Rachelle D. Alspaugh's Blog, page 68

You're treating me like a child!

That's right, sweetheart.  Enjoy it.  It's a childhood you didn't get to experience fully, and you'll never get it back. 

Sometimes I get frustrated when I see the gaps, the lack of responsibility or even a sense of responsibility that I see in you, my 16 year old child.  The arrogance can eat away at me, especially when that arrogance only shows the absolute naivety of the culture you're now in. 

Sometimes I want to cringe when you complain that I'm treating you like a child, not giving you privileges or responsibilities that you either have not earned yet or are just not ready for yet. 

As annoyed as I got the other day when you couldn't stop making silly sound effects on our bike ride, I was reminded that you are still a child at heart.  Yes, you may have had a bike at one time in the past, but you obviously missed out on certain experiences on that bike in your childhood because I see you enjoying those silly moments now.  Making sound effects.  Finding ways to make it sound like a motorcycle.  Pretending there are sports announcers talking about how fast you ride.  Experimenting with different moves. Things I remember watching David experience as a very young child. 

I caught myself saying, "You act like a child who's never been on a bike before!" Then it hit me.  That's exactly what you act like.  And it's okay.  I tried to explain to your younger brother that you're living out things you missed in your childhood. Enjoy them while you still can.  They're essential to your character and to the person you are supposed to become.  Don't rush into an adulthood you're not ready for when you still have an opportunity to tap into that child within you. 

In fact, it wasn't just you that missed that childhood.  We missed it, too.  Creating a few more childhood memories even at the age of 16 can only benefit us all.

Taking on the life of an author

  Book signing at Half Price Books, Garland, TX   
         Me with my dear friend, Regina Stone Matthews (also an author)
Today's book signing (the beginning of a relaunch of my first book) turned out to be a lot of fun.  I think I'm a little more experienced and confident as a writer than I was two years ago while attempting to launch the book the first time. (Okay, honestly, I didn't have a clue what I was doing then.)  I still don't know how to draw a stranger to my table or what kind of spiel to use even if I could draw them, but I felt so encouraged by all of the support from friends from all over who came out.  I had people stop by from my current Bible study, my writer's group, my school, my Life Group, and even our dear nurse who gave David his allergy shots for five years.  Many of the people that stopped by brought their own friends and family to meet me. The bookstore also did a great job and welcomed me back anytime, especially once I get the sequel published.
Becoming an author has been a dream come true for me, something I've envisioned and hoped to do since elementary school.  I always knew that writing was my outlet.  There are parts of the role that thrill and excite me, other parts that challenge me, and others yet that I will admit are way out of my comfort zone.  
I love holding the book in my hands or hearing people talk about how it affected them as they read it.  I love being part of a writer's group where I am constantly devouring every little thing I learn from the other writers in the room.  I walk in like an empty sponge and walk out ready to drip all over the place.  I love meeting other authors and editors who share my passion to write.  
I enjoyed today's book signing, but it's also a challenge for this natural introvert.  I do okay when someone I invited shows up at my table.  I am good at making conversation and enjoying their company.  It's attracting the stranger that challenges me, coming up with the right thing to say to even try to draw one to my table.  I plan on doing a few more book signings before I am ready to launch the second book, but that's not to say it's not a challenge for my personality.  I grow a little bit in confidence with each one, though.  Plus I've gotten a lot more confident about asking around in different places to let me do one.  Indiana friends, I'm headed your way next just for a one day signing, once I get a confirmation on the date and time.  
So what part of being an author goes way beyond my comfort zone?  Marketing.  I hate any and every part of it.  I'm a word of mouth kind of girl.  I love the people that have read the book and then recommended it or passed it on to someone else.  I can't seem to get a single person to write a review on Amazon or West Bow (other than the first one to do so within a week of its release), so that doesn't help me out much.  I hate self-advertising and trying to come up with new ways to attract people to my book.  I hate being "harassed"  (for lack of a better word) by my book consultant about how low my sales are and what I can do to make sure that doesn't keep happening. What bugs me more is that so many of their marketing tips for me include shelling out more money I don't have. (Thus why I'm going a different route completely to publish the second book.  I think my goals and visions for my book are a bit more defined at this point, so I have a better sense of direction). I detest putting forth so much time and energy into advertising myself, yet I know how critical it is.  I see that even very well-known authors are constantly sending out e-mails and social media messages to advertise their latest book.  If they have to do it, certainly I would need to, as well.  
All in all, it's a fun, inspiring, challenging, way-out-of-my-comfort-zone experience to finally become the author I've always dreamed of becoming.    I learn more about this new role and lifestyle every day.  With all that said, I look forward to the rest of what's to come of this relaunching of my book, as well as to the publishing experience of the sequel.  Thank you to everyone who came out today to support me in this journey (both in the writing journey and the adoption journey).  

Stranger things have happened....

While my friends back in Indiana and Pennsylvania are knee-deep in snow right now, we Texans got blasted with our yearly inch or two of white fluff yesterday, bringing all of life to a halt. 

I will say that I'm grateful my district decided to humor me with a snow day today--hey, when nobody around here has any experience with snow, the roads can be quite a dangerous place.  I had a nice, long, quiet morning while I let the boys sleep.  I got caught up on a few things that I'd gotten behind on, I did some laundry and cleaned up in the kitchen.  Later the boys played in the snow, made little Texas-sized snowmen (not everything is bigger in Texas!), we had a nice hot lunch together, and then we went to see a movie.

Had we gone to school today, things would have been a bit rushed.  David was supposed to have a choir party after school, getting him home just in time to finish packing for D-NOW weekend with the youth at church.  We planned to eat a quick, light dinner before taking him in the evening. Juan David wasn't going to be able to go at all because his soccer tournament had games scheduled till 9:00 tomorrow night.  He was pretty excited and eager for his tournament, though.

Late this afternoon, they decided to postpone D-Now to start in the morning rather than tonight.  Then during dinner, we got a text from JD's coach saying that the tournament had cancelled again, not to be rescheduled this time.  He sure was bummed out!  The good news is: he gets to go to D-Now tomorrow with David.  The bad news is: I'm seeing a pattern in this boy's life regarding getting all pumped up about something coming, only to have it fall apart or disappear at the last minute....(First us, then the second family, then once he got here, the first retreat, then the marathon, and then the soccer tournament.)   Makes you wonder what God may be trying to teach him.  I feel for him, though.  This tournament was a pretty big deal to him.

One more event on my calendar!

Women's Conference: Fresh Grounded Faith The first Bible study I ever taught was by Stormie Omartian, The Power of a Praying Wife.  Not long after it ended, I taught a study by Jennifer Rothschild, Walking by Faith--Lessons I Learned in the Dark.  I knew immediately when I saw this advertisement that I needed to go to this conference right here in Plano!  I get to see both of these authors in person at the same time, two authors who have had a profound effect on my life and my journey of faith.    

Lots of stuff going on :)

The next few months hold a lot of good, fun activity. :)  Lots to look forward to.  A book signing at my favorite local bookstore.  Valentine's Day. Juan David's big soccer tournament that got postponed from December.  A ten week Bible study starting up in a few days.  The boys are registered for DNOW (Disciple Now, a sort-of retreat like atmosphere in people's homes led by college students) next weekend. (Juan David won't be able to attend the whole thing because of his tournament, but we still registered him and requested for him to be in the same home as his cousin, Zane.)

We're planning a road trip for spring break in March to take Juan David to meet more of his family on the Alspaugh side, making stops in Columbus, Warsaw, and then St. Louis on the way home.  It will be fun to show Juan David where Mike grew up and fell in love with the outdoors, where we went to high school, where we worked, where we went to church, where I graduated from college, etc. I even tentatively set up a book signing back at my favorite coffee shop. :) More details to come on that after we confirm the date and times.  Looking forward to it!  We also look forward to meeting our newest niece and nephew.

I hope to have things ready to start the publishing process for my second book sometime that month after we come home.  We'll see how things go between now and then.

Mike and I will be celebrating our 15th wedding anniversary in April.  We're planning a little trip together to San Antonio for a night, and then we're heading from there to Mexico to attend our sweet friend Madai's wedding.  The boys will be staying with their cousins for the weekend while we're gone.  The day after we come back, Julian will turn 21.  I'm still pondering over what we should do for him to let him know just how special he is to us.

Besides the big things, we've got a whole new soccer season ahead of us as well.  David's first game should be in about three weeks.  Juan David's actual season doesn't start until the end of March, so hopefully that means we'll have less overlapping games.  I hate it when I have to choose which child's game I'm going to watch because they play at the same time.

Once again, I can't even begin to say how grateful I am to be teaching PreK because I feel so much more relaxed than I have in a very long time.  I adore my kids and absolutely love my job this year.  They send me home with a smile every day and bring me back still smiling every morning.

Next book signing!

Come by and grab a book for a discounted rate ($10 per book, check or cash) on the day of the book signing!  Plus get a sneak peek at the sequel coming soon!

Doing things a bit differently

Two years ago, about this time, only a few weeks remained until my first copy of my first book came out in print.  I loved every aspect of holding that book in my hands, especially the hard copy.  A dream come true. Yet now that I'm fine tuning the sequel to that book, I'm thankful for a chance to do things differently this time.

I was so surprised that the first book came flowing out of me the way it did that I didn't take my time in researching or preparing for it to be published.  I didn't even know that a writer's critique group actually existed in my local vicinity, now I wouldn't even think of trying to publish anything without taking parts of it to be critiqued by the Christian writer's group that I am now a part of (right within the walls of my own church--at the Rockwall campus).  I have learned a wealth of information about good writing, editing, revising, and publishing and book launching from each member of the group.  I guess, more than anything, I've learned just how much I really don't know about writing and how much I still can benefit to learn.  I am anxiously awaiting our monthly meeting just a week away from today.

So, with that being said, I'm taking my time with this book.  All the things that I've looked back on from the first book and thought, "I wish I would have done that differently," have inspired me to really do them differently.  Asking more people to give it a test read, asking for the critical comments to know how to revise parts of the story this time.  Asking for more people to write recommendations to be included in the book.  Going a completely different route with how to get it published.  Putting the manuscript down and not touching it for awhile until I can get feedback from several different people. Finding out how to actually launch the second book--which I didn't even know to do the first time.  They say you learn from experience.  I've definitely learned a ton and am so thankful for all of my new author friends that have helped me on this journey.  Love them dearly!

Then and now

I ran the table for the Adoption Ministry at our church ministry fair this weekend, at least for two of the services.  Here was my table a year ago:

 
I had pictures of my soon to be son, knowing that anything could still go wrong at any moment.  I had books that I'd read and was reading, and I even took my Cabbage Patch dolls with their adoption papers, along with my little Orphan Annie doll.  My pastor had put me in charge of the Adoption ministry at my church after endorsing my first book, though I wasn't an adoptive mother yet.  
Here is a picture of my Adoption Ministry table today:

No need for a cabbage patch doll.  I took a real prop this time.  My son. :)
How cool to have people walk by and say, "Is this the young man we prayed for for so long?"  Then, looking into his eyes, "Young man, do you have any idea how much we prayed for you to come home?"
We didn't have a lot of people stop by the booth for information about or with interest in the adoption ministry.  However, I did talk for a bit with two mothers in the process of fostering to adopt, and another adoptive mother, and we all realized together how much we need to connect with one another.  I plan to look into starting some type of support group for the few families we have so we can have that connection with other adoptive or foster families.  They have groups at the main campus, but we've never had anything at our smaller campus as of yet.  I, personally, really appreciated talking with the other mothers today about our common struggles and challenges.   Looking forward to getting something set up for us to keep those conversations going. :)

The sequel!

 I can hardly believe it, but I finished my second book!  Now I've got to make it ready to be published, which will be quite some time yet, but at least the first draft is done.   I love how it just flows so naturally from the first book, yet I wrote the first one thinking it would be a stand alone story.  God knew all along.

Starting up again

All I can say is, I'm so glad I'm not in the same place I was last year at this time.  Talk about stress!  Last January we sent our second completed dossier to Colombia, thus "ending" the U.S. side, or our part, of the adoption process.  I never would have imagined at that point that the rest of the process would continue to stretch on for six more entire months. Ugh.  Life still presents itself with new challenges every single day, but at least our son is home.  We're not chasing paper after paper, seal after seal to get him here. 

I looked back to my blog a year ago, and this was my main goal:


My goal for the year:  Trust God.  Every day.  For Everything.  Every year is life-changing.  I have a feeling this one is going to be more life-changing than ever. 
So, my new goal for this year: Trust God. Every day. For everything.  I want to read more, to write more, and to get out and live more.  I want to spend more one-on-one time with all of my boys, including Mike.  It makes a huge difference in my connection to each of them. 
It's amazing what a two week break can do for you.  Mike bought me four new books by Beth Wiseman, who writes fiction romance books set in the Amish community of Lancaster County, PA.  I read three of them already.  I set myself a goal to finish writing my second book early this year.  I told Mike that all I needed was a solid day to myself without any distractions, so he took the boys out yesterday so I could write.  Six hours later, I finished the book!  I've got lots of editing and revising to do now, plus I need to decide how to go about publishing it this time, but the first draft is finally done.  It felt so good to finish it!  I've enjoyed seeing how many people have been waiting on it. :)
Soccer starts up again in another month, as well as our spring Bible study.  I am looking forward to teaching one of my favorite studies ever, Living Beyond Yourself, by Beth Moore.  It's an in-depth study on the fruit of the Spirit, and I will have to say that it's one of the most life-changing studies I've ever done.  I've mentioned it over and over in almost every Bible study I've taught, but the church didn't own it.  You can imagine my excitement when I finally saw it on the list of available studies to teach this year.  We start on February 5th, just a month away. I can't wait!