Joseph Mallozzi's Blog, page 542

April 6, 2011: I'm back in! Silly dog outfits! Splendido! Mailbag!

Success!  I finally have access to my yahoo email!  And it only took me an entire afternoon and approximately one hundred letter and number combinations to get it!

Let's celebrate with a pic of my mother's dog in silly outfits!

My other objected not so much to the fact they looked silly, but the fact that they looked like they were wearing pyjamas.  So she made my sister return the outfits.  If you ask me, I think they look like they're prepping to perform surgery.

Last night, I hit what was my favorite restaurant the last time I was in town: Splendido…

The double amuse bouche: carrot and cumin on the top, and carrot and orange on the bottom. Interesting.

The high-point of the night were the first round of appetizers: a) a delicious Shalom Farm Red Deer Tartar with pistachio, sorrel, and grilled bread, and b) the house charcuterie platter that included, among other things, a perfect terrine of foie gras as well as sweet and savory boudin noir with whipped pork fat.

That's the whipped pork fat on the left. Tasty, tasty whipped pork fat. Light yet heavy.

For round #2, we split two pasta plates: a) a good venison ravioli and and even better b) tagliatelle with Quebec rabbit, pancetta, and parsley.

For our mains, the ladies went with the butter poached lobster while I opted for the Yorkshire Pork Tenderloin with sultana raisin and pork sausage, and sage and walnut bread & butter pudding.  All very good but I was already slowing down.  So much so, in fact, that I only ordered two desserts: the Niagara Spy Apple and Saskatoon Berry Cobbler with vanilla bean ice cream and creme anglaise, and the dark chocolate and mascarpone parfait with chocolate sorbet and espresso anglaise.  Nothing to complain about but, ultimately, nothing to really love either.

Tomorrow, it's back to the office to discuss oautlines and one-pagers.  We've got scripts for episodes 1 and 2, and stories for episodes #3-8.  Four more to go and we'll have our first season mapped out.  After that's done, all that will be left to do is prep and produce season one.  Smoooooth sailing!

Mailbag:

Michael writes: "1) Was there any consideration for Mr. Woolsey or Ambassador Ovirda to mention Dr. McKay's failure with Project Arcturus in SGA, during the meeting?

2) Telford took two SG-units with him on the Langara mission. Were they specific ones like SG-3 or SG-5?

3) That was really cool to hear a little of the SGA theme when McKay walks in. Who's idea was it?

4) Was it ever planned to include something like a brief one sentence 'update' on the status of Atlantis?"

Answers: 1) There was not.  While interesting, it wouldn't have added anything to the scene and, quite the episode, would have only confused the issue for viewers unfamiliar with SGA.

2) To the best of my knowledge, they weren't.

3) That would have been the magical Joel Goldsmith, expert musicsmith.

4) Nope.  We were keeping it purposely vague in order to keep our options open for any potential movies.

Lou Zucaro writes: "Joe, if you do want to use that domain I got, you can get my e-mail address from your blog."

Answer: Will do.  Thanks, Lou.

Ulrike Tannenberg writes: "But I did not quite get, whether it would be possible to retrieve Ginn and Perry or not."

Answer: It was kept vague, however, there were plans for a cool early season 3 story involving Ginn that would have totally changed shipboard dynamics for many of our characters.  Remind me to tell you about it sometime.

Ulrike Tannenberg also writes: "About making an amalgam movie of all 3 Stargate incarnations – please don't. I know many people here are fans of SG1 and SGA so I have been holding back with my opinion on those – at least mostly. Just don't. That would be like mixing night and day – it will not work out."

Answer: Well, in your opinion, did it work out in Seizure?  Ultimately, it would really depend on the characters crossing over.

Simon writes: "1) Can you dedicate a blog post to your Transporter: The Series show? IE going into further detail without giving too much away ect

2) Do you have an interested network? If not then may I suggest going to the USA network as it would fit in nicely with their other shows, Burn Notice (You ever watch it?) etc.

3) Mike Dopud being considered for the lead?

4) Speaking of SGU, any word from Brad about the movie(s)?"

Answer: 1) Sure, eventually.  Right now, the series is in the early prep stages and we're still in the process of hammering out stories and assembling our team.

2) We already have an American broadcaster and it is a perfect fit for this high-octane, sexy, action-adventure series!

3) We're presently auditioning for several roles and I have asked to see Mike.

4) Still no word.  Sorry.

chevron7 writes: "How's Jelly doing with the colder weather?"

Answer: She's a shiverer.  I carry her out, set her own, wait for her to do her business, then scoop her up and head inside.

hal ehlrich writes: "Well I am crossing my fingers that a movie ends up coming out.  Do you have any timeframe when they might be letting us know if and when it may happen?"

Answer: I don't and I honestly feel it has to be sooner than later if we want to take advantage of actor availability.

N writes: "Since people's consciousness can be uploaded and downloaded to and from the chair would it be possible to change the person's code and their personalities while they are in Destiny's mainframe?"

Answer: With the proper knowledge of how to go about "changing the respective programs" it might theoretically be possible to excise certain memories, even personality subroutines which would, in effect, be the equivalent of brain surgery.  It would be unpredictable, however, and I wouldn't recommend it.

Randomness writes: "Sorry Joe but I disagree about your comments about the ratings not effecting the movie."

Answer: Disagree with me all you want.  Regardless of whether this movie gets made or not, at the end of the day I'm someone who has worked on the franchise for over a decade and have access to certain information like, for instance, what variables are being considered in the decision-making process, and what variables aren't (ie. ratings).

Randomness also writes: "…and Syfy on the verge of pulling the show off the air like they did with Caprica…"

Answer: Really?  What's the source of your information?  Or is this merely an assumption on your part?

Randomness also writes: "Speaking of which, I really can't understand why you, Paul, Carl etc have all joined the Transporter, all of you including Brad should of done a 4th Stargate series."

Answer: Our focus was on SGU.  Our plan was to continue the series, not set up a back-up spin-off.  Rob left the franchise to pursue other projects.  Paul and I said that if and when SGU ended, we would move on as well.  Brad, who co-created all three shows and has been with the franchise longer than anyone, is looking to provide SGU fans with a satisfactory conclusion to the story of Destiny's mission.

Thornyrose writes: "So, you WILL tell us who the kind stranger/familiar face is when you eventually identify him is, won't you?"

Answer: Sure, but it could be months, perhaps years, before I can place the face.

chevron7 writes: "Could you please do me a favour and close the ankle bracket after blockquote in the previous comment."

Answer: The what in the what now?

April 5, 2011: Joe's School of Language!

I was in the kitchen, packing away the dog food, when I heard Akemi, in the next room, drop three successive f-bombs as she struggled with her laptop.  Sweet, polite, demure, soft-spoken Akemi!  "Where did you learn that?"I asked/admonished.

"Joe's school of language,"she informed me without missing a beat.  And then, redirecting her attention back to the laptop: "Jesus Crisis!".

So, okay, I'll admit I'm not a great role model.  Especially when I'm behind the wheel.  In traffic.  Late for appointment.

Still, Akemi's outburst was a unique experience – and, frankly, perfectly acceptable given the circumstances.  It was ticking close to 1:00 a.m. and we'd spent the last three hours moving across the street and one block over to our new digs.  We were exhausted.  And by the time we crawled into bed, it was almost 2:00.

I figured I'd be able to sleep in.  The dogs, on the other hand, figured otherwise.  And so, at 8:00 a.m. this morning, I was heading out with Bubba and Lulu for their first walk of the day.  It wasn't a great start to the day.  As I was stepping off the elevator, I glanced down and noticed Lulu had vomited.  In a matter of seconds, I was multi-tasking: holding onto the dogs, fishing out my doggy bag, holding the elevator door open, and apologizing profusely to the gentleman about to step inside.  He smiled and offered to hold on to the dogs for me while I cleaned up the mess and then, handing the leashes back, offered a "I've got one of my own." before heading into and up.  The interesting thing about this incident was not so much the dog vomit or the kindness of this stranger but the fact that I knew the guy.  Well, not exactly.  I mean, he looked incredibly familiar.  I've seen him somewhere – probably on television – but I couldn't place the face.  Apparently, the hotel/residence we just moved into is quite popular with productions.  I passed a couple of Warehouse 13 cast members on my way to the park.

I finally got around to doing a work-out, my first in over two weeks.  I ran for thirty minutes, hit the weights for another twenty, then celebrated by visiting St. Lawrence Market and enjoying a highly-recommended Mustachio veal and eggplant sandwich…

The verdict?  Two huge thumbs up.  If there's one thing I can say about Toronto, it's that I WON'T be going hungry here.

Going anywhere but down.

On the way back from the market, we stopped off to pick up dog food and met this sweetheart: Cookie.

Cookie models one of the shop's 30% off sweaters.

While we're on the subject of dressed-up pugs, check out Portia, an equally fashionable pug.

Thanks to everyone who weighed in with their helpful suggestions for dealing with my lost password problem.  There are a lot of very smart people out there. Which begs the question: What are they doing reading this blog when they could be out there inventing something?

Worked on the outline today.  One more scene to go and I'm done.  I'd have completed it had I not gotten distracted by the character breakdowns and audition sides I had to put together for Dieter, Olivia, Sergei, and Nicolai.  Well, in truth, the outline won't truly be complete until I've taken that tour of Casa Loma this Friday.

Today's entry is dedicated to Arctic Goddess.  Good luck on your surgery!

Mailbag:

Michael writes: "We need some photos of the dogs in the new place."

Answer:

Bailey writes: "If you do another mailbag, did you even consider mentioning Jonas in tonight's SGU ep?"

Answer: Yes, in fact I gave a note at the script stage that, at the very least, some mention should be made about the fact that Jonas Quinn had retired from public office.  Don't know what happened but it obviously didn't make it onscreen.

Lou Zucaro writes: "But why not just buy a domain and have e-mail at your own domain? It's not very expensive. I own a hosting company and could help with it if you so desired. I'm assuming you own either (or both) mallozzi.com and josephmallozzi.com, but if not, I registered joemallozzi.com for you in case you want it (just tell me)."

Answer: Very kind of you, Lou.  I may take you up on this once things settle down here.

Jason writes: "I would contact yahoo technical support/customer service and explain the situation, and offer to verify who you are using the yahoo email account. They can email your yahoo account some unique phrase or something, and you can read it back from the phone."

Answer: Hey, Jason, thanks for this.  May use this as a last resort.

majorsal writes: "what about an amalgamation of the three series into one stargate movie?"

Answer: That was one of the ideas floated at one point.

Randomness writes: "For anyone thinking SGU will get a movie, see the most recent ratings."

Answer: Said it before and I'll say it again – the ratings will not impact a decision on the movie.

April 4, 2011: My spot is located so deep in the bowels of the parkade that I'm parking between the falsifiers and the sowers of discord.

Moved into the new place this evening and, while it's an improvement in many ways (includes work-out room, working tea kettle, oven mitts!), it's also has it's share of problems.  The air circulation is poor, there's no main floor closet, and my spot is located so deep in the bowels of the parkade that I'm parking between the falsifiers and the sowers of discord. Still, it's well-located next to a quaint little park where, today, the dogs enjoyed a late afternoon stroll amid the singing birds, the burgeoning bushes, and the homeless man relieving himself on a nearby tree.  Ah, city life.

Anyway, this was in marked contrast to last night's April showers -

And by "showers" I mean "snow".

Yesterday, we checked out three local comic book shops.  I couldn't help but notice that the friendliness of the staff is inversely proportional to the size of the store.  Silver Snail Comics was by far the most impressive.  There, I purchased a Dr. Octopus statue from a guy who seemed unusually irritated by the prospect of having to pack away an assortment of faux metal tentacles.  Over at 1000000 Comix, where I purchased an Ultron statue, the guys were polite and helpful. I didn't buy anything at Hairy Tarantula (a tight space tucked away at the top of a sketchy-looking staircase), but was so charmed by the ebullient Irish guy at the cash that I vowed I'd be back for all my trade paperback needs.  And volume 3 of Death Note for Akemi.

We also checked out Sanko, a Japanese konbiniya on Queen Street West, where Akemi went absolutely nuts, picking up a rice cooker, green tea and sesame cookies, sake kasu, yuzu, nori, sakura-shaped cookie cutters, enoki mushrooms, and ramen.  She suggested we also pick up some rice bowls, choosing a beautiful blue fish-themed handpainted wonder.  For my part, I went with this -

Why, yes, now that you mention it, it IS pink.  But look at the cuuute cat!

As I settle in, I'm starting to do a little more cooking.  Last night, it was Chicken Piccata -

Want to know the secret to juicy, perfectly cooked chicken breasts?  Okay, I'll tell you.  Ready?  Simmer the meat over low heat.  Yep, that simple.  Slice your chicken breast into two thinner slices.  Pour some chicken broth in a pan.  Toss in some rosemary, thyme, a couple of bay leafs, two cloves of garlic, and a chopped shallot, season with salt and pepper, then bring to a boil.  Once it starts bubbling, bring it down to a low simmer, then lower your chicken breasts into the savory stock.  Make sure the meat is completely covered.  Leave it to slow simmer until it loses all traces of surface pinkness, then remove from the pan and season with salt, paprika, oregano or dredge in a seasoned flour mixture.  Heat some olive oil in a pan over medium-high heat.  Re-dredge the chicken in the flour mixture (if that's the way you're going), then sear the meat, about a minute a side.  Remove the meat, add another tablespoon of olive oil, add some chopped garlic, and sautee over medium heat.  Then, add a cup of white wine (capers, lemon juice, balsamic vinegar, or whatever else strikes your fancy), reduce by half, add the chicken back into the pan and let it cook for another minute.  Take it off the heat, toss in a tablespoon of butter, and baste the meat with melted butter-white wine reduction.  Plate and serve.

Let me know how it turns out for you.

Finally – a couple of weeks ago, I found out that yet another one of my friends had had their yahoo account hacked.  Figuring my four letter password made me a perfect target, I made it a point to change it to something a lot more complicated.  So complicated, in fact, that when I went to check my email this morning and discovered I'd been logged out, I couldn't remember what it was.  After many failed attempts, I clicked on the "I'm too stupid too remember my password" button which directed me to the "Change your password, you idiot" option.  Alas, the back-up email I provided two years ago when I first created my yahoo account is now defunct so I had to go the "Answer the personal questions" portion of the show.  I got the first one but then, when it came to the second one, it told my my answer was incorrect even though I know for a fact that my favorite food when I was a kid WAS NUTELLA!  "Smoked oysters?"offered Paul helpfully.  I tried.  It didn't work.  Neither did powdered doughnuts with milk, smoked meat, or duck a l'orange (actually, my late father's favorite).  And then yahoo informed me that I was locked out and wouldn't be able to attempt to access my account for another 12 hours.  Ironically, I AM able to access my yahoo email on my iPhone, but am unable to access my account (which would allow me to change my password and solve the problem).  Suggestions?  Besides subscribe to mobileme?

Finally, allow me to leave you with THIS awesome cat massage video.  You're welcome:

 

April 3, 2011: On the move! A long overdue mailbag!

Well, we've found a new place.  And it's only one block over.  And one floor up from where my writing/producing partner, Paul, is living (His response when I told him: "I'm afraid I'm going to have to complain, buddy.  I don't want people with multiple dogs living in my building.").  It has a fitness room, a swimming pool, and a deck I'll never ever step out onto.  We move in tomorrow night!  Please leave your apartment-warming gifts in the main lobby with the concierge. Thanks.

I'm off to work on an outline.  Here, entertain yourselves with a long overdue mailbag…

Angelus writes: "You mean the "super secret project" A.K.A "Transporter TV Show" of which everyone has been aware for the past couple of months? That super secret project?"

Answer: Yes, that one.  Shhhhh.

cherluvya writes: "Now…Carl isn't leaving LEAVING is he? Just for the writing period…right?"

Answer: Alas, Carl is just freelancing on the show.  He's going away to work on his script and will be back sometime in the near future to break his second episode.  :( As Paul pointed out last night, even though we've known Carl longer, Alexander will probably miss him the most.  Those two really hit it off.  They were beste of freundes.

irish pete writes: "Will this new series have as much action as human target?"

Answer: That's a pretty safe bet.

David J writes: "has Brad and co made any new progress then last you said they had made progress (earlier last month) not that you could tell us much but has there been ANY moves forward for SGU?"

Answer: Last I heard (on Friday) there was some movement but, curiously, it was neither forward nor backward but sideways.  Strange but true.

DP writes: "Questions about the new series: 1. What does the new series have in common with Stargate?"

Answer: Action, adventure, engaging characters, interesting relationships, a sense of fun, and humor.

"2. What does the new series have in common with the Xbox game Simpson's Road Rage?"

Answer: Fast-paced four-wheel action.  And colorful characters.

"3. What are some locales we'll see in the new series?"

Answer: The series will have a certain European flair.

"4. Who is your favorite character?"

Answer: Right now, I'm loving them all – however, I do hold a special affinity for our protagonist, Frank.

"5. What are some of the main character's quirks or, oh, let's say, rules that govern his/her behavior?"

Answer: Oh, he's got a few.  He's quite regimented that way.

"6. What has the main character been doing since the last movie?"

Answer: Ah, you're assuming the series picks up where the last movie left off.  Not quite.

"7. What will the main character be doing in the pilot that we've seen him/her do before?"

Answer: His job.

"8. What does the main character do for a living?"

Answer: Helps people in need.  For a price.  So long as their need requires getting something from point A to point B.

"9. Does the main character have any special skills?"

Answer: Oh, plenty.  Don't get on his bad side or you'll experience them firsthand.

"10. Is the main character an upstanding, square-jawed hero?"

Answer: Definitely not.

"11. What does the main character have in common with you?"

Answer: He's not an upstanding, square-jawed hero.  Also, we both drive Audi's.

"12. Does the main character have any pets?"

Answer: Nope.  Maybe a couple of pugs in season 2?

dasNdanger writes: "Since it's fresh on my mind – any news on the comic book front?"

Answer: We're looking at an early 2012 release.

Lou Zucaro writes: "1) How many black Audis does the production have, and are they owned / leased / fake?"

Answer: We're still in early prep and have yet to close the deal on the cars.  Once ours, they will need to be modified in order to pull off some of the ambitious/awesome stunts we're scripting.

2) The new A8 is pretty f'ing phenomenal…is that what we're going to see on-screen?

Answer: That's the plan.

3) Did you open the package?

Answer: I'm incredibly curious and impatient so, yes, I couldn't resist and opened the package.  It contained gummi bears and a coupon for a free tractor trailer ride at the local county fair.

Andrea-Fonville White writes: "Have you thought of casting any one from Stargate?"

Answer: I've certainly suggested some former Stargate vets as we gear up for auditions.

Thornyrose writes: "So, as an executive producer, will you have to fly over the pond for the European side of the production? If so, how often?"

Answer: That task would fall to someone else.  Chances are I'll probably be quite busy on this side of the pond.  Still, if it was necessary, I do speak French and do love French food…

Sparrow_hawk writes: "Did I miss some posts or haven't we gotten any Q&A responses from the authors on the recent books?"

Answer: Nope, 'tis true.  We're awaiting Q&A responses from our last three guest authors.  In all fairness, I told them not to rush and to turn their answers around at their earliest convenience.

Sean D. writes: "What would you say are some key similarities and differences, so far, in your experience with the new franchise as compared to the Stargate franchise?"

Answer: When Paul and I joined the Stargate franchise, the production was a well-oiled machine that had been humming along for three years.  All the major start-up issues had been addressed and it was a simple matter of stepping aboard and enjoying the ride.  In the case of this new series, we're essentially building the foundation for what will hopefully be a nice long run.  Like Stargate, the people we're working with are terrific, which is key.

Sean D. writes: "How does the restaurant scene in the Toronto area compare to that of the Vancouver area?"

Answer: Sushi aside (I've already resigned myself to the fact that I can give up any hope of enjoying a Japanese meal for the duration of my Toronto stay), pretty good.  I hit some pretty fine restaurants on my initial trip here (Nota Bene, George, Splendido) and discovered some very good casual eateries on this swing.

KEK writes: "Is there any way you could push for MGM to commission a novelization of your script that you and the other writers would consider canon?"

Answer: Alas, it's out of my hands.  For what it's worth, I think it's a terrific idea.

pennlynn writes: "How has your stress level been??"

Answer: 95% of my stress revolves around dog issues (their safety, their health, the fact that they're well taken care of).  I can pretty much roll with whatever punches life throws at me on all other fronts.

Ivon Bartok writes: "Stop talking shit about Toronto, Mallozzi…"

Answer: A Vancouverite such as yourself wouldn't understand…

Stu writes: "Come on, there are douchebags in every major city, small town, hamlet, and outpost in the entire world. Don't shit on an entire city because of one a-hole. [...] Meh, you just lost a reader."

Answer: What are you, the mayor of Toronto?  Look, I'd love nothing better than to say the city is beautiful, the traffic is awesome, the people are friendly and, up until recently, the weather has been delightful – but I can't.  Hopefully, in time, I will.  Still, I'm sorry if I offended you.

And your Maple Leafs suck.

Ulrike Tannenberg writes: "Someone commented a few days ago that the chances for a 3.season are zero (sad, but I knew that) and the chances for a movie are almost zero (that was new to me and totally shocked me, as it is/was something of a last hope). So the question is: is it true – almost no chance for a SGU-movie?"

Answer: Someone commented?  Was this someone an official spokesperson for MGM?  If so, then they would know.  If, on the other hand, that someone was some nameless noob on a discussion forum, then they don't know anymore than hou do.  A third season of SGU is not in the cards, but a movie is still a possibility.

paloosa writes: "1) Since the show is in early pre-production, will it be airing in 2012?"

Answer: Yes, the plan is to premiere in early 2012.

"2) Any chance for casting any Stargate actors?"

Answer: I did make some requests for people I wanted to see audition.

"3) Is this strictly a Canadian production, or will it include American or European actors, writers and directors?"

Answer: It'll be a melting pot of talent in front of and behind the camera.

"4) Will there be less studio or network involvement in the creative decisions than you were subjected to with Syfy?"

Answer: No, I'm sure the networks will be equally involved on the creative front.  Their first round of notes were quite good.

 

April 2, 2011: Hey, maybe Toronto isn't so bad after all. I mean, I could really – no, wait. I stand corrected. It IS so bad after all.

Today, the sun came up, the temperature rose and, for the very first time, I thought there was a chance I could actually starting liking Toronto.  Following my first early morning workout in ages, I took the dogs for a stroll, showered up, dressed, then headed out to explore the city.  We drove around, picked up some soaps and shampoos at Lush, a blender at Future Shop, some awesome comic-related office adornments at Silver Snail Comics, and an eviction notice.  We also had some terrible Italian food and -

What?

What did I say?

I said I picked up some comic-related office adornments at Silver Snail Comics.  Check 'em out:

The Deadpool comes with a veritable arsenal of weapons including -

What?  Oh.  AFTER that?

Yes, we were driving back from playing tourist when I received a call from my realtor.  Apparently, someone lodged a formal complaint about my dogs with the strata of the building we're staying in and we need to vacate the premises immediately.  That or, presumably, put two of the dogs down.  Not really sure what the issue is as the pooches are neither noisy nor aggressive and spend most of their time simply lazing about, but clearly someone is a stickler for rules.  That and a giant douchebag.  For my part, I greeted the news with a resounding "Meh".  The place is dated, a bit of a dump, not particularly well-located for those early morning dog walks, and the washing machine in the apartment caps each cycle with a thunderous KAGLANG!  This was only a temporary stay I was willing to suffer through until I could find something half-ass or better with an actual yard that wouldn't require me to run an hour-long gauntlet of traffic. Besides, I'd made it perfectly clear prior to my T.O. arrival, that I would require a place that was okay with the dogs.  All four of them.  So, with all due respect and in the words of my buddy Bruce: "F 'em.".  Akemi, however, didn't take the news as well.  Sensitive as she is, the poor gal was almost in tears at the prospect of someone snitching on the dogs.

"Why so mean?"she asked, downcast.

"Because,"I informed her matter-of-factly, "it's Toronto."

Anyway, we returned home, dropped off our purchases, picked up the dogs – all four of 'em – and headed over to Fondy's place to pick up Jelly's meds, some red velvet cake, and find out if Lulu would hit it off with Brie and Stewie…

 

Maximus and Jelly share a seatbelt enroute.

Bubba and Lulu enjoying the ride.

 

Lulu is thrilled to see Fondy again.





While Akemi falls in love with Stewie.





Lulu gets checked out.





Stewie and Lulu




 

 



Brie and Stewie in a rare moment of calm.

Brie

Lulu: "Hey there, buddy." Stewie: "Who you callin' buddy?"





Fondy made a red velvet cake that was so good Akemi skipped dinner to eat it.

Tonight, I attempt to shift focus to the outline.  Tomorrow, was planning to take a tour of a Toronto landmark we'll be using as a possible location for my episode but may stick around the home front lest the strata militia kick in the door and attempt to confiscate my dogs.

Instead, I'll try to hit the mailbag.

April 1, 2011: Sore knees! Carl's last day! m:brgr!

Believe it or not, the dogs are actually even more freaked out and skittish about this move to Toronto than I am.  As a result, in an effort to reassure them and ease the transition, I've taken to sleeping with the pack on the apartment's pull-out bed.  It's a lot less roomy than my king-size bed back in Vancouver and certainly a lot less comfortable.  For the first two mornings, I woke up with sore knees.  Sore knees?!  WTF?!  Then, this morning, when I woke up, my left hand was so stiff I could barely make a fist.  [insert crude Carl Binder crack here].

Today, we finally broke my second episode in the writers' room.  While the other stories averaged about two and a half days to break, mine took only half a day.  On the upside, we wrapped it up in record time.  On the downside, unlike all of the other stories, there's not much in the way of details concerning the action sequences.  I suppose it'll all become clear to me this weekend after some careful thought and several drinks.

Anyway, consider the following diagram your first spoiler of the new series…

Keep it under your hats.

Today was Carl's last day and what better way to commemorate the solemn event than with burgers and skillet cookies with ice cream?  And so, tonight, we all headed out (in Akemi and my case, back) to m: brgr.

Alex and his better half, Sarah





My kobe beef burger with caramelized onions porcini mushrooms, black truffle carpaccio, and fig jam.





Carl asks "What's with the milkshake in the woman's belly?"





Training my hipstamatic on Alex.





In honor of his belated birthday, Alex was presented with a skillet cookie and sparkler – that fizzled out before the dish even hit the table.  A bad omen, noted Paul.





This thingie came with the skillet cookie.  Hmmmmm.

In addition to fleshing out the various beats of my episode this weekend, I'll also need to run a couple of errands and pick up a few things.  It's amazing how you never know how much you really need something until you don't have it.  Like last night, for instance, after we finished roasting our dinner.  "The seabass is done!"I announced, throwing open the oven door.  "Where are the oven mitts?"  Where?   Well certainly not in this apartment.

Speaking of the apartment – Hey, anyone know how to remove scratches (aka dog claw marks) from a wooden door?  There must be a way, right?  If humanity found a way to make Chuck Cunningham, the Andorians, and Re'Tu Charlie disappear without a trace, surely we can find a way to do the same with door scratches, no?

March 31, 2011: The not-so-secret project may not be so secret for long!

If rumors are to be believed (and, really, why wouldn't you believe a rumor?),  i's are about to be dotted, t's stroked and, where necessary, certain vowels umlauted, graved, and aigued so that, by Monday, I'll finally be able to name the super-secret series I'm working on.  Well, it's super-secret only insofar as I'm calling it "super-secret" since, by now, most of you have already figured out the show.  What we know so far: it's based on an established film franchise, is a co-production that will be shooting in Toronto and Europe, will showcase colorful stunts and action sequences, involves a character named Frank and another named Tarconi, and features a black Audi.  And if you guessed Ulykken or Il Mio Miglor Nemico, I'm going to have to ask you to guess again.

Anyway, many of you are asking "Joe, why don't you just work from Vancouver?".  Well, the simple answer is "I can't.".  Paul and I will be Exec. Producing the series with Alexander (who has been creative point man on the project through it's lengthy development), something we'd be hard-pressed to accomplish from the other side of the country.

Alas, no movement on the accommodation front.  Looks like I'll be extending my stay in the apartment while I expand my search for a house.  On the bright side, it turns out my current locations isn't too bad.  I'm only a ten minute walk from Silver Snail Comics and a terrific burger joint I checked out last night with Akemi.  m: brgr first opened in Montreal a couple of years back and it immediately piqued my interest.  It's a place that the Carls and Alex's of the world can enjoy as much as I do because the burger building basics allow for everything from simple cheeseburgers to foie-gras topped kobe beef burgers.  For instance, last night, I went with with the brioche bun, kobe beef, caramelized onions, fig jam, porcini mushrooms, and black truffle carpaccio.  I expected it to be good but, holy smokes, it surpassed my lofty expectations.  It was THE BEST BURGER I've had in recent memory.  And when it came time to dessert -

 

House tiramisu





Deep dish chocolate chip cookie topped with not one but TWO scoops of vanilla ice cream. I couldn't stop eating and practically polished it off all by myself. Then glanced over and noticed a table of three girls sharing an order. The truth is, although I was stuffed, had the dessert been twice as big I probably still would have finished it.





Akemi reacts to my eating prowess.

Tomorrow is Carl's last day in town (until he returns to break another story) so we're sending him off in fine style: with schnitzel sandwiches from California Sandwiches and  a return trip to m: brgr for dinner.  Wish me luck!

March 30, 2011: They et green grapes. They all five got the howlin' skitters.

What a great start to my day.  I walked into the production offices this morning to discover THIS tasty-looking treat…

Named Dede. Who had a little surprise for me: an Irish Carbomb Cupcake. Bailey's Irish Cream frosting, chocolate and stout cake, and chocolate and Irish Whiskey ganache. The breakfast of champions!

Another day of spinning.  We're hoping to send everyone off with one story before we break to write.  We're averaging about two to two and a half days an episode meaning we'll be finishing up Alexander's story late tomorrow – leaving me Friday to spin, break, and board my episode.

The action sequences in this series are going to be a lot bigger, a lot more colorful, and a lot more complicated than your average show.  As a result, we've often found ourselves diagramming the choreography in order to explain who does what, where, and how.  Paul suggested we start using props – specifically, some models cars: an Audi, a couple of SUVs, and some sedans (and a red Porsche and beat up Volvo for episode 2).  Anyone know of a good model car shop in the Toronto area?  Alexander took Paul's suggestion to heart and brought in his own prop – one day late for the episode discussed – and proceeded to use it as a form of therapy throughout the breaking session…

I hadn't seen him this happy since that time we ate lunch at a diner.

Alexander, Executive Producer by day, fantasy chopper pilot by night.

In addition, to discussing stories, today's highlights also included some discussion on the etymology of the word "skitters".  Carl Binder, an apparent expert on the term, traces its roots back to John Steinbeck's The Grapes of Wrath.  To quote from the Nobel Prize Winner's most critically acclaimed work: "They et green grapes.  They all five got the howlin' skitters." And a late afternoon meeting with, oh, everyone in which we talked casting.  I am REALLY looking forward to checking out those audition streams.

Finally, while Jelly and Maximus lazed about the apartment today, Bubba and Lulu attending their first day at doggy daycare.  It wasn't St. Roch's School for Gifted Canines, but they seemed to enjoy themselves all the same as evidenced by the pics one of the owners sent my way…

March 29, 2011: Familiar faces and birthday dinner!

Today was Alexander's birthday.

The Birthday Boy

We celebrated in grand production style – with a morning director interview, some story spinning, casting discussions, and a rotisserie chicken lunch.  To top things off, we received a visit from a surprise guest…

Look who's in town. Why, it's former Stargate Visual Effects Supervisor Mark Savela!

Mark was in town on Echoes-related business.  "What is Echoes?"you're asking.  Why, it's the SF pilot he and a bunch of Stargate vets have been working on.  Read all about it here: http://www.redeyechicago.com/entertainment/tv/redeye-stargate-universe-vets-new-sci-fi-project-20110322,0,220274.story

Anyway, on his way to his Echoes-related business, he dropped by the production offices where we talked about projects, past, present and, hopefully, future.

And Mark wasn't the only familiar face we saw today.  Anyone remember this guy?

Why, yes.  It IS Alex Levine, former Stargate script coordinator, now a writer on Flashpoint.  He joined us (Rob, Carl, Paul, myself, and, of course, birthday boy Alexaner) for a very good dinner at Bymark Restaurant where I enjoyed a great butter-braised lobster poutine, oxtail risotto, gnocchi with buffalo ricotta, short ribs, bourbon chocolate cake, and rum and raisin cookie dough ice cream.  Alas, I forgot my camera in Vancouver so I had to make do with subpar cell phone pics.  This weekend, I'm picking up a new camera – among other necessities – after which this blog will return to its regularly scheduled programming.

I finally discovered the secret to a restful night's sleep: sleep on the pull-out couch with the dogs.

Alas, I forgot my power cord at work so I'm almost out of battery life.  Allow me to end today's entry with an excerpt from the email I received from my house-sitter, Lawren, who had his car broken into on Saturday (not in my neighborhood, I'd like to add).   Apparently, the thief made off with some valuables and parking change but, surprisingly, left a few items untouched.  According to Lawren:

"He felt the stack of quarters wasn't worth his time. Nor was my USB  stick, David Sedaris book or sunglasses. The sunglasses I admit are a unique

look and not everyone's style but WHO doesn't like David Sedaris?"

March 28, 2011: Toasty warm on your numbened fingers through the plastic of the poopy bag. Heavenly!

So, yesterday's dog transport went surprisingly smoothly.  My awesome dogs-sitter, Christine, was kind enough to offer me a lift to the airport.  Once there, I met up with Leah and, dog carriers in hand, we fairly breezed through check-in and security with minimal whining.  Bubba and Lulu were pretty good too.  With plenty of time before our 11:30 flight, we parked ourselves in front of Gate 145 and chatted away the time.  Until about 11:15 when Leah glanced down at her watch and noted it was kind of weird that, with fifteen minutes to go before our scheduled departure, we had yet to board.  I also found it odd that Gate 145 was sparsely attended – and by sparsely, I mean Leah and I were the only ones there.  Leah checked her ticket.  Sure enough, it said Gate 145.  I checked mine.  146!

Fortunately, we were able to stroll over and right onto the plane with moments to spare.  It was fortunate I wasn't a more interesting conversationalist because, if I had been, I'm sure Leah wouldn't have even realized the time!  Anyway, we slipped the dogs underneath the seats in front of us and they were amazingly well-behaved for the entire flight.  With the exception of the five minutes when the air hostess hunkered down to say hi.

The dream trip lasted for as long as it took us to disembark – at which point Bubb and Lulu started crying and scratching.  I've never heard Lulu make the sounds she made over the course of those unbearable twenty minutes.  She sounded downright indignant.

Leah prepares to climb onto the baggage conveyor in a bid to keep the dogs entertained. It was all fun and games - until she was claimed by a Malaysian businessman.

Once outside the terminal, I phoned up Fondy who was supposed to be giving me a lift – and nowhere in sight.

"Where are you?"she asked.

"Terminal one,"I informed her.

"Yeah, but where?  What section?  Check the number on the pole!"

"There is no number on the pole.  Just a letter.  A."

"What terminal are you at?!!"

I pushed my $2 baggage cart along, using my right hand to steady the two dog carriers on the pile of suitcases, my left hand clutching my cell phone, and approached an airport employee.  "What terminal is this?"I asked.  He informed me it was terminal 1.  "I'm at terminal one,"I repeated.

"But what section?"she asked, the frustration clearly mounting.  "What's the number on the pole?"

I checked.  "There is no number.  Just a letter.  C."

"Are you sure you're at terminal one?!!"

I forged ahead, stopped and asked an airport employee, considered resuming the roundabout conversation and then, thinking better of it, simply handed HIM the phone.  "He's at terminal one,"he informed her.  A beat.  "No, you're at terminal three.  Follow the signs to terminal one.  Your passenger will be in section E."

I thanked him and took back the phone, whereupon I was immediately reprimanded.  "You said section C!  You're in section E!"

I wanted to ask her what difference it made since she was at the wrong terminal anyway but, before I could protest, she clicked off.

Eventually, she found terminal one (as did Leah's sister who was also waiting for her at terminal three) and dropped me and the dogs (including Jelly and Maximus) off at the apartment where we settled down -

To an exhausting evening.

It was bitterly cold.  I took the dogs out in two's – Jelly and Maximus first, then Bubba and Lulu.  Lulu caught her foot under the automatic door and loosened a bloodcurdling shriek that startled the hell out of the heavy-set security guard sitting at the reception desk.  Then, this morning, jumped off the bed and injured her paw/leg.  She's been limping around all day.  Bubba, his anxiety quotient cranked up to eleven, screams (and I do mean SCREAMS) when he is left alone in the place.  Jelly, suffering through a bladder infection, was up at 4:30 a.m., crying, because she needed to go to the bathroom.  I ended up sleeping the last two hours until my 7:00 a.m. wake-up on the floor to comfort her.  Maximus, on the other hand, is his usual lazy old self.

This morning, it was another double round of walkies in the miserable Toronto cold.  Unlike Vancouver, the high point of the dog walks here in Toronto are the moments when you actually pick up the dog crap (toasty warm on your numbened fingers through the plastic of the poopy bag.  Heavenly!).  Then, I headed out early to check out another two daycares.  One was located on a sketchy-looking block, flanked by a tattoo parlor and a psychic; the other wasn't even open at 9:00 a.m. when I rolled by.

Back in the office, we started spinning another story, got to the end of the first act before I had to bow out to check out three more houses.  Desperation has set in and I've reached the point where I'll settle for pretty much anything.  Which is what I've done.  It's old, unfurnished, and the basement is creepy, but it'll do.  Until December anyway.  My offer goes in tomorrow.  If it's accepted, we move in this weekend.  If not, I'm going to make an offer on The Shining place (see March 25th entry, ed.).

P.S. I'm loving Tarconi!