Jane Roper's Blog, page 10

Holiday cards stress me out.

I love you holiday cards, but I really, really don't like you.

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Perimenopause can kiss my ass.

Sorry, I realize that’s a rather, er, aggressive title. But, look, things are happening. Weird and annoying things. Things that are, obviously, minor perturbances in the grand scheme of space and time and pandemic, blah blah blah. But I reserve the right to whine about them nevertheless. Because the way I look at it, if […]

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Gratitude. Maditude.

It’s been a strange few weeks. I can’t remember the last time I felt so simultaneously grateful and happy on the micro-level—as in, the immediate circumstances of my life, and the good things in it—and despairing on the macro level. As in: I am freaking terrified for our country right now, in its divided, deluded […]

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Lighten up, Francis

When I resolved, in early 2019, to start writing a new novel, I had to give myself a lot of talkings-to. I did this chiefly via the post-its and index cards tacked to the windowsill in front of my desk—messages I’ve written to myself. One of them, which is right at eye level where I […]

If you always do what you’ve always done…

If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you always got. Thus spake somebody; nobody on the internet seems to be sure who. But it’s a good saying—a less derisive version of that other bit of wisdom, also of mysterious origins (it’s not actually Einstein, alas), about the definition of insanity […]

Climbing the walls

Back when my daughter Clio was in cancer treatment and I’d get together or chat with friends, there would inevitably come a juncture in the conversation where the friend would start complaining about one thing or another, in the way that friends do with each other—some headache at work or challenge with the kids or […]

The Apocalypse and Me (Part 2)

In which a man explains to me why I like post-apocalyptic books and movies. (And why this is not like that at all.) So, last time I wrote I confessed that I have slight prepper tendencies. This has served our family well—at least in the toilet paper and canned goods department—during this current disaster. (Although […]

The Apocalypse and Me (Part 1)

If you’ll indulge me, I want to talk to you about toilet paper. AKA Gold on a Roll. 2-Ply Platinum. Under-the-Sink Silver. (I just made  those up—feel free to use.) I have a confession about TP. Actually, it’s more like a brag: I started buying an extra pack here and there starting way back in […]

10 Exciting Things I’ve Accomplished at Home

Two-and-a-half weeks and change at home, no change whatsoever.  (See what I did there?) Yesterday was the day I started really feeling it, by which I mean the sense that time is stretching out in front of me like a vast,  hostile desert a la Mad Max (one of the few post-apocalyptic movies I haven’t seen in […]

About That Flaming Cat…

A few days ago, I mentioned that one of our cats, Opie, singed his fur by walking too close to a candle. (Idiot.) What I didn’t mention was 1.) How pungent the smell of burned cat hair is. (We had to open the windows) and 2.) Why we had a candle lit in the middle […]