Lisa Batya Feld's Blog, page 16

Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving, guys! May you have more than you need, and wonderful people to share it with, today and all year.

And now, off to celebrate with my wonderful family around the traditional Thanksgiving salmon. :)

Flashback

I just googled myself for the first time in a long time and was really surprised by what came up (I used my middle name too, as that generally cuts out random references to other Lisas). A story I'd published years ago is now available online, and apparently another story of mine earned me an offhand mention in the Year's Best Fantasy and Horror for 2003, which is pretty cool. The story's good to my eyes, if a little underdeveloped; I can see the bones of the kind of writing I do now underlying it. It's just strange for me to encounter a story I wrote ten years ago and published five years ago, see that it's chugging along with a life of its own. It feels like meeting an old friend unexpectedly in a coffeeshop, that flash of surprise, delight, and curiosity.

Two days and counting

I'm moving into the new digs on Saturday, but I got to pick up the keys today. I was a bit nervous, in part because I've had two months of waiting and second-guessing my decision, but also because this complex (like many in Durham) has a showroom model but will not let you see the actual apartment you're trying to rent. Lots of anxiety about whether the real thing would measure up.

But I opened the door, came inside, and thought, "This is lovely." Then I walked out on the balcony and thought, "I could sit here for the next four hours, watch the sun go down and the stars come out." This feels right. It feels like home.

Now I just have to haul thirty boxes, put together the bookshelves, and kasher the kitchen. Thank goodness for friends...

Raaaaaiiiiinnnn....

Wishing everyone in the path of the hurricane a safe and uneventful weekend, and I'm looking forward to hearing from you guys on the other side. My phone is on the fritz this morning, so if you can't reach me that way, don't worry. I'll post online when I can to say I'm fine.

The NPR top 100

Snagged from snycock , because I'm curious how I measured up. I've read only 39 (not including incomplete series)!

NPR's list of the 100 top science fiction and fantasy books (bold if I've read, underline if I've partially read, italics if I'd like to read)

1. The Lord Of The Rings Trilogy, by J.R.R. Tolkien
2. The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy, by Douglas Adams
3. Ender's Game, by Orson Scott Card
4. The Dune Chronicles, by Frank Herbert (Read the first a few times, but just couldn't get into the second.)
5. A Song Of Ice And Fire Series, by George R. R. Martin (only ever read the first book, but I'm starting to feel like I should give this series another shot!)
6. 1984, by George Orwell
7. Fahrenheit 451, by Ray Bradbury
8. The Foundation Trilogy, by Isaac Asimov
9. Brave New World, by Aldous Huxley
10. American Gods, by Neil Gaiman
11. The Princess Bride, by William Goldman
12. The Wheel Of Time Series, by Robert Jordan
13. Animal Farm, by George Orwell
14. Neuromancer, by William Gibson
15. Watchmen, by Alan Moore
16. I, Robot, by Isaac Asimov
17. Stranger In A Strange Land, by Robert Heinlein
18. The Kingkiller Chronicles, by Patrick Rothfuss
19. Slaughterhouse-Five, by Kurt Vonnegut
20. Frankenstein, by Mary Shelley
22. Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep?, by Philip K. Dick
23. The Handmaid's Tale, by Margaret Atwood
24. The Dark Tower Series, by Stephen King
25. 2001: A Space Odyssey, by Arthur C. Clarke
26. The Stand, by Stephen King
27. Snow Crash, by Neal Stephenson
28. The Martian Chronicles, by Ray Bradbury
29. Cat's Cradle, by Kurt Vonnegut
30. The Sandman Series, by Neil Gaiman
31. A Clockwork Orange, by Anthony Burgess
32. Watership Down, by Richard Adams
32. Starship Troopers, by Robert Heinlein
33. Dragonflight, by Anne McCaffrey
34. The Moon Is A Harsh Mistress, by Robert Heinlein
35. A Canticle For Leibowitz, by Walter M. Miller
36. The Time Machine, by H.G. Wells
37. 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea, by Jules Verne
38. Flowers For Algernon, by Daniel Keys
39. The War Of The Worlds, by H.G. Wells
40. The Chronicles Of Amber, by Roger Zelazny
41. The Belgariad, by David Eddings
42. The Mists Of Avalon, by Marion Zimmer Bradley
43. The Mistborn Series, by Brandon Sanderson
44. Ringworld, by Larry Niven
45. The Left Hand Of Darkness, by Ursula K. LeGuin
46. The Silmarillion, by J.R.R. Tolkien
47. The Once And Future King, by T.H. White
48. Neverwhere, by Neil Gaiman
49. Childhood's End, by Arthur C. Clarke
50. Contact, by Carl Sagan
51. The Hyperion Cantos, by Dan Simmons
52. Stardust, by Neil Gaiman
53. Cryptonomicon, by Neal Stephenson
54. World War Z, by Max Brooks
55. The Last Unicorn, by Peter S. Beagle
56. The Forever War, by Joe Haldeman
57. Small Gods, by Terry Pratchett
58. The Chronicles Of Thomas Covenant, The Unbeliever, by Stephen R. Donaldson
59. The Vorkosigan Saga, by Lois McMaster Bujold
60. Going Postal, by Terry Pratchett
61. The Mote In God's Eye, by Larry Niven & Jerry Pournelle
62. The Sword Of Truth, by Terry Goodkind
63. The Road, by Cormac McCarthy
64. Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell, by Susanna Clarke
65. I Am Legend, by Richard Matheson
66. The Riftwar Saga, by Raymond E. Feist
67. The Shannara Trilogy, by Terry Brooks (In my defense, I was 13.)
68. The Conan The Barbarian Series, by R.E. Howard
69. The Farseer Trilogy, by Robin Hobb
70. The Time Traveler's Wife, by Audrey Niffenegger
71. The Way Of Kings, by Brandon Sanderson
72. A Journey To The Center Of The Earth, by Jules Verne
73. The Legend Of Drizzt Series, by R.A. Salvatore
74. Old Man's War, by John Scalzi
75. The Diamond Age, by Neil Stephenson
76. Rendezvous With Rama, by Arthur C. Clarke
77. The Kushiel's Legacy Series, by Jacqueline Carey
78. The Dispossessed, by Ursula K. LeGuin
79. Something Wicked This Way Comes, by Ray Bradbury
80. Wicked, by Gregory Maguire
81. The Malazan Book Of The Fallen Series, by Steven Erikson
82. The Eyre Affair, by Jasper Fforde
83. The Culture Series, by Iain M. Banks
84. The Crystal Cave, by Mary Stewart
85. Anathem, by Neal Stephenson
86. The Codex Alera Series, by Jim Butcher (How did this get on when the Dresden Files didn't?)
87. The Book Of The New Sun, by Gene Wolfe
88. The Thrawn Trilogy, by Timothy Zahn
89. The Outlander Series, by Diana Gabaldon
90. The Elric Saga, by Michael Moorcock
91. The Illustrated Man, by Ray Bradbury
92. Sunshine, by Robin McKinley
93. A Fire Upon The Deep, by Vernor Vinge
94. The Caves Of Steel, by Isaac Asimov
95. The Mars Trilogy, by Kim Stanley Robinson
96. Lucifer's Hammer, by Larry Niven & Jerry Pournelle
97. Doomsday Book, by Connie Willis
98. Perdido Street Station, by China Mieville
99. The Xanth Series, by Piers Anthony
100. The Space Trilogy, by C.S. Lewis

Well, I know what I'm going to do at Barnes and Noble today! And as I attempt to earn my proper geek cred, which of the books I didn't mark do you think I should try?

New definitions of need

I'm taking care of my friends' cat while they're away on a month's vacation, and Dixon is both incredibly loving and incredibly needy. He needs to be petted the entire time I'm home and awake, which is by turns endearing and annoying. More to the point, he goes on hunger strikes unless I pet him the whole time he eats. He won't eat while I'm at work. He won't even eat if I'm petting him while eying a magazine. Even if I pay him my full attention, he'll eat a few mouthfuls and then run away and look at me, needing me to invite him back, needing to know that I really want him to eat. It kind of reminds me of how, when I was a kid, I needed my parents to say they wanted to give me my Friday night blessing; I needed to know I was really welcome. Which helps me be more sympathetic to the cat; I know what it feels like to want that reassurance.

What this means is that for fifteen minutes every morning and every evening, I need to stand by the food bowl and stroke the cat and make eye contact with him. And for someone who has never gotten the hang of meditation, standing and focusing on my breathing in a state of relaxed attention and compassion is a very good thing on more than one level.

Reminding myself of what's important

It's funny, I keep thinking of myself as this antisocial wallflower, despite three years in Colorado to the contrary. Final nail in that coffin: I was out to lunch with coworkers yesterday and ran into someone from the Raleigh synagogue who reminded me of my promise to read Torah soon and suggested three people I should hang out with, two of whom I already knew. Just a lovely encounter. As she walked away, my coworker said, "How is it that I've been here two months longer than you and you already have so many friends?"

I am so incredibly lucky to have Betsy and her family in my life, and even luckier that they've opened their home up to me in this beautiful way. I have made friends with three local rabbis and hope to make friends with a fourth tomorrow morning. My friend Jen from Sentinel fandom has proven to be even more awesome in real life than she is online. And that's not to mention friends from synagogue and lovely coworkers and bosses. It's such an embarassment of riches. And I'm already thinking of how I can get a futon couch so I can coax my friends from New York, Massachusetts, and Colorado to come down and see me.

I can't believe it's only week four! A quick status update: I am loving the new car, and I've already put 700 miles on it (only 200 of which can be credited to my getting lost -- thank you, GPS!) I have chosen an apartment that I'm pretty happy with; it's in a pretty area, 1/2 hour from work and very close to both downtown Durham and Chapel Hill. Sadly, I can't move in until mid-September, but I am very very lucky that Betsy is willing to put me up for that long. Her husband, Charlie, teases me in true big brother fashion, and her little boys are the best part of my day. I get to pretend I'm a lobster, and chase them around the house, and wrestle on the kitchen floor. Also, Daniel knows more about dinosaurs than most paleontologists. Life is intense, but very, very good.

New Car!

After a solid week of searching, I finally have my first car. It's a silver 2005 Honda Civic with 50k miles and a 6-year extended warranty, so I'm feeling pretty comfortable with it. So the first day I had it, I drove -- guess where? -- to Barnes and Noble for a latte and a book. Kind of trippy to have to remember where I parked, and scary and wonderful to be driving solo after all this training.

Next steps are to get an apartment and to get an NC license, which requires retaking the damn written test. Ngh. Plodding along...

Threshold to adult living

I had such a lovely send-off from FoCo: hanging out with friends at Barnes and Noble, lots of hugs, one last taste of Old Town with Trai, watching Game of Thrones with Stephanie, and finally a home-cooked meal with Gil and Adele on their patio, watching the sun set beside the Poudre trail. Couldn't have asked for lovelier memories of lovelier people.

I'm *really* glad I asked Oxford for time to do the move in a good way because the Research Triangle is way different from anywhere I've lived and it's taking some figuring out. I'm staying with a childhood friend, Betsy, and even though we haven't spoken in 20 years, we're getting on like a house on fire. So we're working our way through finding my first car and finding an apartment in the area where I'll be happy. (Happiness being a juggling act of decent commute, affordable apartment, close to interesting things and people, not close to scary neighborhoods, etc. In some ways, Manhattan felt easier to figure out on that score!)

It feels kind of bizarre to me because for these two weeks I am very much in transition. When I finish, I'll have a job, a car, an apartment, and the start of my first real furniture -- a new and heightened sense of adulthood -- but right now I'm between roles, not knowing anything, very dependent on others for help, and trying my best to make good decisions that are going to affect me greatly for the next few years. I have faith that it's all going to come together -- it's only day 2 and we've made significant progress -- but I'll be very glad when it's all figured out, especially if I figure it all out in time to give myself a bit of real vacation before I have to start work.

Relativity

For some reason, everything that should have taken an insane amount of time today has flown by and everything I thought would be fairly easy was extremely complicated.

Moving all my stuff (except two small boxes I'm saving for the end) took an hour. An hour! My friend Steph showed up in a pickup truck bigger than God, we loaded it up, and when we got to the post office, they let us park by the loading dock and use the dollys and they had two postal workers divvy up the work. An hour's work and $580 to move across the country. Wow.

Getting rid of my mattress, on the other hand, is a huge production. I've put out ads and gotten no takers, and apparently used furniture stores and donation centers in this state *can't* take mattresses anymore. So tomorrow will involve calls to the dump and the neighborhood trash service.

And backing up all my computer files onto my old spare flash drive caused nine computer crashes and some wonky files. There's a reason I stopped using that thing. So the epic saga continues, but I should finish everything just in time to fly out of here on Sunday.