S.K.S. Perry's Blog, page 8
January 14, 2013
Writer Trait #23: Obssesing Over Nothing
It's an odd feeling to look at your Amazon sales report to find that someone has returned one of you books (after several days, I might add.)
My first thought is that they're just some cheap bastard who read it and then asked for a refund—whether they liked it or not—because they can. The second thought is that's it's obviously someone with poor taste. Next came, "Well, maybe they just finally got around to reading it and realised it wasn't the book they thought it was." Google "DARKSIDE" and you'll find everything from a song by Kelly Clarkson to a clothing line—not to mention a series of books by Tom Becker, a traditionally published YA author who's oodles more famous and successful than I am. (We won't even mention the whole STAR WARS thing.)
Finally came the thought, "Well, maybe they just really didn't like it." Hey, anything's possible. Although IMHO you have to really hate something to ask for a refund on a .99 cent book. (Or be on a very tight budget.)
Of course, what should have come to mind was, "Why the hell am I obsessing over 1 return?"
My first thought is that they're just some cheap bastard who read it and then asked for a refund—whether they liked it or not—because they can. The second thought is that's it's obviously someone with poor taste. Next came, "Well, maybe they just finally got around to reading it and realised it wasn't the book they thought it was." Google "DARKSIDE" and you'll find everything from a song by Kelly Clarkson to a clothing line—not to mention a series of books by Tom Becker, a traditionally published YA author who's oodles more famous and successful than I am. (We won't even mention the whole STAR WARS thing.)
Finally came the thought, "Well, maybe they just really didn't like it." Hey, anything's possible. Although IMHO you have to really hate something to ask for a refund on a .99 cent book. (Or be on a very tight budget.)
Of course, what should have come to mind was, "Why the hell am I obsessing over 1 return?"
January 11, 2013
A Lesser Man
My wife and I are on Day 10 of a 30 day Isagenix Diet Plan. It was her idea and I got dragged along for the ride, but hey, it's a lot easier with both of us on it. (I imagine if only one of us was on it they would kill the other as soon as they saw them eating a slice of pizza.) Ever since I was diagnosed with a thyroid condition I've had trouble dropping weight. No matter how much I exercised and cut out junk food, my body seemed content to maintain the weight I was at, so I thought, "Hey, it's only a month. I'll give it a shot."
The Isagenix people of course would like to get you to sell their product, but I have no interest in that, and they don't really bother you much other than the occasionally easily delete-able email.
Anyway, It's a pretty easy diet to follow as it's all laid out for you in the plan. Basically, everyday you take a bunch of pills, drink a couple of shakes, and eat a sensible, low calorie (400- 600 calories) meal. Oh, and drink lots of water.
They even send you a planner that says things like, "Enjoy an IsoLean Shake!" and "Choose 1 serving of a delicious Shake Day snack!"
For me, the worst part is that every morning starts with downing a glass of Ionix Supreme. The stuff tastes like wombat urine, and they don't even try to fool you buy saying "Enjoy a glass of Ionix Supreme." The instructions simply state, "Drink a glass of Ionix Supreme", mostly because if they said, "Choke down a glass of Ionix Supreme" no one would do it.
The shakes themselves aren't bad—I got the chocolate ones—and I eat an IsaLean bar for lunch instead of the shake because I can't be bothered to make the shakes at work. (BTW, they also send you a handy dandy blender to make the shakes with.) The bars taste like a cheap, chewy chocolate/caramel knock-off, and there's also a lemon bar that's not bad.
The cleanse days are a little rough, mostly because you have to drink TWO glasses of Ionix Supreme in a day. That and no real food, not even the shakes or bars, just lots of pills, a lot of snacks (the IsaDelight chocolates are pretty good), and several glasses of something called "Cleanse For Life."
We do one cleanse day in every seven. The first one wasn't bad, although the next day when it was time to have that one low calorie meal again, I'd have eaten road kill as long as it was still crunchy and solid.
I don't know if I could do this for much more than 30 days, but I only need to do it long enough to lose weight. My regular diet and exercise routine will allow me to maintain whatever weight I finally stop at.
It's not the easiest diet in the world to be on, but I still have plenty of energy to make it through my work day and go to the gym every night. I've lost a little over 10 pounds in the first 10 days—and it's not just water weight, either.
The Isagenix people of course would like to get you to sell their product, but I have no interest in that, and they don't really bother you much other than the occasionally easily delete-able email.
Anyway, It's a pretty easy diet to follow as it's all laid out for you in the plan. Basically, everyday you take a bunch of pills, drink a couple of shakes, and eat a sensible, low calorie (400- 600 calories) meal. Oh, and drink lots of water.
They even send you a planner that says things like, "Enjoy an IsoLean Shake!" and "Choose 1 serving of a delicious Shake Day snack!"
For me, the worst part is that every morning starts with downing a glass of Ionix Supreme. The stuff tastes like wombat urine, and they don't even try to fool you buy saying "Enjoy a glass of Ionix Supreme." The instructions simply state, "Drink a glass of Ionix Supreme", mostly because if they said, "Choke down a glass of Ionix Supreme" no one would do it.
The shakes themselves aren't bad—I got the chocolate ones—and I eat an IsaLean bar for lunch instead of the shake because I can't be bothered to make the shakes at work. (BTW, they also send you a handy dandy blender to make the shakes with.) The bars taste like a cheap, chewy chocolate/caramel knock-off, and there's also a lemon bar that's not bad.
The cleanse days are a little rough, mostly because you have to drink TWO glasses of Ionix Supreme in a day. That and no real food, not even the shakes or bars, just lots of pills, a lot of snacks (the IsaDelight chocolates are pretty good), and several glasses of something called "Cleanse For Life."
We do one cleanse day in every seven. The first one wasn't bad, although the next day when it was time to have that one low calorie meal again, I'd have eaten road kill as long as it was still crunchy and solid.
I don't know if I could do this for much more than 30 days, but I only need to do it long enough to lose weight. My regular diet and exercise routine will allow me to maintain whatever weight I finally stop at.
It's not the easiest diet in the world to be on, but I still have plenty of energy to make it through my work day and go to the gym every night. I've lost a little over 10 pounds in the first 10 days—and it's not just water weight, either.
December 20, 2012
Democracy - It's all about the toast.
I have a few problems with democracy.
First of all, it's hard to spell. Seriously, with 10% of the population having an IQ under 80 (see previous post) you'd think they could have come up with a simpler word for it. And it's too easy to confuse with Demoncrazy.
Secondly, just because the majority votes for something, it doesn't make it right. The majority could be a bunch of racist, homophobic, sexist motherfu**ers. Worse, they might be aliens, or zombies.
Thirdly, if there's more than two things to vote for, the majority might not even be the majority. Let's say the gov't initiates a make-work project to create jobs and stimulate the economy, so they decide to build a Really Big Thing. Not only will building it create jobs and use goods and services from the local economy, but people will come from miles around and pay to see the RBT, because we'redumb curious. The problem arises when it comes time to decide to paint the RBT. What colour should it be? Well, let's say they narrow the choices down to red, green, and blue (because that's the left over paint they have from when they built the Really Expensive Thing). For those of you playing along, that's THREE choices. So, right off the bat 40% of the people don't bother voting. Of the 60% who do vote, 30% vote for red, 40% vote blue, and 30% vote green. So, democratically the RBT will be painted blue, even though 60% of the people don't want it blue. And remember, that's just 60% of the people who voted. In actual fact, out of a hundred people, that means the RBT is now blue because roughly 24 people voted for it.
To make matters worse, those 24 people may have voted for it only because they were coerced, cajoled, and/or bribed to vote blue. Maybe some special interest group offered them all toasters to vote blue. Americans seem to have a thing for toast, seeing as every bank seems to give them away for opening an account with them. "I was just about to open an account with that bank across the street—you know, the one with the better interest rates and operating hours? But yours has free toasters!" Come the zombie apocalypse, our new currency will no doubt be toast. You heard it hear first.
So ultimately we end up with a Really Big Blue Thing because 24 people wanted a new toaster.
That's democracy for you.
First of all, it's hard to spell. Seriously, with 10% of the population having an IQ under 80 (see previous post) you'd think they could have come up with a simpler word for it. And it's too easy to confuse with Demoncrazy.
Secondly, just because the majority votes for something, it doesn't make it right. The majority could be a bunch of racist, homophobic, sexist motherfu**ers. Worse, they might be aliens, or zombies.
Thirdly, if there's more than two things to vote for, the majority might not even be the majority. Let's say the gov't initiates a make-work project to create jobs and stimulate the economy, so they decide to build a Really Big Thing. Not only will building it create jobs and use goods and services from the local economy, but people will come from miles around and pay to see the RBT, because we're
To make matters worse, those 24 people may have voted for it only because they were coerced, cajoled, and/or bribed to vote blue. Maybe some special interest group offered them all toasters to vote blue. Americans seem to have a thing for toast, seeing as every bank seems to give them away for opening an account with them. "I was just about to open an account with that bank across the street—you know, the one with the better interest rates and operating hours? But yours has free toasters!" Come the zombie apocalypse, our new currency will no doubt be toast. You heard it hear first.
So ultimately we end up with a Really Big Blue Thing because 24 people wanted a new toaster.
That's democracy for you.
December 19, 2012
Guns
I'm not going to talk about gun control. The issue is too divisive, and to be honest I can't make my mind up about it myself. (For instance, I think I should be allowed to carry a gun—but I'm not too sure about you.)
I've been trained to use guns. (And explosives, and rocket launchers and…). I've trained others to use guns. I'm in the military, yet I wouldn't trust a lot of my colleagues with fireworks, never mind firearms. It's not because of lack of training either, but lack of good judgement.
So if I find the training and judgement of even military personnel suspect, imagine what I think of average Joe Civilian.
I read stories like the one about those cops in New York a few months back in a shootout with an armed suspect who had just killed his boss. The headlines reported something like "Two dead, nine wounded in Empire State Building shooting." It turns out those "nine wounded" were all shot by the police as they tried to take down the gunman, who never even fired his weapon.
Again, this is by trained police officers.
When you're armed the use of lethal force becomes an option in any dispute (whether warranted or not.) I read about a military policeman who shot and killed two teenagers joyriding. They'd stolen a car. It turns out it was their mother's car, and she'd reported it stolen when they'd taken it without permission to teach them a lesson. They tried to evade the police instead of pulling over. The police called ahead to set up a rode block, and when the officer decided it didn't look like they were going to stop for it, he fired two shots through the windshield, killing the driver. The resulting crash killed the passenger. All for a stolen car. Had the police simply ceased pursuit, eventually the kids would have—well, ditched the car, at the worse. The cops knew who the thieves were and could have picked them up at any time afterward.
A man heard a noise coming from his front lawn at four in the morning. He spied what he thought was a burgler and shot him 14 times, with a 6 shot revolver. That means he had to reload, twice. Turns out it was the paper boy delivering the morning paper.
Nidal Malik Hassan opened fire on a military base (Fort Hood), killing 13 and wounding 29. He was eventually taken down by a base civilian policeman. Had the military personnel he shot been armed, the story would no doubt have ended with a lot fewer casualties. (Even so, a few reportedly charged Nidal and tried to disarm him even though they were unarmed themselves.) It should be noted, however, that even on a military base the average soldier isn't allowed to walk about armed, which may be oddly telling in itself.
I know there are times when an armed response has saved countless lives. I have been that armed response.
But given that I have little respect for the average Joe's judgement--especially in high stress situations--would I really feel safer knowing that Joe is armed in case of emergency? Or does Joe just become another shooter that I have to worry about.
The question then becomes who is allowed to carry, and why?
I don't have the answer to that.
I've been trained to use guns. (And explosives, and rocket launchers and…). I've trained others to use guns. I'm in the military, yet I wouldn't trust a lot of my colleagues with fireworks, never mind firearms. It's not because of lack of training either, but lack of good judgement.
So if I find the training and judgement of even military personnel suspect, imagine what I think of average Joe Civilian.
I read stories like the one about those cops in New York a few months back in a shootout with an armed suspect who had just killed his boss. The headlines reported something like "Two dead, nine wounded in Empire State Building shooting." It turns out those "nine wounded" were all shot by the police as they tried to take down the gunman, who never even fired his weapon.
Again, this is by trained police officers.
When you're armed the use of lethal force becomes an option in any dispute (whether warranted or not.) I read about a military policeman who shot and killed two teenagers joyriding. They'd stolen a car. It turns out it was their mother's car, and she'd reported it stolen when they'd taken it without permission to teach them a lesson. They tried to evade the police instead of pulling over. The police called ahead to set up a rode block, and when the officer decided it didn't look like they were going to stop for it, he fired two shots through the windshield, killing the driver. The resulting crash killed the passenger. All for a stolen car. Had the police simply ceased pursuit, eventually the kids would have—well, ditched the car, at the worse. The cops knew who the thieves were and could have picked them up at any time afterward.
A man heard a noise coming from his front lawn at four in the morning. He spied what he thought was a burgler and shot him 14 times, with a 6 shot revolver. That means he had to reload, twice. Turns out it was the paper boy delivering the morning paper.
Nidal Malik Hassan opened fire on a military base (Fort Hood), killing 13 and wounding 29. He was eventually taken down by a base civilian policeman. Had the military personnel he shot been armed, the story would no doubt have ended with a lot fewer casualties. (Even so, a few reportedly charged Nidal and tried to disarm him even though they were unarmed themselves.) It should be noted, however, that even on a military base the average soldier isn't allowed to walk about armed, which may be oddly telling in itself.
I know there are times when an armed response has saved countless lives. I have been that armed response.
But given that I have little respect for the average Joe's judgement--especially in high stress situations--would I really feel safer knowing that Joe is armed in case of emergency? Or does Joe just become another shooter that I have to worry about.
The question then becomes who is allowed to carry, and why?
I don't have the answer to that.
December 17, 2012
The numbers don't lie.
Percentages make me nervous, especially when dealing with large numbers of people.
For instance about 4% of the population are sociopaths. In Canada, that means about 138,000. In the U.S. that's 12 million or so. If only 1/100,000 of those are capable of murder, or worse yet mass-murder or serial murder, that means there's at least 1 operating in Canada and 120 within the U.S.
Almost 10% of the population has an IQ under 80. Again, that's about 3.4 million people in Canada; about 31 million in the U.S. (I'm sure most of them watch Fox News.)
Someone tried to tell me that 1 in 5 people are gay, but that number seems awfully high. I mean, there are five people working in my office and I don't think any of them are gay. (I'm rooting for Bob though, cause I think he's kind of cute.) I believe the numbers are more along the lines of 3.8% of Americans and 1% of Canadians who identify as gay.
Is it any wonder the U.S. is having trouble passing laws allowing gay people to marry? I mean, the gay community is outnumbered almost 4:1 by sociopaths and people with limited intelligence.
Of course I guess a person could belong to all three of these groups. Just my luck some gay mass-murdering moron will read this and take offense—well, after someone sounds out the big words for him/her.
For instance about 4% of the population are sociopaths. In Canada, that means about 138,000. In the U.S. that's 12 million or so. If only 1/100,000 of those are capable of murder, or worse yet mass-murder or serial murder, that means there's at least 1 operating in Canada and 120 within the U.S.
Almost 10% of the population has an IQ under 80. Again, that's about 3.4 million people in Canada; about 31 million in the U.S. (I'm sure most of them watch Fox News.)
Someone tried to tell me that 1 in 5 people are gay, but that number seems awfully high. I mean, there are five people working in my office and I don't think any of them are gay. (I'm rooting for Bob though, cause I think he's kind of cute.) I believe the numbers are more along the lines of 3.8% of Americans and 1% of Canadians who identify as gay.
Is it any wonder the U.S. is having trouble passing laws allowing gay people to marry? I mean, the gay community is outnumbered almost 4:1 by sociopaths and people with limited intelligence.
Of course I guess a person could belong to all three of these groups. Just my luck some gay mass-murdering moron will read this and take offense—well, after someone sounds out the big words for him/her.
December 14, 2012
Space Quizz:
A friend sent me this quick quizz on space, just for fun, and because he's a dick. Here are my answers:
Q1 One of the Vehicles used in the Lunar landings was called the "LEM" Wwhat did this stand for? And was it made of 1 or 2 parts?
Lunar Excursion Module in two parts. The Second part was initially called the Orbital Module, but the LEMON wouldn't fly.
Q2 The Lunar Rover was givin the majority of its testing where?
Monster Truck Ralley. We came this close to Scott and Irwin crater hopping in Truckzilla!
Q3 What is the mean ambient temperature in Space in degrees C? 1.-270c; 2. +27and sunny; 3. -345c
-27O degrees C, so don't stick your tongue to the Space Shuttle when you go.
Q4 True or False "In space no one can hear you scream?"
True, but they can see you wet your pants.
Q5 Name the 3 Astronauts involved in the Apollo 11 (1st) Lunar landing.
Lance Armstrong, Buzz Lightyear, and Tom Hanks.
Q6 The "LEM" Contained enough Fuel for how many attempts at a landing on the Moon?
One, as long as they didn't stop for bathroom breaks or directions.
Q7 The Rocket that sent all 7 Missions to the Moon was the Saturn V. How high was it? 1. 363ft; 2. 226ft; 3. 425ft
Saturn V? Wasn't that the freaky robot that tried to have its way with Farah Fawcett? How high were you when you wrote this question?
Q8 Aside from the LEM - what was the name of the other vehicle that orbited the Moon awaiting RV with the LEM after lunar exploration, and how many pers stayed in it during "LEM" landing?
The Eagle 5, crewed by Lone Starr and Barf.
Q9 Today's modern EMU Space suit consists of 12 bonded layers, is micro meteor proof, airtight, weighs 280lbs, and costs what? 1. $250k; 2.$12 million; 3. 5 dollars
The Gov't pays $12M, but you can get one at Wal-Mart for $5.99 if you use your Airmiles card.
Q10 when the Saturn 5 launched, the main first stage burned for 2.5min used 2,100,000kg of propellant and took it to approx 68km in altitude. What was its speed at this point? 1. 20mps; 2. 2300kph; 3. 6164mph?
Not sure, but I bet it still gets better gas milage than my Jeep Liberty.
Q11 How many days (average over all of the) did it take the Apollo mission's to get from Earth to the Moon? 1. 2.2days; 2. 4.3days; 3. 1 week
A little over 3 Days, longer if they stop for Pizza or argue over who gets to ride shotgun.
Q1 One of the Vehicles used in the Lunar landings was called the "LEM" Wwhat did this stand for? And was it made of 1 or 2 parts?
Lunar Excursion Module in two parts. The Second part was initially called the Orbital Module, but the LEMON wouldn't fly.
Q2 The Lunar Rover was givin the majority of its testing where?
Monster Truck Ralley. We came this close to Scott and Irwin crater hopping in Truckzilla!
Q3 What is the mean ambient temperature in Space in degrees C? 1.-270c; 2. +27and sunny; 3. -345c
-27O degrees C, so don't stick your tongue to the Space Shuttle when you go.
Q4 True or False "In space no one can hear you scream?"
True, but they can see you wet your pants.
Q5 Name the 3 Astronauts involved in the Apollo 11 (1st) Lunar landing.
Lance Armstrong, Buzz Lightyear, and Tom Hanks.
Q6 The "LEM" Contained enough Fuel for how many attempts at a landing on the Moon?
One, as long as they didn't stop for bathroom breaks or directions.
Q7 The Rocket that sent all 7 Missions to the Moon was the Saturn V. How high was it? 1. 363ft; 2. 226ft; 3. 425ft
Saturn V? Wasn't that the freaky robot that tried to have its way with Farah Fawcett? How high were you when you wrote this question?
Q8 Aside from the LEM - what was the name of the other vehicle that orbited the Moon awaiting RV with the LEM after lunar exploration, and how many pers stayed in it during "LEM" landing?
The Eagle 5, crewed by Lone Starr and Barf.
Q9 Today's modern EMU Space suit consists of 12 bonded layers, is micro meteor proof, airtight, weighs 280lbs, and costs what? 1. $250k; 2.$12 million; 3. 5 dollars
The Gov't pays $12M, but you can get one at Wal-Mart for $5.99 if you use your Airmiles card.
Q10 when the Saturn 5 launched, the main first stage burned for 2.5min used 2,100,000kg of propellant and took it to approx 68km in altitude. What was its speed at this point? 1. 20mps; 2. 2300kph; 3. 6164mph?
Not sure, but I bet it still gets better gas milage than my Jeep Liberty.
Q11 How many days (average over all of the) did it take the Apollo mission's to get from Earth to the Moon? 1. 2.2days; 2. 4.3days; 3. 1 week
A little over 3 Days, longer if they stop for Pizza or argue over who gets to ride shotgun.
December 13, 2012
Red Tape--it's the same everywhere.
The U.S. wants to tax me on the money I make selling my books through Amazon and Smashwords and the like, but because I'm Canadian apparently we have an agreement with them that says I don't have to pay Amercian taxes—just a lot more in Canadian taxes. It's kind of like two pimps fighting over the same ho.
Anyway, you'd think the fact that I'm a Canadian living in Canada with a Canadian postal address that they mail my checks to would suffice, but nuuu. I have to fill out some convoluted American Tax form to get the exemption. And why the f**k would they ask for a Social Security Number on a form designed to exempt people who are NOT AMERICAN CITIZENS.
No doubt it costs them more money in man hours and administration than the paltry sum they aren't going to collect from me anyway.
Apparently there's a number you can call for help, but when I called they just told me to fill out the form. I said, "If I knew how to fill out the form I wouldn't be calling you in the first place." They were unimpressed—and no help, I might add.
Anyway, you'd think the fact that I'm a Canadian living in Canada with a Canadian postal address that they mail my checks to would suffice, but nuuu. I have to fill out some convoluted American Tax form to get the exemption. And why the f**k would they ask for a Social Security Number on a form designed to exempt people who are NOT AMERICAN CITIZENS.
No doubt it costs them more money in man hours and administration than the paltry sum they aren't going to collect from me anyway.
Apparently there's a number you can call for help, but when I called they just told me to fill out the form. I said, "If I knew how to fill out the form I wouldn't be calling you in the first place." They were unimpressed—and no help, I might add.
December 12, 2012
The Next Big Thing Blog Hop
I have been tagged by Susan Elizabeth Curnow to participate in "The Next Big Thing Blog Hop." Before I start, you can read Susan's entry!
I just recently did one of these for the new DARKSIDE Novel I'm working on, so let's go with something different.
Okay, on with the questions.
************************************************************
What is the working title of your next book?
THE MOONLIGHT WAR
Where did the idea come from for the book?
I wanted to write a best seller heroic fantasy version of the movie, PITCH BLACK, along the lines of something David Gemmell might have written, but with a large cast of characters a la George R. R. Martin, and without anyone sleeping with their sister.
What genre does your book fall under?
Heroic/Epic Fantasy. Not only does it fall under those generes, but apparently it's been crushed by them.
What is the synopsis or blurb for this book?
Tasha O'Brienne: Rick Yune?
Setanna: Someone along the lines of Kristen Bell
Roclyn MaConmarra: Jason Stathom
Lord Myobi: Cary-Kiroyuki Tagawa
Connor: Daniel Craig
Mikhy: Lucas Haas
Brenn Shaunsie: John Boyega (Moses from Attack the Block)
Kieran: jamie campbell bower
Malaki:a younger Kristen Kruek?
Sindhara: Rachel Hurd-Wood
Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?
Ha ha ha! Oh, you were serious. Let's go with self-published.
How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript?
About two years, here and there, on and off.
Who or what inspired you to write this book?
The lack of any other viable job prospects. I'm hoping I can sell it for enough to at least afford me to live in one of those big refridgerator boxes out by the dumpster behind Walmart.
What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?
Anything by Gemmell. And maybe Fifty Shades of Grey (No, not really--but it made you look.)
What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?
If you like Gemmell, Martin, or Jorden you should like this. There's lots of intrigue and action, and of course I always put my own unique spin on the genre.
*************************************************************
Ta da! I would like to tag five terrific writers who will probably ignore this completely and write me hate mail for even suggesting they do this, but it looks like most of the writers I know tagged me first.
Oh wait--
barbarienne
,
burger_eater
,
wldhrsjen3
,
msisolak
,
mrissa
(You know where to send the hate mail; I'll be waiting.)
I just recently did one of these for the new DARKSIDE Novel I'm working on, so let's go with something different.
Okay, on with the questions.
************************************************************
What is the working title of your next book?
THE MOONLIGHT WAR
Where did the idea come from for the book?
I wanted to write a best seller heroic fantasy version of the movie, PITCH BLACK, along the lines of something David Gemmell might have written, but with a large cast of characters a la George R. R. Martin, and without anyone sleeping with their sister.
What genre does your book fall under?
Heroic/Epic Fantasy. Not only does it fall under those generes, but apparently it's been crushed by them.
What is the synopsis or blurb for this book?
Three caravans have vanished traversing the Cowcheanne Way. Rumors of native uprisings and bandit armies grow more widespread each day, while the more devout whisper about the return of the Horde, a mythic foe from ages past.
Tasha O’Brienne is an Omai Master, and the lone surviving defender of the Kael-tii city of Namao. To some he is a hero; to others a traitor. Haunted by the deaths of his comrades, he hires on as a guard for the next caravan out, believing he has nothing to lose.
He couldn't be more wrong.
The Ashai warlord, Lord Myobi, joins the caravan with a contingent of his elite soldiers. Convinced that the Way hides an ancient and powerful weapon used to defeat the Horde during the Last Crusade of Man, he will stop at nothing to acquire it.
Lady Setanna, the king's widowed niece, is a famed swordsman, but her wayward behavior sees her dismissed by the nobles as a serious contender for the throne. Now her uncle means to name her heir, and so gives her command of the caravan to prove herself worthy. Unaccustomed to the intrigues of politics, Setanna finds her loyalties torn between the people she has sworn to protect, her uncle's approval, and her mission to find the weapon before the Ashai do.
As the horrific nature of the ancient weapon slowly comes to light, the growing distrust between the Ashai and Kael-tii threatens to tear the caravan apart. Can they set aside their differences in time to combat the menace that imperils them all, or are they doomed to join the ranks of lost souls claimed by the cursed Cowcheanne Way?
Tasha O'Brienne: Rick Yune?
Setanna: Someone along the lines of Kristen Bell
Roclyn MaConmarra: Jason Stathom
Lord Myobi: Cary-Kiroyuki Tagawa
Connor: Daniel Craig
Mikhy: Lucas Haas
Brenn Shaunsie: John Boyega (Moses from Attack the Block)
Kieran: jamie campbell bower
Malaki:a younger Kristen Kruek?
Sindhara: Rachel Hurd-Wood
Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?
Ha ha ha! Oh, you were serious. Let's go with self-published.
How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript?
About two years, here and there, on and off.
Who or what inspired you to write this book?
The lack of any other viable job prospects. I'm hoping I can sell it for enough to at least afford me to live in one of those big refridgerator boxes out by the dumpster behind Walmart.
What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?
Anything by Gemmell. And maybe Fifty Shades of Grey (No, not really--but it made you look.)
What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?
If you like Gemmell, Martin, or Jorden you should like this. There's lots of intrigue and action, and of course I always put my own unique spin on the genre.
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Ta da! I would like to tag five terrific writers who will probably ignore this completely and write me hate mail for even suggesting they do this, but it looks like most of the writers I know tagged me first.
Oh wait--
barbarienne
,
burger_eater
,
wldhrsjen3
,
msisolak
,
mrissa
(You know where to send the hate mail; I'll be waiting.)
December 11, 2012
This started as a Xmas post but my ADHD kicked in.
It's that time of year at work where it's too close to Christmas to actually start a new project, but not close enough that you can actually be seen not doing anything. The trick now is to look busy without actually accomplishing anything. Of course in the military we have people who do that all year round; they're called Officers.
Speaking of which, tomorrow is the traditional Officers At Home, which would be fine if it was just, you know, a bunch of officers staying home. But nuuuu. All the Senior NCOs (sgt and up) host the officers at our mess, where they drink all our booze and eat all our food.
So basically, if you were to deduce what Canadian Forces Officers do from this post, it would be: they look busy but do nothing and sponge of the NCOs.
*Hmm…come to think of it, that's about right.
* Being an NCO, I may be slightly biased. (This is a legal disclaimer. My lawyers made me say this and it's not true. Officers drool, NCOs rule!)
Speaking of which, tomorrow is the traditional Officers At Home, which would be fine if it was just, you know, a bunch of officers staying home. But nuuuu. All the Senior NCOs (sgt and up) host the officers at our mess, where they drink all our booze and eat all our food.
So basically, if you were to deduce what Canadian Forces Officers do from this post, it would be: they look busy but do nothing and sponge of the NCOs.
*Hmm…come to think of it, that's about right.
* Being an NCO, I may be slightly biased. (This is a legal disclaimer. My lawyers made me say this and it's not true. Officers drool, NCOs rule!)
December 10, 2012
This post is all your fault.
I made a deal with myself that if I didn't have at least 15 replies from people by the end of the weekend stating they read my LJ that I'd quit blogging. To date I have 16. If I were a politician I'd claim that was "a mandate from the people".
So. They claim you should live every day as if it were your last. If so, I certainly wouldn't spend it at work. Unfortunately the military frowns on tardy attendance, and spending my last day in jail doesn't really appeal to me either.
So just how would I like to spend my last day—staying within the realms of practicality/possibility?
Well, I'd like to spend it on a tropical resort with friends and family, to start with. Maybe spend the day playing some beach volleyball, parasailing, jet-skiing, and lazing by the pool. Do a little diving/snorkelling, a motorcycle tour of the island, maybe explore some ancient ruins, swim in a cenote and dive from a waterfall. See a good movie. Sit down to a great dinner with everyone gathered about, talking about books and writing, laughing and reminiscing. A little after dinner dancing. Play a couple of sets with the band. Retire to bed with my loving wife, Pen. Die peacefully in my sleep.
Okay, maybe my last few days. Ideally I'd love to live every day like that.
Well, except for the "die peacefully in my sleep" part.
So how about you?
So. They claim you should live every day as if it were your last. If so, I certainly wouldn't spend it at work. Unfortunately the military frowns on tardy attendance, and spending my last day in jail doesn't really appeal to me either.
So just how would I like to spend my last day—staying within the realms of practicality/possibility?
Well, I'd like to spend it on a tropical resort with friends and family, to start with. Maybe spend the day playing some beach volleyball, parasailing, jet-skiing, and lazing by the pool. Do a little diving/snorkelling, a motorcycle tour of the island, maybe explore some ancient ruins, swim in a cenote and dive from a waterfall. See a good movie. Sit down to a great dinner with everyone gathered about, talking about books and writing, laughing and reminiscing. A little after dinner dancing. Play a couple of sets with the band. Retire to bed with my loving wife, Pen. Die peacefully in my sleep.
Okay, maybe my last few days. Ideally I'd love to live every day like that.
Well, except for the "die peacefully in my sleep" part.
So how about you?
