Dev Bentham's Blog, page 5

Happy Spring

The equinox has come and gone and it's officially spring in the northern hemisphere. Which is good to know as I look out my window at a still frozen lake. The trucks and ice huts are gone, though - a sure sign of spring in Northern Wisconsin.

This is the restless season up here in the cold, but a bit warmer these days, north. It's too warm to ski or ice fish and not yet warm enough to plant. We're on the cusp of mud season, but the ground is still too frozen to coat my boots.

Maybe that's why I've been writing hot weather stories lately. Writing about summer is a way to transport myself out of this in-between season and into the sun. I have two warm weather projects going right now. For one, I'm teaming up with the fabulous Clare London for a love story set on the Oregon Coast, which is never very warm but it's warmer than here. I'm very excited about this project. I love Clare's work and have always wanted to write with her.

My other steamy story is a murder mystery series set in Tanzania. The first book is almost done and I hope it'll come out in the Fall. I'm about to start the followup. Just thinking about that warm sun on my bare shoulders makes me smile. Too bad someone has to die.

Meanwhile I'll watch the snow and ice melt and click my heels three times in hopes that our short, sweet summer will arrive soon. 

Happy Spring! Dev

What do you like best about writing?

Someone asked me this recently and I thought it was an interesting question. The answer is different for everyone and for me, it changes all the time. My stock answer is that I love the moments when the story suddenly transforms. It always feels like magic when changing a few words makes a lifeless scene suddenly vibrant, or brings a character to life, or changes the tone of the whole story. And that happens during edits, so I usually think that editing is my favorite part.

On the other hand, there really is nothing like the feeling when the words are flowing and the story is writing itself. That's a rare event for me, but when it happens it's exhilarating. And that's a first draft thing. So maybe first drafts are my favorite part.

But then there's the moment when I type the end. That's sweet. And release day is exciting and so is holding a paperback copy of my book for the first time. And you know I love readings. 

What I liked about the question was that while there is no doubt that writing can be a lonely, frustrating and exhausting endeavor, focusing on what I like best about it makes me forget all that and feel grateful for all the parts I love. Which is true for everything, isn't it? If I think about the parts of my day job that I like, I don't get quite as irritated at the icky bits. Same with my relationships or the little town where I live.

If you've read my stories, you know that I spend a lot of time thinking about the hard stuff like grief, loss and anger. Mostly I love the promise of redemption at the end of those kinds of love stories. I'm not usually the "look on the sunny side of life" type. But I have to admit that focusing on the good parts is a way to love the work. And loving what I do makes life a lot easier.

I'd love to hear what you like about your work. We're all passionate about something, but sometimes the hard or frustrating or just plain boring parts get in the way. When that happens, what keeps you going?

Sidetracked

The lake is still covered in ice and the temperature this morning was under 10 degrees F but it's March so I'm thinking about spring. Which means I'm obsessing over my vegetable garden.

Here in Northern Wisconsin, the growing season is a short, fragile and precious thing. I can't plant tomatoes until June and the first frost comes in early September. Since I start buying seeds and making sketches in February, it's almost true that I plan for longer than I grow. It's two months yet before I'll get lettuce and spinach seeds in the ground, but I'm already up to my elbows in seed catalogs.

This, of course, has nothing to do with my book writing. Except it does. Because there's only so much time and if I'm gardening, I'm not writing. On the other hand, I can't think of a more pleasant way to spend an afternoon than digging in the dirt and dreaming up terrible scenarios for my poor characters. 

If I bought all my summer vegetables and spent those hours here at the typewriter, I might get another book a year out. But then again, I wouldn't spend those pleasant hours getting filthy and seeing the fruits of my labor sprout up on their own. 

Still, I should probably stop mooning over ingenious plant supports and heirloom seeds. There'll be time enough for that when spring actually comes. Any other northern gardeners out there wishing for a nice warm day so they can get to work?

Researching Delis

There are few things I love more than corned beef with a heavy dollop of mustard and horseradish. Which is probably why I spent way too much time drooling over pictures of sandwiches yesterday. I'm editing a manuscript I wrote quickly a few months ago. There's a scene where the guys share a deli sandwich (I know, could I get more sexy?). One of the guys is from New York, so of course, in his head he compares the sandwich to the best New York deli. When I first wrote the line it went something like "it didn't compare to xxx". 

Yesterday I had to give xxx a real name. When I'm writing about places, I vacillate between using real venues and making something up. Often I go for the entirely fictional to make sure I don't get anything wrong. For example, the town of Lacland in Nobody's Home exists only in our minds. And a lovely place it is.

But this time I decided to user the real thing so I googled best deli in New York. There's some controversy about which deli is best, but after reading the reviews and looking at the luscious l photos, I went for Katz's. It has a nice Jewish name and has been around a while, so I figure they have to know how to do pastrami. Do let me know if I'm wrong.

I'm not sure there's a point to this, other than to share some gorgeous food pictures and to let you know what I'm researching. Food. It's for the book, really. And it's making me hungry....

I think of food as seductive, so it probably ends up in my stories far too much. How about you? What's your go to date food? Or maybe you don't think food and sex go together. Ah, but just look at these figs - almost orgasmic all by themselves, don't you think?

Finding balance

Anyone else out there feeling overwhelmed?

Between work, events in my personal life, some writing deadlines and the need to spill out onto the street in protest periodically, I've been feeling seriously time-short lately. During the best of times I tend to ride the line between doable and chaos pretty hard. Obviously, these aren't the best of times.

 

 

Here's what I think I should do when things get to be too much:

Take a deep breathAssess what's really important and triageCalmly and methodically go through my tasks one by one until they're all finished.

Here's what I actually do:

PanicWhineRun around getting nothing done but making a lot of noise.

Of course, the big problem is finding a way to carve out both time and head space for creative work, which really is the most important stuff I do, even if it's often the first to go.

Maybe I should quit sleeping. 

How about you? What do you do when you're overwhelmed?

 

Except from Buyout - A Love Story (coming 2/8)

Here's the first scene in Buyout. I hope you enjoy it. 

Chapter ONE

I stood in the doorway and stared at the bodies writhing beneath stark white sheets. I’d forgotten a file at home and had come back unexpectedly. The two men didn’t hear me at first, and I had time to wonder how long this had been going on and what kind of fucking STDs and other germs Aiden had been bringing home. And how much it would cost to make him go away. We’d been together six months. In the beginning there had been candlelight and champagne and plenty of sex, and I’d thought I loved him. But now, as I watched him, I realized he’d already faded into the severance package category—beautiful young men with perfect bodies, who weren’t right and never could be.

I should have turned around and left right then, before they saw me. But I stood for a moment too long, and Aiden glanced over his shoulder. Color drained from his face. For two beats he stared at me with his mouth open.

Then came a stream of predictable words, apologies, excuses. It hurt almost as much to hear how stupid he thought I was as it did to see his skin tinged red with excitement from another man’s touch. I raised my hand to make him stop talking.

The room fell silent. The other guy, a slender, handsome man with dark glistening skin, edged himself out of bed. He picked up a pair of blue briefs. As he slid them over his perfectly defined thigh muscles, I wondered if he worked at the same modeling agency as Aiden.

It didn’t matter.

I turned back to the man who had gone from my lover to my ex in a fraction of a second. “I’m going to Amsterdam tonight. I’ll be back by the weekend. Will that give you enough time to find a new place?”

“Look, Sean, I’m sorry. I couldn’t help it. I’m weak. And look at him.” His eyes slid to the black man. He leaned toward me, and his voice dropped as he said, “We could share.”

Caught in the middle of our domestic ugliness, the poor guy was dressing quickly. His expression was shut down, like he’d rather be anywhere other than where he was right at that moment. I didn’t blame him. I felt the same. The last thing I wanted was to play out a big scene. The truth was that our affair had been over for weeks. I just hadn’t been paying enough attention to realize it.

I focused on my lover’s lover, the only relatively innocent person in the room. “Don’t be embarrassed. This isn’t your fault.”

“Fucking right it isn’t his fault,” Aiden snapped at me. “He’s not the one always taking off for Amsterdam or Hong Kong or some other fucking place, leaving me to entertain myself.”

“Which you seem very capable of doing.” I moved past him to the closet. I pulled out the suitcase I’d packed the night before. “I’ll get out of your way and let you get back to it.”

“Sean, wait.” He grabbed my arm. “Where will I go?”

I stared first at Aiden’s hand on my arm and then I met his gaze. I looked for it. I did. But the panic in his eyes had nothing to do with love. He stood there, naked. And to top it all off, I didn’t see any condoms around the bed or on his fucking cock.

I shook my head, disgusted. It really was time to offer the severance package. “Stay through the end of the month. I’ll find somewhere else to live in the meantime. And if you’re desperate, I’ll send over a check to cover first, last, and deposit on a new place.”

He relaxed, his hand dropping away from my arm. “Thanks Sean. You’re a real gentleman.”

I closed my eyes. I was thirty-six, relatively attractive, financially stable, healthy—with the exception of an occasional migraine—and alone. Again. It always hurt when my delusions got shattered. Until the next pretty man came along to make me want to believe. What would be next? An actor? A dancer? Whoever he was, he’d be delightful when I met him but not when he left.

I knew that paying their rent for a few months after they left was a defense mechanism. And an atonement. I was always making up for Martim, the man I’d abandoned years before. The one that got away. Except that he haunted my dreams, and his face always filled my mind when it was time to let the pretty boys go. Martim, who had been the best thing that ever happened to me, perfect until it all went wrong and I’d kicked him out on a cold night with no place to go. If I could take that back, I would. But all I could do was to pay off a stream of new, young, bad boys, even when they didn’t deserve it. None of them were Martim. And never would be.

It wasn’t until I was out in the hallway that I realized I’d left the damned file. Fuck it. It wasn’t worth going back in there. I’d just have to do without.

 

Find it at:

Dreamspinner Press

Amazon

Barnes and Noble

Kobo

Buyout - A Love Story .... coming 2/8

Buyout - A Love Story, is a sweet little novella set in Lisbon. It's all about redemption and second chances. Sean and Martim loved each other a long time ago. Turns out the more things change, the more they stay the same.

Everyone deserves a second chance. Or do they? Sean and Martim fell in love at Harvard. Things broke apart when Martim fell into a downward spiral of addiction after his father died. Sean kicked him out but has regretted it ever since. He’s never gotten over losing Martim. But then, not many aspects of his life have lived up to his collegiate dreams.

When he’s sent to evaluate Martim’s family hotel for foreclosure, Sean is once again in the position to put Martim out on the street. In the time since they parted, Martim has pulled himself together, although both health and financial problems linger as a result of his years as an addict. Can the two men bridge the gap of distance and time to rekindle their relationship, or will they fall apart again under the burdens of guilt and disease? 

Set in Lisbon, Portugal, this is the story of lovers reunited after more than a decade apart, and their second chance at romance.

The story comes out February 8th and available NOW for preorder on Dreamspinner, Amazon, B&N and Kobo.

I love Catt Ford's cover.

 

 

Love is a light, a beacon in the dark

Buyout is available for preorder!

I'm so excited to announce that my new novella, Buyout - A Love Story, will come out from Dreamspinner on Feb 8th. Catt Ford created this amazing cover. The story is available for preorder on Dreamspinner now.

Survive Anything Brownies

As we come into the new year - and it could be a very challenging new year at that - I thought I'd share my favorite serious chocolate, all grown-up, brownie recipe. The only sugar comes from the bittersweet chocolate and the semi-sweet chocolate. If you like your brownies sweeter, feel free to add some extra sugar. I like mine to have the tart taste of extra dark chocolate, but that's just me. With or without extra sugar, these are rich, bittersweet and perfect for serious chocoholics. 

Survive Anything Double-Chocolate brownies

Ingredients:

9 ounces bittersweet chocolate

7 Tbs unsalted butter

3 eggs

2 tsp vanilla extract

2 Tbs left over coffee

1/2 cup milk

1 cup sour cream

1.5 cups flour

1/2 tsp salt

1/2 tsp baking soda

1 bag (or more if you like) semi-sweet chocolate chips

Sugar (optional)

 

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. 

Melt bittersweet chocolate and butter in the microwave (about 2 minutes).  When it’s completely soupy set aside to cool.

Beat three eggs in a large bowl at medium-high speed until thick and pale. Add vanilla extract, coffee, milk and sour cream. Beat until fully mixed (just seconds). Reduce speed to low, add chocolate mixture. 

Whisk flour, baking powder and salt (and sugar if you must) together then fold the flour mixture in with the rest and add the chocolate chips.

Grease the sides of a 9 x 12 inch cake pan and line the bottom with parchment paper.  Cover with batter and smooth the surface with a spatula. Bake until cooked through, about a half hour (test with a toothpick to make sure). Allow brownies to cool before cutting.

Eat, share and repeat until everything’s okay.