Dylan Charles's Blog, page 31

A Break from the Fear

I've been staring at this story for about twenty minutes now and so far I have nothing. I know exactly where this story is going to go. I know what's supposed to happen and when things are going to happen. A will follow B which will lead to C and then comes D.

I know exactly what I need to write. I'm just not so sure how to write it. I don't know the proper words. I don't know the pace. Nothing is really coming that easily.

Truth be told, that's how the blog has been feeling lately. Probably...

Countdown

The Rock and Shock horror convention is fast approaching and my anticipation levels are near manic levels. There's only one more week left and it's entirely possible that I might explode before then.

I've never been to any kind of convention before. I have only a very loose idea of what to expect. I don't know what the fans are going to be like. Are there going to be costumes? Will the guests reveal that they haven't been acting at all and go on a murder spree through the convention hall...

Distraction

I have this blog entry to write. I also have a story to write. And a review. I should also be editing my second book.

But

Instead I ended up watching X-Men: First Class. And looking at cute cat pictures on CuteOverload. And playing tower defense games.

I've never been good at avoiding distractions. Instead, I run toward them, my arms outstretched, ready and willing to avoid any work that I might have to do.

If it's productive, then I want nothing to do with it. It doesn't matter if I enjoy doing ...

The Search

I'm always searching for what I think might be the worst movie ever made. It has to fulfill a number of criteria to qualify.

1. It has to be offensive. It can't just be poorly made, with bad lighting and bad acting. It needs to offend me on some level. If I'm not angry by the end, then it doesn't count.

2. It needs to be poorly made. As bad as say, Battlefield Earth is, it's not badly made. It's got some visuals to it, by golly. If it's going to qualify as the worst movie ever, it needs to...

Quitting Quitting is for Quitters

There are times when it's difficult for me to stay away from cigarettes. Any stress, like from closing down a chain of bookstores, can trigger the desire to smoke. It's like having an itch I can't scratch, right between my shoulder blades, that just won't go away. It's an ever present tickle and though I can get close to scratching it, I always manage to miss the one spot that would really satisfy it.

It's at times like those that I need to remember why I'm glad I quit as opposed to really...

The Process

In order to get myself hyped about writing reviews again, I'm going to let ya'll in on a behind-the-scenes look at the process I use when writing reviews. It's also a good way to get two blog entries out of one movie.

1. First, I pick the movie. This involves going through the collection of horror movies available on Netflix. I flip through the list until I read a plot synopsis that makes me wince. This week's selection is Hanger, a movie about an abortion gone wrong. Quality!

2. Next, I watch ...

In the Spirit

So far I haven't really been feeling Halloween so much.

I've watched an obscene number of horror movies. I've consumed a large amount of pumpkin flavored beer. I've contemplated costumes. I've read articles online reviewing Halloween goodies. I've listened to Halloween music. Emily even got me a mess of rubbery stretchy spiders.

And nothing.

Partly, it's trying to sustain Halloween cheer for three months straight, which is getting to be more and more difficult. Partly, it's because it does't...

Human Centipede: Why?

I'm going to talk about horror movies (again), but this will be the last time for a day or two (promise {maybe}). This Friday, The Human Centipede 2 will be on limited release. So, if you're very, very lucky, it'll be playing somewhere in your city.

For years, if a critic wanted to point out the depravity of horror, they'd gesture wildly at the Saw series. Saw's position as King of Disgusting Horror has been soundly usurped by The Human Centipede. It's a movie so shocking that the director...

Hellraiser: A Review of Most of the Series

I've only watched six of the nine available Hellraiser movies and I've only seen them all once, so I don't consider myself any kind of expert. But after watching four of these movies in a three day period, I figure I've earned the right to vent a little bit.

The first Hellraiser movie was a great horror movie. It brought a new mythos to the table and broke free of the more standard horror movies that were being pumped out during the '80s. It took its time and built up an atmosphere. And then k...

Tales of the Whispering Mad and the Mis-Dead: Now in Paperback!

You may remember that I have a book, which is available on the Kindle.

Now, everytime I tell people that I have a book and it's only on the Kindle, they tell me, "But I don't have a Kindle." To which I respond, "Then buy a Kindle and then buy my book!" This never goes over well.

So! I've come up with a solution. You can now buy my book IN PAPERBACK. No ereaders required, you just go online, order the book and it arrives in the mail, in paper form. Truly, a miracle in modern technology.

Go HERE