Jude Stringfellow's Blog, page 37

Let God Sort it Out

     I'm really angry right now. I think recognizing that is important. I'm not happy, and we don't always have to have that particular emotion to survive or even to thrive. I'm really angry. I have a right to be so, and it's OK if I am. Again, I believe having the withal to know this is good.  I was employed from Feb. to Apr. of this year, and I won't add it to my resume because the man I worked for is unethical, he's a liar, a cad, and he doesn't deserve to even be able to say he was my employer. He's perhaps the worst, or at least one of the worst, employers I've ever had.  We had a hearing today, a Tribunal Appeal really; he had failed to show up for the first hearing, and they gave him a 2nd opportunity. He used that opportunity to lie about me. I hate that.

    After the hearing, I wanted to punch him so hard in the balls. I really did. I had to refocus, rethink, meditate, and get back on track. I was the one-off track at that point. I was the one who needed to be realigned. He doesn't belong to me. His spirit doesn't belong to me. I am responsible for myself, not that man. I have two choices at this point; I can let that man hurt me further, or I can pray and get back in with what I know to be right. I will pray not only for myself, but for my former employer, who calls himself a Christian, but obviously falls so far from the mark, he needs God's help. I won't limit God on how that happens anymore than I would tell God how to fix my problems. I let them go! I place them (and that former employer) at God's feet.

    I didn't want to be kind. I didn't want to be nice. I didn't want to remotely seem cordial, but I am not my own. I was bought with a price; the blood of Christ. I am not in charge. I am not the one who decides. What I do matters; because others will see God in me or they won't. I want them to see God in me. I want them to come to Him because they trust what they saw in me. It's not how my human nature wants to respond; but thank you Jesus, I am not alone. I have the Holy Spirit in me literally restraining me from the evil I could do if left on my own.

    When God says to trust Him with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding, that is what He's talking about. We aren't to do what we want to do, what we think is best, what we could do that would cause as much damage; we are to let go of the hurt, the pain, and the damage that was done to us. Let God do His miracles without our interruptions. We really don't know what is best; we just want to do what we want to do. NO. We must not let that happen; it never turns out for the best. NEVER.

    The rest of that verse says He will set the path straight. I need that. That's what I need. I need a good straight path right now. The good news is I'm not in charge; ice cream helps too. God made it; it's good. This is me....letting go.

Photo Credit: ThermoWorks.com

PINBALL (100% DONE) and BEING PUBLISHED!!

 So, I was going to go through it 3x before sending it off, but I didn't need to. I went through it (mostly) as I was writing it. I'm finding now, that when I write I pay a bit more attention to the grammar bars, the little blue bars under the wrong word(s), and the red bars, telling me I flat misspelled something. I keep my eyes peeled for certain patterns. What I didn't do, and I probably should, is go through the book to see how many times I said "a bit" because I know it's going to be a bit too...well, you know, too much. I say it too often. I also say "so as" quite a lot as well.

    When I write, I do so as if I'm talking to you face-to-face. I don't watch my grammar, I don't know if I'm spelling every word correctly or not. I don't watch where I break my paragraphs, and that's something I need to watch more when I write as well. I don't like to have a lot of words bunched together. I like paragraphs on a page. They just look nice. Maybe that's just me. I don't know.

    "Pinball" sounds like a super fun, light-hearted title, so to be sure and get my point across, I used an ominous cover with darker tones and a mesmerizing shaky image; it's not supposed to be fun....it's supposed to be suspenseful. I hope I managed to do that. I find myself not going into enough detail, but I need to. I need to add 1000 adjectives but I think I did OK. I'll find out soon enough. I'm going to read the book in its entirety tomorrow, and Sunday. I'll look for issues I can change and when they send it back to me to proof, I will have already proofed it, so I can send it right back to be uploaded and published. 

    I know I should have waited until I did that, but there are so many things that will be happening this weekend I didn't know if I would have the chance to read it or not. After I sent it up, I realized I would have had the time; there you go. I'm OK with it. I can either fix it or let it slide. What do you want to bet I choose to fix it? I know me. I'll fix it. I can't fix it too much because the cover is made for a book with 395 pages and the book has 398. It's literally right on the money. Tight, but not bad. 

    This is the first of several sequels. I wanted to be sure and have at least these two out by now, and I'll write two more before Christmas. I'm starting "1211" on Monday, and hope to have it submitted by 10/22. I'll get it published by Halloween probably. Then, I'll write "Stollen", probably starting it around 11/2 or so, and finishing by Thanksgiving. It will be loaded and ready to go for the Christmas holidays. That way, if people want to buy all four books for their loved ones, well, there you go! Feel no obligation, but yeah, that would be really great.

    I began writing "Pinball" on July 22, but I stopped writing it on July 24, so I could write another book, a romance novel titled "Edinburgh".  I picked Pinball back up on September 19 and finished it today. So, in keeping with the timing, or the time it takes to write a 395-page book with about 86,000 words; we'll say it's about 12 days and then you wait about that long before Ingram Sparks gets around to publishing it. Longer...much longer for "Edinburgh", and I have no idea why. I'm still waiting on it.

    "1211"  will be a fun more quirky type of murder book. Someone died, but he died a very long time ago. This one is a relaxing fun giggling sort of mystery book I'm putting together to showcase a time in my life when I was old enough to move out of my parents' house, but I had no idea what to do when life hit me in the face. I lived in a really old apartment building close to downtown, OKC. It had 8 individual flats inside of it; and all of them, including mine, were occupied with the strangest group of tenants you can imagine...fun times. 

    Catch you on the other side to let you know how that goes. 

Photo Credit: ME!

PINBALL (86% written) Woo Hoo!! So Close.

     I really could have finished writing the book today, but I am doing other things in my life that warrant me being present, so I decided to finish the book tomorrow. I'll wait until Saturday (the next day) to write to say how it went and what I'm doing next to complete it. Just finishing the writing doesn't mean the book is ready; oh no. It's got to be gone over, fluffed, stuffed, and formatted. Then, and only then, can it be DONE.

    I'm 86% done now, meaning, I've written 74000 words of the expected 86000 words. I'll do the rest tomorrow, and then I'll start the really fun part. First, I go through the book for spacing, font, and size issues. If anything is out of place, not the right size, or the right font, I fix it. I justify the sides of all the text and I make sure the indentions are in place, the quotes are where they need to be, and all quotes are in italics. That's the first step. 

    I go through to make sure there are no spelling or grammar issues. I can't catch them all, but I do my best, I promise. I do this before I fluff and stuff, and I sort of fluff and stuff at the same time (to be honest) so that I'm working the entire book at the same time. I'm reading it, adding to it, going over it, and just making sure it all makes sense.

    Then, after I get all the points added from the notes I took along the way, I go back over it ONE MORE TIME to be sure it makes sense, that I said what I wanted to say, and I take out things that may be too hard to read. I can read tougher things than some. I can't watch it, but I can read it and I can write it. I'm not sure why that is. I get grossed out if I see it. I couldn't watch the movie about my books probably, just saying.

    Then...I format the book! YEA. When I do that I check the margins, and make it look like I want it to look. I add the pages, and I add the headers. I wish I could figure out how to start the pages at chapter one, but I can't, I've tried. I've watched the videos, it's not that big of a deal, really, but yeah, something I wish I could do. At least I know how to add cool fonts and all that - - woot.

    When I format it, and it all looks good, I save it as a PDF and I prepare the cover in Canva. HOWEVER, this time around the cover is already made. I did it already, and I'm pretty stoked about that fact. I'll format the book, make sure it looks great and probably by Monday or Tuesday I'll upload both the PDF interior and the cover, and then it's a waiting game. I'm still waiting for "Edinburgh" to be published. I sent it off on September 7, and I've not gotten it back so I can approve it yet. That is so not right. Oh well, we'll hope they can get their act together soon. I hate waiting.

    I'll keep you posted. YEA!!

Photo Credit: Unknown

PINBALL (The Book...75% DONE) Chapter 24.

     I was pretty excited today to see that the book cover that I had created for the book "Pinball" was in fact ready to go. I had taken the time maybe two months ago, to make the book cover and save it. I had to assume (as I do) that there would be about 380 pages in the book and there actually will be. I'm writing the book in the same type of style as I did "Murder Book", as this book is the sequel.

        I've just finished Chapter 24, and there will be 30 or 31 chapters. I have outlined them, and I'm being really picky now about what I add and what I write. I only have about 20,000 more words to write, which if I have 2500 words per chapter is 8 chapters, so it's going to be something like that. We'll see. Chapter 24 has about 2200 whereas other chapters in the book are rocking in the 3000-3500 words; so it's never a gimme. I don't know exactly what I'll end up saying until I start writing.

    Today, I needed a nudge so I watched a couple of Perry Mason episodes. I don't take the words from the show, as much as the nuance. Perry walks across the floor, crossing in front of Paul. He lights his cigarette, stopping in the middle of the action showing concern on his face for something. OK, I can use that. I mimic it and put it into my own words, choosing which characters to cross over, which to light a cigar, pop open a can, or something; then, in the middle of the action the pause to show that a thought has hit them between the eyes.

    This method opens up another route for my characters to act, play off each other, talk, carry on or start a conversation. It's never one-sided; they choose to banter. They collectively communicate. Even the bad guys open their mouths and let things out so the reader knows what to expect. Right now I've hidden a man, he's about to die, or maybe he's already died and the killer will describe the pleasure he obtained in the process of taking the man's life. He's a psycho, the killer that is, not the other guy. He's really quite innocent. 

    I'm going to start adding my nouns and adjectives to many of the paragraphs this weekend. I think I'll fluff and stuff starting Saturday. This is Wednesday night, so I have about two more full days of writing, and by that I mean I can take all the time I want to, but I'll probably end up writing for two days. I'll fluff and stuff and then on Sunday I'll format the book before going over it ONE MORE TIME to be sure I've fixed all the boo-boos. I won't save it as a PDF until I feel I've made as many corrections as I need to.

    I really don't want to have to go back over the book after it's sent to the publisher. Edinburgh just about killed me. I sent the wrong file!! I sent the file that wasn't corrected and now I'm still waiting for them to release it so I can resubmit my last corrected file. DING AND DANG...this is a process. We all learn differently, and apparently, I need to freely flub up any number of times before I get it down to a science. I'm not there yet. It'll happen. By the time I write my 20th book, I think I'll have the secrets in place.

    The good news? "Pinball" is almost done.  This will allow me to start writing the more comical sequel to the Nick Posh Thrillers; "1211". It is pronounced Twelve-Eleven.  That's the address of the murder house; the one Nick almost rents for himself but realizes it's only a one-bedroom flat and he'll need two. It doesn't stop him from checking out the basement when asked to accompany a local surgeon who finds crime fascinating. There was an old rumor about the house his grandmother lives in; it can't be true, but he wants Nick to help him check it out. Oh my...it's true. There is a pile of rotten bones in the basement of 1211 N. Garvey. 

    Well, can't write that one until I finish this one. Two days....and then I guess I can start on the next one. Fun times!! I love my keyboard.

75% done - - two days. Yep. Two days.

Photo Credit: Dreamstime.com

We Were Kids! That's What We Did.

     I was talking to a Scottish friend of mine, he's a bit younger than I am, and we were playing the game TRADES.  When you play Trade or Trades, you say something or different about your life and then they say something different or strange about their life. It's fun. So, he's going on about when he was a kid, mind you, he's about 43 and I'm almost 62, he used to hang upside down on the limbs of the tree and try to catch another tree branch without falling to the ground. His friends and he would try to go as far as they could go without falling or touching the ground. I told him I absolutely understood. The ground is lava, after all. 

        When I told him I swallowed tadpoles on a dare, he wasn't sure what a tadpole was. I guess they have frogs in Scotland, but I don't think they call the baby wanna-be frogs "tadpoles". When I explained it to him he stared at me with both eyes as wide as they could be, and his mouth was gaping open much like you'd see on a trout fish...you know what I mean. He was dumbfounded. When I went a bit further and explained that we kids would walk barefoot for miles on the hot ground, popping tar bubbles on the way to the creek he again, had no idea what a tar bubble was. Really? Tar bubbles are the bubbles that form when the sun is beating down on the road that's just been given maintenance once over by the city crew team to fill in cracks. The tar gets hot, it bubbles up, and you pop the bubbles with your fingernails. Apparently, it doesn't get that hot in Scotland.

    After a few more exchanges I explained to him that our slides didn't have soft covers, and they emptied out onto the concrete playground, maybe onto pebbles, but never onto grass or something made of rubber that would have been beneficial. I told him the swings were mounted (sometimes) on the concrete too, and when you got dared to jump out of one you did it hoping to land on your feet because skinning your knees really hurt....really hurt. Again, with the popping eyes. 

    We drank out of the water hoses that were connected to our houses. We drank out of water hoses that were connected to other people's houses too. We jumped over fences that stood in the way of where we were going, and if someone (a neighbor) invited you into their house for dinner you called your mom to see if it was OK. You said Grace, you ate whatever was being served.  We didn't choose what we ate, we were kids. We didn't argue about it either, we were kids. We never cussed until we were old enough to do so, and if our parents popped us in the mouth for it, we understood. What a difference 18 years made; and a few thousand miles. He said he would have been mortified if his parents had slapped him across the face. Really? I guess I just thought that's what we deserved. They never did it if we were good. I know that much.

    We collected bottles from trashcans and from under things so we could haul them up to the grocery store and get a nickel for each one of them. If they were broken or cracked we didn't get the nickel. We took care of those bottles! We ate candy shaped like cigarettes and bubble gum that looked like pink, yellow, and green cigars. We popped open a bottle of root beer, which isn't beer at all, and we poured it over our ice cream. We still do that. We'd eat the bubble gum cigars and candy cigarettes if we could find them. 

    When I think about what I survived; all the dodgeball games, tag, Red-Rover, and that silly game called knuckles that boys always tried to get us to play, I think we may very well have a reason to stand up and refuse to do some of the stupid things our government and others who haven't been woken up at dawn by a lunatic mother singing "Rise and Shine and Give God the Glory!" That woman was pure bonkers! She redeemed herself a few minutes later every morning by cooking us a mess of bacon, eggs, biscuits, and chocolate gravy! God, let me be a kid again - - I don't want to party like it's 1999, I want to play, sleep, eat, and communicate like it's 1969 again. Please? 

    Give me that old-time religion. Give me the days when your grandmother said it wouldn't rain and it didn't matter one lick what the weatherman said, he didn't know as much as she did anyway. Give me the days when dogs ran the streets with or without collars and everyone knew which one belonged to you, your neighbor, or maybe someone on another block, but stray dogs were taken into houses and given a name. They weren't overbred to the point that millions of them had to be put down. Give me the times when a preacher was moral, and you could trust that what they preached was true. Give me the parents who aren't afraid to use a belt properly, then sit a kid down to explain what just happened and why it shouldn't happen again. Give me libraries where a kid at age 5 can walk in and "read" books by herself and not worry about anyone stealing her; and if she didn't wear her shoes into the place no one really talked about her or her family. 

    We were kids. We didn't know we were poor. We were kids. We had no idea what color someone else may have been or why they weren't the same color we were. We were kids. We knew when the street light came on, we were to go straight home...or call Mom to let her know where we were and when to expect us. I miss that. I suppose I'm blessed to be able to TRADE my stories with others. I like hearing about their lives as well. Maybe if we all played our cards right, we could go back to those better days, but something tells me we'll have to wait until Jesus turns HIS porch light on, but when He does....I'm going straight home! That much I know.

Photo Credit: Unknown (Twitter)

DISTRACTIONS!! (I have them)

     It is really very difficult to get into the writing process when the dog won't shut up. He's got this thing about wanting to mutilate the Amazon driver, the mailperson, and anyone who walks across the lawn, and yes, that includes every bird.  He's a mess, but I do love the guy. My daughter and I were just hanging out one day when I heard her oohing and awwwing from her room. She does that. She's an oooher. Anyway, so she's over there dying about something, and then she bounces into my room demanding that I drive her about 20 miles so she can pick up her new dog. What? What new dog? Do we really need another one? I mean, we had two.

    Hugo was about 8 weeks old or so, and he'd been dumped. People who dump dogs have a very very special place in Hell as far as I'm concerned. I'm not Jesus, but I think He may agree. Anyway, Hugo was an unnamed mutt but he had very specific traits and features that told the world his parents were predominantly large, black and tan, and most likely of the German Shepherd and Rottweiler sort. He's adorable. He only has one ear, and that may be why he was dumped. Who knows. We took him home with us; the foster parents were happy.

    Now, when I sit to write he decides to sound off. He's either pestering one or the other of the dogs we have, or he's messing around chasing one of the cats. He's up in the window bellowing, and now at 6 months old, he has the voice of his commanding parents. He's loud, he's strong, he's forceful. He's not alone in his means of keeping my mind from writing. There are other daily distractions as well. I can't fully sit down to write out three or four chapters when I know I have laundry to do. I can't just pop the clothes in the washer and be done with it, I have to carry them a good distance to the laundry room in our complex. I then wait 40 minutes, setting the timer, and I return to put the clothes in the dryer for 45 minutes. It's such a first-world issue, but it's still a bother.

    Today, I'm about to study the ins and outs of psychosis and bipolar disorders and compare them with schizophrenia because one of my characters has a dual diagnosis. Since the book takes place in 1930 I can't use the more modern terms or treatments. I have to do my due diligence and find out what he would have endured as a patient if he was ever caught and subjected to treatment. He may not be caught, he may just discuss it with his clinician and his behavior and outbursts then become a part of the brackish fabric of whatever he considers to be his life.

        That's my life today. I'm studying, reading, thinking, writing, working, cleaning, pounding on the dog a few times, and rescuing a cat or two. In other words, today is a very normal and typical day. I look forward to getting started on the three chapters I've planned to write, but to be honest, I can't do anything until I get the bad grape juice and soured yogurt out of the frig, and retrieve my laundry. I can't fold it right away, as I have dogs. They like to lay on it first, to be sure it doesn't attack me I suppose. Such good dogs.

PINBALL (54% Done) Woot!

 When I think about it, and you know I do, being more than 50% finished with a book means I'm on the back end. I'm leaving the forest rather than running into it. I'll still deal with the various trees, creeks, animals, and whatnot, but I am wrapping it up even as I'm making things make sense to the reader. 

    I love introducing new characters. A lot of the characters I write about will only be seen or heard in the chapter in which they are first discussed. You may never see or hear from them again, but they needed to be there when they were made public. You can't magically have something happen; people make the world go around and you need to connect an event with a person, not just have something happen.  Readers let you know fast if they are unhappy with your characters. My characters tend to have feelings, emotions, and backstories. I'll go back into the chapters and develop them even further during the fluff and stuff stage.

    Right now, I'm sitting at 54% finished if I am aiming for an 86,000-word book. I have just under 47,000 and things are heating up!! People are dying, people are being caught, people are running away, and others are simply taking their tea by the shores of the Great Lake, Lake Michigan. They have no idea what's going on right behind them. These are blissful moments to be cherished. 

    I wrote four chapters today and only hinted at a little lovemaking. There hasn't been any real sex in this book except when the bad guy does the self-loathing thing and I won't discuss that here; you'll have to read the book. I'm not happy about needing to write it, but it is a symptom of one of the manic disorders that the guy has; so yeah, it was needed. There will be sex though. I'm going to write it tomorrow actually. This will be as you may have suspected, between Nick and his fiance, or the woman he considers to be his wife, Elaine. They're really very much in love. I like them a great deal. They have a child together; he's adorable.

    I'm on Chapter 18 now, so I've got about 12 more to go. I keep my books around 30-32 chapters; I think Murder Book has 35, but this one will probably end up with about 30; unless I have to add something that makes it all make sense. I do that too. I'll throw in a chapter for the purpose of tidying up a few loose ends. Before I write the book entirely I write out what I think the chapters will have and I try really hard to keep the book on track - - not saying it always works. I need to go back over my Murder Book notes and see if I need to add things to this book that I forgot to include in the other. I do that too.

    Right now, I'm closing in on one of the killers. I think one will get away and live to tell about his exploits in another book - - maybe two....maybe three. I'll introduce other bad guys, more good guys, women and children, clerks, and doctors. I'll add police, librarians, and maybe even a Thanksgiving Dinner. You just may have to read a bit more to find out.  Someone in my neighborhood today asked me if I saw the OU game yesterday, and I have to admit, I'm a fan, but I don't spend time watching games anymore. I write. I don't watch television, I write. I could think of something to do other than write, but that doesn't make me anywhere near as happy as writing does, so I like to write. 

    I'm hoping to be hired this week by either an insurance firm where I can be an investigative claims analyst, or with an attorney where I'll do the same. I kind of hope it's the insurance company as the attorney is an individual guy and you never know what can happen if he dies -- I'd be out of work. I need more security than that, but I do like the guy. I like both of my would-be potential bosses. I even wrote one of them into the book - - I told him I would. He's a bad guy - - he loves it.   OK, well that's it, and I'll catch you later after I've tucked Nick and Elaine into their bed for a romp or two; maybe they'll bring little Alistair a kid sister or a little brother. He may like that.

Photo Credit: Adobe Stock www.adobestock.com 

PINBALL (Chapter 9 Finished) Carry On!

         Whenever I write a book I ask my friends and family to contribute to the work by giving me a few words to use; I offer them a thank you in the book for having done so. This time, boy oh boy, the words have been pouring in, and let me just say, if you read the book you'll have fun learning new words!!

     One of my friends suggested three really cool words and I thought long and hard about them in that they really sounded out there; where did she come up with these? I wanted to know. Turns out she found a really cool creative editorial about the game pinball and in the article, there were some gloriously wonderful words. I won't spoil it by telling you which ones she suggested, but it's really awesome that she took the time to go look up an article about what she thought the subject of the book was about!! LOL, jokes on her!! The reference to pinball the game, is used metaphorically because the mind is pinged and tossed around the brain at times in the psyche of two of the noted characters who are both murderers and both flat nutcases. 

    I've decided to talk about the game Pinball as well, but the thing is, the name Pinball without a hyphen (pin-ball) didn't come around until 1931, which may or may not be of any significance, but my book takes place in 1930. LOL...just one year before the game's name was given. Oh well, it's a novel, right? I can say pin-ball and be OK. I've decided to do that, but not change the title's punctuation. It will remain PINBALL. So there! I can do that. I have my creative license, and I am not afraid to use it.

    I've written nine chapters so far, and am about 28% finished if I have my goals set the same as I did with Murder Book and Of Kilted Pleasure. I think 86000 words is a good amount. I think it's a good goal to set. I have held and read both books, one being a 6x9 and the other being a 5x8. I like the shorter thicker book. I'm not just saying that. I do. I think the longer book is good, it's nice, but it's not as bookish to me. Maybe the "new" size is just too new. I prefer a Kindle, and I can buy the books soon for my Kindle, but until I get all of my books in Ebook format, they are going to be perfect bound paperbacks. All of the romances are 6x9 and all of the murder thrillers are 5x8. That's my own doing; no one is responsible, just me.

    Chapters 8 and 9 deal with the court cases of the Fiona Brown murder case as well as the cases brought to move the court on behalf of the People of Culloden who are being represented by an American. Chapter 7 reintroduces Posh's mother Ama and her love for her native land of Oklahoma. She and her friend Wilma discuss another very time-sensitive matter, the foreshadowing of the era of the Dust Bowl. While it didn't take place until about 1933-34, they saw signs of it in the earlier years, and Ama discusses this with her friend over tea. 

    Each chapter is laid out and planned before I write it, but I have to be honest, I will write out what I think is going to happen and then something takes place and my mind shoots off and I don't have much control over what comes out of my keyboard. Nope, not gonna lie. I could have 10 points to put into a chapter and hit only 2. When that happens I try to regroup for another chapter, but it's not likely to be the next chapter as I rarely write things in exact chronological order. I do skip around. I go from one country to the next, I go from one person to the next. I even change times, dates, and memories, you just never know. I regroup. That's the best I can do.

    Wayne Stringfellow (my dad) makes an appearance in this book, much like he did in the last. It's not really my dad, it's my dad's name. My dad was born in 1932, and he was born in Arkansas. The Wayne Stringfellow in the book is a lot like my dad, but he's in Scotland. They both worked/work for Western Union, but that's because I can do things like that. I like doing things like that in fact. If you know me, you'll see quite a few "hello" moments in my books. I like to give a nudge and I like to give a wink when it's possible.

    I will give you a spoiler alert now...there is sex in the book. I've already written one nasty ugly horrible scene that isn't fit to be printed. I know that sounds funny coming from the author, but it was a terrible decision that needed to be made. It's a scene where one of the murderers fights within his own mind, and he deals with the hatred he has for the other ego in a very physical way. Sorry, it's nasty. I could put a disclaimer in the front of the book saying it's for mature audiences. I may have to do that. I did research the material to be sure I wasn't way off in my writing. I'm not. I am in fact tame compared to some journalistic material I found. I ran across some testimony from the court(s) and they have to transcribe the words verbatim. I didn't do that. 

    Well, that's about all I have for you today. I'll write three more chapters tomorrow, two or three each day over the weekend. I think I'll be 50% done by Sunday. Pretty sure about that. I'm at 28% now. I think I'll have the book finished by October 2 or 3rd, and I'll take the 4th and 5th to review it before uploading it. I'll approve it around the 10th of October and start on the next novel in the series. LET ME TELL YOU...the next novel is the cat's meow! Wait, that's a spoiler. LOL. I can't wait to write it.

Photo Credit: Etsy.com

    

    

PINBALL (Chapter 5) Disorders

     Pinball is a psychosis-type killer thriller. There will be murder, there will be innuendo, there will be chase, and there will be loss of apprehension. Someone gets away with it; others do not. There will be times when the book explains mental illness and I have to tell the audience in a disclaimer that I am NOT a medical doctor. All of the information I'm writing about is gained and gathered from the internet. I will not blame anyone for any mishaps that may happen in terms of me not getting it 100% correct. It's a novel, folks. It's not meant to be taken as reality. You'd be surprised how often an author of fiction has to remind people of that fact.

    Chapter 5 already. Geez. I just got started. The first four chapters were literally catching people up who may not have read "Murder Book", as "Pinball" is the sequel. There will be more, and no doubt probably a lot more. I think I've got 9 planned so far in my head, but this is just Tuesday. I'm sure that will change by Friday. I'll be writing Nick Posh books for a while. I'm going to write other books in between them too. I have the "Of Kilted" sequels to write. There are two more books in that series. I seem to have started a romance series as well, which is interesting because the characters in one do not necessarily interact with the characters in the others. This is another series altogether. The first in that series is "Edinburgh".  

    I may have to write "Tulsa" and "Indy", maybe even "Spokane".  I love me some Spokane, Washington!!  Who knows, I may just end up liking all this romance writing, but I think I like the murder books best. I like studying about the ins and outs of murder, crime, the reasoning, and if you can get to it; the motive. People who kill are just flat-crazy; I admit that. There is still some sort of reason and with reason comes motive. They are not always the same.  The reason one may kill is insanity, but the motive is jealousy or envy. (in some cases, not all)

    Chapter 5 of my current book will see John Reid discussing his own mental dilemma with himself. He is also Walter Sanders. John Reid is a go-to name, not the one he was born with, but the one he gave to the other man living inside his brain. The thing is, John Reid won't even acknowledge Walter, but it's Walter who created Reid and allows him to live inside the same body and brain as himself. See the problem? Well, Sanders sees it, but Reid refuses to see it; and Sanders may decide to kill Reid to prove his point, but that won't happen until much later in the book - - oops...spoiler. (or is it?)

    I'll discuss what the doctors were doing to and with mental patients in 1930 both in the UK and the United States. I'll discuss the differences between hallucinations and daydreaming because there is a difference. I'll go over the nuances of delusional disorders which are not accompanied by hallucinations or thought disorders; Reid may have delusional disorders, but Walter certainly has a psychosis disorder which will need to be managed if they can catch him. He's killed before both as Reid and as Sanders. Do they need to hang the man twice? It is discussed.

    In 1930 the very idea of ridding someone of these problems was in the infancy stages, but there were dramatic and drastic steps being taken in the name of medicine that were shocking; literally. This too, will be discussed. The book is about two very separate and individual men, both with disorders, both with manic depression, and both with killer instincts, but they are not the same man - - one has a personality disorder where he knows another person's psyche lives within his head and the other man knows he is alone in his actions.  His diagnosis is more aligned with narcissistic behavior and grandiose delusional disorder in that he truly believes he is untouchable. Their worlds collide in the book.

    There will be fireworks. I can promise that.

Plans are Being MADE!!

     Gosh darn, I love me some plan-making. I am the biggest and most excited plan maker I know. My notes have notes. My plans have plans. I start planning before I plan so I can plan whatever it is that needs to be planned, but before I do that, I write notes about it. Yes, it is so true. My notes are there, ready to be written over again, so that they are nice and neat, so that they make more sense, and I can plan. 

    Do I overthink? Does a bear poop in the woods? Yes, I overthink. I am a master at it. Believe me. I will outthink you any day. Then, because I can, I will have multiple conversations about whatever it is that I'm overthinking, and I will include you in those conversations if you interrupt me and myself. When I say I have voices in my head I mean it's just me. I'm talking to myself and I'm also listening to myself, so please don't stop the process. We have to regroup at that point.

    I'm about to be hired by one of three insurance companies who are all trying to figure out where to put me. I have one that wants me to be an examiner, one that wants me to be an estimator and one that wants me to train customer service representatives. I'm just open to work, so the first one who pulls the trigger on the employment game gets me. Sorry, but I'm not going to hold out - - I'm going to go to work. All three jobs are from home, 100% remote, and that's a really good thing too because I'm going to make plans to move soon. Just as soon as I can really. I have to (a) be hired first, and (b) stay about 3 months so I can save up for the closing costs.

    Where will you move? Scotland? Nope. I've decided not to move to Scotland, but I will still visit every year if I can. I may even take a full month or two; working from my hotel or Air BnB; whichever it happens to be. I'll figure it out. I'm going to move to a larger small town in Oklahoma; where I can be within 2 hours of my kids (sorry Caity, you're going to be 3.5 hours away probably) and I'll have a hospital, a mall, all the amenities I have in Oklahoma City, but it's so so so much cheaper to live there. The houses are literally 1/3 the costs they are in OKC proper. NOT kidding.

    I don't like all the traffic, ambulances, highways, sirens from police, or the crime that we have in the big city. I don't like the homelessness issue; I think our counties should do more for these people. In the small towns, they don't have problems really; they tend to find solutions rather than adding to the problem. I like that about a small town. I like the hospitality, the politeness, the community feel, and the way folks still say thank you, please, and they address you as "Ma'am" without sounding rude about it.

    No, there aren't as many cinemas, but I don't go anymore. There aren't as many restaurants, but I cook, and if I do go out there's enough. There aren't as many choices with groceries, but I'll either go to the big city once a month, or I'll suffer with what I can find at the smaller stores. The city I'm moving to has 52,000 people, so it's not small, and there are quite a few choices to choose from. The main benefits are these:

Much cheaper housing.More choices for smaller houses with good-sized yards.Big dog!! I can get a big dog and no one will complain about it.I'll get a rifle and give my pistol to Laura.Electric, Gas, Water, Sewage, and Cable are actually cheaper.I won't need a dishwasher since it's just me, but I won't say no to one.A garbage disposal. I don't have one now.A washer and dryer in my house. Can't tell you how great that is.A garage for my car.Fenced yard for the dogs...multiple dogs.I might actually keep dogs overnight for folks for extra income.Peace and quiet from so many things that are so loud and noisy here.Lightning bugs.What I will miss?Being able to yell at Laura from the other room, but I could Facebook, call her, and yell at her from the phone. I'll go see her every 3 weeks when I go into town to see Jeannie.Jeannie.  She's the same as Laura, but I only actually see her every 3 weeks, so I can drive into town and see her.Niki....same. I mean, I do see her more, but she can move out to where I am too if she wants to.I'd say Robin, but we never really see each other. LOL. LOVE YOU.I don't see Caity and Reuben now, but I'll drive into OKC for the holidays now and again. (Same with the grands - they can stay with me if they want to for a couple of weeks in the summer.)Going to Winco, but again, I can drive in every 3 weeks and do that. I can stay overnight so I can make it a weekend thing. I'll bring my dogs when I do. I'll leave Bilbo, he'll be OK.I won't miss going to Braum's because I have one there. I won't miss going to the stores, I have them.  I won't miss Big Lots...I have one. I'm telling you, it's a good-sized small town, so I'll be just fine. My house payment for a two or even three-bedroom frame house with siding,  a big bathroom, laundry room, garage, fenced yard, porch, and patio, is literally $515 a month. That includes taxes and insurance. SERIOUSLY cheaper than where I live now. The same house is $160,000 instead of $60,000.  CRAZY. People need to realize that we old people are not as apt to pay $$$$ for big houses when the kids are gone. I'm 100% OK with a small house as long as it looks amazing inside.    
    I have a million plans with Pinterest too. I'll work Monday-Friday, 8-5, and during that time I'll still be able to pull up Pinterest! Can't wait to do so much to my little house and make it amazing. When? Well, we'll shoot for Christmas and see what happens, maybe just after the first of the year to be honest. Good times.


Photo Credit: Zillow.com  (this is only the type of house I will buy)