Christina Garner's Blog, page 6

Gateway Lesson 1

This is the first in a series of lessons for the students of Penn High School in Indiana. They are using my YA Urban Fantasy novel, Gateway as a way to learn about mythology via modern literature. In this intro, I give a brief explanation of the correlations between Greek and Roman gods, as well as talk about the first two chapters of the book and what inspired me to write it. If you’d like more information, including a lesson plan and access to Gateway for your class, email me. (info@thisdomain)

In Quiet Moments

In quiet moments

She slips in

A shadow on my soul

Or is she my soul

And I the shadow?

Empty-Handed Leap into the Void

I’ve been trying to make a decision lately about my life, my career, my life savings, and how much I am willing to risk to live the life I want to live. I pulled a rune on the matter, and as I have so very often in the past, pulled the Blank Rune. The Blank Rune is the end and the beginning. It portends a death: to a relationship, a way of life, a belief system. And what the rune asks for is nothing less than an empty-handed leap into the void. A “leap and the net will appear.” Or not. One never knows with nets. Which I suppose is appropriate given the ending of my first novel.

Still, it’s frightening. To risk everything on the hope that things will work out not just OK, but better than OK. Much better. I’ve been living OK for too long in my estimation and I’d like to go for great. But as those of us who work in the arts, or any medium that requires another to value our work in order to be paid for it, it’s not just a matter of working hard and giving it our all. We rely on others. It’s that feeling of dependence that finally had me leave acting, switching instead to writing and directing short films. It gave me a sense of control as opposed to a, “Please, sir, may I have some more?” mentality. That same feeling of captaining my own ship helped me decide to self-publish. I didn’t want to wait for a gatekeeper to deem me worthy. I wanted to make art and was willing to roll the dice to do so.

But here I am. Wanting to make my living full-time as a writer. Wanting to not dip into my savings to pay bills. And that leaves me in a position I feel least comfortable being in. Needing others. Needing many others: to buy my books, to like them, to tell their friends about them. It’s incredibly vulnerable and I only do vulnerable in small doses in certain situations. Don’t get me wrong–I write very vulnerable essays about suffering from depression, a suicide attempt when I was a child, et al. But those essays don’t require a response, and I’m not asking anyone to like them, nor spend money or spread the word. Needing that is a whole other level of vulnerability.

In truth, my experience with needing people hasn’t gone very well; I do better with a DIY mentality. So maybe this will become a great lesson. Not in getting what I need (I have no way of predicting whether I will or not) but in the asking. In allowing myself to feel how much I want to reach people with my writing. To know that no matter if I write it, design my own cover, and do my promo work, ultimately, I need other people to be a success. And not just the people who know and love me, but countless strangers.

How completely and utterly terrifying.

Which I suppose is what is required of anyone taking an empty-handed leap into the void. Here’s to hoping a net appears, and that it’s even better than I could have hoped for. I wish the same for you.

New interview

Hey Little Chickens!

Carrie over at Just-One-More-Chapter was kind enough to interview me about The Gateway Trilogy and writing in general. Check it out!

“I write to give myself strength. I write to be the chara...

“I write to give myself strength. I write to be the characters that I am not. I write to explore all the things I’m afraid of.”

~Joss Whedon

MTV and Rape Culture

MTV:  Where it’s not just sex that sells, it’s rape.

MTV has settled the lawsuit brought against them by Tonya Cooley, who was a victim of sexual battery while filming a Real World/Road Rules Challenge. Of the many infuriating aspects of this case, is the fact that MTV/Viacom’s defense didn’t consist of them denying the allegations, instead saying that:

“[Cooley] failed to avoid the injuries of which she complains. [She] was frequently intoxicated, rowdy, combative, flirtatious and on multiple occasions intentionally exposed her bare breasts and genitalia to other contestants.”

Hasn’t every victim of rape in history “failed to avoid” their injuries? MTV/Viacom are not even hiding the fact that they are saying that she was asking for it. And that, my friends, is the exact definition of rape culture. Think you aren’t affected by rape culture? Take a look at what my very articulate and insightful friend, Siobhan Barnett had to say:

“Real World: Chicago was my very first behind-the-scenes gig in the entertainment industry. I remember Tonya being very difficult. She clearly had some issues and seemed slightly unhinged most of the time. However, I also remember our wrap party, where she stood in front of the entire crew (many of whom couldn’t stand her) and not only thanked us for our hard work–she was the only cast member to do so–but apologized for her erratic behavior. I remember thinking how that took some guts, and I’ve been rooting for her ever since.

Even so, when I heard about this lawsuit I wondered about its authenticity. Tonya Cooley has been a fixture on the various RW/RR Challenges since her original appearance on Real World. I thought, maybe she’s out for more publicity. I had watched most of the seasons of the show, including all of Evan Starkman and Kenny Santucci’s appearances, and despite my feeling that they were both reprehensible assholes without a decent bone in their bodies, and DESPITE their frequent sexist and misogynistic remarks and behaviors toward the women who appeared on the show, I STILL somehow wanted to take their side: “They probably just edited them to look like douche bags.” “They wouldn’t really do anything serious, they’re just playground bullies.” “She always wants attention; I’m not being fair.” When it came down to it, I didn’t trust my own gut feeling about these guys or Tonya.

That, ladies and gentlemen, is how systemic rape culture works. It is ingrained in us to believe a woman should not be taken seriously, that all of her past behaviors should be entered as evidence, and that men are to be given the benefit of the doubt no matter what. We always err on the side of blaming the victim. I am posting my thoughts on this to show that it isn’t always men who refuse to hear a woman’s voice when she speaks out against her attacker. The problem is far more insidious and complicated than that, and I think it is often tied to the self-loathing we females are taught we should feel as part and parcel of our femininity.”

I quote her so extensively because I couldn’t have said it better myself. I want to be very, very clear: Rape is not the natural consequence of drunken, flirtatious behavior. It is the result of rapists. Period.

Another point I’d like to make, is that even though MTV/Viacom admits the sexual battery took place, (which therefore means the men who perpetrated it are rapists) they continue to hire them. Evan Starkman hosts an online show related to The Challenge, and Kenny Stantucci is the host of the Jersey Shore After Party. These are men who:

“According to Cooley, just after this, she passed out on the floor. She later learned that Santucci and Starkman slapped her in the face several times to try and wake her up. When they could not, they inserted a toothbrush into her vagina. From the complaint:

The following morning, unaware of the sexual assault, Plaintiff noticed that she was sore in her vagina and had lacerations/rash like abrasions on her labia. Plaintiff assumed the lacerations/abrasions were some sort of rash caused by her participation in various physical challenges.”

Add to that, the fact that attached to every article on this settlement, even those that have a clear slant to Ms. Cooley, are only posting her photo. Where are the photos of the Starkman and Stantucci? MTV/Viacom are publicly blaming and shaming Tonya, where is the shaming of the victimizers?

Evan Starkman

Kenny Stantucci

Angry? I hope so. Here’s what you can do about it:

Complain to MTV. I think the best way for this to go viral is to do this publicly, via their message boards, or Twitter. If you tweet “.@MTV” (notice the period in front of their Twitter handle) it will not only show up in their feed, but yours as well, which makes it easily re-tweetable by your followers.
Do the same with the Twitter accounts of the victimizers. You can reach Kenny at: .@KennySantucci and Evan Starkman (who claims in his bio to be an, “overall great guy.”) Let him know he isn’t: .@theevanstarkman
Share this post, or another like it on your Facebook, Twitter, etc.
Make it a point to be aware of how you are complicit in rape culture

Any other suggestions? Please make them in my comments.

Images of (Airbrushed) Beauty

I present these images not to denigrate or downplay the beauty of the women in them, but to point out exactly what’s being airbrushed. It’s not just blemishes and slimmer hips. It’s a complete overhaul of the human body. This isn’t a new practice–ancient sculpture and paintings always flattered the model–but unlike their predecessors, these images don’t just flatter and enhance the subject, they set up a standard of beauty no one can live up to. If Jessica Alba is getting heavily airbrushed, what hope do we mortal women have of achieving this modern day version of beauty? And while this gallery leaves out men, they are certainly being airbrushed as much as women. Not to mention the (possibly greater) damage it inflicts–giving men a completely false and unrealistic idea of what beauty is and what they expect/deserve in a partner.

She looks stunning in the before, but apparently not stunning enough. She’s been given a smaller waist, larger, firmer breasts, smaller hips, smoother skin, etc.

An undeniably beautiful woman–airbrushed or not–and yet even while presenting her as a voluptuous woman they set an impossible standard by slimming her her thighs and waist.

A tiny woman, and yet they give her more curves by slimming her waist. Also, they have removed the small fold where her arm joins her body. Why is that offensive enough to deserve removal?

Talk about setting an impossible standard for beauty… Bethenny Frankel is in amazing shape, and yet they felt the need to smooth her ribs. (Among other things) Personally, I like the “before” pic much better.

How do you feel when you look at these images, and how do you think they affect society as a whole?

One Billion Rising

An important, (very) short film.

Griff’s got a better smile than I do!

Griff’s got a better smile than I do!

Make it Till You Make It

I’ve always been a bit of a rebel; a do-it-yourselfer. So, I guess it should come as no surprise that instead of going the traditional route, I’ve become a self-published author.

Not that that was always the plan. When I first started writing screenplays years ago, the goal was to get an agent who could get my work in front of the right people. Even without an agent, I was hired to write the first draft of a screenplay, which proved a turning point, if only to me. (The movie didn’t get made, but I did feel like I was a “real” writer.)

Sometime after that, though, things changed.

For one, my screenplay wasn’t *quite* good enough, and after multiple revisions I put it away. For five years. A year later, when NaNoWriMo rolled around, I was ready for a new challenge.

I completed my 50,000 words with a few hours to spare, and had myself a very rough first draft of a novel. At the time, I was working in Hawaii for LOST, and once again, I put my work away, albeit for a much shorter time.

Soon after completing the draft it was tax time, and I asked my CPA if there was any way to deduct any of the expenses I incurred while writing: software purchased, paying an editor to help me get a solid second draft, etc… He told me (incorrectly, I later learned) that unless the work was published within that year, the expenses were not deductible.

This was just at the beginning of the self-publishing boom, and I knew little about it, except that it existed. I got caught up in work, life, travel and forgot all about it.

Then, in early 2011 I came across a USA Today article about Amanda Hocking and her unlikely success at self-publishing novels she’d written in a few weeks time. I read some samples of her work and thought, “If she make this work, I can make this work.”

At the time, my novel was close to being done, but I was circling the drain, not quite getting it where it needed to be. A friend of mine, who knows I work better with an external deadline, asked me how long I really needed to get the book done. When I told her six weeks, she said, “Great, your party is April 15th. We’ll call it, ‘F* your taxes, read my book’ party, and we’ll hand out printed copies to your 20 closest friends.”

Talk about motivation! There is nothing like the fear of humiliation to light a fire under my ass. With hard work and the support of friends and an editor, I made my deadline, handing out copies of Gateway at the party.

What a feeling! I’d kept my word and had a completed novel to show for it. I then allowed myself two weeks off to do absolutely nothing but watch crap television and spent the following week working with a formatter to get my novel ready to be published. One month later, on May 17th, Gateway was available on Amazon, et al.

I rallied my friends and family to purchase it within a short span of time, pushing it into the bestselling ranks for teen fiction and occult fiction. Doing that made it visible to the masses, and I began receiving downloads and reviews from strangers. I also queried several book bloggers, offering a copy of the book in exchange for an honest review. Many responded yes, and their comments led to more sales.

As with all sales, there have been ebbs and flows, but July of 2012 through the present, over one year after I published Gateway, has been my best sales period yet–by far. Book 2 in the Trilogy, entitled Chasm, became available in mid-August, 2 weeks before my deadline of September 1st. Using my built-in audience from Gateway and all that I’ve learned this past 18 months has helped make this novel a success also. I can’t tell you how exciting and soul-nourishing it is when a complete stranger writes me to say she wants to be a Keeper, or that he is dying for Book 3.

Whether you are an aspiring author, filmmaker painter, or business owner, there’s no time like the present to remove the word, “aspiring” and simply be what you hope to become.

Go beyond, “fake it till you make it,” and actually, “keep making it till you make it.”

With the advent of Facebook, YouTube and Twitter, your audience has never been easier to reach. People discover new talent every day and share it with their network, making even the most unlikeliest of content go viral. (Remember double rainbow guy?)

So, set some goals, get the support you need, and make something–anything. As long as it speaks to your soul, it will speak to someone else’s as well. And then do what it takes to share it, getting it into the hearts and minds of the people who can use it most.