Donald Miller's Blog, page 35

Three Paradigm Shifts That Will Improve Your Marketing

We just wrapped up another Live StoryBrand Workshop in Nashville and it was a huge success. It made me think to share a few of the paradigm shifts that are most powerful for those who come through these Workshops.

Here are a few of them:

Your brand is not the hero in a story, your customer is. What this means is we all have to switch our mindset from thinking of ourselves as the hero to thinking of ourselves as the guide. We are like Haymitch in Hunger Games, Yoda in Star Wars or Peter Brand in Moneyball. Our job is to empathize with the needs of our customers and provide a solution to their problems.
Customers buy solutions to their internal needs more than external ones. While most companies sell solutions to external problems, most customers are looking for solutions to how those problems make them feel. At StoryBrand, we explore the internal concerns our customers face and how we can talk about those concerns in our marketing material.
Most corporate marketing material uses too much inside language. Each of our clients assumed their customers knew more than they did. We call this the “curse of knowledge.” Over and over we’d point out their material wasn’t clear enough. Do you want your customer to attend a workshop, buy a candle, call you for an appointment? Then this should be said clearly and plainly. And it should be the obvious button to click on your website.

And as always, one of the best parts about the StoryBrand Workshop is that a community is created. We eat together, laugh together, and sometimes even cry together.

When you start talking about communicating your dreams, things get real.

At the end of our time together, each client leaves with a BrandScript they can use for years to come. Their BrandScripts help them know exactly who they are, what they offer and why it matters to their customers.

We’re expecting each of their businesses to see a significant uptick because they’re being more clear and direct.

Congrats, StoryBrand Alumni. Can’t wait to see where your business goes now that you have a complete marketing plan!

We just wrapped up a Workshop, but it’s not too late to join us at the next one. Our little family of well-equipped business owners is growing. Register today. These workshops are intentionally small and fill up fast.

Why I Keep Blogging When It Doesn’t Change Lives

I’ve been in the online writing and content creation space for going on 10 years now; and things have changed quite a bit in that time. When I started, it was for selfish reasons. I hoped mostly for attention and a place I could express myself.

Photo Credit: Garry Knight, Creative Commons

These days, I really hope my words help and change people.

The problem is people just don’t change from blog posts.

There are some exceptions, of course. But largely, people change slowly, over time—not all at once, after reading a 500 word article online. Even if, while reading, we have some sort of “aha” moment, chances are high that “aha” won’t stick.

We may think about something differently or have a new idea. But when it really comes down to executing it, we’ll be back to our old ways.

Or—we’ll argue with the blog post and it will leave us even more convinced we were always right.

Blog posts give us information, they rile us up about a topic, they might even offer new perspective. But they don’t change us.

What really changes us, I’m learning, is experiences.

For better or worse, we are more likely to be changed by something someone says to us, a near-death experience, a tragic loss, a new love, the gift of having a child, a weekend away, a beautiful vacation, etc.

Even very small experiences—like someone yelling at you in the grocery store, or the woman at the bank who lent you her pen—leave us changed.

Not so much a 500 word blog post.

Words do change us. It is possible. Especially when an author can take their words to invite you into an experience with them. This would be the kind of experience you have when you pick up a book from an author, start reading, and lose yourself.

You can’t put it down.

But how often do you have an experience like that while reading online? Virtually never, would be my guess.

So if blog posts can’t change us—why do we keep blogging?

This has been a question on my mind lately. Why do we keep blogging if the goal is to change people and people aren’t changing from blog posts?

One thing that I keep reminding myself is that it doesn’t stop with blog posts. The blog posts and Tweets and Facebook shares are just one part of the process to invite people into an experience.

They’re just one tiny, little piece. Just one step.

If you think of it like a dating relationship, a blog post or tweet is like that first meeting. You want to make an impression. You want to gain trust. You want to get someone thinking. You might even make a fool of yourself trying.

Later, you can build up the courage to ask for the date.

A blog post is not the end game. It’s just the start.

And if you can get someone’s attention, you can, later, invite them into a deeper experience—something that really does have the potential to change their life. An eBook that will take an hour or so to read, rather than five minutes. An online eCourse that might take a few days. A conference that will take a weekend.

It’s more than a blog post. It’s a little bit bigger step.

It is possible to curate an experience for someone that will change their life.

Even then, there’s no guarantee they’ll actually change. There are few guarantees of anything in this life.

But the reason I keep creating content on the Internet and keep writing books and pouring myself into conferences and webinars and eCourses I believe in is this: I really do believe experiences change people.

That’s how I’ve changed. It’s how I’ve worked to make progress with anxiety, it’s how I’ve changed my marriage… it’s how I’ve overcome my cynicism and depression.

Experiences are it.

So yes, it’s true. A blog post will rarely change your life. Maybe even never. But you never know what could come from a blog post. And even if it’s just a minuscule little step away from depression and toward happiness, away from chaos and toward order, it will be worth it.

I haven’t arrived. I don’t have all the answers. But I’m on a path and my experiences are changing me and life is getting better everyday.


I hope yours is too.

Why I Keep Blogging When It Doesn’t Change Lives is a post from: Storyline Blog

Why You’re Leading But Nobody is Following

A few years ago, I attended a poetry reading from America’s former poet laureate, Billy Collins.

Photo Credit: Marcelo Noah, Creative Commons

Billy teaches poetry at Lehman College at City University of New York, and during the interview portion of the program, he was asked what one thing he emphasised to his students the most.

Collins answered confidently: clarity.

He said many of his students naively felt it was beneath them to be clear, as though their poem would be perceived as more sophisticated if its meaning was elusive.

He jokingly asked his interviewer what he thought his poem Fishing on The Susquehanna in July was about, and the interviewer shrugged his shoulders as though he didn’t know.

It’s about fishing on the Susquehanna in July, Collins laughed.

Collins challenged the audience to dare to be clear.

I’ll never forget it. He wasn’t just giving advice about writing poetry, he was giving advice about life.

Dare to be clear.

How can any of us get what we want in life if we don’t communicate what we want clearly? Billy Collins might as well have been echoing the words of Jesus:

Ask and it will be given to you.

Amateurs are vague but professionals communicate clearly.

Everybody kind of knows what they want, but few people have taken the time to reflect so they can communicate in such a way people understand. Most leaders kind of know where they want to take people but revolutionary leaders say it clearly.

This is especially important for leaders.

The reality of leadership is this: The world is standing before you, curious, asking where you’d like to take them.

If you kind of have an answer, they’ll follow somebody else.

If you want to be a leader, communicate clearly because that’s the only way anybody can know whether or not they want to join you.

In my own life, when I’ve not communicated clearly where I’ve wanted to take people, it’s because of one of two reasons — either I didn’t know myself, or I was too afraid to risk rejection.

Either reason disqualifies me from leadership.

Know where you want to take people and ask them to come with you. Then, confidently take them there.

Why You’re Leading But Nobody is Following is a post from: Storyline Blog

A Message for Dads And Everyone on Father’s Day

A few years ago I spent some time at the White House to hear about the initiatives the President was rolling out in anticipation of Father’s Day. I left encouraged and excited.

It’s really great to see how much care is being taken to serve those who are growing up without fathers.

I remember when I first started talking about mentoring and fatherhood, how little discussion there was about the issue of fatherlessness. It was a dark subject that brought up thoughts of weakness.

Now, it seems, a positive spotlight is being shone on the power and importance of fathers.

Photo Credit: Tim Pierce, Creative Commons

If your dad is around, would you do me a favor?

Would you make a really big deal out of him this weekend?

Would you take him to a baseball game, shower him with corny (or perhaps thoughtful) gifts, and tell him how important he is to you?

It’ll mean the world.

I’m hoping, in the next decade, Father’s Day becomes a huge deal, a day of celebrating positive masculinity, a day of celebrating the amazing gift that strong men bring to families and communities.

We can start by making an enormous deal out of Father’s Day.

Fatherlessness is an issue that impacts all of us—whether we know it or not.

The absence of positive male role models in a child’s life has an impact on teen dropout rates, drug use, unwanted pregnancy and and several choices kids make that lead to social problems.

In my work with the Presidential Task Force on Fatherhood and Healthy Families, we’ve discovered we don’t only have a fatherhood crisis in America, we have a masculinity crisis.

We’ve simply forgotten how to be men.

We’ve forgotten how much power we have to shape the lives of our own children.

If you’re a dad sticking it out with your family and your kids, THANKS.

And if you’re a father struggling through the tension to stay in your children’s lives after a separation, thanks for facing the tension because you love your kids.

It will mean the world to them in the long run.

Dad’s, in my opinion, you are the most powerful force in the lives of your children. Thank you for not being passive. Thank you for understanding and taking responsibility for your power.

Thank you for turning your power into love and commitment.

If you’d like to help with the crisis of Fatherlessness, one way you can do that is by buying your dad a more meaningful gift than a tie this Father’s Day. A program I started years ago, now run by John Sowers, works to pair fatherless kids with adult mentors and this is a perfect time of year to make a donation.

If you have a father who has been around and had a positive influence on your life, make one in his honor.

Happy Fathers Day!

A Message for Dads And Everyone on Father’s Day is a post from: Storyline Blog

Five Articles I Sent My Staff This Week

As a staff, we are committed to learning and growing, both professionally and personally. One of the ways we do that is by reading. Below are some of the most current things we’re reading together.

If you’re in need of something great to read this weekend, start here.

New Dad Survival Guide

via Art of Manliness

In honor of Father’s Day, and of our very own staff member Kyle Hicks, who welcomed his son into the world this week, I thought I’d share this article. Some practical and fun thoughts about being a new dad.

27 Words You Should Never Use to Describe Yourself

via Inc

The thing with words is that, as powerful as they are, they can also get tired over time. It’s important to think about the word you use to describe yourself or your company. Do they accurately portray who you are?

The Case for Scheduling “Me Time” into Your Work Day

via The Muse

I used to think I’d be more productive if I just powered through my workday, without taking a break. Now I know people need strategic breaks in order to accomplish their tasks.

7 Email Hacks That Will Make You More Productive

via Chris Ducker

We all know email can derail our productivity if we aren’t careful. And since we’re working to maximize productivity on our very creative team, I thought this list might be helpful.

The Right Time of Day to Work

by Claire Diaz-Ortiz

We do what Claire talks about here—blocking off certain times of day to do certain tasks. Morning, for example, is the time of day when you have most brain power, so that’s when we do our most intensive tasks.

Five Articles I Sent My Staff This Week is a post from: Storyline Blog

How to Cope When Life Changes Overnight

Summer is officially here. Families are packing up for vacation, chairs are becoming occupied at the pool, and friends are meeting to grill out. Yet, just months ago we were waiting on flowers to bloom.

And months before that we were wearing winter jackets.

It’s astonishing how quickly things change.

Weather. Goals. Dreams. Loves. Expectations. Interests.

Life can shift so quickly.

So what do we do when the seasons of our life begin to transform? How do we anticipate what is coming next?

Here are 3 ways to embrace life’s shifting seasons:

1. Don’t wear a winter jacket in summer.

Whether you are starting a new job, about to get married, moving to a different place, or just trying something new, there are things that you did before that you cannot carry with you into your next opportunity.

Be open to learning and taking advice from others.

Be open to letting go of things that don’t serve you anymore.

God wants to use the people, places and circumstances around you to bless and teach you.

2. Weather the storm.

I once read on the wall of a camping store, “There is no bad weather, only bad clothes.” This is as true in life as it is in camping. We often don’t know what the next season will bring.

Prepare for unexpected storms by putting on a hope that everything will work out for your good.

With this covering, you can withstand anything.

3. Trust in the transformation.

In the same way that winter fades into spring, spring heats up to summer, and summer will give way to fall, change must occur in our lives to give us new experiences.

Trust that whatever is or will happen is necessary for you to discover life to the fullest and that God has a plan for it all.

As this summer warms up, remember to embrace each moment because it is producing in you everything you’ll need for each season to come.

How to Cope When Life Changes Overnight is a post from: Storyline Blog

A Way to Stay Grounded When Your Dreams Are Shattered

I am pretty sure I was made to be a mother. I know not all women are, but I am pretty sure I was.

And yet, my journey to motherhood was a tricky one.

Soon after my husband and I started trying to get pregnant, I found out that I, in fact, cannot have children—at least not naturally. I am infertile. And like most things unexpected and tragic, the news shattered me.

Photo Credit: andreawilla, Creative Commons

What kind of a women was I if my very womanhood, the ability to bring life into the world, did not exist within me?

These were the painful things I worried to myself late at night.

What do we do when the very thing we think defines us is ripped from our grasp?

The news of my infertility left me broken to my core, as it is with the loss of all things in life that we hope for, plan on, define ourselves by. During this time in my life, the nights were especially dark, but the most important thing was I found that when the sun of a new day would shine through my windows, I was still me.

The pain was there, and the hurt was real, but the light that God was shining on me with each new day was revealing something new.

I was beginning to see the beauty that can only exist amongst the broken.

So often we have an idea of what we want and what is best for our lives.

What my infertility taught me is, when our ideas and hopes are taken from us, we can either sit in the despair, or take the shattered hopes and dreams and begin to piece them together in a new way. I quickly learned that although my fertility was dead, my ability to be a mother was still very much alive.

When we piece together our brokenness, a new kind of creativity is required of us.

My brokenness ushered me into motherhood in a way that has shaped me and made me who I have always longed to be. My inability to bear children led me down the path of adoption.

I am now the mother of three.

While my womb will forever remain empty, my arms will forever be full. My original idea of what is best for my life was greatly lacking, and I never would have known the fullness of my potential if not for the pain of the loss of my initial plans.

What is it in your life that you are allowing to define you?

What brokenness do you continue to sit in?

As the sun comes up with the gift of a new day remember that you are still you.

Remember that God is still good. Do not let what you think you need, or the brokenness you are sitting in, define who you are.

Let the healing sun shine on the shattered glass around you.

Pick up the pieces and begin to put them together in a new and surprisingly magnificent way. With each new piece, you will find the hurt begin to fade. What was once a broken mess can slowly, over time, become the beauty you have been longing for all along.

A Way to Stay Grounded When Your Dreams Are Shattered is a post from: Storyline Blog

The Unexpected Benefits of Being Stuck

Several years ago, I moved from the small farm town I grew up in to Portland, Oregon—and at first, I hated it.

How were you supposed to make friends when you moved to a brand new city? How did people in this city survive without the sunshine? And how on earth was I expected to keep my socks dry?

Photo Credit: Branden Harvey (Yes the same guy who wrote this post!)

It rained all the time. All. The. Time. And I was sick of it.

So I decided I’d move to California.

I made plans for the move and dreamed of what life was going to be like when I got there. The ever-present sunshine would bring people out their houses and onto the streets. I would bump into Bieber at the local cafe.

My socks would always, always be dry.

And there was a girl there I maybe liked.

Everything was going to be great.

The only problem was, all my plans fell through.

I tried to move to California. I Bob Goffed it. I sat outside of the offices of deans and presidents, begging for scholarships. I applied for loans. I looked for roommates and jobs. I did every possible thing I could do. But everything fell through. Nothing worked. I was stuck. My socks were still wet. I was miserable.

Oh, and the girl said she didn’t like me back.

But then something amazing happened.

I realized I had one of two choices. I could either sit around complaining about being stuck—how life was unfair, and if only this opportunity or that opportunity had worked out for me, things would all be different.

Or, I could decide to make my own opportunities and choose my own fate.

The first one sounded really boring, so I decided to pick the second.

First things first, I went out and bought myself some cool waterproof boots. Because sometimes the most frustrating problems have very simple solutions.

And second, I decided that I was going to make the most of my time in Portland.

I decided I needed a few real, authentic friends—the kind that don’t mind dropping you off at the airport at 5am and who visit you in the hospital.

So I started getting out there and meeting people. Lots of people. And I began investing in the people I met until I found people I connected with, who were investing in the people around them. around me as well.

I also decided I needed to do something with my time that would tap into my passion and also help me make some money.

I had always loved taking photos, so I kept honing my skills and taking every opportunity could as practice. I began networking with some other photographers and better opportunities kept rolling in.

The opportunities started rolling in faster and faster from names I’d heard of like: smart car, Timex, Chevrolet and PetSmart – all because I started reaching out to the people around me.

And guess what… I met a girl too. She even liked me back.

And still likes me back.

These days, Portland is my favorite city in the world.

Truly. I travel all the time. In just the last year, I’ve been everywhere from Israel to Rwanda. No matter where I go, I never lose my love for Portland.

I wake up every day filled with a passion for life. I get to do what I love. I have a small community of best friends who push me to grow on a daily basis. And the rain doesn’t bother me near as much as it used to.

Those little quirks become sort of endearing, after a while.

Commitment is something special.

It isn’t easy, but when you force yourself to commit to something, it changes the way you think about everything.

I think commitment is the reason I was able to get from where I was to where I am today.

Because I knew I was stuck in Portland, it forced me to look at my life differently. Nothing was disposable. Everything was an opportunity. And when I decided to choose to make my life what I wanted it to be, instead of complaining about how stuck I was, everything changed.

I’m happier than I ever dreamed I could be.

Today we get to challenge ourselves to look for the opportunities in our lives—to look for people, places and ideas we can invest in.

What choices will you make?

The Unexpected Benefits of Being Stuck is a post from: Storyline Blog

How I Learned to Go All The Way for What Matters

In the past five years, a few unexpected things have happened:

I learned I had a terminal brain tumor, was served divorce papers from the love of my life, and to top it all off, spent a drunken night where I accidentally knocked up my best friend.

It’s been a busy five years filled with pain, heartache, and shame.

Photo Credit: Alyssa L. Miller, Creative Commons

But at the end of these three tragedies, I am surprised to find myself incredibly thankful for my new life.

When I was young, I felt God telling me that I would take part in an amazing story.

And I would share that story with those around me in order to help them change their lives. It has been that pull, that promise, keeping me going through the past twenty years.

I just never imagined the source of that story would come through three miserable events where I was obviously the loser.

I suppose my story belongs in the folder called “in my weakness, He will be made strong”.

No matter how messed up your story seems, it is one worth living and telling.

God has indeed shown his strength in the middle of my unfortunate weakness.

So much so, that I feel this series of events has become my unique story to share with the world.

Only now do I fully understand why T.S. Eliot wrote, “The purpose of literature is to turn blood into ink”.

That cold prickly rawness is exactly how I feel as I take my first step from simply existing, to now, recalling and recording the previous five years of my existence.

I am ridiculously scared to take a step forward, but as Steven Pressfield repeatedly said in his book, The War of Art, the only thing I can do now is to push through this resistance.

Now is the moment I begin to put my story on paper.

I’m going to write the story I’ve known I’m supposed to write for years, called, Thank You Kung-Fu.

I know you can hear me.

I know you’ve felt these feelings before. And if I can face my fears of writing my story, I know you can overcome that single idea that keeps you up, night after night.

As I dive into my story, I encourage you to take one more small step forward towards your future project. Yeah, that single idea that makes you feel so vulnerable you want to burn it in the backyard.

The only help I can offer you is to utter this phrase by Ernest Hemingway as often as I have:

“Go all the way with it. Do not back off. For once, go all the goddamn way with what matters.”

______

From the Storyline team: David Wenzel is a good friend to all of us here at Storyline and we’ve been so inspired watching him fight his battle with Cancer and learn to live a great story. If you’re interested in knowing more about him, or in supporting him in his journey, you can Storyline Blog

Seven Things To Do While You’re Still in Your Twenties

My friend Bob, who is about ten years older than I am, told me recently that, at least in our culture, your twenties are about getting educated, your thirties are about accumulating resources (becoming financially sustainable), your forties are about building (families, houses, careers, ministries, impact) and your fifties are about enjoying what you’ve built (and perhaps pressuring your kids to get married and make babies)…

He did not intend this as advice. He was only making an observation.

But I tend to think it’s a pretty good path.

It takes time to build influence, to establish connections, and to build confidence in others at your abilities. Delay the process and, well, you are in what psychologists call “suspended adolescence.”

Most of my friends who are in their twenties are seriously ambitious and enormously accomplished.

Honestly, it’s hard for me to see twenty-somethings as kids

(unless we start talking about music, in which they trade in bands like children with baseball cards, hardly taking time to actually listen to the music! Call me an agist. I know I am an agist) but apparently the phenomenon is real. 20-somethings these days are taking longer an longer to grow up.

Photo Credit: erin leigh mcconnell, Creative Commons

So if you’re in your early twenties and it’s just after noon and you’re crawling out of the bed you grew up sleeping in, and surfing internet sights with a laptop on your belly, here’s some tips:

1. Lose your friends.

If your friends aren’t ambitious, if they don’t have clear plans, you probably won’t either. This doesn’t mean to reject them, but it does mean if your friends want to lay around doing nothing all day, get some new friends. The single greatest influence playing on you is your friends. You will become like the people you hang around.

2. Read books.

Try to read a book a week for the next six weeks. This alone will stimulate your mind and you’ll start being bored with being bored. You’ll want to explore ideas. Your conversations with friends will become boring. You’ll wonder how many more conversations you can have about what happened the last time you guys were drunk.

3. Write down your goals for the next five years, one year, one month and one week.

Do this now. If you don’t know what you want, that’s a very serious problem, so just write down anything and start moving. A body in motion stays in motion. It doesn’t matter if you change your mind later. You can’t change your mind about what you want until you start moving forward.

4. Ask your parents for criticism.

Criticism from people who love you is a gift and a blessing. It’s going to be hard to take, and the first thing you are going to want to do is criticize them back, but don’t do it. Just soak it in, then act on whatever they say. Nobody is perfect, but people who don’t accept criticism end up worse off in the end.

5. Accept hardship.

Hardship is part of every life, and God intends it to purify you and prepare you. If you reject hardship, you reject life.

6. Cut the cynicism:

Leaders don’t roll their eyes, children do. Is the Dave Matthews band so yesterday? Great. You and the kids in the high school cafeteria can talk about it all day. People work very hard to do what they do, and when you roll your eyes, you’re being insulting.

Children are insulting, adults appreciate craftsmanship over fashion.

That said, the last Dave Matthew’s record really wasn’t that bad.

7. Accomplish something.

Nothing builds true confidence like success. Want to be a filmmaker? Make a short film and enter it into a contest. Want to write? Write an essay and submit it to a journal. Pick something and practice and work until you’re good at it. You can only change direction if you are in motion.

And of course there are a million more. But this should get the ball rolling, or at least get you out of bed.

Seven Things To Do While You’re Still in Your Twenties is a post from: Storyline Blog