Marcus Lopes's Blog, page 6

Change is F*cking Hard

I’ve always been that person who, in everything they do, aims for perfection. It’s an unrealistic goal that often leaves me frustrated with myself. And that frustration with myself has peaked as I’ve struggled, over the past few months, to change some habits and, by extension, change my life. Even when I know what I need to do, change is f*cking hard.

Bring It Back to Why

Whenever I struggle to change a habit, and that’s been a lot lately, I remind myself to bring it back to my why. If I want to...

Take a Moment to Breathe

I can’t pretend that everything has been hunky-dory lately, because it hasn’t. Officially a year into my current job, the promise that it held has faded. I’m trying to see the good in it, but the poor communication, overbearing office politics, and the lack of respect among colleagues makes that challenging. And when a situation made it difficult for me to remain calm—and leave the negativity at work—I knew I needed to take a moment to breathe.

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You Know What to Do

Every day, I try to be a student of life. I look for the lessons and, as best as I can, try to learn from them. And as I continue along on my change journey, every day is a reminder of just how hard it can be to change your life. That was why, in a recent post, I wrote about the need to change what you can. And from that I want to dive a little deeper into another point: you know what to do.

The Faultline

For several months now, my main struggle has been to get in more writing time. There are se...

Hard Now, Easy Later

For the past few weeks, I’ve been putting in overtime hours at work. It’s not easy getting through the back-to-back twelve-hours shifts, and initially I declined the offer of overtime work. I wanted to have time to write, run, and do the things that matter to me. Because doing what matters has mattered more to me than money. But then I thought about some of my other goals, one of which includes paying off some debt. I realized overtime was a way to earn some extra cash to put towards that goal. ...

Change What You Can

For most of my adult life I’ve been a perfectionist. It started in university, when I found my academic groove, and wanted to excel at everything. When I didn’t get an A, I was devastated. I competed against myself to always do better on the next assignment or exam. After university, I sought to be the best in whatever role I took on, and that (in hindsight) created some tensions with my coworkers. And since my mid-thirties, I’ve been committed to growing and improving in all areas of my life. I...

Own It

The great thing about life is that the lessons never stop. If you are open, life is always speaking to you. The question is…will you listen? As I ‘celebrate’ my fifty-first birthday today, I hear the whispers of life. To show up. To do the work. And to own it. Yes, you must own your life, your decisions, your circumstances.

Do It Until

If you’ve ever tried to change something in your life, you know full well that change is hard. And since the middle of April, when I started working on changing m...

Stay Committed

In the age of social media and instantaneity, a lot of people are impatient for success. Despite what we know, there’s still a lot of talk about ‘overnight successes.’ The music artist that came out of nowhere. The first-time author who hit the bestseller list. The young athlete drafted into the NBA, NHL, or NFL. We know that behind every overnight success is someone who has slugged away at their craft for years (think Niecy Nash). And what got them there beyond their determination and hard work...

That Still Small Voice

In the run-up to my birthday last year, life was pretty good. I’d quit my job and had most of the summer off until I started my current one. I was running, writing, and doing many of the things I loved to do. Two days before my birthday, I was out for a run when, afterwards, I started to experience a dull pain in my chest. I thought I pulled a muscle and didn’t think anything of it. The pain didn’t really go away, I just ignored it. I kept running. I went kayaking. And two days after my birthday...

Reminder: It’s Okay to Ask for Help

When I decided back in April of this year that my life had to change—that I had to change—I was determined and focused. Even before that, I’d been making small changes to my routine, habits, and mindset that I thought would bring about change in my life. As I was dealing with a challenging work situation and fatigue, the positive changes I had made didn’t stick. I was slowly, but consistently, sliding back into the bad habits that kept me stuck in life. That was when I knew I had to ask for help...

Reminder: Be Yourself

I like quiet. And solitude. And when you work in an environment surrounded by extroverts, that gets a lot of raised eyebrows. I don’t participate in the idle chitchat that often transcends into gossip. Over the years, I’ve discovered that the best thing to do—for me—is to keep to myself. That makes me self-contained. It doesn’t matter what others think or say. And that brings me to this reminder: be yourself.

Your Life, Your Way

In Courage is Calling: Fortune Favours the Brave, Ryan Holiday open...