Michael Kindt's Blog, page 74
January 29, 2016
“next to of course god america ilove you land of the...
“next to of course god america i
love you land of the pilgrims’ and so forth oh
say can you see by the dawn’s early my
country ‘tis of centuries come and go
and are no more what of it we should worry
in every language even deafanddumb
thy sons acclaim your glorious name by gorry
by jingo by gee by gosh by gum
why talk of beauty what could be more beaut-
iful than these heroic happy dead
who rushed like lions to the roaring slaughter
they did not stop to think they died instead
then shall the voice of liberty be mute?”
He spoke. And drank rapidly a glass of water
–e.e. cummings
Don’t tell me AC/DC ain’t punk. They’re blues punk, even.Have a...
Don’t tell me AC/DC ain’t punk. They’re blues punk, even.
Have a good Friday night. Me, I’m gonna swallow all these psychiatric drugs and get way, way mentally healthy. Fuckin’ A.
early-onset-of-night:
South Dakota halts ‘Don’t Jerk and Drive’...
South Dakota halts ‘Don’t Jerk and Drive’ campaign because, you know, it was incredibly stupid.
Here in my state, the Department of Public Safety, bored out of their minds, created an ad campaign telling young male drivers to not jerk their steering wheels while driving in icy conditions. This is because there is a veritable epidemic of young men jerking their steering wheels while driving in icy conditions in this state.
Ok, that’s not true. Actually, the Department of Public Safety simply needed to justify its existence, so they came up with this ad campaign to make it look like they’re important and are really doing something, which they aren’t. You see, a bloated, mostly pointless bureaucracy is needed so that our elected officials can pretend there are budget deficits. It gives them something to talk about and also assists them in creating new taxes and raising others. I, too, like to spend all my money on shit I don’t need and then throw up my hands and pretend I’m poor. I, after all, am a good American.
The campaign, aside from being unneeded and pointless, also turned out to be offensive to a lot of people, because the Public Safety boneheads thought it would be cute to incorporate all kinds of masturbation innuendo. The ads implied that jerking the steering wheel while driving in icy road conditions was just as dangerous as releasing the kraken and rubbing one out while headed down the road.
People of delicate sensibility, also bored out of their minds, started complaining and the ad campaign was pulled.
How or why they came up with this connection between driving and masturbation is beyond me, but the very fact they did proves they have way too much time on their hands, not to mention, probably, jizz.
Article I wrote. A “blast” from the past, if you will..
"When someone describes themselves as a taxpayer, they’re about to be an asshole."
- Demitri Martin
January 28, 2016
I think it's a brilliant move by Trump, blowing off the Fox News debate.
Fox News is joke channel run by partisan hacks. What does Trump have to do with them? He may as well run for Congress and become yet another Obama bedwarmer.
Bullshit.
One poll shows that 83% of the people who would have tuned in for the debate will not, now that there’s no Trump.
Stick it to ‘em where it hurts, Donald: RATINGS.
Trump is America’s middle finger and right now he’s all the way up the establishment’s ass.
God, I love it.
January 27, 2016
I wish you all peace. For now.
I wish you all peace. For now.
I'm outsider, outside of everything.
Well, yesterday it rose above 25 degrees finally so we all got to go outside and stand in a parking lot. Apparently at 25 degrees or below crazy people will die.
I stood there, my hands in my pockets, looking at the grill of a Toyota while the others desperately sucked on cigarettes like porn stars suck on dick.
It’s weird being told what you can and can’t do, when and when you can’t do it, especially since I am now here voluntarily. I mean, instead of staring at the grill of a Toyota, I could’ve just walked away. My house is like 5 miles from here.
It’s like a job in a lot of ways. You can leave at anytime, but something compels you to stay, something more than just the money. I have never really not had a job. I’m in my 40s and apart from a week here, maybe two weeks there, I have always been employed. Hell, even when I was homeless I had something cooking. A man needs booze, after all, especially a homeless one. People have said to me “I can’t find a job”, which is bullshit, complete and utter. Either your standards are too high or you ain’t really looking. Granted, it may be quite a step down from, say, airline pilot to dishwasher, but it’s one you have to take if you don’t wanna be a fucking bum.
Men work. Quit whining and get off your ass. Channel your inner immigrant.
Standing there, I thought about all the weirdness I have been through over the years….homelessness, jail, blood, guts, bats, booze, the nightmare of always having a shit job because I’m not an airline pilot, trying to play the goddamn banjo and failing miserably, pot farming, pretending to be a psychic for fifty grand a year….and I realized I was glad that now here was this new weirdness. Finally. Maybe this is what I really need: new weirdness.
No wonder I am in a mental hospital. I mean, come on. It’s so obvious.
@pnutbuttertits tagged meNAME: MikeWHERE I’M FROM: South Dakota, born and raised, with...
@pnutbuttertits tagged me
NAME: Mike
WHERE I’M FROM: South Dakota, born and raised, with intermissions in Idaho, Wyoming, Colorado, Minnesota, and Arizona. Yes, I have a Western drawl.
WHAT I DO: Not a whole lot really. Invest in distressed oil stocks. Write books and articles. Fruits and vegetables. Periodic nervous breakdowns.
I tag @nicknameless @drunksincerity @sugarforsalt @davesnothere
(the first four people who liked my last post :)
FIRE NUNS rocking the Star Theater in Portland. My son is the...
FIRE NUNS rocking the Star Theater in Portland. My son is the guy in a dress.
