C.C. Payne's Blog

Come on Over!

Hey, y'all! I have a new (online) home at www.ccpayne.net!

I'm transitioning my blog over to that site, so this will be my last entry here. If you're receiving my blog by email and you want to continue receiving it, you'll need to come on over to www.ccpayne.net and sign up again, on the "Blog" page--sorry!--last time, I promise!

Anyway, I'm especially excited about the "Superstar Librarians" page of my new website, which allows me to spotlight marvelous media specialists and librarians who fight hard--competing with TVs, gaming devices, computers, social media, and cell phones--to get good books into the hands of kids on a daily basis. These people are my personal heroes!

To learn more, or to tell me about an outstanding librarian you know, come on over to www.ccpayne.net and see us, hear? Please? 

Winning the Doggie-Lottery

On October 28, 2003, I went to visit a dog at the Bowling Green Warren County Humane Society. They brought the three-year-old dog, Duchess, who'd been at the shelter longer than any other dog, out to play with me in a grassy area. But Duchess didn't play. Instead, she came to sit next to me, leaning her entire body against me, in a sort of armless hug.

I called my husband, Mark, to inform him that I couldn't possibly live another day without this dog. Mark, an extremely wise man, said, "Okay then."

Turned out, I had to live two more days without Duchess--which was hard, very hard, but I made it: I loaded Duchess into my car immediately after she was spayed on October 30th, when she was still woozy from anesthesia, and made the hour drive home, amazed that no one else had adopted her during her months at the shelter--I couldn't believe my luck!--I felt like I'd won the doggie-lottery!

Upon arriving home, I learned that I couldn't lift a 100 pound dog out of the car. I went to get Mark, who came right out to help me. He leaned into the backseat, took a good look at Duchess, and then stood up again. "God Almighty," he said, "that's the ugliest dog I've ever seen in my life."

I was like, "Huh? What're you talking about?! Look again!"

Mark carried Duchess into the house. She immediately went to the darkest, quietest, least-used room, the dining room, and hunkered down for the rest of the night.

Later, when I went to check on our six-year-old daughter, Laurel, she wasn't in her bed. I found her curled up next to Duchess, both of them asleep on the dining room floor.

After that, in return for us choosing her, Duchess chose us right back. She went everywhere we went--to visit family in Kentucky, to the beach for vacations, and to the bathroom (yes, really)--she always stayed close by, never had to be leashed, and obeyed our every command. 


We knew it was time to get up when we heard her tail thumping against the floor. We knew it was time for bed when grizzly-bear-worthy snoring filled our room and vibrated our bed--literally. And at all times in between, we knew she was watching over us. Duchess once leapt into the air and ate a bumble bee that had been buzzing around Laurel, scaring her, and causing her to stand frozen and crying. She stood stubbornly between me and every workman that ever came to the house.

It wasn't long before Mark recognized Duchess for what she was: the most gentle, loyal, loving, and beautiful creature on four legs. He painted a portrait of her soon after, as a Christmas gift for me.

I have always cherished the painting and I cherish it even more today. The night before last was Duchess's last night with us. As on her first night with us, she chose a place that was dark, quiet, and lonely, to rest: my closet. But, just like that first night, she soon had a friend sleeping on the floor beside her: me.

I will miss her. I do miss her. Painfully. (Did you know that it's possible to cry so much that your eyes get chapped? Well, it is. Apparently.) But more than that, I am so grateful for the life of Duchess, so glad we found her, so glad she got to be our dog, and we got to be her people. In other words, I still think we won the doggie-lottery. No, I KNOW we did.

Readers Rock!

How so? Well, for starters, readers tend to be very well-traveled. For them, a trip to Venice, Paris, or New Orleans is as close as the local library. I, personally, have traveled the world many times over through books. Also, readers are never alone--unless they choose to be. I always carry a whole cast of fascinating characters with me where ever I go. They make me laugh. They make me cry. They comfort me. They inspire me. They're like friends. In my purse. (If you ask me, interesting people who fit into your purse and have no need for food, drink, bathrooms, or medication, are highly desirable friends.) What's more, I've learned almost everything I know by reading: how to cook, sew, grow a garden, build a pond, and yes, how to write. You can learn just about anything from books--except for maybe how to dance. If a reader can learn anything, then a reader can do anything--except dance, of course. For example, I have a friend who once needed $3,000 worth of repairs on her car. She didn't have the $3,000. So, she spent $30 on a book about how to repair her car and did it herself! (This particular reader can probably dance, too--she's just that kind of girl.) The point? There's no limit to where a reader can go, the kinds of people they can get to know, or what they can learn and accomplish! The more we read, the more we know, the better we do, and the farther we go! The future only grows bigger, brighter, and more promising for readers. For that reason, I'm partnering with Amazon to donate my new novel, Lula Bell on Geekdom, Freakdom & the Challenges of Bad Hair, to WorldReader. For every copy of the book sold by Amazon, another copy will be donated to children in the developing world. Additionally, Amazon is offering the hardcover at 75% off right now, so for $4.25, you get a book and you give a book! Books--and big, bright futures--for all! (Click here to purchase: http://www.amazon.com/Lula-Bell-Geekdom-Freakdom-Challenges/dp/0761462252/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1354632507&sr=1-1&keywords=lula+bell+on+geekdom) Merry Christmas, dear readers! Rock on! 

Lula Bell's Discussion Guide

LULA BELL ON GEEKDOM, FREAKDOM & THE CHALLENGES OF BAD HAIR Discussion Questions

1.) Who was your favorite character and why?


2.) What do you think motivated Kali to torment Lula Bell? Do wolves have something to teach us about the way to handle this type of situation? How would you react if you were being picked on by a classmate?


3.) What did you think about Lula Bell giving Grandma Bernice’s quilt to Kali? Would you have done the same thing? Why or why not?


4.) Do you believe Kali can or will change? Is it possible that she could grow up to be a nice person?


5.) Lula Bell wasn’t always nice; were you bothered by the way she treated Alan throughout most of the story? Why do you think Alan was so determined to remain Lula Bell’s friend?


6.) There are nice nerds like Alan at every school. Are you friends with any of them? Why or why not?


7.) Why do you think most of us try so hard to fit in? Do you think Grandma Bernice was right when she said that we’re “made to stand out”? If that’s true, then why is it so difficult for most of us?


8.) Why do you think girls/women spend so much time trying to change or “improve” their looks? Have you ever done anything silly in an effort to change or “improve” your looks?


9.) Do you believe that Uncle Cleburne saw Grandma Bernice, as he claimed, in his last seconds of life? Why or why not?


10.) Do you agree with Grandma Bernice when she says we should always leave a place nicer than we found it? If so, what are some ways that you might do this?


To open and print this discussion guide in document form, visit my website at www.ccpayne.net . Thanks, y'all!

An Interactive Thanksgiving

Oh how I wish I could invite every single one of you to my house for Thanksgiving, so that I could thank you in person for your friendship, readership, support, and encouragement! I would feed you and fuss over you until both your belly and your heart are full to bursting--and then I would load you up with leftovers to take home, as is the southern way! But since my house isn't anywhere near as big as my gratitude, instead, I am offering to visit, read, speak, and sign books at any Kentucky school that can get a minimum of 100 students to order Lula Bell on Geekdom, Freakdom & the Challenges of Bad Hair (for signing) during the month of November. For those of you outside of Kentucky, I am offering to phone-in or Skype with any book club that selects Lula Bell... for reading during the month of November (you don't have to read in November; you just have to select the book for your reading list). I'm giving away three copies of Lula Bell...on www.goodreads.com (winners will be randomly selected by goodreads). Finally, I'll send autographed copies of both my novels to the person who has referred the most subscribers to my blog ( www.wherethebluegrassgrows.blogspot.com ) by midnight on November 30. (Just have the new subscribers shoot me an email at authorccpayne@gmail.com telling me the email address of the person who referred them, so that I can contact the winner, find out how they want the books signed and where to send them.) I hope to see you, speak with you, or send books to you soon! Until then, know that you are among the blessings I'll be counting this Thanksgiving!
 

I would've called you but . . .

I'm busy showing you how much I love you.

See, like most children of the South, I was raised not to be bothersome to other people--outside of my own home. In public, I was taught not to trouble anybody by asking for anything (I could accept whatever might be offered--a drink, for example, but I was not to ask for something to drink). No, in public, I was to speak only when spoken to, and then I was to use my very best manners, as in, "Yes, ma'am, I'd love some water. Thank you." Other than that, I was expected to sit still, quietly, and with my legs crossed, until it was time to go home. If I got bored, I was encouraged to read.

I was not encouraged to ask the thirty-two million burning questions I had at any given moment--because the answers were, no doubt, in a book somewhere that I could read. Fidgeting, making noise, or any kind of a mess, were also strictly prohibited.

Naturally, I've carried these lessons forward into my adult life. Unfortunately, not everyone understands that by not calling, not disturbing, not asking for anything, I am showing DEEP LOVE AND RESPECT. Hard to believe, isn't it? I know!

Maybe you're thinking my parents were too hard on me. I think not. A case in point: A few years ago, when I visited New Orleans for the first time with my best friend of nearly twenty years, I asked so many questions on the first day that she--MY BEST FRIEND!--finally turned to me and said something like, "Catherine, honey, I love you dearly, but we're going to need to find somebody else for you to question . . . because if you ask me one more question, I'll be forced to stab you. Violently and repeatedly. And I'll miss you. Later. But not now." So you can kind of see what my parents were up against. I think it's fair to say that we all owe them. Especially my best friend. (I bought several books about New Orleans, which is probably the reason I'm still alive today.)

Bottom line: If I haven't called you in a while--or ever--you should probably count your blessings, and you should definitely count my love and respect among them!

P.S. Happy birthday, Uncle Bob! I would call you, but I don't want to interrupt the celebration. Because I love you. You get that, right?

It all comes down to lunch.

In two weeks, my new novel, Lula Bell on Geekdom, Freakdom & and the Challenges of Bad Hair will be released. It took a dozen or so grown folks on both sides of the Mason Dixon, four years, and two dogs (dogs are very encouraging) to get to this point. And here we are. Lula Bell and me. All clean and pressed and ready to go. Standing on our front porch, looking out into the great, wide world, we feel hopeful. And just a teensy bit nervous.

It's a lot like the first day of school: We hope we look okay and smell okay and don't have anything stuck in our teeth. We hope we don't embarrass ourselves. We hope nobody else will embarrass us either--by picking on us. (So far, so good. Our first review, from Kirkus Reviews said, "With an authentic voice, the wryly humorous Lula Bell contemplates life and the nature of true friendship with distinctive candor. Payne's hopeful tale encourages readers to rejoice in what makes them unique.") We also hope we won't be alone. We hope we can find some old friends and make some new ones, too. Preferably both. By lunchtime. Because everybody knows that it all comes down to lunch, right? Hey, what are you doing over lunch? Because the best way to face this type of thing...

...is together.

To read the first chapter of Lula Bell on Geekdom, Freakdom & and the Challenges of Bad Hair (over lunch or not), visit www.ccpayne.net and click on "Sneak-A-Peek" at the top of the home page.

To order the book, click here: http://www.amazon.com/Lula-Bell-Geekdom-Freakdom-challenges/dp/0761462252/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1339001290&sr=1-1

To harass your school media specialist or local librarian into ordering the book, visit your nearest library.

If you've done any of that, or even thought about doing any of that, thank you. If you've "liked" us on Facebook, thank you--and we like you right back! ( http://www.facebook.com/pages/c-c-payne/479926372023544 ) Thanks, y'all. Really. Thanks.

Aaawww.

This morning, my husband pointed out some glitter that had fallen out of our daughter’s backpack on her way down the stairs. But I didn’t rush to get the vacuum cleaner. Instead I said, “Aawww, how cute! Our little girl left behind a trail of fairy dust—don’t our stairs look…magical?” Well, I think they do. So I’m leaving the glitter. Until I know someone’s coming over.   Unlike the upside-down curtains hanging in my bedroom, which are staying exactly as they are, even if I receive word that Queen Elizabeth is coming for high tea, and wants to tour our home afterward. Because my husband hung these curtains all by himself, as a surprise for me, on the day we moved into this house. Every time I look at them—hanging from the hems—I remember how proud he was to show them to me, and I think…Aawww.

  If you ask me, perfection lies in imperfection—that’s where all the sweet stuff, the unexpected stuff, the human stuff is—the stuff that makes you say, “Aawww.”

The Magic Words

Recently, I learned THE magic words, from my beautiful and brilliant friend, Rosemary. No, the magic words aren’t, “I love you,” although those are good words, too. No, they aren’t, “I’m absolutely wrong and you’re absolutely right,” although these are also among my favorite words to hear—but not to say—ick! Basically, Rosemary was running down a teensy weensy, little bitty list of completely reasonable demands. When those demands were received with some slight hesitation, Rosemary then said the magic words, “It’s my birthday week!” I know, right? Like I said, brilliant! So last Sunday, I began saying (repeatedly): “It’s my birthday week!” As a result, here’s how the week shaped up: I did some birthday lake-lounging while reading—for several days—until the sun went down.


 On the way home...
My husband and I enjoyed a fabulous birthday couples’ massage.

My mom took me out for a super-fun, four hour birthday-lunch! (To our server: I’m sorry . . . but it’s my birthday week!)
My dad, stepmom, and sister had me over for the best birthday-dinner. (The best birthday-dinner consists of hamburgers and french fries, if on the inside, you’re still twelve—ish—which I am.) You’ll just have to take my word that these family members exist, since they wouldn’t like having their photos posted here—or anywhere, I think—whenever we visit Cracker Barrel, my stepmom takes a few minutes to feel sorry for the poor unsuspecting souls whose photos ended up on the walls there. (Note to self: Do not honor your stepmother by putting her photo on the wall of the local Cracker Barrel.)

But don’t worry: I wouldn’t expect you to take my word on the all important issue of birthday cake! Here it is!
This Baskin-Robbins chocolate-mint ice cream with chocolate cake has been my favorite for forty years now—everybody else in my family says they’re a little tired of it, but I’m not . . . and it’s my birthday week! (I’m told the question mark candle was chosen to prevent the small house fire that forty candles were sure to start—safety first, friends.)Why, I even rated a tiara—A TIARA!!!—from my sister, who obviously fully comprehends the concept of birthday week!
OF COURSE I look good...because I'm wearing a TIARA!!! With feathers!
Other thoughtful birthday gifts, flowers, and cards arrived all week long!
Even Lula Bell popped up to wish me a happy birthday!
And finally, Sunday brunch with girlfriends wrapped up my birthday week perfectly!


Yes, I highly, highlyrecommend using The Magic Words! Unfortunately, you have to wait until the week of your birthday. Otherwise, when you say to your people, “It’s my birthday week!” they—predictably (eyeroll)—respond, “No it isn’t.” Which is pretty rude if you ask me, but . . . well, either wait for your birthday or get some new people. Every week.

As for me, here’s what I’m thinking right this very moment: 51 weeks until my birthday week!
Thanks, Rosemary! 

Lula Bell Takes Manhattan!

Hey, y'all! Lula Bell Bonner here! Some call me the "protagonist" of C. C. Payne's new novel, Lula Bell on Geekdom, Freakdom & the Challenges of Bad Hair, but I prefer "star". Actually, I really prefer "super-star"! What? You don't believe that I'm a star? I am totally a star. Why, here I am at Book Expo America, in New York City, today, right this very minute, y'all! 
Look! I'm right next to R. L. Stine's Zombie Town! If that doesn't scream STARDOM then I don't know what does!

More ME! Less completely unnecessary other stuff!
Me again, in actual book form...with stickers that read, NOT FOR SALE and FALL 2012 and DO NOT REMOVE. (Do they mean the book or the sticker? Is this like those DO NOT REMOVE UNDER PENALTY OF LAW tags on pillows?)
See? I told you. No, I won't give you my autograph. Now. Because you didn't believe me when I tried to tell you that I'm a star! Hmph! But I will forgive you, no later than October 2nd, IF you will take me in and let me live at your house! To do that, click here: http://www.amazon.com/Lula-Bell-Geekdom-Freakdom-challenges/dp/0761462252/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1339001290&sr=1-1  Thanks! Can't wait!
Blowing kisses to all the many, MANY fans (of my dreams),

Lula Bell Bonner
Super-Star (almost)

Update: C. C. Payne just said, "Lula Bell, the only 'stars' in my state play basketball for the University of Kentucky." Hmph! Good thing I'm from Tennessee!