Joseph Mallozzi's Blog, page 522

November 14, 2011: Recent Purchase! Dark Matter! Dogs! Alex and Sarah!

You'll never guess what I picked up today.

Uh, correct on the first guess.  How did you…?  Oh, right.  The photo.

Yes, I picked up the complete five volume collection of Bloom County. And, because it wasn't on the shelf, I had to special order a little something else.

Well, not so little.  It's, in the words of its creator: "an 18 pound hernia-giver".  Now I'll give you two hints as to what -

Oh.  The photo.  Right.

Anyway, yes.  It's funny but, even though I grew up with these comic strips, I hadn't given them a thought in years – until my recent blog post about them. And, suddenly, I'm looking forward to cracking open these collections open like a kid looks forward to his Christmas haul – especially if he asked Santa for the complete Bloom County and Far side collections.

This afternoon, finished up the second of my two interviews for my comic book series, Dark Matter – the first for Shaun Manning over at Comic Book Resources and the other for Chris Arrant at Newsarama. They were fun but tough.  Having worked in SF television long enough, I'm mindful of spoilers.  The trick, of course, is to tease potential readers by providing them with just enough information to whet their appetites, but not give too much away.  In the case of Dark Matter, however, this has proven particularly challenging because this series is driven by so many narrative twists, turns, and surprises that even the most seemingly straightforward of story elements can telegraph a future revelation.

Will let you know when the interviews are up.

Two days to Maximus's surgery and he seems fairly relaxed…

Just lazing around, not a care in the world.

The others seems equally unconcerned -

Finally, I received confirmation today  that Alexander and Sarah will, in fact, be coming to visit.  They arrive on Friday (but have given me no indication how long they'll be staying.  Might have to cancel my Christmas flight to Montreal just in case).  Anyway, I need to come up with some ideas for entertaining things we can do while they're here. I'm certain I asked you all for suggestions a while ago and, well, I don't mind saying your efforts have been woefully inadequate.  I mean, come on!  Do I have to do everything myself?!!

November 13, 2011: Fantasy Football Sunday!

Another grueling day of football-viewing has drawn to a close and I am wiped.  Looks like my fantasy football team, the Snow Monkeys, are headed down to defeat (their third in a row) and looking at a 6-4 record.  Thankfully, they're still in playoff contention.  Joining me on this day of channel-flipping were fellow fantasy football GM's Ivon Bartok, Patrick Gilmore, and Lawren Bancroft-Wilson.

On the menu -

Ivon's slow-cooked root beer-braised pork. Served with creamy cole slaw.

Handmade Ice cream sandwiches from Indulgence: tangy lemon buttermilk and chocolate banana.

I turned on the t.v. last night to some white guy rapping.  Which can only mean one thing: Christmas shopping season is upon us!

So, what are your holiday plans?  I'll be Montreal-bound with Akemi to spend Christmas with mom and sis, leaving the gang -

THE GANG

- in the care of our dog nanny and her boyfriend who'll be moving in while we're away.

Speaking of the gang, Maximus's blood test and x-rays came back a-okay, meaning he's good to go for surgery on Wednesday.  The procedure will remove part of the mass on his inside cheek and hopefully make him a little more comfortable.

Speaking of which – lately, I've been stricken by this mystery pain that comes and goes.  Now I'm no doctor, but I think I might have pulled a fallopian tube.  Anyway, it goes much more than it comes so I'll just monitor it for the time being.  In case things take a turn for the worse, however, I'm going to need you guys to monitor the blog so that you can swing by and give me a lift to the hospital if I need it.  Thanks.

Taking a break from leisure reading to study more Japanese.  The other day, we met a Korean exchange student who was conversational in Japanese after spending a year in Tokyo.  Conversational after one year of immersion!  I've been listening to those damn CD's for years and I'm lost three sentences into any conversation.  I've heard that most language learners have an easier time understanding a foreign language rather than speaking it – which I find altogether bizarre.  I understand next to nothing but can have wonderful chats with myself.

November 12, 2011: My Top 5 Favorite Comic Strips!

I am and always have been a comic book fan.  I'm drawn to their clever, multi-layered story-telling and character-driven narratives.  I'm also drawn to them because, admittedly, they take me back to my youth.  Like nutella.  And old Hammer horror movies.  And comic strips, what my father would refer to as "comics" back in the day.  I didn't read that many but the few I did follow I enjoyed immensely.  What follows are My Top F Favorite Comic Strips…

5. Calvin and Hobbes (Bill Watterson)

The quintessential comic strip buddies!  Calvin and Hobbes was at turns funny, brilliant, and surprisingly touching.  The complete, hardcover, three-volume, heavy-as-hell set sits downstairs in my library, waiting to be read.

4. Dilbert (Scott Adams)

If you've ever worked in an office, you can't help but empathize with Dilbert and his co-workers.  To quote Homer Simpson: "It's funny because it's true."

3. Bloom County (Berke Breathed)

Joyously subversive, Bloom County offered up some of the most hilariously colorful characters in comic stripdom, among them Bill the Cat and the ever optimistic penguin Opus.

2. Herman (Jim Unger)

This one takes me back, waaay back to late elementary school.  I used to read Herman along with a fellow fan – my father.  I loved the strip so much that I would assiduously clip every daily installment and then transfer and tape it into a dedicated scrapbook (that, I'm sure, is sitting somewhere in mom's garage).

1. The Far Side (Jim Larson)

Larson's awkward, bizarre, and devilishly humorous single panel strip remains my favorite.  It makes me laugh as hard now as it did twenty-five years ago.

So, what are some of your favorite strips I failed to mention?

Big day on the Fantasy Football front for both Ivon and me as both of our teams (his Running Dead and My Snow Monkeys) face must-win games. He's already at a disadvantage – Bush ran all over him Thursday night – so he's going to need a big game from all of his starters to have any hope of staying in the playoff race.  My Snow Monkeys suffered a costly loss last week and now need a win to help secure a playoff spot or risk falling out of contention.  I'm rolling with Romo tomorrow against a suspect Bills D.  Petersons my RB1 simply because he's Adrian Peterson while Maurice Morris slots into my RB2 spot while I await Jahvid Best's return (I'm sitting Brandon Jacobs against the 49ers #1 ranked rush defense and, until Daniel Thomas can prove he's healthy and capable of moving the ball, he's going to ride the bench as well).  Dropped the lacklustre Saints D for the surprising Browns defense.  Crosby is my kicker and Ballard starts at TE.  Which leaves my WR and Flex spots – and therein lies the problem.  Who do I start?  Well, I do know I'm starting Dez Bryant at WR1 as he'll be facing that porous Bills' D.  I think he'll be seeing plenty of looks with Miles Austin out.  That leaves four WR's for the two remaining spots.  My choices: 1. The underperforming Roddy White whose Falcons have a huge match-up against divisional rivals New Orleans, 2. All-pro pass-catcher Hakeem Nicks who is coming off a hamstring injury, is listed as questionable, and will be playing a tough 49ers defense, 3. KC's #2 WR Steve Breaston who has been fairly dependable the last four games or so.  He faces a terrible Broncos team and should see plenty of opportunities as the Denver D focuses on shutting down KC #1 WR Dwayne Bowe, and 4. Dark horse Michael Jenkins, the #2 WR in Minnesota that is playing Green Bay in what promises to be a high-scoring affair.  Common sense dictates I go with White and Nicks, but I've been burned by White so many times I'm not so sure I trust him, and I'd hate to start Nicks only to have him pull up lame and miss part of the game – or worse, not start at all!  So, what do you guys think?

Today's entry is dedicated to blog regular 2cats and Sheryl.  Condolences.

Tagged: Bloom County, Calvin and Hobbes, comic strips, Dilbert, Herman, The Far Side

November 11, 2011: The Vancouver Food Truck Tour on Pause! Organizing my Comic Book Collection! Reading! Watching!

Well, damn.  Here I was, all ready to set out on the next leg of the Vancouver Food Truck Tour only to discover that the food trucks I planned on hitting had taken the day off.  What do food trucks do on their day off?  Hit the car wash?  Lounge about the garage?  Okay, I know today is Remembrance Day and it is a holiday, but my handy Food Truck app clearly specified which trucks were up and running and which trucks were not. Both Roaming Dragon and Mangal Kiss WERE up and running – according to my app.  Interestingly, these were the same two food trucks that were supposed to be up and running last week too but were nowhere to be found.  Oh, well.  Clearly, the fates are going to a lot of trouble to steer me clear of both Mangal Kiss and Roaming Dragon, so maybe I should listen. Next week, instead, I think I'll head on over to Nostradmus for some lomito and churrasco Chilean-style hot sandwiches, Varinicey for pakoras, Fattrac for teriyaki subs, and Taser Grilled Cheese Sandwiches for…what else?

Whew!  Spent the last hour or so organizing a very small portion of my old comic book collection.  Double damn!  Who knew how many X-Men titles were out there?  Want to guess?  The answer is: a lot, especially when you factor in all those limited series and one-shots.  Anyway, the point of all this organizing – beside the whole neat and tidy thing – is this:

I figure "Why by trade paperbacks if I already have the collected issues?".  And: "Why not assemble those collected issues in a nice, handsome binding?".  I mean, could you imagine toting the 600+ Mighty Thor collection up to your bedroom?  Light reading, it aint – but it'll certainly keep you busy.

Hey, someone mind answering a comic book-related question.  Specifically, a Daredevil-related question.  Yes?  Okay, I'll ask anyway: I've got almost the entire run of the new series starting with the Kevin Smith/Joe Quesada first volume through to most recent trade paper release.  For some reason, I'm missing issues #20-25.  Now the interesting thing is I haven't missed any volumes.  Volume 3 collects Daredevil #16-19 and volume 4 collects Daredevil #26-31.  There is no volume 3.5.  What gives?  Das, ask you're buddy Bendis what's up with that.  It was during his run (#16-81).

Spoke to Paul today.  He's back in town and much relieved.  We talked Dark Matter and some of the projects sent our way.  Our agent called last week, suggesting we have a conference call to discuss 2012 and beyond.  One of the first things he asked was: "Would you be willing to move to L.A.?".  My initial response was: "But I just got back."  My second response was: "I suppose it depends on the project."  If nothing else, accepting a job there will mean I'll be that much closer to my buddy Carl – mainly because Akemi, the dogs and I will be moving into his guest room.

On the book front, I switched gears and read a suspense novel, Deep Water.  It was my first Patricia Highsmith read and I quite enjoyed it.  So much so that I picked up Strangers on a Train yesterday.  On the anime front, I'm on the last disc of Coyote Ragtime Show.  How is this series not on more of your radars?  Lots of fun and plenty of SF action!

Today's entry is dedicated to our friend Deni.  Condolences.

November 10, 2011: Cute Overload!

For the past 18 months, my life has taken a turn for the cute.  Of course, it's no coincidence that eighteen months is about the amount time I've been together my girlfriend, Akemi, who hails from Japan: the Land of Cute (kawaii).  Yes, in Japan, cute is not only omnipresent in entertainment and fashion, but food and handwriting as well.  And, since moving in, Akemi has transplanted a bit of that kawaisa to Canada.

Akemi is so expressive, at times I feel like I'm dating a cartoon character.

Fruit messages are de rigueur.

The shades, the hands tucked into the sleeves of her coat, the tilt of the head. Christmas Card worthy.

The fruit at my house not only boasts messages but the occasional face as well.

About to tuck into her naruto.

Messages, faces and, occasionally, names.

All dressed up and ready to go in her new shiroi coat.

Settling in quite nicely. The cold weather has afforded her the opportunity to show off her cute fashion sense.

Even eating can be cute.

Akemi is all about appearance when it comes to food. At the grocery store, she'll dismiss certain produce as "chotto ugly". Her fruits and veggies should be as cute as the truffles she makes - these for Ivon. His response when I gave them to him today: "Akemi is so cute."

Pinky pyjama party!

Even her flipping me off is done in cute fashion.

Cute Cooking 101: It's all about the apron. She's become a bit of an aficionado. Every weekend while we were in Toronto, she would visit the apron shop. Yes, there's an apron shop.

Pointing out her cute ear muffs. It was either these or the Hello Kitties.

Out and about. Cute. And me.

Sending out the last of the paperwork for Akemi's sponsorship application tomorrow.  Hopefully, it will be accepted and she won't have to leave the country in late April of 2012 (coincidentally, her visitor's visa expires on her birthday).  Life would certainly be a hell of a lot less cute without her.

The gang.

Thanks to everyone who asked about Maximus (pictured above, he's the bewildered-looking black pug in the front).  He's having a very difficult time eating because of the melanoma in his mouth.  He's scheduled for surgery on Wednesday that will remove part of the tumor and hopefully make him a little more comfortable.

November 9, 2011: Ending my SG-1 trip down memory lane with Unending!

UNENDING (1020)

Word had come down a couple of months earlier.  Stargate: SG-1 was finally coming to an end.  And, to be honest, despite the countless 11th hour reprieves that saw us coming back year after year, the many changes the show had undergone, the fact that we were producing a lofty tenth season of the series, I was genuinely surprised.  And disappointed.  With the re-shifting of the show creative two seasons earlier, and the promotion of Claudia Black to series regular that year, I felt the show had been revitalized and could have gone another season – at least.  There were still stories to tell and I would have loved nothing better than to get a shot at telling them.  And, we almost did. Soon after we got word that the show had been canceled, talks were underway to save it, talks that actual bore fruit.  The plan was to produce an eleventh season of SG-1 as an online exclusive, anticipating a business model that has saved several shows since.  All the pieces were falling into place and it looked like we were going to save SG-1 – and we would have, if not for a contractual obligation that ultimately killed the plan.

Looking back, I have nothing but fond memories of the show and the many, many individuals who brought it to the small screen, contributing to a series that ran an astounding ten seasons and produced an incredible 214 episodes.  Although I disagreed with the decision to cancel us, putting things in perspective, it's hard to find fault with a network that rescued us halfway through our marathon run.  If not for SyFy (formerly known as SciFi), Stargate: SG-1 would have ended with its fifth season on Showtime.  There would have been no Mitchell or Vala, no Ori or Anubis, no Landry, no McKay, and, perhaps most crucial of all, no Teal'c unwittingly attending a reading of the Vagina Monologues.  It was a great ride but, like all rides – great or otherwise – it finally came to an end, in this instance with the ironically titled Unending, episode #214, written, directed, and produced by longtime Stargate Exec. Producer Robert Cooper.  It was clever in that it offered the best of both worlds: a glimpse into the future of the characters viewers had grown to know and love over the show's many, many years, and the promise that their present-day adventures would continue.  Which they did, in two direct-to-video movies: Ark of Truth and Continuum.

You can't please all of the people all of the time and, while many fans loved the series ender, other took issue with – well, take your pick: the end of the Asgard, the absence of O'Neill, Daniel and Vala finally getting together, Sam and…Teal'c(?!).  Still, I loved the way it provided answers and, even if those answers were undone at episode's end, they nevertheless hinted at possible things to come.  I was sorry to see the Asgard go (after so many years, I'd come to delight in the antics of those genderless, passive-aggressive know-it-alls) but I was equally sorry to receive their parting gift, the Asgard core that has been consigned to Area 52 for long-term R&D.

Rob saved the shot of the team heading through the gate, one last time, for the very end.  From what I hear, they didn't get around to it until well after midnight.  I thought it bittersweet that, while everyone behind the scenes was saying their goodbyes that night, the scene that had preceded the farewells not only left the door open to future adventures but suggested a familiarity and routine that would continue, albeit unseen.  Although the fans wouldn't be privy to these future off-world travels, they could take solace in the fact that SG-1 was still out there, doing what it did best: keeping the galaxy safe for the rest of us.

Tagged: SG-1, Stargate, Stargate: SG-1

November 8, 2011: Today's Blog Entry? (What else?)

Alexander writes: "Hi Joe! In an earlier post I posted the question to you about your involvement with SGULIVESON and the SGU season 3 that has now been given airing dates on Justin.Tv. The claims have been made that yourself, MGM, and the SyFy channel are involved in this endeavor. Can you please tell me if you are involved in this and if there is any truth to this individual's fantastical claims?"

Answer: "Hi Joe! In an earlier post I posted the question to you about your involvement with SGULIVESON and the SGU season 3 that has now been given airing dates on Justin.Tv. The claims have been made that yourself, MGM, and the SyFy channel are involved in this endeavor. Can you please tell me if you are involved in this and if there is any truth to this individual's fantastical claims?"

Answer: Never heard of them and I'm quite certain that nobody who was involved in the actual Stargate franchise (producers, MGM, or SyFY) has heard of them either.  File this one under "bullshit".  Interestingly, their website not only claims that I'm a consultant and co-writer on their little playhouse production, but Paul Mullie as well.  Heh.  Right.  The day my writing partner takes time off from his family to write fan fiction is the day I trade in my suits for tie-dye t-shirts and the vegan lifestyle.  Hopefully, these guys are more convincing writers than they are liars.

Anyway, thought I'd kick off today's entry by answering that question and putting the matter to rest.

So, Akemi was in the mood to watch a movie last night and, among the DVD's we rustled out of the library was Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, one of my favorite movies!  At first she was a little leery watching a forty year old movie, but that initial skepticism quickly faded and, in no time, she was singing along in her broken English, enjoying it immensely.  Enjoying it so much, in fact, that she also ended up watching the 2005 version starring Johnny Depp as Michael Jackson Willy Wonka.  "Why can't I remember any of the songs from the new movie?"she wondered aloud. "Probably because the songs from the first movie were good,"was, I thought, the obvious answer.  She's had her laptop cued up, replaying the Pure Imagination sequence all day.  I ended up buying her the album on iTunes.

Emboldened by my success, I'm considering introducing her to some of my other all-time old favorites: A Christmas Story, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Planes Trains and Automobiles, Dirty Rotten Scoundrels and, of course, Reservoir Dogs.

In the news…

Middle school football coach relives his glory days by proving even the most committed 13 year old player can't take him down: http://ca.sports.yahoo.com/highschool/blog/prep_rally/post/Coach-breaks-13-year-old-8217-s-collarbone-with?urn=highschool-wp8230. Kind of reminds me of one of my old high school gym teachers who would always assume the quarterback position whenever the class played football.  I remember one game, breaking free of the kid covering me and running up the middle of the field – only to have the pass clang off my stone hands, incomplete.  My teacher's response: "Nice catch, Ramesh!"  A double zinger, not only zinging me but my buddy Ramesh who'd had nothing to do with the play.

Ah, high school.  It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of Dungeons and Dragons, it was the age of between 13 to 17, it was the epoch of disco, it was the epoch of Adam and the Ants, it was the season of (You) Light (Up My Life), it was the season of Dark (Side of the Moon)ness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had home computers and The Simpsons before us, we had mood rings and Tony Orlando and Dawn behind us, we were all going direct to the Book Market for deals on X-Men comics, we were all going direct the other way (home to watch Gilligan's Island) - in short, the period was so far unlike the present period, that some of its nosiest authorities insist on its being reviled, for good and for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.

So, what was high school like for you guys?  Inspiring highlights?  Crushing lowlights?  Do tell!

Today's entry is dedicated to blog reader Sparrow_hawk!

November 7, 2011: Maximus update! Another blog for you to follow! Alexander and Sarah are my place-bound! Name that wardrobe item! Welcome Euphemia Finn! Mailbag!

My poor buddy, Maximus, somewhat revitalized since his return home to Vancouver, has taken a downturn these past few days.  His appetite is there but the melanoma in his mouth makes chewing very difficult.  Lately, he's taken to following me around and just parking himself beside me when I'm on my laptop.  I'm bringing him in for a vet visit tomorrow to discuss the merits of a procedure to remove part of the visible tumor and, hopefully, improve his quality of life.

 Hey, look who's blogging now!  It's none other than my old Transporter nemesis, Tara Yelland -

Look at her. All cool and such because she's suddenly blogging.

You can follow her mundane existence here: http://tarayelland.wordpress.com/

Speaking of Transporter connections, I received word the other day that my old Production office mates, Alexander and Sarah, will be Vancouver-bound in a week or two.  I've got to start coming up with a gameplan!  How would you entertain a cantankerous, tattooed, country music-lovin' German?

Okay, you eagle-eyed Stargate fans.  It's time to play: Guess the Stargate Wardrobe!

The following item, modeled by handsome Lawren Bancroft-Wilson, appeared in which episode of the Stargate franchise and was worn by which character?  First person to guess correctly receives the admiration of thousands of his/her fellow blog readers and the nickname "Eagle Eye" bestowed upon them for the remainder of the calendar year.

Congratulations to the Finn family on the birth of their first daughter!  Blog regulars will know that we held a contest to name the child of my former assistant, Trevor Finn.  Unfortunately, neither Oprah nor Spearmint made the final cut.  In the end, Euphemia won – although now Trevor is trying to go back on the agreement that saw him keep his job in exchange for my blog readers naming his kid.  Fortunately, suspecting a double-cross, I took the precaution of filling out the birth certificate in advance.  So Euphemia Finn it is!  Congratulations to mother, Holly, who suffered through labor and gave birth.  And the father, the lazy bastard who no doubt simply stood by and watched.

Mailbag:

Patricia Stewart-Bertrand writes: "Why does Ivon have an open laptop in just about every picture you take of him? Is he up to something nefarious, I hope?"

Answer: Nope.  Just obsessively checking his fantasy football scores.

Lou Zucaro writes: "I'm curious how you served the braised meat trio."

Answer: With their braising mirepoix (celery, onions, and carrots) over a parsnip mash.

Lou Zucaro also writes: "Is all your cooking experience from watching Food Network and just trying stuff?"

Answer: I used to cook quite a bit in Montreal, but the Food Network definitely inspired me to get back in the kitchen.

Lou Zucaro also writes: "Also…you've been quiet about the premiere of Top Chef. Did you and Akemi watch it, and if so, what'd you think?"

Answer: Unfortunately, I have to wait for Food Network Canada to air it – usually severals weeks, even months, after the original American broadcast.

Ben writes: "I was wondering if you – or your readers – could point me in the direction of the books I should be reading – I'm highly ignorant of the genre in fiction. So where should I begin?"

Answer: Well, you've already picked up some John Scalzi, so that's a great start.  For terrific space opera, check out the works of Iain M. Banks (Consider Phlebas, Player of Games, Use of Weapons, etc.) and Alastair Reynolds (Revelation Space, House of Suns, etc.).  Some titles I've really enjoyed = Glasshouse by Charles Stross, The Ophiuchi Hotline by John Varley, The Dark Beyond the Stars by Frank M. Robinson, Camp Concentration by Thomas Disch, The Speed of Dark by Elizabeth Moon.  Start with those and get back to me.

maggiemayday writes: "Do you like goat?"

Answer: Love it.  Roasted!

Lloyd67 writes: "Where did you find your "Original animation cell" of the simpsons? I want one!"

Answer: It was a gift from actor Dan Castellaneta (the voice of Homer Simpson) after he guest-starred on Stargate: SG-1.  He was well aware of the fact that all of the producers (including Richard Dean Anderson) were HUGE fans of his show.

Ben writes: "Not to ruin your enjoyment of them, but I find the Kobe Beef to be a bit short on, well, meat. The muscle to fat ratio is way too low for my liking."

Answer: It was perfect, nicely marbled and mouth-meltingly tender.  Your remark reminds of my last trip to Tokyo with Stargate Special Features Producer Ivon Bartok.  We went out for yakiniku and ordered the top of the line meat for grilling.  Top of the line, it turns out, meant HEAVILY marbled.  So marbled, in fact, that Ivon and I felt queasy for the rest of the day.

Debra writes: "How is the process going with Akemi?"

Answer: Well.  We've forwarded our lawyer all the required paperwork.  Now, she's going over the documents to make sure everything is in order after which she'll file our request.  Fingers crossed.

jojo writes: "The first night the menu was displayed on the table. I made the mistake to read it. I was horrified at what I read and couldn't touch anything."

Answer: Now I'm intrigued.  What the heck were they serving?

Paloosa writes: "Is the flavor in the meat or the fat?"

Answer: Both.  The melted veins of fat yield a more fork-friendly texture.

November 6, 2011: Daring Food!

Port-Braised Ox-Tail, Veal Cheek, and Short Rib.

I'm a fairly adventurous eater and will try almost anything at least once.  I'm fairly open-minded when it comes to sampling atypical menu items but, of course, that doesn't mean I like everything I sample. Blood preparations (ie. sausages and puddings) have never won me over, not because of the main ingredient but because of their texture and consistency.  Brains have a  nice creamy texture but its their aftertaste – an unpleasant metallic undertone – that makes them hard to enjoy.  I find tripe too chewy, kidneys unpleasant in flavor, and duck tongues boney and relatively meatless.  On the other hand, I love foie gras (fatty duck and goose liver), delight in thinly sliced charcoal grilled cow tongue, and always order the chicken feet whenever I'm out for dim sum.

I like daring food.  I like to eat it.  I like to watch its preparation on the Food Network.  And, lately, inspired by the culinary creations of the Iron Chefs and Top Chef contestants, I've liked preparing it as well…

Pictured above is the braised meat trio I made a few weeks back for football Sunday – because, of course, nothing says football like ox-tail, veal cheeks, and short ribs.  My variation of the recipe calls for an entire bottle of port, reduced by half, as the braising liquid.  After eight hours of slow-cooking, the meat is fall-off-the-bone tender.

Pork Cheek Two-Ways.

You're unlikely to find the more daring meats on display at your local butcher.  Fortunately, the gang at Market Meats (2326 West 4th Avenue – Vancouver) are more than happy to accommodate unique requests.  Like the other week when I went in and asked them for pork cheek, figuring I'd have to place a special order.  "Pork cheek?"asked my man Spencer.  "You bet."  He disappeared into the back and returned a minute later with a package.

I ended up making Pork Cheeks two ways.  The first braised in an ice wine and pear reduction, the second marinated with apples, dijon, sugar, and chicken stock before being seared and finished in the oven. A double-dish worthy of Top Chef.  I saved a couple of pieces for Lawren who, uncertain at first, needed only a couple of bites to convince him to polish off the leftovers.

On that visit to Market Meats, in addition to the pork cheeks, I also picked up a package of sweetbreads.  For those of you who don't know, sweetbreads are neither sweet nor any sort of bread.  They're the thymus gland of a calf (or lamb).  Although they may look like brains, they possess a much firmer consistency.  Like brains, however, they require a whole song-and-dance advance preparation.  In the case of sweetbreads, they are soaked overnight in cold water (the water should be changed three or four times), then rinsed, patted dry, and the connective tissue and membrane removed.  Then, they're pressed and refrigerated for another few hours to remove any excess liquid.  I know, I know.  To most, they may seem more trouble than they're worth. Hell, I'm sure that, to most, the simple act of making a trip to your butcher to buy them would be more trouble than they're worth, but, like ox-tail, they're something I grew up with.  My mother would serve them, bacon-wrapped and crispy-grilled.  I decided to make them three ways…

Pan-Fried Sweetbreads with Metaxa

I dust them with flour, then pan fry them until golden, season them, then add a half cup of Metaxa and flambe.  Once that's done, add a few tablespoons of cream to finish and voila!

Pan-Fried Sweetbreads with Tarragon and Veal Demi-Glace.

I followed the same preparation as the first dish, dusting with flour and browning, then add some fresh tarragon and a veal demi-glace.  I allow that to cook down for five minutes, then serve.  This was our favorite of the trio.  Tarragon lends it a wonderful sweetness.

Roasted Chimichurri Sweetbreads

I dipped these in a chimichurri sauce made of blended fresh parsely, fresh oregano, garlic, and jalapeno peppers, then simply oven-roasted them.

Finally, today -

Kobe Beef Steaks

Kobe steaks are daring only insofar as, at about $80 a pop, you risk major disappointment if you screw them up.

I brought them up to room temperature a half an hour before cooking, then seasoned them with salt, pepper, thyme, rosemary, and chives before searing them over medium-high heat in a cast-iron pan -

I finished them in the oven (325 degrees for approximately eight minutes).  Alas, I forgot to take a picture of the finished product so you'll have to trust me.  They were delicious.

Finally, dessert -

Akemi's tiramisu.  This time, only daring insofar as a failure to mention it could well prove hazardous to my health.

A sad weekend for my Snow Monkeys.  They were trounced and it looks like it's time to make changes.  Besides Romo, my two best players were late waive wire acquisitions: Steve Breaston and Brandon Jacobs!  NoShow Moreno, you're cut!  Gaffney, you're cut!  Watson?  Cut!

The Running Dead also came up short, potentially costing Ivon a playoff spot.  Over in his league, looks like Lawren has an uphill climb for a playoff spot as well.  Rob, on the other hand, is simply relieved his Cowboys won.

November 5, 2011: Reflecting back on SG-1′s final episodes! Help a monkey out here!

My trip down SG-1 memory lane is almost complete.  145 episodes down; 3 to go…

FAMILY TIES (1018)

The SG-1 family had officially learned its fate during production on Bad Guys so, at this point in the season, we already knew we were done.  I'd already broken this story, a fun romp that offered up a little backstory into the Vala character (in addition some insight into to Landry and Lam's past), and couldn't really deviate – but since I was in the process of writing the script at the time, a little foresight did give me the opportunity to include a few subtle (?) references to the cancellation, in addition to one of my favorite endings in Stargate history.  This episode was also memorable for the hilarious performance of guest star Fred Willard who played the part of Vala's incorrigible father.

We open with Mitchell and Siler heading down the corridor, catching them in mid-conversation.  The first words out of Mitchell's mouth: "They cancelled it? Really? I didn't even know the new season had started." echoed the online comments of many a fan when they discovered SG-1 had been canceled.  And, later in the episode, Jacek in conversation with Carter: "That's too bad. Because after all your Stargate program has accomplished for this network – of planets, I would think the decision makers would show it the respect it deserves."  There were a couple of other references, but I was asked to lose them for the final draft.

Surprisingly, something that no one asked me to lose was the final scene in which Teal'c unwittingly attends a reading of the Vagina Monologues (Sorry. Virginia Dialogues.).  I put it in the first draft, fully expecting to be told "Very funny, but you've got to lose it."  Surprisingly, nobody asked me to take it out. Oh, I'm sure some thought about it, or assumed I would make the decision to take it out myself before the episode went to camera, but the scene went over so well with everyone else that I elected to keep it.

DOMINION (1019)

Well before this episode aired, I had fans online asking: "What would happen if a goa'uld symbiote was implanted in an Ori?".  Well…close enough.  This episode is packed with back-references (Adria, Baal, ascension, the memory altering device), jumps back and forth in time (between the present and a past that didn't really happen), pays off long-standing storylines, and propels the show's major arc in a bold new direction.  Which, alas, we wouldn't be able to pick up until the Ark of Truth movie.  But that's a reminiscence for another blog entry.  It was a huge cliffhanger – Would Adria be back and under what circumstances? – but we took solace in the fact that the plan was to make two movies, at least one of which would allow us to close out the Ori arc.  BTW, favorite line = "It's the bad guy equivalent of cordon bleu!".

Hmmm.  My Snow Monkeys face another tough match-up this weekend against the Pigskin Pirates.  My two top RB's are out (Peterson and Best are on byes) and it looks like I'll have to play perennially ineffectual NYG RB Jacobs, gimpy Daniel Thomas, or Denver's NoShow Moreno.  I'm starting Romo, who I believe should have a good day at home against the Seahawks, and am happy with my WR's: Dez Bryant vs those same Seahawks and Roddy White vs. the Colts.  Cleveland's Ben Watson is my fill-in TE, Green Bay's Crosby is my kicker, and I'm rolling with the Saints D that should lay a beatdown on the Bucs following their embarrassing showing in St. Louis.  Now, here's the BIG question: Who do I play in the flex?  Do I bench one of my three RB's in favor of Steve Breaston who'll be up against a porous Dolphins secondary?  Help a monkey out here.