night in any way.
Our journey around London that night was exciting, but I was glad when we found ourselves by the river just before midnight. We had left most of the throng behind and it was almost eerily quiet by the water. The fireworks were further up river and we seemed to have Big Ben all to ourselves.It was very cold that night, but at least it wasn't raining. I was one of the few people in our group that didn't have a partner, something I knew I would be wishing to change in the New Year. I had no idea of the direction my life would be taking. No plans and not many dreams either, for I had already learnt that dreaming was futile.So that evening ended up on quite a solemn note, and as the hands of the clock above us moved closer to the 12, the tears were not far away.
I had never been that close to Big Ben before and was not prepared for how loud the chimes would be. First came the melody and the vibrations seemed to crawl up my legs until my whole body seemed to be humming. When the big bell started to chime the hour, the vibrations became longer and deeper and it felt as though my heart would break.
More than fifty years later, the sound of that bell has the same effect, instantly transforming me into that lonely young woman who had already taught herself not to believe in dreams.I obviously knew a thing or two back then, for my life has not been full of the stuff that dreams are made of, rather the opposite. But I am still here, not quite ready to give up.
 



This week I have been pretty miserable because some kind soul has given me the flu. It's my own fault, I missed my annual flu jab, so I can't really complain. What I have been doing in the absence of any enthusiasm for anything else, is reading Dan Brown's new novel, 'Inferno'.
Based in Florence, I have been escorted around this city in style, visiting the most amazing places. I have always wanted to visit Italy but now I have a list of all the best places to go. More on this next week... 
So thank you Dan, for your brilliant writing, which has brightened up my week considerably!
See you all next week...
Jay


 

Life... but not as we know it?

 Watching the news the other morning, basically trying to discover if there was any respite from all this appalling weather, there was a story about children as young as six and seven in Estonia that were being taught not only to use computers but to program them too. I watched them as they made a small robot move around and Skype like professionals, their little faces animated and eager. Something suddenly struck me, they were having fun!
What a great idea I thought, then they won't grow into incompetent adults like me, unable to grasp even the basic fundamentals.
I seem to have been struggling with some computer or other for more than 30 years. The very first time I was introduced to a little square box of torment was when someone suggested that I could play chess on one and that it was easy. All I had to do was program it in and I was all set.
Well, I tried.
For hours I sat and entered all these numbers and symbols only for nothing at all to happen. No chess board appeared, but was I daunted? Not a bit.
I knew it had to be complicated, but also knew quite early on that I probably didn't have the sort of brain that was obviously required. I eventually I sought help, to be told I must have mistyped the series of numbers. Apparently, if just one digit is missing, nothing will happen.
This will never catch on, I thought. It's far too complicated. You would need to be Einstein at the very least, someone I was so far removed from as to be on another planet!

For years I stayed away from anything that looked even remotely like a computer until I was introduced to Amstrad, the word processing machine. I had been typing up Anita's manuscripts on a battered old typewriter and the thought of something quicker and more efficient was more than enough to get me interested.
And it was quite easy to use, with the added bonus that there was a printer attached. In a lot of ways the Amstrad was magic and before long, I was well and truly hooked. It also had the facility to play solitaire, something I am addicted to, even now. This eventually led me to a proper computer, which turned out to be a lot easier than the first time I tried as there was no more programming required. This is what progress is all about I thought, but sadly it was me that hadn't.
Even now, there are days when my PC refuses to do even the simplest of things and kicks me into touch.  I have to storm out of the room, defeated once again as I find most things to do with a PC very complicated, confusing and irrational. How much easier it might have been if I had learned the basics at school.
  Watching those children in Estonia actually enjoying their computers and smart phones, I was green with envy, if only because I believe that you should always enjoy what you do or it's just no fun.
It is a quandary, because I do enjoy writing, and almost enjoy formatting and uploading and all the other stuff you have to do to self publish these days. But on those dark days when my computer is uncooperative and makes me feel totally inadequate, I wish that I had been taught how to use a PC properly.
I have learnt so much from just trial and error and on a good day even a little proud of my achievements, but there is so much more I wish I knew. Sometimes I think I could write a book about all the stuff I want to know, but that would help no one, would it?
Children are our future and so are computers. It was good to see them hand in hand and having fun...

See you all next week, maybe the weather will be a little kinder then for us all...

Jay

Will we start as we mean To continue...?

This blog has turned out to be my own little kingdom and I know that as this blog improves, so will I. They say if you treat it like a child, feed it and nourish it, even learn to love it, it will make you a better writer, if not a better person.
What it will give me, I hope, is confidence.

It also provides  much needed discipline, for although it is only a 'blog' it is governed by the same rules as any other writing. The content should be the very best you can do, none of that 'oh, that will do' attitude.

I have learned far more about writing since creating this blog and reading other people's.
People who haven't tried it don't have a clue and tend to dismiss them as harmless time wasting.
That could not be further from the truth.
Unfortunately people will not fall over themselves to read what you write, whether it is a letter, blog or full length novel unless you are well known and/or famous. You have to create a written magnet, one that will attract attention. One that people will love to discover and keep coming back to.

In the six months I have been building this blog, I have discovered many such magnets and they are as good as reading a book. My day would not be complete without these 'mini reads'!
I have always been of the opinion that if you want to learn how to do something, study those who have already learned and succeeded, for you will discover that they have risen to the challenge and not been found wanting. Some of them will even tell you the right way to go about it!

This is how I have learnt to cook, knit, wallpaper a wall and even change the carburetter in an old Triumph car. Not to mention all my craft projects. My theory is, if someone made it in the first place you can have a go too. It's not really rocket science, but the important thing to remember is the quality of your achievement. None of my first attempts were any good, but if you are stubborn like me, it helps a lot and eventually you will manage something you are happy with.

The little tree in this photograph was my rendition of the 'Tree of Souls' from the film Avatar. It took a month to make and involved thousands of tiny pearl beads!



I have always wanted to be a writer. I enjoyed English at school and have written several poems. Ideas for stories have surfaced from time to time, but on the whole I was much too busy trying to live my life without too much heartache, and failing miserably.

But now I am retired and the misery has moved on. I can finally find out if I am any good as a writer. (or not!)
And this blog (and others like it) will be my benchmark.
I am now 50.000 words along with '9Lives' and reasonably happy with my progress, although to be honest, I never expected it to be so difficult.

Anita has really gone up in my admiration, she must be a genius, for she has completed four really good novels. She recently read the first chapters of 9Lives and is convinced that I can do it too!

And believe me, she is not just saying that...

I sincerely hope that everyone is geared up for a wonderful New Year, for I have a good feeling about 2014...

Best wishes and see you all next week...

Jay

Happy New Year!

I am writing this a few days before the birth of the new year, my head full of good intentions and strategies as usual. But I know before the year starts that it may never quite be as good as we intend, although there seems to be more optimism around than usual. Some people would say that maybe we shouldn't aim so high, then we might to achieve more. At least it would look that way, wouldn't it?
But it is just possible that we need to have these unrealistic dreams and ambitions to encourage us to be braver than we ever thought we could be.

It was a different story a few days ago. The festive preparations were under way and we were all set for a wonderful family Christmas... then things started to go wrong.
Late on Monday night we had the most colossal storm, 180 mph winds and torrential rain, but we were all safely indoors... or so we thought. Then we heard the sound of heavy dripping in between the gusting winds that were howling outside. On investigation, we discovered that the roof over the bay window at the front of the house was leaking like a sieve. The curtains were soaked through but the main damage was to the Christmas scene we always set up on a table in front of the window. It was our favourite scene, old fashioned houses with windows that lit up, a pretty little church with stained glass windows (also lit up) all clustered around a medium sized Christmas tree that was also covered in fairy lights. All laid out on realistic cotton wool snow.

Well, the snow was becoming even more realistic as we surveyed the damage, the dripping water was creating slushy, grubby looking areas  like real snow does just before it thaws. We realised quite quickly that anything electrical should be removed as quickly as possible before it was completely ruined. (or blew up!) So at 3.30 in the morning we had to dismantle the entire display and remove everything to a safe place, then lay out buckets and cloths as the storm showed no sign of stopping.

When we all woke up the next morning, our house looked like a war zone and not very festive at all. But the storm had abated and the sun was shining, we hadn't suffered too badly had we? Some poor souls had sustained real damage and lost their power, and might not be able to cook their Christmas dinner. We were lucky, a pile of ruined cotton wool and a lack of sleep was nothing in the scheme of things.

Major disasters always make you stop and count your blessings, for no matter what you are putting up with, there are always others who are worse off.  Two days after Christmas and some people still have no power, plus the stormy weather has not gone away and last night inflicted more hardship on even more people with more to come, apparently.
So, no matter what happens, we have so much to be grateful for. It is with this frame of mind that I contemplate the arrival of 2014.

I was exhausted and a little disheartened by the time Christmas was finally over. Two full days of family sized cooking accompanied by all the usual family sized arguments, and if I am honest, the prospect of another year that would undoubtedly be just as full of disappointment and hard work as this one had been was not rocking my boat in the slightest.

But today the sun is shining and I can feel a small surge of enthusiasm creeping into my heart and my head. In four months time I will be 70, an age I never thought I would reach, and I want to finish writing my book, '9Lives' by then. Something else I never thought I ever would or could do.

So I have the notion that 2014 is going to be the year where I change from being a daydreamer to someone who grabs the world by the tail and hangs on!


 


A very Happy and productive New Year to us all!

Best wishes from Anita & Jay...

A Very Merry Christmas to you all...

A very merry christmas to everyone, especially all those of you in this fascinating and sometimes infuriating digitalised world that we all willingly ensconced ourselves in.As a puzzle fanatic, I personally have discovered that writing, whether a book or a blog, is far more addictive than Sudoku, and never imagined I would become as hooked as I have.
Computers have always confused me, I don't think they are rational machines at all, but they do lay down a challenge, don't they?  Just how a mere machine can rattle your emotional and creative cage all at the same time is unbelievable if you think about it. (or maybe you would prefer not to!)

The change of font size (see above) is a case in point, and it refuses to be changed!

I for one, never thought I would master any of it, let alone accept the thousands of challenges that it throws at you on a daily basis. And it has to be said, meeting these challenges head-on seems to be making me a better writer.


Are we ready to say goodbye to 2013? Normally, I can't wait to start the New Year to see if it will be any better than the last, but this year I feel differently.
So much has happened and I have met and talked to so many interesting and kind people from all over the world and enjoyed every single minute. I have achieved so much more than I ever thought I could and feel very optimistic about the future.I will be really sorry to say goodbye to 2013. There, I have said it, and it's true.




I have gradually learnt to love the struggles, frustrations and even the failures that I have encountered this year and am looking forward to 2014 with more than hope in my heart for the first time in a very long while. Even though most of the time my brain is like my hated computer -- uncooperative and reluctant to perform even the simplest of tasks. New Years Resolution number one... learn to love my computer. You never know, it might start to love me back! Also, for the first time ever, I have a pretty good idea of what next year will bring and I say, bring it on...

My New Year wish is that we all have many more hopes and expectations to come and a great deal of satisfaction to go with them. Also, the sure and certain knowledge that we all matter a great deal, and that is not something to be sniffed at!
Best wishes from Anita and Jay, see you next week!

The most important thing in the world...

Olivia de Havilland 2013EVER LOVING SISTERS?

This story caught my eye today for several reasons.

Firstly, I am a sister myself, so I could easily
identify with what I read. Oh boy, can I!

Secondly, because I really didn't know that these two well known stars were sisters. Maybe I did somewhere along the line, and it has become another one of those facts that has drowned in the morass of this ageing brain.

Young Olivia
Thirdly, that they are the only set of sisters ever to win Academy awards.

What really surprised me though, was the discovery that these two literally fought like cat and dog their entire lives. Yes, I know that sisters tend to argue and fight a lot, but it is not compulsory and not all the time?

Not knowing they were related is easy enough to explain as their surnames were different. Although if you compare their younger photographs, they do look remarkably similar. Olivia kept her real name, but due to some peculiar favouritism of their mother, Joan was never allowed to use hers and had to call herself Joan Fontaine.
What on earth could that have been about?



Joan Fontaine 2013It would appear that the feud between the sisters was part of an on going family situation with everybody at odds with everybody else. Even Joan's daughters joined in and took their grandmothers side against their mother.

This is all reading like a Hollywood script, don't you think?
As with all family squabbles, and I say that tongue in cheek and with a fair amount of experience, you are really never quite sure who to point an accusing finger at. These things tend to start over something quite trivial, which then accelerates into a monster before you know what's happening. By then, it is usually too late to do anything about it, more's the pity.



Young Joan
I wonder what it was all about, and how it could have gone on unchecked for so many years.
They ended up living on different continents, but you get the feeling that the distance didn't matter.

Joan died peacefully in her sleep a few days ago, although I'm sure that wouldn't have made her feel any better. As she was once quoted as saying," I married first, won an Oscar first. If I die first, she'll be livid because I beat her to it."

Basically I wanted to write about these two, because I am a sister and know only too well what can happen. Because we are so different, with totally different ways of doing things, Anita and I have had some pretty horrendous rows. Some would call them spectacular, but most of them hurt both of us pretty badly at the time. We may be a pair of stroppy old cows, but we do hate it when we fall out. The thought of it going on for years doesn't bear thinking about, and I for one could not live like that. Even if we were filthy rich and continents apart!

At this time of year in particular, I am incredibly grateful to be part of my family, for there was a time when I had no one. Tragic circumstances had done their utmost to make me an emotional cripple and I bear the scars to this day, although they have faded a good deal, thanks mainly to the love and support I receive on a daily basis from my family. A sometimes annoying, often demanding but eternally surprising family, all of whom I love so very much.

See you all early next week...

Jay