Mary DeTurris Poust's Blog, page 12

We are one. The trouble starts when we forget that.

News of Russia’s attack on the people of Ukraine hit like a nauseating wave as news headlines scrolled by on TV the morning of the invasion. I could feel a deep sadness tinged with anxiety rising as I watched images of people huddling in Ukrainian subway stations that had become bomb shelters. Why is it that powerful people are never content with the enormous power they already have but must continue to amass more, even at the expense of lives ended, futures destroyed?

As my teenage daughter and I watched the news, I pointed out that the people fearing for their lives and clinging to each other underground could be people from Anywhere, USA. People with families and homes, hopes and dreams. People just like us. It’s only when we forget that truth that we get into trouble.

Years ago, in a reflection about working toward peace, Mother Teresa wrote: “Today, if we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other—that man, that woman, that child is my brother or my sister. If everyone could see the image of God in his neighbor, do you think we would still need tanks and generals?”

While we can hear this beloved saint’s words and nod our heads in agreement, wondering how political leaders cannot see the common humanity that binds us together, the truth is that we often don’t recognize that same truth in our own lives. It’s easy to love strangers on the other side of the globe, people whom we will never meet. What’s harder is to do the same with the people closer to us — the co-worker who annoys us, the relative who pushes our buttons, the neighbor who holds a different political opinion.

Which brings us to another beautiful-but-tough-to-live teaching by another saintly Catholic woman, Dorothy Day, who said: “I really only love God as much as I love the person I love the least.”

Who are the people we “love the least,” maybe not in obvious and hateful ways but in ways that slowly eat away at our compassionate nature, that harden our edges and eventually our hearts? It may be difficult even to admit to ourselves that there are people we actively refuse to love or even like, but we’d all be living saints if that were not the case.

The problem is that when we allow the smoldering embers of anger and hatred to take root in our hearts, they give oxygen to larger fires of anger and hatred. Taken to the extreme, that raging fire can lead one man, one nation to rise up against another and kill innocent people for personal and political gain.

In truth, what we’re seeing play out on the international stage is not much different from what happened 2,000 years ago. As we journey through Lent, we see fear and hatred fuel the throngs who go from following Jesus of Nazareth devotedly to demanding his crucifixion. An innocent man who challenged the status quo is turned into the enemy, not because he is a danger to the people but because he is a threat to power. By portraying Jesus as “other,” the power brokers were able to turn the people from love to loathing and in short order have them calling for Jesus to be hung on a cross.

 Dorothy Day also said: “The greatest challenge of the day is: how to bring about a revolution of the heart, a revolution which has to start with each one of us?” We may not be able to stop a war on the other side of the globe, but we can stop the war in our own hearts? We are no different from the people hunkering down in bomb shelters in Ukraine. There is no “other.” We are one.

This column originally appeared in the March 3, 2022, issue of The Evangelist, and the March 10, 2022, issue of Catholic New York. 

Photo by Noorulabdeen Ahmad on Unsplash

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Change and Challenge: New podcast is up. Finally!

The podcast returns — finally! — with Episode 5 exploring change and the challenges that come with it, even when we want that change. Transformation is never easy, but it is SO worth it. Give it a listen. (14 minutes)

For more Life Lines episodes, click HERE.

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Lost Generations? No one to blame but ourselves

Back when my husband, Dennis, and I were teaching a two-year confirmation prep program at our parish in upstate New York, I wrote a column saying that when I looked out at my students, I saw what I believed to be 75 percent “future ex-Catholics.” Most did not know much about the faith in which they were raised, and what they did know just made them confused or angry.

Now a recent Pew Study has provided startling new numbers on the continuing decline of religious identity among Christians of all ages, but especially young adults. I take little satisfaction in being right about my prediction all those years ago. There is no comfort in knowing that our Church — and other religious denominations as well — are losing members in record numbers, but to be honest, we have no one to blame but ourselves.

Oh, we tend to blame quickly and often. We blame the culture. We blame social media. We blame anything that will shine a spotlight away from us. But the truth is that we are hemorrhaging Catholics because we have not been able or willing to give the last two generations of lost Catholics a relevant and tangible connection between the complicated lives they are living and the beliefs we expect them to profess. “Meet people where they are” is the common refrain, but those words require us to put our money where our mouth is, and “where they are” is often in places that are in tension with Catholic teaching. So how do we meet people in a place that cannot be located on a Catholic GPS?

I think that’s where the Synod — as confusing as that feels to many of us — can help us make a connection, if we are willing to push outside our familiar boundaries. I hesitate to use the term “to the margins” because, at the rate we are going, the Catholics who remain in the pews each week are becoming more marginal than those who are choosing to skip Mass, skip prayer, skip faith. And yet, we know — not just from studies but from personal experience — that people are hungrier than ever for connection, for community, for meaning. They’re just not hungry for a connection with us. Why is that?

Some will say it’s because in our secularized society people do not want to follow teachings that don’t suit their individual choices, and to be sure, there’s a lot of truth to that. But it’s more than rampant individualism, and it’s more than agenda or politics or lack of catechesis. The things that people deal with in their lives that often pull them away from the Church — divorce, contraception, LGBTQ+ issues, women’s roles, the abuse crisis — are not simply talking points. They are the stuff of people’s daily lives, the stuff that weighs on their hearts and keeps them up at night. They are the very things for which people need and want spiritual connection and guidance, and yet they are also the very things that cut them off from the sacraments and, by extension, from their spiritual home.

We cannot get people to a place where the significance of the Eucharist is enough to keep them coming to Mass if we cannot first help them feel like they belong. Jesus didn’t start with Eucharist. He started with mercy. He started in the margins. He started with storytelling and dinner parties with all the “wrong” people, the people whom his society said did not belong. But as it turns out, everybody belongs.

If we start with belonging, if we start with welcoming rather than judgment, we might just find people coming back to church feeling grateful rather than resentful, joyful rather than judged. But making that happen is not on the folks who have left; it’s on those who remain. It’s time to recalculate our Catholic GPS and find what — and who — we’ve been missing.

This column originally appeared in the February 10, 2022, issue of Catholic New York.

Photo by Jametlene Reskp on Unsplash

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Registration is open for Stillpoint Retreat Sept. 9-11

Registration is now open for the annual Stillpoint Retreat at Pyramid Life Center to be held Friday, Sept. 9, through Sunday, Sept. 11, 2022. Spots are filling up fast, so don’t wait to hold your space for this retreat that will allow you find the calm amid life’s chaos, spend time in silence, build community, eat great food with great people, laugh (a lot), kayak, practice yoga, hike, pray, and just be.

The retreat is $175, all-inclusive. What does that mean? You’ll get rustic accommodations at the always-beautiful Pyramid Life Center with its mountains and lake, island and waterfall. It’s a beautiful gem in the lower Adirondack Mountains, the kind of place you never want to leave and you always want to come back to. In addition, that price includes homemade meals, kayaking or canoeing, swimming (if it’s warm), and all retreat activities — from daily talks and reflections and optional daily yoga sessions to journaling and collage-as-prayer, plus a Saturday night bonfire, weather permitting. Plenty of free time is built into the schedule for doing your own thing, in solitude or with a retreat friend.

Morning coffee with a view

Here are a few comments from some folks who joined me for the Stillpoint retreat at Pyramid in years past:

“Who would think that spiritual renewal could be so much fun? You get the best of everything at the Stillpoint retreat! Meditation, prayer, inspiring talks which lead to sharing, time to hike, kayak, attend Mass, yoga. Lifetime friendships are made all in the backdrop of splendorous Pyramid Lake! Cannot wait for next year!”  — Karen

“Mary has chosen an ideal destination of beauty and seclusion at Pyramid Life Center in the Adirondacks, for a weekend of respite from everyday bustle and strain. She gently introduces multiple avenues toward peaceful renewal including her own insights, well-chosen readings emphasizing self-nurturing and acceptance, acknowledging gratitude with everyday life occurrences, yoga, sharing, and silent mindful reflection. There is freedom to explore or relax in the natural splendor of the lake, the hills and surrounding wooded trails, with loon song, brilliant stars and the scent and cradle of the woods.” — Margie

“This weekend was a gift! Thank you to Mary, the other retreatants, Brian and his staff for a wonderful experience!” — Ann

“This weekend’s Stillpoint retreat left me reflective, spirit filled and in a better place than I was a few days ago! Thanks to Mary, all participants and PLC staff!” — Cherie

“Mary- it truly was an amazing experience this past weekend and you planted so many seeds with your knowledge and passion. I’m already doing my homework and looking up this and that and continuing my stillness in my routine. I am grateful and wish many blessings for all.” — Kristen

“Thank you, Mary, for another phenomenal retreat! I will hold it in my heart through the year.” — Eileen

Registration link is HERE. Scroll down until you see the Stillpoint listing. See you at Pyramid!

There’s a chair with your name on it. What are you waiting for?

 

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Celebrating 14 years here on Not Strictly Spiritual and gearing up for new adventures to come

Today marks the 14th anniversary of this blog. I launched it back in 2008 on the Feast of St. Francis de Sales, patron saint of writers, not really knowing what would happen. Back then, I was able to be here daily, sometimes multiple times per day, a luxury I have not had for the past few years, but that’s about to change! I missed you all so much that I’ve quit my job so I can hang around here more often. Okay, maybe that wasn’t the only reason, but it really was part of it! This week, I will end my almost seven-year stint as Director of Communications for the Diocese of Albany so that I can return to what I love to do most: write, lead retreats, teach yoga, and finally get back to my long-abandoned podcast. (You can find the first four episodes of that HERE.)

I want to thank all of you who continue to visit this site. Thank you for being patient, for staying with me, and for lifting me up with your comments and emails when I do get around to posting something here. I have been so touched by your willingness to share your own faith stories and to talk openly about your struggles, accomplishments and moments of crisis. Our community of blog regulars might be small, but you are a mighty and devoted band of followers. You constantly remind me that being willing and able to share the secrets of my soul is not only a great opportunity for spiritual growth but for personal transformation.

In a world where we are often far from family and cut off from daily interactions with friends — especially during life in the time of pandemic — this virtual community has served as touchstone for me, and I hope for you as well. Every once in a while when I start to wonder if I am just spewing my spiritual insecurities to no one in particular, a virtual version of talking to myself, I inevitably receive a comment or email telling me how something on the blog struck a chord or gave someone a feeling of peace. I can assure you that when I started this blog all those years ago, I never imagined that I would be granted such access to other people’s spiritual thoughts and lives. I am humbled and grateful.

Stay tuned for whatever is to come on this site in the weeks and months ahead. I’ve got lots of ideas percolating right now. I can tell you that, as we “speak,” a web designer is creating a new Not Strictly Spiritual logo and is gearing up to overhaul the entire website to make it easier to navigate (and a whole lot prettier!).

Thank you again for sticking with me. You are a blessing in my life.
Peace, love and blessings,
Mary

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Fear Factor

It seems so straightforward: Jesus appoints his Apostles. There doesn’t seem to be much to delve into here. We know how this Gospel (Mark 3:13-19) turns out. But, if we are willing to go where our hearts are sometimes afraid to look, we cannot help but pause at the first line: “Jesus went up the mountain and summoned those whom he wanted and they came to him.”

Do we imagine it was so cut and dried for the men who went up that mountain? They were fishermen; they were married; they were carrying out the jobs to which they thought they would dedicate their lives. But Jesus calls them to something more, something radical, and they go, without question. Or so it seems. What conversations did the Apostles have—with their families, with themselves? It couldn’t have been easy.

Our call is not nearly so difficult, although at times it can feel that way. Sometimes even the smallest stretch beyond our normal reach makes us anxious and afraid. But Jesus is not asking us to give up our jobs or our families (at least not in most cases); he’s simply asking us to give more, and therein lies the fear factor. We don’t have to give up everything we know. We “just” have to put down our internal baggage and pick up the yoke of Jesus. It’s not as easy as it sounds, but we know from the Twelve that it is the only way that will set us free.

Mary DeTurris Poust, “Fear Factor,” from the January 2022 issue of Give Us This Day, www.giveusthisday.org (Collegeville, MN: Liturgical Press, 2021). Used with permission.

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Knowing — and doing — what we’re born to do

Hanging on my office door is an image of Joan of Arc in all her courageous glory, with a version of her famous quote: “I am not afraid. I was born to do this.” It has been my mantra for more than six years, as I have navigated the often-challenging waters of Catholic communications. It’s not easy being Catho­lic these days, whether we’re sitting in a pew, serving in a parish, or working in a diocesan center. But Joan’s words remind us that we are called to fearlessly follow the still small voice wherever it leads, no matter how intimidating or seemingly impossible.

Her bold statement is not some sort of lightweight greeting-card affirmation. It was spoken by a woman who was filled with zeal for her mission, despite the naysayers, despite the people who thought she was headstrong or crazy, despite the church leaders who eventually had her tied to a stake and set ablaze. All these years later, Joan remains an inspiration, especially to women who are all too used to being doubted, denigrated and dismissed.

What made people feel threatened by Joan then is the very same thing that makes people feel threatened today: new ideas. She challenged the status quo, and that makes people very uncomfortable. Change is never easy. And while change is hard on the person making the actual choice for a different path, it turns out that it can be even harder for those on the outside, where unlikely or seemingly outrageous choices can make people feel confused, fearful and agitated. As someone who has made the unlikely or outrageous choice multiple times in my life, I understand how hard it is to go against the grain.

We’re only a week into the new year and many people will have already failed to live up to the resolutions they set. Why? Because creating new habits and taking new paths is difficult, especially if we don’t anchor that change in something with greater meaning than the number on a Fitbit or bathroom scale. If we want real transformation, something that will change us from the inside out, we have to do the hard work of self-examination, time spent in silence listening for the movement of the Spirit in our lives. When we do that — not just once but regularly — we suddenly find that, like Joan, we are not afraid to do what we were born for.

Last month, the still small voice began to get louder and louder for me, like a drumbeat that could not be ignored. No matter how much I tried to busy myself with projects and trainings, Netflix shows and good food, it was there. Constant. Insistent. Silent but booming. And I knew it was time for me to take that leap of faith into the next place God is calling me to go. It would have been easier in many ways to stay with what was known and comfortable, but most times the Spirit doesn’t offer comfort; the Spirit usually asks us to go to the places that scare us.

So that is what I am doing — with joy and excitement, and, yes, a healthy dose of nervousness. I am leaving the security of my job at the diocesan pastoral center to return to my home-based writing and retreat business, because writing is at the heart of who I am, and it is time to get back to it in a more intentional way. Writing is like breathing to me. I cannot imagine my life without words pouring out onto paper on a near-constant basis. It’s what I have done professionally for 37 years running. Even when I was working a full-time day job, I was writing “on the side” whenever possible. It’s time to flip that dynamic and follow my calling. It is what I was born to do, of that I have never had a doubt, and I am not afraid.

This column originally appeared in the Jan. 6, 2022, issue of The Evangelist.

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Begin. Begin again. Begin every day.

Hello, my lovelies! Were you wondering if I had forgotten about you and our plan to start a reVolution not a resolution? There is a method to my madness. As I said from the get-go, this is not a resolution that you make and, once you break, you give up until the next year. No, no. This is a daily decision. And I wanted to wait until we were a few days into this new year — past all the potential, “This feels like a resolution,” questions. Plus, I like the idea of a Monday post to jumpstart our week as we go. So expect Mondays to be the day you’ll see some new Tribe-ReVolution posts going up.

So here we are in Week 1 of our daily efforts to journey inward and discover our true selves and create transformation along the way. If you missed the first post on this, you can find it HERE. It will tell you what to pack for this journey (hint: If you have a spiral notebook, you’re pretty much good to go. The rest can be collected along the way.) The one “requirement,” and I use that term loosely, is a gratitude journal, because, trust me, it is such an easy way to begin to shift our attitude, and it’s really nice to be able to go back and look at all the blessings in our lives rather than journals filled with angst and woe. So today I thought I would start with that basic daily activity: gratitude journaling.

What does it look like? Whatever you want it to look like. Seriously. You can buy yourself the most beautiful leather journal with homemade paper; you can use a 10-cent spiral notebook picked up at last year’s back-to-school sale; you can even use a great big mason jar or some other container and squares of brightly colored paper. So many options!

Okay, now that we’ve got the actual journal, what do we do? Well, there are lots of ways you can choose to do this, but I’ll tell you my way, which is quick and so easy I (almost) never say, “Nah, I don’t have time.” Every night before I climb into bed, I take the spiral journal from my nightstand and date the entry. Then I write down three things from that day that I count among my blessings. (I number them consecutively so I can see them adding up over the months. It’s a banner day when I hit a milestone, like 3,000, which I did last month!) Sometimes the entries are so simple (the smell of coffee brewing in the morning) and other times sublime (someone getting a good diagnosis). Most days it’s somewhere in between. Once you start this practice, you’ll find yourself noticing things as you go about your day and thinking, “Oh, I can’t forget to write that down tonight.” Of course, you can always jot down those blessings as you go — on your phone, in a planner, whatever is handy. When I do notice something like that and I’m not near my journal, I often speak the blessing or happy moment out loud to memorialize it in some way. It makes it more real (and less likely I’ll forget it when I get to bedtime).

Here’s a sample from a recent entry:

A big white moon in a bright blue morning skyA flock of birds flying in unison over and over right above my car in the Pastoral Center parking lotEveryone home for dinner

And here is a day’s entry pulled from the archives from 2006 (told you I’ve been doing this sort of thing for a while):

For the dark, stark winter landscape of my backyard against the white night snowWatching “Magic School Bus” with Noah this afternoonFor my home

So, today, this week, try to seek out the beauty and blessings around you, the miracles in your midst. Did something make you smile? Did something touch your heart? Did you just look out into your yard or across a room and spy something that made you happy or made you feel grateful. Write it down. The best part of this is that you don’t have to be a writer or a poet or a meditator or any of those potentially scary things. You just need a pen, a piece of paper and the willingness to notice the world around you in a more intentional way.

Try to go through your days with attention and INtention. This is the first step to reVolution, evolution, transformation and joy. Join me. And, if you’d like, share your experiences with this practice in the comment section. If you miss a day or two or ten, just pick it up and begin again. Always be willing to begin again. You don’t have to wait for a magical date on the calendar. Every day is an opportunity to start over. And isn’t that something to write down in a gratitude journal!

If you keep at this practice, it will slowly change how you see the world around you, and it really will make you more grateful for everything in your life, less likely to complain about the little annoyances, and more compassionate to the people around you. It doesn’t happen all at once, but little by little, day by day, year by year. Just begin and see what happens. If you write down three things every day, you will surpass 1,000 blessings in a year.

I’ve been writing about gratitude journaling for years (decades?), so if you’d like to read some of my previous stories and posts on this, you can start HERE.

You can also find me talking about this topic over on my podcast, Life Lines with Mary DeTurris Poust. Click HERE for that.

Thank you for joining me on this journey. Remember to begin again each day. There is no start date, no end date, no “goal” you have to hit. Just begin. And then begin again.

Peace and Love,
Mary

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Why settle for a single resolution when you can choose a life-changing reVolution?

For those who frequent this blog, you know my annual end-of-year rallying cry has always been: ReVolution, not resolution! Why? Because resolutions don’t work. How do I know that? Look at any resolutions you have made and track whether you’ve made that same resolution more than once. When we make New Year’s resolutions, we often set ourselves up for “failure” and disappointment and a slippery slope that lands us right back where we started, or, sometimes, even farther behind. But, if we focus instead on a reVolution — of the heart and mind and soul — we are on the road to real transformation. So this year join me, and resolve to evolve.

We are not starting out this new year looking to drop pounds and dress sizes or simply start a new exercise routine. We are looking to go much deeper than that, to a place where we can dig into the fertile soil of our soul, a place where there are ideas and experiences and adventures trying to poke through the surface and blossom into the life we deserve, the life we’ve been dreaming of. Stop counting calories and counting steps and counting sheep and start breathing deep, sitting still, looking inward, reaching outward, living life with attention and INtention.

This journey will be about finding out who you really are and coming to terms with your true self and realizing (finally!) that you are good enough exactly as you are right now, at this very moment, whether or not you feel you need to eat healthier, exercise more, spend less time on social media, read more, pray more.

Whatever your “goal,” we want to begin from a place of acceptance, but that takes work. It doesn’t come naturally, does it? We are hard on ourselves, always seeing the cracks, the flaws, the places where we’ve failed to live up to our own expectations. That’s about to change…

What words will guide you this year?

Often the root of our feelings are buried way down deep inside. They’re not easy to face, and so we use other things (food, social media, alcohol, gossip, shopping, etc.) to fill the void, and, before you know it, we’ve layered another “issue” on top of whatever else we’ve go going on. We get caught in a vicious cycle, always setting ourself up for failure by making goals or resolutions that are doomed because the real work doesn’t involve a scale or heart rate monitor. It involves getting right with God and with ourselves. Exciting and daunting, but not nearly so much when we do it together!

In years past, the Cravings Tribe (you can sign up HERE)  focused on moving through my book by that name, a book that looks at food specifically and how we use it to stuff the empty places in ourselves. But last year I switched things up and took a different approach. We’ll do the same this year. Our approach will be to go below the surface, not focusing on body image or calorie counting but instead on the person we face when we quiet all the noise and go inward. During this time of ongoing, seemingly never-ending pandemic, when we are still limiting travel, why not take the deepest and most exciting trip of all — the one that leads to your true heart center, the person you have always meant to be, the person you have always been but have hidden beneath what the world expects, demands of you.

Come along with me. Here are a few things I recommend as we start out on this journey of inner transformation (which often results in an outer transformation without us even realizing it!):

A journal or notebook. It doesn’t have to be fancy; you can pick up a cheap spiral notebook. I’ll give more specific prompts as we move along, but know that there is one thing I consider a requirement: Every day write down three things for which you are grateful. If you’d like, you can get a notebook just for this and keep a separate journal for writing. That’s what I do. More on gratitude journaling to come.A sacred space in your home. You don’t need a room devoted to meditation and journaling; all you need is a corner, a chair, a shelf. Find some little space where you can go each day to read, reflect, journal, sit in silence, and add a few things that bring a sense of the divine to the mix. It could be a cross or statue of a saint, or it could be things like seashells and feathers, pine cones and rocks. My sacred space happens to have a combination of both.A willingness to sit in silence for at least 5 minutes a day, preferably 10, because, really, what major goal have you ever accomplished in only 5 minutes. Go to your sacred space and turn off your phone, the TV or anything else that might distract you. If you’d like, set a timer so you’re not continually checking a clock to see how much longer you have to go. We’ll talk more about this practice in the weeks ahead.A spot where you can either see or be in nature. Do you have a chair by a window where you can see birds or squirrels? Do you have a path nearby or a quiet street where you can take short walks (or long walks if that’s your thing)? Nature has a way to heal us, connect us, make us kinder. More to come on that too…If you’re an artsy or visual person, consider saving up some old magazines, cards, or other images that speak to you for a spiritual collage down the road. Another favorite activity of mine. In fact, I have an entire journal dedicated to my spiritual collages. I love looking back and seeing the words and images that spoke to me at different times. I’ll do a whole post on this as we move through the weeks ahead.Join the Cravings Tribe!

So, essentially, all you need for this revolution is a spiral notebook. The rest you can cull from whatever you’ve got around you. Not bad. No meal plans to order, no expensive monthly subscriptions to sustain. In some ways, it’s easier to do those things. Those things convince us if only we can eat a certain number of calories or walk a certain number of steps, life will be better, happier. The harder work is to go at this without the crutch of diet plans and expensive workout clothes. It’s exciting, and I hope you’ll join me here on the blog. I won’t be posting every day. I hope to post at least once a week with some prompts and encouragement, links and suggestions. I also hope to supplement this with some podcasts.

For those who would like a little more, I’m offering a three-week meditation and mindfulness series called “Resolve to Evolve” at Jai Yoga School, also available virtually (live). Here are the details: 

Resolve to Evolve — Sundays, Jan. 2, 9, 16, 12:30 to 1:30 p.m.
Cost: $60 for the three-week series. Registration: HERE.

Just remember that you are loved and beautiful and good enough just as you are. Join me on a journey to discover the you you’ve forgotten.

Love, peace and blessings Mary

 

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Resigned, not retired: don’t dismiss me that easily

Ever since the Times Union ran a story (and my office issued a press release) announcing my resignation as Director of Communications for the Diocese of Albany, I have been on the receiving end of lots of congratulatory comments that miss the mark. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the congratulations — because those are definitely warranted — but I feel like I need to set the record straight on the specific terms and definitions that surround this momentous decision.

I am NOT retiring. First of all, I’m too young to retire (59).  Second, I don’t really plan to retire EVER. I hope to write and lead retreats and teach yoga and do my thing until I just can’t go anymore. I don’t plan to stop until someone or something stops me. I have RESIGNED my position. I am leaving. Plain and simple. It was time. I am lucky enough to be able to make the choice to return to the work I love more than anything else. I realize that not everyone gets that choice or that chance, and I am grateful and thrilled to be able to walk away. I have to thank my family, specifically my husband, Dennis, for their complete and enthusiastic encouragement of a decision that seems somewhat crazy to those who a.) don’t know me that well or b.)  don’t know anything about the kind of work I’ve had to do for the past six+ years.

Over the course of the past two weeks, I’ve had someone ask me if I’m “moving south” in retirement (Imagine my family’s surprise if that was my plan!); if I’m going to focus on my hobbies (My 37-year career has never been a hobby.); if I’m going to spend more time with my family (Seriously? I need to spend LESS time with these people.); if I’m going to give Dennis a standing ovation every day when he leaves for work while I stay home and (apparently) do nothing (Nope. Although I have offered to walk the dog in the mornings, which I never have to do, thanks to Dennis.).

Day in and day out for 37 years I have been a writer, whether I was a reporter, an editor, a freelance writer, a full-time stay-at-home mom and freelance writer at the same time, a communications director, or, as has been the case for the past six+ years, a full-time communications director and a half-time freelance writer/retreat leader who also teaches yoga twice a week. So, essentially, for the past six+ years, I have done two (sometimes three) jobs, which might explain why I’m usually pushed to the breaking point and why Dennis does 95 percent of the cooking, cleaning and shopping for our family. Something had to give. And, when it came down to it, I had to choose what feeds me, not what drains me. And what feeds me is my work as a writer, retreat leader, and yoga teacher.

So… I welcome your congratulatory messages, just please congratulate me on my RESIGNATION. I wear that choice as a badge of honor. It wasn’t an easy choice. In fact, it was a downright courageous choice, for me and for my family, because it requires financial sacrifice, and because it will require a lot of energy and hard work and chutzpah, all of which I have in excess but at 59 it’s a little more daunting than it was at 30.

I cannot wait to get back to more writing, more blogging, more podcasting (which has been on hold for months at this point), more retreats, more yoga classes, more of everything that makes my heart sing. Even this website is about to undergo a transformation as a designer begins work on a new logo and overall theme. So stay tuned for that!

If you haven’t signed up for my “tribe,” which basically includes an occasional (the plan is monthly) newsletter with info on retreats, events, books and more, you can do that HERE. I promise not to drive you crazy with emails, because nobody needs more emails.

Thanks for letting me clarify all of this, because, to be honest, I thought and prayed too hard on this decision to have it reduced to early retirement when it is, in fact, a professional reset and a resumption of the career I had before I ever went to the Diocese of Albany. I’m back, baby, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

 

Photo by Ross Findon on Unsplash

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