BikeSnobNYC's Blog, page 6

Casting Call

Okay, firstly, if you're the doofus who was accusing me of selling out to Walmart because I went to Bentonville and spoke at the Arkansas Bike Summit, I really hope you read my reply to your comment because I mean come on now.

Though if you're trying to channel Rik from "The Young Ones" you're doing a great job:


Secondly, now that I'm back from Bentonville I find myself under great pressure, as I must audition all of my bicycles in order to determine which one gets to come on vacation with me.  Now, I know what you're thinking:

"Vacation?  Please.  You're whole life is a vacation!" 

And of course you're right, it is.  However, my wife's whole life isn't a vacation, and if you insist on accuracy then let's say it's her vacation and I get to tag along.  Be that as it may, the fact remains that deciding which of my many bicycles to bring is HARD WORK, and to that end today I auditioned the Jones Plus LWB Complete:


My ride was a leisurely jaunt up the Old Croton Aqueduct, then a quick turn through some quasi-secret suburban singletrack before heading back home.  I do continue to stand by my horse/wild boar comparison between this and the SWB, and I ask you to note that I made this comparison well before feral hog memes were cool.  I'm also prepared to say that overall I do prefer the LWB to the SWB, in part because I like the way it feels on the road, and in part because it offers better pedal clearance on the trail.  But the question remains:

Do I take it on vacation with me?

Pros:

I can go anywhere on itI can ride it in a t-shirt and jorts instead of putting on a bunch of Lycra, which means I can pack lighterIt's more comfy if I need to run the odd errandIt's new and new bikes are fun!
Cons:

What if it rains a lot, I'm relegated to the road the whole time, and I wish I had a road bike with me?That's kind of it, reallySo yeah, maybe it's not such a hard decision after all:

Then again, I could see myself pining for my new-to-me "forever" bike:


The ride is as smooth as a chamois slathered in lard.

Clearly I have a lot to think about.

New Outside Column, New Radio Show!

You may have about the recent spike in cycling deaths in New York City.  You may also have read that the city has recently unveiled a plan to stop it.  Well, my latest column for Outside is about what's going on and why it probably won't work:


Also, yesterday I fired up the ol' Broadcast-O-Mat 3000 and went on the air again.  You can listen here:


Many thanks to my special guest, bike advocate Courtney Williams, a.k.a. The Brown Bike Girl.  Caller highlights include Woman Who Honked At A Cyclist And Got Her Mirror Kicked Off Or Something (10:32), The Taxi Driver Who Admits Taxi Drivers Are The Problem (21:18), and of course The One And Only Leroy (28:25).

Also, it's recumbent upon me to remind you that WBAI is still fundraising, and that you're always welcome to go to the website and make a donation in the name of my show.  Do so and there could be a signed book in it for you.  (Unfortunately, I wrote the book.)

Finally, I was surfing the "You Tube" recently and guess who's still at it:


I could only watch a few minutes, as watching someone riding a bike on the highway at 50mph turned out to be surprisingly tedious.  (And this is Episode 2!)  Nevertheless, I'm glad he seems to be enjoying his Florida retirement. 

BSNYC Field Trip: Bentonville, Arkansas!

Way back in 2007, I started a blog.  That blog was called "Dog Fancy."  Well, it turns out there's already a magazine called Dog Fancy,* so I started another blog called "Bike Snob NYC."

Thanks to that blog, I've had a lot of notable experiences over the years: I got to hobnob with celebrity bike racers before they got disgraced, a legacy British saddle concern whisked me off to Tuscany to ride L'Eroica, and I was even on a radio show in London with John Hurt:

No, seriously, I really was on a radio show in London with John Hurt.

Well, here we are in 2019 and I'm still breaking new ground.  Some weeks back, I received an email from Aimee Ross of Bike Bentonville asking me if I'd like to come to that city and speak at the Arkansas Bike Summit.  Evidently, she'd enjoyed hearing me speak back when I spoke at the IMBA World Summit in Steamboat Springs back in 2014, which can only mean she was totally drunk.

I was intrigued.  Bentonville of course is the Global World Planetary Headquarters of Walmart, and I'd read about how the Waltons were turning it into a cycling destination.  Furthermore, for all the places in the world I've visited, I had yet to visit the southern United States.  (I mean yes, obviously I've visited south Florida countless times--I'm from New York for chrissakes, that goes without saying.  I'd just never gone anywhere in the southern United States where everybody didn't have a New York accent.)  So I readily accepted.

As I prepared to leave for my flight, I considered how I'd get to LaGuardia.  Do I summon an Uber, pay a bunch of money, and suffer the inevitable motion sickness that comes from sitting in the back of a Toyota Camry while a heavy-footed driver lurches along the Major Deegan in stop-and-go traffic?  Or do I take the subway down to 125th Street and then board the M60 bus to the airport, which would be much cheaper but also come with lots of traffic and motion sickness?

Then it hit me: why not just ride my bike to the airport?

I'd never ridden to the airport before, but the more I thought about it the more sense it made.  All I was carrying was a few changes of clothes and a laptop.  Also, it was an evening flight, which meant I could leave in the afternoon, ride at a leisurely pace, and still arrive at the airport with plenty of daylight to spare.  Most importantly, it would look great on my Strava.  And so off I went.

Sadly, the electronic device I use to record my rides failed to register my ride after all, but the bike directions provided by certain popular mapping application accurately reflect both the route I took as well as the amount of time it took me to get there:


In all, the ride was pleasant--basically it's just riding to Queens.  However, once you get to the airport itself is where the fun begins.  See, LaGuardia is basically one great big construction site, and while I'd looked up how to access the airport by bike I still had trouble finding the bike parking area.  In fact there was a dicey period there where I was riding along with all the taxis and Ubers jockeying for position in the arrivals area which I'm fairly certain you're not allowed to do on a bicycle, and I began to worry that I was going to get arrested.

So I stopped and consulted my phone, and I'd like to give a great big thank you to Josh, whoever he is, because it was his incredibly detailed web page that finally got me where I needed to go:

Thank you Josh!

In any case, if you're wondering, the bike racks are right outside the Terminal B parking garage, just across the street from the terminal itself:


And yes, of course they're those crappy racks that make it really difficult for you to lock your frame instead of your wheel:


By the way, in case you're wondering #whatluggageyourunning, the Two Wheel Gear bag you see on the bike contains my laptop and other small sundries and is my under-the-seat item.  Additionally, I am wearing a backpack, which contains my clothing and is my in-the-overhead item.  As for my wardrobe, I wore shorts.  My original plan was to change into long pants at the airport, since the idea of flying in shorts weirded me out, but by the time I actually got to the airport and started drinking it just didn't seem worth the effort:


Just think next time you choose your seat for a flight, you too could wind up next to the sweaty guy in shorts who just rode all the way there from the Bronx.

I arrived in Bentonville fairly late, and by 9:00 the next morning I was in downtown Bentonville at the Arkansas Bike Summit:


Where I was about to give a keynote talk on whatever the hell it is I talk about:


It was a pretty sweet speaking setup too, and I was pleased to see they'd included the couch and armchair I always stipulate in my rider:


Plus, I even made the news!


By 10am I'd finished boring everybody stiff and the day was still young, so after listening to some of the other speakers for a bit I wandered off to explore Bentonville.  Here's the original Walton's store, which is now a museum:


And which I visited for like 30 seconds:


They did sell some neat vintage toys in there though, including the BB gun from "A Christmas Story:"


Having also seen the actual house from that movie during my 2013 visit to Cleveland, it occurs to me now that I've completed yet another meaningless circle in life:


There's also plenty of non-retail history in Bentonville:


And this statue stands in the middle of Bentonville City Square:


I admit I found it jarring:


Though in a sense, considering its history, New York City is basically one gigantic monument to the slave trade so it's not like I felt smug about it.

One thing I did not expect to find in Bentonville was bagels:


Nor could I have anticipated being in the presence of the Oscar Meyer Weinermobile:


Evidently this is one of six Weinermobiles currently making their way across the United States, and I feel privileged to have witnessed such a rare and awesome spectacle.

And yes, Bentonville does have lots of bikey trappings, including workstands and pumps:


There's also a blue Walmart-branded bike in the background, and as far as I can tell those are just there for anyone who wants to use them, though I did not have occasion to use them.

After wandering around for a bit I ducked into a restaurant that could have been in Brooklyn just as easily as it could have been in Bentonville:


And as I sipped my craft beer and ate my hamburger on gluten-free bread the rain and thunder began.

Eventually the rain tapered off, but it didn't stop completely.  Even so, I couldn't sit around drinking beer all day (I mean I could have but that would have been both sad and expensive), and so under light and steady precipitation I followed the signs to the Crystal Bridges Museum:


As I walked the well-signed bike-friendly path, I lamented the fact that not only did I have no bike, but I'd also left my hat and water-resistant windbreaker back at the hotel:


My remaining hair was soon plastered to my head and my clothes were steadily taking on water, though even under these conditions the beguiling surroundings lulled me into a contemplative state:


And soon I was at the museum:


I didn't realize it yet, but the damp, solitary, primordial nature of my walk had primed my brain and rendered me highly susceptible to the power of art:


It may look a bit grey and glum in my crappy photos, but the museum is beautiful, even on a rainy day:


I also hadn't taken any time to read up on Crystal Bridges--I had a vague sense that Alice Walton had built some kind fancy museum and that was about it--so the effect of basically just stumbling into it while dripping wet was like thinking you're grabbing a sandwich and realizing you're in a 3-star restaurant.  (The museum also charges no admission fee, so it's like stumbling into a free 3-star restaurant.)  It's also important to consider that as a parent all my museum visits now consist of elbowing my way through crowds of tourists in order to take my kids to see dinosaur bones, so the idea of walking slowly and staring at pieces of fine art felt impossibly luxurious:


And walk slowly and stare at pictures is exactly what I did:


My time in the museum transported me high into the artsy-fartsy layer of the atmosphere, but eventually my feet alighted back on Earth and a glance outside indicated that the rain had eased up:


So I walked back to the square and summoned my hotel shuttle.  While I waited, I sipped from a gigantic lemonade served to in one of those quart containers they give you when you order wonton soup:


My hotel was just a few miles away from downtown, but the neighborhood it was in was was eminently unwalkable, which meant that my dining options for the evening were limited:


Is there a more saliva-inducing alliteration than Friday Fish Fry?  No, there is not.

The next morning I headed back downtown to Phat Tire Bike Shop, where I picked up the rental bike my hosts had kindly arranged for me.  The trails in Bentonville start right from downtown, and after just a few minutes of pedaling I was here:


Yes, just a stale Ozark bagel's throw from where I'd been marveling at art the day before were the most luxurious mountain bike trails upon which I'd ever ridden:


They were also remarkably dry despite the all the rain the day before:


And they incorporated all manner of built features:


So sumptuous were these trails that they were even stocked with food, beverage, and sunscreen, though I assumed those were for some event of which I was not a part and so I refrained from helping myself:


With each pedal stroke I marveled at how decadent these trails were--even the connector bits that ran along the road incorporated all manner of gratuitous features:


And they had better signage than the entire New York City Transit system or pretty much any major airport in the United states:


Best of all, everything flows together so nicely off the greenway that even an idiot like me couldn't manage to get lost:


Basically you just ride them and everything else sort of takes care of itself.  It couldn't have been more different from the twisty, rocky, rooty, knotty trail networks I'm used to in New York, which require years of riding before you really gain a sense of how everything works.

By the way, if you're wondering what I was riding, here's a closer look:


It's a Trek Fuel Plus, which I know because it said so on the handlebar:


I really enjoyed the bike, and the dual suspension was a novelty for me as I ride rigid bicycles pretty much exclusively.  Certainly I'm not about to run out and by a full-suspension mountain bike anytime soon, but it was certainly a pleasant diversion.

As I rode I considered pressing on all the way to the so-called "Back 40" trails, but stupidly I'd brought no food and also another rainstorm seemed imminent.  So instead I figured I'd play it safe and head back downtown via the greenway, then eat lunch and maybe head back out again later:


Shortly after I returned, that rain indeed did fall:


And while I'd only ridden for a couple hours I was just tired enough to call it a day.  However, I would not hesitate for a moment to return to Bentonville and indulge in another weekend of ultra-lush mountain biking and art-gawking.  I'd also strongly encourage you to do the same if you're in reasonable striking distance and looking for an indulgent weekend getaway.  (It's a fairly short and cheap flight from New York City, for example.)  The only things I'd do differently next time is stay a little closer to downtown, and do a lot more riding and eating.

*Hey, I just looked it up and Dog Fancy is now called Dogster.  Guess they must be looking for a millennial audience.

On The Air Again!

Good morning!

Just a very brief and rushed note before I head down to the studio to let you know that I'm on the radio this morning and also the station is having a fund drive, so please support Bike Snob if you can:

Bike Snob returns to @wbai this morning at 10am! Will talk about the "Green Wave" and more. Call in: 212-209-2877. Also, become a WBAI Buddy in the name of Bike Snob and get a signed* book**! (While supplies last.)

*Signed by me
**Written by mehttps://t.co/IIxWXMKGn9— Bike Snob NYC (@bikesnobnyc) July 29, 2019

Thank you and goodbye!

--Tan Tenovo

"You Only Come Around Here When You Want Something"

Yes, it's true, and what I want is for you to read my latest column for Outside, which is about why kids need to ride bikes:


If you really want yours to get ahead in life you'd better make sure they know their way around a velocipede.

I also want you to congratulate me for the fact that I haven't touched a bike with a derailleur all week.  For example, yesterday I enjoyed a pleasant outing on my artisanal singlespeed:


I also commuted into Manhattan on my Midlife Crisis Fixie, seen here in a prison cell:


And on Tuesday, not only did I forego derailleurs, but I also skipped the bike altogether and ran for the first time since 2018!  I felt pretty good, too--until the day after, and the day after that, and the day after that, which is today.  Of course, maybe I wouldn't still be sore if I'd been riding bikes with derailleurs instead of pushing one-speed drivetrains with sore legs, but if I were capable of making rational decisions I wouldn't be living in New York City and dedicating my life to writing about bicycles now would I?

No I would not.

Lastly, if you're among the one (1) people who noticed I wasn't on the radio this past Monday, my show was preempted by a fund drive, but I should be back this coming Monday.  And for the rest of you who had no idea I was on the radio in the first place, guess what?  I have a radio show in New York City now!

Now leave work early and go ride your bike.

New Outside Column, Now With E-Assist!

Here's my latest Outside column, which is about how you should get a tax break for buying an e-bike:


Though of course anybody who reads Internet comments knows cyclists don't pay any taxes at all, which invalidates my entire argument.

Speaking of e-bikes, Specialized is getting lots of press for this thing:


Now, to be clear, I don't think motorized Fred bikes should qualify for my tax cut, nor should e-mountain bikes or e-gravel bikes or any other assisted sporting bicycle.  No, in order to qualify for the subsidy you must purchase a bicycle that is appropriately utilitarian, as determined by a smugness panel of which I hereby appoint myself chairperson.  We (meaning I) will then evaluate every e-bike on the market* and determine whether or not it's eligible.  For example, Brompton Electric?  Subsidy:


Trek Powerfly?  No subsidy:

*[Manufacturers please send your kickbacks in digital currency to the following wallet address: 132040330581425017742601013954495679929193446910684375817922565556150614417166726937757457734098724]
This is not to say I have anything against sporting e-bikes, mind you.  My only concern about them now is that they're going to lead to a lot more people gratuitously calling out "ON YOUR LEFT!," which I cannot stand.  In fact, I feel strongly that e-bikes should be allowed in the Tour de France on the following basis:

I think every day in the TdF one rider, chosen completely at random, should get to ride an ebike. Would really liven things up--think of it like the mushroom in Super Mario Bros.https://t.co/9z6yL130Bc— Bike Snob NYC (@bikesnobnyc) July 18, 2019

Then again, I have no idea whether or not the Tour de France needs livening up this year, since I'm more detached from it than I've been in many years.  Indeed, I can officially say that I have absolutely no idea what's going on--and I don't mean that cynically, or smugly, or contemptuously, either.  It's just that at this point in my life my brain is basically a 10 Items Or Less line, and sadly the Tour is one of the things I've been forced to remove from my basket in order to get through the day.

That said, occasionally the odd tidbit seeps into my consciousness via Twitter, and this seems pretty compelling:

Rohan Dennis abruptly abandons the Tour de France; Bahrain-Merida says it will investigate why the Australian left the race: https://t.co/vKC64S9Nnt— VeloNews (@velonews) July 18, 2019

Usually when I disappear abruptly from a public place it's for one or two reasons: 1) I'm about to get in really big trouble; 2) I've really got to use the bathroom.  So perhaps one of those situations applies here.

[Abruptly disappears.]

RTMS to Tan Tenovo

So not only am I still on the radio, but I officially* have the #1 bicycle-themed show in New York City in the coveted 10am Monday time slot!

*[Disclaimer: when I say "officially" I mean I've decided this must be true.]
Furthermore, I've asked WBAI to make it available as a podcast, but until that happens all shows are archived on their website, and you can also listen to this morning's episode right here.

Thank you for bearing with me while I explore the antiquated medium that is terrestrial radio, because blogs weren't outdated enough.

Speaking of this blog, obviously Rip Torn (or, more accurately, his mugshot) emerged as sort of an unofficial logo for it during its heyday:


Here's the story of how that happened.

Anyway, owing to this association, a number of people were compelled to notify me through various channels of Rip Torn's recent passing, even though it's 2019, we all have phones now, and on top of that I spend a lot of time on Twitter, which means I find out when famous people die immediately, just like you do.  Still, I can't deny that his death does represent the end of an era as far as this blog is concerned, even if I did think he was already dead, which I suppose also says a lot in and of itself.  Indeed, it was on Wednesday, June 13th, 2007 that I hit the "publish" button on my very first blog post, and here we are 12 years later, my posts serving now largely to point you towards my other outlets, including my Outside column, and the Bike Forecast, and of course now my radio show.  All of this is to say that in the wake of Rip Torn's death I did take a moment or two to reflect on the fact that I arrived upon the scene an upstart anonymous bike blogger with a cutting sense of humor, and I'm now an an overexposed bloviator who halfheartedly entertains the anecdotes of people who call into radio shows and who can't even get upset about people who salmon in the bike lane anymore.  (I really can't.)

In other words I couldn't be happier with the way things have turned out.

Speaking of my erstwhile sobriquet (that being RTMS, or "Rip Torn's Mug Shot,") not too long ago it gave way to "Tan Tenovo," which of course refers to the unintentionally comic rendering of my bike's make and model on ticket I got while riding my erstwhile Renovo over a year ago:



Well, I pleaded guilty to the alleged offense, and it now occurs to you that I'm remiss in reporting to you that on Friday, July 5th I appeared in traffic court on Fordham Road in the Bronx to mount my defense.  Given that this was right in the middle of a long holiday weekend I admit I had hopes that the ticketing officer would be a no-show, but show he did, and presumably everyone there in the courtroom had felt the sting of his ticket-writing pen.  (I'm assuming I was the only cyclist there, but I don't know for sure, since I was the second person called and I left immediately after the proceedings, as you will soon read.)

After the judge dismissed the first defendant's case due to what seemed to be sloppy note-taking on the part of the officer, he then called me to the stand.  Haltingly, the officer read from his notes, explaining that he had been driving behind a motorist (he kept calling me "motorist") who did not stop for a red signal.  So he stopped said motorist-er, cyclist-in a safe location and duly summonsed him. 

Now, I should point out that I have no recollection of what color the light was, for the simple reason that I didn't look.  I was fresh off of negotiating a very tricky stretch of road, and I was almost home, and as I approached the intersection in question my priorities were as follows:

Get home safelyNot inconvenience any pedestriansGet home safelyIn light of this, as I approached the intersection in question, I saw there were no pedestrians in or near the crosswalk, nor were there any motor vehicles approaching.  And so I made a right turn--on what, according to the officer, was a red light.
That's when I heard the blip of sirens, and next thing I knew I was proffering my ID.
Anyway, as the officer recounted this, I realized I didn't have much of a defense, since if he had in fact been right behind me I couldn't very well claim he didn't see what color the light was.  Therefore, when it came my turn to question the officer, out of pure desperation I opened up a line of interrogation about the configuration of the street.  Specifically, the officer could not say whether there was or wasn't a bike lane on the street on which I was riding (there was), which confirmed my own suspicion that the NYPD are physically unable to see bike lanes, and which would explain why the precinct in which I was ticketed has issued zero (0) tickets for parking in bike lanes since 2018.  I then introduced a new line of questioning about why he didn't use his siren to go through the red light I had supposedly run, but the judge was unmoved--in fact, more than that, he was annoyed.  Swiftly, he found me guilty, and ultimately I alighted back onto Fordham Road $190 poorer.
On the way home, it occurred to me that losing in traffic court is almost exactly like getting dropped from a bike race: you feel embarrassed, you're out a bunch of money, and you keep going over what you might have done differently.  In any case, in retrospect it was all worth it just to hear the officer testify in court that I had been riding a Tan Tenovo bicycle, which gave me a secret little thrill.
Moving on, this weekend I got to spend a little more time on the Jones LWB Plus Complete:


As I mentioned back on July 4th, I'd been forming the impression that the LWB is sort of the galloping horse to the SWB's wild boar, and my last ride only reinforced this notion.  While I was less inclined to change lines on the LWB, there was also less need to do so, since it rolls so easily over roots and rocks.  And inasmuch as I'm a two-wheels-on-the-ground rider more than I am a throw-the-bike-around rider (or, if you want to get technical, a "woosie") I'd say at this point I'm partial to the LWB. 

Then again, I'm the guy who's been commuting on a State Core millennial special:


Call it a midlife crisis, but I've been enjoying this bike (except for the Vans grips, which feel like someone standing on your hands while wearing a pair of vans), and I'm also still pleased with the Two Wheel Gear briefcase:


I'm pretty sure that every single street in the Bronx is currently being resurfaced, and if this thing can stay securely on the rack through all of that than I suspect it can handle pretty much anything.

New Radio Show! And More Of The Rigorous Product Testing For Which I Am Famous!

Firstly, I was on the radio again this morning (I have my own radio show now in case you've been avoiding me lately) and you can listen to it...

...right HERE!
I recommend you do, too, because it's a very exciting time here in New York City and I talk about it all.  Mainly, drivers have been killing cyclist at an alarming rate, and in response the NYPD has announced they'll be cracking down on the most dangerous driver infractions.  In practice, this basically means they've been running Citi Bikers off the road "for [their] safety:"

#NYPD run over #nyc #bicycle to stop them from running a red light ton”prevent reckless driving.” pic.twitter.com/AITjqNwYiZ— Garvey Rich (@Garvey_Rich) July 5, 2019

As well as blasting Vision Zero messages out of parked vans:

Oh yeah, they'll have this cyclist death problem licked in no time. pic.twitter.com/HcKajHibT0— Bike Snob NYC (@bikesnobnyc) July 8, 2019

So yeah, as you can see, things are going just great on this end.

Secondly, speaking of my radio show, it means that for the first time in awhile I have to commute again just like the rest of you schmucks.  Granted, it's only once a week, but in my defense I've grown weak and soft and could not possibly be expected to commute five days a week at this point in my life.  Indeed, as the World's Greatest Living Cycling Writer (And Broadcaster) I need to be incubated as much as possible with my brain soaking in Palmolive and the comforts of home at arm's length at all times.

Still, my one (1) commuting day does involve riding the nearly 20 miles each way between the Bronx and Brooklyn, and so when a marketing person reached out to me and asked me if I wanted to try some bikey bags I readily accepted.  See, now that I'm a broadcaster, I have to travel with my laptop and a voice recorder just in case and of course my horns and whoopee cushions and other assorted novelty noisemakers so I can make wacky sounds while I'm on the air.

Anyway, the bikey bags in question are from a Canadian company called "Two Wheel Gear."  And the bags I got are this one:


And this one:


Both of which attach to your bicycle rack pannier-style by means of this clip system that works really well:


Basically you hook the black clips onto your rack, then you engage the red clip with your thumb, then you're ready to go.

Anyway, lately I've been commuting on my Milwaukee, but for various reasons I won't bore you with I decided to test the bags with the State Core-Line fixie Bicycling asked me to write about back in May:


At this point in my life I'm just too old and dorky to care about how...well, dorky I may look riding a circa-2007 Fixed Gear Gallery entry come to life.  Anyway, it's a fun bike, it's got eyelets for a rear rack, and sometimes you just need a no-frills bike you can ride in sneakers.  Also, I have to admit that if I see yet another fucking earth tone gravel bike I'm going to puke, so in a way riding a mail-order fixie with white rims is my own personal act of rebellion.

In any case, yesterday I finally got around putting a rack on the State, which was a straightforward affair other than the fact that I had to file down the very bottoms of the rack stays a few millimeters to clear the great big integrated washers on the rear axle nuts.  After mounting both bags on the bike I decided I liked the profile of the briefcase better, and so that's what I used. 

Oh, and naturally it was raining this morning, which meant I got to use the rain cover that comes with the bag:


Here's the bag without the cover:


Now I should say that a bike like this--short wheelbase, lots of toe overlap, etc.--isn't ideal for using with panniers.  If you're going to load a bike up you want some stability.  (I was once ejected from the

Bike repair essentials (tube, patches, tire levers, mini pump, multi tool)Laptop and power cable (I've gone from a MacBook to a Chromebook and I haven't looked back)Phone chargerVoice recorder just in caseWindbreaker just in caseExtra t-shirt just in caseU-lockAnd I think that about covers it.
Oh, and the clip system was indeed highly convenient, and disengaging the bag was (don't type snap don't type snap) ...a snap:

And, most importantly, it rained pretty much the whole way there and about half the ride back home, and my cheap Chromebook and everything else stayed perfectly dry.

So there you go.

Durability and so forth remains to be seen, and I haven't tried the backpack, but so far the briefcase is promising.

Oh, and I was also wearing the shorts Outlier sent me way back in 2009:


I hadn't worn them years, but this morning I mended a tear in the crotch seam and put them back into service, and I kind of feel like a schmuck for waiting this long because they're pretty comfy.

And they still had sand in the pockets!

New Outside Column And More Test Bike Hijinx!

Happy Birthday to Canada's addled downstairs neighbor!


Basically, Canada's just trying to live its life, while we're down here banging on the ceiling with a broomstick.

So why am I popping in during this auspicious holiday?  Well, firstly I figured I'd let you know my new Outside column is up:


Basically it's time to move past the "here's a new bike lane" phase and into the "here's a bold new policy that's going to dramatically reduce the number of cars and trucks on the streets" phase.

Secondly, remember how yesterday I took a ride on the Jones LWB?


Well, today I took the exact same ride, only on the Jones SWB:


And when I say exact I really mean it.  Not only did I leave at the same time as yesterday, but I also wore the same jorts!

So what did these two rides reveal?  Well, the SWB is indeed a more nimble and playful bike, whereas the LWB is smoother and more stable.  Going up steep climbs, taking tight turns, and riding smooth, undulating sections of trail is a bit more fun on the SWB, whereas riding over logs and rough patches is a bit easier on the LWB.  At the same time, it's not like one does a certain thing that much better than the other, so while it all comes down to preference it's also not like you can really go wrong.

Or, if you prefer overblown bike review metaphors, look at it this way:

The LWB is like galloping through the woods on a horse, while the SWB is like ripping through the woods on a wild boar.  On one you're sitting higher up and stepping over everything with grace, while on the other you're closer to the ground and being led by your snout--and I mean that in the best possible way, except that you will occasionally thwack your pendulous boar testis on a root or rock, since as we established yesterday the SWB is more prone to pedal strike.

All of the above is a bit unfair however, because as I mentioned the differences between them are ultimately not that stark, and the two bikes overlap way more than they don't.

So which would I choose?  After all, Jones isn't going to let me hang onto two bikes forever.  Well, yesterday I thought it would be the LWB, but after today I'm less certain, though I am very slightly still leaning that way since I do like the more generous proportions of the LWB and I also value my testis.

But it ain't over 'til the wild boar squeals.

I Ride Test Bikes So You Don't Have To

As I've said many times before, living in New York City's only mainland borough has two significant advantages:

1) When the glaciers melt the rest of you suckers will all be underwater and my home will be worth millions;

B) I can easily do a dirt ride in the same amount of time the rest of you suckers spend doing laps in Central and Prospect Parks.

Insofar as B) is concerned, I did just that earlier this morning, and was able to take in healthy slices of both Sprain Ridge Park and the Old Croton Aqueduct trail before many of my neighbors had even withdrawn their MetroCards.  And of course I did so on the new Jones LWB:


Unlike my last foray on this bike, this route is one I've ridden on the SWB many, many times, and so I was able to make a more direct comparison between the two bicycles.  While I still plan to undertake some back-to-back rides, my first impression was that the SWB is a slightly "rowdier" bicycle in that it sort of encourages you to lift the wheels up and throw it around, despite its heft.  The LWB on the other hand feels smoother and more genteel, and while I was less inclined to throw it around I also didn't really need to since it rolls over rocks and logs so easily.

But while I would not characterize any of the aforementioned differences as earth-shattering, there is one other area in which they do seem to differ fairly significantly, and that is ground clearance.  As I've mentioned, my only complaint about the SWB in a mountain bike capacity is that it is prone to pedal strike--I mean I can totally deal with it, but it is a factor here in the land of roots and rocks.  Alas, I only had time to ride a portion of Sprain Ridge Park this morning, but it does seem that the LWB is better in this regard.  Furthermore, when I got back home I performed a highly scientific test by placing the bikes next to each other with the cranks in the vertical position:


Were the cranks perfectly vertical?  Were the bikes even standing perfectly upright?  I have no idea.  However, based on this cursory comparison it looks like the LWB was almost a pedal's thickness more clearance than the SWB.

The chainring also appears to be quite a bit higher, which would stand to reason because even disregarding the geometry differences the SWB has a 32-tooth chainring and the LWB has a 30-tooth:


Again, standing the bikes next to each other for two seconds is not really the basis for drawing conclusions, and more trail time will reveal just how much of a factor any increased ground clearance is, but so far I do prefer the LWB in that department.

As for smooth dirt and pavement riding where clearance is not a factor, the LWB also feels a bit more road bike-like, most likely due to its proportions.  Regardless, what both bikes have in common is that they totally negate any desire I may have felt in the past for a "gravel" bike.  The fact is that between a regular road bike for full-on road riding and a Jones for everything else you're totally covered without sacrificing anything.  Oh sure, I suppose if you're an ultra-competitive Gravel Fred you might want a crabon pebble chariot with drop bars and a flat-back positioning and all that stuff, but barring that a bike like this is ideal for everything from a mellow mixed-terrain ramble to full-on trail riding.  (Plus you can carry all your worldly possessions on it, which quite frankly I'll probably never, ever do.)

Anyway, having typed all that, I reserve the right to flip-flop pending the completion of back-to-back identical rides on both bicycles.  So far the only thing I'm completely sure of is you can't go wrong with either.