David Rat's Blog: "RAT BITES"
January 23, 2015
Doug Scharin, Codeine, and The White Birch interview
Doug Scharin is One of my favorite Drummers from one of my favorite Bands and participated in the creation of my
Favorite album of all time
"Codeine...The White Birch"
It is everything I look for in a work of High Art...Beautiful, Brutal, Honest and extremely unique groundbreaking and dynamically entrancing...I often refer to it as the "Gloomy Sunday/Berlin of our time...Doug is a kind and thoughtful gentleman who allowed me to interview him a few months back...My foray into Rock Journalism is on hold for now... But I've been sitting on this for awhile..It is still slated for publication in a larger venue...But I thought I'd give my FaceBook/Goodread friends a sneek peek.....
DAVID: Where were you born? What made you decide to spend your life in the Arts? Do you remember the first album you bought? Your first Drum?
DOUG: They tell me I was born in Hartford, Connecticut. I don't remember that event, but I do know that I grew up around suburban West Hartford.
It's possible that the first record I bought was a K.C. and the Sunshine Band record when I was about 10. Around the same time I remember listening to my brothers 8-track of Herbie Hancock's Thrust.
I remember thinking that it was the first music that made sense to me and the sound of that record has had lasting effects.
In '76-77, when I was 11 or 12 I'd draw pictures of rock bands with friends or my brother. We drew Zeppelin or Kiss or Aerosmith most of the time. I remember that I did always like drawing the drums. Extra care taken to get the toms to look just right!
My moms partner was/is a drummer and at that time was playing in NYC with a group called Son.
That group rehearsed in our basement for a couple of weeks in preparation for a small tour they had set up. It was an exciting time. Those dudes were freaks in the best way possible. I'd get home as quickly as I could from school, sit on the stairs to the basement watching and listening. The bassist has this uncanny knack of always knowing if you were watching him play. He'd shoot a really quick glance in your direction if you were. The guitarist would get pissed off if we made too much noise while he was trying to write. The bass player taught me a little about perspective when I was trying to draw Peter Criss. He also would get us to come down to the basement to play music with him.
I hadn't ever really played drums and this too was the first time I ever played an electric bass. I didn't know what to do with it and it felt like I was being electrocuted every time I touched it.
The bass player was Bill Laswell. I saw him once more, briefly, maybe a year or so later playing at Trinity College in Hartford which very well might have been the Zoo band with Daevid Allen.
7 or 8 years later I stumbled across 'Basslines', Laswell's first solo recording, in a Boston record shop. A new world was revealed at that moment. There's nine other musicians on that record. A few, like Ronald Shannon Jackson, Fred Frith, Martin Bisi and Philip Wilson would, in the subsequent years, have huge influence on my way of approaching music.
Later in high school I was into Zeppelin, but was a bit of a Who fanatic. (Probably more than a bit.)
In my last year of high school a friend's older brother introduced us to a load of records he'd brought home from New York City.
Records like the first Clash, Elvis Costello, Ramones, Talking Heads, Sex Pistols, Pretenders records were already 5 plus years old for me, however, it was all fresh. Cable TV along with MTV was new to us.
There was this sort of endless flow of information to absorb that offered an interpretation exciting and far out of my suburban environment.
I suppose these were the first moments where I began to feel a pull towards the Arts.
I bought an electric guitar. Couldn't do anything with it that I considered musical. Frustrated, I turned to the drum kit my brother had left behind when he split from home. I wasn't so good, but because of being left handed with a kit set up for a righty, I naturally played an inverted rhythm where my left foot played the down beat on hi-hat and the kick drum was on the up. I still can remember what I played and I remember the feel of it.
I looked for other musicians to play with and was quickly encouraged to get into a band.
By the end of 1983, after spending the summer in a small Italian village south of Naples, It was clear that travel needed to play a big part in my life. If I could get into a band situation I knew it was possible.
I took the next step by moving to Boston at 19 which at the time had a thriving music scene.
Before moving, I acquired a drivers license with an altered birth date so I could get myself into clubs. I went out to 2 or 3 clubs seven nights a week.
Maybe a half a year later I was in my first band called The Boll Weevils playing around the Boston area. We were headlining for our 3rd show on a Monday or Tuesday night at the Green St. in Jamaica Plain with the Pixies opening up for us. It was their 2nd show. I didn't see any point of playing after they were through.
There were also countless record shops where I spent the majority of my time and savings. Thankfully, not before I bought my first drum kit. A 1984 Premier Resonator kit. It's still my only full drum kit.
DAVID: When I Opened for Codeine at CB´s, I just sat right on the stage behind you...Watching every preconception of what I aspired to be as a drummer completely change...The Bands Slow tempos gave you the means to really dig into this mad primal minimalism...that I haven´t heard anything like since...but your work made me get off the top heavy Keith Moon wannabe thing..I decided a note was a beautiful thing...why waste it? Was this a natural style for you? Or was it at times more to accomodate Codeine´s bleak landscapes?
DOUG: Of course the music certainly dictated the style and given the opportunity to play it, I needed to accommodate accordingly. Early on, being self taught, I had little resources outside of feel. That first time I sat down, with intent, on my brother's kit, I just felt something in the groove. It was a connection… you know?
I think that has always remained with me. It needs to feel.
I wasn't so much unfamiliar with slow tempos, It was more a matter of the restraint required for the songs to be most effective. It had to swing free of ghost notes.
Before moving to New York and joining Codeine, I was living in Portland, Maine playing with a band that would later become Rex. We wrote songs at relatively slow tempos. (We got slower after Curtis Harvey and I went down to Boston to see Codeine's first show.)
Musically, with Codeine, I knew what I was getting into and I knew that I could play it.
DAVID Let´s talk about "The White Birch" Such a profound and groundbreaking work...Thankfully no suicides have been attributed to it, But I truly believe it´s our generation´s "Gloomy Sunday"...How did you get the gig? Was it true the band couldn´t find a drummer to play slow enough? Where was it recorded? What was the mood like During the sessions? How do you maintain such meticulous tempos?...Did you guys joke around at all...? I´m fascinated...
DOUG:
The making of the record was complicated well before I was ever in the band. I believe it was the second try at making The White Birch. I wasn't yet in the band for the initial attempt which resulted in the e.p. Barely Real.
The band was looking for someone to replace Josh Madell from Antietam. He was filling in after Chris Brokaw left to play guitar with Come full time.
I called Chris, who I met through Curtis Harvey. He gave me a number for John Engle who was living in Hoboken. I had left Portland and was living Brooklyn by this time.
I woke John up at 1:00 in the afternoon with a call asking for an audition. I auditioned once or twice but didn't get the job. They chose a drummer from Richmond, Va. who they hadn't played with before. It was a gamble.
Unfortunately, he wasn't quite up to it. The kid took off in the middle of the night leaving them a note saying something about missing his mom and his cat. (fair enough)The band found themselves away from New York, in Louisville, with a tour and recording session booked, but without a drummer.
Stephen called and asked me to come there for a month of rehearsals.
I put my things in storage and left Brooklyn driving the 10-11 hours overnight. Listening to nothing but the records and demos, I used the time to learn every arrangement and get inside of the songs.
In Louisville, we rehearsed for 5-6 hours a day, 6 days a week. We might have played some shows on our way to Chicago's Idful studios where we were booked to record the 5 or 6 basic tracks we had ready for the record.
The studio, in a corner of a Damen ave strip mall was relatively new and unassuming. They had a 16 track tape deck. can't remember if it was a 1" or 2" machine at the time. in any case, the machine shit the bed on us not long after we had set up. Can't recall how it all transpired. We might have been listening back or trying to record the first track. There was an issue with the machines transport or playback head. Anyway, it was spent and our frustrated producer along with the guys who ran the studio went on a mad scramble around Chicago looking for a replacement.
I played basketball across the street in Wicker Park. It took 2 or 3 days to sort out a machine to record on. We had to settle, much to the dissatisfaction of all, on 3 ADAT machines. It's a testament to how good the Idful live room sounded and Mike McMackin that those basics sound so good.
I really loved playing in that room and eventually would make 2 other records there. The session at Idful would produce about half of the basic tracks for the White Birch. From there we played our way back to NYC where I found myself homeless. I did some couch surfing and stayed for some nights outside on the fire escape of John and his girlfriends studio apartment.
We were then asked to tour as support for the Flaming Lips. That was a three week tour which was almost immediately followed by a month in support of Mazzy Star. It was over this period, mostly at sound checks, that the remaining songs for The White Birch were written, rehearsed and arranged.
After the tours a studio was located near New Haven, Ct., where Steve was living, called 3 communications. It was convenient, location-wise, and was an ADAT studio. The contrast to Idful couldn't have been more immediate. Dropped ceilings in a room that most likely once served as a windowless office selling cheap insurance.
The drums sounded like hell in there and I remember struggling with the tracking. There was a feeling that if the session hadn't produced suitable basics, then the record might never happen. The vocals we completed along with the mix at Mike McMackin's apartment in Park Slope. Over the course of this period, I remember the atmosphere was usually pretty tense. It's easy to vent frustrations on the new guy, so I did my best to keep my distance and focus on doing my job. I think it was a really difficult period for Steve. I think he put a mountain of expectations on himself.
I don't remember him smiling very often until we were almost done mixing the record. We stood outside on the steps of McMackin's flat and Steve was loose and seemingly happy. He looked different in that light. He told me he was really pleased with the end result.
DAVID: You´ve been involved with an impressive array of artists from Rex to june of 44, HiM and far beyond... was there a particular high point?
DOUG: Without a doubt, the 90's were a great time to be involved in the indie rock scene. There were so many bands, some of them quite good. lot's of them with good people involved. It was exciting. I was on tour or working on recordings year round. There was a broad network to support a band. CD's were fairly new. You could make a humble living. I was doing exactly what I wanted to do. playing a lot of music and traveling. As far as particular recordings are concerned, the making of Rex 'C' in Chicago at Idful still remains my favorite recording
DAVID: You´ve been really brave and outspoken about your political leanings...Where do you see the world in 50 years?... What do we have to do to give the next generation a snowball´s chance in hell?
DOUG: Idiocracy. have you seen Idiocracy? I just don't think it's going to take until 2525 for people to start watering their lawns with gatorade or for someone out of professional wrestling to become president. I mean, that's funny shit. but in truth, it's not funny at all.
The religion of money truly is the root of all evil…. don't you think?
How can we as a people have this form of capitalism and still be wanting more children?
What's left? A society is so massively disconnected from the very world that we were created out of that we can no longer survive in it?
espousing democracy all the while shitting on it's principles and still be saying "one nation under God"?
Who's God? Give me a fucking break.
Hypocrites and parasites.
I have kids of my own and so I fight to keep the optimism alive. I owe it to them. But it's increasingly difficult.
I'm not angry.
DAVID: You always seemed like a heavy spiritual cat to me...Do you have any thoughts on those matters? You´ve managed to stay really young looking...I can´t help but think you are doing something healthy..any meditation, yoga.. any particular spiritual path ?...It seems to me your work comes partially from somewhere else...not of this earth...
DOUG: I don't know where my work comes from other than the desire and determination to make it. It's a continuous process. Once I feel something is complete or close enough to put a rough mix down, I'll look through the hard drives for something new or take a riff and build on it. If it holds my attention for long enough and I feel it has potential, then I'll see where it takes me.
It's essential to allow for the music to lead.
If you let it, it will.
Music IS spiritual. It's the only spiritually tangible, non thing that I don't know.
As far as looking young. I try to balance a healthy mix of diet, exercise and intoxicating substances. Or maybe I've just been lucky.
DAVID: What are your current projects? is HiM still active?
DOUG: It's not inactive. but I'm continuously working on music. I have a record coming out in November under my name.
A first.
It's called 'Kate No Longer'.
OFF record label out of Brussels will be doing a limited amount of cd's as well as a digital release.
DAVID: You´ve always resisted the slowcore / sadcore tags... It´s impossible to catagorize your lifes work but...Are you comfortable with "Post Rock"? .Or any of the genres that were associated with that era of music history..
DOUG: I'd like it to be categorized as nice folks music. you could go to that section of the record store (do those still exist?) and other nice folks would be there listing to records. no assholes would go over there. you could listen to all kinds of interesting music and nobody would bother you. you might even find something unexpected that you really like.
DAVID: For me "The White Birch" was the perfect blend of Beauty and Sadness...I think a lot of people felt the same...Is there a relationship in your mind? Can we have beauty or joy in our lives without sadness and suffering?
DOUG: If we did, we wouldn't know what we had.
There has to be a contrast or conflicting elements. light and dark. Sound and silence, ebony and ivory man!
there's conflict in Codeine music on a number of levels. In music, it's the space that make the notes that are played matter.
There is a lot of space in that music.
DAVID: Any final thoughts, words of wisdom? Sure do appreciate your time and insight, Thanks so much Doug...So grateful....
DOUG: Find your way with all your heart and stay true to it. in other words, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.
Thank You David. Hope we can meet up soon.....
Favorite album of all time
"Codeine...The White Birch"
It is everything I look for in a work of High Art...Beautiful, Brutal, Honest and extremely unique groundbreaking and dynamically entrancing...I often refer to it as the "Gloomy Sunday/Berlin of our time...Doug is a kind and thoughtful gentleman who allowed me to interview him a few months back...My foray into Rock Journalism is on hold for now... But I've been sitting on this for awhile..It is still slated for publication in a larger venue...But I thought I'd give my FaceBook/Goodread friends a sneek peek.....
DAVID: Where were you born? What made you decide to spend your life in the Arts? Do you remember the first album you bought? Your first Drum?
DOUG: They tell me I was born in Hartford, Connecticut. I don't remember that event, but I do know that I grew up around suburban West Hartford.
It's possible that the first record I bought was a K.C. and the Sunshine Band record when I was about 10. Around the same time I remember listening to my brothers 8-track of Herbie Hancock's Thrust.
I remember thinking that it was the first music that made sense to me and the sound of that record has had lasting effects.
In '76-77, when I was 11 or 12 I'd draw pictures of rock bands with friends or my brother. We drew Zeppelin or Kiss or Aerosmith most of the time. I remember that I did always like drawing the drums. Extra care taken to get the toms to look just right!
My moms partner was/is a drummer and at that time was playing in NYC with a group called Son.
That group rehearsed in our basement for a couple of weeks in preparation for a small tour they had set up. It was an exciting time. Those dudes were freaks in the best way possible. I'd get home as quickly as I could from school, sit on the stairs to the basement watching and listening. The bassist has this uncanny knack of always knowing if you were watching him play. He'd shoot a really quick glance in your direction if you were. The guitarist would get pissed off if we made too much noise while he was trying to write. The bass player taught me a little about perspective when I was trying to draw Peter Criss. He also would get us to come down to the basement to play music with him.
I hadn't ever really played drums and this too was the first time I ever played an electric bass. I didn't know what to do with it and it felt like I was being electrocuted every time I touched it.
The bass player was Bill Laswell. I saw him once more, briefly, maybe a year or so later playing at Trinity College in Hartford which very well might have been the Zoo band with Daevid Allen.
7 or 8 years later I stumbled across 'Basslines', Laswell's first solo recording, in a Boston record shop. A new world was revealed at that moment. There's nine other musicians on that record. A few, like Ronald Shannon Jackson, Fred Frith, Martin Bisi and Philip Wilson would, in the subsequent years, have huge influence on my way of approaching music.
Later in high school I was into Zeppelin, but was a bit of a Who fanatic. (Probably more than a bit.)
In my last year of high school a friend's older brother introduced us to a load of records he'd brought home from New York City.
Records like the first Clash, Elvis Costello, Ramones, Talking Heads, Sex Pistols, Pretenders records were already 5 plus years old for me, however, it was all fresh. Cable TV along with MTV was new to us.
There was this sort of endless flow of information to absorb that offered an interpretation exciting and far out of my suburban environment.
I suppose these were the first moments where I began to feel a pull towards the Arts.
I bought an electric guitar. Couldn't do anything with it that I considered musical. Frustrated, I turned to the drum kit my brother had left behind when he split from home. I wasn't so good, but because of being left handed with a kit set up for a righty, I naturally played an inverted rhythm where my left foot played the down beat on hi-hat and the kick drum was on the up. I still can remember what I played and I remember the feel of it.
I looked for other musicians to play with and was quickly encouraged to get into a band.
By the end of 1983, after spending the summer in a small Italian village south of Naples, It was clear that travel needed to play a big part in my life. If I could get into a band situation I knew it was possible.
I took the next step by moving to Boston at 19 which at the time had a thriving music scene.
Before moving, I acquired a drivers license with an altered birth date so I could get myself into clubs. I went out to 2 or 3 clubs seven nights a week.
Maybe a half a year later I was in my first band called The Boll Weevils playing around the Boston area. We were headlining for our 3rd show on a Monday or Tuesday night at the Green St. in Jamaica Plain with the Pixies opening up for us. It was their 2nd show. I didn't see any point of playing after they were through.
There were also countless record shops where I spent the majority of my time and savings. Thankfully, not before I bought my first drum kit. A 1984 Premier Resonator kit. It's still my only full drum kit.
DAVID: When I Opened for Codeine at CB´s, I just sat right on the stage behind you...Watching every preconception of what I aspired to be as a drummer completely change...The Bands Slow tempos gave you the means to really dig into this mad primal minimalism...that I haven´t heard anything like since...but your work made me get off the top heavy Keith Moon wannabe thing..I decided a note was a beautiful thing...why waste it? Was this a natural style for you? Or was it at times more to accomodate Codeine´s bleak landscapes?
DOUG: Of course the music certainly dictated the style and given the opportunity to play it, I needed to accommodate accordingly. Early on, being self taught, I had little resources outside of feel. That first time I sat down, with intent, on my brother's kit, I just felt something in the groove. It was a connection… you know?
I think that has always remained with me. It needs to feel.
I wasn't so much unfamiliar with slow tempos, It was more a matter of the restraint required for the songs to be most effective. It had to swing free of ghost notes.
Before moving to New York and joining Codeine, I was living in Portland, Maine playing with a band that would later become Rex. We wrote songs at relatively slow tempos. (We got slower after Curtis Harvey and I went down to Boston to see Codeine's first show.)
Musically, with Codeine, I knew what I was getting into and I knew that I could play it.
DAVID Let´s talk about "The White Birch" Such a profound and groundbreaking work...Thankfully no suicides have been attributed to it, But I truly believe it´s our generation´s "Gloomy Sunday"...How did you get the gig? Was it true the band couldn´t find a drummer to play slow enough? Where was it recorded? What was the mood like During the sessions? How do you maintain such meticulous tempos?...Did you guys joke around at all...? I´m fascinated...
DOUG:
The making of the record was complicated well before I was ever in the band. I believe it was the second try at making The White Birch. I wasn't yet in the band for the initial attempt which resulted in the e.p. Barely Real.
The band was looking for someone to replace Josh Madell from Antietam. He was filling in after Chris Brokaw left to play guitar with Come full time.
I called Chris, who I met through Curtis Harvey. He gave me a number for John Engle who was living in Hoboken. I had left Portland and was living Brooklyn by this time.
I woke John up at 1:00 in the afternoon with a call asking for an audition. I auditioned once or twice but didn't get the job. They chose a drummer from Richmond, Va. who they hadn't played with before. It was a gamble.
Unfortunately, he wasn't quite up to it. The kid took off in the middle of the night leaving them a note saying something about missing his mom and his cat. (fair enough)The band found themselves away from New York, in Louisville, with a tour and recording session booked, but without a drummer.
Stephen called and asked me to come there for a month of rehearsals.
I put my things in storage and left Brooklyn driving the 10-11 hours overnight. Listening to nothing but the records and demos, I used the time to learn every arrangement and get inside of the songs.
In Louisville, we rehearsed for 5-6 hours a day, 6 days a week. We might have played some shows on our way to Chicago's Idful studios where we were booked to record the 5 or 6 basic tracks we had ready for the record.
The studio, in a corner of a Damen ave strip mall was relatively new and unassuming. They had a 16 track tape deck. can't remember if it was a 1" or 2" machine at the time. in any case, the machine shit the bed on us not long after we had set up. Can't recall how it all transpired. We might have been listening back or trying to record the first track. There was an issue with the machines transport or playback head. Anyway, it was spent and our frustrated producer along with the guys who ran the studio went on a mad scramble around Chicago looking for a replacement.
I played basketball across the street in Wicker Park. It took 2 or 3 days to sort out a machine to record on. We had to settle, much to the dissatisfaction of all, on 3 ADAT machines. It's a testament to how good the Idful live room sounded and Mike McMackin that those basics sound so good.
I really loved playing in that room and eventually would make 2 other records there. The session at Idful would produce about half of the basic tracks for the White Birch. From there we played our way back to NYC where I found myself homeless. I did some couch surfing and stayed for some nights outside on the fire escape of John and his girlfriends studio apartment.
We were then asked to tour as support for the Flaming Lips. That was a three week tour which was almost immediately followed by a month in support of Mazzy Star. It was over this period, mostly at sound checks, that the remaining songs for The White Birch were written, rehearsed and arranged.
After the tours a studio was located near New Haven, Ct., where Steve was living, called 3 communications. It was convenient, location-wise, and was an ADAT studio. The contrast to Idful couldn't have been more immediate. Dropped ceilings in a room that most likely once served as a windowless office selling cheap insurance.
The drums sounded like hell in there and I remember struggling with the tracking. There was a feeling that if the session hadn't produced suitable basics, then the record might never happen. The vocals we completed along with the mix at Mike McMackin's apartment in Park Slope. Over the course of this period, I remember the atmosphere was usually pretty tense. It's easy to vent frustrations on the new guy, so I did my best to keep my distance and focus on doing my job. I think it was a really difficult period for Steve. I think he put a mountain of expectations on himself.
I don't remember him smiling very often until we were almost done mixing the record. We stood outside on the steps of McMackin's flat and Steve was loose and seemingly happy. He looked different in that light. He told me he was really pleased with the end result.
DAVID: You´ve been involved with an impressive array of artists from Rex to june of 44, HiM and far beyond... was there a particular high point?
DOUG: Without a doubt, the 90's were a great time to be involved in the indie rock scene. There were so many bands, some of them quite good. lot's of them with good people involved. It was exciting. I was on tour or working on recordings year round. There was a broad network to support a band. CD's were fairly new. You could make a humble living. I was doing exactly what I wanted to do. playing a lot of music and traveling. As far as particular recordings are concerned, the making of Rex 'C' in Chicago at Idful still remains my favorite recording
DAVID: You´ve been really brave and outspoken about your political leanings...Where do you see the world in 50 years?... What do we have to do to give the next generation a snowball´s chance in hell?
DOUG: Idiocracy. have you seen Idiocracy? I just don't think it's going to take until 2525 for people to start watering their lawns with gatorade or for someone out of professional wrestling to become president. I mean, that's funny shit. but in truth, it's not funny at all.
The religion of money truly is the root of all evil…. don't you think?
How can we as a people have this form of capitalism and still be wanting more children?
What's left? A society is so massively disconnected from the very world that we were created out of that we can no longer survive in it?
espousing democracy all the while shitting on it's principles and still be saying "one nation under God"?
Who's God? Give me a fucking break.
Hypocrites and parasites.
I have kids of my own and so I fight to keep the optimism alive. I owe it to them. But it's increasingly difficult.
I'm not angry.
DAVID: You always seemed like a heavy spiritual cat to me...Do you have any thoughts on those matters? You´ve managed to stay really young looking...I can´t help but think you are doing something healthy..any meditation, yoga.. any particular spiritual path ?...It seems to me your work comes partially from somewhere else...not of this earth...
DOUG: I don't know where my work comes from other than the desire and determination to make it. It's a continuous process. Once I feel something is complete or close enough to put a rough mix down, I'll look through the hard drives for something new or take a riff and build on it. If it holds my attention for long enough and I feel it has potential, then I'll see where it takes me.
It's essential to allow for the music to lead.
If you let it, it will.
Music IS spiritual. It's the only spiritually tangible, non thing that I don't know.
As far as looking young. I try to balance a healthy mix of diet, exercise and intoxicating substances. Or maybe I've just been lucky.
DAVID: What are your current projects? is HiM still active?
DOUG: It's not inactive. but I'm continuously working on music. I have a record coming out in November under my name.
A first.
It's called 'Kate No Longer'.
OFF record label out of Brussels will be doing a limited amount of cd's as well as a digital release.
DAVID: You´ve always resisted the slowcore / sadcore tags... It´s impossible to catagorize your lifes work but...Are you comfortable with "Post Rock"? .Or any of the genres that were associated with that era of music history..
DOUG: I'd like it to be categorized as nice folks music. you could go to that section of the record store (do those still exist?) and other nice folks would be there listing to records. no assholes would go over there. you could listen to all kinds of interesting music and nobody would bother you. you might even find something unexpected that you really like.
DAVID: For me "The White Birch" was the perfect blend of Beauty and Sadness...I think a lot of people felt the same...Is there a relationship in your mind? Can we have beauty or joy in our lives without sadness and suffering?
DOUG: If we did, we wouldn't know what we had.
There has to be a contrast or conflicting elements. light and dark. Sound and silence, ebony and ivory man!
there's conflict in Codeine music on a number of levels. In music, it's the space that make the notes that are played matter.
There is a lot of space in that music.
DAVID: Any final thoughts, words of wisdom? Sure do appreciate your time and insight, Thanks so much Doug...So grateful....
DOUG: Find your way with all your heart and stay true to it. in other words, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.
Thank You David. Hope we can meet up soon.....
February 12, 2013
"Happy Beginning" new 5 ★ Amazon Review
"Happy Beginning"
February 12, 2013
5.0 out of 5 ★´s
"When you decide to be an outlaw, you gotta stick with it or you're gonna fall flat on the chopping block at some point. You have to embrace the darkness and start dropping bombs on everything you see. This is a life you won't hear about in school, or on the news, or in the official history...it's where David Rat lives. He exists in the sideways glances of everybody on the crappy bright streets; he runs with the hogs and when the night is over, he eats their hearts to live just...a little bit...longer; he is in the dungeon of rock and roll--c'mon down, at once! Yeah it smells like vomit, it's way too hot, and way too loud but it's the only way to redeem yourself after listening to NPR all morning. That's where David Rat is...or rather, was.
So what is a happy ending? Maybe it's the sure end to suffering that David hints at. Maybe it's just the end of another day when you've tricked yourself into thinking you're still alive. Or maybe it's the idea that people can change the world they inhabit. Because in the midst of all this bleakness, there is a tiny glowing atom which may grow into something unexpected.
Rat is easily one of the most fantastic drummers on Earth...but that is not going to save his life. It might save yours though, because that's what rock and roll is for. Rarely does a disciple of the rock church destroy the spectrum of aural joy and then write about it well. David Rat does..."
- douq ep- (verified amazon purchaser)
February 12, 2013
5.0 out of 5 ★´s
"When you decide to be an outlaw, you gotta stick with it or you're gonna fall flat on the chopping block at some point. You have to embrace the darkness and start dropping bombs on everything you see. This is a life you won't hear about in school, or on the news, or in the official history...it's where David Rat lives. He exists in the sideways glances of everybody on the crappy bright streets; he runs with the hogs and when the night is over, he eats their hearts to live just...a little bit...longer; he is in the dungeon of rock and roll--c'mon down, at once! Yeah it smells like vomit, it's way too hot, and way too loud but it's the only way to redeem yourself after listening to NPR all morning. That's where David Rat is...or rather, was.
So what is a happy ending? Maybe it's the sure end to suffering that David hints at. Maybe it's just the end of another day when you've tricked yourself into thinking you're still alive. Or maybe it's the idea that people can change the world they inhabit. Because in the midst of all this bleakness, there is a tiny glowing atom which may grow into something unexpected.
Rat is easily one of the most fantastic drummers on Earth...but that is not going to save his life. It might save yours though, because that's what rock and roll is for. Rarely does a disciple of the rock church destroy the spectrum of aural joy and then write about it well. David Rat does..."
- douq ep- (verified amazon purchaser)
February 10, 2013
HAPPY ENDING AMAZON REVIEWS
"Happy Beginning"
February 12, 2013
5.0 out of 5 ★´s
"When you decide to be an outlaw, you gotta stick with it or you're gonna fall flat on the chopping block at some point. You have to embrace the darkness and start dropping bombs on everything you see. This is a life you won't hear about in school, or on the news, or in the official history...it's where David Rat lives. He exists in the sideways glances of everybody on the crappy bright streets; he runs with the hogs and when the night is over, he eats their hearts to live just...a little bit...longer; he is in the dungeon of rock and roll--c'mon down, at once! Yeah it smells like vomit, it's way too hot, and way too loud but it's the only way to redeem yourself after listening to NPR all morning. That's where David Rat is...or rather, was.
So what is a happy ending? Maybe it's the sure end to suffering that David hints at. Maybe it's just the end of another day when you've tricked yourself into thinking you're still alive. Or maybe it's the idea that people can change the world they inhabit. Because in the midst of all this bleakness, there is a tiny glowing atom which may grow into something unexpected.
Rat is easily one of the most fantastic drummers on Earth...but that is not going to save his life. It might save yours though, because that's what rock and roll is for. Rarely does a disciple of the rock church destroy the spectrum of aural joy and then write about it well. David Rat does..."
"Because Every Life Matters"
February 9, 2013
5 out of 5 ✭`s
Read the book in one sitting. It was a poignant journey through the morass of addiction and hopelessness that emerges in the end with a message of tenacity and hope and a new-found love for life. It's hard to imagine a lifestyle of death unless you've lived in and through addiction. In this collection of dark memories, interspliced with colorful images of a life seeking the art it was designed to present, David takes the reader on a journey of self-debasement, broken promises, and eventually to the light that was always waiting at the end of the tunnel. There is no way to present it without entering the shaking, feverish nightmare it was. And yet, there were always glimpses of paradise that drove the author forward despite addiction's debilitating mockery of happiness.
It reminds its readers that every life matters - even the life of a junkie. David Rat is alive and well and the world is a better place because of that life!
"Review of David Rat's
Happy Ending"
February 6, 2013
4 out of 5 ✭´s
I was so moved, by this book, I wept....It was brilliant !..David transports you to his world, his pain, his emptiness, and the abyss.. in himself. To a complete... real life.. "Happy Ending". I wanted more of this very talented artist's ' words.. that became images... and visions "..Haunting..beautiful..painful..raw..."...A "must read".......
"The Honest Truth"
January 9, 2013
5 out of 5 ✭´s
With prose befitting poetry, David Rat shares the heaven and hell of a "Junkies Lament." The painted picture reveals an honest glimpse of the hell and hope every junkie lives on a daily basis.
But that is not what this is about. A deeper read reveals a slice of humanity at its rawest level.
It reveals the strength and spirituality of a good soul, simply along for the ride.
David carries the reader down a dark alley; one littered with lost lives, lost loves, and lost souls. He shares the secret unknown to most, "there but for the grace of god go I." Believe it!
But don't despair through the tears of this read. For in the end, it is really about redemption and the rising of a soul. I found it to be an excellent read and roadmap for the important things in life.
For David:
A junkie's sick
A monkey's strong
That's what's wrong
Oh my god, a monkey can move a man
Send him to hell
And home again
With an empty hand in the afternoon
Shooting for the moon
~ James Taylor A Junkies Lament
"Courageous, profound and hauntingly beautiful"
December 27, 2012
5 out of 5 ✭´s
A raw and intense account of the horrors of drug addiction and one artist who found the strength to pull himself out. David's words rip into one's soul. They are brutal and honest. One can feel the agony, rejection and hopelessness that he felt over and over again, yet somehow he hung on, and found a way out. It's a story of hope against all odds, the strength to survive and get clean - a strength fueled by the birth of his son, James. David is a true poet who bared his soul and turned his pain into a beautiful book, a Happy Ending. A must read!
"Happy Ending by David Rat"
December 22, 2012
5 out of 5 ✭´s
I'm always happy to meet up with an author who has walked a few blocks on the dark side of the street. David Rat is that author. David Rat descended, like Orpheus, into an abyss, and he came up with his hands full of pearls. Drummer for the seminal art noise band Rat At Rat R, which he formed along with guitarist Victor Poison-tete in 1981, David Rat was well on his way to rock and roll stardom. Now along comes junk--heroin--smack--and David's rock and roll dreams go straight into the toilet. "The disease crept in with the new dawn / with a slap seemingly from God's hand / I was awake...the smell of cat urine and lilac filled the air / `I'm freaking sick,' I groaned to no one."
David Rat has seen what's at the bottom of the well. In a sense, he made the trip so that you and I don't have to go. Happy Ending is not a novel or a novella or even a poem. Happy Ending is a human document, the chronicle of one man's dark night of the soul. David Rat tells it like it is. He opens his veins--collapsed though they may be--on the keyboard, and pours out his anguish and remorse--the story of his addiction--in tarnished but glittering images that are reminiscent of Les Poètes maudits, of Rimbaud and Baudelaire. "I'm walking around dead / twenty years of bashing my veins / red stains in the bathroom sink..." In Happy Ending we're with David Rat kicking heroin on the concrete floor of a jail cell, trying to hide from jagged shards of light that are tearing him apart, "puking, shaking, tremors, too hot, too cold, can't sleep, moaning...you meet a side of yourself you never knew."
Like Orpheus, whose voice charmed the birds out of the trees, David Rat is a musician, a poet, an artist. Thus his journey to the dark side was not simply a slam-dunk into a charnel pit, but a transformative experience. Everyone wants to be reborn, but there's a catch: in order to be reborn, first you have to die. And only a few--like David Rat--are trusting enough or desperate enough to simply let go.
Twenty years of heroin addiction left David Rat a shot-out wreck of a man, "a junkie with ghosts in his eyes," but with Happy Ending he has emerged into the light to sing for us.
"Happy Ending is excellent,a must read, an artist's struggle"
November 20, 2012
5 out of 5 ✭´s
This poignant book flows with the words of a true poet and writer. It seems to come from the deepest darkest places that can touch all of us no matter where we are and what we have experienced. It is a voice of pain and suffering and deep emotion sprinkled with humor and clarity and intelligence and magic, a balm for the soul, a struggle for this artist with his drug addiction and his honesty, his music and the fight for his life to overcome--- his deep love for his young son, and he puts it all into words that are satisfying emotionally to all of us readers, hungry for an understanding of his journey ..And with great hope for his brilliant future...
"A Dark and compelling read"
November 14, 2012
4 out of 5 ✭´s
My first thought when I finished this book was wow. I was blown away. This memoir not only packs a punch, but keeps you intrigued and reading more to see what will happen. I was captivated from page one and my attention was kept throughout the entire book. I couldn't put it down and had to read it in one sitting.
I found the words on the cover and the image to be very contradicting. How can needles have a happy ending? They almost always have a negative connotation and bring bad news. The cover art was creative and had a stark contast between the colors and the white background. It is an intriguing cover that captures your attention.
The prose was very well written and each verse broke my heart. The writing was so compelling and vivid, and stated everything bluntly. No sugar coating here. With every word that I read, I could feel the emotion that the author felt, I felt the heartbreak and the pain. The writing was done in a way that each word was not wasted, and the short verses had twice the impact of the long ones.
The author's story tells of heart breaks, loves won and lost, fame and fortune and the dark world of drugs. It seemed as though everytime David Rat got out, something else would bring him down back to the drugs. However, the one thing that finally got him out completely was his son. His love for him was no match for the drugs.
This was a dark book that I usually don't read and it was a change of pace from what I have been reading lately. It definitely brought a new perspective to the world around me. I know that drugs and rehab exist and the dangers of them. However, the way that this memoir was written made it seem so much closer to home than usual. For anyone who has ever known of a drug addict or has been affected, I would recommend this book. The pain and struggle that resonates with each word as it is read just grabs hold of you and won't let you go. Not until you finish it all.
"It's poetry...like you've never seen before"
November 12, 2012
5 out of 5 ✭´s
"Happy Ending" is a rare gem - a brave, poetic and anguished tale. David Rat's minimalist style is vivid, compelling, and fluid. It's not a story for the self-righteous or the faint of heart. No sugar coating here, but unadulterated reality...one man's rise, fall, and redemption, as told by a true modern poet. In page after page, the reader encounters single lines that stand out and could become themes for entire songs. It's frightening to realize that addiction can and often does victimize almost anyone given the wrong set of circumstances. Maybe someone you know. Surely there's, "...a little part of it in everyone." Walk a rugged mile in someone else's shoes, see into another side of life, and experience this hard-hitting book...
"For those of us who have been there and came out better for it"
November 8, 2012
5 out of 5 ✭´s
The book is a drugies look back on the cost and pain of addiction. As tragic as it is; the silver lining shines through from a spirt that wouldn't sink. Moving and artful in it's delivery. You would have to be a very hard case to not be touched...
"Dark & Depressing!"
November 3, 2012
2 out of 5 ✭´s
This book was very dark and depressing. I think it would be good for his son to read it someday so that he knows that his father loved him. I feel bad for the author. Would I recommend this book to others? Not really. People that don't do drugs don't want to read about that agony people that go through when they take the drugs. People that do take drugs wouldn't want to read this because its depressing enough to make you want to take drugs if you already do.
It was well written though even if I don't care for the content....
February 12, 2013
5.0 out of 5 ★´s
"When you decide to be an outlaw, you gotta stick with it or you're gonna fall flat on the chopping block at some point. You have to embrace the darkness and start dropping bombs on everything you see. This is a life you won't hear about in school, or on the news, or in the official history...it's where David Rat lives. He exists in the sideways glances of everybody on the crappy bright streets; he runs with the hogs and when the night is over, he eats their hearts to live just...a little bit...longer; he is in the dungeon of rock and roll--c'mon down, at once! Yeah it smells like vomit, it's way too hot, and way too loud but it's the only way to redeem yourself after listening to NPR all morning. That's where David Rat is...or rather, was.
So what is a happy ending? Maybe it's the sure end to suffering that David hints at. Maybe it's just the end of another day when you've tricked yourself into thinking you're still alive. Or maybe it's the idea that people can change the world they inhabit. Because in the midst of all this bleakness, there is a tiny glowing atom which may grow into something unexpected.
Rat is easily one of the most fantastic drummers on Earth...but that is not going to save his life. It might save yours though, because that's what rock and roll is for. Rarely does a disciple of the rock church destroy the spectrum of aural joy and then write about it well. David Rat does..."
"Because Every Life Matters"
February 9, 2013
5 out of 5 ✭`s
Read the book in one sitting. It was a poignant journey through the morass of addiction and hopelessness that emerges in the end with a message of tenacity and hope and a new-found love for life. It's hard to imagine a lifestyle of death unless you've lived in and through addiction. In this collection of dark memories, interspliced with colorful images of a life seeking the art it was designed to present, David takes the reader on a journey of self-debasement, broken promises, and eventually to the light that was always waiting at the end of the tunnel. There is no way to present it without entering the shaking, feverish nightmare it was. And yet, there were always glimpses of paradise that drove the author forward despite addiction's debilitating mockery of happiness.
It reminds its readers that every life matters - even the life of a junkie. David Rat is alive and well and the world is a better place because of that life!
"Review of David Rat's
Happy Ending"
February 6, 2013
4 out of 5 ✭´s
I was so moved, by this book, I wept....It was brilliant !..David transports you to his world, his pain, his emptiness, and the abyss.. in himself. To a complete... real life.. "Happy Ending". I wanted more of this very talented artist's ' words.. that became images... and visions "..Haunting..beautiful..painful..raw..."...A "must read".......
"The Honest Truth"
January 9, 2013
5 out of 5 ✭´s
With prose befitting poetry, David Rat shares the heaven and hell of a "Junkies Lament." The painted picture reveals an honest glimpse of the hell and hope every junkie lives on a daily basis.
But that is not what this is about. A deeper read reveals a slice of humanity at its rawest level.
It reveals the strength and spirituality of a good soul, simply along for the ride.
David carries the reader down a dark alley; one littered with lost lives, lost loves, and lost souls. He shares the secret unknown to most, "there but for the grace of god go I." Believe it!
But don't despair through the tears of this read. For in the end, it is really about redemption and the rising of a soul. I found it to be an excellent read and roadmap for the important things in life.
For David:
A junkie's sick
A monkey's strong
That's what's wrong
Oh my god, a monkey can move a man
Send him to hell
And home again
With an empty hand in the afternoon
Shooting for the moon
~ James Taylor A Junkies Lament
"Courageous, profound and hauntingly beautiful"
December 27, 2012
5 out of 5 ✭´s
A raw and intense account of the horrors of drug addiction and one artist who found the strength to pull himself out. David's words rip into one's soul. They are brutal and honest. One can feel the agony, rejection and hopelessness that he felt over and over again, yet somehow he hung on, and found a way out. It's a story of hope against all odds, the strength to survive and get clean - a strength fueled by the birth of his son, James. David is a true poet who bared his soul and turned his pain into a beautiful book, a Happy Ending. A must read!
"Happy Ending by David Rat"
December 22, 2012
5 out of 5 ✭´s
I'm always happy to meet up with an author who has walked a few blocks on the dark side of the street. David Rat is that author. David Rat descended, like Orpheus, into an abyss, and he came up with his hands full of pearls. Drummer for the seminal art noise band Rat At Rat R, which he formed along with guitarist Victor Poison-tete in 1981, David Rat was well on his way to rock and roll stardom. Now along comes junk--heroin--smack--and David's rock and roll dreams go straight into the toilet. "The disease crept in with the new dawn / with a slap seemingly from God's hand / I was awake...the smell of cat urine and lilac filled the air / `I'm freaking sick,' I groaned to no one."
David Rat has seen what's at the bottom of the well. In a sense, he made the trip so that you and I don't have to go. Happy Ending is not a novel or a novella or even a poem. Happy Ending is a human document, the chronicle of one man's dark night of the soul. David Rat tells it like it is. He opens his veins--collapsed though they may be--on the keyboard, and pours out his anguish and remorse--the story of his addiction--in tarnished but glittering images that are reminiscent of Les Poètes maudits, of Rimbaud and Baudelaire. "I'm walking around dead / twenty years of bashing my veins / red stains in the bathroom sink..." In Happy Ending we're with David Rat kicking heroin on the concrete floor of a jail cell, trying to hide from jagged shards of light that are tearing him apart, "puking, shaking, tremors, too hot, too cold, can't sleep, moaning...you meet a side of yourself you never knew."
Like Orpheus, whose voice charmed the birds out of the trees, David Rat is a musician, a poet, an artist. Thus his journey to the dark side was not simply a slam-dunk into a charnel pit, but a transformative experience. Everyone wants to be reborn, but there's a catch: in order to be reborn, first you have to die. And only a few--like David Rat--are trusting enough or desperate enough to simply let go.
Twenty years of heroin addiction left David Rat a shot-out wreck of a man, "a junkie with ghosts in his eyes," but with Happy Ending he has emerged into the light to sing for us.
"Happy Ending is excellent,a must read, an artist's struggle"
November 20, 2012
5 out of 5 ✭´s
This poignant book flows with the words of a true poet and writer. It seems to come from the deepest darkest places that can touch all of us no matter where we are and what we have experienced. It is a voice of pain and suffering and deep emotion sprinkled with humor and clarity and intelligence and magic, a balm for the soul, a struggle for this artist with his drug addiction and his honesty, his music and the fight for his life to overcome--- his deep love for his young son, and he puts it all into words that are satisfying emotionally to all of us readers, hungry for an understanding of his journey ..And with great hope for his brilliant future...
"A Dark and compelling read"
November 14, 2012
4 out of 5 ✭´s
My first thought when I finished this book was wow. I was blown away. This memoir not only packs a punch, but keeps you intrigued and reading more to see what will happen. I was captivated from page one and my attention was kept throughout the entire book. I couldn't put it down and had to read it in one sitting.
I found the words on the cover and the image to be very contradicting. How can needles have a happy ending? They almost always have a negative connotation and bring bad news. The cover art was creative and had a stark contast between the colors and the white background. It is an intriguing cover that captures your attention.
The prose was very well written and each verse broke my heart. The writing was so compelling and vivid, and stated everything bluntly. No sugar coating here. With every word that I read, I could feel the emotion that the author felt, I felt the heartbreak and the pain. The writing was done in a way that each word was not wasted, and the short verses had twice the impact of the long ones.
The author's story tells of heart breaks, loves won and lost, fame and fortune and the dark world of drugs. It seemed as though everytime David Rat got out, something else would bring him down back to the drugs. However, the one thing that finally got him out completely was his son. His love for him was no match for the drugs.
This was a dark book that I usually don't read and it was a change of pace from what I have been reading lately. It definitely brought a new perspective to the world around me. I know that drugs and rehab exist and the dangers of them. However, the way that this memoir was written made it seem so much closer to home than usual. For anyone who has ever known of a drug addict or has been affected, I would recommend this book. The pain and struggle that resonates with each word as it is read just grabs hold of you and won't let you go. Not until you finish it all.
"It's poetry...like you've never seen before"
November 12, 2012
5 out of 5 ✭´s
"Happy Ending" is a rare gem - a brave, poetic and anguished tale. David Rat's minimalist style is vivid, compelling, and fluid. It's not a story for the self-righteous or the faint of heart. No sugar coating here, but unadulterated reality...one man's rise, fall, and redemption, as told by a true modern poet. In page after page, the reader encounters single lines that stand out and could become themes for entire songs. It's frightening to realize that addiction can and often does victimize almost anyone given the wrong set of circumstances. Maybe someone you know. Surely there's, "...a little part of it in everyone." Walk a rugged mile in someone else's shoes, see into another side of life, and experience this hard-hitting book...
"For those of us who have been there and came out better for it"
November 8, 2012
5 out of 5 ✭´s
The book is a drugies look back on the cost and pain of addiction. As tragic as it is; the silver lining shines through from a spirt that wouldn't sink. Moving and artful in it's delivery. You would have to be a very hard case to not be touched...
"Dark & Depressing!"
November 3, 2012
2 out of 5 ✭´s
This book was very dark and depressing. I think it would be good for his son to read it someday so that he knows that his father loved him. I feel bad for the author. Would I recommend this book to others? Not really. People that don't do drugs don't want to read about that agony people that go through when they take the drugs. People that do take drugs wouldn't want to read this because its depressing enough to make you want to take drugs if you already do.
It was well written though even if I don't care for the content....
January 28, 2013
My Review of Secrets of an Old Typewriter.. by Susie Duncan Sexton
5.0 out of 5 stars
"ROBERT FULGHUM WITH A KNIFE IN HER BOOT"
My fix in all things art is CONTRAST..dark and light, sun and moon, life and death..I search for flowers among the garbage and garbage among the flowers....there is no beauty without ugliness and no joy without suffering.. and somewhere in the middle is the truth..encompassing all of these elements..."Secrets of an old Typewriter" by Susie Duncan Sexton is TRUTH...the essence of High Art....
Raised in a small town, in the Midwest, Ms. Sexton was set up for what one would call.."an unremarkable life".. But this twisting telling work is the story of one woman who sought and fought to be better than the often stoic and narrow-minded white bread bastion of freedomless thinkers...chock full of romantic reminders of a time I long for...when my parents were young...soda fountains and knee socks...howdy doody, innocence, and truly legendary icons of our former culture...It is vastly entertaining...I savored every word like a delicious meal...
entranced...transported...
But nostalgia is only one element, a devout Vegan (believe me it's not easy to get your heart and stomach in the same place) A christian with a seeking and questioning nature (the only true christians in my mind)...and (closest to my heart)...a tireless freedom fighter for animal rights...Ms. Sexton is a prime example of The most successful type of human being...a teacher, the noblest of all professions, a Mother,(raising a Son who has followed in her footsteps and is leading a higher evolved existence), and now an exemplary and enlightened author..
I'm only a few decades younger...but I am a Rock and Roll musician and it is my job to maintain a youthful perspective...and I do not believe this is a book whose demographic is only grandma's and baby boomers...I would like to see this work of art be embraced by today's youth...as it is basically a guide to living a good and meaningful life..
Do not expect to be coddled..Susie could give a damn if you agree with her unique and sometimes abstract vision...she writes from the heart...from her gloriously beautiful soul..and that to me...is a rare quality these days...
Reading this book was a life changing experience for me...given the chance...regardless of age, creed or political views...It is my belief you will reap the same reward..
DAVID RAT..
"ROBERT FULGHUM WITH A KNIFE IN HER BOOT"
My fix in all things art is CONTRAST..dark and light, sun and moon, life and death..I search for flowers among the garbage and garbage among the flowers....there is no beauty without ugliness and no joy without suffering.. and somewhere in the middle is the truth..encompassing all of these elements..."Secrets of an old Typewriter" by Susie Duncan Sexton is TRUTH...the essence of High Art....
Raised in a small town, in the Midwest, Ms. Sexton was set up for what one would call.."an unremarkable life".. But this twisting telling work is the story of one woman who sought and fought to be better than the often stoic and narrow-minded white bread bastion of freedomless thinkers...chock full of romantic reminders of a time I long for...when my parents were young...soda fountains and knee socks...howdy doody, innocence, and truly legendary icons of our former culture...It is vastly entertaining...I savored every word like a delicious meal...
entranced...transported...
But nostalgia is only one element, a devout Vegan (believe me it's not easy to get your heart and stomach in the same place) A christian with a seeking and questioning nature (the only true christians in my mind)...and (closest to my heart)...a tireless freedom fighter for animal rights...Ms. Sexton is a prime example of The most successful type of human being...a teacher, the noblest of all professions, a Mother,(raising a Son who has followed in her footsteps and is leading a higher evolved existence), and now an exemplary and enlightened author..
I'm only a few decades younger...but I am a Rock and Roll musician and it is my job to maintain a youthful perspective...and I do not believe this is a book whose demographic is only grandma's and baby boomers...I would like to see this work of art be embraced by today's youth...as it is basically a guide to living a good and meaningful life..
Do not expect to be coddled..Susie could give a damn if you agree with her unique and sometimes abstract vision...she writes from the heart...from her gloriously beautiful soul..and that to me...is a rare quality these days...
Reading this book was a life changing experience for me...given the chance...regardless of age, creed or political views...It is my belief you will reap the same reward..
DAVID RAT..
January 18, 2013
I´ll not dirty my Art with your Money...
So as I embark on this insane adventure of rekindling my career as an author and a recording artist...I am asking myself what exactly is the meaning of "Art"?..
hmmm....well...for me it was always a search for Truth..I learned that in ninth grade art class.. and to this day it remains the essence for me…and Truth is a rare commodity these days..
So here´s some truth for you... Your wallet is filled with Blood.. The truth is if we all don´t pull together…we´re fucked…The truth is…this is a new world…a world many said was coming to an end, which is in FACT...only just beginning..a world where if we all don´t do what we can..when we can…there is little to no hope…
pray chant meditate all you want…that´s wonderful..positive energy is wonderful!…but without action it´s meaningless…absolutely fucking meaningless…
I was so fortunate to hear his holiness the Dalai Lama speak in central park.. years and years ago…The thing I remember most about that day…the thing I have carried with me all this time was hearing him say…”when you stub your toe in the dark, your hand…instinctively, automatically without a single thought or hesitation goes to rub it…to comfort it…to take away the pain…”
and that´s the way the world needs to be..
When one part of the world is hurting the rest of the world instinctively, automatically without a single thought or hesitation needs to be there to help, to heal…to comfort and alleviate suffering as best we can…”
so I am here to tell you all…I will not dirty my Art with your money…I will not accept one dime for my writing or my music…This fund drive I am in the midst of to help the victims of Hurricane Sandy is only the beginning…next month it will be Castaway Critters, and the month after another.. and on and on...
So for all of January www.songsaftersandy.com will receive %100 of all author proceeds..in addition to the one dollar per sale donated by www.open-bks.com ..So yeah if you have spent or spend $5 to download my book…$3.50 will go to the foundation..same for the paperback...When the new album comes out I will have a similar arrangement with www.Dromedary-Records.com ..
I have always worked to support my art…even when I was signed to CBS/Sony…Now I am at least lucky enough to have a day job I love…teaching English to children…enabling them to communicate internationally…with the hope that together they will realize it´s only our imaginary Governments that want war and not them…
I wrote a book about the bad choices I made and the suffering I endured as a result...now I am ready to turn poison into medicine...Alchemy...
Because honestly, I am part of the %1…I am rich as fuck, in that I have known true love..and been shown true compassion..
and fueled by this I WILL change this fucking world…maybe only a miniscule bit at a time..…but I CAN and I WILL...WATCH ME…
David Rat
hmmm....well...for me it was always a search for Truth..I learned that in ninth grade art class.. and to this day it remains the essence for me…and Truth is a rare commodity these days..
So here´s some truth for you... Your wallet is filled with Blood.. The truth is if we all don´t pull together…we´re fucked…The truth is…this is a new world…a world many said was coming to an end, which is in FACT...only just beginning..a world where if we all don´t do what we can..when we can…there is little to no hope…
pray chant meditate all you want…that´s wonderful..positive energy is wonderful!…but without action it´s meaningless…absolutely fucking meaningless…
I was so fortunate to hear his holiness the Dalai Lama speak in central park.. years and years ago…The thing I remember most about that day…the thing I have carried with me all this time was hearing him say…”when you stub your toe in the dark, your hand…instinctively, automatically without a single thought or hesitation goes to rub it…to comfort it…to take away the pain…”
and that´s the way the world needs to be..
When one part of the world is hurting the rest of the world instinctively, automatically without a single thought or hesitation needs to be there to help, to heal…to comfort and alleviate suffering as best we can…”
so I am here to tell you all…I will not dirty my Art with your money…I will not accept one dime for my writing or my music…This fund drive I am in the midst of to help the victims of Hurricane Sandy is only the beginning…next month it will be Castaway Critters, and the month after another.. and on and on...
So for all of January www.songsaftersandy.com will receive %100 of all author proceeds..in addition to the one dollar per sale donated by www.open-bks.com ..So yeah if you have spent or spend $5 to download my book…$3.50 will go to the foundation..same for the paperback...When the new album comes out I will have a similar arrangement with www.Dromedary-Records.com ..
I have always worked to support my art…even when I was signed to CBS/Sony…Now I am at least lucky enough to have a day job I love…teaching English to children…enabling them to communicate internationally…with the hope that together they will realize it´s only our imaginary Governments that want war and not them…
I wrote a book about the bad choices I made and the suffering I endured as a result...now I am ready to turn poison into medicine...Alchemy...
Because honestly, I am part of the %1…I am rich as fuck, in that I have known true love..and been shown true compassion..
and fueled by this I WILL change this fucking world…maybe only a miniscule bit at a time..…but I CAN and I WILL...WATCH ME…
David Rat
January 8, 2013
Gratitude, Buddha´s and Angels...
I´m thinking my first ever blog post should be about the blessings I´ve received during 2012...was a tumultuous year for me...a lot of struggles, some amazing victories..some obstacles over come and some still looming over head...Greice and I fought so hard to be together...and we have finally won...immigration is a real bitch...borders are bullshit and the fact that some government pawn in a cheap uniform can tear families apart, deny someone (anyone) the chance to experience a different or better way of life, and crush hopes and dreams is a travesty..America of course leads the way in this hateful fear mongering...often inspiring other peaceful nations to reciprocate and make it more difficult for a peace loving yank like me to be with the family I love..
”Imagine there´s no countries”...
anyway, I digress...
I am a Buddhist. which essentially equates to being an atheist, so for me there is no god but the love and compassion deep in our core...but I do believe in Angels..not with wings floating around the imaginary heavens..("Heaven" is right here on earth, if we choose it) but on this microscopic speck of dust we call planet earth...In Buddhism...we simply call them "Buddha´s" or "Bodhisattva´s"..the Buddha nature is inherent in all of us...every animal, Human or otherwise, every tree, every bush, every blade of grass... but it is buried so deep in so many of us we refuse to wake up and acknowledge it...
but I know who you are...i see it in your actions and I see it in your eyes when you walk by me on the street...Here are some of the Buddha´s, The Angels, the Awake, the shining lights I have encountered over the past year and throughout my life who have given me strength to continue through what seems at times an Un-winnable war to simply continue breathing in and out...
My Wife Greice..
who literally saved my life and has stuck by me through thick and thin...fought tirelessly to give me hope for a better life...and although very Ill at times..never gave up on the dream come true we are living now...
My Father in Law Alberto..
I love this man as much as i loved my own Father...in some ways more so..he fought against the destruction of Amazonia (the lungs of the earth) saving countless animals from poachers and dedicating his life to shutting down the logging companies and huge corporations that are intent on destroying this planet...as a result he suffered greatly...but his kind heart and love for humanity and nature won in the end...He treats me as one of his own...he is an inspiration, a mentor, a role model..if I could be one tenth of the man he is...I would consider myself a great success...
My Mother in Law Saisa...who is a Rock, a fortress of strength in which I take refuge everyday..She has accepted me as her own son...and despite our language barrier...when I am troubled...her wisdom and serenity shines through and she always seems to know what to do...An Art teacher all her life...she has and continues to Bring beauty to this world..a shining light...a true Buddha..
My Brother in Law Gregor...who has never accepted one of Greice´s Boyfriends etc, but me...He taught me about the glory of Gremio!..The strength of the true Gaucho!..I treasure every moment I get to spend with him...
My Sister in Law Giane...a Veterinarian with a heart of gold...who has rescued countless animals and saved countless lives...Her and her best friend and my wife took 143 cats from a university research lab...slated for euthanasia. And rehomed every single one of them...just a fraction of the compassion in this womans heart..
My daughter in Law Nathalie..who has helped to fill a hole in my heart the size of the grand canyon, She is smart as a whip..Nearly fluent in four languages..always happy...always kind...she is only 15 and growing up fast...it´s a little dismaying for her Mother and I to see her transforming from a child to a beautiful and empowered young woman so rapidly..But that is the nature of things...and it pales in comparison to the excitement of what lies ahead...she has the intelligence, the kindness, the compassion and the unquenchable thirst for knowledge that it takes to make a real difference...she is my great hope for the future...
Melanie Fisher...a great Buddha whether she knows it or not..She has endured great hardship and loss and is currently facing more obstacles..But keeps a smile on her face, an unshakable sense of humor..in spite of more heartache than one human being is meant to endure...we went to school together...and reunited a few months before I came to Brazil...we instantly became best friends and she was instrumental in helping me get here to realize my dream...she is one of the most selfless people I have ever met and I miss her dearly...
Julie Dulak...one of the most dedicated, tireless fighters for animal rights and rescue I have ever known...she runs her own completely self-funded TNR program and encounters and overcomes much resistance from the ignorant politicians, residents and religious freaks in our hillbilly home town...but her compassion does not stop there...she got me through some very tough times when I was stranded in Buenos Aries..She fights the good fight everyday...I consider her a role model for humanity and one of my very best friends...
Juan Valente..one of the sweetest kindest boys in the world...who took me, a total stranger, into his home and provided me shelter (along with much patience) when I got stuck there...an extremely innovative artist...he executive produced my new album and pretty much made it possible...expect more great things from this young man in the future...He is exactly the kind of human we all need to aspire to become if we are ever to realize our dream of peace on earth..
Danian Colaprette….I don´t know quite how to explain this…twin sons of different mothers?…a magical equation written in the stars? We met through Virginia Blue..another kind-hearted soul..and became instant best friends…he Produced mixed mastered and played on my solo album…Never could have done it without him…he was also instrumental in getting me home to Brazil…now we got this Bernie/Elton thing going…one of our songs we co-wrote is now on a compilation with the surviving Beatles!…when I think of Damien…I think of sheer Magic…and I remind myself that anyone would be a fool not to believe in it..
Fer Spectro, Diana Parsons, Loli Tineo, Arial Pukacz, Samot Buron Demian Drom, Romina Gigena and of course Juan and Damian who were so kind to befriend a stranger in a strange land and play on my solo album…a Handful of extremely talented artists...
Fernando Velazco and Leo Bass…who were so kind to hook me up with a Radio interview and take me out on the town after…Leo was also kind enough to play in my Live Band in Bs As...
Miss Anna and her husband Gustavo from Don Pan Panaderia Av Boyaca 99 Bs As…they make the best Empanada´s in town no lie…More to the point though..sensing I was in a bit of a pickle refused to take a dime from me for their delicious food…Gustavo even threatened to call his friends on the Police Force if I didn´t go there and eat everyday...amazing…in the New York/Paris of South America, creepy cold and lonely at times…these kind people cared for me…they have a son in Miami and I think they believed if they helped me someone in the states would help him if he were in a similar situation..I don´t know how to explain it…except..to truly understand this world is still filled with kindness and compassion…and worth staying alive to experience the sheer beautiful people we stumble upon…
Lisa Mohary and Will Simmons…who´s undying friendship is such a treasure…they gave me the best thanksgiving I´ve had in a long time last year and a wedding gift when Greice and I were in trouble that made a huge difference in our struggle…
Denis and Thomas our lovely neighbors who helped us care for Lady and took Greice to the Hospital when she was here alone and in trouble…such sweet and courageous boys…always a sweet hug and kiss for us which always puts a smile on my face…Love you guys…
Chad Divel…my Nephew and friend since he was a little feller…when he started to draw me pictures of rock stars with his crayons at age 5…I predicted he would become an amazing artist and for once I was right…he is one of the most brilliant visual artists I have ever come across…what´s more the man he has become has a heart of gold..he stuck by me when everyone else threw me away..I owe him my life…
David Ross and Kelly Huddleston from Open Books…who saw something in my writing and encourage me everyday…in a world where poetry books just don´t sell they convinced me mine was worth publishing anyway…saving me from a tiny conservative market they took me global…and we are exceeding our expectations…also through allowing me to organize my current and future fund drives for charity…they are making it possible for my art…as maudlin and emo as it may be, to do a little bit of good for the world…instead of simply making people cry…
Al Crisafulli from Dromedary Records…who, in a world where no one has any money, let alone money to invest in Art…believed in me enough to sign a beat up old rock and roll cowboy…fully knowing we´ll be lucky to break even in the midst of a global financial crisis where nobody buys music anymore…but in the labels 20 year history…he has always released music he believes in…with no thought of commercial potential or financial gain…the man has lost tens of thousands dollars for the sake of Art…and tirelessly, he soldiers on…
My sister Daun Sattini and My brother Kelsey Warren…who adopted me as Family when I had none…and have been by my side, however far away…through ups and downs…Misery and Bliss..
Elizabeth Freund…who got the big picture way before I did and rocketed to the top of her field… and has been an inspiration to me…never gave up on me…as I celebrate 2 years clean she is one woman I think of as an example of what one can truly accomplish once they conquer their demons and fight tooth and nail for freedom…she is the only women I would chase a bicycle thief down a west village street in my underwear for…(true story) oh and I got the bike back…Ha!
And of course my family in Rat At Rat R…John Myers..one of the most enlightened human beings I have ever met who I am lucky to have known since age 5, Victor Poison-tete, a poet, a prophet and a big brother, and Sonda Andersson, the most beautiful woman in Rock and Roll history..Who´s light shines bigger and brighter than the sun…
Jackie Bender…who is so kind to watch over my ailing Mother and encourage me and promote my art even though her own life is not an easy road… a superfan…one of the few who doesn´t fail to express her love and support for the artists and art she believes on…I am blessed to be one of them…
Roy and Susie Sexton…Susie is an AMAZING author with a rare insight and the courage to speak her mind and not give a damn about what anyone else thinks…she does not coddle her audience…she could care less about offending or alienating any potential readers…It´s more important for her to speak the truth as opposed to selling books…and her son Roy…who has been behind me from the moment we met…with a smile and a kind word for seemingly everyone…a true “Yes” in a world full of maybe´s…
My adopted son David Schmidt…who gave me the honor of proclaiming me his Dad…giving me a sense of worth and purpose…when I feel unloved…I think of him and I know deep in my heart it´s just not true…
Fiona Helmsley…who has been like a sister to me for years…who was kind enough to write the forward to my book…and who is one of the greatest living authors I know…A true rock and roll princess…this woman has been through it…and come out on the other side a great artist and a great mom to boot…
Fritz Ammann…who brought me to Buddhism…an enlightened Buddha in the war zone…a tiny town in north Idaho filled with hateful white racist jesus freaks…most of them with a bible in one hand and a gun in the other…undaunted…he never gives up trying to talk sense to them…to open their minds to accept that the only path to happiness and peace is to love one another..
Tom Moulfair…who saved my life when I was on my way to what have could have been my death fix… In desperation I wandered into a church basement, and he was there…with coffee and comfort…and hasn’t left my side since…for the better part of a decade now he has continually reiterated to me… “Your Life Counts”..I am finally starting to understand that maybe he is right…
Michael Alago...a true rock and roll visionary and brilliant artist in his own right..he negotiated my book deal...gave me the thumbs up on my record deal...he is my "go to guy" in all things art...but more than that...the light that radiates from this kind hearted gentleman is blinding...
And finally, my son James…who is not with me..But is my heart of hearts..Don´t know how much longer I can live without him…but when I think of hurting myself or giving up…he is always there…in my day dreams…whispering in my ear…”it´s ok Daddy, It´s ok…...
DAVID RAT -1/8/2013
”Imagine there´s no countries”...
anyway, I digress...
I am a Buddhist. which essentially equates to being an atheist, so for me there is no god but the love and compassion deep in our core...but I do believe in Angels..not with wings floating around the imaginary heavens..("Heaven" is right here on earth, if we choose it) but on this microscopic speck of dust we call planet earth...In Buddhism...we simply call them "Buddha´s" or "Bodhisattva´s"..the Buddha nature is inherent in all of us...every animal, Human or otherwise, every tree, every bush, every blade of grass... but it is buried so deep in so many of us we refuse to wake up and acknowledge it...
but I know who you are...i see it in your actions and I see it in your eyes when you walk by me on the street...Here are some of the Buddha´s, The Angels, the Awake, the shining lights I have encountered over the past year and throughout my life who have given me strength to continue through what seems at times an Un-winnable war to simply continue breathing in and out...
My Wife Greice..
who literally saved my life and has stuck by me through thick and thin...fought tirelessly to give me hope for a better life...and although very Ill at times..never gave up on the dream come true we are living now...
My Father in Law Alberto..
I love this man as much as i loved my own Father...in some ways more so..he fought against the destruction of Amazonia (the lungs of the earth) saving countless animals from poachers and dedicating his life to shutting down the logging companies and huge corporations that are intent on destroying this planet...as a result he suffered greatly...but his kind heart and love for humanity and nature won in the end...He treats me as one of his own...he is an inspiration, a mentor, a role model..if I could be one tenth of the man he is...I would consider myself a great success...
My Mother in Law Saisa...who is a Rock, a fortress of strength in which I take refuge everyday..She has accepted me as her own son...and despite our language barrier...when I am troubled...her wisdom and serenity shines through and she always seems to know what to do...An Art teacher all her life...she has and continues to Bring beauty to this world..a shining light...a true Buddha..
My Brother in Law Gregor...who has never accepted one of Greice´s Boyfriends etc, but me...He taught me about the glory of Gremio!..The strength of the true Gaucho!..I treasure every moment I get to spend with him...
My Sister in Law Giane...a Veterinarian with a heart of gold...who has rescued countless animals and saved countless lives...Her and her best friend and my wife took 143 cats from a university research lab...slated for euthanasia. And rehomed every single one of them...just a fraction of the compassion in this womans heart..
My daughter in Law Nathalie..who has helped to fill a hole in my heart the size of the grand canyon, She is smart as a whip..Nearly fluent in four languages..always happy...always kind...she is only 15 and growing up fast...it´s a little dismaying for her Mother and I to see her transforming from a child to a beautiful and empowered young woman so rapidly..But that is the nature of things...and it pales in comparison to the excitement of what lies ahead...she has the intelligence, the kindness, the compassion and the unquenchable thirst for knowledge that it takes to make a real difference...she is my great hope for the future...
Melanie Fisher...a great Buddha whether she knows it or not..She has endured great hardship and loss and is currently facing more obstacles..But keeps a smile on her face, an unshakable sense of humor..in spite of more heartache than one human being is meant to endure...we went to school together...and reunited a few months before I came to Brazil...we instantly became best friends and she was instrumental in helping me get here to realize my dream...she is one of the most selfless people I have ever met and I miss her dearly...
Julie Dulak...one of the most dedicated, tireless fighters for animal rights and rescue I have ever known...she runs her own completely self-funded TNR program and encounters and overcomes much resistance from the ignorant politicians, residents and religious freaks in our hillbilly home town...but her compassion does not stop there...she got me through some very tough times when I was stranded in Buenos Aries..She fights the good fight everyday...I consider her a role model for humanity and one of my very best friends...
Juan Valente..one of the sweetest kindest boys in the world...who took me, a total stranger, into his home and provided me shelter (along with much patience) when I got stuck there...an extremely innovative artist...he executive produced my new album and pretty much made it possible...expect more great things from this young man in the future...He is exactly the kind of human we all need to aspire to become if we are ever to realize our dream of peace on earth..
Danian Colaprette….I don´t know quite how to explain this…twin sons of different mothers?…a magical equation written in the stars? We met through Virginia Blue..another kind-hearted soul..and became instant best friends…he Produced mixed mastered and played on my solo album…Never could have done it without him…he was also instrumental in getting me home to Brazil…now we got this Bernie/Elton thing going…one of our songs we co-wrote is now on a compilation with the surviving Beatles!…when I think of Damien…I think of sheer Magic…and I remind myself that anyone would be a fool not to believe in it..
Fer Spectro, Diana Parsons, Loli Tineo, Arial Pukacz, Samot Buron Demian Drom, Romina Gigena and of course Juan and Damian who were so kind to befriend a stranger in a strange land and play on my solo album…a Handful of extremely talented artists...
Fernando Velazco and Leo Bass…who were so kind to hook me up with a Radio interview and take me out on the town after…Leo was also kind enough to play in my Live Band in Bs As...
Miss Anna and her husband Gustavo from Don Pan Panaderia Av Boyaca 99 Bs As…they make the best Empanada´s in town no lie…More to the point though..sensing I was in a bit of a pickle refused to take a dime from me for their delicious food…Gustavo even threatened to call his friends on the Police Force if I didn´t go there and eat everyday...amazing…in the New York/Paris of South America, creepy cold and lonely at times…these kind people cared for me…they have a son in Miami and I think they believed if they helped me someone in the states would help him if he were in a similar situation..I don´t know how to explain it…except..to truly understand this world is still filled with kindness and compassion…and worth staying alive to experience the sheer beautiful people we stumble upon…
Lisa Mohary and Will Simmons…who´s undying friendship is such a treasure…they gave me the best thanksgiving I´ve had in a long time last year and a wedding gift when Greice and I were in trouble that made a huge difference in our struggle…
Denis and Thomas our lovely neighbors who helped us care for Lady and took Greice to the Hospital when she was here alone and in trouble…such sweet and courageous boys…always a sweet hug and kiss for us which always puts a smile on my face…Love you guys…
Chad Divel…my Nephew and friend since he was a little feller…when he started to draw me pictures of rock stars with his crayons at age 5…I predicted he would become an amazing artist and for once I was right…he is one of the most brilliant visual artists I have ever come across…what´s more the man he has become has a heart of gold..he stuck by me when everyone else threw me away..I owe him my life…
David Ross and Kelly Huddleston from Open Books…who saw something in my writing and encourage me everyday…in a world where poetry books just don´t sell they convinced me mine was worth publishing anyway…saving me from a tiny conservative market they took me global…and we are exceeding our expectations…also through allowing me to organize my current and future fund drives for charity…they are making it possible for my art…as maudlin and emo as it may be, to do a little bit of good for the world…instead of simply making people cry…
Al Crisafulli from Dromedary Records…who, in a world where no one has any money, let alone money to invest in Art…believed in me enough to sign a beat up old rock and roll cowboy…fully knowing we´ll be lucky to break even in the midst of a global financial crisis where nobody buys music anymore…but in the labels 20 year history…he has always released music he believes in…with no thought of commercial potential or financial gain…the man has lost tens of thousands dollars for the sake of Art…and tirelessly, he soldiers on…
My sister Daun Sattini and My brother Kelsey Warren…who adopted me as Family when I had none…and have been by my side, however far away…through ups and downs…Misery and Bliss..
Elizabeth Freund…who got the big picture way before I did and rocketed to the top of her field… and has been an inspiration to me…never gave up on me…as I celebrate 2 years clean she is one woman I think of as an example of what one can truly accomplish once they conquer their demons and fight tooth and nail for freedom…she is the only women I would chase a bicycle thief down a west village street in my underwear for…(true story) oh and I got the bike back…Ha!
And of course my family in Rat At Rat R…John Myers..one of the most enlightened human beings I have ever met who I am lucky to have known since age 5, Victor Poison-tete, a poet, a prophet and a big brother, and Sonda Andersson, the most beautiful woman in Rock and Roll history..Who´s light shines bigger and brighter than the sun…
Jackie Bender…who is so kind to watch over my ailing Mother and encourage me and promote my art even though her own life is not an easy road… a superfan…one of the few who doesn´t fail to express her love and support for the artists and art she believes on…I am blessed to be one of them…
Roy and Susie Sexton…Susie is an AMAZING author with a rare insight and the courage to speak her mind and not give a damn about what anyone else thinks…she does not coddle her audience…she could care less about offending or alienating any potential readers…It´s more important for her to speak the truth as opposed to selling books…and her son Roy…who has been behind me from the moment we met…with a smile and a kind word for seemingly everyone…a true “Yes” in a world full of maybe´s…
My adopted son David Schmidt…who gave me the honor of proclaiming me his Dad…giving me a sense of worth and purpose…when I feel unloved…I think of him and I know deep in my heart it´s just not true…
Fiona Helmsley…who has been like a sister to me for years…who was kind enough to write the forward to my book…and who is one of the greatest living authors I know…A true rock and roll princess…this woman has been through it…and come out on the other side a great artist and a great mom to boot…
Fritz Ammann…who brought me to Buddhism…an enlightened Buddha in the war zone…a tiny town in north Idaho filled with hateful white racist jesus freaks…most of them with a bible in one hand and a gun in the other…undaunted…he never gives up trying to talk sense to them…to open their minds to accept that the only path to happiness and peace is to love one another..
Tom Moulfair…who saved my life when I was on my way to what have could have been my death fix… In desperation I wandered into a church basement, and he was there…with coffee and comfort…and hasn’t left my side since…for the better part of a decade now he has continually reiterated to me… “Your Life Counts”..I am finally starting to understand that maybe he is right…
Michael Alago...a true rock and roll visionary and brilliant artist in his own right..he negotiated my book deal...gave me the thumbs up on my record deal...he is my "go to guy" in all things art...but more than that...the light that radiates from this kind hearted gentleman is blinding...
And finally, my son James…who is not with me..But is my heart of hearts..Don´t know how much longer I can live without him…but when I think of hurting myself or giving up…he is always there…in my day dreams…whispering in my ear…”it´s ok Daddy, It´s ok…...
DAVID RAT -1/8/2013
