Maya Rodale's Blog: Maya Rodale's Blog, page 28

Sneak Peek of The Tattooed Duke!

Speaking of Housemaid Heroines and the books they star in…here's a snippet from The Tattooed Duke!

~Chapter 5: In which scrubbing floors is romantic~

 The following day found Eliza scrubbing the foyer floors and eating her words that "scrubbing floors was not anyone's idea of romance."

His Grace had strolled by and Eliza spent the next hour reliving all seven seconds that it took him to stroll through the foyer from the drawing room to his library, ogling her shamelessly all the while.

When the duke appeared, she had been on her hands and knees, in a position of utter supplication, and vexed with the strands of hair falling in her face. Her cheeks were flushed, due to steam arising from the bucket of hot soapy water.

 He did not ignore her, as he ought to do. She'd heard that servants in some households were required to turn and face the wall when their masters appeared.

Instead, the Duke indulged in a look that would have been horribly rude for the liberty of it. If she'd had a daughter, and a man looked at her thus, Eliza would have called him out for his hot, fierce gaze that freely swept slowly over her breasts, the dip in her back and the rise of her bottom. It was so brazen and so bold that she could feel it.

An hour later, she was still feeling it—the heat of it, the shock of it, the mock outrage and secret pleasure.

****

Like it? Order it.

Sneak Peek of The Tattooed Duke! 1/28

Speaking of Housemaid Heroines and the books they star in…here's a snippet from The Tattooed Duke!

~Chapter 5: In which scrubbing floors is romantic~

 The following day found Eliza scrubbing the foyer floors and eating her words that "scrubbing floors was not anyone's idea of romance."

His Grace had strolled by and Eliza spent the next hour reliving all seven seconds that it took him to stroll through the foyer from the drawing room to his library, ogling her shamelessly all the while.

When the duke appeared, she had been on her hands and knees, in a position of utter supplication, and vexed with the strands of hair falling in her face. Her cheeks were flushed, due to steam arising from the bucket of hot soapy water.

 He did not ignore her, as he ought to do. She'd heard that servants in some households were required to turn and face the wall when their masters appeared.

Instead, the Duke indulged in a look that would have been horribly rude for the liberty of it. If she'd had a daughter, and a man looked at her thus, Eliza would have called him out for his hot, fierce gaze that freely swept slowly over her breasts, the dip in her back and the rise of her bottom. It was so brazen and so bold that she could feel it.

An hour later, she was still feeling it—the heat of it, the shock of it, the mock outrage and secret pleasure.

****

Like it? Order it.

Chapter 2: About those rumors…

[image error]

Hmm...

The story continues! Lady Charlotte and James are still at the ball, where The Tattooed Duke himself is causing a scene and our dear heroines is prying "the truth" about those rumors from James. Or trying to.

Missed chapter one? Click here to read it. Wondering what's going on here? I'm writing a chapter a week of an original romance novella, and incorporating suggestions from readers. Choose your own romance, kittens!

 

~Chapter Two: About those rumors…~

 

The rumors were absolutely, categorically and completely false. James did not return to London to take a wife. He had returned as an agent of the crown on a mission: investigate claims that Lord Montrose sought to assassinate King George IV. Lord Montrose was notoriously reclusive, possibly mad. However, he did have a daughter on the marriage mart.

Hence the rumors regarding James's Great Wife Hunt.  It was the best way to gain close, unsuspicious access to his suspect.

Would it be worse to allow Charlotte to think he sought a bride or to know that he was a spy?

James was spared from answering by a most shocking turn of events

"Lady Shackley just slapped Tattooed Duke clear across his face!" Charlotte exclaimed gleefully. She grinned and pressed her palm to her cheeks. And then she remembered he was there. In fact, her hand still rested on his sleeve.

"I beg your pardon," she said, recovered her manners. "You were saying something. Something that had nothing to do with the outrageously ill-bred—and thus marvelously entertaining—behavior I just witnessed."

"I was not," James said quickly.

"You were saying something about taking a wife," she reminded him.

"No, you were, Lady Charlotte," James corrected. She sighed impatiently.

"James. We both know that I shall uncover all and any secrets. You might spare us both a spot of bother if you'd just tell me."

"Fine. I'm looking for a wife," he ground out. It was the lesser of two evils.

Lady Charlotte's eyes narrowed. No gentleman in his right mind ever uttered that sentence, particularly in the company of an unmarried miss. It was akin to sharing the combination on a safe containing a fortune in gold.

"My congratulations on your impending nuptials," Charlotte said with the particular smile he identified as wicked scheme developing in the warped brain of Lady Charlotte. "Given that you've been out of town for so very long, I shall help you identify some possible candidates for Mrs. Archer-Rhodes. Call on me tomorrow, James. I shall have a list of names for you."

Important question: who is on Lady Charlotte's Select List of Candidates For The Position Of Mrs. Archer-Rhodes?

Can you suggest names and/or personalities?  (Wallflower? Total diva? Close talker? Obsessed with puppies?) Let's make this outrageous!

Caption this pic! Win Prizes!

Penelope is at it again. That little dog stole my one and only copy of The Tattooed Duke! Here she is, caught in the act! But really, who can blame her? (Especially when she looks so darn cute.) Methinks this picture needs a caption and I've got an assortment of gorgeous coverflats, including one of The Tattooed Duke, for the one that makes me laugh the most.

[image error]

"Surely you can come up with a caption for a pic with a darling dog like ME, Penelope."

Romancing "The Help"

The Housemaid Heroine  is a rare creature in romance, probably because domestic drudgery isn't very romantic, especially historical domestic drudgery. Romance and chamber pots just don't match. However there are some perks to this scenario (provided some other anonymous maid gets the worst chores), as I discovered when writing The Tattooed Duke.

My housemaid heroine, Miss Eliza Fielding, is actually a Writing Girl in disguise as a servant in the scandalous household of the shocking Duke of Wycliff, aka The Tattooed Duke. After all, what better way to unearth all of his secrets? Exactly.

As long as the domestic drudgery isn't too detailed, I think heroes and heroines as household help can make for delicious novels. Here's a list of my favorites:

[image error]
Cinderella pre-makeover

Cinderella: The original housemaid heroine who has launched a thousand variations on the plot of her story.

Pamela: Another classic housemaid heroine. She nobly resists ravishment by the Lord of the Manor until, inspired by her virtue, he reforms and marries her. Published in 1740, it is one of the early runaway bestsellers, even spawning hysterical imitations and satires like Shamela (in which the maid pretends to be virtuous, marries the Lord of the Manor for his money and carries on an affair with the parson. Naturally. As one does.)

An Offer From A Gentleman: Julia Quinn's delightful take on the Cinderalla story featuring one of the beloved Bridgerton blokes.

The Tattooed Duke:  Yeah, I'm plugging my own book. The husband likes to think all my books are about him. For example, The Tattooed Duke features a hero who sails around the world (The Husband has done just that) and the woman who cleans for him and who is also a writer (Me, grumbling).

Farm boy! Fetch me that pitcher!

The Runaway Duke: For once it's the hero who is workin' it in this novel by Julie Anne Long. Of course, he's not actually a footman, but a duke in disguise. Naturally

The Princess Bride: Does it get any better than "Farm Boy" and "As you wish"? Methinks not. And you know how it's the greatest movie of all time? Well, the book is even better.

Can you think of any other stories featuring heroes and heroines as household helpers? 

Choose Your Own Romance!

[image error]

Hmmm...what to write next?

Dear readers,

Can I interest you in a story telling experiment? I'll provide a chapter of an original never-before-published story each week if you help determine the course of the story. Just read. Enjoy. Vote on what happens next. Choose your own romance adventure!

Our heroine shall be Lady Charlotte Brandon who devoted readers will remember from her scene-stealing antics in A Groom Of One's Own and other Writing Girl books.

 

~Chapter One~

 

Lady Charlotte Brandon was Trouble and no one knew that better than the Right Honorable Jameson Archer-Rhodes. Born just a few years apart and raised on neighboring estates James knew her—and her antics—very well. No one was more amused by them than he. Highlights on the long list of "Lady Charlotte's Disasters" included (in his opinion):

The occasion in which she replaced all the sugar with salt at a house party hosted by her mother, the duchess of Hamilton and Brandon. Charlotte had been seven and blamed the incident on her wicked imaginary friend, Millicent Strange, who was frequently guilty of all manner of horrible acts.
The occasion in which she'd been sent home from Lady Penelope's Finishing School for Young Ladies for "disappearing" all the embroidery supplies. She took full responsibility in a "your welcome" letter to her fellow students and faculty. To this day, she never revealed where the supplies had gone.
The occasion in which, when called upon to sing at Lady Strathmore's musical, she sang bawdy, obscene songs—in French. It was a verse or two before anyone caught on. And when they did….

James shook his head, grinning at the recollection. One thing could be said for Lady Charlotte: she was never boring. Maddening, yes. Terrifying, indeed. Boring, never.

When he spied her at the Lady Winterbottom's Ball with a wicked grin on her face, he knew she entertained some sort of dangerous thought. Even after years away, he could tell.  James threaded his way through the crowds to discover what madness she was up to.

Her face brightened into a happy smile when she saw him.

"Good evening, Lady Charlotte. You are grinning wickedly. I confess I am terrified, but intrigued," James said, as if he'd seen her this afternoon, when in fact he'd been abroad for the past four years.

"Well hello, James. Lovely to see you after all this time," she replied easily. "I quite feared you perished on the continent. Drowned in a Venetian canal, suffocated in a brothel, or tumbled from the Leaning Tower of Pisa."

"So you are smiling because I have returned safe and sound, only to find myself in the treacherous ballrooms of London's haute ton."

"Yes, that. And…" Charlotte conceded and then she leaned in close to him. Being a man, he glanced down at her bodice. Charlotte had changed since he saw her last, he noticed. "…The Tattooed Duke is here!"

"The Tattooed Duke?"

"I see you are very newly returned if you don't know. He's back after ten years abroad and reportedly covered in tattoos. I am grinning wickedly because, like the rest of the people here, I am imagining him in a state of undress."

James coughed. Shocked. She smiled, that wicked Mona Lisa smile of hers, and nodded at one barbaric looking gentleman in particular, who seemed to be sparring with a woman in a crimson dress.

"Lady Charlotte, I am appalled. I knew you had a mind prone to devious and scandalous thoughts but…" James said, his voice trailing off. When he'd left, Charlotte hadn't yet made her debut. She'd been a schoolgirl and now…she was no longer a schoolgirl. That much was plain.

"James, I did not expect you to return from the Continent such a prude. If that is the case, you clearly did not stay long enough," she lectured.

"Lady Charlotte, even you have no idea," he murmured. He almost crowed in triumph when he saw her blush. Why it mattered that he made her blush, he knew not.

"What brings you back to London?" she inquired. "At long last, I might add. Most gentlemen's grand tours last only for a year and you've been gone for four at least."

"Did you miss me?" He asked, with a rakish grin.  Charlotte rolled her eyes.

"You presume too much. I heard rumors about you, James. Is it true you have returned to find a wife?"

"If I said yes?"

"Rather dull of you, James. But never fear, I shall help you," she rested her hand on his arm affectionately. His heart raced. Her "help" would certainly lead to new additions on the list of "Lady Charlotte's Epic Disasters."

"That is precisely what I'm afraid of," he replied.

"So the rumors are true? You can confide in me, James." Charlotte said this in such a smooth voice, with such a tempting smile that his lips parted as if to tell her the truth…against all logic and reason. One did NOT confide in her.  And yet…

 

Should the rumors be true? Dear readers, take your pick from the options below, and I'll write the next installment accordingly!   

 

            ~ The rumors are true! He's seeking a wife. Charlotte, of course, shall play matchmaker. Whether he wants her to or not.

            ~ The rumors are ruse! He's really on a secret spy mission. Charlotte, of course, will assist him. Whether he wants her to or not.

 

True heroines are informed and take action

Confused about SOPA and PIPA? Me too. I thought this video explained what was at stake:

PROTECT IP / SOPA Breaks The Internet from Fight for the Future on Vimeo.

This Huffington Post article explains the political drama surrounding the issue.

Let's not break the internet. Sign the petition opposing SOPA and PIPA.

Celeb Gossip Quiz Answers!

Ok, stop holding your breath: here are the answers! This month's prize is a signed coverflat of The Tattooed Duke and it goes to…..Morgan! Email me with your address!

[image error]

1. Congrats! Beyonce and Jay-Z had their baby. What's her name?

Blue Ivy Carter 

2. A Maternity-Ward scandal ensued. What's up?

Team Beyonce-Z took over the maternity ward, possibly blocking other parents access to their kids, covering security cameras and generally causing a ruckus. Oh, and pay a 1.3 million bucks to upgrade a wing of the hospital.  

 

 [image error]

3. What is her exciting news?

She's engaged to art consultant BF Will Kopleman! Congrats

4. She starred in the movie  Never Been ______Kissed_________.

 

[image error] 

 

5. JT popped the question! Where did he do it? City and State please!

 Jackson Hole, Wyoming

6. Jessica recently appeared in which holiday themed ensemble movie?

New Years Eve 

Celeb Gossip Quiz!

Have you been reading your tabloids? I do hope so! Post your answers in the comments below and I'll randomly select a winner from the entries with perfect scores. Deadline: midnight tonight! The prize: A signed coverflat of The Tattooed Duke! Have fun, kittens!

[image error]

1. Congrats! Beyonce and Jay-Z had their baby. What's her name?

 

2. A Maternity-Ward scandal ensued. What's up?

 

 [image error]

3. What is her exciting news?

4. She starred in the movie  Never Been __________________.

 

[image error] 

 

5. JT popped the question! Where did he do it? City and State please!

 

6. Jessica recently appeared in which holiday themed ensemble movie?

 

Heroine Skillz: Embroidery

Hyacinth stabbed her needle into the fabric with perhaps a touch more vigor than was necessary, then looked down at her handiwork with a bit of a snarl. She was an abysmal needlewoman. She'd never had the patience or the eye for detail that it required, but she always kept an embroidery hoop going in the drawing room. One never knew when one would need it to provide an acceptable distraction from conversation.

            –It's In His Kiss, Julia Quinn

Embroidery seemed like a nice, relaxing heroine-esque activity to pursue, at least while it's still too cold to learn side-saddle. I thought it would be easy. I was wrong! WRONG!

[image error]

All my "ingredients" before I begin.

Thus far, my attempt at embroidery has been marked by a series of disasters and some personal revelations. For example, I have confirmed that I am the sort of person who rushes headlong into a project, skipping small boring (but essential) steps in order to get to the fun part. I then find myself in some horrible fix, but too far to turn back. Yet I am determined to carry on in spite of the following disasters:

Disaster #1: I began as one does these days: by ordering a kit from the internet with everything I would need to make a nice little sampler. It didn't come with a hoop, though. Where does one by an embroidery hoop in Manhattan? I have no idea. I'll do without one!

Disaster #2 The instructions lost me at "iron the fabric" which is step number one. I do not, as a rule, iron. I moved onto the next dilemma.

Disaster #3 The pattern was on a sheet of paper, not the fabric I was to embroider. I had hoped for some "stitch by number" situation. My solution: trace the patter onto the fabric. My advice: tape down the paper first, and then tape the fabric on top so they stay in place. I did not do this. Mine shifted. My tracings are horrible. But they'll have to do.

[image error]

Making progress every day!

Disaster #4 Threading the needle. This takes ages, especially with the six-strand embroidery thread. Finally, success! Then I read the instructions and see that I'm only to use two strands. Sigh. Try again. Knots ensue. Note to self: read instructions first.

Four disasters, at least, at not a stitch has been made! But I am lured by the promise of a relaxing activity (thank you for the encouragement facebook friends!).

But finally, I am seated on the couch with a threaded needle and an outline to trace. I even have a cup of tea by my side (which I did not spill, thank you very much!). I realize that my pencil lines will probably show through the stitches. I wish I had an embroidery hoop. I definitely should have ironed the fabric. But still, the act of stitching is rather peaceful.

Have you tried embroidery? Would you like to? 

Any advice for the newbies?