Roland Yeomans's Blog, page 16

Are We Capable of Love Any More?

 

The bronze mists of the haunted jazz club, 

Meilori's,

curled and creamed like

 

a dreaded thought 

trying to form  itself 

on the fevered edge  of consciousness.

"I fold," sighed the ghost of Ray Bradbury, laying his cards gently upon the rune-etched table.

"You folded your cards a long time ago," drily smiled the ghost of William Faulkner, 

"as our friend, Roland, almost did last Halloween."

"What month is it, anyway?" asked Ray Bradbury.

"It's a month away from Valentine's Day, sir," I smiled sadly having lost my Kathleen decades that seemed only months ago.

Faulkner laid down his cigar. "Your living friends these days are incapable of love."

"Here, I find myself standing outside the window of the storefront of humanity, still observing as a writer but unable to reach out and touch with fingers of new prose"

He shook his head.

"Because of the darkness in this world , the young man or woman writing today has forgotten the problems of the human heart in conflict with itself which alone can make good writing

 

because only that is worth writing about, worth the agony and the sweat of wresting something from nothing.

 

You must learn them again.  You must teach yourself that the basest of all things is to be afraid.

 

And teaching yourself that, 

forget it forever,

 

leaving no room in your writing for anything but the old truths of the heart,

 

the old universal truths lacking which any story is ephemeral and doomed - 

love and honor and pity and pride and compassion and sacrifice.

 

Until you do so, you labor under a curse.

 

You write not of love but of lust,

 

of defeats in which no one loses anything of value,

 

of victories without hope and,

 

worst of all, without pity or compassion. Your griefs grieve on no universal bones, leaving no scars.

 

You write not of the heart but of the sex glands."

He turned, "What do you think, Ray?"

The last breath of winter sighed down my spine, for Mr. Bradbury looked as young as a high school senior.

" What is Love? 

Perhaps we may find that love is the ability of someone to give us back to ourselves when we thought ourselves truly lost forever. 

Maybe love is someone seeing and remembering, handing us back to ourselves just a trifle better than we had dared to hope or dream we could ever be again.”

He turned to me. "What do you think, Roland."

"I think, sir, that it is, indeed, a dark world. 

But if we find love, we don't have to walk it alone. 

Because even if we lose the source of that warmth, its memory will light the way before us."

William Faulkner said, "You trouble me, Roland. You surely do."

"Me, too, sir. Me, too."

***

So, my friends, what do you think about love?

HOW TO KEEP ON WITH YOUR NOVEL

 

HAS IT ALL CAUGHT UP WITH YOU?

You're in good company:


Mark Twain  Mark Twain's brilliant authorship of American classics such as Huckleberry Finn 

might have had its roots in his tendency to depression. 


But this famous depressed writer also lived with a lot of family drama 


that could have contributed to his STRESS
 and depression. 

Depression's role with creative writing will also be a function of the individual writers,


 their personal history, their circumstances, and the nature of their depressions.

 Stephen King  Stephen King, a modern master of suspense and terror, has quite a body of work to his name. 

Yet his fame and talent didn't forestall the devastating effects of the drugs and alcohol 


he allegedly had been using to cope with ongoing unhappiness.

Substance abuse and alcohol use 


often play roles as people struggling with depression attempt to self-medicate. 


During those years, this famous depressed writer also produced some of his best-known works, such as The Shining, Pet Cematary, and Carrie.

 F. Scott Fitzgerald  F. Scott Fitzgerald and his wife Zelda were known for their glamorous and tumultuous lifestyle, 

full of wild parties, travel, and larger-than-life characters. 

The Great Gatsby remains his best-known work, 


but other novels such as The Beautiful and the Damned detail a lot of the same ground. 


Their glittering life had a dark side, punctuated by alcoholism and depression for both of them, 


and their legacy includes being famous depressed writers. 


HOW DO YOU KEEP ON WRITING DESPITE FEAR, DOUBT, & SELF-CRITICISM?
1.) ASK YOURSELF WHAT YOU WOULD DO IF YOU'RE WEREN'T AFRAID OR DOUBTFUL.

The mere act of doing usually makes the fear recede in just a few minutes.” 


Pretend, just for a moment, that rejection or failure isn’t the end of life as you know it.


2.) STOP INDULGING YOUR FEARS, DISCOURAGEMENTS, REJECTIONS, & DASHED DREAMS.

Much as we’re driven to write, we feel we must be in the mood – 


as if the clouds should part, the sun should shine and every possible interruption should be silenced

.None of that matters. Write anyway. 

Don’t think about how you feel or if it’s a perfect time to write 

or that you have a thousand other things to do. 


Write anyway. 

You have nothing to share and nothing to sell if there are no words on the page.



3.) REMEMBER THAT REJECTION ISN'T NECESSARILY ABOUT YOUR WRITING. 

You have to be totally dedicated to your writing. 


Forget about rejections – they’re a mandatory part of any career. 

A writer writes. 
If you feel you’ll keep writing even if you never get published, then you’re a real writer.

The markets want they want.  


Tastes will change.  You will grow as a writer if you do not give up.


4.) SEE PAST YOUR EXCUSES TO YOUR REAL FEARS

Writers need to look at their fears directly.


 Recognize them for what they are, 


and be honest with yourself about why you’re not moving forward with your writing goals.

This can be difficult because we give excuses rather than facing our fears.


5.) SET SMALL GOALS

Long-term goals are great for inspiration, but keep a list of small, attainable goals, too, 


and allow yourself to feel proud when you achieve them. 

Reward yourself for finishing a chapter or short story. 

Recognize that sending a few query letters to agents takes time, thought, and effort, 


and don’t discount the success.

HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED?

 Why Christmas Lights ...

and Nativity Scenes 



stay up until January 6th?

It has to do with the datecelebrated for when the 3 Wise Men arrived to greet the infant Jesus

It is known as Three Kings Day,the Epiphany, the 12th Day of Christmas

It also marks the official start of the Mardi Gras Seasonoften called Carnivalwhich comes from the Latin words carne vale, meaning "farewell to the flesh."

Which is apt for my new novel

Mardi Gras, Magic, Murder in 1947 New Orleans


Nuestra Señora de la Santa Muerte,  Our Lady of Holy Death is stalking the streets killing apparently at random.

Her Acolyte is stalking the shadows of the French Quarter

A maskedBall of the Undeadis held to entraphapless mortals.
 And the bomb that has been ticking in the midst of the cast of characters from Silhouettes in the Key of Scream  to Perchance to Nightmare to  Beware the Jade Christmas

Explodes in RAZOR VALENTINE
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07N75DRKC
Interested?

HOW TO FIGHT THE JANUARY BLUES

 

Empty bank accounts, tight waistlines, vomiting bugs, failed detoxes: (Guys, it's not a hangover.  It's called alcohol poisoning.)The post-holiday comedown is a well-dreaded condition. January, even at its best, has few redeeming features. {At least we in S.W. Louisiana have the Mardi Gras to look forward to.} Ah, last week: This time last week, it was a bright, crisp day heading to New Year’s Eve. Feeling optimistic about the months ahead, two-thirds of us made at least one resolution: to eat less, to drink less, to get fit. Yet, according to a survey by researchers at the University of Bristol, 88 per cent of us will soon break them. Half of us already have.  Ouch!  REASON ONE:Let's face it: most of us had a hard time of it last year.  We managed to pull it together somehow, put on the brave Christmas face --Now, we are smack at the beginning once more, looking at running the gauntlet all over again. REASON TWO:New Year's Eve can be a time of reflection, looking back over the last year ... or our whole lives -- and seeing all the plans and dreams cast aside on the shoulder of our life paths. 
So what can we do to get through the yblues?1.) Most important: make plans for the coming months.    Organize something you can look forward to.     Be creative: watch a movie; listen to music; go for a run.     The sun might not be shining – and the lack of sunlight is one factor that’s making us feel sad –     but get outside and swing yourself about a bit.      It’ll make you feel so much better. 2.) Positive Perspective is key.     Dress brightly – even for work.      Everything’s so gloomy and dull outside that it’ll make people happy to see someone wearing bright colors.      Find yourself frowning?  Force a smile.  Studies show that putting on a grin will unconsciously make you feel more up.
3.) Use the prevailing winds.     Last year was tough for you, right?  But you made it through!      It's seems impossible that sailors can move forward with the wind blowing against them, doesn't it?     How do they do that?     On a sailboat, wind blowing against the boat at an angle inflates the sail,      and it forms a similar foil shape to an airplane's wing, creating a difference in pressure that pushes the sail perpendicular to the wind direction. 4.) Your mind is your sail.     It determines the course you sail through life.       You must learn how to mentally "tack," a term sailors use to describe how they shift the sail so the wind blows into a different side of the sail.      There are people in this world that would give their left hand to be right where you are --      with the blessings you are too familiar with to be thankful for.     Your struggles have made you smarter, stronger, and more aware of what you can do. 5.) Take a moment to realize that you are still here.     And that is an extraordinary achievement given the pain that you’ve been through. 6.) Focus on what you're facing and what you're running from.      What is just one simple step you can take       to maybe move towards the problem rather than away from it?      When you step towards problems they shrink,      and they become more manageable. 7.) Be kind to yourself.     If you had a best friend in a similar situation, what would your advice be?     I bet it would be:      "Ease up on yourself, friend.  You've done a great job with a lousy situation."
I hope this has helped in some small way, your friend - Roland

WRITING TIPS and the PSYCHOLOGY behind them_IWSG Post

THERE IS ALWAYS REASON BEHIND MADNESS ... AND TRUTH, TOO

Something to remember in these political debates ... and in the wisdom given to us on how to write well.

WRITE SHORTER

Every extra word makes readers impatient in these short-attention span days. 
Got to keep checking on those FB posts, you know.
Write as if each word cost you 50 cents.  Shorter prose is more powerful.


SHRINK THOSE SENTENCES!


Tiny draws attention in this big world.
Long sentences make readers work too hard to get to your main point.  
Break sentences into bite-size ideas.  Be Hemingway not Longfellow.

PASSIVE IS THE NEW POISON 



Passive voice sentences hide who is acting, creating uneasiness unconsciously in your reader.  Not good!
Be the detective of your own sentences -- find out who is the actor in each sentence and link him to the verb.


ERASE JARGON. FOCUS ON CLARITY

Jargon and Tech words just make your readers feel stupid. Way bad.
It doesn't make you sound smart.  It makes you look as if you are talking down to your reader.
Tell your story as if you were relaying it to your mother or next door neighbor.  Tell the tale to make the most impact to the most people.

PUSH TO THE HEAD OF THE LINE




Move key scenes and insights up as close to the front of your novel, chapter, sentence as you can.
You are not making a case in a court of law where you have to lay a foundation fact by fact.
You have only a few sentences to get the readers' attention.  

Don't waste those few precious moments.  

Grab your audience right out of the gate -- at the first sentence if possible. CLUES 

Authors use foreshadowing to hint at future important events. 
Whether consciously or unconsciously,

readers pick up on these clues if they read and use them to make predictions about what will happen later in the story.

It creates tension and suspense, keeping the reader turning the pages. 

AND DON'T FORGET MY CHRISTMAS GHOST STORY 
 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07KQ8XMJR/

I have an Angel Provocateur
in this speculative fiction

NEIL GAIMAN & MARK TWAIN on the New Year to Come! IWSG Post

 

{Neil and his beloved dog, Cabal, who died in 2013.Neil said "I found him by the side of the road, and we rescued each other."}
“I hope you will have a wonderful year,

that you'll dream dangerously and outrageously,

that you'll make something that didn't exist before you made it,

that you will be loved and that you will be liked,

and that you will have people to love and to like in return.

And, most importantly

(because I think there should be more kindness and more wisdom in the world right now),

that you will, when you need to be, be wise, and that you will always be kind.

I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes,

then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself,

changing yourself, changing your world.

You're doing things you've never done before,

and more importantly, you're Doing Something.

So that's my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself.

Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes.

Make mistakes nobody's ever made before.

Don't freeze, don't stop,

don't worry that it isn't good enough,

or it isn't perfect, whatever it is:

art, or love, or work or family or life.

Whatever it is you're scared of doing, 

Do it. 

Make your mistakes, next year and forever.

Be kind to yourself in the year ahead.

Remember to forgive yourself and to forgive others.

It is too easy to be outraged these days, so much harder to change things, 

to reach out, to understand.

Try to make your time matter:

Minutes and hours and days and weeks can blow away like dead leaves

with nothing to show but time you spent not quite doing things

or time you spent waiting to begin.

Hug too much, smile too much,

and when you can ... love."





 {Samuel Clemens in 1867}

MARK TWAIN:

Territorial Enterprise, January 1, 1863

LOCAL COLUMN  -  NEW YEAR'S DAY

"Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions.

Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.

Yesterday, everybody smoked his last cigar, took his last drink, and swore his last oath.

To-day, we are a pious and exemplary community.

Thirty days from now, we shall have cast our reformation to the winds

and gone to cutting our ancient short comings considerably shorter than ever.

We shall also reflect pleasantly upon how we did the same old thing last year about this time.

However, go in, community.

New Year's is a harmless annual institution,

of no particular use to anybody

save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls, and humbug resolutions,

and we wish you to enjoy it with a looseness suited to the greatness of the occasion."

FIRST FOOT?

 

The shades of years past watch us.We, of the modern age, stumble and bumble our way,
sure of our sophistication and education.

But what if there are principles of which we are unaware that take no notice of our ignorance of them ...

only chastise us when we break them.



After all, gravity takes no breaks ...

it only gives them

Take "First Foot,"


a custom concerning the first visitor of the New Year to a home.

His function is to bring prosperity and good fortune for the ensuing 12 months to those he visits.


He comes just as soon as possible after midnight, bringing gifts which symbolize plentiful food, health, and wealth. Sometimes he carries an evergreen branch as a symbol of continuing life.

Strict rules govern the choice of First Foot:


Male always for he symbolizes the New Year.


No redheads need apply.



The luckiest representative is a dark-haired stranger, symbolizing a new year full of undiscovered mysteries.

An old form of First Foot has the visitor entering silently, greeted by none.


He goes straight to the hearth, laying the evergreen branch on the fire and a sprig of mistletoe on the mantle above.


Then, he turns and greets those living in the home, and festivities ensue.


I wonder what thought first visited the homes of our minds last year?

Did it symbolize the atmosphere, the temper of our thoughts for the remaining 12 months?

What thought do you think should first visit your mind this New Year? What First Foot will be your physical first visitor?


Can you remember who first entered your home last January? Did he or she reflect the luck and temper of the following 12 months?

Just thought it would be fun to think on these questions, Roland

WHAT WILL BE THE LAST THING YOU DO THIS NEW YEAR'S EVE?

 

What will be the last thing you do this New Year's Eve?

Or if it has passed, what was it?

What will be, or was, the last meal for you in 2018?

STRANGE NEW YEAR'S EVE BELIEFS

1.) IF YOU DON'T KISS SOMEONE AT MIDNIGHT, YOU WILL BE UNLUCKY IN LOVE ALL YEAR


2.) EMPTY CUPBOARDS MEAN THEY WILL STAY EMPTY ALL YEAR

I wonder if that goes for empty heads as well -- which would explain the politics of this last year!


3.) OPEN ALL THE DOORS JUST BEFORE MIDNIGHT

That is to let out the Old Year and let in the New Year will all its promise.

All the Democrats across America are not only flinging open all their doors tonight, but their windows, too!


4.) EAT 12 GRAPES AT MIDNIGHT

One for each month -- that is just in case you do not like cabbage and black-eyed peas!


5.) NO LOANS TONIGHT

A full wallet seems to give promise for a full bank account during the New Year!


6.) NO TEARS AT MIDNIGHT

Lest you have a year full of sadness.

HERE IS MY WISH  FOR ALL OF YOU TO HAVE  MORE SMILES THAN TEARS  THIS NEW YEAR!

LAST BREATH

 

“Your life, like snow, while ongoing masks your passage, when finished, marks your path.”– Darael


Labored breathing.  I’d heard the term often but only now realized the reason for it.  Every breath hurt as if I were giving painful, hard-won birth to it.

The dead are never far from us. 
They're in our hearts and on our minds and in the end all that separates us from them is a single breath, one final grasp for air

From just outside my hospital room door, I heard the nurse snap, “Mr. Evans, I can only tell you that your tenant is in guarded condition.”

“I just want to know how soon I’ll be able to rent out his apartment.”

“Mr. Evans, he may well recover.

“Ha. If that’s him breathing, he ain’t got long for this world.”

“Then, you have your answer, don’t you?  Please leave.”

There was a long silence followed by heavy steps heading away from my door.

A face of flint stuck in from a crack in the door.  “Did he bother you?”

I shook my head and wheezed, “He only bothers himself, nurse.”

Her face softened.  “How can you be so forgiving?”

I managed a weak smile.  “He has to live with himself 24 hours a day.  How can I not feel sorry for him?”

She sighed, shook her head bemused, and quietly shut the door.

By the dim mirror light, I tried to make out the plaque on the opposite wall.  It was an ornate rendering of Margaret Fishback Powers’ poem, Footprints.  
 I snatched back the snort before it cut me in two.

Others had lived worse lives I knew, but when the blows came for me, I never felt carried.  Never.   
My footprints had always been solitary, lonely ones.  Women went for the Bad Boy never the ugly, poor Nice Guy.

I could have become mean, bitter, but what kind of company would I have been for myself then?   
Better by far to give encouragement and a smile to those who entered then left my world.

I spasmed a series of wet coughs that cut me in half, bending me in a fetal position.  The world blurred, became black.  I blinked my eyes to clear them. 
It truly wasn’t worth the effort. I saw shadows moving in the corners of my room.  Though I should have been alone, I wasn’t.  

Words, feeling like mine but were not, slithered into my mind: ‘You will die alone, unloved, unmourned.  Yours was a worthless life.’ 

Maybe the words weren't mine, but were they speaking the truth? Were they?

“Enough!” softly rumbled a Voice above me from the back of my bed.  “Did you not hear the nurse?  He is in guarded condition.”

Wails of pain and outrage pierced through my mind.  Then, the Voice of distant thunders spoke but one word.

“Go!”

The inside of my mind suddenly was all mine once more.

I turned to see who had spoken.  Fingers of soft steel took my shoulder and stopped me.

“No.  Not just yet.”

“Who are you?  What were those voices?”

“The unlearned call them demons.”

“Ah, I’m not important enough for demons to fool with.”

There was a hint of laughter underneath the rumbling words.  “Then, perhaps they were bored.”

The laughter disappeared.  “If you are in the light, darkness will always try to extinguish you.”

The Voice sighed, 
“You, born of Eve, look back on your lives and those of others and only see a meandering trail that wanders into the light and into the darkness to things you only imagine are there.”

There was a strange blur in front of me, and I hushed in a painful breath.  The plaque was gone from the wall.   
Somehow, I knew that the mysterious speaker was holding it in his hands.

“Her heart was in the right place but her perception off-course … like all those whose blood is that of Eve’s.”

“Who are you?” I wheezed.

“Those with cloudy perceptions call me Archangel.”

“And are wrong?”

“And right.  Life for you of tainted blood can be confusing.”

“An Archangel?  I’m just small potatoes.  I’m not worthy of someone like you.”

The undercurrent of laughter was back.  “Really?  Remember what I said of flawed perceptions?”

A flurry of mists billowed in front of me and out of it floated a slowly spinning globe of the earth.  A breath smelling of cedar and honey blew over my shoulder.  The masking clouds wisped away.

Tiny spots of golden light dotted every continent, appeared in isolated places on the seas.

“What are those?” I asked.

“Footprints.  Your footprints.”

“No.  I never left this city, much less this country.”

“Oh, but you have.”

 “How?”

“There are Nexus Points in every soul’s life where a shared laugh, a compassionate word, a needed affirmation of another’s worth, or desperately needed money left anonymously in a mailbox can start a ripple of random acts of kindness whose wake goes on and on.”


Steel fingers softly squeezed my shoulder.  “Those acts became a way of life for you.   
So much so that they became a part of you … and a part of all those you touched and a part of all those they in turn touched.”

My breath just wouldn’t come anymore as the Voice whispered in my ear. 

“Just now, the nurse you think of as Nurse Ratchet, because of your forgiveness, is withholding a bitter retort to a small child whose heart would have been shattered by those harsh words.”

An elephant seemed to be sitting on my chest and an ice-pick stabbing deep into my heart.  It hurt so badly I couldn’t speak.  I choked.  I heard a wet rattling gurgle in my throat.

The Voice murmured, “One last soul touched by you.”

Steel fingers settled on my chest.  The pain disappeared.  All became honey-light.

The ghost of laughter was back.  “Boot Camp is over, good and faithful servant.  Now, the adventure begins.”

One life well lived is long enough.

Goodbye 2023

STRANGE TIDINGS ON NEW YEAR'S

 

Although many of us do not admit to it, we do believe or follow some superstition at one time or another.

Knock on wood?  

I do, usually have to resort to knocking on my head, the universality of plastics you know.

Have you known people to stop a dog from howling to prevent death or 

to get married on a rainy day to insure a long and happy marriage?

 New Year’s Eve also has its fair share of strange myths and weird superstitions 

that are followed by many around the world. 

Here are a few:

1. No sweeping on New Year’s day.  

They say that it is an ominous act and can sweep away the good luck of the entire family.

Well, why not? Anything that keeps you from the nasty chore of cleaning is welcome, right?


 2. Wearing new clothes on New Year's Eve.

 They believe that it ensures a constant supply of new clothes for the whole year to jazz up the wardrobe.


 3. No empty pockets
 
There are people who insist that one should take care to avoid wearing a dress with empty pockets on New Year’s Eve 

since it may be a sign of very low or no income in the year to come.


4. Say no to chicken
 
If you cook any chicken dish on New Year’s day, you will have monetary troubles for the rest of the year.
 
So now you know who is responsible for all your financial troubles this year… 

Colonel Sanders!


5. Don’t do laundry
 
They say that if you do your laundry, you will certainly wash off your luck or will face a year of hard work. 

Even more ominous, doing laundry on this day is also associated with facing a family member’s death.
 
What can I say? These myths sound like work-relieving fun to me!


6. Don’t cry, honey!
 
The wise men (and women) say that one should not be miserable on this day and neither should one cry because that depression will follow you in the year to come.

So, wipe away those tears and be happy! After all, it is a new beginning.

  
7. Be Scrooge on New Year's Eve!

You should not give your cash, ornaments, precious items or other valuable things to anyone

 on the first day of the year because it may be a sign that wealth will be flowing out in the entire year. 

So, hang on to your cash until January 2nd!

  
8. Make noise and hang a lemon at New Year's Eve.

Have you ever wondered why there are fireworks on New Year’s Eve? 

It is to scare away the evil spirits and evil thoughts. 

Even hanging a lemon in the doorway helps in warding off bad spirits.

* The First Foot of New Year has a whole post coming soon here. 

Do you know of any New Year's Eve superstitions?