silentauror's Blog, page 264
September 1, 2019
jimmoriartyistyping:Setlock: sitting edition(x)Ben’s dad subconsciously mimicking John yet...
Setlock: sitting edition
(x)
Ben’s dad subconsciously mimicking John yet again, sitting in his chair. I love it!
benedictdaily:
Benedict Cumberbatch was seen riding a vintage...
Benedict Cumberbatch was seen riding a vintage bicycle whilst filming his new movie ‘Louis Wain’ on 28 August, 2019 in London, England [HQ PICS]
Okay but seriously. How can one man be THIS level of dashing on a BICYCLE? Wearing a silly fake moustache? Bikes make everyone look either like total nerds or like they’re in the Tour de France, yet here’s my boy, just dapper af and killing me over here
August 31, 2019
He’s so pretty it hurts ❤❤❤❤❤❤
He’s so pretty it hurts ❤❤❤❤❤❤
Their body language is always so telling. They just...
Their body language is always so telling. They just instinctively tend toward each other, like the other is their natural, gravitational pull. Everything about the way they move around each other suggests an obvious closing of whatever space is between them; it seems both obvious and inevitable that they would move together, that it’s their inherent tendency to do so.
Sexual harassment is a continuum
The thing about sexual harassment is that it’s a continuum. It can be impossible to say where on the continuum each individual act of harassment falls, and yet it’s there. You’re having a conversation with a colleague and it’s all going fine, but then he says one thing that just lands differently and makes you uncomfortable, like a shadow falling across you unexpectedly. Every woman I know could give hundreds or thousands of examples.
I have a colleague that I don’t work directly with at all; we both work at a museum but it’s a huge staff and we work in very different areas. Sometimes I end up taking the same bus as him, which inevitably means that if I manage to not see him and feel like I have to respond to his wave and sit with/near him, then at the very least I’ll end up having to walk from the bus stop to the museum with him. It’s everything from the way he said one day that I’m “too charming for my own good”, when I wasn’t in any way trying to be charming, and certainly not trying to charm him. It’s him gently chastising me for not having found his joke funny (they never are). It’s him asking if I have my staff pass with me because he seemingly forgot his (we’re required to wear them at all times and need them to open pretty much every door we need), and adding that he was “hoping to see me on the bus for that reason alone”, which instantly made it awkwardly obvious that it wasn’t the only reason he was hoping to see me. He’s in his fifties, balding, married with kids, and I am in no way attracted to him, have never once exhibited anything other than the bare minimum of basic friendliness to him (aka, not overt hostility). I’ll be in the study area and he’ll come by and want to know what I’m doing, then not take the hint when I tell him that I’m on one of my precious few study hours and stay there chatting endlessly, despite my monosyllabic answers, until I finally tell him that I need to study and he goes away. He’ll bother me on breaks, wanting to know if I want to go down to the restaurant and get a coffee with him. I always have the built-in reason of having to get back into the galleries right away, but I hate having been asked in the first place.
Not a one of these things are things I can go to HR with and demand that my colleague, who works in an area of that museum that allows him to take long breaks whenever he wants, is not on a strict, hour-by-hour schedule like I am, earns a salary rather than a per-hour wage, and generally has a lot more power than I do, change his behaviour. It sounds petty to say, “I don’t want Paul to ask me out for coffee. He’s married, I’m not interested, and it makes me uncomfortable to be asked”. If another colleague asked the very same thing, I might well be down for that, regardless of their gender or pay grade. It’s because it’s this man, specifically, and his history of saying things that are on that greyscale continuum of exactly what constitutes sexual harassment. Am I afraid that he’d rape me if we left at the same time one day? No. Not at all. He’s basically a decent human being, from what I can tell. But does he make me uncomfortable? Yes. Absolutely.
The whole #metoo movement is huge, and it covers ALL of this stuff, from getting a compliment you didn’t necessarily want, all the way up to full-on assault. It’s not enough to say, “it was just a compliment, get over it/be grateful (ugh)/stop being so sensitive”. If someone makes someone uncomfortable, it’s valid. For me, this particular man doesn’t make me uncomfortable enough to mention his behaviour to anyone, and even if it did, I doubt very much that anyone would take it seriously. He’s even said things like, “I don’t suppose you’d complain to HR if I tell you I like that scarf”, etc - like, he knows it’s borderline Not Good behaviour. At least he’s that self-aware. But what about all the other men who make women feel uncomfortable, sometimes deliberately? I just loathe that this is the world we live in. I don’t really have a point here. Just venting a bit.
ben-locked:
perisc0pe:
Benedict Cumberbatch spotted riding a...
Benedict Cumberbatch spotted riding a vintage bicycle on a street in East London whille filming “Louis Wain” 28 Aug 2019.
norrington-hell:
glumshoe:
glumshoe:
Is there anything more nauseating than ‘expensive...
Is there anything more nauseating than ‘expensive heterosexual wedding’ culture?
My dream wedding: outside, illegal fireworks, shoes are optional, mostly potluck, someone’s dressed as a wizard, I get to insult my relatives, hopefully some live music.
Reblogging for every single part of this
silentauror's Blog
- silentauror's profile
- 9 followers
