Scott Nagele's Blog, page 35
May 30, 2013
You can lead a kid to water, but it might cost you
Sometimes the idea of a thrill ride is very inviting, especially when that thrill ride is somewhere else. As you get closer to the ride, and begin to appreciate how tall it is or how fast it goes, the thrill can slip into fear. I’ve had this experience, and now my son has, too. We […]
May 28, 2013
It’s a long story
Lately, whenever I ask my son a question like, “How did the [busted item of the day] get broken?” he heaves a big sigh and replies, “It’s a long story.” He does not attempt to relate that long story, because it is clear that a father with such a short attention span would not be […]
May 22, 2013
Your jokes are stale and your nipples are useless
The baby has discovered separation anxiety – not at being separated from me – people all over the world rejoice daily that they are separated from me. The baby has developed a deep dislike for being separated from his mother. This includes separations of as little as a few feet. Separation anxiety takes its toll […]
May 15, 2013
Dandelion whine
I have a new toy for pulling weeds. Our lawn has lots of weeds. More accurately, our weeds have a little lawn in between them. During the summer, I can hide most of our weeds by mowing them to the same level as the grass. From the far side of the street, the green and […]
May 9, 2013
Going commando is what you make of it
Several weeks ago, my son took a bath. Yes, he has taken one or two baths since then, but the several weeks ago bath is the seed of the story I’m about to tell. After this particular bath, he went into this room to get dressed only to discover that all of his underwear were […]
May 7, 2013
This tail was made for pulling
Our baby and our cat are best friends. This is an unexpected development. When the big boy was a baby, he and the cat had an awkward relationship. The thing they had most in common was a wariness of the other. They might have been reality TV show contestants. Since the big boy was the [...]
May 2, 2013
The perfect knock-knock joke
There’s something about a knock-knock joke. Four-year-olds can’t get enough of them. This is God’s wrath on parents. I don’t know what crime parents have committed to merit such a harsh punishment, but it must have been something really bad. Tell a knock-knock joke to a four-year-old (which is something a sane person should never [...]
April 30, 2013
50 shapes of chicken
We were on our way to KFC for dinner, because I’m classy that way and it’s only the best for my family. I don’t know why I periodically crave KFC. I would guess that the 11th herb or spice must be crack cocaine, except that I don’t think they make a version of crack that [...]
April 25, 2013
Pride and baby gates goeth before a fall
My wife and I know it’s in everyone’s best interests for the baby to learn to walk. We know this, but we ignore it. We ignore this tried and true fact of life for a single reason. That reason can be explained in two words: baby gates. Nobody likes baby gates. They are a pain [...]
April 23, 2013
Why are cows so smart?
I’ve seen online debates between people who hold that childlessness is the supreme lifestyle choice and those who espouse the blessings of children. I’ve never joined these debates. I won’t try to convince people who really don’t want children to have children. Also, the reasons they list against having children: the expense, the disappearance of [...]
