Rachelle D. Alspaugh's Blog, page 76
June 21, 2013
From the top of the mountain at night
A special night to welcome Juan David to the Alspaugh family. The card we gave him? A postcard of Dallas at night. :) He got up from the table and walked around to hug and kiss both of us. Love that boy.
(We couldn't get very many pictures of the family because it was just too dark, and we didn't want to lug around the camera that takes good night pics.)
June 20, 2013
Integracion
Today we had our second meeting which was called Integracion (Integration). We passed with a favorable interview, signifying that we have successfully integrated as a family unit. First they interviewed Juan David, and then they interviewed Mike and I. Our answers to all of their questions all matched up very well, and she told Mike and I that Juan David really, really, really wanted to be a part of our family. She said our prayers for him over the years have worked because she couldn't get over how respectful and sensible he was. She said she really couldn't even tell that he's been living under protection for so many years. That's not just our prayers for him, though. I know many of you have prayed for him faithfully for the last five years, even after our first attempt to adopt him failed. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Since we're using our own attorney, a few things have fallen through the cracks with things that the agency usually takes care of, like assigning us a translator, a driver, etc. So they've let me translate for all of our meetings and everywhere we go. We are so much more comfortable this way, though, because it keeps the communication clear between us and our attorney. Makes me feel good to know he's fully confident with my Spanish. Love that man and all he has done. He's absolutely amazing. I highly recommend him to anyone. Anyway, he is sending us one more paper to be signed so that I can take Juan David out of the country without Mike, and then Mike is free to go home so he can return to work.
Our dear friend Zayde is meeting us tonight at Monserrate (the infamous mountain where my first book concluded). We plan to return to the top of the mountain, have a special dinner to welcome Juan David to the family, and take pictures as a a celebration of all the success that today signifies.
Our papers can now be presented to the courts, and next week we will start with Juan David's medical exams. The following week, we have permission to travel on a little vacation outside of Bogota with our friends (Zayde's family), who we traveled with last summer when we went to Apulo. I will post our new family pictures this evening or tomorrow morning.
Since we're using our own attorney, a few things have fallen through the cracks with things that the agency usually takes care of, like assigning us a translator, a driver, etc. So they've let me translate for all of our meetings and everywhere we go. We are so much more comfortable this way, though, because it keeps the communication clear between us and our attorney. Makes me feel good to know he's fully confident with my Spanish. Love that man and all he has done. He's absolutely amazing. I highly recommend him to anyone. Anyway, he is sending us one more paper to be signed so that I can take Juan David out of the country without Mike, and then Mike is free to go home so he can return to work.
Our dear friend Zayde is meeting us tonight at Monserrate (the infamous mountain where my first book concluded). We plan to return to the top of the mountain, have a special dinner to welcome Juan David to the family, and take pictures as a a celebration of all the success that today signifies.
Our papers can now be presented to the courts, and next week we will start with Juan David's medical exams. The following week, we have permission to travel on a little vacation outside of Bogota with our friends (Zayde's family), who we traveled with last summer when we went to Apulo. I will post our new family pictures this evening or tomorrow morning.
June 19, 2013
Settling in
We've been here for a week and a half now and have almost completed our first week with Juan David. After getting things set up (rooms, closets, refrigerator, telephones, internet, etc.) and getting reacquainted with friends, we finally started to settle in and let the realities of our new life sink in. I won't say that the tension did not start to mount around here rather quickly, but David and I had a long, heart-to-heart talk last night that led to a new daily schedule that we will commit to follow whenever it is in our control. I also wrote out some basic ground rules that we found to be necessary to keep everyone happy. (With David, we've never had much of a need for rules--just basic principles and values that guide how we live.) So now everything's written out in both English and Spanish, and we have it all set under the glass in the main table so everyone can see it.
As a teacher, I should have known how much more secure a simple schedule would make everyone feel, but somehow it surprised me to see both boys checking and following the schedule almost religiously today. Now they know when they can watch TV, when they can play on the computer, when it's time to go outside, when we're going to play a game together, when it's time to be quiet and read, when they can have a snack, when we're going to eat our meals, and when it's time to practice English. I even know when I will have a chance to check my e-mail or write on my blog. Hopefully it's a good start to a great summer together even though everyone is living out of their comfort zone. I know we still have a whole world of challenges ahead of us, but all we can do is just take things a day at a time.
My summer Bible study is starting this evening back home. I am saddened to not be part of it, but I am so encouraged to hear how many have signed up for it. I know without a doubt that God laid that study on my heart to teach because it's the study He prepared for all of those ladies this summer. I'm so grateful for my friend who agreed to lead it in my absence. :)
Unfortunately, I didn't bring a single Bible study workbook with me this summer due to space. However, today I got out David's little Bible and have committed myself to memorize the rest of the book of James that I didn't finish memorizing during our last study.
As a teacher, I should have known how much more secure a simple schedule would make everyone feel, but somehow it surprised me to see both boys checking and following the schedule almost religiously today. Now they know when they can watch TV, when they can play on the computer, when it's time to go outside, when we're going to play a game together, when it's time to be quiet and read, when they can have a snack, when we're going to eat our meals, and when it's time to practice English. I even know when I will have a chance to check my e-mail or write on my blog. Hopefully it's a good start to a great summer together even though everyone is living out of their comfort zone. I know we still have a whole world of challenges ahead of us, but all we can do is just take things a day at a time.
My summer Bible study is starting this evening back home. I am saddened to not be part of it, but I am so encouraged to hear how many have signed up for it. I know without a doubt that God laid that study on my heart to teach because it's the study He prepared for all of those ladies this summer. I'm so grateful for my friend who agreed to lead it in my absence. :)
Unfortunately, I didn't bring a single Bible study workbook with me this summer due to space. However, today I got out David's little Bible and have committed myself to memorize the rest of the book of James that I didn't finish memorizing during our last study.
June 17, 2013
Missing pieces
They say that one thing that's especially hard for adoptive children and adoptive families is dealing with a life full of missing pieces. I thought about that when I looked through Juan David's memory book that the orphanage gave him. A handful of pictures from his childhood, and that's it. Fifteen years old and he walked away with a small backpack, the clothes he had on that day, and a little memory book. Everything else stayed behind. I'm thankful for the pictures we have from when he came to the States. I'm thankful for the pictures that I've gathered from Julian over the last three years. Yet so many years remain missing.
Yesterday I took a walk with our friend who knew the three of them since they were little. Julian specifically asked me not to take Juan David down a certain street close to where he lives, so I left Mike and the boys playing on the soccer field while I took a walk with her to get ice cream. Before I knew it, she started pointing out several of the places where they had lived. She told me how and where she met them and explained the kind of childhood they lived.
She filled in so many missing pieces, stuff that I'll never find accounted for in the paperwork they gave us. Stuff that doesn't even exist in their files. She's also pretty sure she has a bunch of pictures stored away somewhere that she promised she will try to dig out for me. I'm so thankful for her and for the God-ordained connection that I have with her. I also thank God for giving her the opportunity to be reconnected with both of the boys, now many years later.
Yesterday I took a walk with our friend who knew the three of them since they were little. Julian specifically asked me not to take Juan David down a certain street close to where he lives, so I left Mike and the boys playing on the soccer field while I took a walk with her to get ice cream. Before I knew it, she started pointing out several of the places where they had lived. She told me how and where she met them and explained the kind of childhood they lived.
She filled in so many missing pieces, stuff that I'll never find accounted for in the paperwork they gave us. Stuff that doesn't even exist in their files. She's also pretty sure she has a bunch of pictures stored away somewhere that she promised she will try to dig out for me. I'm so thankful for her and for the God-ordained connection that I have with her. I also thank God for giving her the opportunity to be reconnected with both of the boys, now many years later.
June 15, 2013
Feels like home
The best part of coming to Colombia (besides adopting Juan David) is being able to reconnect with great friends that we've made over the last two years. It makes it feel like home.
Yesterday we took the boys to El Camino Academy (where we volunteered to teach/help out with summer schoo last year). We wanted to see everyone again, David specifically wanted to see the P.E. teacher, and we wanted to show Juan David where we spent all of our time last summer (and might possibly do again in future summers when we come to visit his brother). It was so good to see everyone again and catch up with each other. We stayed for a few hours while the boys played soccer together outside on the field.
Around noon, we went to one of our closest friend's houses with some of the other summer school teachers (from the U.S.) because she was going to show us how prepare and serve a famous Colombian dish called Bandeja Paisa. I got a crash course on making the beans, the plantains, the sausage etc,.--even the juice! There were four of us squeezed into a tiny kitchen with food cooking on every burner, in the oven, on a skillet, or just sitting on the counter. We had a great time, and then we all sat down to quite the delicious Colombian meal.
Tomorrow that same friend invited us to her church for Father's Day (we went to that church once last year, but with Julian). Then our dear, dear friend Mercedes invited us over for lunch tomorrow afternoon (she has known Juan David and Julian since they were very little, and Julian lives at her house.) Both of these friends are an absolute treasure to us, and we don't take a minute with them for granite.
Our boys are doing well together. Both are improving in their language skills, learning and practicing the other one's language. All they need is a soccer ball (when outside) or a nerf gun (while inside) to keep them happy.
Next week we plan to go ride the infamous go-karts that we go to every year and head back up to the top of the mountain sometime (Montserrate) for a new family picture. We'll see what else comes about next week before Mike will return to the States.
Today we caught up on laundry (I'm so thankful for having a dryer this year), went grocery shopping, ate pizza, and watched a movie we found on TV. Tonight, thanks to Lake Pointe's Internet campus, we get to go to our own church. :)
Hanging out at our old apartments from last year
Playing on the soccer field at El Camino Academy
Just climbing around right outside our friend, Jenn's, office
Yesterday we took the boys to El Camino Academy (where we volunteered to teach/help out with summer schoo last year). We wanted to see everyone again, David specifically wanted to see the P.E. teacher, and we wanted to show Juan David where we spent all of our time last summer (and might possibly do again in future summers when we come to visit his brother). It was so good to see everyone again and catch up with each other. We stayed for a few hours while the boys played soccer together outside on the field.
Around noon, we went to one of our closest friend's houses with some of the other summer school teachers (from the U.S.) because she was going to show us how prepare and serve a famous Colombian dish called Bandeja Paisa. I got a crash course on making the beans, the plantains, the sausage etc,.--even the juice! There were four of us squeezed into a tiny kitchen with food cooking on every burner, in the oven, on a skillet, or just sitting on the counter. We had a great time, and then we all sat down to quite the delicious Colombian meal.
Tomorrow that same friend invited us to her church for Father's Day (we went to that church once last year, but with Julian). Then our dear, dear friend Mercedes invited us over for lunch tomorrow afternoon (she has known Juan David and Julian since they were very little, and Julian lives at her house.) Both of these friends are an absolute treasure to us, and we don't take a minute with them for granite.
Our boys are doing well together. Both are improving in their language skills, learning and practicing the other one's language. All they need is a soccer ball (when outside) or a nerf gun (while inside) to keep them happy.
Next week we plan to go ride the infamous go-karts that we go to every year and head back up to the top of the mountain sometime (Montserrate) for a new family picture. We'll see what else comes about next week before Mike will return to the States.
Today we caught up on laundry (I'm so thankful for having a dryer this year), went grocery shopping, ate pizza, and watched a movie we found on TV. Tonight, thanks to Lake Pointe's Internet campus, we get to go to our own church. :)
Hanging out at our old apartments from last yearPlaying on the soccer field at El Camino AcademyJust climbing around right outside our friend, Jenn's, office
June 13, 2013
Gotcha Day
I suppose we have finally experienced what they call "Gotcha Day". It's not the day the actual adoption decree is signed, but it's the day that our child was finally given to us and placed under our care. We signed papers for provisional custody of Juan David, and they told him we are now his parents. We are his family. We meet again next Thursday to discuss how things went over our first week together. They will interview all of us, including him, and as long as everyone is still in agreement to proceed with the adoption, then our lawyer can present our paperwork to the courts. (That's when Mike can go back home to return to work while the rest of us stay through the court process.) Our lawyer said that should take 2-3 weeks before we sign the adoption decree, then it goes before the U.S. Embassy, which is probably another week or so, and then we come home. Anything could happen to delay any of those steps--it is all just a guide to go by. All I know is that he said he has no intention of keeping us in Colombia any longer than is absolutely necessary, so he will do all he can to make it go as quickly as possible. That man is a miracle worker and I have complete confidence in him. When we were leaving our "meeting place" today, he looked right at Juan David and let him know just how difficult this case really was. Both lawyers couldn''t stop telling him what a wonderful opportunity he's been given and also what an immense advantage he has because he has a bilingual mother to communicate with easily throughout this transition. We left the office, took a taxi to the mall, ate lunch together, and then he asked if we could go to a shoe store because he needed new shoes. We planned on getting him new shoes, anyway, but he had some money that they gave me that he'd earned at a job, and he wanted to use it to buy new soccer shoes for both him and David. We'd thought about putting his money in an account at home, but this was something he wanted to do and we didn't want to deny him the privilege of doing something so kind for David. David was so overwhelmed with gratitude that he just wrapped his arms around Juan David in a huge hug right in the middle of the shoe store. I'll never forget it. We saved the rest of the money and will start an account for him at home.
Once we got home to the apartment and showed him around, let the boys have a nerf-gun war, and watched a little TV, we broke out the Colombia version of Monopoly to play together. Wow. I do believe David and I have found our match at Monopoly. Juan David ended up owning the entire board, driving us all to bankruptcy. I knew he enjoyed Math, and now I saw all that mathematical thinking and reasoning in action!
Our journey to Juan David started in June of 1998 with two little pictures that came through on an e-mail from a summer hosting program. Actually, there were fourteen little pictures, but only two of them caught my eye and my heart. I cut them out, put them on the refrigerator, and we all began to pray for the two children in those pictures. Five years later, guess what I found in the packet of papers and documents that his social worker gave me today? The originals of those two pictures. Both of them. Talk about a story coming full circle. Wow. The orphanage also gave him a memory book of pictures, and the very first picture in the book is of all three siblings together, including Julian. A picture that none of them knew existed. I will treasure it forever.
June 12, 2013
Kitchen disasters already
If you know me, you know that the kitchen is one of my least favorite places to be. Not only do I hate cooking, I'm just not comfortable with anything that is kitchen related. Yes, we get by on the basic dinners, but only if they're quick and easy. So, you can imagine that if I'm not comfortable in my own kitchen, I'm definitely not comfortable in a foreign one.
Well, I've been here for a total of four days so far, and I'm already having disasters in the kitchen. First, I used the wrong kind of dish in the oven (hey, it was stored with all the casserole dishes....), and it broke. Then this afternoon I went to get a glass out of the strainer when it just randomly broke. Early this evening, Julian was with us, and I worked hard to make a nice little dinner for us. I made some breaded chicken patties in the oven and also baked some french fries. I took the chicken patties out, laid some cheese on them, and put them back in to finish. Finally, I took it all out of the oven and set both dishes on the stove. Mmmm. It all sure looked really good. I put a chicken patty and some fries on one plate, and as I went to set it down, the dish with the chicken patties started sliding off the stove, landing upside down on the floor, shattering into pieces. Not only did I destroy the casserole dish, but there went dinner. The second I heard the crash, I screamed, and poor Julian came running to my rescue, grabbing a broom to sweep up all the glass. We didn't lose the french fries or the first chicken patty I'd already served on a plate, so Julian got the yummy dinner, while the rest of us quickly made up some ham sandwiches to eat with our french fries.
I'm going to have to start a list of everything that I'll need to replace before I leave. Let's hope it doesn't get too much longer or we're going to have to start eating off of napkins.
Well, I've been here for a total of four days so far, and I'm already having disasters in the kitchen. First, I used the wrong kind of dish in the oven (hey, it was stored with all the casserole dishes....), and it broke. Then this afternoon I went to get a glass out of the strainer when it just randomly broke. Early this evening, Julian was with us, and I worked hard to make a nice little dinner for us. I made some breaded chicken patties in the oven and also baked some french fries. I took the chicken patties out, laid some cheese on them, and put them back in to finish. Finally, I took it all out of the oven and set both dishes on the stove. Mmmm. It all sure looked really good. I put a chicken patty and some fries on one plate, and as I went to set it down, the dish with the chicken patties started sliding off the stove, landing upside down on the floor, shattering into pieces. Not only did I destroy the casserole dish, but there went dinner. The second I heard the crash, I screamed, and poor Julian came running to my rescue, grabbing a broom to sweep up all the glass. We didn't lose the french fries or the first chicken patty I'd already served on a plate, so Julian got the yummy dinner, while the rest of us quickly made up some ham sandwiches to eat with our french fries.
I'm going to have to start a list of everything that I'll need to replace before I leave. Let's hope it doesn't get too much longer or we're going to have to start eating off of napkins.
One brother today, the other tomorrow
Soooooooooooo good to see Julian again. He's definitely matured and is growing int
o a responsible young man. He got to our apartment and immediately asked if he could finish a homework assignment. Here he is, working hard.
o a responsible young man. He got to our apartment and immediately asked if he could finish a homework assignment. Here he is, working hard.
One more day
One more day remains until our lives will change forever. One more day until Juan David joins us. One more day for David to be an only child. One more day for us to be a little family of three. (Well, officially a family of three because unofficially we still include Julian). One more day until our home becomes a very bilingual home again--this time not just for a month while we're abroad.
Lots of change ahead--including both excitement and also grieving. Juan David was as happy as ever to find out that he's finally being adopted. Yet we know that he will go through a grieving process as he leaves behind his country, his culture, his language, his school, his friends, and sadly, his brother. I can't imagine the range of emotions that he is experiencing today, getting ready to be reunited with us tomorrow morning. A moment that we told him last summer would likely not happen. We promised him we'd be back, but we told him that we probably would not be able to get his adoption case reopened.
Actually, we got our flights (with approval from both lawyers and our agency) with the assumption that we'd be getting Juan David either yesterday or today. Then the morning after purchasing our flights and applying for our visas, our lawyer wrote to confirm that the official date would be tomorrow. That kind-of lengthened our stay for a few extra days, but I think God planned it that way for David's sake. I think he needed to get adjusted and feel comfortable first so that he can welcome Juan David with open arms. We gave him the choice to go back early with Mike or to stay the long-haul with me and Juan David. We figured he could see how he felt when Mike gets ready to leave. Well, he loves it here so much already that he told me yesterday, "I've already made my decision to stay." We'll still ask him again when it's time for Mike to leave, but I'm glad he's so happy to be here.
I'm also glad we didn't get Juan David yet because I, personally, needed time to adjust to the change in altitude. I had a headache for the first two days that went away with some ibuprofen. But yesterday I felt completely knocked out and wanted to sleep all day. I felt the same way last year when we came back from Apulo, a place at a much lower elevation. So thankfully I knew that I just needed to rest and drink a lot of water. I'm feeling much better today.
Today I think we'll make a small breakfast and then head out to find a gift to give Juan David tomorrow. We're leaning towards a soccer ball, but we'll see what we come across. Julian got permission to be off work today, so he's joining us around mid-day. We haven't seen him at all yet, so I'm really looking forward to spending the day with him.
Lots of change ahead--including both excitement and also grieving. Juan David was as happy as ever to find out that he's finally being adopted. Yet we know that he will go through a grieving process as he leaves behind his country, his culture, his language, his school, his friends, and sadly, his brother. I can't imagine the range of emotions that he is experiencing today, getting ready to be reunited with us tomorrow morning. A moment that we told him last summer would likely not happen. We promised him we'd be back, but we told him that we probably would not be able to get his adoption case reopened.
Actually, we got our flights (with approval from both lawyers and our agency) with the assumption that we'd be getting Juan David either yesterday or today. Then the morning after purchasing our flights and applying for our visas, our lawyer wrote to confirm that the official date would be tomorrow. That kind-of lengthened our stay for a few extra days, but I think God planned it that way for David's sake. I think he needed to get adjusted and feel comfortable first so that he can welcome Juan David with open arms. We gave him the choice to go back early with Mike or to stay the long-haul with me and Juan David. We figured he could see how he felt when Mike gets ready to leave. Well, he loves it here so much already that he told me yesterday, "I've already made my decision to stay." We'll still ask him again when it's time for Mike to leave, but I'm glad he's so happy to be here.
I'm also glad we didn't get Juan David yet because I, personally, needed time to adjust to the change in altitude. I had a headache for the first two days that went away with some ibuprofen. But yesterday I felt completely knocked out and wanted to sleep all day. I felt the same way last year when we came back from Apulo, a place at a much lower elevation. So thankfully I knew that I just needed to rest and drink a lot of water. I'm feeling much better today.
Today I think we'll make a small breakfast and then head out to find a gift to give Juan David tomorrow. We're leaning towards a soccer ball, but we'll see what we come across. Julian got permission to be off work today, so he's joining us around mid-day. We haven't seen him at all yet, so I'm really looking forward to spending the day with him.
