Benjamin Wallace's Blog, page 6
July 14, 2020
Meet Detective Karen
I’m working on a new character named Detective Karen. You probably know her already. She pops up all the time on social media whenever there is a local crime and cracks the case using insight that rivals Poirot, Lansbury, or a three-year-old that is rocking back and forth and rattling off the names of things […]
June 13, 2020
New suffixes for a better world
The Pirahã live along the Maici River in the Amazon and speak one of the world’s most unique languages. One thing that distinguishes the language from others is that their suffixes modify their statement to explain how they attained the knowledge they are conveying. If you were telling someone they had a hole in their […]
May 19, 2020
Some choice SPAM
I loved it when my SPAM has a hint of international intrigue. I was happy to see this because I’m getting tired of the dying widows in Oklahoma leaving me their mineral rights. Forget that Signoino means young boy. Forget that crimes of international commerce are being handled by the Chief Airport Security Agency. I’m […]
May 13, 2020
In these unprecedented times…
In these uncertain times, your company should be addressing this unprecedented threat. If you have not already crafted a response message, feel free to use one from below. COVID-19 In these times of unprecedented uncertainty, your safety is our top priority. In response to the COVID-19 threat, we’ve adapted our policies to provide a safe […]
March 20, 2020
28 Quick Book Reviews
It’s been a little while since I’ve posted what I’ve been listening to on Blinkist. I was all set to post something last week but then the world fell apart. I know…excuses, excuses. I am enjoying the format. It’s like a podcast minus the inane banter and CBD ads. I mostly listen at the gym […]
A message to Benjamin Wallace Books customers
A message to Benjamin Wallace Books customers At Benjamin Wallace Books, our first concern is your safety right after the concern that crabs may form an unholy alliance with lobsters and crab walk out of the ocean to form a crustacean caliphate that we should all live in fear of pinched toes. In light of […]
God’s Rambo
The real-life Night Rider was Danish. Helge Meyer was Danish Special Forces Officer stationed at Rhine Airforce Base when the war in Bosnia broke out. He knew the country and knew the roads so he brought an idea to the US forces. With their help, he outfitted a ’79 Camaro with armor plating, infra-red absorbing […]
March 9, 2020
Forget the body. Save the brain.
When it comes time to freeze a loved one, you have a very important decision to make. Do you freeze the whole body or just the brain? At KrioRus, you can freeze a whole body for $36k. But it’s only $15k to freeze the brain. That’s a pretty substantial savings. And, let’s be honest, if you’ve […]
February 24, 2020
Here There Be Lizard Men
I’ve got an ad running right now that shows an ICBM launch. As it travels, the narrator reads the first line of my book, “Even a mushroom cloud has a silver lining.” The problem is, the image shows the curvature of the Earth. Or, as at least one commenter a day calls it, “LIES!” […]
February 12, 2020
The Greatest Star Wars Playset Never Sold
The coolest Star Wars playset I had wasn’t the Death Star. It wasn’t the remote control Sandcrawler. It didn’t even come from Kenner. It came from the November 1978 issue of Woman’s Day Magazine. I’m talking about the Outer-Space Station. It looked like Logan’s Run and was populated with Star Wars toys and the odd […]
