Vee Hoffman's Blog, page 2
June 24, 2013
Intimation alert!
Read no further if you want to be thoroughly surprised by everything about Intimation, the third book in the Acclamation series which should be coming out very, very soon (still waiting on a definite release date, please follow @IndieInklings on Twitter for the most up-to-date info as it breaks). However, this is something I feel the need to say because I anticipate many flabbergasted messages from unsuspecting readers.
I'm currently putting the very final touches on the very final pages of Intimation, and it occurs to me that most of the audience is not prepared for the way this book ends.
So allow me to warn you now: it's going to break your heart. It broke my heart to write it, and it's taken sheer force of will to read it over and over as it's gone through editing.
But...
That's why there's a part four!!!
Cheers, kittens.
I'm currently putting the very final touches on the very final pages of Intimation, and it occurs to me that most of the audience is not prepared for the way this book ends.
So allow me to warn you now: it's going to break your heart. It broke my heart to write it, and it's taken sheer force of will to read it over and over as it's gone through editing.
But...
That's why there's a part four!!!
Cheers, kittens.
June 10, 2013
"I wish I could just stop going through transformations"
...I said to a friend via chat tonight, and it made me think about what has triggered creative prosperity in my life vs. what has actually made me happy.
The creative emotional high that fueled me full speed through the writing of Acclamation happened at the expense of basically everything else in my life. Everything was falling apart around me, really, so I suppose I figured "why not?"
The way substance addiction and altered states tear apart some people and their interpersonal relationships, the same thing seemed to happen to me over the course of a couple of years as I devoted myself to writing, only writing, nothing more. Work was a boring, sometimes exhilarating but always predictable interlude between bouts of it. I gave into it fully. I'm still dubious about the payoff, as I sit here years (it has been!) later in a rented room, waiting for the debris to settle yet again and hoping I will land on my feet and I try to rebuild, again.
I've been transforming for about five years. I still have no idea who I am. I've discovered so much, I've awakened so much within myself, I've become more careful and more reckless at the same time, I've LEARNED and I've been trying to reconcile the things I know and the principles I have with how much concession I'm willing to give to people who might not understand that.
It sort of sucks. I was happy before, when I was comfortable. And now I don't even have the capacity to write. I've been moving too fast, while the ideas and the notions of great words fly around in my head, in images and occasionally in passages when I can't do a thing about it.
There's something to be said for ruts, for being stuck, for an existence that seems boring on the surface. Too much tumult has left me bereft. I don't feel like I have much energy to give, right now.
And the most painful thing is that now I have to turn around and look at the swathe I left in my path, while I was in that zone.
The creative emotional high that fueled me full speed through the writing of Acclamation happened at the expense of basically everything else in my life. Everything was falling apart around me, really, so I suppose I figured "why not?"
The way substance addiction and altered states tear apart some people and their interpersonal relationships, the same thing seemed to happen to me over the course of a couple of years as I devoted myself to writing, only writing, nothing more. Work was a boring, sometimes exhilarating but always predictable interlude between bouts of it. I gave into it fully. I'm still dubious about the payoff, as I sit here years (it has been!) later in a rented room, waiting for the debris to settle yet again and hoping I will land on my feet and I try to rebuild, again.
I've been transforming for about five years. I still have no idea who I am. I've discovered so much, I've awakened so much within myself, I've become more careful and more reckless at the same time, I've LEARNED and I've been trying to reconcile the things I know and the principles I have with how much concession I'm willing to give to people who might not understand that.
It sort of sucks. I was happy before, when I was comfortable. And now I don't even have the capacity to write. I've been moving too fast, while the ideas and the notions of great words fly around in my head, in images and occasionally in passages when I can't do a thing about it.
There's something to be said for ruts, for being stuck, for an existence that seems boring on the surface. Too much tumult has left me bereft. I don't feel like I have much energy to give, right now.
And the most painful thing is that now I have to turn around and look at the swathe I left in my path, while I was in that zone.
June 8, 2013
On Being O.G. in the Post-IW Age of Wota
I began blogging on idols and Japanese music about seven years ago. In 2006 I went from being a casual fan of Morning Musume and the Hello!Project idol collective, to touting my sometimes humorous and oftentimes problematic opinions on Livejournal under the moniker "Pink Wota". I still identify with that blogging alias, to a large extent, though finally the gulf between 'wota' and 'idol fan' is gaining some size, and I definitely find myself on the less fanatical, less patriarchal 'idol fan' shore.
When I started blogging, there was no live streaming from Japan. When I started blogging torrents hadn't even picked up steam. What you had to rely on for idol news were a few dedicated blogs and message boards; the parity between news blogs and opinion blogs was obvious (I was an opinion blog -- reacting to news, mostly, or playing with criticism and theory). The hub of International Wota was the touchstone of idol blogging in those days, and you loaded it up religiously to find out the latest.
I loved writing in a time when the learning curve was manageable; which isn't to say the learning curve is impossible these days. However, I will note that the blogging community had become more visible, that information has become more easily accessible, and above all that blogging is now something that is treated as par for the course with having a presence online.
Much more than I want to whine and moan about how the blogging community has become so audacious that I withdrew my hand because I felt like opinions no longer mattered, I want to sit back and express the wonder I feel after this morning's livestream of the *48 sousenkyo.
Being O.G., I'm amazed that I was able to log onto something other than IRC in order to react in real time with other idol fans. I am amazed that it was possible to react in real time. Some notable O.G. idol bloggers saw this future years ago -- a then-far-off reality in which events and concerts and important announcements would beam to us live. It was Pata who posited that the idol group to harness this technology would win.
Last night just made me a more ardent supporter of AKB48 and its sister groups. It made me happy to be an idol fan again. It made me remember the camaraderie I once felt, sharing posts two days after news was finally filtered through translators and double checked for accuracy.
We all got to see the original SKE48 Team E dominate the rankings. We all got to watch as Miyazawa Sae announced that she rejected the concurrent position in AKB48, choosing to remain loyal to SNH48. We all held our breath as Shinoda Mariko announced her graduation, and somehow we were all shocked by it. Our keymashes and Twitter jailings echoed together as Sashihara Rino achieved the impossible.
Seven years ago? Not even a chance. I would have been sleeping. But that feeling was worth it. It wasn't, you see, about getting to see the news first. It was about experiencing it with my fellow idol fans -- people I'd never meet in the place where I live, but people who understand something I love so deeply.
I've been able to be a part -- at the expense of my circadian rhythm -- of two AKB48 milestones this year. The streaming of the Request Hour Live 2013, and now the 5th General Election. Both ended in extraordinary upsets and surprises. And guess what? In both cases, we had a hand in that. We voted. We were able to make our voices heard.
Sometimes it feels like being a Western fan makes you a silent sliver in the supporter pie chart, but as time goes on and technology advances, the *48 family is realizing more than any other idol institution that all fans deserve the right to be a majority.
The days of wota as the majority are numbered. Idols have crossed over.
And my, my, my, does it feel amazing to be a documented part of that.
When I started blogging, there was no live streaming from Japan. When I started blogging torrents hadn't even picked up steam. What you had to rely on for idol news were a few dedicated blogs and message boards; the parity between news blogs and opinion blogs was obvious (I was an opinion blog -- reacting to news, mostly, or playing with criticism and theory). The hub of International Wota was the touchstone of idol blogging in those days, and you loaded it up religiously to find out the latest.
I loved writing in a time when the learning curve was manageable; which isn't to say the learning curve is impossible these days. However, I will note that the blogging community had become more visible, that information has become more easily accessible, and above all that blogging is now something that is treated as par for the course with having a presence online.
Much more than I want to whine and moan about how the blogging community has become so audacious that I withdrew my hand because I felt like opinions no longer mattered, I want to sit back and express the wonder I feel after this morning's livestream of the *48 sousenkyo.
Being O.G., I'm amazed that I was able to log onto something other than IRC in order to react in real time with other idol fans. I am amazed that it was possible to react in real time. Some notable O.G. idol bloggers saw this future years ago -- a then-far-off reality in which events and concerts and important announcements would beam to us live. It was Pata who posited that the idol group to harness this technology would win.
Last night just made me a more ardent supporter of AKB48 and its sister groups. It made me happy to be an idol fan again. It made me remember the camaraderie I once felt, sharing posts two days after news was finally filtered through translators and double checked for accuracy.
We all got to see the original SKE48 Team E dominate the rankings. We all got to watch as Miyazawa Sae announced that she rejected the concurrent position in AKB48, choosing to remain loyal to SNH48. We all held our breath as Shinoda Mariko announced her graduation, and somehow we were all shocked by it. Our keymashes and Twitter jailings echoed together as Sashihara Rino achieved the impossible.
Seven years ago? Not even a chance. I would have been sleeping. But that feeling was worth it. It wasn't, you see, about getting to see the news first. It was about experiencing it with my fellow idol fans -- people I'd never meet in the place where I live, but people who understand something I love so deeply.
I've been able to be a part -- at the expense of my circadian rhythm -- of two AKB48 milestones this year. The streaming of the Request Hour Live 2013, and now the 5th General Election. Both ended in extraordinary upsets and surprises. And guess what? In both cases, we had a hand in that. We voted. We were able to make our voices heard.
Sometimes it feels like being a Western fan makes you a silent sliver in the supporter pie chart, but as time goes on and technology advances, the *48 family is realizing more than any other idol institution that all fans deserve the right to be a majority.
The days of wota as the majority are numbered. Idols have crossed over.
And my, my, my, does it feel amazing to be a documented part of that.
June 7, 2013
Hype
Hello all! I know I've been remiss in updating my blog. Maybe "remiss" isn't even the word. I've been just plain neglectful. I don't know what's possessed me suddenly to update again, but I do know that I'm full of hype and jazz. Despite a grueling work schedule, strange living arrangements, and an impending deadline on Acclamation #3 (that's right!), tonight is one of the most exciting nights of the year for me -- and for any fan of Japanese pop music. That is, the AKB48 sousenkyo election occurs tonight (and by "tonight", I mean tonight in Japan... and 3:15 a.m. in my time zone).
To put it incredibly succinctly, AKB48 is a very successful J-Pop all-girl group that began as a theater-based idol troupe in Akihabara. The girls performed several nights a week in groups and teams of varying sizes, while the name "AKB48" comes from the fact that the group started at 48 members (cue stunned looks). That's nothing compared to today, though -- with over five sister groups throughout Japan, and in Indonesia, China, and Taiwan, the extended 48-family is well, well over 250 members and going strong with its theater-based "idols you can meet" concept.
Every year AKB48 holds a sousenkyo, or general election, to determine the senbatsu (literally "selection") members -- the members who will get to sing the next single. It is essentially a popularity poll, but the hard work and dedication and sheer love these girls show to reach the top is so powerful to me. Seriously, these girls mean the world to my poor little heart.
The election will stream live on YouTube tonight/this morning, and I'm so excited!
Good luck your oshimen, if you have one. If you don't, get acquainted with AKB48! They're amazing, and so much more than the cutesy pop music and kitschy costumes.
To put it incredibly succinctly, AKB48 is a very successful J-Pop all-girl group that began as a theater-based idol troupe in Akihabara. The girls performed several nights a week in groups and teams of varying sizes, while the name "AKB48" comes from the fact that the group started at 48 members (cue stunned looks). That's nothing compared to today, though -- with over five sister groups throughout Japan, and in Indonesia, China, and Taiwan, the extended 48-family is well, well over 250 members and going strong with its theater-based "idols you can meet" concept.
Every year AKB48 holds a sousenkyo, or general election, to determine the senbatsu (literally "selection") members -- the members who will get to sing the next single. It is essentially a popularity poll, but the hard work and dedication and sheer love these girls show to reach the top is so powerful to me. Seriously, these girls mean the world to my poor little heart.
The election will stream live on YouTube tonight/this morning, and I'm so excited!
Good luck your oshimen, if you have one. If you don't, get acquainted with AKB48! They're amazing, and so much more than the cutesy pop music and kitschy costumes.
December 3, 2012
What Not to Write
I forget who it was now, but recently I was joking around with someone that I need to host a reality show much like "What Not to Wear", but called "What Not to Write". In this show I would take promising or not-so-promising young fic writers and whip them into shape.
I can see the first episode now. I walk into your Google Drive and start tossing words aside. Suddenly, I gasp in horror.
"What are these?! " I ask sternly.
When you don't answer, I'm quite happy to fill in the blanks. "Epithets! I've never seen so many epithets! Oh, honey, you need to lose some of these!" I start pruning as I keep talking. "First of all, don't be afraid of pronouns or names! Yes, you're writing a story about two people of the same gender, but that's not a hindrance. Writing is 10% vocabulary and 90% rhythm, sugar! You just need to execute a nice he/name/he/name combination until it sounds natural.
"Now let's look at the less obvious problem, here. You're mentioning an epithet without even establishing! Before you said "he looked at the blond", you'd better have established that son of a bitch as blond! That had better be a point and have a reason, otherwise it's lazy and it's the definition of an epithet (which, by the way, has a negative connotation for a reason!). Do not use epithets to introduce a character as belonging to a specific ethnicity, culture, occupation, etc. without informing the audience of this distinction your own damn self. In fact, ethnic, cultural, and occupational epithets are the worst. They're so unfashionable! Ack, let's just get rid of all of these."
"Can I keep just one?"
"In what context?"
"Well, someone asks 'Who here knows the Lord's prayer?' and then I write 'Loki looked skeptically at his Buddhist friend.'"
"...wait who's Buddhist in your Loki fic?"
"That's not the point!"
"That example is fantastic because it holds context. Now if you'd said 'Loki looked skeptically at the barista,' wow I have no idea why you pulled that out and you should be ashamed of yourself. All you're doing is the author equivalent of pasting a day-glow arrow pointing at another character's head. It lacks grace. Precision. Fashion sense."
"Can I--"
"If you ever refer to Loki as 'the Asgardian' in your fic I will personally find you and put you in a headlock."
...and that would basically be my show.
I can see the first episode now. I walk into your Google Drive and start tossing words aside. Suddenly, I gasp in horror.
"What are these?! " I ask sternly.
When you don't answer, I'm quite happy to fill in the blanks. "Epithets! I've never seen so many epithets! Oh, honey, you need to lose some of these!" I start pruning as I keep talking. "First of all, don't be afraid of pronouns or names! Yes, you're writing a story about two people of the same gender, but that's not a hindrance. Writing is 10% vocabulary and 90% rhythm, sugar! You just need to execute a nice he/name/he/name combination until it sounds natural.
"Now let's look at the less obvious problem, here. You're mentioning an epithet without even establishing! Before you said "he looked at the blond", you'd better have established that son of a bitch as blond! That had better be a point and have a reason, otherwise it's lazy and it's the definition of an epithet (which, by the way, has a negative connotation for a reason!). Do not use epithets to introduce a character as belonging to a specific ethnicity, culture, occupation, etc. without informing the audience of this distinction your own damn self. In fact, ethnic, cultural, and occupational epithets are the worst. They're so unfashionable! Ack, let's just get rid of all of these."
"Can I keep just one?"
"In what context?"
"Well, someone asks 'Who here knows the Lord's prayer?' and then I write 'Loki looked skeptically at his Buddhist friend.'"
"...wait who's Buddhist in your Loki fic?"
"That's not the point!"
"That example is fantastic because it holds context. Now if you'd said 'Loki looked skeptically at the barista,' wow I have no idea why you pulled that out and you should be ashamed of yourself. All you're doing is the author equivalent of pasting a day-glow arrow pointing at another character's head. It lacks grace. Precision. Fashion sense."
"Can I--"
"If you ever refer to Loki as 'the Asgardian' in your fic I will personally find you and put you in a headlock."
...and that would basically be my show.
November 18, 2012
Posture
This being National Give Your Favorite Retail Employee a Hug Week, I'm completely prepared to not get much writing done. I just finished up 12 hours of retail work between my two jobs, and I went from zero to grumpy in six seconds as a result. Pray for Mojo.
Sitting in Starbucks now and wondering how I can further finesse chapter 4 of The Heights. It's going to be an interesting beast; Empire City was all first person with rotating POV characters. The Heights has one major POV character with some oral histories and third person flashbacks thrown in. I think it flows very naturally, despite the jumble it sounds like. At least I sincerely hope so! Now I just have to adequately capture the voice of my new favorite posturing bad boy, Lawrence Holt. He's like a walking dimple with a gun, I just can't.
Meanwhile tomorrow is an extremely special day and it took me nearly the whole of November 18th to realize it! I kept wondering "...what is it about tomorrow?" Any readers of Acclamation know what I'm getting at? :D
Anyway, I'll probably continue to make random notes about my new boys while waiting for my roommate to get off of work.
Also I should really just suck it up and write some Prince of Tennis fanfic, this Yukimura deathfic A/U is never going to go away otherwise. I need to be exorcised of it.
Sitting in Starbucks now and wondering how I can further finesse chapter 4 of The Heights. It's going to be an interesting beast; Empire City was all first person with rotating POV characters. The Heights has one major POV character with some oral histories and third person flashbacks thrown in. I think it flows very naturally, despite the jumble it sounds like. At least I sincerely hope so! Now I just have to adequately capture the voice of my new favorite posturing bad boy, Lawrence Holt. He's like a walking dimple with a gun, I just can't.
Meanwhile tomorrow is an extremely special day and it took me nearly the whole of November 18th to realize it! I kept wondering "...what is it about tomorrow?" Any readers of Acclamation know what I'm getting at? :D
Anyway, I'll probably continue to make random notes about my new boys while waiting for my roommate to get off of work.
Also I should really just suck it up and write some Prince of Tennis fanfic, this Yukimura deathfic A/U is never going to go away otherwise. I need to be exorcised of it.
November 13, 2012
The Phantom and the Fly
Oh, good, an inline blogging system on GR! I was searching for something like this a few days ago when the NaNoWriMo website failed me. I wanted to do some writerly bitching and I didn't want to just inflict it upon my followers on Dreamwidth.
I've been working on The Heights, abortively it could be argued. The story is the sequel to Empire City, which will be available soon on the Indie Inklings website as a serial release (for FREE, people!!). There's a lot I have to slop through to get this thing fully plotted. It's all very complex, not just as a whodunnit but also as a love story. I want to be able to adequately capture the emotions that are so real to to me but which might be lost in the shuffle of the plot.
Since this is my first blog post I'll try not to inundate everyone with too much. I had a lot of things to say the other night, but I'm going to try and stay positive today.
For inspiration (don't laugh) (no, don't) I've been rewatching the same angsty episodes of Prince of Tennis. I'm serious, if anyone ever hits me with the "what are your inspirations?" question, I won't hide behind hipster stuff, I will straight up tell you guys that teenage shonen sports anime really does it for me. Really, though, I'm drowning in feels over here! So I spend three hours in excruciating pain over my favorite characters, and then I tab over to Word and pour those feelings into a treatment of supposedly heartless criminals. Thug life, you guys. Thug life.
If anyone also likes this stupid series and wants to talk about the stupid feels that these stupid boys are wont to inflict, let me know. Because yeah.
Some happiness around here, though. Everyone in Slytherin House (the duplex I share with my two roommates, a gay furry and a snarky Wisconsinite fangirl) is excited about the upcoming holidays! Stay tuned for updates about our misadventures with Wal-Mart holiday decorating!
I've been working on The Heights, abortively it could be argued. The story is the sequel to Empire City, which will be available soon on the Indie Inklings website as a serial release (for FREE, people!!). There's a lot I have to slop through to get this thing fully plotted. It's all very complex, not just as a whodunnit but also as a love story. I want to be able to adequately capture the emotions that are so real to to me but which might be lost in the shuffle of the plot.
Since this is my first blog post I'll try not to inundate everyone with too much. I had a lot of things to say the other night, but I'm going to try and stay positive today.
For inspiration (don't laugh) (no, don't) I've been rewatching the same angsty episodes of Prince of Tennis. I'm serious, if anyone ever hits me with the "what are your inspirations?" question, I won't hide behind hipster stuff, I will straight up tell you guys that teenage shonen sports anime really does it for me. Really, though, I'm drowning in feels over here! So I spend three hours in excruciating pain over my favorite characters, and then I tab over to Word and pour those feelings into a treatment of supposedly heartless criminals. Thug life, you guys. Thug life.
If anyone also likes this stupid series and wants to talk about the stupid feels that these stupid boys are wont to inflict, let me know. Because yeah.
Some happiness around here, though. Everyone in Slytherin House (the duplex I share with my two roommates, a gay furry and a snarky Wisconsinite fangirl) is excited about the upcoming holidays! Stay tuned for updates about our misadventures with Wal-Mart holiday decorating!
