Merry Farmer's Blog, page 3

Status Update – Worry

Yes, even this version of Merry was a worrier.

Okay, raise your hand if you’ve ever had a moment in life where worry suddenly (or not so suddenly) overwhelmed you. … Yeah, I’m pretty sure that everyone is raising their hand right now. I think worry is an unfortunately common part of being a human. Because we have so much to worry about!

Personally, I’m worried about money—because I had my taxes done yesterday and I owe so, so, so very much, and because there’s some drama with my financial advising—I’m worried about books and book deadlines and the fact that sales have been down at the time of year when they’re supposed to be up (it’s not just me, it’s across the board, and I have strong theories about why), and I’m worried about the state of our country, the high level of stress and conflict with people close and far, and where we’re going. So basically, I’m worried about all the standard, ordinary, normal things that people worry about: Money, Career, and The Future. I’m lucky I’m not in a relationship, or I’d be worrying about that too!

And that’s sort of the point. We all worry about the same things, more or less. I think if you asked any person anywhere to make a list of the top five categories of things they worry about, we’d all end up with the same five things, only in different orders. But what gets me is that in the midst of our own, personal worry, we always seem to think that we’re alone, that we’re the only one worried about those particular things.

I mean, how can I worry, knowing that I grew this one year? The Lord brings us miracles in the smallest and biggest ways!

Fortunately, we’re not. We’re all in the worry boat together. And as I deal with all of the things that are winding me up and stressing me out, I keep telling myself that. My worries about money seem big to me, but I will not have a problem getting through them. Other people might, and while that doesn’t invalidate the worry I feel, it puts things into perspective. Taxes slapped me upside the head this year, but I planned and prepared for it. Others might not be so lucky.

The same goes for my career. I am always going to be a writer, and I will always continue to write. The market may be down right now, due to outside forces, but those forces will resolve themselves and people will be more interested in reading than watching TV once there’s less drama to focus on. Not to mention that I have some super fun and exciting books coming down the line! Plus, it’s not like my catalog of books will get smaller. So that problem will resolve itself too.

As for the future of this country? If there’s one thing that being a historian has taught me, it’s that life, the universe, and everything goes on. Whatever state we’re in at any given point, it changes. That’s just the nature of the game. Also important to remember is that it’s not my job to worry about the big picture. I can do my little part, then leave it up to others, and ultimately the Big Guy upstairs.

So does that stop worry? Heck no! Of course not! *LOL* But it regulates the flow, so to speak. Although I may back off of the internet for the weekend. We’re never going to stop being worriers, but we are allowed to take vacations from worrying, if only for a moment here and there.

Status Update – Victoria: Episode 6

I know, I’m way behind on this and on the blog in general, but it’s been one of those weeks where everything suddenly piles on you at the same time. You know those weeks. I got three emails within 20 minutes on Tuesday night with important, nay, dire business stuff that I had to deal with. Fortunately, most of it is taken care of, and we can now sit back and talk about Victoria.

Read this book this winter. It’s chunky and academic

I’ve give episode 6 about an 80% on the accuracy scale. Pretty darn good! It’s historically accurate that Victoria had mixed feelings about finding out she was pregnant so soon after the wedding, but also that she kind of ignored it and ran off to do stuff anyhow. What I find interesting about the way the show portrayed that is how good of a job they did showing the “old school of thought” about pregnancy, as evidenced by Victoria’s mom, and the new ideas that were just beginning to emerge at that time. Because there WAS a huge change in thought about pregnancy and childbirth in the middle part of the 19th century. Ironically (or not, this is me we’re talking about) I just read a social history book about Europe since 1750 this winter, and there was a whole chapter dealing with changes in the way childbirth and childrearing was thought of. That’s a whole other blog post, but the gist is that people were healthier in general and medical science was (sloooooowly) advancing to more reasonable ways of treating women’s health issues.

But the main thing I wanted to talk about with this episode was the historical reality of the slow but definite transition of power from wild, young Victoria who had no idea what she was doing and had to rely on ministers to Albert subtly slipping in and influencing things. Because he did. And England was better off for it by far!

Incidentally, Robert Peel started the Metropolitain Police Force, which is why cops are called “Bobbies” over there.

Status Update – BIG

Big-sized stuff!

So! After all the discussion the other day, I stopped in at Costco on my way home from church yesterday, just to check it out. I went in as a guest, not intending to buy anything, just looking at what they have.

Well, two things became apparent to me pretty quickly. I *could* get a Costco membership so that I could get some of the things that, frankly, looked delicious that I can’t get anywhere else. I could get giant slabs of salmon that I could cut up and freeze, and they had some prepared chicken salad that looked good, some great cheeses, a few frozen thingies, and some snackie things. They have all the cleaning products I use, and I could basically buy them once a year and be good. But the more I walked around, the more I thought to myself “I can get these things anywhere.”

The other big thing I noticed—which is something I already know about Americans—is that Americans like things BIG. I mean B-I-G! It wasn’t just the giant shelves filled with emperor-sized bags of chips or tubs of salsa. It wasn’t just the massive TVs (for sale) that greet you when you walk into warehouse stores. It wasn’t even the huge carts people were wheeling around the stores. It was the gigantic trucks I saw in the parking lot. I ended up following one massive, monster truck out of the parking lot and down the road a little…and it had one person in it. Tiny cab, gigantic truck.

Just enough fish & chips (& mushy peas) to satisfy this weary traveler without wasting anything

So what is this fascination Americans have with largeness? Because when I was in London last summer, the “big” thing I noticed was that everything was small. Or rather, everything was to scale. The cars were compact and suitable for city driving (and I should note that even watching British TV, like, chat shows, not dramas, the cars out in the country are small too, unless they’re working farm vehicles). The portions of food at the modest-sized supermarkets were just right for consumption without waste, and same with the portions served at restaurants.

This is not a judgement of any kind, it’s just an observation about what appears to be a national character thing. I’ve always been told, too, for example, that in Paris, people shop for what they’re going to eat that day as opposed to making a trip to the grocery store to stock up for the week or longer. It seems to me to be a different philosophy of need and a different way of viewing what is necessary.

Now, I think part of the American way of thinking must come because in a lot of areas, that once every other week trip to Costco is all you’re going to get, since you live so far out in the middle of nowhere. Europe doesn’t have that many middles of nowhere left. But the Costco I went to yesterday was in suburban Philadelphia. You could drive through no more than two traffic lights in any direction and hit another supermarket. And you have to drive for a while before you hit remote country (although we have a lot of “nearby country” just outside of the suburbs). So the practical aspect of bulk shopping can’t be as important here as, say, having a huge family that eats a lot. But I dunno if that scenario applies to everyone either.

At the end of the day, I’ll be honest and say that the European “less is more” system is more appealing to me. That’s just the way I am. But then, as far back as college, I’ve been told—by Europeans—that I’m more British than most British people, and definitely more British than American. So at the end of the day, I think I’ll skip the bulk store membership and keep making my daily trips out to more local shops.

Status Update – Sam’s Club and Stuff

All the stuff!
Rusty Clark ~ 100K Photos, courtesy of Flickr

My friend and assistant, Julie, and I have this periodic discussion about stuff. People have a lot of stuff. We have a lot of stuff, but we’ve each, at various times and in our own ways, been trying to get rid of stuff. Julie turned me on to this documentary about minimalism, and I’ve been trying to implement some of those strategies in my life. Because I don’t really need all that much stuff.

But sometimes I really, really want the stuff!

The other thing Julie and I have discussed is how it doesn’t matter how much you have, somehow there’s always something else you want. I think it actually has a specific psychological term. It’s human nature. We think that if we get Widget A, our life will be complete and we’ll never want anything else again. So we get Widget A…and instantly we want Widget B. It’s just how things are. And I’ve done that over and over and over again.

Although I’ve gotten much better recently. I have a wonderful apartment, I have nice furniture, a Kitchen-Aid mixer, nice pots and pans that match, and a super cool, very sharp knife set. (You can see which room my priorities lie in). I’m not really a clothes or shoes or handbags kind of gal. Books, yes, but books are special. No, what I really want to spend my money on is travel. Which is probably why I’m going to Europe twice this year.

Sam’s Club by Mike Mozart of JeepersMedia and TheToyChannel on YouTube, courtesy of Flickr

Anyhow, lately, I’ve had an itch. It’s not for stuff per se, it’s for access to stuff. I keep thinking that I really need to get a membership to Sam’s Club. Now, I don’t have a huge family. I’m not running an organization. I’m just a single woman with two cats. But I did buy one of those vacuum seal food storage systems recently, and I feel like I should buy in bulk and then vacuum seal all the stuff! But do I really need to?

So here’s my question for you all. Should I bother getting a membership to Sam’s? Is it really a good deal to buy things like granola bars in bulk? Or would I actually end up buying foods that I could then suck and freeze so that I only have to go grocery shopping once a month? Would this make me spend less overall or more? Inquiring minds want to know!

Status Update – Kitten Progress

[image error]It seems inevitable that when I’m trying to get things done under a tight deadline and I need to focus, I have cat drama. Well, not cat drama in this case. It’s more like this baby kitten of mine is going through her terrible twos!

So for those who don’t know, I’ve had two cats, brother and sister, Torpedo and Butterfly, for twelve and a half years. They were born to me. But Butterfly passed away in December. So, not wanting Torpedo to be alone, and seeing that he was mourning the loss of his sister, I got Justine, who was just about 6 months old at the time, mid-December. And she was cute and adorable and very, very shy.

Well, she’s not shy anymore! She’s totally come out of her shell and keeps getting into everything. She dashes around the house, chasing everything that moves and half the stuff that doesn’t. Her latest obsession is zipper-pulls, so if I leave anything with a zipper lying around, she HAS to play with it. She’s taken to napping on the couch with me while I write too, but sometimes that means climbing up on my lap desk to get an up-close and personal look at my fingers.

Justine is a typical baby. She needs to play. The other day, she was zipping around so fast that I thought she and Torpedo were chasing each other. Until I noticed Torpedo napping in his usual spot. Justine was running around so fast that I thought she was two cats! She’s also at the stage now where if something is on a table, she’ll knock if off, and if there’s a surface she hasn’t explored, she’ll jump up to explore it.

[image error]The thing is, up until recently, Justine has annoyed the heck out of Torpedo. At twelve and a half, Torpedo really is an old man, and his world has just been severely rattled. He’s been growling at her and swiping and chasing her around to establish dominance. But no more! For the last week or so, he’s been eyeing her differently and sniffing her without growling or chasing.

Well, yesterday the day I’ve been waiting for came! The two of them sat down on one end of my couch together and napped. It wasn’t quite the cuddle-fest that Torpedo and Butterfly would have, but it was bonding. And to top it all off, Torpedo gave Justine a few good grooming licks. And that’s super important for cat behavior. Grooming means acceptance, and when one cat grooms another it’s a big deal.

I certainly think it’s a big deal. I know that Torpedo needs to feel bonded with another cat. And it makes me feel so much easier about all the travel I’ll be doing this coming year. I can go away knowing that they have each other.

Now Available – Trail of Passion Audiobook

Hey guys, guess what? Trail of Passion is now available as an audiobook! Yes, you too can listen to the amazing Dawnya Clarine reading all about Lucy Haskell and Gideon Faraday’s journey out to Wyoming on the Oregon Trail!

Better still, I have a limited amount of free audiobook codes from Audible! So the first ten people who comment on this post with their email address will get to listen for free! Let me know if you’d like me to hide the comment with your address after you leave it, and I’ll take care of that for you.

Status Update – Victoria: Episode 5

Man, I really do like this show! It’s been so much fun watching the way Jenna Coleman plays Victoria so, so well (although I still like the actor who played Albert in The Young Victoria much more than this guy). And once again, they got the major historical details of Albert having a really hard time adjusting and finding a place down pretty good.

I wonder, though, if 21st century audiences really appreciate how bad it really was for Albert. We have certain expectations about the equality between the sexes these days, but even with my History Apologist ways, I have to admit that the role of women compared to men was at a historical low in the 1840s. If he had married any other woman in the entire world, Albert would have expected to be a firm head of household. He would have exercised a certain amount of control and influence over his wife and children. His opinions would have been sacrosanct, and there would be no question that he would be taken very seriously. And Albert was a very serious man.

But Albert was in the unique to the 19th century of being number two in his marriage. As much as Victoria wanted it to be otherwise (and really did work for things like Albert’s right to take her into dinner, and having parliament give him the title of Prince Consort, which they didn’t until the 1850s). We know from letters and diaries that the stress that his unique and, for the time, humiliating position was acute. He really suffered for the first few years, until he figured out how to make a name and a place for himself. Which he did by taking up various charitable causes. I’m sure they’ll get into it later, but Albert gained a reputation for hard work and competence as an organizer and supporter of causes.

But the one thing that I call shenanigans on for this episode in the whole thing with Victoria trying not to have a baby right away. That’s sort of a modern spin on things, in my opinion. Victoria wasn’t thrilled about the prospect of pregnancy and children, but she knew it was inevitable. However, according to everything I’ve read, it seems like she didn’t really know how much she was going to hate it until she was already very pregnant with her first, Vicky. So I would believe the scene between her and Albert when he catches her jumping up and down after sexy times if she’d already had Vicky and knew what she was trying to prevent. Before that? I don’t think she knew.

Victoria & Albert were really *cough* active, though. And we know this because Victoria was the queen of TMI and pretty much told everyone what they were up to all the time. Also, one thing the show isn’t good at showing is that Victoria was really almost never alone. The scene where Lehzen walks in on the two of them in the morning and Victoria tells Albert that she sleeps in the room next door? True. Very true. Only there was a big hole in the wall (I imagine it being like a window, based on what I read) so that Victoria had very little privacy ever. I always did wonder how that worked, seeing as how much V&A “enjoyed” each other.

Anyhow, if I’m remembering correctly, Victoria was pregnant within two months of her wedding, so I’m interested to see how the show handles that.

This is one of my favorite paintings of Victoria & Albert because of how telling it is about Victoria’s attitude toward motherhood. V&A are obviously lovestruck, with eyes only for each other (and the painting is often cropped to show just this part). But way, way over on the other side of the canvas, playing with dead animals? That’s Vicky, their firstborn! And that says it all.

Status Update – Lady Jane’s Salon

Hmm… My hair was a little out of control…

Yesterday, hard on the heels of kicking that stupid cold I had last week (and strangely, I feel 95% better today, all of a sudden) I had my first book reading at The Cat’s Meow in Manheim, PA for the Lady Jane’s Salon group! It was a blast. Here’s a brief rundown of what it’s like to do a public reading…

First off, I was really nervous about coughing through the whole thing and how my voice would hold out. Because, let’s face it, when I get around other authors and book-lovers, I like to talk. A lot! And in the best of times it wears on my throat to the point of causing me to lose my voice. So I headed out with cold medicine and powerful lozenges in my purse, and I stopped for a warm beverage on the way there. That warm beverage actually did a ton of good!

Lady Jane’s is co-hosted by my friend and fellow writer, Holly Bush, had invited me to read, and I stopped by her house first. It was a trip down memory lane too, because Holly lives right near the Pennsylvania Renaissance Faire grounds, and, I don’t know if you know this, but I spent two summers when I was super young running around the Ren Faire, pretending I was an Elizabethan peasant (’92 & ’93). So I know that area and that drive very well! Good times, good times. I should write about the Ren Faire someday.

I love having the chance to explain why I write the things I write!

Anyhow, Holly and I got started on the mega-talking right away, before we even made it down to The Cat’s Meow. Co-host Megan Hart was there already, and the talking continued. We had a great crowd of people, including one of my mom’s childhood friends, who lives in the area. I got to sign books and give stuff away, which I always love doing.

Okay, so then I had to get up and read. Ha! I don’t usually like listening to my own books, whether on the audiobooks that I have professionally done or reading them aloud myself. But I had the added “bonus” of trying hard not to cough the whole time I was reading. And the actor in me always thinks back on it later and wonders if I read too fast, if I read a passage that was interesting enough, or if anyone listening is going to care one tiny bit about the words coming out of my mouth. But I think everyone enjoyed it.

Mostly, I love going to events like this one because I just love hanging out with readers and other writers and talking about books. How often do we writers get the chance to emerge from our writing caves to socialize with people? Not often! So I encourage everyone who has a book group near them and every writer who has a chance to go to something like this to jump on it. A good time was had by all!

Book Excerpt – Chaos Theory

It’s Sunday, I’m about to head off to Mannheim for a book reading (I’ll let you know all about it tomorrow!) so I figured this was a good time for another excerpt from Chaos Theory. And I hate to say it, but at this point, between me having a cold all last week and my assistant dealing with some stuff, it Chaos Theory probably won’t be released until maybe the very beginning of March. Alas, these things happen! But here’s a bit to see you through….

“Is this on?” he said into a microphone. “Not that I really need it if it isn’t.”

Everyone laughed. Chairs were turned so people could see Howie, and for a moment, the delicious meal was abandoned.

“Ladies and gentlemen,” Howie began. “I’d like to welcome you to PSF today to join us for this grand repast. Let’s have a round of applause for the excellent chefs of Haskell Catering.”

Applause filled the room. The head chef, a woman named Rebecca Standish, who Melody had known since childhood, nodded and smiled in appreciation.

“But, of course, you’re all here to find out what our spring mixer is all about,” Howie went on.

A buzz of excitement filled the large room. Melody grinned at Will. His mouth remained in a neutral line, but she could see the spark of interest in his eyes. Interest in more than one thing.

“Okay, okay,” Howie continued. “I know that it’s the worst-kept secret in town, but what you all don’t know is that we’re going to have a contest within a contest.”

That caught everyone’s attention, even nudging Melody’s focus away from Will and up to Howie.

“Our spring event is in association with Shoshone National Park and the National Park Services,” Howie went on. “And yes, we’re going to be having an orienteering competition.”

A ruble of enthusiasm filled the room. Howie smiled at it, but raised his hands for silence.

“So for those of you who don’t know—and at this point, I expect that’s about three of you—” Several people throughout the room laughed. “—orienteering is a survival game where people are blindfolded and dropped into the middle of the wilderness. Using only a compass and map, they’re challenged to find their way out, or find their way to a specific point.”

He paused so people could let that sink in. Melody found that her heart was thumping in excitement, half at the prospect of the challenge and half because the corners of Will’s mouth were inching up into what might actually be a smile.

“We’re going to be doing things a little differently,” Howie went on. “Since this is a mixer, rather than dropping you into the wilderness alone, we’re going to be pairing you up in teams, one person from town paired up with one person from Paradise Space Flight.”

It took Melody all of half a second to burn with the desire to have Will as her partner. He was exactly the man she wanted to get lost in the wilderness with.

“Furthermore,” Howie continued, “instead of just dropping you with a compass and map, in addition to those two things, we’ll be giving each team member a backpack full of preselected supplies. Some of them will be crucial tools for wilderness survival, and some will be….” He made a curious sound and tilted his head to the side. “Let’s just say they’ll be interesting.”

“Oh my gosh,” Rita whispered, making eye contact with Melody and Calliope. “Does Howie know about your game?”

Casey burst into snorting giggles. “Can you imagine the kind of stuff that would be in those backpacks if he does?”

“Now, in all honesty, the competition is meant for singles,” Howie went on, which only made the girls at Melody’s table giggle harder, as if he was confirming Rita’s suspicion. Will sent a frown Melody’s way, but she only winked at him. That caused Will to snap his eyes back to Howie. “We can make provision for any couples that want to take part, though. And you might find the competition within the competition to be just as enjoyable.”

Melody instantly stopped sniggering like a high school girl and sat straighter.

“As I mentioned,” Howie said, “this competition will take place at Shoshone National Forest. Well, Paradise Space Flight will be partnering them for an even grander enterprise as well. As you know, funding for the National Parks Service has been harder to come by lately, and our national parks have come under a certain level of attack. But Paradise Space Flight is dedicated to preserving and celebrating out natural heritage. Shoshone National Forest has been incredibly gracious to give us unprecedented access to their land. We, in turn, will be doing them a great service as well.”

He reached into his podium and held up a camera. “Each couple in the competition will be given a state of the art, professional quality digital camera. As you make your way through the wilderness, you will be responsible for taking photographs and videos of the natural splendor that Shoshone National Forest has to offer.”

A ripple of excitement and approval passed through the room. Melody exchanged a look with her sister that said photographing nature was right up their alley.

“So in addition to the prize for the couple to make it out of the forest and to the rendezvous point first, a second prize will be given to the couple who takes the best photographs, as judged by a panel of experts from PSF and the National Parks Service. Those winning photographs will be featured in a promotional video that PSF will be sponsoring to bring awareness to the glory of nature and hopefully to encourage donations.”

Status Update – Yep, Still Sick

Breaking out the big guns!

Ah, yes! I remember back on Tuesday night when I looked up the stages of a cold, only to learn that days 3 and 4 were the worst, and that most colds last 7-10 days. There was a time when I could kick a cold in five days, but alas, those days are not now. Yep, I’m still sick. But I am beginning to see the light. I’ve passed on from the run-down, thick-headed phase, but now I’m in my absolute least favorite stage of a cold—I’m coughing.

My extreme hatred of coughing goes back about fifteen years, to when I had bronchitis. Man, I never want to be that sick again! I’d never experienced anything like it before, and I never want to feel that way again. I never realized how accurate a description the phrase “coughing up a lung” was until that point. And maybe it’s a myth, but I’ve always heard that once you’ve had bronchitis, your lungs will never be the same again.

Well, it certainly feels that way now! I hate coughing. But as much as I hate it, I am endlessly impressed by how well cold medicine works! Back when I had bronchitis, the only thing that made me feel slightly human was Delsym. Dude, that stuff rocks! So I always keep some on hand. But the problem is, it’s so strong that you can only take it once every 12 hours. So I had the whole debate this morning between Delsym or regular cold medicine. Of course, the regular stuff has the active ingredient in Delsym in it, so there’s that.

In the end (because I know you’re desperate to know about the outcome of this dilemma) I went for the regular cough medicine. I’m hoping it will dry out my sinuses and ease the inflammation in my upper respiratory system, so maybe I won’t have to worry about coughing. So far, so good.

But also, I’ve discovered that steam really helps me not to cough as much. Props to my writer buddy, Caroline Lee, for cluing me in to that one! I think I might go out and buy a humidifier today so I don’t have to keep running the shower and boiling water. Especially since I just noticed this going on with the pot of water I boiled earlier. *shakes head* Kitten!