Debra Landwehr Engle's Blog, page 2

The Year the Turkey Refused to Cook

A few years ago, it was my turn to fix Thanksgiving dinner for the family. We had 15 people coming, so we’d cleaned the house, set the table and put out snacks for appetizers.

Photo courtesy of pixabay.com

There was just one little detail I forgot: to allow enough time for the turkey to thaw before putting it in the oven.

I’d transferred it from the freezer to the refrigerator two days before, not realizing it probably needed four.

With Bob’s help, I did all the things you’re supposed to do in a pinch. We immersed the bird in a bath, and we let it sit in the sink with water running over it. Short of taking it to a tanning booth, we did everything we could to speed up the defrosting.

But when I put it in the oven, it was still an iceberg on the inside.

Oh, well, I thought….we’ll turn up the heat, set out some more chips and play some more card games. It’ll all turn out okay.

Well, not so much.

We were supposed to eat at 6 p.m., but when we inserted the thermometer in the turkey, we could feel ice crystals where the tender roasted meat was supposed to be.

At 7:00, it still wasn’t safe to eat.

At 8:00, my niece and her young family started gathering up their things to leave, since it was close to the kids’ bedtime.

Finally, at 9 p.m., we took the beast out of the oven. Bob cut it up and microwaved the pieces so everyone could finally have a slice as they headed out the door.

Did it all turn out okay? Depends on how you look at it.

Years later, I still haven’t lived it down. It didn’t seem funny at the time, but since we’ve been laughing about it ever since, maybe I could have found some humor in the moment.

I’ve learned that three things can help when well-laid plans go haywire:

1. Take deep breaths.

2. Ask for your fear-based thoughts to be healed.

3. Ask your guides to give you comfort and a glimpse of the next step.

Then look for the light in the situation—some spark of goodness or humor. It’s always there because the light is always in you. And, really, that’s all you need to know things are going to be okay, no matter how they look in the moment.

As it turns out, Bob and I are hosting Thanksgiving again this year. But we bought a fresh turkey, not frozen.

I’m wishing you and yours a happy and peaceful Thanksgiving, filled with gratitude for all the light in your life, and all the gifts you bring to mine.

With blessings,

Deb

A Sneak Peek at Let Your Spirit Guides Speak

My copies of Let Your Spirit Guides Speak came this morning, which makes this one of those days that authors live for. Opening the box of author copies, holding the book in your hand for the first time—and hoping you don’t see a typo when you open to a random page—there’s always that question: What will this book do in the world?

I hope it will offer you comfort, reassure you that you’re not alone, and give you some practical tools for finding guidance daily. To say thanks for your support, I want to share this short excerpt from the introduction of Let Your Spirit Guides Speak because it captures the essence of the book—why I wrote it and how it can bring more peace and abundance to your life. Enjoy!

If we can remember the unlimited spiritual guidance available to us, our problems—even the global ones—pale in comparison. Nothing is more powerful than the healing love of these spirit helpers. And when we draw on their assistance, we accelerate and amplify what’s possible for us and those around us.

There is no problem we cannot solve. But we need to ask for help from Spirit constantly—not just when we’re in crisis or we happen to remember. That means developing an ongoing relationship that’s different from how we might have thought of it before.
 


It’s easy to feel very alone in this world. Even in a crowd, even if you’re successful by the world’s standards, even in a marriage, even in a friendly neighborhood or busy workplace, we can feel adrift and far from home, and all our fears start chewing on us and eating us away, nibble by nibble. This makes life a struggle that it doesn’t need to be. And it prevents us from fully giving and receiving in life, limiting our ability to realize our own potential.


 


You have helpers standing right next to you. Introduce yourself. Ask them to introduce themselves to you. Close your eyes and let yourself feel their presence. Thank them even though you don’t know them yet.

Say yes. Be willing. And above all, believe that their help is as present and steadfast as the beating of your own heart.

 

The launch of Let Your Spirit Guides Speak is just one month away!

I’m SO happy about the timing of this book. The world around us keeps getting noisier and more complex…which means you’re probably craving a quiet voice of wisdom and reason.

That’s what your spirit guides can give you. Clear direction about your daily decisions. A safe harbor when you’re feeling anxious or alone. A relationship you can build day by day that will make your life infinitely more peaceful and successful.

I have to admit, writing about spirit guides is a bit out of my comfort zone. Even though I’ve listened to them all my life, I haven’t said much about them publicly.

But clearly, it’s time. If you’ve been using The Only Little Prayer You Need, you’ll love this book because it turns your prayers into an ongoing conversation, with all sorts of ways to listen and learn from the spirit guides who are devoted to you.

I’m really proud of Let Your Spirit Guides Speak because it can help you in so many important ways. Watch this short video to find out how.

 

You can pre-order the book today. And starting September 1, it’ll be available at Barnes and Noble and your favorite independent bookstores.

Look for news—coming soon—about the book launch party, brand new workshops to help you tune into your spiritual guidance, ways you can get involved, and new products you’re going to love!

Thank you, as always, for your enthusiasm! It’s a joy and privilege connecting with you and supporting you on your journey.

Blessings,

Deb

 

Why I’m Not Watching the Political Conventions

Today is the final day of the Republican National Convention, and the Democratic Convention starts next Monday. I’ve paid enough attention this week to get the gist (I won’t call them high points) of the proceedings, but I’ve made a conscious choice not to watch either convention.

It’s not about party affiliation. I’m turning off both conventions for the same five reasons:

Rhetoric that sounds like it comes from abusive parents has no place in my life. I was fortunate to have a steady and stable upbringing, but that wasn’t the case for a host of people I’ve worked with. The threatening language we’re hearing in these campaigns… READ MORE

Happy Fourth of July!

A way to honor the past….and create a fear-less future.

Photo courtesy of pixabay.com.

3 Common Thoughts that Keep You Stuck

As you move to a success-focused mindset, it’s essential to become aware of your thoughts and where they come from. Are they originating in your fear-based ego, or in your higher mind?

Photo courtesy of Pixabay.

It’s worth asking as you go through the day: Is that my ego talking? That said, here are three common ego thoughts that can keep you stuck in fear.

“I feel so guilty.”

These feelings and thoughts are part of being human, of course. But mistakes aren’t meant to be lifelong burdens. If you allow your mind to go round and round, revisiting the same guilt feelings or regrets about the past, you’ll completely miss the gifts of life right now.

As you go through the day today, become aware any time your thoughts linger in guilt or regret.

Then ask yourself, “Is there anything I need to apologize for or any amends I need to make?” If so, take at least one step toward doing so today.

Equally important, be open to the idea that you may be carrying guilt over past mistakes that no longer matter to anyone else, or that you’ve long since been forgiven for. Be aware that the primary person who needs to forgive you is you.

To support yourself, use some variation on this prayer:

“Please heal my fear-based thoughts about my past actions and thoughts so I can forgive myself, knowing I am worthy and free to receive all the gifts of the present moment.”

What if I make a mistake?

Just think of all the ways this ego thought impacts you. It could keep you from experiencing the most significant aspects of life…falling in love, having a family, starting a business, booking a trip, buying a house…even something as simple as ordering a menu item you’ve never had before.

If we give our power to this one thought, we can end up completely paralyzed.

The fear of making a mistake may disguise itself in different ways. For instance, it may look like the fear of being judged by others (or yourself). It could be the fear of looking silly or being ashamed. Or it could look like conformity to a family code that has always governed your behavior, maybe without your knowing it.

The truth is, we all make “mistakes” and take detours. Sometimes we have to regroup and chart a new course. And sometimes we find ourselves in a delicious new place that we wouldn’t have discovered if we had listened to our fear.

As you go through your day today, become aware any time the fear of making a mistake gets in your way. Then try this:

“Please heal my fear-based thoughts about making a mistake so I can move forward with joy, knowing that every experience is working toward my good.”

What if I disappoint someone?

True story: I married my first husband out of a lot of fear—fear of being alone, of not being able to support myself…and of disappointing him.

This was not a good idea.

“What if I disappoint someone?” can cause chronic unhappiness by making us think we’re being noble or dependable…but at the cost of our own joy. It can mire us in “shoulds” and convince us that everyone else’s feelings are more important than our own.

The ego does this to make itself feel important and indispensable, but the truth is that you’re important and indispensable by being the unique and genuine child of God that you are, not by trying to please everyone around you.

Pay attention through the day and see if some form of “What if I disappoint someone?” shows up in your mind. If so, try this:

“Please heal my fear-based thoughts about disappointing others so I can focus on what brings me joy and share that with the world.”

It’s not selfish to do this. In fact, it’s the most generous thing you can do.

Blessings,

Deb

Debra Engle is the author of The Only Little Prayer You Need . You can find her on Facebook and at debraengle.com.

Sharing a post from patheos.com

I posted this blog at patheos.com, and I want to share it here as well since the topic is so timeless. Whatever issues you’re facing, the solution always starts within.

What Does Terrorism Have to Do with Your Inner Peace?
November 17, 2015 by Debra Landwehr Engle 0 Comments

After the terrorist attacks in Paris last Friday, the Dalai Lama said:

“At 81, I believe [violence] cannot be resolved through prayers or government help. We have to begin the change at the individual level and then move on to neighborhood and society.”

It’s remarkable how different that message is from almost everything else in the media, where the endless conversation is all about The Other:

Who were the attackers? Where did they come from?
Were they radical Islam or radical jihadists?
How did they communicate?
When will they strike again?
How can we defeat them? How can we destroy them?

The questions go on and on. And in the middle of that fear and debate, here’s the Dalai Lama, reminding us that the end of terrorism begins with our own inner peace.

How is that possible? If you’re sitting in Davenport, Iowa, or Laramie, Wyoming, how could your inner peace possibly impact ISIS? Why does it even matter when, our ego mind says, we’ve got to figure out how big the terrorist network is, what encryption methods they used, and how many others may be involved?

It matters because we’re all connected in this body of humanity. We’ve come a long way in understanding the connections within our own physical body. Flossing your teeth can help prevent heart disease. Rubbing your big toe can alleviate migraine pain. At the same time, we’re in a crash course to grasp the biosystem in which we live, and how a change in land use on one side of the planet, for instance, can affect the amount of rain on the other.

But we seem to have a blind spot when it comes to the interconnectedness of the human race. We keep repeating the same old patterns, taking sides, sorting people into allies and enemies, and thinking we can permanently wipe out extremism by using extreme measures.

As the Dalai Lama reminds us, our individual lives do matter. We each have the power to incite more fear, or to diffuse it. If we focus on individual peace, we contribute to a whole of peace—and we may discover solutions that have been veiled by fear until now.

Second, it matters because our thoughts have energy. There are countless stories, but here’s one that happened recently: I received an email from a woman named Deb who has had a less-than-happy relationship with her mom. Her mom called her recently, and sure enough, started trashing the people in her life.

Without saying anything out loud, Deb asked Spirit to heal her own fear-based thoughts. She said the prayer to herself twice, hoping it would help her get through their conversation. But it had an unexpected effect. “Within two times repeating it,” Deb told me, “my mom’s whole side of the conversation changed from derogatory to pleasant, and she was looking for nice things to say about others. I’m not exaggerating when I say she has not done that in years.”

Again, this may seem far removed from terrorism. But think about it: When we ask for peace in our own lives, we help create it in the lives of those around us. And as Deb’s story shows, it can happen instantaneously.

And, third, finding inner peace matters because it recognizes the role of Spirit in our lives. The issue of terrorism seems daunting and practically insurmountable. But Spirit is certainly up to the task, especially if we’re willing to relinquish our own fears so we can become true agents of change.

This is far different from asking God to solve the problem for us. When we invoke the power of divine energy, we don’t need to defeat the ideology of The Other. Instead, we volunteer to be good stewards of an ideology that returns all of us to peace.

So…instead of listening to the 24-hour news cycle and speculating on what will happen next, try this: Close your eyes. Take a deep breath. Talk to the Divine, and ask to be used as an instrument of peace. Ask what that might look like for you. Ask for your fear-based thoughts to be healed. Ask to join with others who can help build a foundation of peace. Ask to have the courage to speak up for a different path. Ask for the spiritual strength to be steadfast in your own personal détente.

Your ego will say this is lame—as in, “Yeah, that’s sweet, but how are we going to keep ISIS out of Washington?”

Where you go from there is your choice: Back to fear of The Other, or back to your own individual peace. You choose. But remember, as the Dalai Lama has reminded us, the future of the world depends on it.

Proud to be blogging at patheos.com

morguefile.com/wunee

Starting today, I’m launching a blog on patheos.com, the world’s largest spirituality/religion site. I’m a big fan of this website because it has “channels” for all different religious and spiritual beliefs. That means you can read multiple perspectives and find blogs that support and challenge you. I love the fact that it respects all different paths.

I’m calling the blog Everyday Miracles, and you can find it in the Spirituality channel. Here’s my vision for the blog:

Choosing love over fear is at the heart of many spiritual teachings. But what does that mean in real life? How do you respond with love when you’re faced with conflict or loss? What does true forgiveness look like? And how can you find inner peace by becoming more aware of your own thoughts?

My intention is to help you sort it out through stories of people who are faced with the same challenges you deal with daily. By bringing spiritual principles down to earth where you can see them in practice, the blog will help you see through the lens of love rather than fear so you can make better decisions, experience more joy and live with Spirit as a constant companion and guide.

Please check it out at http://www.patheos.com/blogs/debraengleeverydaymiracles/ Once you’re there, click on the RSS feed if you’d like to subscribe and have new posts delivered directly to your email. And feel free to post comments, too.

I’m going to do some fun things with it…a special meditation series, discussion questions, etc. If there’s a topic that would be helpful for you or you’re most interested in, please let me know.

I’ll continue to blog here as well, but I hope you’ll join me on patheos.com, too. We all have a lot to learn from each other!

Thanking Wayne Dyer

In the past few days, I’m guessing millions of people around the world have thought about the ways they’ve been impacted by author and speaker Wayne Dyer, who passed on over the weekend at the age of 75.

Starting with the book Your Erroneous Zones in 1976, he became a legendary figure in spirituality and new thought, introducing words like “consciousness” and “manifestation” into our everyday lives.

At our house, our bookshelves may have more books by Wayne Dyer than any other single author. But it was his book Manifest Your Destiny that made the greatest impact on my husband Bob and me.

It was 2001, Bob and I were engaged, and we were searching for a house in the country. We’d been reading Manifest Your Destiny out loud to one another when we drove around the countryside, and we took Dr. Dyer’s advice to heart when he instructed us to write down everything we wanted as part of the manifestation process.

It took four pages, but we made a complete list of what we were looking for in a house. At the top of Bob’s list was plenty of space for his tools. I wanted a view with a pond and lots of trees.

Many of our “most wanted” items were compatible—an ample kitchen, guest rooms for friends and family, office space for both of our businesses.

But there was one sticking point. Bob wanted a new house. I wanted an older one. We weren’t sure how that gap would be bridged, but we took Wayne Dyer’s word for it and kept looking on faith.

Three weeks into our search, we were driving down the highway with the clipping of a classified ad in hand. As we searched for that address, we spotted another For Sale sign by the side of the road, and we spontaneously turned into the drive to take a look.

The driveway was lined with linden trees, and the rolling hills behind the house came into view as we drew closer.

The owner was sitting on the front porch swing with one of her children. When we asked if we could take a quick look, she said sure. “We just got home from church and the place is a mess, but you’re welcome to come on in.”

The trees and the view already looked promising, but when we stepped through the front door and saw a massive stone fireplace that looked like something out of a lodge, I felt chills up and down my arms.

A large garage with a workbench would easily accommodate Bob’s tools. The walkout basement would give both of us office space. And the kitchen overlooked a backyard filled with trees and, off in the distance, the neighbor’s pond.

I was still tingling when we asked the owner a question that we knew could be a deal-breaker: “How old is this house?”

His answer rang out like a direct message from Wayne Dyer himself:

“Well, it’s a funny thing about this house,” he said. “It’s both old and new.”

Ding, ding, ding. We had a winner.

The center portion of the house, he explained, was built in 1910 and was moved to its current site in the 1970s, when the owners added on. Other updates reinforced its  “old and new” status.

It was exactly what we wanted—something we weren’t sure even existed. And over the past 14 years, it has served us better than we could ever have expected, becoming a favorite spot for everything from annual Easter egg hunts and family card games to study groups and writing retreats. Without Wayne Dyer’s book, who knows where we’d be?

This is what great teachers do. They inspire us to put our faith in more than we think possible. As Dyer once said, “If you believe it will work out, you’ll see opportunities. If you believe it won’t, you will see obstacles.”

Thank you, Dr. Dyer, for helping us see the opportunities in our lives. You will be greatly missed in physical form, but your messages will live on in our hearts—and our old-and-new home—for years to come.

30-second inspiration

Sometimes inspiration takes a lot of words. Sometimes it takes five:

“Keep going, you’re doing great.”

My friend Margot has said that to me more times than I can count. Over the phone, in email…it doesn’t matter. Those five words give me a sense of comfort and encouragement every time.

I know a lot of you are dealing with some big challenges: selling your home, starting a new business, caring for a loved one, writing a book, juggling family and work responsibilities, adjusting to retirement, facing health issues…the list goes on and on.

So wherever you are and whatever’s on your plate, I hope you’ll remember Margot’s words of encouragement. No matter what you’re experiencing right now, these words are true for you:

Keep going. You’re doing great.

Have a fear-less week!