Debra Anastasia's Blog, page 29

Saving Poughkeepsie Teaser

"If he stacked enough dead bodies on top of one another, no one would see past them to find the ones he loved." Beckett in Saving Poughkeepsie

Saving Poughkeepsie Teaser

"The handshake got a third arm as Blake entered and joined in. This was magic for Beckett, pure and simple. The world slowed down and his cares melted away as he looked from face to face. He loved these men so fiercely, it’d probably scare them if they knew." Saving Poughkeepsie
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Soft Kisses

Poughkeepsie Brotherhood Series!!!
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Hate Sex

Return to Poughkeepsie (Book 2 of 3)

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Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Return-Poughk...

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1...

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Trailer #1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q-17o...

Trailer #2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7g-9...

The Revenger (Teaser)

#WIP The Revenger (sometime in 2015)

"She didn't want to see her wedding band on her hand when she was forced to touch this man. If she was able to keep from cracking his head like an egg --which didn't look too fucking likely." https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/22847441-the-revenger

Sex on a Driveway

Bittersweet Seraphim (Book 2 of 2)
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Trailer

Vibrating Fist

 
Crushed Seraphim  .99 cents (Book 1 of 2!)
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Amazon UK

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Trailer

Crushed Seraphim .99 cents

Crushed Seraphim

Amazon:
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0051AN6BO/ref=cm_sw_r_tw_dp_JVbWtb06SX2DK

Amazon UK: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Crushed-Seraphim-Debra-Anastasia-ebook/dp/B0051AN6BO/ref=la_B0051BO7I4_1_3?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1405099389&sr=1-3

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/11286888-crushed-seraphim

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Omnific Publishing:

http://omnificpublishing.com/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=45_21&products_id=50

Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oifs13WO9AY

Promise wrapped in a prayer.. The Revenger

#WIP Her gaze had never left his eyes, like she could see right into his mind. The screen cracked again, a fissure from the top to the bottom. She was actually going to break through the impenetrable glass.

Finally the chair dropped from her grasp. She walked to the mural and put one hand on it. He mimicked her motion despite his bodyguard's protests.

Hand-to-hand they stood and he could feel her hot hate. This close to her face he could see into her cloudy, gray eyes. They held so much pain.

He almost felt sympathy.

Her perfect lips, rose-colored from her exertion, began moving. He hoped the camera was still functioning so he could replay her words again and again later. Her voice was reverent, a promise wrapped in a prayer.

"Know this, I will kill you. Take these words and carve them on your horrible soul." She looked from his lips to his eyes and smiled before adding, "I will be the one that kills you."

The Revenger (unedited teaser)

She's amazing, but she's afraid.

August 27th 2011 Hurricane Irene hit our home. Above was the picture I was able to take the morning after --as soon as my phone was booted up from the charge in my van. That single act of gravity and wind changed our lives in a ton of little ways and a couple of big ones.

Some good things came from that destruction. I was forced to pitch a lot of material goods. I had to edit our possessions quickly and without the benefit of electricity. And yes, that was good. It taught my whole family that home is about the people you love, not the place you stay.

I became more vocal in general. I refused to back down on anything because it was up to me to make sure that the insurance and builders and school stuff stayed in order. I went toe-to-toe with an intimidating, vile con man. I won. My kids didn't miss a holiday, a homework assignment, anything while we were in transit. First we lived in a hotel. Then a third floor apartment.

Eventually we were back in our house, I had to re-edit the possessions coming back in. So many of the things I had to hold other things were destroyed. The yard sale I could have had...oh well. Then  a fight of a different type approached as the con man's thefts trickled down to us. I was on the phone, fighting a high priced lawyer, who tried every dirty trick in the book to sue us for something we had already paid for, with a receipt to match. I made him my bitch as well. In the throes of the back and forth, where I used my knowledge of the post office services against his arrogant ass, he offered me a job. I turned him down.

It's getting hard to picture the old house, sitting in the new one. I longed for this feeling, having the whole mess behind us. And all that fighting I was doing, it had a pair of huge green eyes driving me on, my girl was having issues.

My daughter was always an anxious child, but the experience of the storm and the aftermath broke something in her. And that's really the fight I wanted. This thing that made her so afraid, I wanted to fight that. But it's in her pretty little head. Her gorgeous heart starts to race and I can't fight her heart, I'd never want to.

So here we are 2014, years later. I'm still battling this thing with her. I never want her to think she has to do it alone, even though I'm afraid that is the only way she can truly beat it, or learn from it. Control it, maybe?

I wish I knew how it was from her side. My son had the same experience. Noise for noise, loss for loss and yet he rolled through it easy. But he's easygoing in general, it's a personality trait for him.

I'm grateful that I learned that anxiety looks so much like misbehavior. But that you deal with it in the exact opposite way. I can spot a panic attack like hers from a mile away now.

Back in 2011, after the house was safe for us to re-enter before they demolished it, I handed her Sharpie markers and let her use the walls as her canvas. I expected puppies. Maybe the cat. She loved/loves drawing animals. Instead she painted the walls with the pain she carried.

 



I wish there was a simple answer. That there was something I could do or fight. And of course I'm grateful. We are here, we made it back to the neighborhood, we're home and have been for almost two years now. But today has me frustrated. Looking for answers. For now I look at the pictures above to try and help me have patience. To try and figure out how to help.