S.K.S. Perry's Blog, page 23
July 16, 2011
It could work!
So we had the 6.4 Km rucksack march this morning.
Me: How many fell out?
Sgt T: Only 2.
Me: Why'd they fall out?
Sgt T: They're weak!
Me: *nods* How are they doing now?
Sgt T: One is fine, but OS Bloggins is still feeling faint.
Me: Did you make sure they've properly hydrated?
Sgt T: Yes, although I don't know why they'd need it; they only made it 2 km and rode in the back of the van the rest of the way. They really don't need to go to the MIR, so I'm not sure what to do.
Me: Have you tried singing "Soft Kitty?"
Me: How many fell out?
Sgt T: Only 2.
Me: Why'd they fall out?
Sgt T: They're weak!
Me: *nods* How are they doing now?
Sgt T: One is fine, but OS Bloggins is still feeling faint.
Me: Did you make sure they've properly hydrated?
Sgt T: Yes, although I don't know why they'd need it; they only made it 2 km and rode in the back of the van the rest of the way. They really don't need to go to the MIR, so I'm not sure what to do.
Me: Have you tried singing "Soft Kitty?"
still haven't learned
Pen: I hate it when you're right.
Me: But that's all the time?
*smack*
I'm begining to sense a theme here
Me: But that's all the time?
*smack*
I'm begining to sense a theme here
July 15, 2011
R.E.S.P.E.C.T.
As I was going to be scamming taking the next day off, I sent the following email to the rest of the staff to rub it in provide clear direction while I was away:
Since I won't be at work on Thursday, firstly I'd like to say NEENER NEENER.
Secondly, the new schedules are in the Vimy Pl folder/schedules/week 4. I didn't print them off yet in case someone complained (Jackie)* and you had to make changes.
Lastly, the night orders for Thursday are complete and in the Vimy Pl folder/Night Orders/14 Jul. All you have to do is add the Points of the Day.
Thanks, have a great Navy Day, and once again -- NEENER NEENER.
S.K.S. Perry
Sgt
Vimy Ridge Platoon 2 I/C
The Platoon Commander's response was:
Have I told you where to go today?
That's why we get along so well. *g*
*For the record, the reason I expected Jackie to complain is because I didn't task her with enough classes, not that we might have tasked her with too many.
Since I won't be at work on Thursday, firstly I'd like to say NEENER NEENER.
Secondly, the new schedules are in the Vimy Pl folder/schedules/week 4. I didn't print them off yet in case someone complained (Jackie)* and you had to make changes.
Lastly, the night orders for Thursday are complete and in the Vimy Pl folder/Night Orders/14 Jul. All you have to do is add the Points of the Day.
Thanks, have a great Navy Day, and once again -- NEENER NEENER.
S.K.S. Perry
Sgt
Vimy Ridge Platoon 2 I/C
The Platoon Commander's response was:
Have I told you where to go today?
That's why we get along so well. *g*
*For the record, the reason I expected Jackie to complain is because I didn't task her with enough classes, not that we might have tasked her with too many.
July 14, 2011
I don't know when to quit
Pen--cleaning up after we finished eating take-out chicken from Swiss Chalet: "Did you even use your cutlery?"
Me--scowling at the absurd notion: "Nope. It was just like Medieval Times."
Pen--skeptically: Medieval Times, eh?"
Me: "Yep, I was even served by a wench!"
*smack*
Me--scowling at the absurd notion: "Nope. It was just like Medieval Times."
Pen--skeptically: Medieval Times, eh?"
Me: "Yep, I was even served by a wench!"
*smack*
July 12, 2011
I have a bad feeling about this.
I got a letter from Service Canada a few days ago stating that "Information obtained from a Canada Border Services Agency Traveller Declaration Card indicates I travelled outside of Canada from 01 Jan 2010 to 17 Jan 2011." That's right, apparently I was vacationing in Mexico for over a year, and not for the week (10 Jan 2011 – 17 Jan 2011) that I actually was.
So now somehow I have to prove to them that I was actually in Canada all last year. WTF?
Why not just send them a photocopy of your passport, you say? Because when my wife checked the stamp on both our passports it says—you guessed it—Jan 2010.
Obviously the Custom's Agent at the airport hadn't changed over the date for the rollover of the new year, which begs the question—how many other people are having this same problem?
Anyway, I'm pretty sure I can get this sorted out, but knowing gov't bureaucracy they'll probably deport me to Mexico for a year or two first while they sort it out. So it's not all bad.
So now somehow I have to prove to them that I was actually in Canada all last year. WTF?
Why not just send them a photocopy of your passport, you say? Because when my wife checked the stamp on both our passports it says—you guessed it—Jan 2010.
Obviously the Custom's Agent at the airport hadn't changed over the date for the rollover of the new year, which begs the question—how many other people are having this same problem?
Anyway, I'm pretty sure I can get this sorted out, but knowing gov't bureaucracy they'll probably deport me to Mexico for a year or two first while they sort it out. So it's not all bad.
July 10, 2011
The internet connects me to military comrades, other writ...
The internet connects me to military comrades, other writers, friends, and family. The internet connects my wife to Prada, Gucci, Louis Vuitton, and Manolo Blahniks.
July 9, 2011
Let's see the Flying Wallendas do that!
As part of the obstacle confidence course the recruits have to crawl across a rope about ten feet above the ground. The first twenty feet or so are over land while the second half of the traverse is over water. If they fall over water it's not a problem but while they're over land there's obviously greater potential for injury.
One of the smaller female recruits—who is also terrified of heights, btw—was really struggling so of course I was laughing and pointing yelling and screaming encouraging her along when suddenly she lost her grip. I managed to catch her but lost my balance in the sand and had to tuck into a combat roll to recover—while still holding on to the recruit!
Recruit: *Crying and trying to catch her breath—but otherwise okay.*
Me: "What are you crying for? That was AWESOME. I'm pretty sure that's got to be the first tandem combat roll in history!"
Recruit: *still sobbing* "Thank you, Sgt."
Somehow I got the impression that she wasn't quite as enamoured of our accomplishment as I was. Go figure.
One of the smaller female recruits—who is also terrified of heights, btw—was really struggling so of course I was laughing and pointing yelling and screaming encouraging her along when suddenly she lost her grip. I managed to catch her but lost my balance in the sand and had to tuck into a combat roll to recover—while still holding on to the recruit!
Recruit: *Crying and trying to catch her breath—but otherwise okay.*
Me: "What are you crying for? That was AWESOME. I'm pretty sure that's got to be the first tandem combat roll in history!"
Recruit: *still sobbing* "Thank you, Sgt."
Somehow I got the impression that she wasn't quite as enamoured of our accomplishment as I was. Go figure.
July 2, 2011
Dumb Sgt Moments
Me: Recruit, do up that button!
Recruit: Yes, Sgt! *fumbles with button.
Me: It's a button, not a rubik's cube. Get it done!
Recruit: *button pops off and rolls around on the ground*
Me: Now you've done it. *points to second recruit* Recruit, throw that man roughly to the ground.
*Both recruits stare at me like a deer caught in the headlights.
Me: *sighs* Never mind. Get that button sewn on, do it up, and don't let me see you in that state again.
Recruit: Yes, Sgt! *fumbles with button.
Me: It's a button, not a rubik's cube. Get it done!
Recruit: *button pops off and rolls around on the ground*
Me: Now you've done it. *points to second recruit* Recruit, throw that man roughly to the ground.
*Both recruits stare at me like a deer caught in the headlights.
Me: *sighs* Never mind. Get that button sewn on, do it up, and don't let me see you in that state again.
July 1, 2011
Speaking of Dumb Recruit Moments
I'm Duty NCO on Canada Day at the moment, btw. The smokers in the platoon have to form up outside my office at the top of the hour while one of them reports to let me know how many of them are going for a smoke. They have ten minutes, then they have to report that they're all back:
*knock*
Me: Report!
Recruit: OS Bloggins 123, Meso 524. 5 Smokers reporting for a ciggarette.
Me: All five of you are sharing a cigarette? Now that's teamwork.
Recruit: But--
Me: That's all. Carry on.
Recruit: *Calls down the hallway to the rest* The Sgt says we have to share a cigarette!
Random Recruit: We'll smoke mine--it's unfiltered, so it's longer.
*knock*
Me: Report!
Recruit: OS Bloggins 123, Meso 524. 5 Smokers reporting for a ciggarette.
Me: All five of you are sharing a cigarette? Now that's teamwork.
Recruit: But--
Me: That's all. Carry on.
Recruit: *Calls down the hallway to the rest* The Sgt says we have to share a cigarette!
Random Recruit: We'll smoke mine--it's unfiltered, so it's longer.
It's Official
As I've mentioned earlier in this blog, this will be my last recruit platoon. NRTD is basically closing shop, and while recruit training has probably been the most rewarding job of my career, I have to eat. Well, Pen has to eat, at least. I could probably survive on Diet Pepsi.
Anyway, to that end I gave my 30 day notice on Wednesday. I applied for and was accepted to the position of Avionics Technician Standards Sgt at CFSATE (Canadian Forces School of Aerospace Technology and Engineering.)
My last day of recruit training will be 29 July, even though the course doesn't actually finish until 25 Aug. (My son's birthday, by coincidence, even though he won't be here; he's on deployment in Alert.) I could have gotten away with giving 2 weeks notice, but I didn't want to leave the staff in a lurch, or the recruits either for that matter. By the time I leave they will have completed 6 weeks of a 9 week course (and the last week is just graduation parade practice anyway). That's enough to make sure the remaining staff know what they're doing, and the recruits as well.
While I may miss recruit training, it might be nice to work a simple 7:30-16:00 hours, 5 day a week, weekends-and-holiday-off-and-no-field-time job for a while—and only 1 Base Duty a year!
It will probably also mark the end of Dumb Recruit Moments, possibly to be replaced by Dumb Technician Moments. "This is a hacksaw. This is a screw driver. Never use a screw driver as a hacksaw and vice versa."
Anyway, to that end I gave my 30 day notice on Wednesday. I applied for and was accepted to the position of Avionics Technician Standards Sgt at CFSATE (Canadian Forces School of Aerospace Technology and Engineering.)
My last day of recruit training will be 29 July, even though the course doesn't actually finish until 25 Aug. (My son's birthday, by coincidence, even though he won't be here; he's on deployment in Alert.) I could have gotten away with giving 2 weeks notice, but I didn't want to leave the staff in a lurch, or the recruits either for that matter. By the time I leave they will have completed 6 weeks of a 9 week course (and the last week is just graduation parade practice anyway). That's enough to make sure the remaining staff know what they're doing, and the recruits as well.
While I may miss recruit training, it might be nice to work a simple 7:30-16:00 hours, 5 day a week, weekends-and-holiday-off-and-no-field-time job for a while—and only 1 Base Duty a year!
It will probably also mark the end of Dumb Recruit Moments, possibly to be replaced by Dumb Technician Moments. "This is a hacksaw. This is a screw driver. Never use a screw driver as a hacksaw and vice versa."
