Cate Ellink's Blog, page 58

Sunday Story - A Hawk Enslaved

A Hawk Enslaved has been sitting in my To Be Read pile for quite a while. I kept looking at it because I'd heard good things, yet I didn't open it. I'm not entirely sure why not. I think it may be because one of my favourite films is LadyHawke and I was worried it would ruin my memories - which is insane, because it wasn't LadyHawke at all.

This is a story of Vikings, raiders, slaves, political intrigue and a man and woman in love and trying to make it work against all odds.

It's beautifully written, with some gorgeous descriptions and phrasing.

The sexual tension drips from the page, as well as suspense tension.

And the hawking is an important but minor part of the story - no women are turned into hawks in this story.

I thoroughly enjoyed Venetia Green's A Hawk Enslaved.

Phallic Friday - raincoat-free bonking

Okay, another interesting story online yesterday. You can find it here.

An Aussie guy's over in Bali and says he's shagged over 100 women in the 4 months he's been there, all condom-free. For a TV show, he goes to get tested for everything - and finds he's STD-free. Pretty lucky huh? Or just a good story?

But the question I have is, are we going overboard with the sex protection stuff?

I know Lily and I have discussed, over and over again, the use of protection in books. And the last time I brought the topic up, I was having a dilemma about oral sex and STD transfer and if we (as responsible authors reflecting society, or whatever) needed to show our characters using protection during oral sex. The answer, from colleagues, interestingly enough was 'no'. Maybe this was because my scene bringing up the discussion of protection during oral sex was so bad! LOL.

I've been looking as I read. I haven't seen too many condoms/dental dams used during oral sex at all, in books.

Which leads me back to my question... are we going overboard with protection?

Sometimes, to make change happen, you need to shock people and push things to the limit. Is this what we've done with protection?

I think in erotic romance we probably have, or I have in my over-thinking. I think it's a tool to be used. Some couples/people may demand protection, others may not. And that's how I'm going to go about protection in my novels from now on.

In real life, I've no idea. This guy's results are quite surprising to me. Maybe he got lucky! Although, maybe STDs aren't as rampant as they were due to so much safe sex. Or maybe this is all TV spin.

I guess some people take out insurance, while others don't. It's about how much risk you're willing to take. I think my characters will be a little more risky. As for me, I'd take out insurance!

Wildlife Wednesday - Sand Crab

Can you see the sand crab in the photo?

They have incredible camouflage, don't they? I only see them when they scurry, and this one stood up so his shadow helped highlight him.

Oh, poop! I looked up sand crab and generally, the crabs called sand crabs have two distinct dots on the back of their shell. Poop! So I've always called these guys sand crabs...and they're not :( Why does Wildlife Wednesday do this to me!?!?!?!

So, it's a crab, of some sort! Okay, Google is my friend.

Maybe it's a Ghost Crab. The description sounds right and the eyes are on stalks, it's the right tiny size, the camouflage is right. But the Australian Museum site has no picture. And the pictures I've seen don't really convince me either way. But none of the crabs on here look right either (this is a NSW Dept. guide).

Oh, but one of the sites references Dakin's Australian Seashores book (another of my favourite books that was left at my parents' when I moved inland but I claimed it later, phew! What would I do without my library?), which is in my bookcase...and now I'm happy! It has a photo of my crab on page 226 and it says it's "one of the ghost crabs, so named because of their translucent cryptic colouring".

This is what Dakin says:
They have holes in dry sand well above the high tide markThey burrow up to 1m deep (that's not bad for a crab that's about 3 cm in size!)They're swift footed and very difficult to catchNight time is their favourite hunting periodthey can make noise :) but very few people have ever heard it (oh, only one species, and not the one I photographed). The one that makes noise prefers warmer climes, north of Sydney.
Happy now. Thank you Wildlife Wednesday, now I'll call it a Ghost Crab and be correct!

Sunday Story - age

I'm not sure where these musings should go, so here they are.

In Australia we have a show on at the moment called, When Love Comes To Town. It's a busload of 12 women travelling to various places in rural Australia to find their perfect man (who is based in the town, not necessarily a farmer). I'd seen the ads and it intrigued me as to how it worked but the first two shows i only caught a glimpse of. Then last night, I got to watch the whole show. I'm not going to talk about the show, but something else I noticed while watching.

There was a girl aged 22, a whole bunch who are 26-30 and one aged 35. I think that's roughly the breakdown, I wasn't paying strict attention! Anyway, Miss 22 asked to go home last night because it was all too much for her - not just the competing for a man, but the competing with other women, and also being away from her family.

It was a stark reminder that at 22, you can still be really young, self-conscious, and not know who you are yet. At one stage the guy asked her if she could cook. Her answer - Mum does it all, I live at home. You know, that shocked me at first, but then I watched her, watched her mannerisms, checked out her clothes and makeup. I don't think she was lying.

She was young and not confident. She had excessively bright lipstick (as do many of the others) but she didn't wear it like she was comfortable. Her clothes were more comfortable than flirtatious (and there are some girls there with clothes that show a lot of flesh!). She didn't fit the mould of the others on the show.

The other girls are power-women. They know what they want. They know who they are. And they're competitive. I feel sorry for the guys because they probably don't know what's hit them!

It makes me so glad I moved to the country and spent my 20s and 30s out of the power-games girls play. I was the naive 22 year old and gosh, I felt sorry for her last night - but there was no way in hell I would have even applied to be on the show!

So, age matters. As a generalisation, heroines with a few more years know so much more about themselves, are confident in their own skin, and go after what they want. Young heroines are still finding their feet.

Phallic Friday - good in bed?

I read a news article and I got the link as soon as I read it this time, so you can read it here.

The article lists 7 ways you can tell if you're good in bed. And this is the checklist:
you feel connected to your partneryou're confidentyou're open to change in the bedroomyou listen to your partneryou don't rush thingsyou welcome the opportunity to have sexyou're playful in bed
What do you think of the list?

I'm always sceptical when I see these articles. I usually read them thinking I can write a post saying what crap they are - but this one I can understand. I think these are the things that have to happen for the 'chemistry' to be right. If these things aren't there, neither of you will be good in bed.

If you're connected, then there's already chemistry. If you're confident, then you're happy with yourself, and that's halfway to making a good relationship. If you're open to change, then you're willing to talk, try, test, and meet someone else's needs. If you listen to your partner, they're going to love that, especially if you listen and act! Rushing is one of the biggest killers for me. Even if you have a time limit, make it seem like you have forever - it's so much hotter. Sometimes sex is difficult to fit into the every day (especially with kids in the house) so welcoming the opportunity is important for success of a long term relationship. And playful makes sex fun, and that's a way to never let it become old or boring or staid.

So I'm happy with this list. Do you have anything to add to it?

Footy Players

I've worked something out tonight and just had to share. I worked out that I like a particular style of player - one who does little for themselves but is a workhorse for the team. Let me try to explain.

Yesterday I read an article about the Queensland halves pairing of Jonathan Thurston and Cooper Cronk. It was contrasting them - one creative, outgoing, mop of hair, big laugh, extrovert, the other a thinker, quiet, short back and sides, gets in and consistently does the hard work.

Then tonight I watched the State of Origin. And Cooper Cronk broke his arm early on and came off. Daly Cherry-Evans went on as his replacement. And Queensland didn't do so well. DCE is an excellent player and has a huge rap among his peers and the media. But he does nothing for me. And tonight I worked out what it is. I like Mr Consistency who gets in and steadies the show, who dictates the play among his team but the opposition never seem to work out what his next move is. That's how Cronk plays, that's how Sterlo played.

DCE, Andrew Johns, Steve Mortimer, Mitchell Pearce, they're all the media favourites because they have flair. They do things that are unexpected. But for me, they don't do the hard yards, the consistency. That's not a criticism, it's a style of play. I prefer the ones who work hard consistently rather than the flair.

Darren Lockyer is another player I've admired and he too was a consistency player, but he probably had a bit more flair than Coops or Sterlo.

So, I hated seeing Coops get hurt, but it allowed me to work something out that had been bugging me. I never understood why I never liked the same players most people admired. Now I know. Although, someone will probably tell me I'm wrong!

And just an aside... They had a dressing room shot of Coops putting on a jacket and oh my freaking god, that man's body! I tried to describe it for my Deep Diving hero...but when he turned side on, there were muscles all rippling there that I didn't even know existed. His back was even more that I imagined. Holy cow. If I ever find a snippet of that footage...it will be inspirational (and I might even share it).

Wildlife Wednesday - Wallaby footprints

Wallaby prints - restingLast week, I found wallaby footprints in the sand. There's something really special about seeing these in the sand. I expect to see 'roos and wallabies in the bush, not on the beach!

There's a lot of national park around me, and this is where the wallabies are. Sometimes we see them on the side of the road from town, usually grazing but sometimes they've been hit and killed.

One of my favourite books I collected while at uni is called Mammal Tracks and Signs by Barbara Triggs, which then became Tracks, Scats and Other Traces in a later edition (yes, I have both!). I've always been fascinated by footprints, tracks in the bush and identifying animals by them - I blame reading mysteries!!


Wallaby prints - moving From resting to moving

Sunday Story - words

Today I want to talk about words and word choices. You see, I'm doing edits, so words are on my mind.

I'm a repetitive bugger. 90% of my edits are for repetition of words or phrases. I get a word in my head and nothing will change it. I use it over and over and over again. Do I notice? Nope! But it would drive a reader demented!

So I sit with my thesaurus and use new words. Sometimes I don't even need a thesaurus because different ways of phrasing, or different word choices are there, as soon as it's pointed out - which is rather embarrassing!

But there are some words I just can't use. Mostly the 'sex' words.

For me, 'pussy' is a cat. I really can't use that word for other purposes. And that leads to a problem - there aren't a lot of choices. I usually go with 'cunt' but I know a lot of readers find that crude and derogatory...I don't. Out of the two, I will always go with 'cunt'. I quite like 'quim' but that's so historical, I don't think it has a place in contemporary stories. I have used 'lady parts', 'mons', 'labia', and 'nether lips' because I've run out of other choice. Often I try to imply rather than be explicit, but sometimes you need a body part for clarity.

And then the male bits. 'Balls' is okay, I can use that. I'm not a fan of 'dick'. To me it's a boy's name, or a 'limp dick' and not something masculine and impaling. 'Cock' and 'penis' are my choices. I have used 'shaft' but to me that's not the entire organ.

I write erotica so I can describe the sexual action and body parts, so I try to keep away from the purple prose and flowery descriptions. But my background is science and I'm often drawn to the scientific descriptions, but then I worry that people might need an anatomical chart to decode the scene! I don't want that!

So...edits are fun but they're not easy. They really show up my laziness, and my pig-headedness in not using the words I don't like. But I do like seeing my story becoming all gleaming and polished. I love how smooth the reading becomes. I particularly love the little comments this editor has put in the text - times when she's shocked, or when she likes something, or when she sees a deeper meaning in a scene. It's special.

So, do you have any words you hate to read/use?

Are you fond of edits?

Phallic Friday - open marriages

Last week I read an article about a couple with an open marriage - and of course I can't find it anywhere now I need it!

But no matter, they had been together for 13 years and had had an open marriage for the last 8 years. They had children, one child together and an older child from the woman's previous relationship (s). The older child was 16 and knew of her parent's lifestyle.

Open marriages fascinate me. I'd love to understand how you get to a point where you can be so open with each other that you could ask to have sex with someone else, alone, without your partner. This is what this couple did.

One of the Naughty Ninja girls is a swinger and I asked her about this. She had a book she was writing to help people, like me, understand their lifestyle and decide if it was right for them.

The biggest thing I got from reading her book, was that jealousy was never an issue if you truly wanted an open marriage/swinger lifestyle. You weren't competing for attention, or for partners, you truly enjoyed seeing your partner with another person, or thinking about them with someone else, or listening to their story after they'd been with someone else.

And that fascinates me.

I think one day I'm going to write a story about an open marriage. I'd like to challenge myself to think more deeply about the situation.

Wildlife Wednesday - Goose Barnacles

I found these on the beach. They seem to get washed up when the seas are rough. They're some kind of barnacle that live in a shell, attached to a rocky substrate. They are alive when washed up onto the beach and do a little movement where they come in and out of their shell.

I don;t know what they are - again :( But if I do them as a Wildlife Wednesday, I hunt around to try to find out. So let's see what I find!

Oh, so incredible. It's a Goose Barnacle. Here's the Australian Museum site with some info.

Goose Barnacles are closely related to crustaceans - crabs and lobsters - and the brown kind of feeler things you might be able to see coming out of the shell are 'legs' they use for feeding.

I love doing this column and actually finding out what these weird things I find are. It's all too easy to assume I know what it is and not really test myself to see.

Hee hee hee...just had to google sex and barnacles. OMG! Most barnacles are hermaphrodites. Male barnacles have the largest penis relative to body size in the animal kingdom. And they shoot sperm into the ocean, the female gathers it and fertilises her eggs. Here's the article - it's very clever :)