William Amerman's Blog - Posts Tagged "spring-of-deception"
Personification of guilt
...comes in a forty-four inch rod-like device. This implement cost $###.## before tax and was an impulse buy. It also hit a little white ball over 300 yards on the simulator. I actually left the store without buying it. Yes, me, bastion of wise economic choices. Even after ripping off all those towering shots.
However, three minutes later I pulled off the road into the Aqui Mexican restaurant parking lot and sat idling for a good ten minutes, weighing my decision, checking my phone for online reviews. After lurking like a predator in this dark parking lot, I couldn't take it anymore. I drove back to the store and told Daniel, the limping salesman who had first laid the filthy golf club in my hands with the words, "this bad-boy was born angry, man," that I would take it.
And now I have it. Only in real life and not on the simulator it does not hit the little white ball 300 yards. More like 270. Which is just about how my old driver performed. This fact is a bit distressing.
However, I console myself with the knowledge that Daniel works on commission, and I have surely made his week. In fact, once I summon the courage to tell the wifely half of our household, I think I will focus on this aspect of the commercial transaction. It is almost as if I've made a donation to charity. Yes, this will be the story in this, the spring of my deception.
However, three minutes later I pulled off the road into the Aqui Mexican restaurant parking lot and sat idling for a good ten minutes, weighing my decision, checking my phone for online reviews. After lurking like a predator in this dark parking lot, I couldn't take it anymore. I drove back to the store and told Daniel, the limping salesman who had first laid the filthy golf club in my hands with the words, "this bad-boy was born angry, man," that I would take it.
And now I have it. Only in real life and not on the simulator it does not hit the little white ball 300 yards. More like 270. Which is just about how my old driver performed. This fact is a bit distressing.
However, I console myself with the knowledge that Daniel works on commission, and I have surely made his week. In fact, once I summon the courage to tell the wifely half of our household, I think I will focus on this aspect of the commercial transaction. It is almost as if I've made a donation to charity. Yes, this will be the story in this, the spring of my deception.
