Jennifer Bebb's Blog, page 6
June 21, 2011
travel…
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Today is another travel day…this time we're heading to Tofino, BC. We haven't been there before, but it has been on our list of places to visit for a long time.
We'll be photographing Anita and Sam's wedding tomorrow – we're hoping to take advantage of the dramatic weather Tofino can have, and make something incredible for these two. Keep an eye out at
June 20, 2011
Remembering Heidi
There are moments in life when an emotion hits you like a physical punch. It's usually unexpected, winding you in its ferocity and forcing you to gasp for breath. Fortunately, those moments are also relatively rare, making their impact that much stronger and lasting.
Two years ago I experienced that kind of gut wrenching moment. I know exactly where I was – standing in an open field, outside a lacrosse game, watching my boys rest between Logan's games. It was a tournament weekend, Logan's first tournament, and the kids were having the time of their lives.
What a strange juxtaposition of emotion. On one hand I was watching my oldest son discover the exhilaration of competition. On the other hand I was waiting for a phone call with news that could only be awful. And although I expected that call at any moment, when it came I didn't want to answer. I knew what the voice was going to say, I already knew what had happened. I wanted to wait, to stall, to avoid the unconscious knowing becoming a reality to be dealt with.
I wanted this moment of safety, this moment of happiness, to be forever.
June 17, 2011
June 16, 2011
Really, Vancouver? Riots?
I lived through the Canucks' cup run in 1994 and the subsequent riot. It was bad. Really bad. My boyfriend and I had gone downtown to celebrate, or commiserate, with fellow hockey fans and before I knew it, I was in the middle of a riot, trying to get out. Torn between my desire to be safe and my desire to stop the looting, I stood my ground in front of a smashed store window and moved only when the riot police appeared right beside me.
That entire event remains clear in my mind – the way the mood of the crowd was different that night, the way it took just a few people acting out to incite a mob mentality. I've never been so afraid in my life. I had never been so embarrassed for my city. Until last night.
An apology to the world
I am ashamed that this happened. This is not Vancouver, this is not the city that hosted the Olympics last year without major incident. This was a humiliating conclusion to a wonderful show of sport. This was not about the sport, this was about something else, and I am embarrassed that Vancouver showed so poorly.
There will be a lot of finger pointing, discussion, and blanket statements made. There will be repercussions to this act. That will all come as the days and weeks pass, and as these people are charged, or not.
As a citizen of the world, and a life long resident of the Vancouver area, I offer a humble apology to the world. This event does not represent the majority of people living here. This was an unfortunate and devastating event. And for that I am so very sorry. I am sorry that my children watched young men act out. I am sorry that they had to witness (via TV) the behavior they did. I am sorry it happened at all.
A Contrived Riot?
There is nothing glamorous about a riot. Not ever. It is a scary, destructive and useless show of arrogance, especially when a sporting event is used as an excuse. There is nothing sporting about a riot, nor was this riot caused by people there for the game. This was different, it had edge, a purpose, if you will.
Hooligans, trouble makers, young men, testosterone and adrenaline, alcohol…they've all been blamed for last night's riot. I'd like to add stupidity and hubris to the list. There was nothing brave or compelling about last night, and it certainly was not something to celebrate.
Our city burned, it literally burned, at the hands of a few. This was not a protest by the many. This was not a reflection of our people or our city. This was a determined band of young men who brought chaos and destruction to the night.
I hope you are proud. I know your parents are. (yes, that's sarcasm).
Social Media and Hooliganism
Raised in a world full of smart phones, you tube and cameras, last night's rioters saw nothing wrong with being captured on film. There are facebook postings and twitter updates bragging about the incidents of violence and destruction. People were live tweeting, posting updates as they burned cars or toppled porta-potties. They shared their amusement at hitting an officer in riot gear, or punching another person.
As I saw the #riot hash tag on twitter, I knew what was coming. We all knew what was coming. It likely would have happened with or without social media, but social media certainly contributed to the way this event unfolded last night.
It's not ok.
Imagine these people applying for a job and having their potential employers check their facebook profiles. Imagine your child was down there and you saw them on TV – live? Imagine the legacy of this, following these people through their lives.
There is nowhere to hide in this new world, nowhere to run from your behavior. And while that bodes well for the effort to find those at fault, what does it say about the generation of children we are raising? I watched them mug for the TV cameras last night, loot stores and start fires – all live on TV. They seemed proud, pumped up on the adrenaline of the mob mentality.
And that hubris, that arrogance, that fearlessness, will, hopefully, result in consequences for their actions. Their comfort with social media may just be their downfall.
Moving Forward
Vancouver has some work to do, a reputation to repair. So many Vancouverites were horrified and dismayed to have this happen again. It's humiliating and sickening and the majority of us are sick to our stomachs today. Shame on those who felt violence was fun. Shame on you young men and women who looted and burned our city.
You are an embarrassment to all of us and you should be ashamed of yourselves.
You're probably not.
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June 15, 2011
crossroads: I am…
….a writer. As much as I have worked to be other things, I am a writer.
That's not to say there are not other things I can do, and do well. That doesn't mean I'm not also a good photographer with a successful business. It has nothing to do with what I have done and what I will do, but it does impact the next stage of my journey.
Are you a photographer? Really? Down deep, in the secret parts of your soul, were you meant to be a photographer above all else?
If you answered yes to that question, congratulations. Either you are very self-aware, or you are lying to yourself. Only you know which it is, and you might not even know that for some time. My sense is that very few people are doing what they were born to do. Very few people even know what that is, what the ideal "job" for them might be. Most photographers in business liked taking pictures first, and fell into business second. But is it your calling, your purpose in life?
Grandiose words, aren't they – "purpose in life" and "calling"? They are big, beautiful words that sound wonderful, yet are useless without real meaning and understanding behind them. Words are like that, rife with the potential of intent but useless without the actuality of implementation. And yet words are my stock in trade, the thing I love and adore without question. Words are important to me…
…and so I write.
I can trace my writing back to when I was 6. That's the earliest sample I have. And I continued to write through adolescence and first loves, to my wedding and the birth of my children. I write in my head. I write on paper. I write this blog. I write for me. And I write for you. But whether you read this or not, I will still write it because that is what I do, it's who I am.
And so I find myself at this place where writing and the business of writing intersect. I want to try, to see if I can leverage my words and my sensibilities to provide for my family. But I am afraid that in doing that, I take the love out of it and it becomes a business, much like my love of photography is often superseded by the business of photography.
My writing is plain and simple, constructed of words I love and concepts important to me. It's not fancy or dolled up or full of complicated sentences. I am what I write and my writing is me. And while there is the odd hidden gem buried in my words, there is no pretense here – what you see is what you get, regardless of consequence. It may not win awards or garner accolades; It's what I know to do, and it's what I need to do.
Where do I go from here, what path do I take? Is this a fork or merely the merging of a new lane on this road of mine?
Fear holds me in place. Fear that I will fail as a writer. Fear that I will be judged a quitter for not focusing solely on my photography. Fear that people will think I couldn't make it in this business of photography and I'm leaving out of necessity rather than choice. Fear that I want to do both, but can't. Too much fear will keep me stagnant, not enough will make me cocky.
It is the story of my life, this fear of letting others down. And this fear forces me to cling to things far past the time to leave.
Crossroads are a place of decisions and actions. They require movement, a choice of direction. To the left is photography, to the right is writing. And straight ahead of me is the road I'm already on, simply wider with room for both choices. Despite the fact that I'm going to stay on this road, it is not the same, it has curved sharply and requires careful attention to navigate. There is no map for this road, it is newly constructed and freshly paved.
I am the first on it…this path is mine to make.
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June 14, 2011
being compelling
Google any subject or phrase and you will find hundreds, if not thousands, of articles about your interest. How, then, does one go about create compelling content and getting people to read that content?
That's the million dollar question, isn't it? It's the back bone to any freelancer wanting to find work, any blogger wanting to get subscribers, anyone who relies on being compelling for their success. Wedding photographers are freelancers, by the way, although many of us don't realize that.
A Compelling Voice
Finding your voice is one thing, choosing your voice is another. I've battled with this – I have a pretty strong voice in my writing, but I worried at times, that it wasn't the voice people wanted to hear. I chose to use a different voice at first, thinking that playing it safe would attract more clients.
It is your voice that people want to hear, not some watered down version of your voice, or a mimicry of another voice – they want your voice, your point of view, your experience and perspective. It's less about the actual words you use and more about the intention behind them. Some people share in a way that is funny and self deprecating, others use shock value in their message. Both voices have value, both send a message that is larger than the actual words or images they use…it is the authenticity of the voice that gives it credibility.
Let's repeat that: authenticity drives credibility.
The scary part of that statement is that you need to trust in who you are, and the message you want to share.
Compelling Content
How are people going to find you? Is trusting your voice enough? What must you do to get noticed and get jobs?
Trusting your voice is not enough, but it is a start. Choosing to be authentic automatically sets you apart from people following the herd. In fact, the herd followers start to become indistinguishable leaving their followers wanting (and needing) something more. There is a place for those who are different, distinct in their voices. Know this and trust that your authentic voice will be heard.
Trust your voice in the content you are sharing. If you are a wedding photographer your voice is heard in two places – your words and your images. Neither one is enough, and neither one can stand alone. The time of images speaking for themselves has passed.
Wedding photographers are faced with so much more than making images – they must also sell them to complete strangers whose only connection to the images is the fact that they are also getting married. The images are a single part of the equation that combines images, words and image. Yes, image – your image. (that's another post)
Freelancers in other industries face the same dilemma – the time of a simple portfolio of words or designs has passed. As a recent entrant to the freelance writing market, I'm learning each day about the importance of my voice in this process. It is not just the words found in the writing samples I create, it is the way in which I present them and myself to clients. Naively ignoring the lessons I learned in wedding photography, I pursued my writing without putting trust in my voice. In other words, I lacked credibility because I wasn't being authentic in my pursuits.
One Voice can be Heard
Are you guilty of playing it safe and doing what you think is expected of you? I am. Not in wedding photography, but certainly in freelance writing. Thankfully, I learn fast and learned this: originality is noticed and rewarded while conformity ensures you are forgotten.
Our biggest successes came after we realized that we needed to forge our own path, turning our backs on what others were doing and fine tuning our voices instead. As wedding photographers we did things our way, and that way worked for us. It won't work for you. Neither will any other photographer's way of making images. Your success will come when you take the tools others have given you and use them to share your voice through your images, not before. Emulation is fine, but take what you want to emulate and spin it to make it your own. Then, stop emulating anyone and start trusting yourself.
Use your voice, the one that is authentic to you. Know that not everyone is going to like it; not everyone is going to understand it. That's ok. The point of having a voice is using it. In a world where everything is starting to look and sound the same, saying something different will set you apart. Your images, your words, your image all combine to create something that is your own. Why would you want to follow where others lead only to blend with all their other followers?
Trust that your voice, your authentic voice, deserves to be heard. Trust that with authenticity comes credibility. Trust that clients will see and respect your voice. More importantly, trust that you have a voice and that your voice is compelling.
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June 11, 2011
At Nine
Nine years ago today we were at the beginning. At some point I blinked, and here we are today, nine years later, celebrating your birthday.
I know that you are more interested in birthday cake and presents, but your birthday is so much more than that to your Dad and I. For us, today is the day that we look back and wonder where the time went, how you got so big.
We spend today amazed at how lucky we are that we have you, grateful that it was you that came into our lives nine years ago, changing them forever in the process.
As your mom, I couldn't feel more lucky. Having a child is like rolling the dice – you simply don't know what you are going to get. We got lucky with your brother, and there was no guarantee we would have the same luck with you. But we did – you are more than we ever hoped for, more than we ever thought was possible.
You completed a family I never knew was unfinished. With you we are a whole family – you are our glue, my boy, you hold us together. You are the final puzzle piece, the one that finishes the picture and makes it right. To never have had you would have been a mistake, for without you, I never would have been complete.
Your smile really does light up the room and your laugh is contagious. But that is only the surface of how wonderful you are. The truth is that you are a born leader, leading, as all good leaders do, by example. You are more than the body that contains you, your spirit reaching into this world and bringing such delight.
As my youngest man-in-training, you reap the benefits of a brother than went first. You have a sense of self that we can all learn from, walking through this world with confidence and strength. You are a good friend, a great brother, and a son beyond all expectation.
Your Dad and I love you more than the world. And you know I love you more than all the drops of water in all the oceans in this world and all others. We wish that we were with you today, but you are in our thoughts and we will be home soon.
Happy Birthday, Ethan!! We love you!
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June 10, 2011
on the road. again.
Coming to you from Waikiki Beach….
Wedding Photographers, if you are shooting this weekend, here is some advice…
- shoot with a fresh eye, leaving stock ideas at home
- look for the light, it will guide you through the rest
- look behind you, something wonderful might be waiting for you
- anticipate the moment – the very best among us have mastered that
- be nice, no matter what happens
- speak with a smile in your voice, and on your face
- break some rules
- don't worry about the guests and their cameras, just shoot like you know you can
- remember, something will go wrong and you will handle it like a pro
- drink lots of water
- have fun – we are blessed to do this for a living
Aloha!
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