Michael Allen's Blog: Michael Allen Online, page 12

Nudity In Hollywood Is Reaching New Levels

We’re not talking about adult films with all their nudity that really should stop trying to class up the joint with lines and acting. These are films and television shows that you can find on Netflix or Hulu that are flashing all the junk without any hesitation.

Hollywood has changed quite a bit. There used to be laws governing the nudity in films and television shows. It went pretty much like this. In films, the nudity had to be modest. Boobs and butt were about all you could expect to see. And for television, it was a no until HBO came along in the 70s.

But that has changed. Hollywood is a brave new world and they are showing everything now. In No Hard Feelings, Jennifer Lawrence walks across the beach totally naked and beats the crap out of kids who are trying to take her clothes. She is literally showing everything and she even body slams one of the guys. It is hilarious because it’s totally unexpected, but wow! What were the negotiations like when they were talking to Jennifer about this level of nudity?

I haven’t seen the scenes yet, but Poor Things is getting standing ovations for the sex it offers. Of course, Emma Stone does have to act like an awkward person because she was brought back to life after committing suicide. She returns naive and in the trailer, even the way she walks is strange. So, imagine the sex scenes having that same awkward motion. Plus, reviewers who have been blessed with watching the movie before its official release are going crazy over how wild it is.

I got into The Righteous Gemstones because it makes fun of all the stereotypes of the fake religious family who is making a fortune and building an empire. But wow! All the penis in the show. I don’t know what it’s trying to say, that penis is funny or just trying to make a statement that there isn’t enough male nudity in shows. But now I know what it’s like when females complain about all the Dick Pics they get in their inbox. Just like them, they didn’t ask and they didn’t want Dick Pics in their faces every day when they are simply trying to enjoy some social media. Here I am, trying to watch a show and smack, the penis slaps the screen and I’m not trying to see all that. Who is?

I’m trying to catch up on Killing It and there it is again. Craig is forced to live in a gym in Season 1 Episode 3 because of his dire circumstances and while he’s on the phone with his daughter, a guy drops his change. It’s a lot of it. Probably a couple of dollars. So, he gets down on the floor to pick up his money. The problem is, he doesn’t have any underwear on, not even a towel around his waist. There I am with butthole and penis in my face again. If this is any indication how the show is going to go, I have a feeling it might turn into another The Righteous Gemstones.

It’s about time we dropped all of our inhibitions about nudity and sex. But I hope people keep wearing clothes in public. We don’t need that much nudity.

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Spotlight On Terann Hilow And Vengeance Bikinis

What would it be like to own your own Luxury Swimwear line and be able to model them yourself? That’s what Terann Hilow does and she does a great job at it.

One look at the Terann Hilow Instagram, and what you might see at first is a gorgeous model with 235K followers growing by the day. But there’s more to the story. The pictures of her in bikinis are her own because she’s the owner, designer, and maker of Vengeance Bikinis, and they are handmade in the U.S.

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She has a huge assortment of bikinis, and they all look great on her. There is no guarantee that they will look the same on you, but I’m willing to bet if you bought a few, you would look great in them in your own way.

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It appears that she has bikinis she has designed for chores such as taking the trash out. This is just about the best promotion for a bikini that I have ever seen, and I would put Terann Hilow on the level of genius because who wouldn’t buy this one after watching her walk around in it?

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With her bikini promotions also comes inspiration every once in a while. What good is an entrepreneur, a go-getter, if she can’t inspire the same greatness out of others? “They asked her how’d you get so fly? She said from not being afraid to fall out the sky.”

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Exercise is one way to stay so fly. It should be done regularly. Every day is what it might take to have a body like hers, but several times a week is recommended at the minimum. To be honest, I need to get back into that. It’s a good thing and I’ve put it off long enough. See, she inspired me!

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Her bikinis have the right amount of variety that anyone should be able to enjoy. Whether you’re going swimming or you just want to sit on a wall while a photographer captures you in your best light.

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Kicked In The Nuts: Pranks That Go Too Far

Kicked in the Nuts was huge back in the day because a guy with an orange wig ran up to random people and actually kicked them in the nuts. The program made its point, but it didn’t make it good enough.

Mike and Patrick Henry are brothers who were behind the Kicked in the Nuts prank show. They actually walked into a Hollywood meeting, and the top execs thought it would be a great idea to prank people in extreme ways. They had the premise that people would be forgiving just because they were on a hidden camera show, even if it caused them great harm.

This was back in the early 2000s, and the Henry brothers looked at each other thinking the same thing. They knew these execs had lost their marbles. They were definitely assholes, that’s for sure. But the Henry brothers got a great idea out of it. They would end up setting up a prank show that was on a hidden camera. Only no one actually ever got kicked in the nuts. The prank was on the viewers.

It really was ridiculous when you think about it. But viewers believed it without a doubt. Mike Henry would run up to people looking like a clown and just randomly kicked them in the nuts with everything he had. They would fall in pain, and some guys would look like they were about to fight. But then, Mike would say, “Hey, my friend. You just got kicked in the nuts.” Then, he’d point at the camera.

That would change everything. Looks of anger became smiles. They’d laugh and hug. It was hilarious. A prank show on prank shows. Even though it proved its point, it didn’t stop anyone from doing increasingly more dangerous pranks. The thing is that these pranks that go too far are never at the expense of the prankster. It’s always at the expense of the unsuspecting victim, and there is very real danger involved.

Just to be real about it for a moment, they are some real dumbasses. That’s what the Henry brothers were trying to say way back then. Why didn’t anyone listen? Do it for the likes.

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What Does iPhone 15 Have To Do To Beat iPhone 14?

How much better can a phone get when it has everything a person could possibly need? We’re about to find out with the iPhone 15 because it’s about to come out and then we’ll know what we’ve been missing all along.

The phone was invented to make phone calls so that we didn’t have to run down the street to show our neighbors what we were having for dinner. Dial a few simple numbers and it would ring. Then, they would pick up and it was like they were right in the room.

Well, we did that for a while. Phone calls were the next best thing after clothing and alcohol. Those inventors had great imaginations back then. They came up with great stuff like air conditioning and umbrellas, the small ones you put in drinks. But the phone was a big deal and there was no way it was going to get any better.

Then, they started adding features. First, they unhooked the receiver from the base so that people could walk around their houses talking to each other. Then, they unhooked them from the wall, period, so that kids could walk around town and talk on them all day.

But what’s talking? The phone was made for so much more than that. It was made for a level of communication that doesn’t require talking. And just like the Swiss Army Knife, we saw the potential to turn the phone into so much more than something that simply makes phone calls. What a waste!

Years later, we have the iPhone 15 about to come out. Not only can it hold every app known throughout the galaxy but it does so much more than that. It can read your mind and order things from Amazon before you know you need them. It can contact a select few of your friends and let them know that you’d like to sit around looking at your phones together. It’s an amazing device.

Seriously though, I think we’ve done about all we can do with phones. Of course, the geniuses at the Apple store will prove me wrong but I don’t personally need them to do anything else. The solutions in this parody would work for me though.

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Andrew Trail Is Blowing Up For Mugshot

Andrew Trail may not like the way he’s blowing up but he’s becoming internet famous about right now. Who knows? It might turn out good for him just like it has in the past.

Andrew Trail was booked into Kanawha, West Virginia with a charge of Home Confinement Violation. No big deal. He did something prior and must have been put on house arrest. He got cabin fever and decided to leave the house. Maybe he had good reason. Who knows?

Well, he’s getting some love from the internet for his mugshot. It reminds me of Jeremy Meeks when his mugshot hit the internet in 2016. He became an overnight sensation. Sometimes, people don’t care what you might have done. They see that mugshot and they’re ready to start writing letters, hoping they make it to the inmate.

Jeremy Meeks is now a model sitting on about $5 million. His mugshot going famous didn’t hurt him at all. Not in any way.

So, Andrew Trail could be the next. By the time he comes out, he might have some modeling agencies contacting him to see if he’d like a career in modeling. At the very least, he might get some marriage proposals. They like him that much.

Those are just the comments on his mugshot page. Some girls on Facebook are already talking about their intentions.

Samantha Jo: He and I will be on the next season of “Love After Lockup”

Nikki Anderson: it’s not his fault that he looks THAT good in orange!

Kristi Engfurtner Dykes: Oh he got a dimple and errything. Dimple and lawyer debt

Alison Cooke Parker: I ain’t gonna lie here…he’s pretty

Debbie Smith: Um, he can serve house arrest at my house

I’m sure he could. This guy might be very surprised by the time he comes out of jail. He already has a fan club and that’s all it takes to get famous these days.

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Shaquille O’Neal And Kobe Bryant On The Court

Everyone’s debating who is the best in the NBA from yesterday to today, mainly Michael Jordan and LeBron James. But don’t ever forget how dominating the Shaquille O’Neal and Kobe Bryant team was when they played together.

They had phenomenal careers in the NBA. They became superstars even after their time and they finally decided to retire. Shaquille O’Neal has four championship rings while Kobe Bryant went on to win one more. Shaquille O’Neal’s net worth is in the $400 million range while Kobe Bryant’s was in the $600 million range before his death in 2020.

That was one hell of a year for us, wasn’t it? We started with murder hornets and ended up with Covid that locked us all down and made the world come to a screeching halt. Then one day, we hear the news that Kobe had died with his daughter, Gianna, along with John and Keri Altobelli with daughter, Alyssa, Payton and mother, Sarah Chester, as well as Christina Mauser and the pilot, Ara Zobayan.

We thought we had heard the worst and we had no idea that 2020 had no plans of getting any better!

Fans can argue basketball all they want and my favorite is Michael Jordan, although I don’t have a bad thing to say about LeBron James. That man dominates the court and has done some amazing things out there, including being the highest scorer of all time. So, who is bad-mouthing either one of those GOATS?

But when you watch how Shaquille O’Neal and Kobe Bryant played the game, you’ll realize the level of game that has to be played to win. That just might stop you from talking about any NBA player who’s out there making a name for themselves.

I know one thing that will change your mind. It’s this clip combination right here and it shows how awesome they were together.

Shaq and Kobe Bryant showing how it's done! pic.twitter.com/j1j9k9YGNG

— Michael Allen (@UncleMikeAllen) August 31, 2023

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Joe Rogan And Oliver Anthony Joking About Millionaires Bashing Billionaires

Oliver Anthony is blowing up and everyone wants to be a part of it. Talking to Joe Rogan who can relate to what he’s talking about, the latest sensation went into everything that’s going on in his new life and they touched on the hilarious occurrence when millionaires bash billionaires for not being able to relate.

Oliver Anthony has been in the spotlight now for a few weeks at the most because his song “Rich Men North of Richmond” blew up from out of nowhere. Just a simple musician with a microphone, a guitar, and a camera playing his song with his dogs running around him, wondering what was going on. But that song became a hit overnight and so did he.

Now, he’s being invited everywhere. His simple life on his land in Virginia is over because he has performances and appearances that are dominating his schedule. The latest was his appearance on Joe Rogan Experience and the two of them had a great time talking because while Oliver Anthony is adjusting to this new life, Joe Rogan has lived it and he’s offering good advice to the musician who’s currently sitting at No. 1.

But this clip is funny when Joe talks about “Dwight” from The Office. Joe didn’t even take the time to look up that the man’s name is Riann Wilson but talked about the comments he made recently that bashed billionaires a bit.

Joe Rogan: “there’s nothing funnier than millionaires pretending billionaires are out of touch. Take one of these Hollywood millionaires to West Virginia, take them to those coal mining countries, take them to those places in Appalachia where people have extreme poverty.”… pic.twitter.com/GNuHOAnPY7

— Travis (@Travis_in_Flint) August 30, 2023

You might want to watch the whole thing though because from the start, it’s very good. Talk about misinformation. People made fake memes of Oliver Anthony five minutes after he started blowing up.

He talks about how trolls started ripping off a shirt he was wearing to support a veteran organization. That’s the world for you. When you try to do something right, some troll will come along to try to capitalize on it rather than trying to do something awesome themselves.

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Why Don’t Teachers Get Paid As Much As Athletes?

I have often heard the debate where people have honestly asked why teachers don’t make as much money as professional football players or basketball players. Of course, that extends to all celebrities because there is a little feature in economics that makes this happen.

Of course, if anyone was really that concerned about it, all they would have to do is reset their priorities. Let’s explore how it would be possible for teachers to make the money that celebrities make because, as we all know, their job is just as important, if not more.

It would begin with everyone in the local community visiting their favorite school or as many as they would like and giving the secretary money. They can do that every payday or once a week. It’s up to them as long as they do it regularly so that the money can be given out to the teachers every month or twice a month as bonuses. That way, they could live in million-dollar mansions and drive half-a-million-dollar cars just like celebrities.

Of course, that would mean, in this opposite world, that the athletes would then have to apply for a job to as many sports teams as they need until they are finally hired. The teams would be supported by the local government, and the athletes would have a salary. There would also be a discretionary fund for activities beyond the scope of their normal duties, but it wouldn’t be much. The government likes taking money, but it’s not a fan of giving it back out.

So, for equipment and uniforms, they could do fundraisers like have a bake sale or sell hoagies. Those are always good for a little extra money. Crowdfunding has exploded as a feasible way to make extra money that the athletes might need. Of course, they can always come out of pocket and fund some of these things on their own, like gas for the bus to take them out of town for away games.

No one’s trying to give them a free ride here. They’re going to have to come up with some creative ways to raise the money they need in order to do their jobs. One good idea is if these athletes know a teacher they can invite to a fundraiser dinner. That would be special. If the teacher could give a speech and possibly even sign autographs for a little extra cash, they’d definitely make that money and might even be able to buy a new pair of shoes.

But as we all know, that’s not how our priorities are set. Teachers often have to come out of their pockets for supplies their students might need, and they do it with grace because, after all, being a teacher takes a certain type of giving spirit, and that’s why they are who they are. Teachers do appreciate when parents help out, but honestly, just a word of encouragement every once in a while can make a teacher’s day.

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The Kangaroo Kick Is Turning The Internet Upside Down

Maxwell Jacob Friedman showed up at AEW and gave the world a show. His Kangaroo Kick is all the rage and I’m going to try to start a new phrase. He’s “turning the internet upside down.”

Remember when they used to say she “broke the internet.” I never really got it because the internet was still there. It was still working. I think someone came up with it to describe Kim Kardashian. There was a picture of her pouring champagne into a glass on her butt if I’m remembering things right.

via Paper

Of course, she stopped a lot of people from doing what they were doing because they had to gawk at that picture. So, the internet was at a standstill. That could be said. No one was doing anything else because every jaw dropped. There was drool, so much drool. And that’s a fair way of putting it. She put the internet on halt. It just doesn’t have the same gusto as saying, she broke the internet.

When MJF dropped his Kangaroo Kick, he turned the internet upside down. The internet didn’t stop. It’s not broken. It survived and it’s still going. But the fact is that his fans are going crazy. And there’s something else about this clip, too.

He’s on something, right? He got a hold of some good stuff or something’s going on there. Maybe he had a few extra Red Bulls, but he’s lit. He has energy surging through his veins, coming out of his eyes. That’s just too much for me. I got tired just watching it. That was my exercise for the day, just watching this video clip.

Look at those eyes! If it were just the picture to take completely out of context and not the video to go with it to show the Kangaroo Kick, what would you think he’s about to do? Is he a serial killer or something? Is he at a party about to do the keg stand for the fifth time in a row? Whatever it is, there are no good intentions in those eyes.

MJF HIT THE KANGAROO KICK!!!! This man is a SUPERSTAR in Wembley. pic.twitter.com/NAC6aNqVm3

— Faya (@BHearns27) August 27, 2023

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Parkour Runner Almost Loses His Life Falling From High Rise

Parkour is exciting to watch and it’s amazing when the absolute lunatic jumping from high place to high place actually knows what they’re doing. The problem is that even the most seasoned expert can get it wrong sometimes and it can be deadly.

Sometimes, it’s not so bad. Parkour athletes might run through the streets and jump over concrete planters before hopping to the handrail on steps, and then flipping to the ground where they roll and then take off running again. Of course, they can get hurt. They can end up with a concussion. But as far as Parkour is concerned, there is minimal risk when on the ground.

Try jumping around when you’re 12 stories in the air. That’s when everything changes. When you’re high enough to need a parachute in case you fall, that’s the maximum amount of risk these crazy headcases can take. That’s risking falling to your death and it has happened.

It’s sad to hear about an athlete who was challenging themselves to be the best they could be but they made a misstep. It’s even worse when it’s on video for everyone to watch. Places like Worldstar will show the awful tragedy while platforms like YouTube will yank it down for being too violent.

In this case, the guy is looking down from the top of this high rise and he shows where he plans on running. You can see the street below and how far he has to fall if he doesn’t do it right. This is the kind of Parkour that can make your sphincter pucker, otherwise known as the Pucker Factor. Everyone knows what that is because it’s hard to control it. It’s a natural reaction that takes place when we see something dangerous and it’s like we’re putting ourselves in that danger.

The Parkour Pucker Factor

Parkour runner misses his jump and falls off a high rise rooftop pic.twitter.com/z5PfKgYnqd

— Crazy Clips (@crazyclipsonly) August 26, 2023

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