Megan Bostic's Blog, page 39

Monkey Madness Monday: Love: Choice vs. Feeling

So, I had a debate the other day about Love. The argument, could you choose to love someone, or was it an inherent feeling? I'm talking about romantic love here, not the love you feel for your child or friends.

In my opinion, you cannot choose who you love. It's a feeling that comes from deep within. It's like a flower, it starts out as a tiny bud, then grows and blossoms into something big and beautiful. My opposition said you can choose who you love. I don't think you can open yourself up like that. You either love someone or you don't, you can't force yourself.

I asked two other people. One said definitely a feeling. The other said it's a choice of trust. You have to choose to trust that person and only then can you open your heart to them.

Oddly enough, the two who said love is a choice are men, the one who said feeling is a woman.

What do you think?

F³A: Inked

So, I've always wanted a tattoo.  I just turned 43 and finally got one. I'd call this some kind of mid-life crisis thing, but I went through that about five years ago. And like I said, I always wanted one. Those of you who know me, or have been reading me can probably guess what I got. It could only be one of a couple things right? Soccer ball? Monkey? Or...
[image error] 
I decided a while back to get a sun on my forearm so I could always see the sun even on the grayest of days here in the northwest. I was going to go with one of those more mystical suns with the face, but the bf said they reminded him of the sun on the Teletubbies and ruined them for me. So I went tribal, which is more "me" anyway I suppose. I'm more primal than cabalistic.
Did it hurt? Yeah, like an MF, but only at first. I didn't scream like a little bitch like the bf wanted (only because I made fun of him when he was getting his tat), there were no tears shed. Maybe a couple of pained grimaces. After awhile though, when you know what pain to expect you kind become numb to it. At least I did. And of course, the less meaty part of the forearm hurt like a bitch compared to the rest.
So there it is, my first tattoo. I will undoubtedly get more. I mean, I'm not going to be getting a sleeve or anything, but I have ideas for at least two more, and yes, a monkey is going to be involved. 
Happy Friday, here are the Scribbles:
Random Pandora Song: You Only Live Once, The Strokes
 
Book of the Week: Still reading Velveteen by Danny Marks and loving it. Favorite line so far, and Danny has it on his bookmarks, "She walks a tightrope between psycho and smokin'" How brilliant is that?
Netflix/Redbox of the Week: Hard to decide. I fell asleep during a couple movies this week. I'm going with The Mechanic. Jason Statham, Ben Foster, I mean, Statham shirtless, violence, explosions, what more can you ask for from an action movie?
Quote of the Week: "Show me a man with a tattoo and I'll show you a man with an interesting past."  ~Jack London

Life in the Fast Lane

So lately I've been driving a lot, to school visits, to conference, to book release parties, and I have to admit, I'm a bit of a lead foot. Also, being Scot, Italian, and Aries, I'm a tiny bit impatient *oozing sarcasm*

I mostly stay in the very left lane. Slower drivers stay right, right? Stay right unless to pass, right? I seem to always be passing. I can't help it. It's just the way I drive. So I stay left.

Now, if I'm in that left lane and someone comes up behind me who is obviously traveling at a faster speed than I, I pull into the lane to my right and let them pass.  This is freeway etiquette, yes? That's the way I've always known it to be.

So why are the slower drivers so stubborn these days? It's like they make it a point now to get in the very left lane, drive slow, and stay put. I don't know how many drivers I came up behind who just stayed there. When I can, I'll just pass them on the right, even though I shouldn't have to and you're not supposed to, but what else am I supposed to do?

But if I can't? I mean, is it some evil plan to irritate all the left lane drivers of the world? And how about when it's a one lane highway, and clearly, the person in the front of the pack is holding EVERYONE else up. SLOW VEHICLE TURNOUT! What is so difficult about pulling into one of those very large parking strips and waiting until those of us who like to drive at least the speed limit go by? That is what the vehicle turnouts are for. And the signs used to say delay of 5 vehicles unlawful. Some of these assclowns have had 10 to 20! Not sure if they still use those signs, but they SHOULD! They're usually even warned at least a quarter mile ahead when the turnout is coming, so it's not like they don't see it until the last minute!

Do I drive too fast? Probably. But it's freeway politeness to get out of that very left lane if someone comes up behind you driving faster. It's like an unspoken rule. Be polite. You will be saving the person much frustration, road rage, and numerous obscenities.

I'm not venting

Stole this photo from DannyI know, yesterday I promised a rant, but I forgot that I was going to Jennifer Shaw Wolf's book release party. That's right. Her YA novel, Breaking Beautiful was released yesterday and her party was held at Fireside Books in Olympia Washington. My fellow Harbingers of Doom were mostly in attendance, J Anderson Coats, Danny Marks, Marissa Meyer, we were only missing Marissa Burt. Also, in attendance was 2k11er, Kiki Hamilton. We try and support each others endeavors whenever possible.
[image error] I stole this photo from Jen
Jennifer's party was wonderful. There was food, a beautiful cake with her book cover on it. She also had a speak come from SafePlace Olympia to speak. SafePlace is a confidential shelter for survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault. Jennifer had people bring donations for the shelter and also had a raffle to support the wonderful cause. Jennifer chose SafePlace because her novel deals with domestic abuse.

[image error] Jen signing books, I stole this pic from her too.Jen looked gorgeous and happy and her husband was running around taking pictures and beaming with absolute pride. Aside from the Harbingers and Kiki, the room was filled with family and friends, other writers and readers. Jen said it was the best day ever. You should go out and buy her book. Now. Go. SHOO!!  Buy Kiki's, Marissa's (both), J's, and mine while you're at it. You'll have to wait for Danny's, doesn't come out until October, but I'll tell you what, I'm reading it right now (I have an ARC) and it is delicious!

SCBWI Conference Recap

I can't tell you every little thing that happened because the author's presentations are their property and I don't want to give everything away, so I'll just say a little about each one.

Friday:

Dialogue intensive with author Matt de la Pena. He basically talked about the writer getting out of the way and letting the characters take over the story. This makes a lot of sense and I believe it would immerse the reader deeper into the story.

Saturday:

Session with literary agent Tricia Lawrence from Erin Murphy Literary Agency. She talked about the revision process. Basically she said you should look to yourself when revising and dig deep.

Session with author Helen Landalf. She talked about keeping it real in fiction, meaning having your novel be authentic rather than accurate.

Session with author Bruce Hale about Skype visits with schools. Mostly talked about making sure your equipment works and to be entertaining. Also to make sure you are prepared and to make sure the teacher or librarian on the other side is prepared as well.

Session with author Rachel Vail on Character Building. She talked about the need to know your characters in depth before trying to write them.

Session with Caroline Sun publicist for Harper. She talked about publicity vs marketing, and what your publicist can do for you. She also talked about how to communicate with your publicist and what you can do on your own do publicize your book.

The keynotes were really good too. Bruce Hale talked about having to be a warrior writer. Matt de la Pena talked about being a working class writer. Melissa Sweet talked about digging in deep with research. Bonny Becker talking about being yourself when writing, and Rachel Vail spoke about writing with humor and heart to build characters.

Those are the basics without giving too much away. Some things to think about...



Tomorrow I rant about stress, as usual. :)

Monkey Madness Monday: Back From Conference

So, I'm back from conference and it once again, was amazing. Keynote speakers were Bruce Hale, Matt de la Pena, Melissa Sweet, Bonny Becker, and Rachel Vail.

I did a dialogue intensive with Matt de la Pena on Friday afternoon. This was the session for which I had to read Okay for Now and Inside Out and Back Again.

totally stole this from Danny MarksFriday night was my friend J Anderson Coats release party for her novel, The Wicked and the Just, so right after the intensive, my boyfriend, Mike picked me up and whisked me away to Everett to SoJen Cellars to help J celebrate. Awesome food, and were joined by J's family and fellow writers, Marissa Burt, Marissa Meyer, Danny Marks, and Jennifer Shaw Wolf.

So Saturday rolls around, I'm in the elevator heading downstairs and this guy gets into the elevator with me. He's asking me how I'm enjoying conference, we're chit chatting. The elevator door opens and I say, well, I'm sure I"ll see you around, looks like you're presenting? He says, yeah, I'm this morning's keynote. *palm to face* Yes, I was in the elevator, talking with Bruce Hale, and I made a complete idiot of myself. Yep.

It reminds me of how much of a newbie I still really am in all this and the reason I joined SCBWI in the first place: to meet and network with other writers. I knew NO other writers when I dove into this crazy world. And yes, I've met TONS since, but I still know very few locally, and that is my goal: to meet more in the area. Unfortunately, in my tangible world, I'm incredibly shy, and all the writers here seem to all be in their own secret societies and I don't know the secret handshakes. Even some of the ones I met last year I tried to approach this weekend seemed to have closed their metaphorical doors on me. Sigh. How can this person that is so outgoing on video and online and in her school visits be such a timid mouse when faced with a social situation full of people going through the same kinds of experiences as her? 

The answer: I have no idea.

The solution: Get more involved. That's what I've decided to do. I have no idea HOW I'm going to achieve that. I feel like I'm already a chicken, sans head. First I will make lists. Second I will cross things off list, more than likely, housework will be the first to go. Then I will prioritize all of my "things" I do and see where I can squeeze in any other "things".

Sounds impossible? Improbable?

I don't care. I'm going to do it.

I may need talking off the ledge from time to time.

I may disappear for weeks on end.

I may need to refill my Xanax prescription more often than usual, but seriously, I'm going to do this thing.

So, I was going to talk more about conference, but I think I'll finish that up tomorrow.

F³A: Queen of Filth

Yes, that is apparently me, according to Rated Reads, my little book, Never Eighteen, is the dirtiest YA book they have ever read, being the only YA book they up to this point they have labeled as DIRTY.  Yep.  I will quote my reviewer, Craig Smith, lover of all things feline, ducks, geese, chickens, and Mac. A-hem

"Absolutely unbelievably foul language and first-person viewpoint of teenage sexual intercourse. Yes, yes, everyone assumes that all teenagers speak and behave like this, but those of us who actually spend time with real teens (that are not our own children) have a little bit different perspective. The subjects of the discussions between Austin and his friends are also pretty hard to swallow; can one group of teens REALLY have ALL of those kinds of experiences? Is our society truly that twisted?"

 Um...

I won't really comment on the review itself. I think it is an honor to be the Queen of Filth, no matter how inaccurate it may be. I will say this, I think their reviews are a little unbalanced from reviewer to reviewer as the vampire/human sex scene mess-up-the-hotel-room get pregnant have fetus almost kill mom by sucking all nutrients and blood out of her then try to eat her way out only to have boyfriend (need I mention they are unmarried) have to bite the baby out of the stomach with his vampire teeth to save moms life, blood everywhere, book Breaking Dawn only received a MODERATE rating. WTF???

*cough*

Bow down to the Queen of Filth.

Friday Scribbles

Random iPod Shuffle Song: Say It Ain't So by Weezer



Book of the Week: Velveteen by my friend, Danny Marks. Dark and twisted. Love so far.

Redbox of the Week (there's an app for that): Crazy, Stupid, Love. Steve Carrell for the funny, Ryan Gosling for the eye candy. Yep, like.

Quote of the Week: "Writing? Sometimes it's not sacred. Sometimes it's like making ground beef by pressing a live cow through a colander. It's messy and hard and unglamorous and really quite insane, but at the end you still can eat a burger." ~ my amazing friend J Anderson Coats. She is a cross between brilliant and awesome. Awlliant? Click on her name. Buy her book. Seriously.

Mental Health Days

I'm sure you've all heard of taking the "Mental Health Day". It's one of those days when you HAVE to call in sick even though you're not quite sick, but you would feel cheated if you took a vacation day.  One of those days when work has you so completely exhausted, brain damaged, tired, frustrated ________________________(fill in blank with other appropriate word).

I'm not sure if I've mentioned this before, but I work for my father. I'm the marketing coordinator for his law firm. (yesterday's post had NOTHING to do with him btw) Anyway, so every time I call in sick, I either get a call from my mother or father asking what's wrong with me. See, my dad doesn't understand the whole "Mental Health Day" because I'm pretty sure he has 4,394,398 sick days racked up, probably never having taken a sick day in his entire life. So beyond saying, "my brain hurts" I just have to say, "I don't feel good." and leave it at that, which is hard because then there are usually a few probing questions about what EXACTLY is wrong, is it my head, my stomach, muscle or joint pain, flu, cold, sinus infection...the trials and tribulations of being the daughter of a personal injury attorney.

Some days the MHD's are used to catch up with work (not day job work, writing/revising/marketing work). Sometimes I need them to catch up on sleep. Sometimes, especially if I forget to take my meds for a couple days, I need a real MHD. haha, *cough* though that's happened a couple times, I try NOT to let that happen.

I admit this habit has rubbed off on my kids a bit. Thing Two is at home right now having an MHD. She's catching up on homework, practicing for a big choir concert, and doing some cleaning in the house. I think it's fine. She doesn't miss that much school and she's a good kid. She knows she's not to play xbox, be on the computer unless it's for homework, or watch TV (crap, I think I forgot to tell her about TV, need to make a call).

Anyway, I think we're all entitled to a Mental Health Day every so often. In fact, I think it should be added to our benefits on top of our vacation and sick leave.  I don't think six a year would kill an employer, do you? Go to your union reps and your office managers now and ask for, no demand your MHD! Your sanity depends on it.

People should...

...do their own job and shut their pie hole about everything else.

...not give the go ahead on a project then get mad when it's done too efficiently.

...help when they are asked.

...come to grips that they just do not get it and probably never will.

...don't put someone on project overload then complain when it's not done in a timely manner.

...listen to the answer when they ask a question so they don't keep asking it a million times.

Okay. I'm done. Today's rant was brought to you by the number 1 and the letters FU.

Overloaded, Again

How does this happen? I'm fine then all of a sudden I feel like I'm being pulled a million different directions, on the verge of being torn into pieces and that my head is likely to implode.

I nearly stepped down in one my groups yesterday, feeling particularly worthless.

I'm running around to tennis matches, soccer games, school visits, errands, 5k class, grocery store.

I'm writing, blogging, posting, editing, working, waiting, marketing , networking exercising. Yes waiting is a thing.

I'm behind on bills, laundry, dishes, car maintenance, yardwork, housework in general.

I need to list. prioritize. organize. abide. breathe.

I just don't know how. sigh.

How the hell does anyone do this? Got any tips?