Beth Alvarez's Blog, page 3

An Exercise in Frustration (Pt. 8)

This is an ongoing companion piece to be read after completing the Snakesblood Saga. Because it takes place during the final chapter of the last book, it will be very full of spoilers. It’s also unedited first draft fluff… just for fun! Read at your own risk, and expect installments no closer together than once a month.

* * * * *

Firal was used to forcing a smile when she wanted to scream. It drew across her face gracefully, as naturally as if it were genuine, and Lord Kaith offered a tense smile in return.

Rune was not so magnanimous, yet it was clear he tempered his response in how his shoulders tensed and his voice stayed calm. “Found us fast.”

“Didn’t find you,” Garam replied flatly. “Just followed.”

“Which explains why it took so long.” Rune glanced to the aged man’s cane and Firal bit the inside of her lip to keep her commentary to herself. He’d always been like that; needling when he oughtn’t, talking back when he should have stayed silent. How he managed to keep that mouth when dealing with generals, captains and kings escaped her, but she put a hand on his arm to still him, all the same.

“May I ask who requested us?” She kept the question light and sweet as she slid forward, silently positioning herself as the one to be addressed.

Garam noticed, for his eyes took a suspicious gleam, but he still answered. “King Vicamros. His guests have questions about the state of Ilmenhian trade, now that your capital no longer stands. Though I suppose you are the only representative present. You may be the only one who matters.”

A hint of a twitch flickered in the muscle of Rune’s cheek. Offended, was he? Well, perhaps that served him right after he’d spoken that way.

“Is it something we might be able to discuss later?” Firal asked, but Rune shook his head and pulled away from her touch.

He flicked dust from his sleeve and adjusted the collar of his coat, and whatever tension he’d carried before, it seeped from his frame to leave his stance both relaxed and confident. He’d always been good at pretending, and she envied his skill now. “The sooner we get it over with, the better.”

She was of a mind to agree, though on a far different subject. She shelved her disappointment and motioned for Garam to lead the way. “I suppose there’s no point in reminding the princess and her companions that there will be no further trade with Ilmenhith?”

“You’d think that much would be obvious, but they insist.” Lord Kaith gave his head the slightest of shakes. His cane scraped against the stone as he made for the doorway through which they’d only just escaped, its light harsh compared to the cool refuge of night. “I suspect they believe your country may be reestablished here. The king has already explained twice that refugees are to be settled as residents of Aldaanan, integrated into his holdings as citizens under his rule.”

“And is the difficulty of that conversation the primary reason the king sent you to retrieve us?” Firal arched a brow and offered a dry smile.

Garam chuckled. “The difficulty of that conversation makes me suspect he would have preferred to fetch you himself. But no. He sent me because when your husband needs to listen and obey, I’m always sent.”

An interesting tidbit. Firal kept her smile in place and glanced to Rune from the corner of her eye as they walked, but his expression told her nothing. She knew little of the friendships he had forged on the mainland, but his respect for Lord Kaith had been easy to see. That he did not share the same unwavering loyalty for the king he served was curious. “I cannot pretend to know Vicamros well, for all that we have been trade partners since his father held the throne. But it would seem unwillingness to displease allies makes his life more of a challenge than it needs to be.”

That yielded the faintest hint of motion, a downward shift of the corners of Rune’s mouth. A raw nerve, perhaps. She could not blame him. His return to Elenhiise had been demanded in her name, and Vicamros had delivered him without hesitation, in spite of all Rune had done for the Triad. Even as a hero, he had not been safe.

Perhaps the reason he was loyal to Garam and not Vicamros was no mystery at all.

“Well,” she added, as if it were an afterthought, “an unwillingness to displease some allies.” In the end, Rune had been the strongest she’d ever had.

His displeasure softened. “He does what he believes is best. I don’t always agree, but it doesn’t always turn out badly.”

“That’s the spirit,” Garam said. “Keep that attitude while you speak to Princess Meliel, and I’m sure everything will turn out fine.”

Firal repeated the name twice in her head to fix it in place, then picked up her skirts and shuffled ahead of their guide. “She is with the king now?”

He gave a nod. “She was when I left.”

Rune started past, as well, but Garam lifted his cane to delay him.

“Best behavior,” the older man prompted.

“I am not known for that.” Rune pushed the cane down with two fingers.

“I am aware,” Garam said, resigned.

Firal waited until Rune slipped by the barricade to rejoin her. She did not take his arm, though part of her wanted to; if the princess of Loriath wished to see her, she would appear independent and settle things swiftly. That he would receive the justification he sought for turning down another marriage was a useful side effect. She did not know which of the women clustered around King Vicamros was Princess Meliel, but she cut directly toward them with a smooth and gliding pace. The intention in her step kept them from being interrupted, and the king turned toward them with a hint of relief smoothing his brow.

“Ah, your ears must have been burning.” Vicamros injected a hint of humor into his voice, but his blue eyes begged for help. “We were just discussing you. I thought you might have left.”

“Certainly not. The night has just started, after all.” Firal hoped her smile was sincere; she’d been cordial with the king, if never good friends.

Rune settled close at her side, tucked just behind her shoulder, close enough she could feel his warmth. He plucked the lily she’d given him from behind his ear and added it to her curls. “My wife has a fondness for plants. She’s impressed by your gardens, Cam.”

The king’s interest perked. “Is she? You’ll have to speak with my wife, then. The gardens are something of a special project for her. I’m certain she’ll be pleased to tell you more about anything out there. Here, now. Meliel, you recall Lord Kaim-Ennen.”

As if that were a cue, most of the king’s audience began to slip away. All that remained was a dark-haired woman with a slender face, who gave Rune a perusal that was far closer and more lingering than Firal deemed fit. “Indeed I do. It would seem the years have been exceptionally kind to you.”

“Whatever kindness I’ve been dealt, I would sooner credit it to my wife.” Rune rested a hand against Firal’s shoulder, his grip gentle yet possessive.

Firal would have marveled any other time. How could he touch her that way in front of others, yet behave as if he feared her in private?

The king cleared his throat. “Ah, yes. Allow me to introduce the two of you. Firal, this is Princess Meliel of Loriath, heir to the throne of Loriath and overseer of trade relations. Meliel, this is Queen Firal of Elenhiise.”

A hard-edged smile curved Meliel’s lips. “Your crown persists, them, does it?”

“My kingdom has fallen in a most literal sense, but our people persist.” Firal faced the challenge with as much serenity as she could muster, though her annoyance had already flared. She lifted a hand to touch Rune’s fingers at her shoulder, knowing the affection would draw the woman’s eye—and possibly her ire. Had she been that eager to leverage a familial wedding to a hero of the Triad, then? No wonder Vicamros had tried to use Rune as a bargaining chip. It was enough to make Firal scoff, and she might have, if not for her sensibilities. Were she home, in her own palace, she might have shared her questions and thoughts. Here, in the Spiral Palace, she would do nothing to offend her host.

“Vicamros has been kind to grant our people permanent residence within the Triad. The people of Elenhiise are hard workers and will be an asset to his empire, no doubt.” Rune cast the king a sideways glance. “A good use for empty lands, as well. Aldaanan has been left untended for some time.”

“Since the departure of the gryphons.” Vicamros nodded. “It’s a difficult region, but if the people of Elenhiise show anywhere near the tenacity of its leaders, I am sure they will thrive.”

Meliel’s speculative eye turned back to Rune. “We were given the impression you were not interested in a role of authority, Lord Kaim-Ennen. What persuaded you to reevaluate that decision?”

Rune answered with a smirk. “You assume my position has changed.”

“Has it not?” She gestured toward Firal with an open hand. “Or was it that I misunderstood, and your aim was higher than I believed?”

“I’m afraid your assumptions continue to miss.” His fingers twined with Firal’s and his smirk endured, so petty that even Firal felt herself rubbed the wrong way.

The princess faltered and uncertainty showed through. “But you have married.”

Firal slid smoothly into the crack. “Rune has always been fond of a more hands-on form of leadership, which is why he served as a general in Elenhiise.” Whose general he had been hardly mattered, nor would someone from as far away as Loriath have any way to learn. “I understand he has filled similar military roles here in the Triad, serving beneath Lord Kaith. But I apologize, it seems our status was not made clear. We have been married over six pents now. Our union was formed while my father still ruled.”

Rune squeezed her fingers, ever so gently.

“Six pents?” Meliel repeated, startled.

“Inexplicably, I haven’t frightened her off yet.” Rune’s other hand drifted to Firal’s lower back, the touch both tender and reassuring.

She leaned into it and savored the warmth. “Well, one needs proper challenges to reach their full potential. Without exercises, one can never learn to deal with frustration.” No one had ever tested her more. “But I’m sure you have your own experiences with that. Vicamros said you are in charge of Loriath’s trade arrangements. I suppose it’s fortuitous that you’ve come to strike a trade alliance now, as that will allow you an early chance at benefiting from the new productivity the Triad will see, what with the new settlement of Aldaanan.”

“Perhaps.” Meliel gave no more than a single glance at Rune. The message had been received and she was moving on. Good. “However, I was more interested in what will happen with your kingdom’s trade. Your island was uniquely positioned as a trade hub, but now it is gone. While our bonds with the Triad are growing, I suspect Loriath would also benefit from making friendly trade ties in the south. Who will be facilitating trade between the northern and southern continents?”

“That would be us,” a new voice interjected, and the whole group turned.

Firal had never imagined she might be so glad to see one of her husband’s former lovers.

Free printable reading journal and other goodies to come

Earlier this month, I mentioned that I’d made myself a printable reading journal. It’s been great for keeping track of what’s on my shelf and writing down quick thoughts on the things I’ve read. I thought others might like it, but while I’ve played with the idea of selling printable journals and planners, it didn’t feel right for this one.
Instead, the journal becomes the kickoff for a special archive I’ve been putting together for my newsletter subscribers, and it’s the first of several goodies that are already on the page. It turned out pretty nicely, too, if I do say so myself! It’s optimized for printing on an 8.5×5.5 page, so half a standard piece of printer paper.

So that’s the first thing that went up on the page, and once I had it up, thinking of all the other things I can add to the special bonus content archive made me excited. Throughout the coming year, I plan to add goodies like printable bookmarks, book-themed stickers, and phone wallpapers.

It’s also a perfect place to create a full list of the novellas and short stories newsletter subscribers can download for free, so they can be easily accessed at any time. Right now, the list includes A Clean Getaway and The City of Arches, two companion stories for the Snakesblood Saga, as well as The Choosing, a short story prequel to Spectrum Legacy.

But now that my paranormal romance stories are no longer available for sale, newsletter readers have the chance to get those, too! Both After Undeath books (Death of the Sun and Born of the Moon), two Keeper’s Kin novellas (Keeper’s Finder and The First Hunt), and all three Keeper’s Kin novels (Her Midnight Cowboy, Her Midnight Wedding, and Her Midnight Hunter) are available as part of the archive.

I’ll be sending the link to the archive and the password that goes with it to newsletter subscribers later this week, so you have time to sign up! And if you’re already signed up, you’ll be getting that email soon.

Why newsletter subscribers and not blog readers?

The newsletter is separate from blog updates. It only goes out once a month, so it’s less overwhelming for some readers than receiving weekly or bi-weekly updates whenever I post something here. The newsletter is also where I share sneak previews of cover art, first looks at short stories, and share notifications whenever my books go on sale. That sort of thing is more time-sensitive, after all! By sharing the archive of goodies with newsletter subscribers, it gives me an easy way to keep track of all the extras I’ve offered them over the years and ensure that new subscribers have a chance to get them, too. Just a special thanks for being there through all my writing adventures.

Visit the newsletter sign-up page and you’ll get an extra novella when you join, too–Of Blood and Rain is a stand-alone fantasy adventure and will be sent to you right away, and then the password for the bonus archive will be coming soon–along with a convenient link and a reminder of the password every month, so none of your perks get lost.

Happy reading!

Looking ahead

It’s weird to be back at this spot, a year later–looking at what I’ve accomplished, what’s left to do, and what the year ahead contains. Last year, I set the goal of writing 4 books and publishing 3 of them. Now that Paragon of Shadow is out there in the world, I’ve sort of met part of that goal. I got 3 books finished and 3 published, but that book number 4 I planned to write has ended up being the final book for Spectrum Legacy, and it’s not going to be done by the end of this year.

That’s all right; I made my peace with that early on, when I had a couple unexpected family emergencies crop up and Paragon of Shadow ended up running long. In order to give those things the time and attention they needed, something had to be pushed back, and the best choice was letting Spectrum #6 slip to the back burner for an extra month. But now that I’m writing it and looking at the calendar, everything ahead is a little… fuzzy.

A few things will change in 2025, I think. I’ll be finishing the last Spectrum Legacy book and getting it published in the first half of the year, but after that? Well, it’s hard to say. After that point, there are 3 directions I can go with my writing, and I think all of them will be slower.

For the past 5 years, I’ve prioritized writing above everything else I do, and while it’s been amazing for letting me get my stories out into the world, that means things got a little unbalanced. After all, the more time I spend writing the books, the less time I spend letting people know about the books, and the lack of solid marketing has really shown in how slow Spectrum Legacy has been to take off. I’ve spoken before about the challenges of continuing a series like Spectrum Legacy when readers are hesitant to pick it up, being that it’s unfinished. But I’ve invested a lot into it, after all, and it deserves to be seen.

So we shift. If people aren’t reading, it means people aren’t seeing, because if I can be a little egotistical for a second, these are really fun books. Fun to write, fun to read, fun to see the emotional reactions they pull from my family in real time. And they’re good, too–I know they have to be good from a quality perspective, or else a panel of literary award judges wouldn’t have chosen book 1 as a finalist and book 3 as a winner in their respective years. (Book 2 was released outside the nomination window, and book 4 wasn’t nominated because The Witch and the Wyrm made it onto the list in the same category. I’m fine with that; I don’t care to compete against myself.)

In the past, I’ve spent 80% of my “book time” writing and 20% of it talking about the books and doing the admin work that comes with publishing. In 2025, the biggest shift will be flipping that. 20% of my time spent writing and 80% spent on marketing efforts. After Spectrum Legacy is finished, of course. My first goal is still getting that book into your hands. But then I’ll be at a strange point where I don’t have an open, ongoing series. The first time that will have happened in… I don’t know, 15-20 years. Wild.

There are a few directions I can go after Spectrum Legacy is done.
Route 1 is writing Snakesong Serenade, the spin-off from Snakesblood Saga that’s been hanging in the back of my mind for the past two decades.
Route 2 is a story for Tahl, which has also been hanging out in my head for years, but it’s a lot more niche and unlikely to be successful.
And then route 3 is starting a new fantasy romance series, which seems like the best decision so far.

There’s also the possibility of adding a few more standalones to Artisan Magic, but I’m short on ideas for that and I’d like to try something fresh, so I think the above-mentioned route 3 is the best plan of action right now, and that would be my second book release for 2025.

Two books in a year feels really slow after the rate I’ve been going for the past few years, but it’s also the most reasonable, considering I’ll need a lot more time to finish it, having so much less writing time open to me. But it also presents the best opportunity for growth, and I definitely look forward to that.

Maintenance time

Right when I was ready to sit down and dive into another month of focusing on writing, I opened up my website to post about it and discovered several posts I’d had scheduled to go out while we were traveling had failed to post. Rudely enough, it failed to send me a notification, or I would have discovered the issue earlier. That’s always a risk with technology; all it takes is one automatic update when you’re away from home and can’t supervise it, and suddenly nothing works right anymore.

One troublesome side effect of this is that as I fix things and the posts start going out, now much later than they should have been, the site will be sending repeated notifications to people. I hate that sort of annoyance in my inbox and I cringe to think of others dealing with it, but there’s not much I can do.

It does mean it’s time for a maintenance week, though, which is annoying because it takes away from my writing time. I’m in the process of restructuring a lot of my site’s back end, streamlining how it uses images and correcting issues that kept it from notifying me that something was amiss, and hopefully the end result will be something that works a little more like it’s supposed to. Being able to schedule things (like the chapters for Exercise in Frustration) lets me keep updates rolling out at a steady pace instead of dumping them all at once like it’s done this week.

But while I’m babysitting files, it’s a lot of time at my PC. I usually do all my writing from my laptop, at a different desk, because that desk doesn’t cause as much back/shoulder pain. It’s not large enough for a full desktop setup, so it’s not like I can switch, and that means my PC doesn’t get used as often.
It is, however, the machine I use for making a lot of graphics and things–and one of the things I made is a printable reading journal. I made it for myself, because I wanted one but couldn’t find one I liked that didn’t cost a small fortune, and when we come out the other side of maintenance, I’ll have a shiny new section of the site where newsletter subscribers to get their own copy of that reading journal… as well as a few extra thank-you bonuses. I just need a little more time to get it set up right now.

So, in short, sorry for the deluge of apparent updates as overdue posts go live this week, and there will be a treat to make up for it soon!

Just as soon as I get all the rest of this fixing sorted out.

An Exercise in Frustration (Pt. 7)

This is an ongoing companion piece to be read after completing the Snakesblood Saga. Because it takes place during the final chapter of the last book, it will be very full of spoilers. It’s also unedited first draft fluff… just for fun! Read at your own risk, and expect installments no closer together than once a month.

* * * * *

“I’ve tried not to bring it up. I know it’s uncomfortable. I find it uncomfortable.” There was no preamble to soften the harshness of the subject; it was easier that way. Rune had spent enough time avoiding questions. He simply needed to know. To understand, and to temper his expectations. He held them now, mindful that they not stir his temper or any other feelings. “But we’ve never discussed moving on. What led to it. What made you decide I wasn’t coming back.”

For a long time, he’d assumed it was anger that kept them apart. He knew better now, but it hadn’t brought him ease. Whether or not she’d been angry didn’t matter. Things had still ended with the two of them separated.

With her choosing to make a life with someone else.

To his surprise, Firal sighed, her expression one of relief instead of the dismay he’d expected. “You made that sound as if it would be far worse.”

What else had she imagined he might ask? He couldn’t fathom. “I can ask something worse, if you’d prefer.” He had plenty of those sort of questions, too, but starting simply was important. If they were to build anything of substance, they needed a foundation, and setting reasonable expectations was the most logical first brick.

Whether he could build with the answer she gave him, he did not know.

“We’ll start with the easy things.” She tried to smile, but it was false and fleeting, and she paced beyond him to meander down the garden path. “I didn’t give up easily, if that’s what you’re asking.”

He hadn’t meant to make any such accusation. “Even if you had, there would have been a reason for it.”

Firal shrugged. Maybe it made no difference to her. Yet she did not continue with her answer for some time.

He followed a few paces behind her while she thought, his hands clasped behind his back. He was not a patient person, but his teachers had done a thorough job of hammering diplomacy into him, and it was a skill that helped now.

Eventually, she stopped beside one of the patches of sword lilies. They were a cheerful splash of color, even in the night, though their blooms were the last of the season and not as bold as the early flowers. She touched the stem and tilted it to let her see the lilies better. “It was… for Lulu. If I am to be honest. It was a difficult decision, and one that went against everything I desired. But what I what I wanted with you, I was encouraged to find elsewhere. Or, rather, with Vahn, specifically. We married right away for her safety, but it wasn’t… that is, I don’t think we saw it as anything other than a political arrangement for a long time.”

Rune offered a slight nod as confirmation he was listening, though he gazed at her without really seeing. He had already known the reasons for their marriage. That was not why he asked. “And when you decided it was more than political?”

She lowered her hand. “That was something I learned over the course of many years.”

Duty. Not abandonment. Not even a desire to let go. It soothed as well as any healing balm she’d ever given him. He shut his eyes.

Firal turned and gave him no reprieve. “And you? What drove you to look elsewhere?”

He should have anticipated that. The question still made him flinch, but she was forthcoming; he should be, too. “Alcohol.”

One fine brow arched, though the rest of her expression remained unimpressed. “Then perhaps you should quit drinking.”

“Probably.” He’d recognized that failing in himself long ago. There simply hadn’t seemed to be a point to addressing it before the last few months, and in those months, he’d found it harder to let go than he’d anticipated. But she was right. He’d downed liquor earlier to dull the edges of unpleasantness that royal events held, yet even that dullness agreed with her. “I tend to make bad decisions when I drink.”

She stepped closer with a white lily in her hand. “And is this a bad decision?” Her tone was light, almost teasing, as she lifted the flower to tuck it behind his ear.

“No.” That answer came easy—as easy as raising his arm and letting his hand find her face. Her skin was soft beneath his fingertips, unlike anything he’d ever known. “This is the best decision I’ve made in a long time.”

A ghost of a smile brushed her lips and she tilted her face upward beneath his touch.

It be easy. The thought weighed so heavy on his mind that it was a wonder he could think at all. Yet for a moment, there were no thoughts, just his eyes settling on the inviting fullness of her lips and the innate concept of all that might follow. It stirred his pulse and a blossoming warmth in his chest, awakening cravings left dormant in his travels but always present, a seed of longing he’d carried his whole life. To be known—accepted—without doubt, without question. Something she had offered years ago, something he’d missed and wanted back with every ounce of fire in his soul.

She leaned closer, her eyes half-lidded, and the movement slid his thumb to the corner of her mouth.

His attention slipped to it, to the creases in the back of the joint and the rough edge of his nail, and the wave of uncertainty that followed was wholly unexpected.

This was what he wanted.

What he’d fought for.

What was meant to solve everything.

Yet having it now, touching her skin, seeing in stark contrast all the ways he’d fallen short—

Rune lowered his eyes and turned his face away. He almost withdrew his hand, but Firal lifted hers to catch it and hold his fingers in her grasp.

The gesture brought no relief, but he let his hand curl until his fingertips brushed her polished nails.

“I guess you like this version of me better.” He wasn’t sure why he said it. The alcohol, maybe—another poor decision to add to his ever-growing list.

Yet inexplicably, color rose in her cheeks and while she squeezed his hand, it felt more like nervousness than eagerness.

“It’s… an adjustment,” she said. She did not meet his eyes. “I’ll get used to it, I’m sure.”

“You’re allowed to say it. I know I was never…” The rest of what he meant to say escaped him, his thoughts a little too loose. Thinned out, like the moving clouds that veiled parts of the night sky.

The blush in her cheeks only intensified.

Rune studied her with a growing frown. “You do like it.” It almost wasn’t a question. He could see no alternative.

In spite of it, she pulled away and gripped her skirts, red to the tips of her ears. “Is it so terrible to think I could find the man I married handsome?”

Terrible wasn’t on the list of words that crossed his mind.

Then again, the list was sparse, and he faltered a moment, struggling to get even one of them to reach his lips. “I—that—”

Of all the things she could have said, he never would have imagined that.

That the one thing he’d allowed to keep him away, that he’d convinced himself was all that stood between him and the life he wanted, had never been any obstacle at all.

That in spite of everything he was and had been, it was enough.

It always had been.

Firal looked as if she had something more to say, but when she looked back to him, she froze.

A second later, a rough, familiar clearing of the throat demanded attention, and Rune turned.

Behind him, Garam stood with a stern expression and his arms crossed. “Your presence has been requested.” The former captain’s eyes flicked to Firal. “Both of you.”

Paragon of Shadow, Book 5 of Spectrum Legacy, is Now Available

Today’s the day! Book 5 of Spectrum Legacy, Paragon of Shadow, is now available!

You can get the ebook version on Amazon now, both to buy and to read in Kindle Unlimited.

Paperback editions are also available through Amazon and other book retailers, and my personal stock for my signed book shop is on the way, so those will be available through my site’s shop in the next few days.

I really hope you love this book as much as I do now that it’s finally done!

Writing on the final book in the series begins later this month, and it’s good to know the ending is in sight after all these years of working on this series.

At some point in 2025, Spectrum Legacy will draw to an end, but I’m not going to rush it–after coming this far, it’s important to make sure the book is just right, so I’ll be taking my time to ensure I can craft the best ending possible.

Happy reading, and see you soon!

Art Break

One of my goals for this year was to spend more time drawing. A sketch a week, and a drawing every month. There were no rules for what the drawing had to be, just a finished piece of art. It could be line art or a painting, flat colors or fully rendered, as long as I completed something.

I’ve posted some of the pieces I completed on Instagram, but haven’t really had a dedicated place that I shared any of the year’s fruits.

One of the first pieces I did was needed for publication of Paragon of Light, and it’s the chapter header graphic found inside the book. It was fun to go back to painting with gouache, and I hope I can find more chances to do illustrations with gouache paints. I’ve considered doing some little designs for stickers or something, just for fun, and I think gouache would be a good outlet for it.

I’ve enjoyed the chapter header graphics a lot, and my illustration for September was another one, meant for Paragon of Shadow. The purple crystal they found in the very first book makes a return as an object of importance, so the Shadowsliver is the chapter header for book 5. I suppose that leaves me with the Spectrum Blade itself to paint for book 6, although I’m unsure how to make it look good for print! I have lots of pearlescent and metallic gouache colors that look amazing in person and would work so well for it, but they don’t translate to black and white well at all. So far, all the paintings I’ve done have been matte colors.

Not all my illustrations this year have been winners, though, so a lot of them haven’t been posted. I spent a lot of time playing with different art styles, as well as different coloring styles, while I work to find where I fit in the world of art now. When I sketch, I find I often favor a manga style, which is something I drew a lot when I was younger. It’s been fun to go back to it, but I’ve tried more western styles, too, like the below illustration of Adelinde and Aldram I did for The Witch and the Wyrm.

Originally, there was going to be no shading on that piece at all, but I found the flats were a little too flat, so I added some blush and a hint of shading to the skin. Otherwise, the bottle was all that got shading. It was fun, and relatively easy, but I don’t think it’s the direction I ultimately wish to take my art.

After that, I tried a few other lineart styles, but I eventually went back to digital painting. I’d done a portrait of Firal from The Snakesblood Saga earlier in the year and figured it would be nice to do a matching one for Rune.

The problem was, I didn’t use the same methods twice, since I was still learning to use my iPad for art when I did the drawing for Firal, and I adopted a looser sort of style for the portrait of Rune. It was still fun, but ultimately they don’t match as much as I thought they would when I started!

It’s been a fun project overall, and I think it’s one I’ll continue into 2025, even though not all the pieces are worth sharing. I might do some kind of compilation when the whole year is done, but for now, I have to figure out what my last two drawings of the year might be.

What comes afterNaNoWriMo?

When you read that question, your initial thought might be “editing,” since that’s what we typically do after completing a manuscript, and completing a manuscript in November is the whole point of NaNoWriMo.

But this time, I mean the question on a bigger scale. What will people do as they abandon what appears to be a sinking ship?

At this point, it’s no secret that as an organization, NaNoWriMo has had a few blunders. Both this year and last, some poorly-managed situations, statements, and stances have led to a considerable shrinkage of participating authors, and as they depart, donations to the organization shrink. 2022 was already a fiscal loss of six figures for the non-profit, and while the years before that have been up and down, the organization’s recent statements supporting already-controversial usage of generative AI in novel writing have resulted in a number of sponsors withdrawing support, and the trouble has been covered by news outlets like Wired and Washington Post.

I have my own thoughts on their choices and stances, and admit a measure of discomfort with AI being where the line is drawn, rather than issues that came to light in 2023, but those thoughts and feelings are not relevant to the original question, so I’ll get back to it.

Authors are abandoning the organization. A lot of them will be going elsewhere, but where?

A quick Google search for “NaNoWriMo alternatives” produces a near-endless list of new groups, start-ups, non-profits, game apps, and more, all seeking to be the “hot new thing” for writers seeking a new digital headquarters. At first, I wrote down some that looked promising, but the longer I looked, the more I became overwhelmed with the abundance of choices, and what was actually going to happen in the wake of people leaving NaNoWriMo became pretty clear.

Once you get past all the bells and whistles of the website–things that didn’t exist when I first participated, back when I was sixteen–the whole concept of NaNoWriMo is just a simple, organized challenge: Write 50,000 words in one month. The original concept, developed by Chris Baty, was something he did with his friends. Likely for accountability, as having someone to check in with can be highly motivating, and that’s part of what helped NaNo become so successful to begin with. A community grew around it, and the website grew as the community did.

Community is what remains, and as people slip away from the organization, the end result is they’ll find it elsewhere.

Small groups of writers will pull together in other places. There’s no shortage of sites ready to scoop them up, but most of them seem to be filtering into private spaces; I’ve already been invited to half a dozen independent novel writing group chats and Discord servers this month, and I’ve seen friends setting up their own spreadsheets and moving to word count trackers like Pacemaker instead of relying on NaNoWriMo’s official word count tracker. And really, there’s a big benefit to this. It gives groups the freedom to pursue group writing challenges at any time of year, letting them plan around their lives and activities and work it in where it fits. In the end, I believe being able to tailor a challenge to small groups will do a far better job of helping people grow closer as friends and writers, building and improving that sense of community that everyone is looking for.

As for me, I won’t be participating this year. I’ll be writing in November, of course, getting started on the last book in my epic fantasy series Spectrum Legacy, but it’ll be my normal pace and my normal schedule, and I probably won’t be checking in with people beyond my usual status updates when I’m writing. But NaNo was also never that special to me, so I don’t feel that much sense of loss knowing I won’t be participating this year, or participating in the website’s official event in the future. I almost always did the challenge alone or alongside friends I already knew. I never met anyone because of the organization or the challenge. Pacemaker is a better word tracker anyway, and is open all year; I lose nothing by logging out of my NaNo account and never going back.

But it is sort of sad, in a way. Baty’s first 50k-in-a-month push was in 1999, meaning 2024 is the event’s 25th year–although NaNoWriMo as a non-profit organization has only existed since 2006. 25 years should have been the event’s silver anniversary.

Instead, we’re breaking up.

An Exercise in Frustration (Pt. 6)

This is an ongoing companion piece to be read after completing the Snakesblood Saga. Because it takes place during the final chapter of the last book, it will be very full of spoilers. It’s also unedited first draft fluff… just for fun! Read at your own risk, and expect installments no closer together than once a month.

* * * * *

The head librarian introduced Firal to half a dozen members of her staff before they tried to recruit her as part of their historical society. To her surprise—and relief—the councilor tutted and shook his head to discourage their pressing. It was too soon, he said, too close on the heels of a half-finished project that benefited the whole of the Triad.

“Besides,” Councilor Parthanus added once the others gave their reluctant nods, “once the newcomers are settled, it will be easier for her to bring people of note to the library for direct interview.”

A few thoughtful hums answered.

Firal could not help but raise her brows. She hardly knew which refugees would be considered ‘people of note’ or who they might wish to speak with. Tobias was a first thought, as was Minna, but if she took Minna to the capital to speak with the librarians, who would there be to look after Lulu?

Her father, of course. She mentally scolded herself for being so slow to consider it. She had never known what to expect of him as a parent, but he was certainly not uninterested. His approach with Lulu had been gentle and welcoming, without showing any eagerness to replace the father she’d lost, who she sometimes asked after or cried for. Firal appreciated his involvement and the girl had been fast to take a liking to him, though that was hardly a surprise. Rune had always gotten along with children. Those in Core had always welcomed his presence, in spite of things that should have made him frightful.

The councilor cleared his throat and Firal blinked twice to refocus her attention.

“Will that suffice, my lady?” Councilor Parthanus smiled, but his tone was gently urging, as if he’d repeated himself. He likely had.

“Forgive me, I was just trying to determine where such interviews might fit. I trust you will want me to be present, and not simply recruit others for the purpose.” She smiled back and regretted that she’d been roped into such a conversation at all, even if the librarians all seemed eager to work with her. It was not that she didn’t appreciate it; having a place where she felt valuable and welcome was important. While she had not yet come to long for it, she knew she would. Yet she had never liked being pressed to make decisions on a whim. Those choices were always the ones that haunted her, whether they were for better or for worse.

“Your presence would be paramount,” the head librarian—a woman whose name Firal had already forgotten—said with an eager light in her eyes. “I can think of no one better to add context to their information than the woman who led them.”

Firal did not agree, though she appreciated the flattery. She could think of a hundred other people better suited to the task of embellishing and interpreting—all she had ever done was sit and rule, something that separated her from both the people she looked after and the things they experienced. How much more of her own country’s culture and history might she have experienced if she’d been in out there, living like everyone else?

Before she could think of a diplomatic dismissal, something shifted in the faces of both the councilor and the librarians. Amusement, surprise. Nervousness. She tensed but a breath before hands slid over her eyes from behind.

“Guess who,” came familiar whispered words beside her ear.

Goosebumps prickled up the back of her neck and she fought back a shiver as she touched his fingers, so soft and smooth and ordinary that she marveled. “Daemon,” she murmured.

His chuckle warmed her heart as he peeled his hands away and turned her to face him. “No one has called me that in a very long time.”

That he spoke to her in their mother tongue raised more than one eyebrow, and the small group of people she’d been with shuffled about as if to pretend they did not eavesdrop. All the same, she caught a gleam of interest in the councilor’s eye as Rune drew her away from their audience and toward the open ballroom floor where other couples swirled.

“I have other things I might call you,” Firal suggested. “Where have you been?”

“Avoiding responsibilities.” He did not even flinch. “I appreciate your assistance in escaping them.” His hand settled on her waist and his eyes latched onto the diadem pinned to her hair.

Firal followed his steps far more easily than the first time they’d danced and wondered at how her grace was not the only thing that had so radically changed. “Thank you.”

The gratitude startled him and his gaze snapped to hers before he realized she meant it for the jewels. Then he grew more serious, a shade more guarded, and gave an indifferent shrug. “You’re royalty. You should look the part. People will have expectations.”

Which was not why he had selected something for her. No matter what he claimed, she knew he had always cared about appearances and what others thought—it was half of what had drawn them together in the first place. But that he dismissed it so readily as simple necessity that she knew there was more to it.

He wanted her to have it.

He regretted that she did not have more.

He just wouldn’t say it.

“I don’t care about their expectations,” she said. “As long as I meet yours.”

Rune almost made a wrong step. His recovery was rough. “Sorry. I haven’t done this since…”

There was no need to explain.

“I suppose you’ll have to relearn, now that you have new feet.” She smiled as he twirled her and for a moment, she closed her eyes and envisioned the ballroom in Ilmenhith, where they first danced. The floor had been far more crowded then, full of magelings and young soldiers indulging in the rare sharing of a celebration.

“I wouldn’t call them new, but I will say you should open your eyes. You’re putting far too much trust in my ability to get this right.” In spite of the teasing, his next steps were sure, and he spiraled her close in his arms.

“Sorry.” She smiled as he gave her a squeeze and then released her again. When she did open her eyes, it was to take a proper look at him. He’d dressed in midnight blue—a color that matched her dress, now that she saw them together—and his coat was a distinctively Ilmenhian cut, with silver embroidery on the collar and sleeves. It suited him, and it suited the life he’d had before, for all that it was different from how he’d presented himself then. “I was just remembering the solstice ball. Do you recall it?”

“I could never forget.” A hint of a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth, soft and almost sheepish. “I was in love with you then, too.”

It was only then that it struck her how rarely he’d used such words. She’d heard them when he’d first confessed his feelings and again when he had promised his feelings remained, but in the months they’d been together, it had been his actions that showed it, not words.

Honeyed words had rolled so easily off Vahn’s tongue.

The thought of him sent a pang of sadness through her heart and she tried to scour the thoughts away.

There was no competition between the two men. Had Vahn lived, there likely still would not have been. He had sown betrayal and harvested the reward, but even knowing he had severed those ties himself, she still grieved. Grieved his loss, and the loss of what she had believed had bloomed between them.

Now was not a time for grief.

She made herself smile. “It was your birthday, wasn’t it? The ball?”

“Near enough to it,” Rune replied. “The disadvantage of being born near important holidays is that the day is often overshadowed.” He twirled her under his arm and her skirts swished wide and then wrapped around her legs.

She spun the other way to unwrap them. “Considering you never told me when it was, I assumed it didn’t matter much to you.”

“It mattered when I was young. Once I was older, I think I mostly despised it. Existing hasn’t always been the happiest experience for me.”

Something for which she could not blame him. There were those to whom life was needlessly cruel; he had suffered more than most.

Firal mustered a playful smile. “I suppose I’ll just have to ensure the next one is noteworthy enough that the solstice won’t overshadow it.”

He almost smiled back. “I don’t think anything could overshadow you.”

Inexplicably, given her age and the relationship they were supposed to have, warmth bloomed in her cheeks.

She wasn’t used to that sort of sweetness, not from him. Yet her shy delight was short-lived, for the next moment she looked at him, he gazed past her and his guard was up.

Firal turned her head to see what had changed his disposition so swiftly. Across the room, the king walked with a pack of foreign dignitaries by his side. People Rune wanted to avoid, no doubt. She stared, taking in their faces and committing them to memory, lest she be ambushed with trite pleasantries and prying words later. Then she returned her attention to him and did her best to be coy. “Would I be remiss to suggest the two of us take a walk in the garden?”

He was visibly relieved. “You would not. In fact, I think that’s exactly what we should do.”

Their dance stilled and he offered his arm. She took it gladly and leaned against him, her heart strangely aflutter as he led the way.

A romantic dance. A moment alone. And, as much as she hated to acknowledge it, a shot or two of alcohol in his belly to loosen a tongue she’d come to find too restrained.

Perhaps now was the time. A chance to fix the awkward distance that had formed between them. To break down the barriers and suggest something more.

Her pulse had started drumming by the time they stepped from the Spiral Palace and into its lush gardens, a space lit by glowing lanterns and all but empty, what with the festivities inside.

They had not gone far on the path before Rune laid a hand atop hers, squeezing her fingers to his upper arm, and broke the silence that hung tense between them. “I apologize if this is forward, but there’s something I’ve been meaning to… not ask, but speak with you about.”

Firal’s nerves leaped, but she put on her best smile and fought the butterflies in her stomach with an iron fist. “Yes?”

Rune grew still on the path, and the shadow that darkened his eyes made her wish she hadn’t asked.

Cover Reveal: Paragon of Shadow, Spectrum Legacy Book 5

Book 4 left off in a rough spot. I know. I’m sorry. I’ll never get over the way my child looked at me when she reached the last page and saw where it ended. The sheer betrayal was almost too much for me to handle.

But book 5 is on its way, and the end of the series is now in sight: Paragon of Shadow is coming November 19!

Keep scrolling to see the gorgeous cover and get a taste of what’s to come… but stop here if you’re worried about spoilers for the series.

The Bladebearer has fallen.
And with him, so has the capital. Now, without the power of the legendary blade or the hand meant to wield it, Lark is forced to take charge of the crumbling kingdom and leave her captured friend behind. With Amroch’s armies scattered and her magic yet to awaken, her only hope is to earn the right to wield the Spectrum Blade and become the new Bladebearer herself.

Trapped at the enemy’s mercy, Zaide fights to survive, knowing there is no chance of rescue while Gadranus holds Amrochan. His place inside enemy lines grants him the ability to help his people from within, an arrangement that offers more risks than relief… until the offer is made.

If Zaide gives up the fight and joins the enemy, the power he’s entrusted with could be the secret to saving everyone he holds dear. But any misstep could prove fatal, and as the shadowy forces that tempt his soul grow, the line he walks grows thinner by the moment.

You can preorder Paragon of Shadow for Amazon Kindle now.

Paperbacks will be available on the 19th as well, and signed copies will be up in my shop about a week after the book comes out.

Thank you so much for supporting my work as the series has come this far.  The final book in the series is underway!