Denise K. Rago's Blog, page 24

That Compelling…..Vampire

Whenever I imagine vampires I must admit the first thing I notice about them is their beauty. Vampires stand out, whether in a crowd of hundreds or alone on gas lit street. Something about them makes you look twice. You notice them.

Upon taking a closer look, have you caught the light in their eyes or perhaps the lack of it? Could they be light and friendly or dark and seductive? Either way, you cannot look away, in fact, you might be tempted to come closer until you fall into a pair of eyes that peer into your soul and pulls you closer.

Whether it's French, Spanish or the Queen's English, a vampires' voice will soothe you unlike anything you have ever heard and will envelope you like mist on a warm summer evening. You can't help but come closer….

Fingertips reach out and caress your cheek and you feel yourself falling further as the touch of this immortal creature both assures and arouses you, all at the same time and you hear your name and together you begin to walk; alone.

He begins to tell a tale, of a time and place long before you were ever born and at first it seems unreal, contrived as you try to imagine the filthy streets of eighteenth century Paris, or Renaissance Rome; familiar places that are unrecognizable to your modern sensibilities. There is a sense of timelessness about him, of existing on the fringe of the modern world, living in it but not of it.

You wonder how this could be, yet even if he is attired in modern clothing, you can't help but imagine him in a duster or a frock coat; antique clothing seen perhaps on display in your local historical society, but not really worn by anyone today. And worn so well if I may add!

He talks faster and suddenly you find yourself wound around a tale of love and betrayal, guilt and greed as he explains his life and you hear such sadness in his voice, such longing or regret and you realize that he has emotions, human emotions that you though would have long been eradicated by his very immortality. He has made mistakes, he tells you; 'mistakes' that have cost him much love and happiness , decisions made that were wrong and you realize that this vampire has regrets, guilt and regrets, but then he remembers something humorous and he begins to laugh and you can't help but laugh with him.

He suddenly catches himself and you are not sure if you should stop laughing as well. The story was amusing and then it hits you; he has a sense of humor, something you would never associate with a vampire. A sign of good mental health according to an article you just read on-line. Yes, being able to laugh at yourself is a true sign of mental health.

You stop to wonder about this mythical creature, the vampire. Here you both are walking, talking, laughing, and you aren't even afraid, and that's the insidious power of the vampire. When all is said and done, he can lead you to your own destruction and you go willingly, laughing and admiring his politesse as you walk towards your own doom.

Guest Post with Horror Writer Rita Vetere

Canadian horror writer Rita Vetere has been kind enough to drop by today. She is the author of several dark novels: Ancient Inheritance, Born of Darkness and Whispering Bones. I have had the pleasure of reading all three and I cannot wait for her latest book, Return of the Fallen, to be released this Fall. Rita has offered to giveaway a print copy of her debut novel, Ancient Inheritance. Please leave your comments and one lucky winner will be chosen to receive a copy of this extraordinary novel. The winner to be chosen Wednesday February 2,2011.

Many thanks to Denise for inviting me to guest blog today and to share a few details about my works.

I'll start by saying I classify myself as a dark fiction/horror writer, even though what I write doesn't always conform to the standard definition of what most people would call horror. The truth is, I'm often unsure as to what I'm really writing in terms of genre. For instance, my upcoming release, Return of the Fallen, combines elements of dark fantasy, urban fantasy, action and a touch of horror. So, I do tend to paint my writing with a broad brush in terms of genre and categorize it under the umbrella of dark fiction, which leaves me free to explore new avenues and ideas.

Setting always plays an important role in my novels. Personally, I love to read books with vivid descriptions of unfamiliar places that make me feel I've been there myself. The first time I realized the importance of setting, I think, was after reading To Kill a Mockingbird many years ago, a story that immersed me so completely in the deep south of the 1930s that I felt I was participating in the events in Maycomb, Alabama right alongside the characters.

In my horror/thriller novel, Whispering Bones, the setting (1576 Venice during the Black Death) turned out to be more than just a description of the time and place. The initial setting is truly the back-bone of the story, the driving force that moves the plot forward. I like to think it also provided the perfect atmosphere for my creepy little tale.

In Born of Darkness, my dark fantasy novel, Lilli's discovery of a silver pendant to which an evil spirit has attached itself felt somehow more believable in the context of the mystical and mysterious setting of Marrakesh, Morocco.

And in Ancient Inheritance, my supernatural thriller, what better place to introduce the demon Sammael than Rome, a place marked with a violent history, a city where dark secrets lurk beneath the veneer of refinement, mirroring Sammael himself.

As mentioned, my latest novel, Return of the Fallen, is slated for release in October 2011 with Lyrical Press. Thought I'd post a bit about the story and an excerpt (unedited), which touches on the backstory of my protagonist, Israfel, the only member of the fallen race in existence. Hope you enjoy it.

Unedited Blurb:

When a fiery Nephilim goes rogue, there's only one thing to do: Take cover.

Israfel, the only member of the fallen race in existence, is on a mission: kill Jared Crow, head of a secret organization known as The Order, and the man who murdered her friends. Highly trained in the martial arts and skilled in weaponry, she will allow nothing to stand in her way, not even her mortal lover, Edmond.

Unable to dissuade Israfel from hunting down Crow, Edmond joins her. He's only along for the ride, but it's a ride he'll wish he'd never taken.

Raziel, the last Watcher on earth, has taken refuge in the desert, far from the mortals he is duty-bound to protect. After thousands of years of lonely servitude, he has tired of his task. But when he detects a threat to the Symphony, the universal flow of all living things, he has no choice but to act. He tracks the dissonance to Israfel and joins in the chase, knowing that, sooner or later, Israfel must die.

Jared Crow has an agenda none of them could have foreseen—and he's got some powerful help in the form of the Dark One.

Nephilim.

Mortal.

Watcher.

It will take all three to reverse what Crow has set in motion.

Unedited Excerpt:

…she was six years old again, a skinny little girl, all arms and legs, playing in the dirt behind the old lean-to shed near the farmhouse. Every now and then a stray chicken wandered by, scratching at the ground in search of something to eat. The farm where she and mamma lived was isolated, miles away from the nearest town. Such a funny name for a town, she always thought – Oskaloosa.

Lunchtime had come and gone and it was nearly time for supper, but Israfel had not yet had breakfast. Nor had she asked mamma for any today—not after she'd woken up this morning to find mamma sitting on the porch, bible in hand, her pretty dark hair all askew and looking at Israfel out of the corner of her eye.

Israfel knew what that look meant. She'd do well to steer clear of mamma today. Whenever mamma started out looking at her all sideways like that, before the day was over, Israfel usually ended up on the wrong end of the leather strap that hung on a nail just inside the cellar door. Being hungry was nothing compared to what might happen if the wrong thing came out of Israfel's mouth when mamma was having one of her spells.

Israfel did what she usually did when mamma went strange. She tried her best not to exist. Sometimes it worked. Sometimes she'd get off without a strapping; other times, she'd go to bed not only hungry, but covered in welts from the leather strap as well.

As she played in the dirt with her little shovel, Israfel wished fervently that it was Sunday instead of Saturday. On Sunday mornings, mamma left her alone, departing early to walk the seven miles to town to attend church. Usually, she didn't return home until late afternoon, and Israfel could breathe easy for a few hours. Mamma never took Israfel to church with her. She told Israfel once that she'd probably be struck by lightning and burned to a crisp if she ever tried to enter a church, on account of she was a "'bomination". Whatever that was.

"Israfel!"

At the sound of mamma's voice, Israfel's head snapped up, her pulse pounding at her slim neck.

"You'd best mind me, girl." Mamma lowered her voice. "Come out from wherever you're hiding, you little heathen."

Real fear sloshed over Israfel at the words. Things always got really bad when mamma started calling her a "little heathen". It meant she'd been reading the bible again. Something in it always seemed to make mamma mad at her.

"Don't make me look for you," she heard mamma say in a voice that meant business.

Israfel peeked around the corner of the shed and spotted mamma standing close by on the other side, her face turned up to the summer sky. Her intense fear did not prevent Israfel from thinking how pretty mamma looked in that moment with the brilliant sun shining down on her. Mamma was beautiful. On the outside, anyway. Then her mother lowered her head and, turning, spotted her.

Suddenly, mamma didn't look so pretty anymore. Her eyes narrowed to slits and Israfel could feel the bad intent in them from where she stood. Mamma muttered something else then, but all Israfel caught was "… should'a killed you long ago."

With a start, Israfel saw it was not the leather strap mamma clutched in her hand, but something much worse. At the sight of the large butcher knife her mother carried, Israfel took off like a pistol shot, her tiny heart pounding like hooves. She did not run back to the farmhouse, heading instead for the gravel road which she knew led to town, hoping to outrun her mother and find help. Israfel's considerable instinct for survival told her if mamma got hold of her today, she would not live to see the sun come up.

Almost two miles down the road, straining for breath, Israfel glanced over her shoulder again. She kept telling herself not to look back, but couldn't seem to stop herself. Mamma was much closer than the last time she'd checked, running in bare feet, her thin cotton dress flying out behind her, still brandishing the knife and yelling at Israfel at the top of her lungs. Israfel didn't understand most of the stuff mamma shouted, but she understood one thing perfectly. If mamma caught her, she was going to use that butcher knife on her, probably much the same way she used it on the chickens on those rare occasions she got it in her head to cook a proper meal.

Panting with exertion, Israfel conserved her breath for running and didn't scream. Not, that was, until she felt mamma's hand grasp the back of her dress, tripping her up and causing her to fall flat on her face in the gravel. Then she screamed loud enough to wake the dead and didn't stop. Mamma flipped her over in the middle of the road and straddled her, pinning her to the ground. Israfel screamed and screamed, even though she knew there was no one around to hear or come to her aid.

Mamma raised the knife high. "Shut up, you little mongrel. You think I like doing this? Not me wants you dead… It's him." The hand not holding the knife pointed to the sky.

The crazed look in mamma's eyes only caused Israfel's terror to increase. She yelled at the top of her voice, her heart bursting with fear as the knife hovered dangerously over her.

Suddenly, a spray of gravel struck the back of Israfel's head and she heard the loud blaring of a car horn over her screams. Mamma looked up, momentarily distracted from her task, and Israfel snatched her opportunity, squirming out from under mamma, wriggling like a worm. As she crawled away on hands and knees, she ran smack into the chrome grill of a car, which had stopped just behind them on the road.

The man who jumped out of the car moved toward mamma, and Israfel saw thunderclouds in his grey eyes. Mamma got to her feet and faced him, glaring at him with angry eyes.

The man did not raise his voice, but his words carried undeniable authority. "Put the knife down."

Visit my website: http://www.ritavetere.com

Email me: ritavetere.author@gmail.com

The Pointe Shoe and the Pen

I recently saw the movie Black Swan with a good friend. We both share a history of being life-long students of ballet and lovers of all forms of dance and despite being "all grown up" we continue to love ballet. As we began to critique the movie, the parallels between two of my favorite creative pastimes ~ ballet dancing and writing, became more than obvious. On the surface, ballet dancing and writing may seem like light years apart, having only the common thread of being "creative pursuits," but digging a bit deeper I found numerous qualities that make both a ballet performance look just as effortless as holding a copy of your own finished novel.

 Though dancing is a singular pursuit, dancers rely on musicians, choreographers, instructors and other dancers. The telling of the story requires all the parts to work as a whole to bring the ballet to life. Similarly, writers need editors, publishers, reviewers, artists, web designers and agents; all these people help us bring our creative piece to life and get it out into the world. And we can never forget the audience. The people we write and dance for. Those precious people just beyond the lights who support us, cheer us on and continue to inspire us.

 As a dancer, I can't express what it's like to work within a group towards a common goal. We rehearsed long hours on a piece that might only last two minutes. Months of work for two minutes on the stage! It reminds me of my writing process. I may spend three hours writing a scene. When I go back to it, I may decide it is perhaps something worth saving but not anything I want to use in my current novel. Sometimes I may take a sentence or two from all that writing, and then again, I may decide it's not worth keeping at all. Much time is spent banging away on quantity, hoping to cull quality, but it doesn't always work out that way.

 As a self-published author, I am constantly striving for balance in my life, because I am the one responsible for writing blog posts, keeping up on Twitter, Facebook, my website all while finding book reviewers, readers, you name it. In the world of ballet there is a continual balancing act and I am not just referring to being on Pointe. Balance requires an even flow of energy into and out of us. Writing, like dance, requires us to recognize and harness this flow which allows us to manage all the pieces of our lives, for most of us have other jobs, spouses, children and friends. Every part of our lives is important and requires energy. We need to think ahead, plan, schedule; just like we might plan a party or our weekly dinner menu. Each step leads to the next which creates the whole. Thinking ahead may be difficult but it's necessary to your success, whether in the studio or in your writing career.

 Ballet rehearsals require hours of repetitive exercises that have more to do with improving ones technique which lends itself to becoming a better dancer. The ballet barre is repetitive and through this continuous structure the dancer builds stamina and discipline. To do something over and over again can be frustrating, yet a dancer, like a writer can only hone their craft through repetition, discipline and focus. Writers must write. It's that simple. The creative process that comes forth can only thrive on the foundation of focus, discipline and repetition. As writers, we must always push and plan ahead, whether it's a blog post, an article, short story or a manuscript. Dare I say the creative process is hard work?

 Finally I mention the creative process! In dance you rehearse a piece that is not yours ~ it is given to you to learn and perfect and only then can you as a dancer make it your own. Suddenly, an age-old story takes on new meaning and in retelling the story it becomes new again, possibly open to an interpretation you never imagined. Writing and reading are like that and always makes me marvel. How many books can be written? I never tire in my search for words woven together in such a way to make me laugh or cry or to be inspired to create something greater than myself and to marvel when others do so.

And that is the beauty of the creative arts. They are ageless and timeless and hopefully we are forever inspired by them to work harder, to keep writing or dancing and never lose sight of our dreams.

Considering Self-Publishing? Some Must Have Books

Months ago, I connected with  a woman at my local YMCA. We began talking and one thing led to another and when I mentioned I had just published my first novel she was very interested as she is looking to publish a novel of her own. Of course I mentioned CreateSpace, the self-publishing company I used to publish Immortal Obsession.  They are competent, accessible and extremely pleasant to work with.  www.createspace.com/

Shortly after our initial conversation I brought her two books which I found invaluable through the entire self-publishing process. The Fine Print of Self-Publishing by Mark Levine: http://www.book-publishers-compared.com/  and Self-Publishing 101 by Debbie Elicksen, published through Self-Counsel Press: www.self-counsel.com.  Each book gives your more than enough information on self-publishing companies, book design, costs as well as crafting a business plan that is realistic and works for you. 

Recently we met up again and I was happy to learn that she has almost finished her novel and is looking to have it published soon. I handed her another book I had recently purchased, telling her to make the investment. The Complete Guide to Self-Publishing by Marilyn Ross and Sue Collier.  I even gave her my coveted 15% off coupon from Barnes and Noble, that's how much I want her to buy this book! www.SelfPublishingResources.com/

I wish I had purchased this book months ago as it is loaded with so much information about all aspects of self-publishing, yet I still find it helpful as I look to market my novel as well as to connect with other authors, bloggers, etc.  There are 23 chapters which discuss everything from the various types of self-publishing, web design, book manufacturing, social media, book signings,etc.  It's great.

My accquaintance promises to have her book done by month's end and though I have told her, it;s just the first step in a long process I don't know if she heard me…..but that's another post.

As we begin our day

As we begin our day, we have no idea what may befall us. Given the current news, I have been reflecting deeply on syncronicity, fate, whatever you want to call it. Sometimes when I read a news story I find myself wondering….when this person woke up this morning did they ever think? Fill in the blanks for yourself, it could be really positive. Today is the 11th year and the 11th day. I find the number 11 to be very poignant for me. As I meditated I also prayed that I may make the world a better place and that I may raise my own vibration to assist in this process.

We are all in this together. Who are the we – all of us on this earth. What is the this you ask? It is life, sharing our planet, interacting, living in our world, wherever we may find ourselves. Together –  that's right. All of us share our life experiences together on this planet. Not in a bubble or a vaccum, but together. Working together, putting aside our differences, or talking them out to reach a common good that benefits all of us…it's something I work towards each morning as I begin my day.

On Being Human

Creating flawed, human characters is not always easy, but creating flawed, human vampires is even harder. I love both my vampires: Christian Du Maure and Michel Baptiste, two friends from childhood who became vampires at the ripe old age of twenty in the year of our Lord, 1757. They have spent the last 250 years moving from city to city, Europe to America, now settled in Manhattan. I say now. They have lived in Manhattan since 1901, both beautiful in their own way, both opposites and yet, very human.

As they have grown older, rather than losing their humanity, it has only become more pronounced. Christian has become more pensive, serious and responsible to the mortals he has sworn to protect, while Michel…. Michel has become more promiscuous, carefree and irresponsible, diving into the mortal world as a way to cope with his immortality as Christian has become more isolated and alone.

Both vampires have struggled to become much more than a parasite with a pretty face who has the power of life and death over the merel mortals around them. They have each paid a price for their struggles and the morality of their choices, especially when it comes to a woman they both left behind in Revolution-era Paris; one Josette Delacore, a mortal aristocrat with an allure even they could not resist.

Their existence is rocked when they learn that old enemies are afoot and the past is never really too far behind.

Happy New Year!!!!!

It's that time again when I make my resolutions for the up and coming year. I began to think about it earlier this month and I even looked back to see what I had posted in the past.  Here's the usual:

1) Exercise more

2) Eat healthier

3) Get more sleep

These types of resolutions just scream to be broken. I'll take them one at a time.

1. Get more exercise – I mean, just because I go to the gym almost daily, doesn't mean I enjoy it. I have a confession to make: I really dislike it. I drag myself there and only afterwards do I feel great. If I didn't have my ipod I would kill myself.  My true passion has always been ballet and the dance studio is the one place I feel both truly challenged and yet comfortable.  It's hard work.  Anyone who has ever studied ballet will attest to this simple truth.

2.Eat healthier. I love food way too much and besides, since I exercise so much my body cries out for fuel. Generally, since I spend so much time at my computer, I try to eat less for lunch, but it's tough.  Ironically, the meal I skip most frequently is breakfast, which, they say, is the most important meal of the day.  I need to be up and moving for a bit before I take in anything more than a cup of coffee. 

And #3 – Get more sleep. How much sleep I get on any given night depends on so much other stuff. Some nights I can barely keep my eyes open. I hit the pillow and fall into a coma. Other nights I toss and turn in a fitful sort of sleep. So much depends on my external world, what movies on or book I am reading, time of year…. It's complicated. 

So, negating the usual resolutions, I took a different approach, thinking harder about what I might do differently in the New Year.

Here's what I came up with:

Be kinder, more humble, less judgemental, more helpful, funnier, more polite, neater, more confrontational, less confrontational, say less, say more, smile a lot, listen more, talk less, give more, take less…..

Again, it's alot to accomplish, so I tried to narrow it down to one basic truth… and this is my truth only and not my orginal thought, however, here it is:

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.  

It's that simple, yet that tough. It cuts across the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.  It only requires introspection, a little less ego and the ability to put yourself inside another person. So as another year passes and a new one arrives, I will try to live a life less about ego and more about service.

May your New Year be filled with happiness, joy, peace, love, oh and don't forget the cookies!

Interview with a Vampire…. Author

My writing desk.

Interview with a vampire….. author

A friend sent me an e-mail after finishing Immortal Obsession in which she posed some interesting questions. I promised to answer them in a blog post.  Here you go Mary.

† I guess you did a lot of research for your book, especially about the French Revolution?  

Some of the books I read include: The Road from Versailles by Munro Price, Travels in France During 1787, 1788, 1789 by Arthur Young, Paris: The Secret History by Andrew Hussy and Vive La Revolution: A Stand-Up History of the French Revolution by Mark Steel. 

†Are you a fan of history?

Most definitely. Especially, English and French history. To say I have an affinity for the French Revolution is an understatement.  I have always loved Arthurian legend as well. 

†Have you ever been to France?

Yes, as an undergraduate student I spent one semester studying at the American University of Paris.  It was a life changing experience.  I find Paris one of the most romantic cities in Europe with incredible churches, parks and of course The Louvre.  I promised myself I would go back again, but so far it hasn't happened yet. Who knows, maybe to do research for my second book.

†How did you choose the names of your characters? 

Quite honestly, most of the names just came to me.  Gaétan was shortened from Gaetano, my father's real first name.  He then Americanized it to Thomas.  I wanted to immortalize him on paper somehow so I used a derivative of his first name.  Étienne is French for Steven, which is the name of one of my siblings who I wanted to fit into this story somehow.    

 I have always found a certain mysterious allure from the name Christian.  I have never known anyone with this first name, but his full name just came to me, just as Michel's did.  They were just in my head.   Josette is also a name I find seductive and haunting.  Amanda is in honor of someone who is such a lovely person I had to use her name!   

In my original draft, Amanda's best friend was named Jasmine and she was the exact opposite of Amanda, sort of like Christian and Michel.  Jasmine was the name of someone I knew and I used bits of her character in the novel, but then I basically rewrote Immortal Obsession, and Jasmine became Bethany Daniels, an accountant who is a bit more subdued.

 [Christian, for example, is a common name in Germany]

 †Who did you have in mind when you created Christian, Michel or Amanda? 

I won't deny Amanda has parts of me in her; a love of art, museums and history.  Her sense of loneliness and always feeling like an outsider mirrored my childhood experience as well.  As for Christian and Michel, I am not really sure but they speak to me and I feel their presence so much it's as though I am documenting their experiences, dreams and feelings.  

[Christian is my favorite]

Christian seems to be everyone's favorite.  I would be curious to know why. I know that Amanda feels safe with him and she trusts him, despite his capability for anger and destruction.  He is a powerful presence and yet there is a calmness about him which she finds appealing. 

†Where do you write? Do you have a favorite place?

My favorite place is my desk in my bedroom surrounded by candles, crystals and photos of family.  When on the beach I use a yellow, legal pad.  I love reading and writing on the beach, though I can't write as fast in longhand.

†Do you need silence for the writing process or do you listen to music while writing?

While writing Immortal Obsession I did most of my writing under headphones!  For my second book, silence seems most appealing to me.  I tend to go with my feelings on any particular day. 

†If yes, what was your personal writing soundtrack?

Some songs that spoke to me include: You're Beautiful ~ James Blunt, Collide ~ Howie Day, You and Me ~ Life House, Come Back ~ Pearl Jam, Iris ~ Goo Goo Dolls.  Generally love songs and somber ballads.  Other musical groups such as Cold Play, Alice in Chains, Nirvana and the Red Hot Chili Peppers influenced this novel, as well as Chopin and Beethoven.

 †Tell us a bit about Christian from your point of view. 

Christian is a paradox.  On one hand he is powerful, solitary and passionate about his world.  On the other hand, he is full of anger, doubt and regret over his lost love, Josette Delacore.  He does not see himself as handsome, not like Michel and he wonders about his attractiveness to women.  He is a loner by nature, yet he is someone who feels deeply and remains incredibly loyal to those he loves.  He tries to keep his emotions under control, yet falls hopelessly in love with Josette Delacore, risking his life  and Michel's as well.  More of this time period emerges through flashbacks in book two, which I hope to finish in 2011.

†The relationship between Christian and Michel, for example, is really interesting.

I agree. One of my readers suggested that Michel needs his own book, and that may come at some point.  Christian and Michel have been friends since childhood in Meudon, France.  I think it would be safe to say that opposites attract. Despite being the same sex, both men share an affinity and loyalty to one another  that is enviable and sustains them through time. 

One of the scenes I had written for Immortal Obsession but later removed gives the reader a taste of the complexity of their relationship.  Christian had gone sort of mad after the death of Josette Delacore.  As a thirty year old vampire, he is considered "young" and he loses all control, killing indiscriminately.  His behavior even frightens Michel who sees no way to help his best friend, until one dawn he is able to chain Christian in his coffin before they experience their daily "death." Michel's immediate concern is to keep Christian safe and this is the only way he knows how to contain him, despite not knowing if Christian will survive the ordeal.

 I won't give any more away except to say that obviously Christian survives and his confinement restores his sanity.   When he meets up with other vampires from his past, he is almost unrecognizable because of his waist-length hair, which is the result of his imprisonment.  I won't dare reveal how many years in lingered in a state of darkness, locked away in his coffin.

Merry Christmas To All

One of my personal Christmas traditions is to keep all the cards we receive each year in a box rubber-banded with the year noted. Once I decorate my Christmas tree I sit in front of the fire and proceed to read all the Christmas and Hanukkah cards from the past year. Sometimes one really moves me and I may punch a hole it it, add ribbon and it becomes an ornament on my Christmas tree. I have years of cards in my box and sometimes I really take a trip down memory lane and reread all the past years.

Of course in this box are cards from loved ones who are no longer with us. We have a Hanukkah card on our tree from a dear friend and co-worker who died days after giving my husband this card. It's one of the ways we remember him. I also get teary when I see my mom's handwriting on our 2008 Christmas Card. How was I to know this would be the last one I would ever receive from her? I have saved cards from friends who have moved far away, a dear uncle who is no longer alive, a father-in-law I miss so much.

Christmas time is a time for me to reflect on the past year, all my joys and sorrows, successes and failures. I think ahead about what I might do differently "next time" or what kind words I failed to say when I had the chance. I also remember all my past Christmas's and luckily, I have a tiny framed black and white photo on my Christmas tree of me at about 8 years old, smiling up at our Christmas tree. It 's such a happy memory I had to capture it.

I received a card this week from an old friend who actually wrote the card herself and painted the cover portrait ~ it's a watercolor of a beautiful bird perched on a branch. The message of her card, like her card itself is priceless, made with love from the heart with a simple message of love in ones' heart, of sharing good times with family and friends. Of sleigh bells, church bells and my very own favorite, the laughter of children.

I think of falling snow, lit candles, a choir singing, houses decorated, people taking a moment longer to chat and to help one another. It's giving of oneself, sacrifice and grace and remembering why we celebrate this most joyous time of the year. All these moments create our personal memories; filled with family, friends and joys that have no price tag on them.

Merry Christmas everyone.