Chris Hardwick's Blog, page 2173

Appreciating Richard Hatch and the Underrated BATTLESTAR GALACTICA ’78 Movie

Mention Battlestar Galactica and the common sentiment tends to be that the rebooted series was cool (except the ending), and the original was campy cheese. Not all of this thinking necessarily comes from the material itself; George Lucas and 20th Century Fox sued Universal over Battlestar Galactica‘s similarities to Star Wars, and star Richard Hatch, who passed away yesterday at the age of 71, spent so many years on the convention circuit pitching a reboot that it sometimes came off as desperate…though it worked in the end by ultimately getting him a new role on the remake.

And yes, the original TV series had its cheesy moments even before the 1980 “comeback” season that’s extremely difficult to defend. But that’s partly because it was never meant to be a regular series–the initial plan was for three TV movies. When the network and producer Glen A. Larson made it a weekly, the writers had to adapt quickly and on a lower budget, not always with the best results. But that original three-hour episode was eventually edited into a two-hour-long movie to help recoup some of the costs of the $7 million dollar pilot. And it is a legitimately great piece of sci-fi.

Is it derivative? Sure. Just as Star Wars borrowed heavily from Flash Gordon, Silent Running, The Hidden Fortress, and everything else George Lucas liked, Galactica has elements of Star Wars, Star Trek, The Twilight Zone, the Book of Mormon (the sacred book, not the yet-to-be-made musical), and a heavy dose of Cold War politics. If it is a Star Wars rip-off, it is maybe the best one… and I will argue that its classic theme music is almost as good.

So let us first applaud it for what it does better than any of its sources: introduce many characters very quickly, and in very definable ways, without ever feeling like it’s spoonfeeding you. Starbuck (Dirk Benedict) sweeping his gambling winnings into the crotch of his pants during an alert tells you everything you need to know about him, while the James Earl Jones-ish proclamations of Commander Adama (Lorne Greene) promptly establishes him as the righteous veteran and good guy version of Darth Vader. Treacherous Baltar (John Colicos) is instantly recognized as a sleazy appeaser, and his fall into downright evil is inevitable from there. Sweeping in to take his place is Ray Milland’s Sire Uri, an aristocrat who gorges himself at the expense of refugees and insists upon unilateral disarmament right up until the point that it ceases to benefit him personally.

Numerous other characters make lasting impressions, like jealous Athena (Maren Jensen), interrupting Starbuck’s secret makeout session, or loyal Colonel Tigh (Terry Carter), a straight-and-noble until he has to lie to his men, at which point he briefly becomes comic relief because of what we know of him already. There’s outcast “socialator” Cassiopeia (Laurette Spang), who reflects Starbuck’s free-wheeling nature right back at him in a more formalized way–yes, space-hookers were on TV way before Firefly. There’s best friend Boomer (Herb Jefferson Jr.), wearily yet willingly tagging along with his pals’ schemes. And yeah, we knew Boxey and Muffit were there to appeal to the youngest kids in the audience, but compare them to Jake Lloyd and Jar Jar and it’s clear which feels less like pandering.

Hatch had arguably the most thankless role of all amidst so many great characters: upon him was the burden of playing the straight-arrow good guy; a hero defined by being a loyal son, a good surrogate father, and the moral counterweight to the more roguish Starbuck. He played it the only way he could–with sincerity. When Boxey wished aloud that Apollo could be his dad, he was expressing the wishes of many youngsters in the audience. The Captain wasn’t just some white-bread generic goodie, but a man you knew would protect you.

And then there’s the conflict these great characters find themselves faced with, which still rings true today: Do you appease a ruthless enemy bent on your destruction when they extend a hand for peace, or do you automatically distrust? Star Wars had more of a liberal bent, with the Empire representing the Nixon White House in George Lucas’ mind; Battlestar Galactica’s Adama is a Reagan-ish foreign policy hawk by comparison, especially when we learn that the reason the whole war started is that humans felt the need to intervene in Cylon oppression of other worlds. And yet it’s a populist kind of conservatism that greatly distrusts the wealthy, most of whom end up pampered in a resort run by giant insects and prepared as food for their larvae. Eat the rich, indeed.

Yes, the Viper fighters look a bit like X-wings, and Apollo and Starbuck totally have a Luke/Han dynamic. But the influence didn’t all go one way. Have you noticed how much Imperious Leader’s altering of the bargain between Baltar and himself closely resembles the Vader/Lando deal that would appear onscreen two years later? To the extent that Ralph McQuarrie and John Dykstra worked on both series, there will obviously be similarities, though the Galactica is more Starship Enterprise than Star Destroyer.

Plus it looks amazing; the models still hold up better than far more recent films do. Veteran TV directors Richard A. Colla and Alan J. Levi may not have had Lucas-level gifts when it came to editing action, but little is ever unclear in the space battles, and the effects shots worked so well they were subsequently recycled in probably every episode. Just looking at those intergendered, four-eyed and dual-mouthed space Motown singers break my brain–I get hung up just trying to figure out how that makeup was done.

As a twentysomething film school grad viewing for the first time (granted, I knew every detail by then, as I owned the picture storybook in the pre-VHS era), I was transfixed. This was not the flying-bikes-on-the-freeway cheesefest people had been talking down for years, but a bona fide space epic, with a plot specific enough to feel like it related to current events but also classically scriptural in a way that made it timeless. If Adama was Moses, leading his people into the desert to find the promised land called Earth, Apollo was the worthy Joshua who would succeed him… the fact that he didn’t is one of many problems with Galactica 1980, but whatever. You don’t have to accept any of what came later as canon, because the beauty of the movie is that it does have enough closure to satisfy.

Image: ABC/Universal

LEGION Premiere Recap: Chapter One

Warning: Spoilers for Legion follow. Be forewarned. Shall we begin?

Okay, everyone. Deep breaths. This is real, and you are here, and that wonderful mind-bendy premiere episode of Legion just happened. In case you’re having trouble making sense of it, relax: we’re here to help.

Right out the gate, Legion doesn’t waste any time introducing itself to us: in the first few minutes we watch a hyper-stylized highlight reel of David’s life as he goes from happy child to troubled young man who appears to exhibit all the classic signs of paranoid schizophrenia–hearing voices especially.

After a pretty gut-wrenching suicide attempt (which, as it later turns out, might not have actually happened?), we pick back up with David (Dan Stevens) as he’s recovering at Clockworks Psychiatric Hospital, where he gets regular visits from his sister Amy (Katie Aselton), hangs out with his sardonic friend Lenny (Aubrey Plaza), and even finds himself a girlfriend: Syd Barrett (Rachel Keller), who doesn’t see how her compulsive desire not to be touched makes her certifiable. “What if our problems aren’t in our heads?” she asks during a group therapy session. “What if they’re not even problems?”

But although the pills keep the voices at bay, David still feels like his problems are pretty real. At night, he still has visions of a “demon with yellow eyes” who watches him on the periphery of his consciousness. Okay screw it, I’m just gonna put it out there. Is that Mojo????

In case you don’t know Mojo, let me sum up quickly: Mojo is an ‘80s-era X-Men villain who rules over a pocket dimension called the “Mojoverse” as a slave-driving dictator and reality TV producer (hmm, how timely!). Now, to be fair, there hasn’t actually been any confirmation that this is 100% Mojo. As a friend pointed out to me, it could also be the Shadow King, a being of telepathic energy with closer ties to Legion in the comics, although Legion‘s mysterious character’s yellow skin (and his role on a TV show, which would be beautifully ironic) feels way too obvious a visual cue not to at least be an allusion to Mojo, if nothing else. So for simplicity’s sake I’m just gonna go ahead and start calling him “Mojo” for the time being and there’s nothing you can do about it.

Anyway, back to the recap. Things are going well between Syd and David, presumably because they’ve both picked up a lot of cute ways to have a touch-less relationship from watching Pushing Daisies. But as adorable as they are, bad things are coming, because it turns out all the Clockwork scenes we’ve witnessed so far are flashbacks. In reality, present day David is being interrogated against his will in a facility full of armed military operatives, who know he’s a powerful mutant and are only keeping him alive to extract information from him about an “incident” at the hospital. So David explains just how everything went wrong.

On Syd’s last day at Clockworks, he can’t take the lack of human contact anymore and kisses her just as she’s being discharged, somehow causing them to swap brains. Yup, turns out Syd’s got some pretty weird mutant abilities, too. While stuck in David’s body she has no idea how to control his telekinetic powers, and ends up forcibly trapping all the patients in their rooms. Poor Lenny doesn’t quite make it and ends up eviscerated through a wall instead. Don’t worry, though—you don’t cast Aubrey Plaza in your show just to write her off half an hour into the first episode.

Eventually Syd’s powers wear off and the two revert back to their original bodies, but remain where their brains were located, meaning that David has unofficially been discharged. This isn’t actually a good thing, because now he doesn’t have access to the medication that kept his symptoms in check, and while at his sister’s house he starts to hallucinate that Lenny is there talking to him. Or is she a hallucination? The David Haller who exists in X-Men comics does tend to absorb the identities of people around him… perhaps that’s what’s happening here. Either way, she will henceforth be known as “Head Lenny,” because if Battlestar Galactica has taught me anything it’s that it’s good to be precise about multiple versions of the same character.

Speaking of which! In recalling the events of that day, David becomes convinced that his interrogator was there to pick up Syd, and this causes his powers to manifest by way of a pen thrust into the guy’s face. When he wakes up, the Interrogator (that’s seriously what IMDb calls him) has David’s strapped to electric cables in a swimming pool, and he’s gotten tired of holding the kid’s hand. He wants to know where Syd is right now.

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So back into another flashback we go, as David tries to figure out where Syd’s gone. Except we’re not the only ones in here—so is present-day Syd. She’s being projected into David’s memory, she tells him, and she’s about to bust him out. When he wakes up, David narrowly survives an attack on the facility by what I’m guessing is probably a band of mutants, because one of them is setting soldiers on fire and flinging them into the air like rag dolls. David remembers seeing this team outside at Clockworks that day, because they were there to pick up Syd, and now she’s here with them to rescue him.

But where are they going now? Guess we’ll have to wait until next week to find out. In the meantime, let us know what you thought of Legion’s season premiere in the comments below!

Images: FX Networks/Marvel

THE EXPANSE Recap: The Freshest Banger From Eros

Fair Warning: This recap contains spoilers for tonight’s new episode of The Expanse that may or may not blow up your favorite moon—you’ve been warned!

When The Expanse returned for its second season, it began by destroying the natural order, and in the opening of “Static,” it destroyed the Martian moon Deimos. No big deal, though. It’s so far away they can barely see it.

It’s also, you know, a declaration of war.

Avasaral (Shohreh Aghdashloo) kicked off the evening concerned about how Mars would respond (and the fact they hadn’t yet), debating with Errinwright (Shawn Doyle) about the merits of the attack as if she weren’t the one who sent him the target—just like a true diplomat. To which he reminded her of her own words: “Earth must come first.”

Mars’ lack of response (either military or diplomatic) was a good symbol for this episode, one that picked up the scattered chess pieces of the first two episodes and put them back on the board, warily checking to see whether they’ll still align along old lines.

As promised, Avasarala also pulled the trigger on contacting Colonel Johnson (Chad L. Coleman), committing a bit of light-to-moderate treason in the process. Her video message plea was a sincere call for unity in the face of a larger monster, and Johnson recognized its truth. Naturally, he’ll risk his own life to help her—it’s what the OPA does. And let’s face it: this is the new reality of The Expanse—factions that want to kill each other will have to reform in order to stop a war, which is a tough sell for foot soldiers pledging revenge.

For her trouble, Avasarala got a mysterious transmission with coordinates for a stealth vessel. What’s it for? Did Johnson send it? Could it be the proof, the tool she’s looking for to turn Earth and Mars’ weapons away from each other? Will it really matter with the moon already blown to bits?

Miller’s (Thomas Jane) actions created a rift between him and Holden (Steven Straight). Instead of listening to Dresden (Daniel Kash) prattle on about the Protomolecule during the satellite raid, Miller wasted him as the final act of his detective work. Obviously Miller wasn’t of the mind to play three-dimensional, diplomatic chess, but he may have doomed mankind because of his caustic sense of duty or payback or whatever he’s operating under. He told Johnson that he killed Dresden, not because the scientist was talking crazy, but because he was making sense. Nevertheless, it seemed like Miller was picking fights with the wrong people, and the stink covering him won’t wash off.

That shift put him into the orbit of a bottle, a hallucination, and the Belters, while Holden got a lovely suite all to himself. Miller also found religion and a Mohawk, exploring the Century Ship concept before telling Johnson he wants to go back to Eros.

 

Holden and Naomi (Dominique Tipper) debated Miller’s murder of a mass-murderer, but she couldn’t convince the big-thinking captain that it was more than petty revenge. Naturally, she went off to play some handball and hit the clubs while Holden led a team interrogating the only main scientist, Paolo Cortazar (Carlos Gonzalez-Vio), they pulled from the Protogen lab.

They started by trying to sympathize with him, recognizing the nobility of his original endeavor of trying to find cures because of his mother’s illness, but Paolo’s mind has been tampered in such a way that his empathy was completely eradicated. He didn’t care about his own mother’s death or the painful deaths of thousands.

How do you reach a man like that? Amos (Wes Chatham)–more than just a meathead–cracked the code by comparing the sociopath scientist to a child molester. Instead of putting him on the defensive, he excited his twisted passion, making him eager to spill details as long as he’s getting details in return. This was the dark trade-off they made: feeding an info-junkie as long as he gets them closer to the truth about the experiment and the Protomolecule.

So they played him a recording from Eros (which also happened to be the high notes of the coolest club banger on the Belt), and he revealed that the Protomolecule-riddled former humans of Eros are building something and counting down.

On the Martian side of the galaxy, Draper (Frankie Adams) was leading a team that’s coming apart at the seams. There was a skirmish in the training room, spurred by the light racism of someone questioning the loyalty of a teammate because of their heritage. It eventually escalated, and Draper punched out her own private, which led to a talking-to and the bad news that they’ve been put on farm duty even as war crests the horizon.

All of it was window dressing, though. It was quickly resolved with the Marines silently getting the band back on track despite the pre-bellum frustrations boiling over. They, like their storyline this week, are marching in place.

In a way, they find common cause with Alex (Cas Anvar), who spends the entirety of the episode retesting the mission that saw 25 people die–haunted by a failing that kept his comrade alive, but marred the success of the mission with gravestones. He’s striving to perfect something that’s already passed. To get something right that can never be fixed. Like our fight-hungry Martians and the seemingly unhaltable war, he is another time bomb waiting to go off. The question is whether a cool head can bring him (and galactic violence) back from the brink.

SOME SPARE THOUGHTS:

How do you destroy an entire asteroid? It’s gotta be easier than killing a moon, right?
Could Miller have given himself that same haircut sober?
How long was Alex playing that flight simulator in real time? A day? A week?
We’d all jump at the chance to do the Generation Ship thing, right? Just me?

Images: NBC/SyFy

THE 100 Recap: ‘Heavy Lies the Crown’ Continues Bellamy’s Redemption Arc

Warning: the following recap contains spoilers from Wednesday’s episode of The 100, “Heavy Lies the Crown.” It is a recap, after all! You’ve been warned…

One of the best parts of The 100 is when The CW series expands its dynamic, post-apocalyptic world via the Grounder clans. Because the ensemble cast is so large and the story so extensive, this only happens in small bits and pieces when it’s applicable to the high stakes, fast-paced central storyline of the past three seasons. So it was extremely unique that season four episode 2, “Heavy Lies the Crown,” opened with no recognizable characters or places at all. Instead, the hour opened with a completely never-before-seen Grounder family out on some random farm, far away from Polis or Arkadia, dealing with both ALIE’s mind control and the bloody devastation she left in her wake only nine days earlier when Clarke destroyed the City of Light. The only Grounder from that family who survived was the son Ilian, and as he awoke from his mind control to find his family murdered, he blamed Skaikru for everything he lost.

And as we learned over the course of this season thus far: a lot of people blame Skaikru for ALIE and everything that’s happened since.

Over the past nine days, Ilian made his way to Polis where he joined up with other angry Grounders, ready to stage a coup against Roan after he allied with Skaikru. But thanks to Octavia spying and using her newfound assassin skills, that coup never happened and Roan kept his throne. He didn’t seem too happy about Octavia going off script and killing whomever stood in her way, though. Something tells me that we’re heading for Roan/Octavia showdown (or passionate romance. Or both—and let’s be real knowing this show it’s probably both).

Meanwhile, in Arkadia, the Adventure Squad realized they couldn’t stop the impending radiation wave. To which we say: duh, guys. The harder question was how to survive it. Their only hope was to find a safe haven to ride out the storm in, and Monty’s brilliant idea was to recycle an old one already prepped for high levels of radiation—the Ark! If they seal it up and fix all the damage from the crash landing, it could save them from another radiation apocalypse. But in order to live inside it and have usable water, they needed a hydrogenerator from the Farm Station …the piece of the Ark that crashed in Ice Nation territory. Bellamy led a rescue mission to Farm Station but they were immediately captured by Ice Nation warriors who had moved into the space station and started using it as a slave prison, including some missing Skaikru members. Now that was a truly heartbreaking twist.

The dilemma became whether the rescue mission should save the irreplaceable machine they needed to survive the apocalypse, or the people they found upon their arrival. That would involve using the hydrogenerator to blow up Farm Station—not exactly an easy call to make. Enter: Bellamy and the tough choices. Choosing their captive people over the greater good certainly proved one thing: He’s clearly still trying to make up for his past sins. Understandable, but did risking the future of everyone for 25 prisoners make sense? Was it worth it, if those 25 are still doomed to die along with everyone else now that they don’t have a viable way to survive the apocalypse inside the Ark? Clarke and Raven don’t think so, but Bellamy doesn’t regret his choice. That’s a first!

Clarke, meanwhile, won’t be satisfied until she comes up with a plan that saves everyone, not just Skaikru. She wants to save all the Grounders too, and they won’t all fit in the Ark, so she’s not putting all her eggs in that basked for now. Raven convinced her the only way to come up with a viable solution to save everyone was to tell everyone the truth about the incoming apocalypse to crowd source the issue. Jasper then proved that by showing Clarke her way of thinking was a lot like the adults on the Ark sending 100 kids down to Earth before coming clean about the Ark failing, so she gave a rousing speech to Arkadia, inspiring them all to have hope and work hard to make the Ark ready for the apocalypse … but she didn’t tell them about only 100 of them getting to live inside it when the end came. “We save who we can save today,” Bellamy told her. It’s basically The 100‘s version of one step at a time.

Other notable moments:

– Kane and Abby are done wasting time, y’all! (Also: Aw!) FINALLY. Three seasons of flirting was enough! They’re officially in the adult sleepover phase of their relationship, and Abby even retired her old wedding band from her first, late husband as a sign of her commitment to her new relationship. But Kane sweetly told her she didn’t need to do that for him, and she didn’t: she did it for herself. She’s also planning on leaving Polis (and Kane, though only temporarily) to return to Clarke. Time for some mother/daughter bonding! I could not be more excited (although I’m sad Kane and Abby have to separate).

– Newly-cheerful Jasper is almost creeping me out. But is such a nice change of pace to see him not trying to kill himself every other episode.

– Monty got revenge on the Ice Nation warrior who killed his father, but not by killing the man himself. He freed the slaves and let the slaves do the killing for him. That was a pretty mature, evolved choice. His hands remain clean but revenge was still served. Nice one, Monty!

– Octavia has become so skilled at being an assassin that she can now quickly and efficiently kill without leaving any trace of foul play. Dayum. Do not get on Octavia’s bad side.

– Without the hydrogenerator, the Ark will only sustain life for 100 people. Deja vu, anyone? The decision on who gets to live and die rests on Clarke’s shoulders, and I do not envy her one bit.

What did you think of this week’s The 100? Tweet me @SydneyBucksbaum!

Images: The CW

The 100 airs Wednesdays at 9 p.m. on The CW.

THE MAGICIANS Recap: ‘Divine Elimination’ Really Went There with [SPOILER]

Warning: this recap contains spoilers from Wednesday’s episode of The Magicians, “Divine Elimination.” It is a recap, after all. Don’t say we didn’t warn you …

Whoa. The Magicians just went there. They actually did it. Even though book readers knew Alice became a niffin in the Lev Grossman’s books, I have to say I was still doubtful they’d go there on the Syfy show, especially so early. But it happened, in only the third episode this season, “Divine Elimination.” It really, truly happened. I’m still in shock, so let’s recap all that happened before the final scene to give me some time to process my feelings, okay? Okay!

Well, the Beast certainly wasn’t joking about putting a curse on the Fillorian throne room. As soon as all the royal butts touched down on their respective thrones, Quentin, Alice, Eliot, and Margo immediately were wracked with paranoia and began planning the murders of the other three. Thankfully, Penny – the only non-royal – saw what was happening and teamed up with Eliot’s new wife Fen to figure out a way to save them all and break the curse. Unfortunately, he couldn’t do that before Margo unleashed her Cacodemon on Quentin, so he had to sacrifice his own so the two Cacodemons could kill each other and not any of the magicians. And Alice later told the crew she let hers go earlier because she couldn’t stand the thought of it being trapped (aw, Alice). So now they’re down three Cacodemons before they even came face-to-face with the Beast, and the royals were still all trying to kill each other. Things were going well!

Penny’s genius idea to break the curse was to let it run to completion … aka killing all four royals with injections of Potassium Chloride to stop their hearts and then adrenaline to kick start them back up. Not bad! Who would have thought old-fashioned human science could save the day in the magical world like Fillory? It worked, and during their post-curse pow wow they decided to use a first year shield charm spell to help them kill the Beast, blocking them from Alice’s Rynaman Ultra blast. Hmm, does that sound a bit like Harry Potter using Expelliarmus to kill Voldemort? Hey, if it worked for Harry, why not?

Meanwhile, Julia and Marina set up a “fox trap” to lure Reynard so the Beast could kill him. But the Beast teleported him and Julia away before Marina finished the summoning spell so they could follow Marina home, since he knew Reynard wouldn’t just show up somewhere that had Julia’s scent. Unfortunately, that also meant leaving Marina without any protection, so by the time they got to her apartment, he had already started eating Marina alive in a truly horrifying way. But then the Fillorian crew picked the worst possible moment to begin their attack on the Beast, and Penny teleported the Beast (and Julia) out of Marina’s apartment mere moments before that unholy trinity was about to kill Reynard. Gah, they were so close!

In the Fillorian forest, the quintet’s plan was also about to work: Penny teleported the Beast into the middle of their circle, Alice created the Rynaman Ultra and Quentin, Margo, and Eliot threw up a shield spell to contain both the Beast and the Rynaman blast. But Julia refused to let them kill the Beast before he could help her, so she stood in the way, and Quentin dove to get her out of the way of the blast. Since the shield dropped when Quentin stopped casting, Alice faltered in throwing the Rynaman and missed: it only blasted the side of the Beast’s fact and arm. Alice tried to throw it again but the Beast disappeared.

When the group started arguing with Julia, Penny lost his patience and teleported her back to NYC. She ripped off his wrist chains in revenge, and his hands started teleporting him everywhere … and then nowhere. Uh oh. Where did Penny go?! Back in Fillory, Quentin and Alice tried to get to the magical wellspring before the Beast drained it to heal himself while Eliot and Margo split off to petition Ember for more of his “god juice” (ew) in case Alice’s ran out before they got to face off with the Beast again.

At the wellspring, the Beast was outraged when he arrived only to see Ember taking a dump in it. I’ll just present that without comment. At least now the Beast couldn’t power back up, leaving him vulnerable … but not powerless. He tried to slice Alice in half but Quentin jumped in front of the spell, almost severing his arm. As she looked down to see Q bleeding out, that pissed Alice off, and she launched her rage assault on the Beast just as Eliot and Margo arrived on the scene. She tried to throw the Rynaman again but her juice finally ran out, and since she wasn’t controlling her emotions, the magic destroyed her from the inside, burning her alive in blue fire. Quentin, Eliot and Margo knew exactly what that meant, and so did we.

Just as the Beast tried to finish off Quentin, Alice reappeared as a vengeful, powerful, emotionless niffin, telling the Beast she did that on purpose to become powerful enough to kill him. She calmly froze him and literally ripped him apart as hundreds of moths flew away. She did it! She killed the Beast! But now … she’s a niffin, so, you know … that’s not great. She immediately turned on the other three, and Quentin, in pain and his heart breaking, let his Cacodemon go free to kill her, saving Eliot, Margo, and himself. But all he could do after was just cry in Eliot’s arms and Alice’s body lay dead and cold next to him.

And back at Marina’s apartment, since Julia had dropped the god-killing knife, Reynard got a hold of it. Julia arrived back only to find Marina dead and bloody on the ground, with no knife or god around. Her response about summed it up: “F-k.”

MAGICAL MUSINGS:

There’s no way Alice is really dead, right? She niffined out for only like a minute. It’s not so much of a stretch to say we haven’t seen the last of Niffin Alice.
I don’t know the proper way of pronouncing “usurpers” either, Eliot, don’t worry. I don’t think anyone really does.
I’m pretty sure I could have watched an entire hour of the four royals acting out the curse while Penny could only look on with a mixture of horror and annoyance. Major props to Arjun Gupta, Jason Ralph, Oliva Taylor Dudley, Summer Bishil, and Hale Appleman for their stellar and hilarious acting in all those scenes. I mean, the brilliant, laugh-out-loud twist when Penny learns Margo was actually the first one to be cursed when he thought she was the only one seeing reason? Ugh I love this show.
I can’t decide what’s funnier: the four royals trying to convince Penny to help each of them kill the other three or their genuine confusion and outrage whenever Penny wouldn’t go along with their sound, logical plans.
Marina’s warning that someone with the ability to “freeze” a god could also potentially break an “unbreakable” word-as-bond spell is definitely important, right? That means Julia shouldn’t be so confident in her agreement with the Beast.
In trying to scare Marina, Reynard did a pretty f-king good job when he turned her cat Cupcake inside out … and the poor cat was still alive. Oh my god. I had to pause right here to gag and let out a few tears at the same time. That might be the cruelest, most disturbing thing I have ever seen on TV. As if Reynard wasn’t absolutely terrifying enough before, he sure as s-t is now.
Hearing Quentin use an anology of “dicks” while trying to explain why Alice’s plan would work was pure magic. Really, really genius.
Quentin’s confession that he was going to try and win Alice back after they killed the Beast was heartbreaking in how honest and raw and real it was. He argued that they both had grown and become different people since they first got together, and he hoped he would get the chance to prove that he could be better and actually deserve her. But now he’ll never get the chance. *Sob!*
Ember. S-t. In. The. Wellspring. He s-t in the wellspring! He s-t! In the wellspring! Oh my god.

QUALITY QUOTES:

Eliot: The spell that won World War II is called the Rynaman Ultra? It sounds like a not-so-great beer.

Quentin: Fine, it’s a beer, but it’s a beer that we can use to kill the Beast.

Eliot: Meanwhile Penny comes back with cool, circa 1985 wrist chains …

Penny: Yeah, super cool how they keep me from killing myself.

Eliot: And then Dean Fog gives you all matching tramp stamps?

Alice: I thought tramp stamps were supposed to be on our lower back?

Eliot: God, I feel like I missed out on some crazy party you’ll be talking about for the rest of your lives.

Eliot, showing off the newly cleaned throne room: I missed you all … and I was bored.

Margo, after Eliot was the first one to show paranoid signs of the Beast’s curse: He got like this on shrooms once.

Penny, trying to reason that Eliot wasn’t cursed: Or maybe it was just some primo Fillorian shit that went up his nose and he’s on the bad end of a trip because he’s him.

Penny, frantic: Margo, we’ve got a serious problem!

Margo, slightly annoyed: I know, Eliot’s cursed.

Penny: No, no! Not just Eliot. Alice and Quentin too! Listen, whatever you do, do not sit on your throne, okay?!

Margo: Ugh, fine, whatevs. I have a plan. You going to help me pick these?

Penny: What’s this, an antidote?

Margo: Exactly. For the poison.

Penny: For the … what?!

Margo: For the poison. I have to drink it first or I won’t get Eliot to take it. Jesus. You’re acting like this is your first regicide. Also, it’s not the thrones that are cursed. I sat on mine and I’m totally fine.

Penny: … You sat on your … F-k! Great! No, it’s good. S-t.

Quentin, aiming a crossbow at Margo: What’s so funny?

Margo: You with a crossbow. You couldn’t hit a fat girl with a fat girl-seeking arrow.

Eliot rolling his eyes at Penny’s syringes: Oh goodie, heroin. I always suspected this was how I’d go.

Reynard: Is anyone even going to miss you?

Marina: I tip the pizza guy pretty well.

Penny watching Margo involuntarily inject herself after killing Quentin, Alice and Eliot: Now that is one thorough f-king curse.

Fen: Is it wrong to say I find her death extremely satisfying?

Margo: Well if those horses can get us there before the Beast, I’ll glady f-k them both.

Eliot: Hey, shh. Careful. Volume. I think those are talking horses.

Margo, checking them out: Offer stands.

Quentin: I feel like we could die in an hour and that’s giving me a lot of clarity.

Ember: I’m leaving. I’m going. I just had one or two things to do. Mainly number two. I have … befouled the wellspring.

The Beast: Pardon me?

Ember: I have left my divine elimination in the fount of all magic. And it’s a stinker. I really hope you weren’t planning to drink from it, it’s hardly potable.

The Beast: You … you what?!

Ember: Left my … leavings! A godly floater. Behind. In the wellspring.

The Beast: …

Ember: I pooped in it. Am I not making this very clear?

Quentin: Ember actually took a s-t in the wellspring? Well, that can’t be good for Fillory.

What did you think of this week’s episode of The Magicians? Tweet me your thoughts and opinions at @SydneyBucksbaum!

Images: Syfy

The Magicians airs Wednesdays at 9 p.m. on Syfy.

Buffy, Leia, Leslie Knope, and More Personify the #ShePersisted Memes

“She was warned. She was given an explanation. Nevertheless, she persisted.”

If you’ve been paying attention to the current political climate in the United States, you’re likely familiar with the words above from Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell. For the rest of you, the basic jist is this: during the Tuesday night debate over now-confirmed attorney general Jeff Sessions, Senate Republicans voted to rebuke Senator Elizabeth Warren for what they viewed as a attack on Sessions’ character after Warren attempted to read an old letter from the late Coretta Scott King, civil rights activist and widow of Martin Luther King, Jr., who had previously spoken out against Sessions’ nomination for federal judge in 1986. Shortly thereafter, a male counterpart of hers read the exact letter uninterrupted.

It was a moment that resonated with many women—and the justification by McConnell quickly became a rallying cry. So, naturally, the internet didn’t let the quote go to waste, pairing it with images of the most inspirational female characters, and we couldn’t help but round up some of our favorites below to remind all women that sometimes you must persist in the face of resistance.

Like this one of Leia and Darth Vader:

She was warned. She was given an explanation. Nevertheless, she persisted. pic.twitter.com/ebXJRX23Re

— Marc (@MarcSnetiker) February 8, 2017

And hero to rogue Parks Department employees everywhere, Leslie Knope:

Nevertheless, #ShePersisted pic.twitter.com/WPYgjanp7Q

— #nastywoman, phd (@ppyajunebug) February 8, 2017

But they didn’t stop there, with fandom mash-ups and fan art making an even more powerful statement:

#NeverthelessShePersisted pic.twitter.com/8QkTcGMy31

— Rebecca Eisenberg (@ryeisenberg) February 8, 2017

If you strike me down I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine. #ShePersisted pic.twitter.com/f6SBpQ9XLf

— A. Fannin (@junimae84) February 8, 2017

Nevertheless, #ShePersisted pic.twitter.com/ST4HM2NBb9

— Riley (@rileyisokay) February 8, 2017

Nevertheless, #ShePersisted. pic.twitter.com/iGDdraZTvp

— Whovian Feminism (@WhovianFeminism) February 8, 2017

She was warned. She was given an explanation. Nevertheless, she persisted. pic.twitter.com/YOjmqIuouh

— Alex Segura (@alex_segura) February 8, 2017

#Resist #ShePersisted pic.twitter.com/YUrkYGBDRs

— Geeks OUT (@GeeksOUT) February 8, 2017

She was warned. She was given an explanation. Nevertheless #shepersisted. ~ I feel like I could live in this whole brand. #WynonnaEarp pic.twitter.com/eilaDgEDoO

— Emily Andras (@emtothea) February 8, 2017

"She was warned. She was given an explanation. Nevertheless, #ShePersisted." #LetLizSpeak #HarryPotter @jk_rowling @SenWarren pic.twitter.com/FDPwNWKqcM

— Jen Juneau Haupt (@wordswithjen) February 8, 2017

Today's #Art365 #ShePersisted pic.twitter.com/rO3IxNadET

— The Kale Online (@TheKaleOnline) February 8, 2017

Regardless of your personal politics, there’s no denying the power in seeing these images when combined with some of our favorite characters rising above oppression. If you’re interested in repping this statement on a physical piece of clothing too, graphic designer Matt Rudinski has created a “Nevertheless, She Persisted” t-shirt you can buy. (All proceeds benefit Planned Parenthood.)

Have you seen other great examples of fictional female resilience that fit this quote? Feel free to let us know in the comments!

Featured Image: 20th Century Fox

Inked Wednesday #122 – Baby Groot, Superman, and More by Brian Lejman

Brian Lejman is a tattooist and manager at Premier Tattoo in Louisville, Kentucky, and he has completed more than a few pop culture-inspired tattoos in his career. Books, films, comics, music—he’s made tattoos from all sorts of mediums come to life for his clients. I’m particularly taken with this little Groot:

Groot (Guardians of the Galaxy)

Pop down to the gallery below to see more of Brian’s ink—You’ll find a lovely books and tea combo, a pug David Bowie tribute, Batman and Superman, and more. You can keep tabs on his portfolio by following him on Instagram, and if you’re local to Louisville, Kentucky, you can make an appointment with him at Premier Tattoo.

Oh! I have a side note before we wrap up: if you haven’t seen the human zoetrope tattoo, please visit this post and be amazed.

If you have nerdy ink on your skin or you’re a tattoo artist that applies pop culture, STEM, music, or other nerd-inspired ink (the spectrum is broad, folks) on a regular basis, then please hit me up because I’d like to highlight you in a future Inked Wednesday gallery. You can get in touch with me via email at alratcliffe@yahoo.com. Send me photos of the tattoos you’d like me to feature (the higher resolution, the better) and don’t forget to let me know the name of your tattoo artist if you have it, as well the name of the shop he or she works out of. If you are the tattoo artist, give me links to your portfolios and/or Instagram accounts so I can share them with our readers.

Images: Brian Lejman

Bandai’s New STAR WARS Model Kits are Crazy-Detailed

It would appear, much to the surprise of nobody, that Bandai‘s line of insanely detailed Star Wars model kits (that can be put together by anyone from amateur to expert) was a success. Who’d have thought, right? And you know what that means: more! Toy Fair’s coming in a couple of weeks, but Bandai’s U.S. distributors at Bluefin couldn’t wait, so they want you to check out every little detail right now.

The second wave includes a 1/72 scale Y-wing, TIE fighter, and Darth Vader’s TIE advance; 1/48 scale Snowspeeder and AT-ST Scout Walker; and 1/144 AT-AT, Slave I, and Millennium Falcon (Episode VII version).  Each vehicle kit is sold separately, and some of the special features include choices of alternate canopies, moving parts, detailed display bases, laser effects (I believe the technical term is “pewpewpews”), and more! Check out the tiny li’l Boba Fett and frozen Han in the image above to really appreciate the level of detail and thought put into this.

And this AT-AT may be the first ever toy version that can be posed in the slumped forward position post-tripping. (!!!)

Best of all, Bandai’s color-injection molding process means you don’t have to paint these kits if you don’t want to; if you’ve never put together a kit before, you can enjoy them just as much as the customizers who will want to add their own additional details. They do recommend you buy a nipper or sprue-cutter to fully separate the pieces from the frame, but no glue is required.

Check out the extensive gallery below for all the minute detail each vehicle sports. Prices range from $28 (TIE) to $50 (the Falcon), and the instructions will be printed in English for the American market. They’ll be released throughout the months of March and April.

Are you ready to play with Star Wars in a whole new way? What vehicles should they do next? Give us a comment below and tell us your faves.

Images: Bluefin/Bandai

Watch LEGO BATMAN Sing His Own Theme Song

On February 10, The LEGO Batman Movie will hit theaters and unleash its titular Dark Knight into a brand new adventure that will force him to face most of his greatest foes. But unlike some Batmen, this Caped Crusader fights evil with a song in his heart…it’s just not a very humble song.

Via ComicBook.com, an extended clip from The LEGO Batman Movie features Bruce Wayne’s alter ego making short work of his collective enemies while singing his own praises in the opening theme. Much like the film itself, Batman‘s song features a few callbacks to earlier eras, including the ’60s Batman TV series.

Perhaps because of his overpowering success, LEGO Batman proves to be a bit of an egomaniac in this clip. That said, this is one of the few times that we’ve seen any Batman so thoroughly own the Joker, and it’s almost impossible not to laugh at the casual way that Batman dismissed the Clown Prince of Crime as being less significant than Bane or Superman, two rivals that he actually pays attention to.

Fans have already met this Batman in The LEGO Movie, so everyone should know what to expect from him. The amazing thing is that this film will feature the first completely intentionally hilarious Batman on the big screen in over six decades. Maybe that’s what Batman needs right now. Between Christian Bale’s Dark Knight and Ben Affleck’s somehow even darker knight, Batman fans deserve a reminder that there’s more to this icon than unrelenting darkness. LEGO Batman may be a jerk, but he’s still the hero that LEGO Gotham City deserves.

What did you think about this clip from The LEGO Batman Movie? Let us know in the comment section below!

Image: Warner Bros. Pictures

What about that other Batman movie?

MARVEL’S AGENTS OF SHIELD Recap: Everything Goes “BOOM”

Warning: This post contains spoilers for Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.! Proceed with caution, agents. If you haven’t yet watched this week’s episode, “BOOM,” we highly suggest you do so before proceeding. Okay? We good? Then let’s go.

More and more, it’s evident that S.H.I.E.L.D.‘s secret weapons this season are its new players. While the show had quality guest stars and recurring performers in years past, almost all in the current batch are no less than compelling.

We care about Mace, about the fact that he’s a decent man trying to work within a deeply flawed system to make a difference, to be more than “team mascot.” And—as we learn this week—that he’s more than willing to kill himself for the greater good. (Even if he tends to use one to many football metaphors along the way.) In some ways he’s reminiscent of Chris Hemsworth’s Thor in that he’s a huge hunk of hero with whom it would be hard to sympathize if he wasn’t played by a solid actor who’s unafraid to show the chinks in his character’s armor.

We also care about Aida, who—like so many AI’s in science-fiction history, from Data to the Iron Giant—has rapidly evolved beyond her programming, to feel as well as think, and experience all the negative emotions that come with developing a distinct personality. She’s essentially going through adolescence and discovering she’s not unique, hardly fun. Since it turns out Radcliffe based her on his ex-lover Agnes, whom he left when she developed an inoperable brain tumor.

The biggest accomplishment of “BOOM” is that it makes us care an awful lot about Agnes, a woman we’ve just met and already feel tremendous pity and respect for, determined as she is to live out her remaining days on her own terms. Which makes it all the more heartbreaking when she abandons Coulson (and May) for Radcliffe and his empty promise of a better life within the Framework. Even though her actions are perfectly understandable given that she has a history with the scientist that Coulson’s five-minute pitch talk can’t erase.

We even care about the villains of season 4, Senator Nadeer and Terrence Shockley. Both are loathsome creatures, to be sure, filled with as much hate for themselves as they have for the Inhumans. But has Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. ever had more hissable antagonists, played in such a creepily casual manner? Here, Shockley himself is revealed as an Inhuman, and he’s still obsessed with their destruction. His new powers perfectly suit his personality too, since—as a human bomb—he’s able to go on suicide missions and survive. Which makes him the worst possible nightmare for anyone battling against terrorism. But I’m hoping against hope that Nadeer somehow also experienced Terrigenesis, and emerged with powers that somehow helped her survive the explosion Shockley caused in her office. Parminder Nagra’s just too good in her role to be so quickly disposed of (and I still want my ER reunion with her and Ming-Na Wen).

If there’s one weak link in the chain of newcomers, it’s Anton Ivanov, the Russian devoted to “racial purity.” Zach McGowan is fine in the role, but the character’s menacing introduction several weeks back has given way to a one-note persona that could stand some development. With Mace now in his clutches, perhaps we’ll soon get a war of ideologies between the two men that will enrich his brand of villainy.

As for S.H.I.E.L.D.‘s main man… I wasn’t entirely satisfied with how quickly the feelings we’re told Coulson has long had for May rose to the fore this season. But now that they’re out in the open, they’re doing wonders for him. He’s never been more driven yet at the same time more level-headed. If this is love, I’m all for it. I only hope May is as quick to reciprocate once she escapes Radcliffe. Because we all know tenderness has never come easy for the Cavalry.

Declassified Deliberations

 Just in case anyone had any doubts about Mallory Jansen’s acting range, her turn as Agnes should lay them to rest. And we get to hear her real Australian accent!
“You’ll make the right decision at the right time. Or you’ll get an Asgardian staff through your chest. I’d try to avoid that last part.”
Simmons’ reaction to Fitz almost killing himself while disposing of Shockley reminds we why I love these two so much.
“I think I figured out my place on the team. I’m the blocker.”
It seems clear that although Agnes is gone she may yet save the day — if her downloaded memories convince Aida to turn against Radcliffe. If so, I’d love to see Aida become a member of SHIELD. The possibilities she’d bring for pathos and humor are near endless.

What did you think of this week’s episode? Let me know in the comments below or on Twitter (@JMaCabre).

Images: Marvel/Disney/ABC