S.Z. Estavillo's Blog, page 6
April 22, 2024
Setting Boundaries On Social Media For Our Mental Health
The beauty of most social media platforms is that you can mute phrases and words, so the same kind of posts don’t keep showing up in my timeline. There are pros and cons of following people in the #writingcommunity. Some you will call your tribe, and some just aren’t. The reason for the divide is that there are people who are in certain cliques depending on their publishing avenue. One of the great features of X is the ability to mute specific phrases and words, allowing you to control the content that appears on your timeline. There will be posts from fellow writers that may resonate with you, contributing to your tribe, while others may not. This distinction often stems from the different publishing avenues they are associated with.
This is just a fact.
So, while I love so many writer announcements flooding X lately, I’m choosing to mute certain key phrases for my mental health. Not because I’m not happy for them but because social media is a double-edged sword. It tempts us to compare our wins against those of other people. It lures some into elitist cliques that are not inclusive. You either have bragging rights in your bio, or you don’t. At the end of the day, we should only be focusing on our own path. This can be a challenge when timelines are constantly flooded—bombarded even—by what other people are doing.
I am a huge mental health advocate. I am also a professional content strategist and marketing professional by day. So, as one, I can understand the power behind marketing ourselves and promoting our wins. But at the end of the day, we’re not robots. It’s hard not to compare our houses, cars, book deals, “I got an agent” vs. non-agented, indie vs. traditional, and so on when the X algorithm keeps showing us the same stuff that matches our interests. It can actually be taxing. I am a huge advocate for being proud of ourselves. But at the same time, it’s okay to prioritize our own mental health. It is not selfish to mute accounts or even announcements.
We can be happy for people at a distance while also first realizing that we must champion our own journey. We can’t do that by looking to the right and the left. When we feel forced into unhealthy comparisons, we allow our joy to be stolen. The only way to protect yourself from unhealthy activity on social media is to set boundaries for yourself. Boundaries aren’t selfish. Boundaries aren’t jealousy. You can set boundaries and still be happy for others.
Setting boundaries by muting accounts and keywords or even taking social media breaks means valuing ourselves. It is about loving ourselves enough to put ourselves first. It is respecting our sanity, peace of mind, and our personal goals. It is ensuring that we aren’t comparing ourselves to other people. The best thing we can do for ourselves as aspiring authors and writers at all levels is to acknowledge how easy it is to compare ourselves to others, especially in the publishing world, and how quickly that can sink us into depression.
You are on your journey, and I am on mine. We can champion others but realize we must first respect our mental health, and that means setting boundaries in terms of what we want to see and constantly read on our timeline. If someone muted my publishing announcement, I wouldn’t be offended at all. Because as someone who deals with lifelong depression, anxiety, and insomnia—I totally get it. It reminds me when I was struggling with secondary infertility and there were secondary infertility support groups where those in the group couldn't handle pregnancy announcements after all of their miscarriages. I myself had 16 non-viable pregnancies before I successfully had my son. So, a writer facing a ton of rejections and then seeing agented announcements flooding their social media feed can be triggering to them.
I'm the first one to say that we need to celebrate our wins and not minimize them. But on the flip side, we have to set boundaries for ourselves. As someone who had an agent and no longer has one, I am also allowed to feel complex emotions when bombarded by such announcements. Everyone expects us to be subhuman and gleeful all the time when it comes to everyone else’s positive news. But, the amount of rejection by writers receive is not even at normal levels. We are allowed to admit that rejection hurts. We are allowed to admit that seeing repeated announcements is a tad annoying, and we are allowed to do whatever it is that we need to do to protect our sanity.
Social media puts everything in our faces, and that can sometimes be harmful. Whether we realize that immediately or not.
The bottom line? No, this isn't hating on people's joy. No, this isn't asking people not to be happy when they win. There isn’t anything wrong with filtering your content on social media. Sometimes, the best thing we can do in terms of social media and mental health management is to understand our triggers and to work accordingly to set digital boundaries out of respect for mental health.
This is just a fact.
So, while I love so many writer announcements flooding X lately, I’m choosing to mute certain key phrases for my mental health. Not because I’m not happy for them but because social media is a double-edged sword. It tempts us to compare our wins against those of other people. It lures some into elitist cliques that are not inclusive. You either have bragging rights in your bio, or you don’t. At the end of the day, we should only be focusing on our own path. This can be a challenge when timelines are constantly flooded—bombarded even—by what other people are doing.
I am a huge mental health advocate. I am also a professional content strategist and marketing professional by day. So, as one, I can understand the power behind marketing ourselves and promoting our wins. But at the end of the day, we’re not robots. It’s hard not to compare our houses, cars, book deals, “I got an agent” vs. non-agented, indie vs. traditional, and so on when the X algorithm keeps showing us the same stuff that matches our interests. It can actually be taxing. I am a huge advocate for being proud of ourselves. But at the same time, it’s okay to prioritize our own mental health. It is not selfish to mute accounts or even announcements.
We can be happy for people at a distance while also first realizing that we must champion our own journey. We can’t do that by looking to the right and the left. When we feel forced into unhealthy comparisons, we allow our joy to be stolen. The only way to protect yourself from unhealthy activity on social media is to set boundaries for yourself. Boundaries aren’t selfish. Boundaries aren’t jealousy. You can set boundaries and still be happy for others.
Setting boundaries by muting accounts and keywords or even taking social media breaks means valuing ourselves. It is about loving ourselves enough to put ourselves first. It is respecting our sanity, peace of mind, and our personal goals. It is ensuring that we aren’t comparing ourselves to other people. The best thing we can do for ourselves as aspiring authors and writers at all levels is to acknowledge how easy it is to compare ourselves to others, especially in the publishing world, and how quickly that can sink us into depression.
You are on your journey, and I am on mine. We can champion others but realize we must first respect our mental health, and that means setting boundaries in terms of what we want to see and constantly read on our timeline. If someone muted my publishing announcement, I wouldn’t be offended at all. Because as someone who deals with lifelong depression, anxiety, and insomnia—I totally get it. It reminds me when I was struggling with secondary infertility and there were secondary infertility support groups where those in the group couldn't handle pregnancy announcements after all of their miscarriages. I myself had 16 non-viable pregnancies before I successfully had my son. So, a writer facing a ton of rejections and then seeing agented announcements flooding their social media feed can be triggering to them.
I'm the first one to say that we need to celebrate our wins and not minimize them. But on the flip side, we have to set boundaries for ourselves. As someone who had an agent and no longer has one, I am also allowed to feel complex emotions when bombarded by such announcements. Everyone expects us to be subhuman and gleeful all the time when it comes to everyone else’s positive news. But, the amount of rejection by writers receive is not even at normal levels. We are allowed to admit that rejection hurts. We are allowed to admit that seeing repeated announcements is a tad annoying, and we are allowed to do whatever it is that we need to do to protect our sanity.
Social media puts everything in our faces, and that can sometimes be harmful. Whether we realize that immediately or not.
The bottom line? No, this isn't hating on people's joy. No, this isn't asking people not to be happy when they win. There isn’t anything wrong with filtering your content on social media. Sometimes, the best thing we can do in terms of social media and mental health management is to understand our triggers and to work accordingly to set digital boundaries out of respect for mental health.
April 19, 2024
Why We Shouldn't Minimize Our Wins
The publishing industry is full of hurdles, so each step in the process can be a challenge. Drafting is hardly the challenge; rather, it's the number of revisions that come after between beta reader or editor notes.
Regardless of our struggles, it's important to count our wins instead of minimizing them. When I spoke with my therapist today, I told her about my book deal. I hadn't realized how I came across when I said, "Well, it's through a small press." She told me she would not allow me to minimize my win and reminded me that it's a big win to get a 3-book deal regardless.
The publishing industry often feels like there are cliques and a club mentality. There is the "repped by..." club. Those who have agents can proudly flaunt that in their bio. I know what that's like because I was once there. There are the Big 5 book deals that are a whole other club. When switching agents or venturing out on your own through a small press, there's a sense that we're no longer a part of that elite clique. It can feel discouraging. There's a sense of isolation and rejection. This is especially true when transitioning between agents or no longer having one.
There was a time when I had an agent for 5 years, and despite our efforts, 4 of my books never got picked up by the major publishers. We parted ways amicably, without a book deal. It was a disheartening experience. But, I also gained invaluable lessons. I learned how to collaborate with an agent. I learned how to accept editorial feedback. I even honed my skills by providing editorial notes to agents at literary agencies. Walking away without a book deal and seeing the end of a 5-year relationship was tough, but it didn't break me.
I felt like I had failed and sunk into a deep depression, but I continued trying on my own. Then, just three months out on my own, I locked in a three-book deal through a small press all by myself. No, I was no longer in the "repped by" club. No, I was not in the "Big 5" club either. But I found a whole new community of indie/small press authors who embraced me, congratulated me, and celebrated my win.
When my therapist emphasized the significance of my 3-book deal, without the 'small press' qualifier, it was a revelation. Two of the books in the acquired series were supposed to "die on sub" until the editor at my publisher saw something great in my work. I hadn't even realized I was downplaying my achievement until my therapist pointed it out. It made me understand that we often undermine our own successes. We need to learn to celebrate our victories without adding the 'but...' A win is a win. We might not be part of certain cliques or clubs, and that's perfectly fine. We must carve our own path and discover our own community.
If you haven't heard this in a while, I'll tell you. You are good enough. Your stories are good enough. Be proud of your accomplishments, from finishing that first draft to revision rounds and our aspirations toward publication. When you put yourself out there, it can be the most naked feeling. But someone out there wants to read your book, and if you're feeling discouraged by the insurmountable levels of rejection. Never ever let it define you. Never ever let it stop you from reaching your goals. Never ever let industry clubs and cliques reduce your wins.
Celebrate your victories because you deserve it.
Regardless of our struggles, it's important to count our wins instead of minimizing them. When I spoke with my therapist today, I told her about my book deal. I hadn't realized how I came across when I said, "Well, it's through a small press." She told me she would not allow me to minimize my win and reminded me that it's a big win to get a 3-book deal regardless.
The publishing industry often feels like there are cliques and a club mentality. There is the "repped by..." club. Those who have agents can proudly flaunt that in their bio. I know what that's like because I was once there. There are the Big 5 book deals that are a whole other club. When switching agents or venturing out on your own through a small press, there's a sense that we're no longer a part of that elite clique. It can feel discouraging. There's a sense of isolation and rejection. This is especially true when transitioning between agents or no longer having one.
There was a time when I had an agent for 5 years, and despite our efforts, 4 of my books never got picked up by the major publishers. We parted ways amicably, without a book deal. It was a disheartening experience. But, I also gained invaluable lessons. I learned how to collaborate with an agent. I learned how to accept editorial feedback. I even honed my skills by providing editorial notes to agents at literary agencies. Walking away without a book deal and seeing the end of a 5-year relationship was tough, but it didn't break me.
I felt like I had failed and sunk into a deep depression, but I continued trying on my own. Then, just three months out on my own, I locked in a three-book deal through a small press all by myself. No, I was no longer in the "repped by" club. No, I was not in the "Big 5" club either. But I found a whole new community of indie/small press authors who embraced me, congratulated me, and celebrated my win.
When my therapist emphasized the significance of my 3-book deal, without the 'small press' qualifier, it was a revelation. Two of the books in the acquired series were supposed to "die on sub" until the editor at my publisher saw something great in my work. I hadn't even realized I was downplaying my achievement until my therapist pointed it out. It made me understand that we often undermine our own successes. We need to learn to celebrate our victories without adding the 'but...' A win is a win. We might not be part of certain cliques or clubs, and that's perfectly fine. We must carve our own path and discover our own community.
If you haven't heard this in a while, I'll tell you. You are good enough. Your stories are good enough. Be proud of your accomplishments, from finishing that first draft to revision rounds and our aspirations toward publication. When you put yourself out there, it can be the most naked feeling. But someone out there wants to read your book, and if you're feeling discouraged by the insurmountable levels of rejection. Never ever let it define you. Never ever let it stop you from reaching your goals. Never ever let industry clubs and cliques reduce your wins.
Celebrate your victories because you deserve it.
April 18, 2024
Benefits Of Publishing With Small Press
While working with a publisher, I learned the importance of not overlooking certain benefits. Although larger publishers are often associated with more extensive marketing resources, it's important to consider the potential advantages of choosing a smaller press. While they may not have the same level of resources, small publishers often offer unique benefits that can lead to a successful publishing experience.
Here are some benefits and lessons I've learned from working with small presses:
• I’ve been given more creative flexibility regarding cover design input. Not all publishers allow this, but that’s the beauty of small press.
• When collaborating with cover designers, it's nice to provide examples of cover art that sold well. But it's essential to be mindful that graphic designers know what font, colors, and imagery work best together. Our vision might not go well together and can often make the cover look cheesy. So, it's better to trust graphic designers, especially those who have been designing cover art for a long time.
• The benefit of working with more flexible publishers is that you stand a chance at having more of a long-term relationship. Whereas with bigger houses, if your book doesn’t earn out to their expectation, they tend to drop authors for their subsequent books.
• If your book doesn't do as well with a smaller press for your debut, it isn't held against you as much as if you debuted with the Big 5 and your book flops. Obviously, we all want to do well regardless of our publishing path.
• While most of us want an agent, accepting a small press deal can be a launching pad for an author’s career. It is a start and puts your work out there. When I spoke with an agent via a consultation just for advice, they said it isn't frowned upon when authors get some of their work published through indie/small press. But it shows them that an author is serious about their craft.
• Publishing some of your books with small press doesn't mean you can't publish other work through traditional later. You can still obtain an agent if you secured the small press book deal independently.
Starting with a small press offers more positives than negatives, but what truly matters is that we're sharing our stories. Our unique voices are invaluable, and every avenue we take in publishing contributes to their resonance in the world. Keep writing, keep sharing, and remember that your voice is indispensable.
Here are some benefits and lessons I've learned from working with small presses:
• I’ve been given more creative flexibility regarding cover design input. Not all publishers allow this, but that’s the beauty of small press.
• When collaborating with cover designers, it's nice to provide examples of cover art that sold well. But it's essential to be mindful that graphic designers know what font, colors, and imagery work best together. Our vision might not go well together and can often make the cover look cheesy. So, it's better to trust graphic designers, especially those who have been designing cover art for a long time.
• The benefit of working with more flexible publishers is that you stand a chance at having more of a long-term relationship. Whereas with bigger houses, if your book doesn’t earn out to their expectation, they tend to drop authors for their subsequent books.
• If your book doesn't do as well with a smaller press for your debut, it isn't held against you as much as if you debuted with the Big 5 and your book flops. Obviously, we all want to do well regardless of our publishing path.
• While most of us want an agent, accepting a small press deal can be a launching pad for an author’s career. It is a start and puts your work out there. When I spoke with an agent via a consultation just for advice, they said it isn't frowned upon when authors get some of their work published through indie/small press. But it shows them that an author is serious about their craft.
• Publishing some of your books with small press doesn't mean you can't publish other work through traditional later. You can still obtain an agent if you secured the small press book deal independently.
Starting with a small press offers more positives than negatives, but what truly matters is that we're sharing our stories. Our unique voices are invaluable, and every avenue we take in publishing contributes to their resonance in the world. Keep writing, keep sharing, and remember that your voice is indispensable.
April 17, 2024
Content Development Tools For Authors & Content Creators
Hey #writingcommunity and fellow #booklovers, would love to do a #ShamelessSelfpromoSunday and support my fellow authors. I love seeing how creative writers can be when making promo trailers or marketing content for their books.
As a content developer, I often get asked how I create some of my social imagery and videos. Here are some of my favorite tools I often use in conjunction. As a videographer and video editor, my go-to used to be Adobe Premier Pro and After Effects. But since we’ve gone so mobile, I do not use those for social video creation.
I use the following:
• Canva Pro: I've designed over six hundred images and videos on Canva. Yep, they reward you and tell you how many photos you created.
• I love Canva Pro because it offers easy-to-use templates that make a novice look like a legit graphic designer without needing all the experience and schooling. Once you go pro, it’ll spoil you, and you’ll never want to go back. Canva Pro offers stock b-roll footage that would be expensive if you went elsewhere. The fact that they include it in the price is a bonus.
• CapCut Pro is worth the price, too. I love their transition and animated effects that turn ordinary photos and images into a more eye-catching ensemble. You can do a lot with the CapCut free version, but some of the font captioning and effects lure people into watching your video, which is the whole point.
• Text Art Pro app is an image and text only app with a bunch of free gorgeous stock images and fonts. It is more for typography posts. I use it a lot for Threads. But for TikTok videos and Instagram video posts, my go-to are Canva Pro + CapCut Pro.
Here’s a fun book teaser video I created in both Canva Pro and CapCut Pro. Feel free to share your book trailer, book links, or anything else. I love to support and uplift fellow authors.
As a content developer, I often get asked how I create some of my social imagery and videos. Here are some of my favorite tools I often use in conjunction. As a videographer and video editor, my go-to used to be Adobe Premier Pro and After Effects. But since we’ve gone so mobile, I do not use those for social video creation.
I use the following:
• Canva Pro: I've designed over six hundred images and videos on Canva. Yep, they reward you and tell you how many photos you created.
• I love Canva Pro because it offers easy-to-use templates that make a novice look like a legit graphic designer without needing all the experience and schooling. Once you go pro, it’ll spoil you, and you’ll never want to go back. Canva Pro offers stock b-roll footage that would be expensive if you went elsewhere. The fact that they include it in the price is a bonus.
• CapCut Pro is worth the price, too. I love their transition and animated effects that turn ordinary photos and images into a more eye-catching ensemble. You can do a lot with the CapCut free version, but some of the font captioning and effects lure people into watching your video, which is the whole point.
• Text Art Pro app is an image and text only app with a bunch of free gorgeous stock images and fonts. It is more for typography posts. I use it a lot for Threads. But for TikTok videos and Instagram video posts, my go-to are Canva Pro + CapCut Pro.
Here’s a fun book teaser video I created in both Canva Pro and CapCut Pro. Feel free to share your book trailer, book links, or anything else. I love to support and uplift fellow authors.
October 26, 2023
My Snarky Take On Embracing The Birthday Blues
There are too many reasons why feeling lousy around my birthday happens, like clockwork, and not even a generic gratitude list snaps me out of it. Until I remind myself that it's okay to feel down and realize dreams are accomplished at any age.
August 11, 2023
Why Sometimes Being In Editing Mode Can Lead To Writer’s Block
It’s wise to try and complete editorial tasks firsts and get them out of the way so that it frees up your calendar to write a new manuscript. Freeing your calendar means completing all tasks and previous obligations in order to give yourself the space to write.
July 19, 2023
What I Learned Editing 1st Ten Pages Of #WIP Via Nationwide Writing Conferences
Our first opening chapter is crucial. During revisions, we might need to revisit whether or not we can significantly improve readability by avoiding common mistakes.
January 16, 2023
Writing Despite Setbacks: Redirecting Personal Challenges Into Our Stories
In an ideal world, only positive things happen to us. We have all the time to write and are in the best psychological mindset. We’re free of stress, always in a zen-like state, can jump into our WIP, and immediately get into a flow. We never let anything get us down, have never experienced writer’s […]
January 9, 2023
How Almost Losing My Son In 2022 Helped Me To Define 2023 Goals
September 18, 2022, was like any other late summer Southern California day. The weather was nice, and my family and I were excited to use our Disneyland annual passes. As we prepared to leave, we noticed our then 15-month-old son was extra clingy and kept wanting to be held, which wasn’t unusual. But soon, clingy […]
