Josh Stern's Blog, page 181

November 8, 2012

Living with nymphomania

Don’t you hate when you waste this incredibly unbelievable, fantastic good luck on staying alive, instead of on a lottery ticket….???


Having a hernia is like getting ripped a new asshole, just in the front of your pants….I got a lift to this hospital by my Bro. It was on  the south shore of montreal, which I mistakenly thought was the west island of montreal…. because the breadth of my encyclopedic knowledge of the suburbs of montreal could fill a fecal occult sample (the kind that you mail in, after swiping your dump with a huge popsicle stick, onto some paper and send it, postage paid, in a ziploc baggy)


Finally it seemed that I was going to get an long overdue and much cock teased, operation date to have this wrecking ball removed from my ballsac, AND the hernia mended with this trans-vaginal mesh stuff that could make me eligible for a class-action suit cash award…


Socialized medicine means never having to read anything by Kafka, you live it…this was the ‘Penal Colony’ as it applied to the ballsac, seriously it was an overcrowded menagerie of ‘don’t come near me, I don’t know why you breed with animals”


Quebec is an island unto itself in North America, and I for one think it should secede from the rest of it, for the simple reason that it has nothing to do with the rest of North America…it truly is a ‘Hillbilly Nation” and anyone who is English Speaking really has no business being there.  However speaking of preserving their heritage is about as meaningful as revering the corn mash of a backwoods moonshine still as great literature.  These people are not French.  The French are eloquent, cultured, amazingly refined people that by and large live in Europe and summer on the Mediterranean  …These are Hillbilly, rural, popeye mouth-speaking troglodytes with a vernacular that dislocates their jaws…It has nothing to do with French…So calling it an heritage is as laughably insane as is their corrupted politics


That’s where the hospital comes in.


I wait there for 2 hours…resigned to the fact that I have contracted ass leprosy simply by sitting in this massive hall where everyone waits and dies…we are the only English speaking people in a sea of hopelessness, the kind of 47% underclass that sucks from a governmental teat so large that roughly half the population are some sort of civil servant…Socialism and self-entitled programs of these people make taxation a national sport…


So I wait, my dutiful Brother sweating it out as we forego the hospital parking and leave the car on the street with a huge bullseye for one of those pissant smartcars to ticket his Jeep…on the way over it was making this awful sound like the wheels needed alignment…which is weird because he just put on his snow tires for winter…you get tiketed bigtime if they’re not on by early November…Fuck I hate this place…but I digress.

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Published on November 08, 2012 23:15

October 23, 2012

josh! we love ya! u just followed me on twitter n i am following back! but what a find!! just your profile line had me laughing! im gonna buy your book/s if my bank lets me and please tweet or blog the hell outta this if u like it! as a brit in the US I ca

I tweeted you guys…It was hilarious…and it also led me to discover Asian Anal assassins so it wasn’t a total wash with the crisco….actually it was…cheers

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Published on October 23, 2012 15:26

josh! we love ya! u just followed me on twitter n i am following back! but what a find!! just your profile line had me laughing! im gonna buy your book/s if my bank lets me and please tweet or blog the hell outta this if u like it! as a brit in the US I ca

I tweeted you guys…It was hilarious…and it also led me to discover Asian Anal assassins so it wasn’t a total wash with the crisco….actually it was…cheers

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Published on October 23, 2012 15:26

josh! we love ya! u just followed me on twitter n i am following back! but what a find!! just your profile line had me laughing! im gonna buy your book/s if my bank lets me and please tweet or blog the hell outta this if u like it! as a brit in the US I ca

I tweeted you guys…It was hilarious…and it also led me to discover Asian Anal assassins so it wasn’t a total wash with the crisco….actually it was…cheers

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Published on October 23, 2012 15:26

josh! we love ya! u just followed me on twitter n i am following back! but what a find!! just your profile line had me laughing! im gonna buy your book/s if my bank lets me and please tweet or blog the hell outta this if u like it! as a brit in the US I ca

I tweeted you guys…It was hilarious…and it also led me to discover Asian Anal assassins so it wasn’t a total wash with the crisco….actually it was…cheers

 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on October 23, 2012 15:26

josh! we love ya! u just followed me on twitter n i am following back! but what a find!! just your profile line had me laughing! im gonna buy your book/s if my bank lets me and please tweet or blog the hell outta this if u like it! as a brit in the US I ca

I tweeted you guys…It was hilarious…and it also led me to discover Asian Anal assassins so it wasn’t a total wash with the crisco….actually it was…cheers

 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on October 23, 2012 15:26

josh! we love ya! u just followed me on twitter n i am following back! but what a find!! just your profile line had me laughing! im gonna buy your book/s if my bank lets me and please tweet or blog the hell outta this if u like it! as a brit in the US I ca

I tweeted you guys…It was hilarious…and it also led me to discover Asian Anal assassins so it wasn’t a total wash with the crisco….actually it was…cheers

 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on October 23, 2012 15:26

josh! we love ya! u just followed me on twitter n i am following back! but what a find!! just your profile line had me laughing! im gonna buy your book/s if my bank lets me and please tweet or blog the hell outta this if u like it! as a brit in the US I ca

I tweeted you guys…It was hilarious…and it also led me to discover Asian Anal assassins so it wasn’t a total wash with the crisco….actually it was…cheers

 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on October 23, 2012 15:26

josh! we love ya! u just followed me on twitter n i am following back! but what a find!! just your profile line had me laughing! im gonna buy your book/s if my bank lets me and please tweet or blog the hell outta this if u like it! as a brit in the US I ca

I tweeted you guys…It was hilarious…and it also led me to discover Asian Anal assassins so it wasn’t a total wash with the crisco….actually it was…cheers

 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on October 23, 2012 15:26

josh! we love ya! u just followed me on twitter n i am following back! but what a find!! just your profile line had me laughing! im gonna buy your book/s if my bank lets me and please tweet or blog the hell outta this if u like it! as a brit in the US I ca

I tweeted you guys…It was hilarious…and it also led me to discover Asian Anal assassins so it wasn’t a total wash with the crisco….actually it was…cheers

 •  0 comments  •  flag
Share on Twitter
Published on October 23, 2012 15:26