Loren A. Olson's Blog, page 2
February 15, 2011
Too old at forty for sex?
I have a new post on Psychology Today:
Too Old for Sex?"Why come out at forty? You're too old for sex."
1. Forty is the infancy of old age
2. Men and women have sex well into late life
3. Being gay is about far more than just having sex.
Some will question my authority about being an expert on coming out in midlife, when I couldn't figure out my own sexuality until I was forty. I suppose that one's life never seems odd to themselves, but I never believed that my situation was all that unique.
In doing my research and writing Finally Out: Letting Go of Living Straightmy hypothesis was that coming out in midlife is more common than thought and the process of coming out in midlife is more complex - but not necessarily more difficult -- than to come out at a younger age. One of the participants in my research survey came out after 53 years of marriage to a woman, and he now is living happily with his gay partner.
To read the rest of the essay:
my link text
Too Old for Sex?"Why come out at forty? You're too old for sex."
"Why come out at forty? You're too old for sex,"so said a young twenty-something. This thinking is wrong on three counts:
1. Forty is the infancy of old age
2. Men and women have sex well into late life
3. Being gay is about far more than just having sex.
Some will question my authority about being an expert on coming out in midlife, when I couldn't figure out my own sexuality until I was forty. I suppose that one's life never seems odd to themselves, but I never believed that my situation was all that unique.
In doing my research and writing Finally Out: Letting Go of Living Straightmy hypothesis was that coming out in midlife is more common than thought and the process of coming out in midlife is more complex - but not necessarily more difficult -- than to come out at a younger age. One of the participants in my research survey came out after 53 years of marriage to a woman, and he now is living happily with his gay partner.
To read the rest of the essay:
my link text
January 24, 2011
Finally Out review
I just learned that the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy will be reviewing "Finally Out."
November 7, 2010
Religion and Homosexuality
Received a disturbing email from a man in East Africa, asking me to treat him for his homosexuality. He wanted some medication to make his attractions go away.
It is troubling because I receive these kinds of inquiries over and over.
The two major barriers to acceptance always seem to be religion and family, and often those two are entwined. Often people feel they must choose betweeen one or the other.
And yet there are many others who cannot choose. It is easy to say, "Everyone should just come out and give their lives authenticity. But it is not always that easy, especially if one has lived a heterosexual life for a good part of their lives.
I'd be interested in hearing from others, to hear how this issues was resolved for you.
It is troubling because I receive these kinds of inquiries over and over.
The two major barriers to acceptance always seem to be religion and family, and often those two are entwined. Often people feel they must choose betweeen one or the other.
And yet there are many others who cannot choose. It is easy to say, "Everyone should just come out and give their lives authenticity. But it is not always that easy, especially if one has lived a heterosexual life for a good part of their lives.
I'd be interested in hearing from others, to hear how this issues was resolved for you.
