Bryce Moore's Blog, page 159

Groundhog Day 2017

I am the only person I know in Maine who celebrates Groundhog Day. That is, the only person who throws a party every year on Groundhog Day. I have cultivated some Groundhog Day acolytes who show up to said party year after year and put up with my shenanigans. But as far as inspiring others to throw Groundhog Day parties of their own, I have been woefully inadequate.

Still, every year the decorations come up right after New Year’s. We have quite the collection these days: two signs with Groundhog Day quotes on them, 2 stuffed groundhogs, 1 groundhog hand puppet, a styrofoam groundhog head, several beanie babies, and drawings by the kids. People keep sending groundhog themed things my way, knowing my love of the day.

Why do I celebrate it? Why in the world *not*? It’s a day that I can celebrate however I want. It has no conflicts with other days (except the occasional Superbowl Sunday, but groundhogs love football, so that’s okay). It comes at a time when you need any reason to celebrate you can think of. It’s an excuse to watch a movie and get together. It’s funny.

It’s great.

I’ve been trying to come up with how many times I’ve actually been celebrating the holiday. The film came out in 1993 (ironically, a week and a half after Groundhog Day). I saw it in the theater, as I recall, but it’s not like that marks the start of a holiday tradition. The question is when did I start watching it every year? And I don’t know the answer.

My love for the holiday came from two intersecting points: The movie was awesome, and I really disliked Valentines Day. I remember my freshman year of college telling people that I didn’t celebrate Valentines Day, but rather Groundhog Day, instead. So I think we’ll count that as my official start of a real holiday. A lot of people discover things about themselves when they go to college. I discovered a holiday tradition.

So February 1997 was the first year, followed by a two year hiatus while I was on my mission in Germany. February 2000 I was definitely back at it, and Denisa joined the ranks for February 2001. That means that this year is my nineteenth year. I’ve celebrated in Utah nine times. This is my tenth year celebrating in Maine!

The way I’ve celebrated has changed from year to year. I’ve done family parties. Friend parties. Superbowl parties. Murder mystery parties. Movie parties. We’ve had dinner served. Snacks served. Desserts served. We’ve had Groundhog Games of Skill for the last long while, and those have included quizzes, drawing contests, a haiku contest, sculpture contests, and more. This year we’re doing a white elephant exchange (groundhog themed, of course.)

Really, whatever I come up with and want to do one year, I do. Sometimes it connects to years gone by. Sometimes it doesn’t. I heartily recommend the approach. While I think everyone should celebrate Groundhog Day, I realize not everyone sees the point. But I do believe everyone should pick a day and make that day their own. Maybe you’re more of a Flag Day sort of a person. Or a National Chocolate Covered Raisin gal. Whatever speaks to you, make it your own.

You’ll have a blast.

Happy Groundhog Day, everybody! May all your Punxsutawneys be filled and your winters be repetitive and long.

What Would It Take to Make the Ban Worth It?

As I was in the shower yesterday, a thought occurred to me. (Most good thinking happens in the shower, I’ve found.) Trump’s immigration ban is primarily aimed at keeping America safe. That’s the stated objective, at least. And ignoring for the moment the fact that no refugees or immigrants from the countries that have been hit with the ban have yet to commit any dastardly deeds in America, let’s run with that argument for a bit.

Imagine for a moment that you were the president, and your advisors came to you early on in your presidency, telling you that they’ve developed a new technology that lets them see the future. Not perfectly, but enough to know some general things. Using this tech, they’ve discovered that in the coming year, a terrorist is going to come into the country disguised as a refugee or an immigrant. They’re not sure which country they’ll come in from, but they’ve got it narrowed down to seven.

If the terrorist gets in, it’s certain they’ll be successful in their plans. But your advisors have found a way to prevent it all. Ban all refugees and immigrants from those 7 countries, and you’ll avoid the whole thing.

So basically, imagine for a moment that Trump’s ban is successful in doing what he says he wants it to do.

What would it take for you to feel like the ban was justified? How big of an attack would it have to be? In other words, how many American lives would have to be lost in order for you to be glad the ban happened? For the sake of argument, let’s say that the ban stops the terrorist along with 60,000 refugees from those countries. (To get to that number, I’m using Trump’s estimates. The Obama administration had stated it wanted to let in 110,000 refugees this 2017. After the executive order, the Trump administration  lowered that estimate to 50,000.) Let’s also assume all the immigrants who are kept out aren’t adversely affected, just to keep things simple. We’ll only look at the refugees.

So. 60,000 refugees turned away from our borders, but one “bad dude” also kept out, and one terrorist plot foiled. How many of those refugees end up dying as a result of the ban? I’m picking a number out of a hat, but I’ll try to keep it low. Let’s say 5%. They’re coming from countries that are torn by ISIS and war, after all. So 3,000 of them are going to die if the ban goes into effect.

How big of an attack prevented makes that worthwhile?

I imagine the response to that question will vary widely depending who’s answering it. Some might say that a single American life lost is too many. If we can protect one American, then that balances out any number of non-Americans.

Others might say it should be simple math. If the attack were to kill 3,000 Americans or more, then the ban would be justified. Or maybe it wouldn’t have to kill all 3,000 Americans. Maybe it would be enough to injure them, physically or emotionally.

Or perhaps there’s an equation somewhere in between that fits your answer. 1 American affected equals 10 refugees? 50 refugees?

Keep in mind, 2,996 people died on 9/11. That might allow you to put it in scale as you think this over.

Here’s the thing for me: this is a thought experiment. This is a situation where, for the sake of argument, many assumptions are made. In reality, there’s no way of knowing what will happen with the ban in place or what would have happened if it hadn’t been made. I do know that even if a “bad dude” gets into the country, it isn’t the fault of the refugees and immigrants. I wouldn’t blame them. I’d blame the terrorist.

When I was on my mission in Germany, I got to know many refugees. I went to refugee camps and made friends with a lot of the people there. They were open and friendly to missionaries in a way many Germans  were not. I heard firsthand what life was like in the countries they were fleeing. Bosnia. Sierra Leone. Iran. I talked to people whose family had been butchered in front of them. And sure, now they were in Germany, living in a strange land and often in poor conditions (some of the asylum camps were little more than metal shipping containers with pipes run through them for plumbing and electricity), but they were relatively safe.

And they were people. People just like Germans or Americans. People with dreams and aspirations.

Perhaps it’s due to those experiences I had, but I can’t come up with an equation that answers my question. Not even when the outcome is known ahead of time. Because in reality, there are many ways to track terrorists and keep people safe. Ways that don’t resort to keeping out refugees and immigrants. Ways that allow us to hold our head high as a country. And for these people fleeing countries where their lives are in danger? We might be the one chance they have of safety and a future.

Many Americans like to talk about how awesome our country is. How we’re the land of the free, and how we’re the best in so many categories. How are we doing in taking in refugees? Let’s keep it to Syrian refugees, people fleeing the terrors of ISIS. Here’s how many Syrian refugees different countries have taken in:

Turkey: 1.9 million
Lebanon: 1.1 million
Jordan: 630,000
Iran: 250,000
Egypt: 130,000
Germany: 99,000
Sweden: 65,000
Serbia: 50,000
America: 1,500

In our defense, we have shoved $4.1 billion dollars at the problem, and this was more than a year ago, so perhaps things have improved? But something tells me in an “America First” mindset, that’s not going to be the case.

Anyway. Those are my thoughts this fine morning. I’d like to think America would use its power and wealth and position to do more for the world than just turn a profit and help its own citizens at the expense of everyone else. But maybe I’m in the minority when it comes to how I answer the hypothetical.

A Flaw in My Reading Goal

So the other day I came across a problem the other day. A problem with my reading goal. My past approach to books has been to read into them a bit and then decide if I was going to finish them or not. If I wasn’t loving the book, I’d set it aside and move on to the next novel. This is one of the main reasons that my ratings for books were as high as they were. I’d only rate a book I finished, and I’d only finish a book I liked.

But this year my goal is to read more books. One a week, specifically. And I’ve figured I can get that done by reading 14% of a book each day, give or take. It’s been a stretch for me to find the time to do that, and I’ve definitely had to work so far to get it done. (Although I managed to finish 6 books in January, so I have a bit of a cushion now, which makes me feel much better about things.)

The thing is, this goal doesn’t give me the leeway to just give up on a book 14% or 28% in. If I set a book aside, then I’m also setting aside all of the effort I made of reading that book. I’m supposed to be 70% of the way through a book by Thursday night, but if I set one aside on Tuesday, then I have to really read a ton to be able to make up the lost progress.

So the other day I gave my first 2/10 rating to a book in a long time. A very long time. Because I finished a book I had no desire to read. I’d enjoyed it a bit at the beginning. (It was a sequel to a book I really liked.) But by halfway through, I knew where it was going and I had no desire to go there. I knew it was setting up a third book, and that it was going to cliffhanger, and I already knew there was no way I was going to want to read the third book, so why even bother?

But I was 40% of the way through the book, and I didn’t have time to turn to a different book, so I finished it. It wasn’t fun. On the other hand, it only took me a few days to finish it, since I still had the goal.

In the end, I think the goal still works. I’ll still be reading much more than I was without it, and that’s great. And I think I’ll enjoy many more books. Now and then there will be a bad apple, but as long as I’m careful with what I select, I should be okay.

But I’m not telling you what book it was. Sorry.

If it proves too problematic, I’ll have to change the goal. I could give myself partial credit for a book, I suppose, but I’d really rather not. I want to read entire novels, not a patchwork of pieces. Cross your fingers that it all works out.

How do you motivate yourself to keep doing something you love, despite not having time to do it?

Create Your Own Trump with this Handy Pop Culture Recipe!

I’ve been quiet on Trump for his first real week on the job. Not because I didn’t have anything to say about  him, but rather because there was so much to say I didn’t know where to begin. I’d already thought the man was as awful as you could get as far as prospective presidents went, but even I have been shocked by just how quickly he’s been able to screw up even the most basic of tasks. I’ve been trying to come up with some way of encapsulating just how terrible he’s already proven himself to be, and in the end, I’ve come up with four pop culture references that just might do the trick. Each of them doesn’t work to completely describe Trump as a whole, but added together, maybe the recipe works.

First, take one part Amelia Bedelia. (Except instead of funny misunderstandings, Trump’s purposefully screwing everything up as fast as he can. Also, I have yet to see a delicious cake or pie come from him that manages to make all his screw ups forgiven. That had better be one tasty pie.) Trump seems to have an innate ability shared by Amelia to take things that should be totally, completely simple and easy, and the screw them up in next to no time.

But Amelia is somehow always expected to do a good job. People keep putting her in charge and thinking the house won’t be in ruins before she comes home. Let’s be honest. Trump wasn’t like that. So many of us knew what he was going to do ahead of time. So to keep the recipe going, add in a good amount of Chunk (from The Goonies). Chunk’s the guy you give something to if you want it broken. Good ol’ reliable Chunk.

The problem is that Amelia and Chunk are both sympathetic characters. We like them, and any good recipe for a Trump is going to have to get rid of that trait pronto. The solution? Stir in some fava beans and a nice chianti.

Now we’re cooking with gas! Hannibal the Cannibal is just about where Trump’s morals lie. But the problem is he’s too personal. He operates on too small of a scale. We need to finish the recipe off with someone who really knows how to dominate an entire society.

Top it all off with Immortan Joe.

Let that simmer for an election campaign or two, and you’ll be all set!

But seriously, whether you view Trump as simply inept or as machiavellian, it all boils down to the same thing: he’s exploding this country, and he’s doing so as quickly and effectively as possible. If the end result is the same, how much does it matter if we got there through ineptitude or willful destruction?

I don’t know what to do with Trump. I don’t know how to maintain a steady effort against what he’s doing to this country. I have no desire to turn this blog into a steady drumbeat of anti-Trump messages. And maybe that’s some of what he’s up to. If he just keeps a steady firehose stream of awful spewing out, then there’s only so much of it people will have the desire or means to stop. Plenty of it will get through.

And how depressing is that?

So for now, I’m speaking up online where and when I can, but I’ll try to reserve blog posts for when things just get too terrible for me to stay silent. Thankfully it appears many many people are speaking up for me. Judging by my Facebook and Twitter feeds, many many others are shouting their discontent, and that many voices inevitably are heard. I have to believe that.

It’s what’s gotten me through the past week.

For Every Wednesday, There’s a Thursday

Wednesday was a pretty rotten day, all things considered. Between the clogged sink and the water all over the floor from the dishwasher, I had plenty of reasons to be bummed. It had been a long day at work, and I was just totally burned out by the time I went to bed.

But then Thursday came, and things got better. The sink got fixed. Our order of pellets (which hadn’t come on Wednesday as scheduled) arrived. And getting them put away in the garage proved much easier than I’d feared. The projector had arrived, and I’d worried about whether or not I’d be able to install it where I wanted. Basically, every time a day like Wednesday comes around, you start to question whether anything will be simple and straightforward again. It just feels like you’re snake bit.

But the projector went up without a hitch. The mount I’d bought worked well. The positioning is great. The screen size is 110 inches, a bit smaller than the 120″ I’d hoped for, but once we had it up on the wall, we decided not to zoom it to the maximum dimensions. The room isn’t deep enough to make watching a movie at that size comfortable on the eyes. But as I was watching The Princess Bride to test things out, I was just so happy. The plan was working! Things were coming together!

I’ve now got the screen ordered, the speaker stands arrived today, and I’ll be getting wiring and cables today or tomorrow. I’m on track for a Groundhog Day screening of epic proportions.

So anyway. It was just such a contrast in days. One day everything seemed to go wrong. The next day, everything seemed to go right. As I thought about it, I saw a lot of parallels in the feeling I have when I’m writing. Some days it feels like everything I’m writing is garbage. Some days it all feels perfect. But when I read it all over after the fact, months or years later? It all looks the same.

It doesn’t take much to give flavor to a day. Have a few things blow up in your face, and you feel like a total failure. Have a few things go just right, and you’re on top of the world. But most days are full of things just going normal. You remember the outliers and use them to evaluate how everything else went. It helps to take a step back and remind yourself of that.

And on that note, have a lovely weekend. I’m going to be running speaker wire!

All Plugged Up

Some days don’t go like you plan. Some days, you think you’re going to zig, but then you just don’t zag. You end up getting a clogged main drain in your kitchen that causes two sinks and a dishwasher to overflow.

Or is that just me?

Honestly, I think things like this stick out mainly because we take them for granted for so long. You turn on the kitchen sink, and it just works. The water goes down the drain, and everybody’s happy. So when you turn on the sink and the water doesn’t go down the drain, but instead drains into the dishwasher (except you don’t realize that just yet), then things are alarming. And so when you try for a couple of hours to use different ways to fix that drain, and keep filling it up again to see what’s going on (each time sending more water to your dishwasher), you get even more aggravated.

And when you hear a dripping sound coming from your dishwasher? And you open it up and have a gallon or two of water flood out over your kitchen floor?

That’s not a good feeling, either.

Of course, I turned to research to try and solve the problem, but my plumbing didn’t line up with the plumbing I was researching, no matter how many links I clicked or pages I turned. So I called my genius handyman, who showed up and confirmed that my plumbing was . . . unique. After we tried for another half hour or so to clear the drain, the solution was clear:

Just rip out the plumbing and start over.

So that’s what’s happening at home today while I’m at work. I’m crossing my fingers that it’s going well. They already found an kitchen knife lodged in the pipe. Apparently those things can fit down the drain. Who knew? In the meantime, I guess I’m just happy to be here at work, far away from drains and plungers for a while.

How was your yesterday?

When Childhood Movies Don’t Disappoint: The Parent Trap

I noticed the original Hayley Mills Parent Trap was put on Netflix a few weeks ago. This was a movie I’d watched a number of times as a kid, and I always really remembered it fondly. Which, these days, is usually a good sign that I should avoid watching it again. I’ve been burned by my earlier bad taste too many times. But the thing with childhood favorites is I always feel compelled to pass them on to my children. If I liked the movie back then, won’t they like it now?

So we watched it together as a family the other night. And for once, I discovered that the movie held up remarkably well. I still really enjoyed it from start to finish.

For those of you who don’t know, the movie’s about twins whose parents divorced when they were babies. Mom went to Boston, Dad went to California, and they each took a child with them. Because who cares about what the kids think, right?

Fast forward a decade or so, and through a strange coincidence, the twins end up at the exact same summer camp. They can’t stand each other at first, but they become friends and deduce they’re actually siblings. Since they’re identical, and each wants to meet the parent they don’t know, they swap places and parents when they leave camp. The ultimate goal, of course, is to reunite their parents and convince them that they still love each other. But there’s a twist: Dad’s met a new woman, and he’s planning on getting married soon, so the twins are going to have to accelerate their plans a fair bit.

Comedy ensues.

It’s really a pleasure from start to finish. Sure, there’s a bit of clunky acting now and then. A lot of that has to do with the fact that Hayley Mills was acting with herself, so responses are tough. But the special effects still stand up, and the story’s a lot of fun too (as long as you don’t think too hard about it). The family enjoyed it, and I can happily recommend the movie to anyone else looking for a fun evening with their kids.

Well done, Disney.

Fun with Polyurethane

We finished the new space above our garage back in October. Well, almost. The last step we needed to do was put up two coats of polyurethane on the walls, ceilings, and floor. But it was the end of the project, and we were busy, and we were tired, and and and . . .

We decided to wait to finish it in the spring. It’s not like it really mattered, right? It wasn’t going anywhere. But knowing that it was there, still waiting to be finished, just sort of hung around in the back of my head, tapping me on the shoulder now and then to remind me that it was a Project To Be Done.

Over Christmas, I had lofty aspirations of finishing it. I had time off work, so why not? Except I played video games, watched movies, and read books instead. (Totally worth it.) We could do it later.

But then I started making purchases for the home theater, and I started wishing I could use the space sooner than later, and I started figuring out what would go where. And then I started trying to figure out how we were going to put up polyurethane coats when the room was furnished.

At that point, waiting didn’t make sense anymore.

Sigh.

So last night Denisa and I started the project. And of course it went much more quickly than we’d feared. Isn’t that always how it is? So much of getting a project done rests on getting the project started. There’s a huge amount of inertia you face when you know you have the whole thing to do. It’s easy to come up with excuses to avoid it. But once you’re actually doing it, it often takes less time than making up all those excuses took in the first place. I see this with my kids all the time. Too bad I still struggle with recognizing it in my own life.

Anyway. Today, we were gifted with a snow day. No work for either of us. So it looks like today’s the day to finish the project. I’ll take it! Because Wednesday, my projector arrives . . .

Movie Review: I Am Not a Serial Killer

It’s not every day I get to review a movie based on one of my friend’s books. That’s pretty exciting right there. Dan Wells’ I Am Not a Serial Killer is a really cool book, first and foremost. I read it back in the day and loved it then, and I remember him talking it up on our way to WorldCon in LA, back when I first met him. A kid who’s obsessed with serial killers and knows he has all the markings of becoming one himself, and wants to somehow avoid that? Awesome concept for a character, and really well executed in the book. Add to that a plot about an actual serial killer picking off people in a small town, and you have a recipe for success.

So the book is great. But how is the adaptation?

Uneven. (Sorry, Dan. Please don’t unleash your minions on me. I just call ‘em like I see ‘em.)

It’s tough, because there’s a lot I really like about the movie. First and foremost is the acting. Christopher Lloyd (Doc from Back to the Future) does a great job of playing the lead’s elderly next door neighbor, and the lead himself (Max Records, from Where the Wild Things Are) is my favorite part of the film. He really portrays John Cleaver so well, showing a boy on the brink between light and darkness. There’s a scene where John confronts his mom that’s really terrifying in a very real sense, and the success of it is squarely on Records. The acting is super.

The feel of the movie is also great. It felt like a nice throwback movie from the late 70s/early 80s. Trimmed down and bare bones, but in a good way. It didn’t shove it in your face ala Stranger Things, but it pervaded the whole production.

The conflicts and plot from the book carry over well, so that helps a lot too. The set up is the same, so all is ready for a great movie.

It’s the adaptation where things fall apart. Specifically, transitioning all elements of the plot successfully.

In the book, John has a love interest that presents problems for him. He’s attracted to a girl, but he’s trying not to stalk her, despite not really knowing how to approach her otherwise. That’s done well in the movie, but it feels tacked on. Ultimately, the plot development goes nowhere. It’s vestigial, with not enough given to it to have it make sense to people who aren’t familiar with the book.

A second, bigger example of this is the climax of the movie. Trying to keep this as spoiler free as possible, the way the villain is fought comes from out of the blue. There’s no discussion of the villain’s weaknesses or experimentation to find them. Dan didn’t do that in the book. He set things up wonderfully, so you know exactly what can and can’t be done to win.

Honestly, it felt to me like something had been filmed (in both cases: the villain and the love interest) and had been left on the editing floor. Maybe I’m wrong. For three quarters of the movie, everything’s awesome. It starts slowly, but builds really nicely. And then the resolution just feels rushed and haphazard. Disappointing.

Check the movie out if you’re interested in creepy independent horror, or if you want to see some cool acting performances. I gave it a 6/10, though this is with my new “Bryce is rating movies more harshly” mantra.

Anyone else out there already seen it? What did you think?

Inauguration: Then and Now

Eight years ago, I made a special effort to watch the inauguration during work. Why? Because I thought it would be historic. Because I had really bought into the theme of hope Obama embodied, and I wanted to be there at the start of it. And it was an inspiring service, and I left emboldened, even as many in the nation viewed Obama as ominous. They believed he would lead the country somewhere they didn’t want to go.

And now that he’s done with his presidency, many in the country believe he did just that. There are two narratives. One says Obama has been a picture of grace and leadership. That he’s done a great job leading this country through troubled times. The other says he stomped all over the Constitution and that he’s leaving the country a wreck that needs to be repaired.

But here we are at another inauguration, one I have no real desire to witness, and which I won’t make time for at work. And basically, the tables have flipped. You have the same two views on the man who was elected. Which one is right? I would love to be proved wrong. It would be one of the biggest reliefs ever. Time will tell, but I imagine at the end of Trump’s presidency (four or eight years from now), there will still be the two narratives. Still be the two sides that believe two opposite things. That’s the power of a good story, told over time by many different people.

It is what it is.

My real hope is that government will continue to be as inept at getting things accomplished as they have always been. I’ve been in Maine, where we’ve had Trump-lite as a governor for the past long while. He’s said idiotic things. He’s made us look bad. He’s made awful proposals. He’s even tried to appoint himself to lead Education Commissioner. Trump hasn’t tried to make himself head of any of his Cabinet positions. Yet. But even with all the bungling and inanity, life in Maine has moved on. I’ve had good days and bad.

I believe the same will hold true having Trump as a president.

Anyway. Right before Trump takes the oath of office, The Mormon Tabernacle Choir will sing America the Beautiful. And while I guess it’s great that the choir is getting this kind of exposure, you have to admit it looks pretty bad. To have a church that still struggles with a perception that it’s racist, sexist, and homophobic send one of its best known groups to sing right before the election of a man like Trump and all the baggage he brings? It’s going to be validation of that view of the church for many. “See? There go the Mormons again, praising hate.”

I was a missionary for two years. I know the sort of things said about the church, and I know how hard it can be to convince people otherwise. But water, bridge. It’s unfortunate, though I still maintain the church pretty much got painted into that corner this time. (No desire to debate it with any of you again, however.)

Life goes on. Wish us luck.