Matador Network's Blog, page 2292

Help kids and crush stuff in a tank

YOU HAVE until tomorrow (March 14, 2014) midnight to enter for a chance to fly to LA, meet Arnold Schwarzenegger, and crush things in his tank. This is a fundraiser for the After School All-Stars, a nation-wide program that looks to empower youth for a better chance at positive futures.

One entry costs $10, but you can buy entries in bulk and get discounts. Every dollar donated will be matched by Ahnold himself. To enter, click here.

If I went, I’d request to crush poverty. What would you crush?

The post Crush things in a tank with Arnold Schwarzenegger and help America’s kids appeared first on Matador Network.

7 places gringos love in Brazil

1. Inhotim (Brumadinho, Minas Gerais)

Photo: Casa Fora do Eixo Minas

This one goes out to art lovers everywhere. Imagine a private property set within mountains, ornamented with exquisite plants and some of the most dramatic visual installations you’ve seen. Welcome to Instituto Inhotim.

A first-time visitor should take at least two days to see it all. The biggest outdoor center of arts in Latin America, Inhotim is an immense botanical garden holding ~500 pieces produced by Brazilian and international artists spread over a property comprising 3,000 acres. Some are big names, such as Dan Graham and Hélio Oiticica. My favorite piece is this mirror glass structure hidden inside the woods.

The place is super organized, the ticket price isn’t outrageous, and there are lodging options for every budget. As Brazilians so often say: “It doesn’t even feel like we’re in Brazil!” #risos

2. Iguazu Falls (Paraná)

Photo: markg6

Iguazu Falls, located at the border intersection of Brazil / Argentina / Paraguay, puts Niagara to shame, with a total width of 2.7km.

Only Victoria Falls can beat Iguazu in quantitative metrics, but while the South American site divides itself into smaller falls and allows for views from several angles, Victoria is an overwhelming wall of water that needs a helicopter to be fully appreciated. If you dig this sort of comparison, check this article.

Iguazu sits inside a national park, filled with tourists all year round. There are boardwalks over the water, lots of animals to see (beware of the small mammals called quatis — they’re everywhere and tend to steal snacks, hats, cameras, and pretty much everything you make available), boats to get closer to the falls themselves, and all sorts of organized tours. (Note: Views are better from the Argentinian side.)

3. Fernando de Noronha

Photo: Henrique Vicente

This archipelago is home to some of the most beautiful beaches in a country with plentiful beautiful beaches. There’s a strict cap on the number and duration of visits, and professional guides are required for all swimming and diving. It’s quite a trek from the mainland, with flights leaving from the northeast cities of Recife and Natal.

There are posadas and hotels available, but they must be booked in advance and respect the island’s population limit. When considering plane tickets, hotel fees, guided tour fees, and food costs, it becomes clear that this is no cheap vacation. To say that’s the reason why Noronha is being so well cared for can’t be proved, but one thing is for certain: No one wins if scenery like this is lost.

4. Jericoacoara (Ceará)

Photo: ground.zero

The story goes it was in the late ’90s that a famous travel guide named Jericoacoara “one of the top 10 beaches in the world.” That was enough to bring local and foreign tourists stampeding onto the vast sand dunes that once separated Jeri from the rest of the world.

It’s easy to understand what must have struck the guidebook author about the place. I can almost see him eating fresh oysters washed down with cold beer, watching small fishing boats traversing the waves, while enjoying the unceasing breeze with both feet planted on the seashore. But truth be told: This is not even one of the most beautiful beaches on the Brazilian coast. Especially not now that tourism has run amok. Think expensive tours, teen prostitution, and a place called Planet Jeri (as in Planet Hollywood, but worse).

5. The Amazon

Photo: lubasi

The Amazon region extends into Peru, the Guianas, Ecuador, Colombia, and Bolivia. But it’s become synonymous with the enormous Amazonas state in the northwest part of Brazil. That’s where you’ll find the city of Manaus, with its old theater (did you know Jack White got married there? true story!) and famous tacacá soup.

It’s possible to visit the area on a budget, but the Amazon is no easy terrain to access — hence the rise of the high-end eco-resort. Since going on your own outside the defined perimeters is only for the brave (it’s a jungle out there, and a humid, mosquito-filled one), tourists who stick to the program will find several options for boat rides, tribe visiting, and animal-watching excursions.

What the Amazon lacks in practical visiting, it compensates for with a feeling of sublimity you won’t get many other places. It’s a rich, thick, luscious environment, fragile and strong at the same time.

6. Rio

Photo: Gustavo Valentim

There are several reasons why gringos are crazy about Rio, and it’s easy to agree with them. Arpoador, Cristo Redentor, Pão de Açucar, the bars, the people, the most exuberant Carnival parade on Earth.

And then you have the trashy hostels, abundant sexual tourism, favela tours, cheap cocaine, and that intense, anything-goes vibe. Rio has it all and is one of the most beautiful cities in the world, hands down.

7. The Pantanal

Photo: Nori Almeida

This is a place for photographic safaris, colorful sunsets, amazing food, and an honest sense of being immersed in a vivid culture. Pantanal (pântano is Portuguese for “swamp”) became a popular destination back in the 1980s, after a local soap opera set in the region got national attention. The region is set up for tourists, with good transportation and super comfortable fazendas that take care of everything you need, whether it’s a matter of spending the day fishing, riding horses, or lying in a hammock.

Near the Pantanal, you’ll also find the touristic hot spot of Bonito (translates to “beautiful”), where transparent waters full of fish attract local families. Like Noronha, this is a controlled touristic environment, with visitor limits and guided-only walks. Gorgeous indeed.

The post 7 places gringos love to visit in Brazil (and why they’re mostly right on) appeared first on Matador Network.

Věra Chytilová dies, aged 85

MY RELATIONSHIP WITH Czech film began when I lived in Prague in 2008; I had a non-traditional academic program that was experiential, rather than based on lectures, and was arts-immersive. One component consisted of private film screenings at Kino MAT. It was there where I saw Sedmikrásky (Daisies), for the first time.

The film was unlike anything I’d ever seen. The filmmaker, Věra Chytilová, was ahead of her time, and an integral figure in Czech New Wave Cinema of the 1960s. Daisies, which debuted in 1966 (just two years before the Prague Spring of 1968), was an absurdist social commentary against the Communist government. It was banned within the country immediately, but received media acclaim internationally. Věra directed over twenty five films in her lifetime.

It’s amazing that I have lived alongside people who were part of cultural revolutions, and that I am able to honor their lives once they pass. Maybe you’ve never heard of Věra, but maybe today is the day where you watch a few clips of her work on YouTube, or read her page on IMDB, and learn something new.

The post Avant-garde Czech film director Věra Chytilová dies, aged 85 appeared first on Matador Network.

Around the world: 10 music festivals

Music festivals worldwide are similar: loud music, bad food, long lines, kids walking around in groups and varying levels of sobriety. Not to mention your legs giving up after the fourth gig in a row. What makes a difference is the location. Think mountain resorts in Japan, F1 racetracks in São Paulo, a hot spring in Iceland.

The international music festival season starts in late March with Lollapalooza Chile. With hundireds of events taking place around the world, here are 10 of the best.

1. Lollapalooza Brasil

Photo: Douglas Arruda

Where/when: São Paulo, Brazil / April 5 to 6, 2014

Who’s playing: Arcade Fire, Nine Inch Nails, Pixies, Phoenix, New Order, Vampire Weekend, Savages, Julian Casablancas, Vespas Mandarinas, Nação Zumbi

Lollapalooza landed in Brazil in 2012 and established itself as São Paulo’s main music event. In 2013, the festival will try a new location: Interlagos racetrack, where São Paulo Formula 1 GP happens. Pretty far from the city center, but there is easy access by train.

2. Moogfest

Photo: Jeff Gunn

Where/when: Asheville, NC, USA / April 23 to 27, 2014

Who’s playing: Kraftwerk, Chic with Nile Rodgers, Giorgio Moroder, Pet Shop Boys, Moderat, Daedalus, Mark Farina, Tiga

Created in New York in 2004, Moogfest moved to Asheville in 2010. This is the city where Moog’s synthesizer creator Robert Moog spent the last 30 years of his life. There are dozens of DJs and electronic live acts, workshops, lectures, and music label showcases.

3. Pitchfork Music Festival

Photo: Incase

Where/when: Chicago, IL, USA / July 18 to 20, 2014

Who’s playing: Beck, Grimes, Neutral Milk Hotel, Slowdive, Sharon Van Etten, Wild Beasts, Death Grips, Tune Yards, DIIV

The indie webzine turned most influential music website in the world is also successful IRL. It started inside Barcelona’s Primavera Sound and now exports the format to Paris every November. The Chicagoan edition is sort of a hipster playground, but the lineup is always interesting, fresh, and eclectic. Beware of the intense heat waves and go for it.

4. Mutek/Elektra: UM15

Photo: Semiconductor Films

Where/when: Montreal, Canada / May 27 to June 1, 2014

Who’s playing: Nicolas Jaar presents From Scratch, Audion, Move D. Full lineup will have more than 100 names on it.

Mutek’s more than a music festival; it’s an “institution of digital creativity.” While they can be serious about their music, the festival itself is loads of fun, with diehard music geeks coming from all over the world. In 2014 Mutek’s joining forces with Elektra festival. They promise “an expansive multidimensional experience,” whatever that is.

5. Monegros Desert Festival

Photo: gaudiramone

Where/when: Fraga, Spain / July 19, 2014

Who’s playing: Not yet announced, but in 2013 there was Ben Sims, Justice, Marco Carola, Richie Hawtin, Surgeon, Underworld, Vitalic, and PET Duo.

There is house, drum ‘n’ bass, or dubstep, but trust me: This is a techno festival. Monegros happens in the Spanish desert and lasts for 24 hours. In 2014, the festival celebrates its 20th edition with a special lineup.

6. Terraneo

Photo: Terraneo Festival

Where/when: Šibenik, Croatia / August 12 to 16, 2014

Who’s playing: To be announced, but the interwebs are saying Crystal Castles, Mogwai, La Roux, and The Raveonettes. In 2013 headliners were The Prodigy, Azealia Banks, and My Bloody Valentine.

This is sort of a new festival, one among many in the ever-expanding summer festival scene in Croatia. Terraneo has an ‘eco’ vibe, with debates and workshops. It happens by the sea and has a nearby camping area, with buses transporting festivalgoers day and night.

7. Fuji Rock

Photo: Kentaro Ohno

Where/when: Yuzawa, Niigata, Japan / July 25 to 27, 2014

Who’s playing: In 2013 headliners were The Cure, Björk, Nine Inch Nails, Skrillex, and The xx. The festival also featured Foals, Savages, and Yo La Tengo. Among many, many others. It’s huge.

Japan’s biggest outdoor event attracts more than 100,000 people, lasts three full days, and has more than 200 bands and artists each year. Started below Mount Fuji in 1997, it now happens at a ski resort.

8. Glastonbury

Photo: Adam Russell

Where/when: Somerset, England / June 27 to 29, 2014

Who’s playing: Tons of people, really. Outkast, Arcade Fire, Lily Allen, and who knows.

When someone says “music festival,” the image that comes to mind is a huge stage, flags flowing in the wind, lots of hands in the air — it’s Glastonbury. But there is more: 50 or so stages and camping areas, each with its own pace and vibe. The festival started in 1970 and stands as the most traditional music event around. Good luck finding tickets, though.

9. Iceland Airwaves

Photo: Jonathan Fletcher

Where/when: Reykjavík, Iceland / November 5 to 9, 2014

Who’s playing: The Flaming Lips, East India Youth, Highlands, and several artists with lots of consonants. Full list still to be announced.

Great bands, gorgeous people, and an after-party taking place in a giant hot spring. I’d go.

10. The Falls Music and Arts Festival

Photo: Damien Naidoo

Where/when: New South Wales, Tasmania, and Victoria, Australia / December 28, 2014, to January 1, 2015

Who’s playing: To be announced. Last year it was !!! (Chk, Chk, Chk), Grizzly Bear, The Wombats, Solange, Chet Faker, and Bonobo, among others.

Among the many music festivals that happen in the Australian summer, Falls distinguishes itself. The festival takes place almost at the same time in three different spots. There’s still almost a whole year to go, so keep checking the website for up-to-date information.

The post Around the world in 10 of this year’s top music festivals appeared first on Matador Network.

20 strangers' first kiss [vid]

OVERNIGHT, this video of 20 strangers’ first kiss has completely blown up people’s newsfeeds. It’s now near 40 million views in less than three days. Take a minute to watch if you haven’t yet; the bits of awkwardness and fumbling at first “meeting,” the acceleration of emotions and physicality of the kisses, and most of all (for me anyway) the slow, at times almost unwilling separations make for undeniable feelings of tenderness, even joy.

But (why is there always a “but”?), as Slate and others rightfully point out, the video is carefully crafted to produce these effects. The actors are not necessarily “strangers,” but for the most part models, performers, people used to being in front of the camera. And most importantly, the piece itself is actually a promotion for a clothing brand:

Actually, it’s an advertisement for clothes, and most of these strangers are professional performers who are experienced in acting out love, sex, and intimacy for crowds. The cast includes models Natalia Bonifacci, Ingrid Schram, and Langley Fox (daughter of actress Mariel Hemingway and sister of model Dree); musicians Z Berg of The Like, Damian Kulash of OK Go, Justin Kennedy of Army Navy, singer Nicole Simone, and singer-actress Soko (who also performed the melancholy indie music that accompanies the short); and actors Karim Saleh, Matthew Carey, Jill Larson, Corby Griesenbeck, Elisabetta Tedla, Luke Cook, and Marianna Palka. Is it really unexpectedly touching that when gorgeous and charismatic Italian models, French actors, indie band leaders, and Hollywood royalty get together to kiss one another—under a soundtrack that prompts, “If you’re not ready for love, how can you be ready for life?”—the results are “beautiful”?

My response is: If it produces joyful emotions, who cares?

Honestly, had I not had the experience of being on TV this past year I might have responded differently to this criticism. But during my experience being on set, being filmed for Take Part Live, I learned something. Even though the questions for a segment may be scripted; even though there’s “prep” as far as seeing the set beforehand, having makeup and hair, etc., none of this diminishes in any way how “real” the interactions are when you’re finally there and the camera is rolling. It doesn’t diminish the emotions you feel inside, and if the director is able to convey these emotions outwardly, then it’s a successful shoot.

I can’t help but think of my interview with Casey Niestat earlier this year and the subject of people calling out his Philippines typhoon relief video because it was sponsored by Fox Studios in conjunction with The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. Casey said [about the haters]: “At the end of the day we were able to help people.” That’s what mattered to him.

In the same way, if a video of strangers kissing brings a bit of joy to 40mm peoples’ days, who cares if it’s in support of a clothing brand. This is 2014. It’s time to let go of the sacred cow of a hard line between commercial and art, literature and advertising, product and news, whatever dichotomy you want to set up, whatever you call it. Emotions are the fuel of people’s lives, and whatever you can create to produce those emotions (and whatever you do with them) is what matters.

The post 20 strangers’ first kiss is unexpectedly touching…and those calling it out are missing the point appeared first on Matador Network.

17 of the best Airbnbs in Berlin [pics]

THE AWESOME AND REVOLUTIONARY WEBSITE Airbnb allows pretty much anyone with a web connection to rent out their home to visiting tourists, and it manages to do it more or less without the creep factor (unlike, say, a rental notice on Craigslist). I personally prefer Airbnb because it offers a homey feel when you’re traveling, which is usually much needed after spending day after day in stale and homogenous hotel rooms or hostel dormitories.

When I’m looking through the site, I usually can’t afford to stay at the nicer spots, but it’s a fun exercise in wishful thinking — especially when some people are willing to rent out their private islands. Here are some of the best ones I’ve found in Berlin — some in the “yeah, I could maybe swing that” category, and others in the “not in a million years” category.

1

Penthouse in Prenzlauerberg
I’ve never even been in a penthouse, let alone one that’s made of sunshine. This one sits in the city center, with views of Alexanderplatz, and it has an absolutely gorgeous rooftop garden. It’s the type of apartment that a down-on-his-luck writer has in virtually every sitcom and movie, but in real life, is usually reserved for rather successful businessmen. We writers just ain’t that lucky, so we have to live out our fantasies through our stories.





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Intermission





6 baller crash pads in Berlin [pics]





What it takes to rent an apartment in Berlin





27 of the world’s burliest bungee jumps [PICs]












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Dream Home in Kreuzberg
Occasionally you read the name that an owner has given their place and you think, “Okay, that’s a little bit much.” Dream Home is an exception. I mean, Jesus. It’s also in Kreuzberg, it has a view of the canal right across the street, and it has an awesome no-rail stairway that’s existence in America would be completely impossible thanks to litigation culture. It also has a balcony, it’s not too expensive, it has a canoe available, and, oh hey, kids stay free. It legitimately annoys me that some people have their shit enough together to own a home like this.





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Loft in Kreuzberg
I’m resigned by now to the fact that I’m probably never going to live la vie boheme. Berlin has been establishing itself lately as one of the main cultural centers of Europe, however, and much of this centers around the artsy neighborhood of Kreuzberg. So any of the places available in Kreuzberg are basically going to be top on my list, because I not only want to live la vie boheme, but I want to be the first to live it with money. This loft was one of my favorites: overlooking a garden with absolutely crazy amounts of space that I was not aware was possible in major cities anymore.





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Intermission





15 super unique libraries around the world [PICs]





82 iconic world landmarks to visit before you die [PICs]





40 of the most creative custom bikes on the road [pics]












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Salon in Mitte
Some of the spots you find on Airbnb are less places to crash for the night, and more places to hold an event. I’ve never wanted to become a vulture capitalist, but this room might make me switch careers from impoverished travel writer to robber baron. It looks like it’s made entirely of mahogany and burnt leather, and I bet it smells like pipe smoke. It reminds me of the line from New Girl: “When I put my hands on this desk, I feel sexually proficient for the first time in my life.”





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“BlissRoom” in Prenzlauerberg
Any place called “BlissRoom” can’t be that bad. I took a single look at this and thought, “This has to be owned by a yoga instructor.” Turns out, no, it’s owned by a Healing Practitioner and Massage Therapist, but it underscores my point: People working in the relaxing arts are the best decorators. Also in Prenzlauerberg, which is right by the city center, this one (unlike many on this list) is actually pretty cheap, and is totally a place I could end up crashing. So this is in the realm of potential wish-fulfillment.





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Intermission





25 animals way weirder than anything you’ve seen in science fiction [pics]





75 places so colorful it’s hard to believe they’re real [pics]





15 of the most haunted places in the world [pics]












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Pension Berlin in Kreuzberg
We’re going with one that has less of a “sunshine and daydreams” decorating vibe to it for this one. For this one, we’ve got artists. In their reception area, they’ve got ever-changing “exhibitions” – which is what I’m going to start calling my fridge magnets – and they’ve got their own private cinema downstairs. Yes please. On top of all that, the home’s electricity is entirely green. So it’s got that going for it, which is nice.





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Apartment in Mitte
I really don’t know what it is about this one that I love – maybe it’s the mini-pillows shaped like Mac OS icons, maybe it’s that the bulletin board in the kitchen has a drinking game on it, or maybe it’s because its decorating style seems to switch between “trendy” and “I’m on a boat,” but this is absolutely where I’m gonna try and crash the next time I’m in Berlin.





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Flat in Kreuzberg
I did not think I’d be including a place based solely off of their kitchen table, but this is a gigantic slab of concrete that has the stove built into it, and can seat ten people. I want to sit around that table over an elaborate meal with all of my friends before going out. The rest of the place looks cool as well, but it’s on the list for the awesome kitchen table.





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Castle Kreuzberg
You remember that time you said, “Hey, I hope I never sleep on a hammock in a goddamn castle?” Yeah, me neither. This one’s back up in the “pricey” range at $637 a night, but seriously guys: There’s a hammock, and it’s in a castle. It also has a private park.





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“Undiscovered Art” in Prenzlauer Berg
I’m a sucker for closed-in porches on cobblestone streets in trendy parts of Berlin. This is right across from the “Kulturbrauerei,” or “Culture Brewery,” which has a bunch of theaters and clubs. And I’d like to point out that for whatever reason, German architects seem to have figured out how to make literally any room in any building absolutely flooded with light. Get back on your game, America, I’m tired of living in the dark.





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Nomads Apartment in Mitte
Like the castle, this is a pricey one, but it features a punching bag. Right in the middle of everything. That should be a feature in literally every living room in every household. It would solve so many problems. That said, it’s in the city center, it has an absolutely gorgeous view from the balcony, and it has pictures featuring swear words over the beds. I’ll take it.





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Garden Penthouse in Wilmersdorf
This is a longer-term stay: The minimum is 15 nights, which, trust me, once you see the price tag, will be plenty of time. It’s two floors though, and the top floor has a wrap-around balcony with views of south Berlin. The security deposit alone is significantly more than the entire budget of my upcoming visit to Europe, but hey, if my being poor means someone else is rich enough to crash at this place that is literally more expensive in a month than my apartment is for two years, then I’ll take it.





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6 Room Apartment by Brandenburg Gate
While the price tag initially looks a little steep on this one ($849 a night), it actually houses 16 people and is right near Brandenburg Gate, the Reichstag, and Alexanderplatz. So it’s incredibly affordable (if you’ve got a big enough crew rolling with you), and it’s a pretty nice place that appears to have used literally all of the white marble in Germany.





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Luxury Penthouse in Mitte
Yet another awesome penthouse with a communal building rooftop, and its very own blue bar. This is the most affordable penthouse we’ve listed so far, at only $396 a night for up to 6 people.





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House in Tempelhof
This house gets on the list for a single reason: It includes a sauna. It does not appear that anyone has stayed here yet (and it might have something to do with the fact that under “bed type” instead of saying “Twin” or “Queen,” it just says, “Real”), but honestly, my dream day of travel involves walking around the city all day, returning home, sitting in the sauna, and then hydrating and going out for the night. So I’ll sleep on a “Real” bed if it means I get to do that.





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Modern Apartment in Kreuzberg
My first thought when I looked at this one was, “Oh god, I want that bookshelf.” A lot of messing around on Airbnb is basically just looking at bookcase porn. But this place looks incredible, and it’s one of those rare places that has nothing but glowing reviews.





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Luxury Apartment at Potsdamer Platz
This place is actually in the Sony Center in the heart of Berlin, and the views are absolutely incredible. It’s super trendy and has a kitchen that’s got more chrome than pretty much any non-restaurant kitchen I’ve ever seen, and it’s actually reasonably affordable if you bring enough people with you.





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The post 17 of the best Airbnbs in Berlin [pics] appeared first on Matador Network.

5 things I learned as a ghostwriter

Photo: Nana B Agyei

WHEN YOU’RE TRYING TO BE a writer for hire, you agree to writing pretty much anything people will hire you to write. Sometimes that means agreeing to write for a celebrity dentist/beautician when you’re a disgusting bearded guy with no healthcare. Sometimes that means convincing Nobel laureates to attend a global forum on a topic you got a 1 on for your high school AP exam.

My point is, if you’re not an expert in something, you learn how to sound like one if you want to get paid, and by proxy you figure out how to sound like the people who actually are the experts. And through it all, you learn some valuable things about people, as I have.

Not all gay men say “fabulous.”

In my few years of ghostwriting, I’ve publicly pretended to be multiple relatively high-profile gay men who, if you have cable, literally might be on your television right now. As I wrote for these men, throwing myself into their voices without ever actually watching their design shows, my instincts screamed the word “fabulous” basically every time I needed a positive adjective.

Then I remembered that I should probably do some research about the people I was imitating, and read their blogs and social media feeds (which in all probability were at least partially ghostwritten by another dude just like me) to find not one use of the token-gay-friend-in-a-’90s-sitcom go-to word. Lesson being: People are complex, no matter how much you may find yourself trying to simplify them into something replicatable, something thinly defined.

Interior designers don’t drop Star Wars refs.

I’ve had a startling amount of highly successful designers as clients, which is not an ideal market for a guy whose idea of feng shui is hanging a dartboard over a 5 x 5 sheet of plywood next to his desk. After the initial surge of anger at finding that people pay other people they don’t know more money than I will make in the next 20 years to decide what color their couch should be, I realized that writing for a woman like this would require me to change my creative mindset completely.

I know, this sounds obvious, but one of the biggest issues I’ve seen for ghostwriters is the tendency to allow things to slip from their own realm of experience into the words of a surrogate author who doesn’t share those experiences. If you’re representing a national brand for someone whose market and image are highly refined, middle-aged, and almost definitely not into any of the things you are, you have to control your impulse to say things you would say. No matter how perfect you think that Tosche Station reference fits, remember that you have to forget everything you like and become a person who doesn’t know anything about where to find power converters.

Not everyone is funny.

Building off the last section, sometimes the hardest thing to do as a ghostwriter is pull back on personality aspects most people appreciate if it isn’t aligned with the personality traits of the surrogate author’s. This is especially difficult for pun-lovers, because practically everything you write will have an opportunity for a pun somewhere, and you will want to exploit it.

Nobody wants to admit they have no sense of humor, but sometimes it’s more a matter of the person’s industry than his/her voice. The only thing more important in ghostwriting than knowing the voice you’re taking on is knowing the audience you’re taking on, and those two things need to be in harmony. So don’t crack the pun just because it’s there, don’t make a joke because you think the post could use a little levity. In short: If your client wouldn’t say it, don’t say it.

Not everyone needs perfect grammar.

The internet has its own rules of grammar and formatting. Every blog isn’t Chicago style, phonetic spelling is okay, and not everyone knows how to use a serial semicolon. That doesn’t mean you need to allow “there/their” mishaps, but you should find ways to rephrase what you’re saying if it means avoiding alienating syntax or complex grammar most other people don’t know. It also means that if your client writes things like “WAAahhHooOO!!” or uses “good” as an adverb or sometimes accentuates an ellipsis with two extra periods, then you need to suck it up and get over your need to control people and follow suit if it aligns with the expectations of his/her audience.

I’ve been called a grammar Nazi in my day, and I don’t disagree that I have been at certain times in my life. However, the main point of grammar is to establish clarity of communication, and sometimes ditching the “rules” allows you to communicate in a clearer or more compelling way. Ghostwriting has helped me understand that and allow for it, even in real life. I don’t correct people in conversation anymore, and my life and relationships are better for that.

People are okay with not giving you credit.

I remember reading in an article in Poets & Writers that it’s likely the vast majority of books written by politicians and celebrities are ghostwritten, which probably means the real writer interviewed the “author” for a while and then wrote the whole thing and got a thumbs-up if it sounded good. That’s not much of a surprise, probably, but think about it: How many times have you seen a book written by a big name non-writer and saw credit on the cover given to a ghostwriter? Probably not many.

Of course, sometimes credit is given discreetly in small print — as it is with story outsourcers like Clive Cussler and Tom Clancy (RIP) — but sometimes it isn’t at all. When I found that one of my clients’ clients (for whom I wrote/edited and managed a blog) had won a blogging award and an all-expense-paid trip to NYC for a presentation, I joked to our “middlewoman” that this client might mention me in her speech at the ceremony. “Oh no,” she told me, “I advise my clients specifically not to do that. It hurts their credibility.”

At least I got paid, I guess.

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I am a Ukrainian [vid]

MONTHS AFTER IT STARTED, the crisis in Ukraine has become such a gigantic mess that, in the media at least, it’s reported as having to do less with Ukraine and more with the faceoff between the United States and Russia. This Cold War throwback may be important on a geopolitical scale, but it’s also essential to remember this didn’t start with Barack Obama or Vladimir Putin, but with common Ukrainians protesting their government in Kiev’s Independence Square.

So as things will likely get worse before they get better, watch this message from Yulia Marushevska, reminding us this is a people’s fight, not just a fight between superpowers.

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Meet the MatadorU Student of the Month: Colm Fitzgerald

EVERY MONTH, MatadorU faculty members select one standout student from a pool of weekly selections nominated by both faculty and students.

For the month of February, MatadorU Travel Writing and Travel Photography student Colm Fitzgerald was selected for the honor. The work he’s been producing in MatadorU has us proud — especially when he revealed that prior to enrolling in MatadorU, he hadn’t really been writing in nearly a decade. We sat down with Colm recently to talk about his experience with MatadorU, how he’s been managing two courses at once, and his favorite climbing spots.

Sarah Park: Congrats, Colm! Let’s start off with some background info.

Colm Fitzgerald: I was born in Ireland and immigrated to Southern California when I was three. My dad is from Dublin and grew up Catholic, and my mom is from Belfast and was raised protestant, so I think this was one of the reasons we moved.

Growing up in California, my older brother and I were always the “Irish kids,” whereas when we visited family in Ireland we were the “Americans.” From an early age we became accustomed to traveling, whether it was to Ireland or on camping trips with the Boy Scouts. I’ve always been attracted to adventure and exploring wild places. It’s in these places, far from cities, that I’ve had my most meaningful experiences. Backpacking with friends, rock climbing, and taking road trips with my wife are the things I live for.

On your profile in MatadorU, you talk about how rock climbing led to lots of travel for you — where’s your favorite place to climb?

My favorite rock climbing destination is actually somewhat of a secret spot. So I won’t be sharing that! In a close second would have to be La Pedriza near Madrid, Spain. Amazing bouldering and a lifetime of routes on rosy Spanish granite, surrounded by pine trees and mountain streams.

So, you mentioned to a faculty member that before Chapter 1′s assignment, you hadn’t really written anything in 10 years! What brought about the change for you?

Throughout high school and for the short time I was in college writing was always very enjoyable for me. But before starting the MatadorU course I honestly hadn’t written anything since I was 19. I’m now almost 30!

The topic of career change has been a big issue lately and a couple months ago my wife said, “Hey, you love to travel and you like to write, why don’t you be a travel writer?” So I Googled travel writing and found MatadorU.com.

Awesome! We’re happy you found us! On the subject of career change then, what are your career aspirations?

I would absolutely love to travel and write for a living. I read National Geographic as a kid and I’m sure, like many people, daydreamed about joining expeditions to far flung destinations. I never really pursued writing though, and for the past six years my wife Anita and I have owned a window cleaning business. We work very hard but have the freedom to travel whenever we like. I am seeking to transition, however, into a career where I can feel more creatively fulfilled.

What’s been the most challenging part of your MatadorU courses so far and what parts have been your favorites?

So far, the writing course has been equally challenging and pleasurable. I found the research assignment to be a little tough because it wasn’t writing an exciting story or about an event that I vividly remember. But I learned so much more about the city I live in through exploring and asking people questions. The assignment motivated me to dig deeper into my local history and culture.

My favorite part of the writing course has been the fact that I now go on trips with storytelling in mind. Wherever I go, my senses are more acutely tuned for what’s happening around me.

You’re enrolled in both the writing and photography courses. What inspired you to enroll in both courses?

I enrolled in both the writing and the photography courses because I believe both are essential to storytelling in the modern arena. One can create vivid imagery with words but a photo can often bring up emotions and primal feelings that words simply can’t. Writing, on the other hand, allows the reader to imagine and create mental scenes on a personal level unique to each individual.

What would be your dream travel journalism opportunity and what stories do you hope to tell?

My dream travel writing opportunity would be to document adventures into vast wildernesses or climbers exploring and putting up new routes. Sustainable living and environmental stewardship are also topics that I’m very keen on. In my opinion, conservation and sustainability issues are the biggest challenges we face today and all we hear about is the economy. To paraphrase Chief Seattle,”you can’t eat money.”

You recently submitted a piece from the Bounty Board (specific submission calls by Matador, exclusive to MatadorU students)…what was it about the proposed title that spoke to you? Any advice for other students who are perusing the options on Matador Access, but aren’t sure whether or not they should take the next step?

The ““>How To Piss Off…” series is just genius. I was drawn to write my own piece after reading a few of the others on the Matador Network. It’s such an excellent way to relay what makes different people tick and the diversity of our world. I love how a lot of it is tongue-in-cheek and the authors poke fun at both the inconsiderate offender / tourist and the peevish victim / local. These pieces also get people talking and comments from those who take the articles at face value are especially entertaining.

For anyone not sure about submitting to an opening on Matador Access, I would say just dive in. Give it your best shot and worst case scenario you find out where you stand with your writing. Write about something you know and it’ll flow like The Ganges. We’re all here to improve our craft and I for one have a LOT to learn.

To learn more about Colm Fitzgerald, keep your eyes on Matador for his upcoming contribution to our “How to piss off” series or check out his blog at californiawild.wordpress.com, where he posts stories about excursions around California.

Student of the Month honorees are selected based on not only the quality of their work, but the progress they’ve made throughout the course, the effort and enthusiasm they show during their MatadorU journey, and their willingness to support and help their fellow students. Check out MatadorU.com for more information about our travel writing, photography, and filmmaking courses, and to learn how you can join Colm in our community of travel journalists from around the world.

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The problem with voluntourism

Removing rocks from buckets of beans in Tanzania. Photos: Author

White people aren’t told that the color of their skin is a problem very often. We sail through police checkpoints, don’t garner sideways glances in affluent neighborhoods, and are generally understood to be predispositioned for success based on a physical characteristic (the color of our skin) we have little control over beyond sunscreen and tanning oil.

After six years of working in and traveling through a number of different countries where white people are in the numerical minority, I’ve come to realize that there is one place being white is not only a hindrance, but a negative: most of the developing world.

In high school, I traveled to Tanzania as part of a school trip. There were 14 white girls, one black girl who, to her frustration, was called white by almost everyone we met in Tanzania, and a few teachers/chaperones. $3,000 bought us a week at an orphanage, a half-built library, and a few pickup soccer games, followed by a week-long safari.

Our mission while at the orphanage was to build a library. Turns out that we, a group of highly educated private-boarding-school students, were so bad at the most basic construction work that each night the men had to take down the structurally unsound bricks we had laid and rebuild the structure so that, when we woke up in the morning, we would be unaware of our failure. It is likely that this was a daily ritual. Us mixing cement and laying bricks for 6+ hours, them undoing our work after the sun set, re-laying the bricks, and then acting as if nothing had happened so that the cycle could continue.

Basically, we failed at the sole purpose of our being there. It would have been more cost effective, economically stimulative, and efficient for the orphanage to take our money and hire locals to do the work, but there we were, trying to build straight walls without a level.

That same summer, I started working in the Dominican Republic at a summer camp I helped organize for HIV+ children. Within days, it was obvious that my rudimentary Spanish set me so far apart from the local Dominican staff that I might as well have been an alien. Try caring for children who have a serious medical condition, and are not inclined to listen, in a language that you barely speak. It isn’t easy. Now, six years later, I am much better at Spanish and am still highly involved with the camp programming, fundraising, and leadership. However, I have stopped attending, having finally accepted that my presence is not the godsend I was coached by nonprofits, documentaries, and service programs to believe it would be.

On paper I am, by most people’s standards, highly qualified to do international aid work. But I shouldn’t be.

You see, the work we were doing in both the DR and Tanzania was good. The orphanage needed a library so that they could be accredited to a higher level as a school, and the camp in the DR needed funding and supplies so that it could provide HIV+ children with programs integral to their mental and physical health. It wasn’t the work that was bad. It was me being there.

It turns out that I, a little white girl, am good at a lot of things. I am good at raising money, training volunteers, collecting items, coordinating programs, and telling stories. I am flexible, creative, and able to think on my feet. On paper I am, by most people’s standards, highly qualified to do international aid work. But I shouldn’t be.

I am not a teacher, a doctor, a carpenter, a scientist, an engineer, or any other professional that could provide concrete support and long-term solutions to communities in developing countries. I am a 5′4″ white girl who can carry bags of moderately heavy stuff, horse around with kids, attempt to teach a class, tell the story of how I found myself (with accompanying Powerpoint) to a few thousand people, and not much else.

Some might say that’s enough. That as long as I go to X country with an open mind and a good heart I’ll leave at least one child so uplifted and emboldened by my short stay that they will, for years, think of me every morning.

But I don’t want a little girl in Ghana, or Sri Lanka, or Indonesia to think of me when she wakes up each morning. I don’t want her to thank me for her education or medical care or new clothes. Even if I am providing the funds to get the ball rolling, I want her to think about her teacher, community leader, or mother. I want her to have a hero who she can relate to — who looks like her, is part of her culture, speaks her language, and who she might bump into on the way to school one morning.

Tying friendship bracelets during my first trip to the Dominican Republic in 2009.

After my first trip to the Dominican Republic, I pledged to myself that we would, one day, have a camp run and executed by Dominicans. Now, about seven years later, the camp director, program leaders, and all but a handful of counselors are Dominican. Each year we bring in a few Peace Corps volunteers and highly skilled volunteers from the USA who add value to our program, but they are not the ones in charge. I think we’re finally doing aid right, and I’m not there.

Before you sign up for a volunteer trip anywhere in the world this summer, consider whether you possess the skill set necessary for that trip to be successful. If yes, awesome. If not, it might be a good idea to reconsider your trip.

Sadly, taking part in international aid where you aren’t particularly helpful is not benign. It’s detrimental. It slows down positive growth and perpetuates the “white savior” complex that, for hundreds of years, has haunted both the countries we are trying to “save” and (more recently) our own psyches. Be smart about traveling and strive to be informed and culturally aware. It’s only through an understanding of the problems communities are facing, and the continued development of skills within that community, that long-term solutions will be created.

This post was originally published at Pippa Biddle and is reprinted here with permission.

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