Chloe Stowe's Blog: The Words and Madness of Chloe Stowe, page 5

The Less

Today was flu shot day. It went without a hitch (or a panicky twitch). The fact that I’m able to go do this kind of stuff without any outward dramatics (inside my heart is still flipping and flopping like a tuna on a Georgia highway) is utterly amazing. Yes, I’m still a misfiring nut but I’m less of one today than I was before. Bottom line: Sometimes blessings are truly all about the ‘less’ in their middles. Until tomorrow… Chloe #bottomline #blessings #anxiety #panic

The First Bite

“Gladiolas. Pittosporum.” Welcome to the opening line of my first Cozy Mystery. I’ve always been fascinated with the first words authors hand to their readers. It’s what the audience digests first, what lies in their belly the longest and flavors all that comes after. I’ve often chosen a book to read based only on its first line. Hence, a lot of thought and OCD-ness went into my choice for The Shallcross Burden. So, what comes after “Gladiolas. Pittosporum.”, you ask? Why, “Ti leaves, a blood red variety,” of course. Until tomorrow… Chloe #openingline #TheShallcrossBurden

The Advantage of Distance

I dove back into my Cozy Mystery yesterday. Splashed around a bit, getting myself all cozy (hee-hee) again in its waters. It went well. The break from penning fiction was good for me, I think. I can look at my writing more objectively now. There’s a distance there that didn’t exist before. Room to move and remark and cross-out that doesn’t leave my authorial soul bleeding. Yeah, it’s weird. But, really, would you expect anything less from me? Until tomorrow… Chloe #objectivity #distance

The Path Forward

Decision made. I’m suspending all efforts of self-publishing my previously or never released novels or novellas. All writing from today forward will be reserved for two projects alone. 1.) The Shallcross Burden… Why? I want to see if I can do it. I’ve challenged myself to write a Cozy Mystery and, so, I will do it. I will do it darn well, too. 2.) Sports writing for the Maryland Sports Blog… Why? I’m good at it. I enjoy it, and I’m getting better at it every day. Who knows what the future will bring in the field. Of course, I will continue this blog. A full-court press on a Cozy and a job-like situation will no doubt fire up the ol’ crazy. I’ll need help with that. And, I hope, my honest travails will help someone else out there not feel so alone. Decision made. Time to go puke up an intestine. Until tomorrow… Chloe #decision #objectives

The Teetering Thought

I’m teetering on the point of just writing what I want. Forget targeting markets or trends or publishing houses or agents. Just write a story I want to write. The process of sitting down and spinning up a tale out of thin air is the process I enjoy. It is the magic I’m good at. I don’t want to waste it on chasing down a tarnished nickel. Yep, I’m teetering. Until tomorrow… Chloe #magic #writing #chase

Long, Pointy Things

I’m poking at my limits with long, pointy things. Oh, this is probably all kinds of foolish. My limits hold back terrible things (panic, anxiety, Panic, Anxiety, PANIC, ANXIETY!) But still I poke. Fool. For the fourth week I will be live-tweeting a college football game today… for a pro sports blog with 25+K followers. J. O. B. I dare not put those letters together, but there it is. No money, but TONS of experience and the bulking up of my writing R. E. S. U. M. E. Oh, yeah. Fool here. Until tomorrow… Chloe #anxiety #panic #job #resume #fool

Friday Parentheticals

The muse slept late. (Four-legged, furry and 16 ½ years old, she’s entitled.) I had to call the insurance company. On the phone. Talking was required. (Truly nightmare stuff for my brain miswiring.) Royalty report arrived. And got trashed. Immediately and with great vigor. (No one wants to go there, alright.) Add all those together and you get why today’s blog is late. (You also get why I’m on enough meds to choke a draft horse.) Apologies. Now, scurry on with your Fridays. (And have good ones for me, please.) Until tomorrow… Chloe #anxiety #muse

Blind Spot Solutions

You know those solutions that are straightforward, logical and downright “duh”? Well, they live and play in my blind spot. I don’t see them. It’s like they don’t exist… until I crash into them and send us all careening down the nearest cliff, that is. I bumped into one of those solutions yesterday. Surprisingly, there was no crash. No fireball. No shrieks and curses and ambulances rolling in over the hill. It was just a bump and a friendly “Well, hello there.” Bottom line: Writers, check your blind spot regularly. Until tomorrow… Chloe #solutions #blindspot

A Locomotive in the Grass

After a day of regathering myself, I am ready to push on. The first shove outside of my writing commitments will be… I have no idea. Well, I have plenty of ideas, but the follow-through behind any of them is simply lacking. Thankfully, my reporting on all things Navy or Nat for MDsportsblog keeps my writing crisp and fresh, so I’m in no danger of going stale but… If being a novelist is all about locomotion, I have the ‘loco’ but none of the motion these days. And what use is a locomotive in the grass? Until tomorrow… Chloe #locomotive #followthrough

Deep Breath Day

I worked myself alarmingly thin yesterday. I worked too hard for too long and the whole body rebelled. Unpleasantly. So, today will be one of deep breaths. I will bulk my psyche back up and enjoy just where I’m at. And, then, tomorrow I will once again chase the future. Final thought before that first deep breath: Fragility sucks. Until tomorrow… Chloe #anxiety #fragility #psyche