Arlene Miller's Blog, page 48

Who Goes to Book Festivals, Anyway?

Books. Wonderful things, they are! Most people seem to like books. Some people are happy now that they can carry thousands of books around in a single electronic device – or even read on their phones (which isn’t so bad at all – I have read books on my phone). Other people just like the feel and smell of a real book with pages that turn. Some people like to collect them and show them on walls full of shelves. 

Some people gravitate toward bestsellers. Others like classics, and others like collecting rare books and first editions. Books are great because there are books for every age and interest: how-to, history, science, mystery, thriller, romance, fantasy (and grammar, of course!) . . .

And now that publishing one’s own book is easy, there are so many books and so many authors to choose from! Now, local, unknown, self-published authors put out fabulous books – just like more famous authors.

Although the number of  big New York publishers has dwindled, self-publishing (with the help of Amazon) is flourishing, so publishing has changed, but is still big business.

Book events of various types abound. There are big publishing shows like Book Expo in New York City, and the huge annual show in Frankfurt, Germany. These are trade shows for publishers (and authors), where it is expensive to set up a booth and expensive to attend. 

Then, we have writer’s conferences, different from book trade shows. Every year San Francisco has a big one. Although there are some vendors (I was one once), writer’s conferences generally invite authors of various genres – as well as people in various aspects of publishing – to speak. So these conferences are more about craft than a book expo, which is more of a publishing trade show.

Author events are popping up everywhere, mostly at bookstores, where both famous and not-so-well-known authors appear to sell and sign their books, and often to speak. Often these are book “launches,” meaning the rollout of a new book. I have done several of these at my favorite local bookstore. Famous authors can draw hundreds of people, sometimes requiring a larger venue to be found by the bookstore. On the other hand, local and unknown authors can sometimes stand behind a table at a signing and – sit there alone. It has happened to lots of authors!

Another type of book event is the book festival or book fair. These are really like street fairs and are generally held outside – sometimes downtown somewhere, sometimes at a shopping mall. My home, Sonoma County, used to have one, but it has gone away; no one wanted to run it any longer. And authors often complained they didn’t sell any, or many books, at this type of event.

I was invited to the Great Valley Bookfest in Manteca (CA) last weekend. Despite the two-hour drive each way, it was fun. It was well-run; there were lots of authors selling books, many of whom also made presentations; there was food; and it was held at a mall right next door to the Spirit of Halloween store.

There was plenty of foot traffic at the Bookfest. And it appeared that there were books being sold. I sold a decent number of books, although of course I wish I had sold a whole lot more! Who wants to carry the books back home again!

Who goes to an event like this? Well, it was a hot, sunny Saturday morning and afternoon, a good day to get out. Were people there because they wanted to go to a book festival or because they were going to the mall anyway – maybe to buy a Halloween costume? The event was well- enough publicized so that people heard about the festival, so I think many people were drawn to come out for the books. People like to look at books and chat with authors. Some even like to buy a book that is signed by the author. Then there were the used books for sale by the library – and free at the end of the day. 

But I always wonder: Sure, people might buy a fantasy book, or a kid’s book, or a cookbook at a book festival. But who is going to buy a grammar book at a book festival? Many of the people who stopped by my table were teachers or ex-teachers, quite understandably. I don’t know if this is true, but I think if people want a grammar book, they will buy it on Amazon where no one can see what they are buying.  Grammar books just don’t seem like an exciting thing to buy at a book festival — where you are admitting perhaps that you need it. But maybe that is just my assumption – and possibly quite an incorrect one, since I think I sell pretty well at these things compared to other authors. And do people want to buy a book by an unknown author? Is it a gamble? The books by us “unknowns”  are no less expensive, nor should they be, unless they are of a lesser quality – which most of them are not. Yes, sometimes there are some name authors at these events, but mostly not. 

The most disappointing part of the day was my presentation. There were lots of 30-minute presentations, several going on at once. I thought a lot about what I would talk about. And then, no audience! OK, a couple of the festival volunteers managed to drag a couple of people over to hear me. Grammar is often not a real crowd attraction. If only they knew how funny and entertaining it can be . . .

So, I don’t know who goes to book festivals. I would think it’s a little bit of everyone: book lovers, book collectors, people who happen to be wherever it is being held anyway, people who like to stroll around street fairs, and parents looking for books for their children. 

In any case, I had fun and met some nice people.

 

 

There Is a House in New Orleans . . .

 . . .they call the rising sun. . .

Do you remember ever being taught not to start a sentence with “There is . . .”?  You may have been, because it just isn’t a very good way to begin a sentence. It is called an expletive construction.

Why isn’t “There is” or “There are”  (or even “It is . . .”) a good way to begin a sentence?

Weak
Wordy
Sometimes difficult to know whether to use a singular or plural verb

Weak:

There is no need to read the entire article. Weak
You do not need to read the entire article. Stronger

Redundant:

There are many people who love the color blue. Wordy
Many people love the color blue. Concise

Confusing. Singular or Plural?

There are a bunch of bananas on the table?
 There is a bunch of bananas on the tab?

The subject is bunch, not bananas, so it is singular:

  A bunch of bananas is on the table
  There is a bunch of bananas on the table.

Generally, we think of the subject as being the first word in a sentence, and it often is. Subjects are either nouns or pronouns:

Jake took the rest of the cake home. (noun subject)
He took the rest of the cake home. (pronoun subject)

But we often (correctly) put something before the noun or pronoun: a word, a phrase, sometimes an entire clause:

Finally, Jake took the rest of the cake home. (a word)
After the party, Jake took the rest of the cake home. (phrase)
Because I didn’t want to eat it, Jake took the rest of the cake home. (clause)

All of the above sentences are fine. The subject doesn’t have to come first in a sentence. But “there” is a weird way to begin a sentence. It is not a noun, it is not a pronoun, and it is not a connecting word. While it may look like it is the subject, it isn’t. The subject would be somewhere after the verb in this type of construction. 

There is a house in New Orleans . . .
A house is there in New Orleans.  House is the subject.


There is a fly in the ointment.
A fly is there in the ointment. Fly is the subject.


There’s a bad moon on the rise.
A bad moon is on the rise. Moon is the subject.


There is a sucker born every day.
A sucker is born every day there. Sucker is the subject.

It is truly best not to begin a sentence with There is. Usually. Here are some more examples:

There is a pot of coffee already made. (weak)/A pot of coffee is ready and waiting for you.(better)
There isn’t a cloud in the sky. (weak)/ The sky is cloudless. (better)
There is a spider on the wall. (weak)/ A spider is crawling up the wall. (better)
There is a meeting you need to attend. (weak)/ You need to attend the meeting. (better)
There is no telling what he will do next. (weak)/ What he will do next is a mystery! (better)
There is a pencil and a pad of paper on the table. (Weak and grammatically incorrect)/A pencil and a pad of paper are on the table.

And isn’t “The sun is shining” stronger than “It is a nice day”?

Isn’t “It has been brought to my attention that you are stealing,” too wordy when you can just say,” I heard you are stealing”?

If you were told to avoid writing sentences that start with “There is . . .” or “Here is . . .” or “It is . . .” you got good advice! Of course, when we talk we often say what comes into our minds first. We say it, and it is gone. Writing is a bit different. You can plan it, and you can change it later.  And you can avoid beginning your sentences with “There is . . .”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Day at School

This is the final of three posts using words that have new meanings with the advent of technology:

A Day at School

Every day I walk down the path that leads me to the train platform, where I catch my ride to school. There is a history of violence in my neighborhood school, thus the long ride everyday to school. I guess the long rides to school and then home again do give me time to decompress. 

On the way to school I like to read — a real book. I love my special bookmark, which my grandma gave me and has a special poem on it. I also have an attachment to turning real pages. Right now I am reading a book about the Trojan Horse.

One problem about having such a long ride to school, though, is how early I need to get up! I like to open the bedroom window really early when I am just waking up to hear the tweets of the birds in spring and summer. And once in a while I can see a spider building a web right on my window!

When I get to school, I check in with the yard duty person, who walks around with a clipboard containing all our names. Minutes later we get the command to line up. My so-called friend, Greg, is usually right behind me, asking me if he can borrow my homework so he can copy it. He is such a user.

Once I get to my first class, I lay all my books out on the desktop. I take my tablet of paper out of my backpack and dig out this widget that is a fancy pen, but looks more like a garden tool! We all get up to get our folders where we keep the agenda for the day. 

According to the agenda, we are going to begin history class with a reading from an original document. It looks as if it was written on a scroll, and the syntax is really difficult to figure out! It is also written in a script that is hard to read. Some kids don’t seem to be paying much attention today. Joanne, who sits next to me, has a hacking cough. Beth, who sits in back of her, is pulling threads out of her uniform blouse. Cathy, who sits in front of me, seems to be finishing her art project with some paper and paste.

After the first class, we have a break. I will go check my inbox to see if I have any papers to bring home. Then, my friends Joel and Jasper and I will link arms and march to our next class!

———-

Remember when a path usually involved some dirt or grass?

And a platform was something you could see and really stand on?

Decompressing would make you feel calmer?

A bookmark was made of heavy paper and could fall out of your book?

An attachment often involved feelings?

A Trojan Horse wasn’t something that crashed your computer?

A clipboard was sturdy and something you carried around?

A command could be heard? Often loudly?

Kids had to actually put some effort in copying your homework?

Users were people who took advantage of your generosity?

A desktop was a place to put your coffee and enjoy the mess of papers?

A tablet was something you wrote on — or swallowed with a glass of water?

A widget was something someone invented and made a lot of money from? Even if you didn’t know what the heck it was?

Folders were those impossibly messy things full of papers in your two-drawer file cabinet?

History was something you might not want to repeat — and not a list of websites you have visited?

A document could give you a paper cut?

A scroll could be unrolled and read?

Syntax was something you learned in English class?

A script had lines you memorized?

Hacking was done by someone with a cough — not Russia  or China or a 400-pound man sitting on a bed.

Threads were something you wore?

Paste was sticky? And some kids ate it?

An inbox was stuffed with papers you would throw away rather than messages you could simply delete.

Links were not things you pressed on to go somewhere else?

*******************************************************

Now on Amazon! These books can be used together. However, each one can easily stand by itself. Both books have the same table of contents. The new workbook contains exercises and tests along with explanations and examples. The workbook is not yet available as an e-book, and is right now just available on Amazon. It will be available for order everywhere in a week or two. Buy the book on Amazon. Buy the workbook on Amazon. (Reviews are always appreciated! Thank you!)

National Punctuation Day!?.,:;”

National Punctuation Day

September 24th

September 24 is National Punctuation Day so I thought I would write this weeks post using no punctuation just to prove how important punctuation is the primary purpose of punctuation is to make writing clearer by showing us where we stop where we pause where we are asking a question and where we are exclaiming something and of course when we are directly quoting someone punctuation has been in the news lately because of texting common thought is that a period at the end of a text changes the tone of the text to one that is less friendly than probably intended I just decided to eliminate capital letters to begin sentences in this blog post because if there is no period there is no capital letter required of course I am keeping the capital I in the pronoun I because well that is just the way it is done I personally like punctuation especially the semicolon which many people dont like to use because maybe they are uncomfortable using it it really isnt very confusing and has far fewer rules than lets say commas which have about a zillion rules the main rule of using commas is to always have a reason to use one this can be a little complicated because the final rule of commas is to use one wherever not using one would cause confusion so I guess that one is pretty much up to the writer 

one of the longstanding controversies about commas is whether or not to use one after the last item in a series of three or more that comma usage is called the Oxford comma its use has been bandied about for years and goes in and out of style I don’t know if it is currently in or out but I always use it it often clears up confusion such as in the sentence I am not voting for Jill Stein the doctor and the Green Party candidate is that a good example well it will have to do for now it will be difficult to understand since there is no punctuation here at all anyway

I hope we all appreciate the importance of punctuation for example the elimination of a single comma can be fatal as in the case of lets eat grandma and don’t worry even though I burned the roast we will eat my children

many people are really fond of a particular punctuation mark for me as I said it is the semicolon which is difficult to overuse however people do overuse punctuation marks such as the exclamation point and the dash many writers just love to use the long dash over and over again and the same is true of the exclamation point which should be used very sparingly and never twice in a row additionally please don’t end a sentence with a question mark and an exclamation point you will have to choose one or the other

I have read this blog post over and i actually didn’t have much trouble figuring out what it said but maybe that is because I wrote it in that case maybe punctuation isnt as important as we think it is maybe we should just eliminate it and while we are at it perhaps we should eliminate all vowels as well because it seems that people have no trouble reading something when all the vowels are lmntd

could you read that last word in the previous paragraph the one where the vowels have been lmntd well that is about all I have to say about punctuation for now so you can decide whether or not you want to use it any longer I would advise that you continue to use it just in case

Happy National Punctuation Day!!!!!!!!!

Coming soon to Amazon and all other online retailers in paperback! (e-book coming too!)

 

Probly Mischeevious!

As you can see, the two words in the title of this post are misspelled. I intentionally (of course) misspelled them because that is the way they are usually (mis)pronounced. This post is about some commonly mispronounced words.

The word that bothers me the most when mispronounced has to be mischievous. I think just about all my 7th grade students pronounced it incorrectly, but then so does almost everyone else. In fact, my students told me I was wrong when I told them the correct pronunciation of this word. They insisted that it is pronounced mischeevious, with the accent on the middle syllable (wrong) and the i stuck in the last syllable (wrong). Look at the ending of the word, spelled correctly. It is -vous. The final -ous is pronounced -us: famous, glamorous, humorous –– you get the idea. Same with mischievous. It is pronounced the same as mischief, with the accent on the first syllable. Just turn the f into a v and add -us. Some people don’t even turn the f all the way into a v when they pronounce it.

Now that we have that all cleared up, here are some other commonly mispronounced words:

Probably is usually pronounced as a two-syllable word (prob-ly), when it actually has three syllables. Try to leave the middle syllable there.

I often hear often pronounced with the t. The preferred pronunciation is with a silent t.

Across has no t at all, silent or otherwise. It isn’t acrost.

Height doesn’t end with a -th. I don’t know where heighth came from, but I never heard anyone say weighth!

Jewelry is another tricky one. It isn’t jew-lery (separation of church and accessories!); it is jewel-ry, with the jewel generally pronounced more like  jule.

Selling your house? You might contact a real-tor, not a re-la-tor. Two syllables only.

Here’s a good one. You pronounce something, but when pronounce turns from a verb into a noun, we lose the second -o. It is pronunciation, not pronounciation.

And you want to order a pre-scription, not a per-scription. 

Of course, there are the old standby mispronunciations: liberry and Febuary — instead of library and February.

Grammar Diva News:

Within a couple of weeks, The Best Little Grammar Workbook Ever! will be available. If you would like a PDF copy of the book (just for you and not to share) so that you can review it on Amazon when it is brand new, contact me at info@bigwords101.com. I still have a few more PDF copies to give.

And if you live anywhere near Manteca, you will want to check out the BookFest. It is on Saturday, October 8.  I will be on Authors Alley and will be giving a presentation at noon.

 

 

Trending This Week in Adjectives!

What???? There is actually grammar news? I think so. Someone (thank you, Murray) sent me a copy of a Tweet about adjectives. I found it interesting and thought perhaps I would take his advice and do a blog post about it. Then, I saw it popping up in other places on the internet. It is something that you know, but you don’t know you know it.  And, actually, if English is not your native language, perhaps you don’t take it for granted. What is this mysterious adjective thing?

Let’s say we have a truck. Truck, being a thing, is a noun. Now, let’s say it is a delivery truck. Hmmmm, I guess most, if not all, trucks are delivery trucks. That is the function of most trucks.  But bear with me.

Let’s say this is a wooden truck (sounds more like a toy truck now, but let’s keep going). So, now it is a wooden delivery truck. And let’s say that this truck comes from Canada. It is now a Canadian wooden delivery truck.

The truck is red. It is a red Canadian wooden delivery truck. And let’s say it is square (rather than maybe rectangular).  Now it is a square red Canadian wooden delivery truck.

You can tell by the fresh paint on the truck that this truck is quite new. In fact it is just a year old.  It is a year-old square, red Canadian wooden delivery truck. Since this truck is square and not rectangular, we might guess that for a truck, it is on the small side. So, it is a smallish year-old square red Canadian wooden delivery truck.

Because this truck is new and painted red, it’s pretty shiny. It’s a shiny smallish year-old square red Canadian wooden delivery truck!

Yes, I know that there should be some commas in that long series of adjectives that all describe that one noun, truck.  But since you probably wouldn’t ever string that many adjectives together before a noun anyway, let’s not worry about the commas right now. 

So . . . we have a red square shiny wooden Canadian smallish delivery year-old truck, right?

Or is it a Canadian shiny wooden red delivery smallish year-old square truck?

No. Wait . . . it’s a delivery red smallish Canadian square year-old wooden shiny truck.

What’s going on here? Okay. There is one order in which to write adjectives before a noun (and you don’t have to have eight adjectives before the noun; you can have two or three or four). We don’t even think about it; we just know it sounds right that way. These just sound wrong:

Green big ball (big green ball)
Pepperoni large pizza (large pepperoni pizza)
Wooden round table (round wooden table)
Pink beautiful dress (beautiful pink dress)

Here is the “rule” we follow without even thinking. Adjectives in English must be in this order (or, as the original Tweet said, you will sound like a maniac):

   opinion  – size  – age – shape – color – origin – material – purpose – noun

   shiny  – smallish – year-old – square – red – Canadian – wooden – delivery – truck

And now you know.

If you want to see the original tweet (and it looks like other interesting tweets, here is the link.

Grammar Diva News

This coming Sunday, September 11, I will be heading up the editing/proofreading table at the Redwood Writers roundtable. Here is the info.

I will be appearing at the Manteca BookFest on Saturday, October 8 and it’s free!

The Writer’s World Vendor Faire, sponsored by Bay Area Independent Publishers Association, takes place on November 12. I will be one of the vendors (editing), along with designers and a host of other vendors important to writers!

My new book, The Best Little Grammar Workbook Ever! will be available within the next few weeks. It can be used by itself or as a companion workbook to The Best Little Grammar Book Ever, Second Edition.

Remember When? “The Party”

I am really not crazy about parties, but last week I let a friend drag me to one. It was given by someone in my friend’s networking group. We had a little trouble finding the house because according to the directions on my cell phone, the address we had didn’t exist. It probably would have been easier to take the bus! 

Although there wasn’t a cloud in the sky all day, the evening was chilly, so I am glad I had a backup plan for the summer dress I was planning to wear. I ended up wearing jeans and my new boots.

We knew we had arrived at the right party site when we saw a huge “Party” banner over the front windows. We saw another sign that said “Enter” when we walked up to the front door. The party was crowded, and as the evening wore on, I found many of the guests quite unfriendly. I did talk to one nice guy who liked to surf, and that’s all he talked about for twenty minutes.

I wasn’t too sure about the food. There were these little things that looked as if they were made out of spam. Thank goodness, there were also chips and dip. And I was not going to drink because I was the designated driver. 

There was a good live band, although the host said it wasn’t the band they had wanted. Their first choice had another gig that evening, and the leader of the second-choice band had a virus. In one big room, people were watching some kind of science fiction program. In another room, a group of people were playing Password.

As I said, I am not a party lover, so I was glad when we left, and the party became just a memory!

—————————————-

 Remember when . . . 

You got dragged to a party or took a drag on a cigarette instead of dragging something across a screen?

Networking meant schmoozing in a group of live people? And a network had most of your favorite TV shows?

Cells were in prisons, not phones?

Addresses applied to houses not websites?

Buses were things people rode so they wouldn’t have to park in the city?

Backup replied to a plan rather than to a computer?

A boot went on your foot, and there were no reboots?

There were construction sites and movie sites, but  no websites?

Banners were hung up and not displayed on the top of your Twitter page?

Windows were made of glass, and they broke? (I guess they still do break!)

Enter was written on a door and not a key?

You actually knew your friends and you could ignore them, but you couldn’t really unfriend them?

Surfing required waves?

Spam was something icky that you ate, not something icky you got by e-mail?

Chips were served in bowls – with dip?

Drivers needed licenses?

Gigs didn’t have bytes?

A virus made you sick rather than making a machine sick?

Programs were on television?

Password was a quiz show, not something you could never remember — because you have 700 of them?

Memory was a pleasant remnant of the past?

Coming Soon! Here is the preliminary cover for my next book, which will be out within the next few weeks. It is a small workbook that can be used by itself or with the second edition of  The Best Little Grammar Book Ever!

Lots of exercises and quizzes. Here is the chapter listing:

The Basics: Parts of Speech
The Basics: Sentence Structure
Punctuation
Capitalization
Things to Avoid
Confusing Things
Important Grammar Issues
Questions You Might Have
Complete Answer Key

 

 

 

Tea for Two/To/Too

To – Two – Too: When these three words are confused, it is probably just a typo because it seems most people have these figured out. Two is the number, too means also, and the other one is the “where” kind of to.

To get a little more grammatical about it:

To is a preposition, starting a prepositional phrase: 

to the bank
to me
to school

But what about the to that isn’t in a prepositional phrase, but is put right before a verb to indicate an infinitive?

to go
to run
to watch

According to the sources I have found, the to that is part of an infinitive is also a preposition. I disagree, but I don’t know what else it would be. Anyone know? 

Two is the number and can be either an adjective or a noun:

I have two cats. (adjective)
Please write the word two on the board. (noun)
I have three cards left, a 7, a 6, and a 2. (noun)

But this blog post is mostly about too and how you punctuate it. Too, coincidentally, has two meanings, both adverbs:

Too can mean “an overly great amount”: The coffee is too hot to drink.
Too can also mean also. 

When too means “an overly great amount,” you don’t have to worry about any punctuation. However, when too means “also,” you have to worry about commas.

When too is in the middle of the sentence somewhere — and it means “also” — you need to set if off with commas: I, too, would like to go to the movies with you.
However — Surprise! When too is at the end of the sentence, there is no comma before it. Many people put a comma before too when it ends the sentence, but no comma is needed. It seems that way back we might have learned to put a comma before too at the end of the sentence, but there is no comma: I want to go too.

If you used also instead of too at the end of the sentence, you probably would not think to put a comma. So, it is the same with using too. No comma.

I would like to go shopping also. (not that you would ever say it that way!
I wold like to go shopping too.

So, you can stop putting that comma before the too at the end of the sentence. One less comma to worry about!

—————————————————————-

Grammar Diva News:

September 11, I am leading the editing/proofreading section of the Redwood Writers Roundtables. You are invited!

October 8, I will be at the Great Valley Book Fest in Manteca, and it’s free!

 

 

Trump and the English Language

Disclaimer: If you are a supporter of Trump, you may not like this post. However, I did try to be nice. 

There has been some discussion about Donald Trump’s language: about how he talks at the level of a fifth grader, etc. I have compiled a list of comments about Trump and words. I actually had no plans to do a blog post like this, but at 4:30 one morning, suffering from insomnia (or TAD – Trump anxiety disorder), these thoughts for a blog post came into my head. I picked up my phone and furiously began typing notes into it, so I wouldn’t forget these thoughts. I must confess that they made a bit more sense at 4:30 a.m. than when I looked at them at a more reasonable hour, but I am going to give it a go anyway! After all, we do talk about words and language here.

To Donald Trump:

You are actually quoted as saying “I have the best words.” I don’t agree that you have the best words, but if you do, please share them, or give them back to the people you took them from.
I notice that you must think your words are indeed the best, because you tend to say the same thing over and over again. There is redundancy, and then there is broken record. I am not talking about saying the same thing repeatedly over a matter of days or weeks. I am talking about saying the same thing three or four times, right in a row. We get it the first time.
Please tell Melania that she has to use her own words, not those borrowed from the opposing party — especially without giving attribution.
Last week you said you weren’t being “that sarcastic.” You are either being sarcastic or you aren’t.
Words can hurt. Perhaps you should think before you speak. Or don’t speak.
Please finish one sentence before starting the next. When you go off in a million directions, we just don’t know what to think. So we tend to create our own opinions about your words. And your mental state.
People don’t like braggarts. However, since you are 70 years old and have been bragging for most of that time, we don’t expect anything to change.
While we are talking about stealing other people’s words and bragging . . . who wrote that doctor’s letter saying you are the healthiest person ever to run for president — and why was the letter addressed “To Whom My Concern:”? Something fishy there.
Huge begins with an H , not a Y !
Sometimes hyperbole sounds — I don’t know — kind of weird? “I have one of the great temperaments.” Who says things like this????????
Last time I checked my dictionary, bigly was not a word.
Going back to number one: You very recently stated that sometimes, “You don’t use the right words.” Well, first of all, I believe the pronoun starting that statement should have been I rather than you. Second, if you have all the best words, you should be able to use the appropriate ones at the appropriate time.  Third, “regretting” that sometimes you don’t use the right words from your storehouse of the best words is not an apology of any type. Apologies contain the word sorry or I apologize — followed by something specific. Regrets are self-serving.
Not everything can be said in 140 characters or fewer.

Sincerely,

The Grammar Diva

Grammar Diva News:

Join us at the Redwood Writers meeting September 11. We are having “speed dating roundtables.” I will be the editing/proofreading expert. Check it out.
My next book should be out within the next month or two! It is called The Best Little Workbook Ever! and is a companion to my latest released book, The Best Little Grammar Book Ever! Second Edition. You can use them separately or as a pair. The workbook contains explanations along with exercises and tests. The book contains more explanation and examples. No workbook cover to show you quite yet.

 

Remember When? A Little Story About Cookies

Cookie, Anyone?

Yesterday, I baked a batch of cookies. I cut them into cute shapes, and I opened the oven to bake them. I had copied the recipe from my great-grandmother’s  recipe file, which we found among the things we had put into storage when she passed away. When the cookies looked done, I took a small byte. I found that they were not quite cooked enough, so I put them back into the oven and closed the door. In a few minutes, I cut one of the bars and tried another bit of my great-grandmother’s apple cinnamon bars to discover that they were perfect! I am hosting a big party tonight, and my kids, whom I have employed as servers, will pass the cookies around to the guests.

The party was a great success, but there was so much food left over, including some of the cookies. I let the kids share some of the leftover cookies. I always make way too much food, so they didn’t finish all the cookies. I figure they can bring them to school. We have had a few problems with bugs in the past – and I even caught a mouse recently — so I saved them in a zip-lock bag with a tag that said “World’s Best Cookies.”

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I guess you can see what I am getting at here.

Remember when . . . 

Apples were a fruit, not something you chose instead of a PC?
Opening and closing things required a tiny bit of elbow grease, not just a click?
Bits and bytes (bites) tasted good?
A batch of cookies smelled good, and you didn’t have to delete them?
A mouse and bugs scurried and flew — and hopefully didn’t go near you or your computer?
You needed a knife or a pair of scissors to cut something?
You hosted parties, not websites?
Servers were humans, sometimes wearing white aprons?
Copying a paper was cheating and required some writing or typing?
Storage took up a lot of space? Real space, not virtual space.
If you wanted to find a file , you looked in a cabinet?
You either saved the rest of your school lunch, shared   it with a friend, or threw it away?
A zipper could get stuck?
A tag had a price that was usually too high?

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Grammar Diva News

If you are interested in the various aspects of writing and publishing, I will be participating in a roundtable discussion, presented by Redwood Writers on Sunday, September 11. I will be discussion the editing and proofreading portion of the topic.  Click here for more information.

Yes, I just released my latest book, the second edition of The Best Little Grammar Book Ever! now available at your local Copperfield’s Books and on Amazon.com. If you have the book or purchase the book, reviews on Amazon, Goodreads, or your favorite site are always greatly appreciated!

And so soon . . . another book? Yes! The Best Little Grammar WORKbook Ever!  that accompanies the new second edition is currently at the page designer and will be released some time in September. You can use them together, or you can certainly use each one alone. Both the book and the workbook cover the same material with the same exact table of contents. However, obviously the grammar workbook is full of quizzes, tests, and practice exercises. No cover yet to show you.