Hannah Farver's Blog, page 19

repentance.

I have risen from the dead.
 
Like Lazarus the stone-cold door was hurled from my tomb. If the door hadn't moved, the walls themselves would have exploded into dust, for I was awakened by the hands of God. He twisted all the bars and barbed wire and barriers like I would twist a rubik's cube. Everything fell apart.

Then there was only Him. And me, heart rattling in my chest like the scream of a newborn infant. [Alive.]

But what if Lazarus wanted back in the tomb? What if—like some mad man—years later, he was drawn back to what he had once been so glad to escape?

No, he would never. That'd be crazy.

I am crazy.

The New York Times reported earlier this year that sufferers of eating disorders will often relapse. It's not that they haven't recovered. It's that the weakness is still there.

That's true of everyone. We think we grow out of our sins, as if Achilles' feet could ever outgrow his heel. It's not true. Every sin we have grown to hate, we can grow an attraction to, if we do not keep the truth flushing our veins. If we do not throw ourselves on the grace of God, He may let us travel to a place where we will learn (again) how much we need Him.

Jesus promised, "Because I live, you will live also." It speaks of a closeness—an existence that depends upon the other. My existence depends on Christ.  

"There shall be no strange god among you; you shall not bow down to a foreign god. I am the Lord your God, who brought you up out of the land of Egypt," He said. "Open your mouth wide, and I will fill it."

He will feed us with honey, love, and holiness, to wash free the lies clotting in our hearts. He pours truth down our minds, and with the truth, sanity.

Moral of the story? We may not like to talk about it—it's frightening—but sometimes real, true Lazaruses crawl back to the tomb for another peek inside. Sometimes idols get footholds in Christian lives. It's wrong. It shouldn't happen. But it does. And Jesus' people can't ever fully live when that happens.

"Because I live, you will live." The way to joy is to bury ourselves in Him; to call a lie a lie; to be honest that we are no greater than we were seven or five years ago when He awakened us before. We still need sanctifying until the last shred of love for death leaves our souls.

But the power of God who began that life in us, is strong to finish the job. He twists tombs like rubik's cubes. He is in the business of rescuing us—for keeps.

"Spiritual sorrow will sink the heart if the pulley of faith does not raise it. As our sin is ever..."

""Spiritual sorrow will sink the heart if the pulley of faith does not raise it. As our sin is ever before us, so God's promise must be ever before us. As we much feel our sting, so we must look up to Christ. …If there are not some dawnings of faith in the soul, it is not the sorrow of humiliation but of despair.""

- Thomas Watson

He has overcome. It's happened. It's happening...

He has overcome. It's happened. It's happening...

Photo credit here.

Photo credit here.

Photo

metamorphosis

(Photo: A vintage fitness machine for shrinking the waist.)

I've talked about beauty before. Quite a lot, actually. Studying how different parts of the world view beauty has helped my perspective. (Seeing the Asian ultra-obsession with white skin and Mauritania's craze with obesity puts our own accepted-beauty ideals under scrutiny as well. Who says that our views of beauty are "normal" or right? What if our beauty-obsessions are as unrealistic as theirs?)

"Here in Korea, beauty is survival."

A friend, Rachelle, recently wrote me from South Korea. As a Caucasian American, she was shocked by what Korea considers beautiful:

"White skin, big eyes, small faces, and big noses. I have been living in South Korea since August 2010 and I have found that the concept of beauty goes much deeper… One way I can explain it is that here in Korea, beauty is survival. In order for women to succeed in their careers, they can't just be smart, they have to be beautiful, perfectly beautiful."

Imagine entering high school with different eyes than you've had your entire life. And maybe a different nose.

"There is a period in a Korean teenage girl's life called 'metamorphosis.'"

"In Korea, high school is incredibly rigid and stressful. Competition for entrance into the best universities is what fuels a four year cram session known as high school. University is a time for fun, dating, and really not a lot of studying. High school is not a time for any of these things. Schools place rules on high school girls about their appearance. They have to keep their hair short, wear no make-up, no jewelry, and must wear uniforms everyday. Teachers want these girls to focus on getting into the best schools and not even have to spend more than 20 minutes to get ready in the morning.

'Metamorphosis' begins right after high school. It usually consists of an eye surgery to create a 'double eyelid,' possibly a nose surgery, and definitely a rigid diet. After mom and dad have paid for these surgeries, girls are ready for college, dating, and job searching.

Plastic surgery is very inexpensive here. In cities like Seoul, almost all girls in their twenties have had them. One popular procedure that shocked me was where doctors break the jaw and push it back to create a smaller looking face.

'

(Park Min Young, one of Korea's most famous actresses.)

See? This too:

("Honey" Lee, Miss Korea 2006)

I honestly can't imagine living under the constant pressure of a culture that believes two or three plastic surgeries per person is normal. It seems absolutely crazy. And it is.

But put that alongside American beauty standards, like when Ralph Lauren got in trouble for over-photoshopping:

Maybe we're not so different.

ee cummings

lindzelia:

"Unbeing dead isn't being alive."

"‎Here are the two best prayers I know: 'Help me, help me, help me,' and 'thank..."

"‎Here are the two best prayers I know: 'Help me, help me, help me,' and 'thank You, thank You, thank You.'"