Rachelle D. Alspaugh's Blog, page 66
April 17, 2014
Tuesday, April 15th--TAX DAY
By this time every year, tax day doesn't really mean much because we've usually already filed, gotten a refund, and felt more secure with a cushion in our savings again. This year I began the day driving through the post office to file an extension for the first time ever.
If I thought Colombian paperwork with the government was bad, I can't say the U.S. has seemed much better (or quicker). First we found ourselves waiting much longer than normal for Juan's certificate of citizenship. They said getting a social security card would be easy after that. Really? What was supposed to take two weeks (or four at the most) is now dragging into eight weeks. Even a four week wait would have had his card here in time to get our taxes done. Nope. Nothing. Still. We've called several times, only to say the # hasn't been issued yet.
If I thought Colombian paperwork with the government was bad, I can't say the U.S. has seemed much better (or quicker). First we found ourselves waiting much longer than normal for Juan's certificate of citizenship. They said getting a social security card would be easy after that. Really? What was supposed to take two weeks (or four at the most) is now dragging into eight weeks. Even a four week wait would have had his card here in time to get our taxes done. Nope. Nothing. Still. We've called several times, only to say the # hasn't been issued yet.
Monday, April 14th
Wishing a happy, happy 21st birthday to our other sweet son, Julian. Juan David's biological brother. The boy "responsible" for keeping us in Juan David's life and for voicing his heart to the Colombian officials over our case, convincing them that his brother belonged with us. Some days I really miss that boy. I know that the fact that our hearts are so tied to Julian has really helped our bonding with Juan David.
I got a coupon to make a free photo book on Shutterfly, so I made a book for Julian. Unfortunately, it hasn't arrived yet, but he knows it's coming. It turned out absolutely beautiful. I hope he will always cherish the pics of him and his brother together this summer on our trip to Villa de Leyva.
We also made a short video for him, saying happy birthday, and sent it his way.
The day ended with a quick dinner and early evening soccer game in the freezing cold, which seemed even colder having just come from 90 degree weather in Texas.
I got a coupon to make a free photo book on Shutterfly, so I made a book for Julian. Unfortunately, it hasn't arrived yet, but he knows it's coming. It turned out absolutely beautiful. I hope he will always cherish the pics of him and his brother together this summer on our trip to Villa de Leyva.
We also made a short video for him, saying happy birthday, and sent it his way.
The day ended with a quick dinner and early evening soccer game in the freezing cold, which seemed even colder having just come from 90 degree weather in Texas.
Sunday, April 13th
Another morning to sleep in, at least a little bit. Some friends who live in Round Rock mentioned that they'd love for us to stop by on our drive back home (the ones who led our very first trip to Piedras Negras seven years ago when we met Madai, also the ones who let us stay at their house the weekend that we met Juan David and his sister). We hadn't seen them in a few years, so we made arrangements to get together with them for an early dinner. Our plan was to leave around 11:30 to make sure we'd get there by four. We figured we could spend about two hours with them before heading home, getting us home by around 8:30 or so.
However, we woke up with an hour left for breakfast. Mmmmmm. Those chilaquiles just melted in our mouths! (Reminded us of when we had the same delicious breakfast at a hotel in Mexico City during our honeymoom). After breakfast, we packed up and ended up leaving at 11:30 to go bid Madai goodbye and see her new house. Then an hour later, we found ourselves still waiting in line to cross the border back into the United States.
Though an hour later than planned, we enjoyed every minute (and bite) at our friends' house in Round Rock. What a blessing to spend an early evening with them.
By seven o'clock, we couldn't resist David's pleas via texts, asking us to please get back on the road toward home. He missed us. :( We got home by ten o'clock. Falling into bed was not an option, though, because we came home to a pretty urgent house repair and to two boys who wanted to go through their goodie bags right away.
Monday morning came way too fast. "Okay, if I can just make it through the next three days, life will finally slow down enough to catch my breath....."
However, we woke up with an hour left for breakfast. Mmmmmm. Those chilaquiles just melted in our mouths! (Reminded us of when we had the same delicious breakfast at a hotel in Mexico City during our honeymoom). After breakfast, we packed up and ended up leaving at 11:30 to go bid Madai goodbye and see her new house. Then an hour later, we found ourselves still waiting in line to cross the border back into the United States.
Though an hour later than planned, we enjoyed every minute (and bite) at our friends' house in Round Rock. What a blessing to spend an early evening with them.
By seven o'clock, we couldn't resist David's pleas via texts, asking us to please get back on the road toward home. He missed us. :( We got home by ten o'clock. Falling into bed was not an option, though, because we came home to a pretty urgent house repair and to two boys who wanted to go through their goodie bags right away.
Monday morning came way too fast. "Okay, if I can just make it through the next three days, life will finally slow down enough to catch my breath....."
April 11th-12th
After leaving San Antonio, we arrived in Mexico within less than three hours. After meeting up with Madai and her husband-to-be at McDonald's to get directions to the hotel from her, we headed to our hotel and rested for the entire afternoon until our friends also arrived later that night. We held off on dinner and ended up ordering pizzas at ten thirty at night! I always made Juan David order delivery for me in Colombia because I hate making the order over the phone in Spanish, but I survived. That pizza was delicious!
Saturday turned out to be a full day in Mexico. We slept in late, enjoyed an amazing complimentary Mexican breakfast (you can never go wrong with authentic chilaquiles!), walked around for quite a while, shopped at the "bodega" to buy the boys a stash of Mexican candies, sat by the pool for a coffee break, and we even went shopping at the market! We're all stocked up again on our pure vanilla, soccer shirts, and a Mexican shirt for me in my favorite color.
The wedding started that evening at 7:00. Madai made such a beautiful, adorable bride. After the wedding, we proceeded to the reception hall at 9:00. We sat with our friends from home (who are like family to Madai), and we just had an absolute blast hanging out with them that night. What a great family! We love them dearly. The party likely went till about 3 a.m., but we all left by 1:00 and just crashed.
It will be so fun to share an anniversary (close) with my sweet, sweet friend, Madai. Love her dearly.
Saturday turned out to be a full day in Mexico. We slept in late, enjoyed an amazing complimentary Mexican breakfast (you can never go wrong with authentic chilaquiles!), walked around for quite a while, shopped at the "bodega" to buy the boys a stash of Mexican candies, sat by the pool for a coffee break, and we even went shopping at the market! We're all stocked up again on our pure vanilla, soccer shirts, and a Mexican shirt for me in my favorite color.
The wedding started that evening at 7:00. Madai made such a beautiful, adorable bride. After the wedding, we proceeded to the reception hall at 9:00. We sat with our friends from home (who are like family to Madai), and we just had an absolute blast hanging out with them that night. What a great family! We love them dearly. The party likely went till about 3 a.m., but we all left by 1:00 and just crashed.
It will be so fun to share an anniversary (close) with my sweet, sweet friend, Madai. Love her dearly.
Thursday, April 10th
Happy Anniversary to my husband of now 15 years! I am in awe of all that we have been through, done together, grown, matured, and accomplished in these fifteen years.
We were blessed by, yes, SIX different friends to help us accomodate our boys and their schedules to we could get away on a quick little trip together on our own--a long overdue vacation as a couple. We hung for a night and half day in San Antonio. We went up in the Tower of the Americas, which overlooks San Antonio and celebrates the incredible mix of people, languages, and cultures that have mixed together here in Texas.
We got to end our time together in San Antonio with an amazing lunch at Texas Longhorn Steakhouse, compliments of a very surprising gift card from one of the ladies in my Bible study!
After that, we texted our sweet friend Madai and told her we were finally on our way to Mexico to witness her wedding!
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We were blessed by, yes, SIX different friends to help us accomodate our boys and their schedules to we could get away on a quick little trip together on our own--a long overdue vacation as a couple. We hung for a night and half day in San Antonio. We went up in the Tower of the Americas, which overlooks San Antonio and celebrates the incredible mix of people, languages, and cultures that have mixed together here in Texas.
We got to end our time together in San Antonio with an amazing lunch at Texas Longhorn Steakhouse, compliments of a very surprising gift card from one of the ladies in my Bible study!
After that, we texted our sweet friend Madai and told her we were finally on our way to Mexico to witness her wedding!
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Wednesday, April 9
Due to a busy weekend that was quite hectic to plan, I regret not having a chance to share this right away. However, I want to publicly acknowledge and congratulate my hard-working husband for being named Associate of the Year (out of 210 associates) at SAM'S Club! I'm so proud of him and know he is a well-respected guy over there with a great attitude.
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April 6, 2014
Twenty years!
Twenty years ago today
, Mike and I very shyly and slowly began a relationship that lasted for the rest of high school and college, leading us to the altar to make our vows to one another five years later. Here are some snapshots of us way back then during those high school years.
April 5, 2014
Liebster Blog Award
I am sending a thank you out to my dear friend, previous coworker, and fellow blogger, Ann Poppenfoose (http://christintheclouds.blogspot.com/) for nominating me for the Liebster Blog Award! It's just a cool way for Christian bloggers to recognize other Christian bloggers for inspiring them through their blogs. Plus it's a way to get to know one another better and share more about ourselves to our other readers. I will, in turn, choose other Christian bloggers to nominate for this award.
In response to this award, I have answered 11 creative questions that Ann made up for me to share on my blog. Enjoy learning a little bit more about me.
1. Describe yourself in three words. Sincere, reflective, determined
2. Who is your favorite author and why? Stormie Omartian--it's all about prayer. Without it, all our attempts at life are futile and meaningless.
3. What was the last thing you read, watched, and listened too? Read: Facebook Watched: Beth Moore's Living Beyond Yourself study, Session 7 Listened to: Beth Moore's Living Beyond Yourself study, Session 3 (Audio)
4. What is your favorite comfort food? Vanilla chai and dark chocolate
5. If you were a zoo animal, what would you be? Probably a bird of some kind, so I could fly
6. What accomplishment are you most proud of? Writing a book
7. What is your favorite season, and why? Spring. I love the weather, the flowers, and the newness of life. Plus I was born in the spring.
8. Who is your favorite Bible character and why? Either David or Esther. I love David because he wrote such tender poetry from his heart. I love Esther for her courage, despite all the odds against her.
9. What inspires you? Knowing that as long as I'm still here, I have not fulfilled my purpose.
10. What is something you like to do to relax? Writing relaxes me more than anything. I also like to ride my bike when the weather permits.
11. Which do you prefer visit...beach or mountains? Both. But only in the morning. I would love to spend a long, quiet morning overlooking the mountains or watching the sun rise on the beach.
Thanks, again, Ann! (http://christintheclouds.blogspot.com/) You have encouraged and inspired me, too!
God's timing, not mine
As I read through my Bible study this week in preparation to teach (Living Beyond Yourself by Beth Moore), I came across something I'd written in it nearly fourteen years ago that touched my heart.
Question: In what area of your life are you most needing to trust in God's faithfulness right now?
My answer: My desire to be a mommy, both naturally and by adoption
(Within a year or two later, God gave us David, naturally. We waited nearly 12 more years after that before God officially gave us Juan David, by adoption.)
Trust in His faithfulness. If He put the desire in your heart, He will be faithful to give it to you.
Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4
Question: In what area of your life are you most needing to trust in God's faithfulness right now?
My answer: My desire to be a mommy, both naturally and by adoption
(Within a year or two later, God gave us David, naturally. We waited nearly 12 more years after that before God officially gave us Juan David, by adoption.)
Trust in His faithfulness. If He put the desire in your heart, He will be faithful to give it to you.
Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4
April 1, 2014
Seeking some balance
We may not have a new baby in the house, but I still can find myself feeling just as ragged as a new mom some days. Adding our second child didn't come with the demands of a newborn, but it sure did bring on a whole new set of demands that are new to us. Managing time, I guess, has been the most challenging for me. Along with letting go of all the expectations I had and still have of myself.
I want to be that mom whose kids' friends feel comfortable talking to and being around. I want to be fun-loving and welcoming and hospitable. I want to be active and involved, the cheerleader and the confidant. The nurturer and the guide. I want my kids to know they can always come to me. Talk to me. Confide in me. I haven't kept much of all that up, though. Lately, all I've been is the grouch, the distrusting one, the critique, and the control freak. My main focus seems to be keeping an eye on the calendar to make sure everybody gets fed adequately and has a way to get to their appointed place on time.
I don't know how (or why) parents do it when they have multiple kids in multiple activities. We do three things in our home: school, church, soccer. Plus Mike and I each have a favorite pastime. He likes to work on his truck projects. I like to focus on my writing. I've realized lately that we can't do it all and still maintain our values as a family. Time to reprioritize.
God. Family. School. Recreation. It's all important, but if it's not in order, it doesn't work.
I'm crazy about commitment--100% commitment. If we say we're going to do it, we're going to be there 100%. Now I see that as another one of those high expectations I put upon myself that I have to let go every now and then.
Two amazing camping weekends just for guys with the youth pastor appeared on the youth schedule at church. A time of fellowship and to teach them how to man up and be the young men that God called them to be. We had to choose between that or soccer games or school activities that they're already committed to. We agreed that the church events had to come first. That decision sends a message about what our family values most. We wanted to make sure they got the right message.
We've had our 15 year anniversary trip to Mexico planned since the fall when Madai set her wedding date for the same weekend as our anniversary. We made arrangements for the boys to stay with people and still make it to school. Then the soccer schedules were finalized and three games in three different places and times appeared for the same weekend. One that went till 10:00 at night on a school night. Even though we had friends volunteer to help with transportation for the boys, I felt like it was too much to ask, so we actually considered changing our plans and shortening our trip. That decision would send a loud message to our boys, though. A message that says that their activities come before our marriage. We can't do that. We knew we needed to stick to our original plans. God blessed our decision quickly by having another friend volunteer to take care of the night game transportation. So unexpected, which made me even more grateful.
The calendar is always full of activities. Some for school that we can't avoid. Choir concerts, family nights, informational meetings. Some for adoptive purposes, likewise, that we can't avoid. Post-adoption paperwork. Immigration appointments. Applying for and waiting on a social security card. Post-placement visits, dates, and reports to keep up with. Some for church that are necessary for spiritual growth, like guys' camping trips, ladies' Bible study, home groups, etc. Others are beneficial and good, but need to be chosen based on what else has already filled the calendar. I had to swallow the fact that I can't teach a ten week Bible study, have two boys in soccer, keep up with school activities in three different schools, and still be able to attend my monthly writer's group. I hate missing it, but I also hate feeling pulled in so many directions at once that I no longer feel a passion for any of them.
There's a writer's conference coming up at the end of the month right here in Fort Worth taught by my friend from writer's group, Mary DeMuth, specifically on self-publishing your book. I know it's exactly what I need at this time so I can make sure I take the right steps to publish my second book, (truly the guidance I've been looking for), but for now it's just a maybe, a possibility. I can't add another thing to the calendar at the moment.
So, in a nutshell, this is my biggest struggle as a new adoptive mother. Managing a schedule with a new one added. Prioritizing and remembering what message my choice of activities sends to my children. Letting go of the high expectations I set for myself. Accepting that 100% participation is not required. I even had to ask for help with Bible study one night because I felt ill and overwhelmed.
I haven't gotten it all figured out--what I should say yes to and what it's okay to say no to. It's a daily, weekly struggle. When is it time to step back in order to rest and regroup and when is it time to seize the opportunity in front of me before it slips away? (Had I given in to feeling overwhelmed a few weeks ago, I never would have gotten the chance to meet Jennifer Rothschild and Stormie Omartian, to catch up with old friends at a book signing in Indiana, to see my grandparents again after probably seven years, to meet my niece and nephew on Mike's side of the family and hang out with my sweet sisters-in-law.)
There you have it, from my heart. I like to share all the fun and positive stuff on here, but if you are a reader because we share the adoption journey together, then here's one of those honest posts that lets you know some of the struggles in the journey, too.
(Sigh... I told David I just wanted to finish up this blog entry quickly before I went in to read with him tonight since I've been attempting to write it for a week now. I clicked save and just now found him sound asleep. Let. the. guilt. go...)
I want to be that mom whose kids' friends feel comfortable talking to and being around. I want to be fun-loving and welcoming and hospitable. I want to be active and involved, the cheerleader and the confidant. The nurturer and the guide. I want my kids to know they can always come to me. Talk to me. Confide in me. I haven't kept much of all that up, though. Lately, all I've been is the grouch, the distrusting one, the critique, and the control freak. My main focus seems to be keeping an eye on the calendar to make sure everybody gets fed adequately and has a way to get to their appointed place on time.
I don't know how (or why) parents do it when they have multiple kids in multiple activities. We do three things in our home: school, church, soccer. Plus Mike and I each have a favorite pastime. He likes to work on his truck projects. I like to focus on my writing. I've realized lately that we can't do it all and still maintain our values as a family. Time to reprioritize.
God. Family. School. Recreation. It's all important, but if it's not in order, it doesn't work.
I'm crazy about commitment--100% commitment. If we say we're going to do it, we're going to be there 100%. Now I see that as another one of those high expectations I put upon myself that I have to let go every now and then.
Two amazing camping weekends just for guys with the youth pastor appeared on the youth schedule at church. A time of fellowship and to teach them how to man up and be the young men that God called them to be. We had to choose between that or soccer games or school activities that they're already committed to. We agreed that the church events had to come first. That decision sends a message about what our family values most. We wanted to make sure they got the right message.
We've had our 15 year anniversary trip to Mexico planned since the fall when Madai set her wedding date for the same weekend as our anniversary. We made arrangements for the boys to stay with people and still make it to school. Then the soccer schedules were finalized and three games in three different places and times appeared for the same weekend. One that went till 10:00 at night on a school night. Even though we had friends volunteer to help with transportation for the boys, I felt like it was too much to ask, so we actually considered changing our plans and shortening our trip. That decision would send a loud message to our boys, though. A message that says that their activities come before our marriage. We can't do that. We knew we needed to stick to our original plans. God blessed our decision quickly by having another friend volunteer to take care of the night game transportation. So unexpected, which made me even more grateful.
The calendar is always full of activities. Some for school that we can't avoid. Choir concerts, family nights, informational meetings. Some for adoptive purposes, likewise, that we can't avoid. Post-adoption paperwork. Immigration appointments. Applying for and waiting on a social security card. Post-placement visits, dates, and reports to keep up with. Some for church that are necessary for spiritual growth, like guys' camping trips, ladies' Bible study, home groups, etc. Others are beneficial and good, but need to be chosen based on what else has already filled the calendar. I had to swallow the fact that I can't teach a ten week Bible study, have two boys in soccer, keep up with school activities in three different schools, and still be able to attend my monthly writer's group. I hate missing it, but I also hate feeling pulled in so many directions at once that I no longer feel a passion for any of them.
There's a writer's conference coming up at the end of the month right here in Fort Worth taught by my friend from writer's group, Mary DeMuth, specifically on self-publishing your book. I know it's exactly what I need at this time so I can make sure I take the right steps to publish my second book, (truly the guidance I've been looking for), but for now it's just a maybe, a possibility. I can't add another thing to the calendar at the moment.
So, in a nutshell, this is my biggest struggle as a new adoptive mother. Managing a schedule with a new one added. Prioritizing and remembering what message my choice of activities sends to my children. Letting go of the high expectations I set for myself. Accepting that 100% participation is not required. I even had to ask for help with Bible study one night because I felt ill and overwhelmed.
I haven't gotten it all figured out--what I should say yes to and what it's okay to say no to. It's a daily, weekly struggle. When is it time to step back in order to rest and regroup and when is it time to seize the opportunity in front of me before it slips away? (Had I given in to feeling overwhelmed a few weeks ago, I never would have gotten the chance to meet Jennifer Rothschild and Stormie Omartian, to catch up with old friends at a book signing in Indiana, to see my grandparents again after probably seven years, to meet my niece and nephew on Mike's side of the family and hang out with my sweet sisters-in-law.)
There you have it, from my heart. I like to share all the fun and positive stuff on here, but if you are a reader because we share the adoption journey together, then here's one of those honest posts that lets you know some of the struggles in the journey, too.
(Sigh... I told David I just wanted to finish up this blog entry quickly before I went in to read with him tonight since I've been attempting to write it for a week now. I clicked save and just now found him sound asleep. Let. the. guilt. go...)
